The End Of The F***ing World (2017) s01e04 Episode Script
Episode 4
1 Isn't it a bit fucked up wearing his clothes? I think the fucked up bit was murdering him.
Sorry.
It's OK.
Should we go to the police? What? It was self-defence.
We broke into his house, James.
Yeah, he was going to hurt you.
You think that they're going to believe that? It's the truth.
VOICEOVER: Alyssa seemed weirdly calm.
VOICEOVER: Fuck, fuck.
We need to get rid of the body.
Come on.
James! Sorry.
One, two, three! Shit! Again.
One, two, three.
Dead people are heavier than alive people.
I read that.
Good to know.
We need to clean everything up.
We need to get rid of any trace of us.
Do you hear me, James? Do you understand? No-one can know that we've been here, OK? If we can't get rid of him, we've got to get rid of us.
Go find some bleach.
Take your shoes off, and clean up that blood! VOICEOVER: This is bad! This is really fucking bad! VOICEOVER: Alyssa seemed to know what she was doing.
I figured that if I just did what I was told, then it might be all right.
VOICEOVER: I don't know if this is the right thing to be doing, I'm just thinking about what people on the TV do when they've done this.
VOICEOVER: She said it would help to have some music on whilst we cleaned.
It kind of did.
MUSIC: Zu Zu By The Bonnevilles LOUD THUD FROM UPSTAIRS James? VOICEOVER: It wasn't how I thought it would be.
Not at all.
James.
Yeah? What are you doing? James? I don't know.
VOICEOVER: What the fuck is he doing? What have you done? He was gonna hurt you, Alyssa.
He was.
SOMEONE SCREAMS IN VIDEO INDISTINCT VOICE OF A MAN OK.
Put those around him, and then let's get out of here.
VOICEOVER: Keep it together.
Keep it together.
MUSIC: Smile By Timi Yuro VOICEOVER: We learnt, much later, that we'd really messed up.
VOICEOVER: It's strange.
A lot of the time you don't register the important moments in your life as they happen.
You only see that they were important when you look back.
Like, that was an ending.
So was that.
Fuck off.
VOICEOVER: And that was That was the beginning of something.
Something massive.
Maybe something massive and awful, really awful, like, fuck up your whole life awful.
I need to get to my dad's as soon as possible, before anybody finds a body.
OK.
He'll know what to do.
Come on.
# Outside the window they're singing Inside the doorway there's me.
Why didn't you burn your jacket? It didn't have any blood on it.
Yes, but I'm not getting rid of it, James.
It's my dad's.
James? James! We should wait for a bit.
What, why? If we get this one, we're travelling peak.
It's more expensive.
VOICEOVER: I think there's something wrong with him.
VOICEOVER: Fuck.
Fuck, we killed someone.
We fucking killed someone.
What if someone saw us? What if someone saw us leave the house?! What if someone recognises us? Fuck! We need to change the way we look.
VOICEOVER: Turns out James is quite a good hairdresser.
My mum always wanted me to go blonde.
Guess she'll be really fucking pleased with me.
We need new clothes.
VOICEOVER: I think it's fair to say that my disguise wasn't as effective as Alyssa's.
I looked pretty much the same.
Is there not another size? These are a bit tight.
It was a shit Oxfam, they had about ten things.
It's not my fault you look thinner than you are.
VOICEOVER: I don't recognise myself.
Jesus, it's so quiet here.
Where did you get the knife from? What? The one you killed him with.
Was it yours? MUSIC: Care A Little By Bernadette Carroll SHE RINGS DOOR BELL Hello? Clive? Darling? WOMAN SCREAMS Jesus.
Hiya.
Hi.
Got you this.
It's a crime scene.
So So.
Sorry Please go ahead.
Please.
I was just going to say Clive Koch, late 40s.
Clive what? Koch? Let me just see.
K-O-C-H, probably German.
He was found by his mother.
Late 70s.
God.
Poor thing, she didn't have a clue what was going on.
Is that a new coat? No.
Really nice .
.
cut.
Fucking hell! Quite a buff on that.
Found this.
Under the bed.
Terry.
Do you want to tell us why we've got your wallet here? She said she was 17, I swear to you, I asked.
I asked like a few times.
She showed me her ID.
It said 17, I swear I checked.
Calm down! I promise you.
OK, now let me see if I've got this straight.
You met this girl for the first time yesterday, completely randomly, and went back to this house with her? For sex, right? No, we never had sex.
The sex, or lack thereof is not why you're here.
What? You had no idea whose house it was? No, what you talking about? The man whose house it was, he was murdered last night.
Oh, fuck me, this is all just Tell me about the girl.
What was her name? Alyssa.
Alyssa, what are we going to do? Are we still going to your dad's? Well, we should probably eat something.
Alyssa had started being weird with me.
It was a present from my dad.
The knife.
What's it for? Hunting.
Yeah, cos that's a big thing where we live, isn't it? Who carries a hunting knife around with them, James? I realised that she was scared of me.
That felt kind of unfair.
I'd been her protector.
Did you notice anything distinctive about her? Angry looking? But almost pretty but actually average.
