The Great Escapists (2021) s01e04 Episode Script

[intriguing music]
This doesn't make any sense.
Tory, I want you to know that I take
no comfort from being right.
There are no ships coming
and I always knew it.
But my calculations are right.
There should have been a boat,
there should have been at least 2 boats.
No. Your calculations are
the insane ramblings of a madman.
There are no boats coming
and now we're stuck here,
you, me and Clarkson.
[Richard] With no food,
no water, no sail,
no fuel and no hope.
The fact is, we're gonna die.
[fateful music]
[suspenseful music]
Right!
What are you doing?
I am taking control of the situation
and of our destinies.
[Tory] By tearing apart the raft?
[Richard] There are plenty of bits
on this raft that can be burnt
to make fuel to get back to our island.
[Tory laughing] Look
who's lost their mind now?
[Richard] All of this.
You can burn all of this.
- Yes, let's burn Clarkson next.
- No.
Just wood.
There you go.
I reckon if we can do, I dunno,
a kilometre an hour, we can get back.
[Tory] Even if we did get
this thing running,
how are we going to find our way back?
Well, it just happens, here is
a map that I sketched out
as we were leaving.
That's the bearing we were on, 2-9-0.
We want to do a reciprocal track
of 180 degrees in the other direction
so we subtract 180 from 290
which gives us?
- 110.
- Yep!
Which I can pick up on my telephone.
We're saved.
So, burn anything you can from the raft,
anything you find at all,
including parts of yourself. Needs must.
[sailor music]
[Tory] All right, here we go.
[Tory screaming merrily]
[Richard] Yeah!
[Richard] I mean, yes.
Burning the boat to get back
to the island was a high-risk strategy.
But, you know, fortune favours the brave.
Or the stupid.
Look we made it almost.
[epic music]
[Tory] No! We're out of wood again!
- [Richard] It's just there.
- I know!
So yeah, we ran out of boat to burn.
That was the first flaw
in Richard's plan.
Then we discovered the second.
[Tory] Richard! It's sinking!
- [Tory] Oh boy!
- Tory, we're sinking quite badly.
[tense music]
Oh! That was a bad idea!
[Tory screaming]
[Richard] I think we're going
to have to abandon ship.
Oh no!
Save me, Clarkson!
[both grunting]
[both panting]
[Richard] It's gone!
[Tory panting]
[Richard] It's definitely gone!
Richard!
Richard, are you okay?
Yes!
I was devastated.
That was our best chance of escape.
It was heartbreaking.
[action music]
[Richard] Don't worry, we survived.
Obviously.
What about the other one?
"Señor"
Clarkson?
Well, you know what they say:
never leave a man behind.
Even if it is Clarkson.
[epic music]
Oh Clarkson!
Clarkson!
[light music]
Did you know,
an 85-kilogram person
needs 65 grams of protein a day.
And the average red snapper
provides 100 grams of protein.
So, really, we only need to
catch 10 fish a week to survive.
Oh, just 10? Is that all?
Are you doing sarcasm?
No, I love catching fish.
I mean, I'm the only one that's doing it.
It's only fishing. Relax!
Oh, thank you, because I was stressed
out, but now that you've said relax,
I can take it easy.
Why don't you do the fishing?
Here you go. I've had it.
- [Richard] Ooh!
- Enjoy!
Somebody got out of his hammock
the wrong side this morning, Clarkson.
[melancholic music]
The steamboat disaster
hit me pretty hard.
I missed home. I missed my family.
I was desperate.
I had to figure out a way to let
people know where we were.
And it wasn't going to be
a stupid message in a bottle.
[melancholic music continues]
What are we going to do, Clarkson?
He's obviously suffering.
And he's really spoiling
the atmosphere around here.
I need to do something to cheer him up.
Wait a minute.
It's coming up to the 4th of July.
Americans love that stuff.
That's the answer! Genius!
Thank you, Clarkson.
[cheerful music]
[clearing his throat]
Nice tan
Hi guys, Richard Hammond here.
Still castaway on a desert island
somewhere in the middle of the Pacific
with my castaway pal Tory Belleci,
who is currently miserable.
He's really down,
I think the solitude is getting to him.
So I am going to cheer him up.
I know, you wouldn't expect
anything else right?
I'm going to do it this way,
by throwing him
the most magnificent 4th of July party.
Americans really dig all of that stuff.
And he's been moaning
about doing all the fishing,
so I'm going to build him,
this is a scale model of it
I'm going to build him
a full size version of this,
an automatic fish catcher.