And do you want to give her a score out of ten? Like I'm joking.
Oh, no, no, I mean like she's fine, she's fine, not like a model, you know? What was she wearing? Before you undressed her and tried to have sex with her, I mean.
Just like normal, I don't know, jeans, a T-shirt, and this weird jacket.
Weird like how? It was, like, quite shit.
Weird because it was quite shit, but sort of cool because it was, do you know what I mean? No.
It was like a brown leather jacket, sort of baggy on her.
Oh, and it wasn't just her, in the house, yeah, there was another guy there too.
This guy? No, no, no, he was younger.
Erm, ah, I think his name was .
.
James? I decided to put on a calmer, more relaxed demeanour.
To reassure Alyssa.
There's definitely something wrong with him.
You OK? What? Are you OK? Yeah.
It didn't work.
What's the matter? What's the matter? What's the matter? The matter, James, is that last night you fucking murdered someone.
And every time I try to close my eyes or think about anything, anything else, all I can see is his face.
And his neck, and you stabbing him.
Thanks.
Do you want mustard too? On chips? Some people like it.
SHE GIGGLES Alyssa I don't want to hold your hand.
I'm going to the toilet.
Sorry.
So, his alibi checks out.
What? Clive Koch died between midnight and 3am, the twat in there was at a house party during that time.
Witnesses? Yes.
Lot's of other twats.
OK.
Listen, I've been meaning to, um .
.
could we have a quick chat at some point? What about? Well, you know, I thought could we talk about what happened the other night? You know what? Don't worry about it.
OK, let's put out a request for any sightings or any crimes involving two teenagers in the area.
Give them a description of the jacket and put the names Alyssa and James into missing persons.
Either they killed him, or they might have seen who did.
We need to find them.
My heart can't take this.
MUSIC: Lonesome Town by Ricky Nelson I sat for about half an hour until I realised that Alyssa had left.
# There's a place where lovers go To cry their troubles away That was the day I learned that silence is really loud.
Deafening.
I think maybe my dad spent his whole life trying to avoid silence.
When you have silence, it's hard to keep stuff out.
It's all there, and you can't get rid of it.
I used to be able to get rid of things, banish them.
# Goin' down to lonesome town # Where the broken hearts stay Goin' down to lonesome town But I knew after that day, it wouldn't be so easy any more.
In the town of broken dreams You all right? Do you want to hit me? Are you OK? Please, will you beat me up? I'll pay you.
I was never Alyssa's protector.
She was mine.
Having finally murdered a human .
.
I realised something quite important Police, please.
I was pretty sure I wasn't a psychopath.
I'd like to report a murder.
Sorry.
It's OK.
Should we go to the police? What? It was self-defence.
We broke into his house, James.
Yeah, he was going to hurt you.
You think that they're going to believe that? It's the truth.
VOICEOVER: Alyssa seemed weirdly calm.
VOICEOVER: Fuck, fuck.
We need to get rid of the body.
Come on.
James! Sorry.
One, two, three! Shit! Again.
One, two, three.
Dead people are heavier than alive people.
I read that.
Good to know.
We need to clean everything up.
We need to get rid of any trace of us.
Do you hear me, James? Do you understand? No-one can know that we've been here, OK? If we can't get rid of him, we've got to get rid of us.
Go find some bleach.
Take your shoes off, and clean up that blood! VOICEOVER: This is bad! This is really fucking bad! VOICEOVER: Alyssa seemed to know what she was doing.
I figured that if I just did what I was told, then it might be all right.
VOICEOVER: I don't know if this is the right thing to be doing, I'm just thinking about what people on the TV do when they've done this.
VOICEOVER: She said it would help to have some music on whilst we cleaned.
It kind of did.
MUSIC: Zu Zu By The Bonnevilles LOUD THUD FROM UPSTAIRS James? VOICEOVER: It wasn't how I thought it would be.
Not at all.
James.
Yeah? What are you doing? James? I don't know.
VOICEOVER: What the fuck is he doing? What have you done? He was gonna hurt you, Alyssa.
He was.
SOMEONE SCREAMS IN VIDEO INDISTINCT VOICE OF A MAN OK.
Put those around him, and then let's get out of here.
VOICEOVER: Keep it together.
Keep it together.
MUSIC: Smile By Timi Yuro VOICEOVER: We learnt, much later, that we'd really messed up.
VOICEOVER: It's strange.
A lot of the time you don't register the important moments in your life as they happen.
You only see that they were important when you look back.
Like, that was an ending.
So was that.
Fuck off.
VOICEOVER: And that was That was the beginning of something.
Something massive.
Maybe something massive and awful, really awful, like, fuck up your whole life awful.
I need to get to my dad's as soon as possible, before anybody finds a body.
OK.
He'll know what to do.
Come on.
# Outside the window they're singing Inside the doorway there's me.
Why didn't you burn your jacket? It didn't have any blood on it.
Yes, but I'm not getting rid of it, James.
It's my dad's.
James? James! We should wait for a bit.
What, why? If we get this one, we're travelling peak.
It's more expensive.
VOICEOVER: I think there's something wrong with him.
VOICEOVER: Fuck.
Fuck, we killed someone.
We fucking killed someone.
What if someone saw us? What if someone saw us leave the house?! What if someone recognises us? Fuck! We need to change the way we look.
VOICEOVER: Turns out James is quite a good hairdresser.
My mum always wanted me to go blonde.
Guess she'll be really fucking pleased with me.
We need new clothes.
VOICEOVER: I think it's fair to say that my disguise wasn't as effective as Alyssa's.
I looked pretty much the same.
Is there not another size? These are a bit tight.
It was a shit Oxfam, they had about ten things.
It's not my fault you look thinner than you are.
VOICEOVER: I don't recognise myself.
Jesus, it's so quiet here.
Where did you get the knife from? What? The one you killed him with.
Was it yours? MUSIC: Care A Little By Bernadette Carroll SHE RINGS DOOR BELL Hello? Clive? Darling? WOMAN SCREAMS Jesus.
Hiya.
Hi.
Got you this.
It's a crime scene.
So So.
Sorry Please go ahead.
Please.
I was just going to say Clive Koch, late 40s.
Clive what? Koch? Let me just see.
K-O-C-H, probably German.
He was found by his mother.
Late 70s.
God.
Poor thing, she didn't have a clue what was going on.
Is that a new coat? No.
Really nice .
.
cut.
Fucking hell! Quite a buff on that.
Found this.
Under the bed.
Terry.
Do you want to tell us why we've got your wallet here? She said she was 17, I swear to you, I asked.
I asked like a few times.
She showed me her ID.
It said 17, I swear I checked.
Calm down! I promise you.
OK, now let me see if I've got this straight.
You met this girl for the first time yesterday, completely randomly, and went back to this house with her? For sex, right? No, we never had sex.
The sex, or lack thereof is not why you're here.
What? You had no idea whose house it was? No, what you talking about? The man whose house it was, he was murdered last night.
Oh, fuck me, this is all just Tell me about the girl.
What was her name? Alyssa.
Alyssa, what are we going to do? Are we still going to your dad's? Well, we should probably eat something.
Alyssa had started being weird with me.
It was a present from my dad.
The knife.
What's it for? Hunting.
Yeah, cos that's a big thing where we live, isn't it? Who carries a hunting knife around with them, James? I realised that she was scared of me.
That felt kind of unfair.
I'd been her protector.
Did you notice anything distinctive about her? Angry looking? But almost pretty but actually average.
And do you want to give her a score out of ten? Like I'm joking.
Oh, no, no, I mean like she's fine, she's fine, not like a model, you know? What was she wearing? Before you undressed her and tried to have sex with her, I mean.
Just like normal, I don't know, jeans, a T-shirt, and this weird jacket.
Weird like how? It was, like, quite shit.
Weird because it was quite shit, but sort of cool because it was, do you know what I mean? No.
It was like a brown leather jacket, sort of baggy on her.
Oh, and it wasn't just her, in the house, yeah, there was another guy there too.
This guy? No, no, no, he was younger.
Erm, ah, I think his name was .
.
James? I decided to put on a calmer, more relaxed demeanour.
To reassure Alyssa.
There's definitely something wrong with him.
You OK? What? Are you OK? Yeah.
It didn't work.
What's the matter? What's the matter? What's the matter? The matter, James, is that last night you fucking murdered someone.
And every time I try to close my eyes or think about anything, anything else, all I can see is his face.
And his neck, and you stabbing him.
Thanks.
Do you want mustard too? On chips? Some people like it.
SHE GIGGLES Alyssa I don't want to hold your hand.
I'm going to the toilet.
Sorry.
So, his alibi checks out.
What? Clive Koch died between midnight and 3am, the twat in there was at a house party during that time.
Witnesses? Yes.
Lot's of other twats.
OK.
Listen, I've been meaning to, um .
.
could we have a quick chat at some point? What about? Well, you know, I thought could we talk about what happened the other night? You know what? Don't worry about it.
OK, let's put out a request for any sightings or any crimes involving two teenagers in the area.
Give them a description of the jacket and put the names Alyssa and James into missing persons.
Either they killed him, or they might have seen who did.
We need to find them.
My heart can't take this.
MUSIC: Lonesome Town by Ricky Nelson I sat for about half an hour until I realised that Alyssa had left.
# There's a place where lovers go To cry their troubles away That was the day I learned that silence is really loud.
Deafening.
I think maybe my dad spent his whole life trying to avoid silence.
When you have silence, it's hard to keep stuff out.
It's all there, and you can't get rid of it.
I used to be able to get rid of things, banish them.
# Goin' down to lonesome town # Where the broken hearts stay Goin' down to lonesome town But I knew after that day, it wouldn't be so easy any more.
In the town of broken dreams You all right? Do you want to hit me? Are you OK? Please, will you beat me up? I'll pay you.
I was never Alyssa's protector.
She was mine.
Having finally murdered a human .
.
I realised something quite important Police, please.
I was pretty sure I wasn't a psychopath.
I'd like to report a murder.