Yeah. Catch this, captain
That's a helluva tan. Yeah.
"Señor" Hammond, what does catching fish
have to do with the 4th of July?
Fish burgers!
[in Spanish] "Qué"?
Every 4th of July party
needs burgers, yeah?
But there were no butcher shops
on the island. Trust me, I'd looked.
So I decided to make
fish burgers instead,
which would take a lot of fish.
So I set about secretly building
what I think you'll find is yet
another of my brilliant world firsts.
[playful music]
[hammer knocking]
[saw rubbing]
[Tory] What are you doing?
I am building for you
an automatic fish-catcher.
Is that what all that's for?
[Richard] To save your time
and make your life easier.
Let me just talk you through
what we've got here.
We have, I believe, the world's first
water-wheel powered
twin-bobbin lure-based infinite
fishing line automatic fish-catcher.
- How does it work?
- Well, take a line
off the water-wheel itself,
that comes down to these bobbins here.
That's the drive-line,
that then drives the second bobbin
which powers our looped fishing line.
So it's constantly going, dragging lures,
they spin, the fish goes
- And you did all this for me?
- For you.
- You're just so thoughtful
- I'm just a nice guy.
Now you can help me.
[Richard] Why don't you hold that
and I'm going to string this up
to the drive wheels.
- Okay?
- Yeah.
- It's gonna be brilliant.
- This is awesome.
It's gonna be awesome. I said awesome.
- [Tory] "Awesome!"
- I am not going home an American.
Be careful.
[playful music]
[Richard screaming]
[Tory] You all right?
Yes.
I didn't need them anyway.
[Tory] That's a good point.
This is the smaller winch
and it's gonna form
a tensioner.
Can you get that end of it?
There we go.
- I got it.
- Right now tie that up,
- If you tension that
- Yep.
What we've got to counter now,
is it the catenary effect?
It's something like that. It's
the actual weight of the line itself,
it sags because of gravity
acting along a longer length of line.
The more line you have, the more gravity.
[Richard] Right, that
goes under there.
And that keeps tension
and stops the whole thing sagging.
- Okay.
- Now,
these are all our lures.
I don't want to state the obvious but
you did take the tide into consideration
by setting this, right?
Yes, this is at low tide right now.
When the tide is in
this will be under water.
[light music]
[Tory] We better hurry.
The tide is coming in.
[Richard] You're gonna love this
because it's deceptively simple
but clever.
- You've been busy.
To turn it on, we need a clutch. We can't
just leave it running the whole time
or we'll empty the sea of fish,
so, right now,
it's off.
You can see an output shaft coming
out of the side of the waterwheel.
[Richard] Sticking through that
is a bolt, that's the dog.
It's a dog-clutch.
There's a small shaft out the side
of the bobbin with a slot in it.
When that bobbin moves to the left,
that slot engages with the dog, it turns,
they're locked together.
It's the perfect
clutch for the job.
I thank you.
- [Tory] How do you turn it on?
- You pull the lever.
That's all I needed to know.
[Richard] Oh you know, I thought
you might be interested, it's clever.
All I do is pull this lever?
It's a "leever."
- [Tory] All right.
- Pull it and you'll feel pressure.
[Richard] Here it is.
[Richard] Look at that.
- [Tory] That's cool.
- It totally works!
Oh what a satisfying meaty clunk.
- That is cool!
- And look.
Now we're running, now we're fishing.
[intriguing music]
- Hang on
- It's catching fish.
It's working already!
[upbeat music]
[Richard] Jesus!
[Tory] It's catching a lot!
You'll never have to fish again!
Good job. Well done.
[Tory] This is gonna free up
so much time.
[Richard] Yeah.
[Tory] We can think about other ways
of getting off the island.
[Richard] We can do that,
or we can invent some games
or just enjoy the relaxation.
Let me be clear.
I was not relaxing.
I was cooking up another way
to get us off that damn island.
[light music]
[heavy breathing]
Mate! Two questions.
One, what are you doing?
And two, why does it smell like
festival bogs in this clearing?
- Cause I'm collecting urine.
If you want to be helpful
I could use a little more.
I don't need to go.
- Why do you want it anyway?
- I'm making my reactive compounds.
Wait a minute.
Are you doing exploding stuff?
Potentially.
Oh yeah! That is gold dust
for Hammondland TV, my friend.
Hold fire. I'll get set up.
What's Hammondland TV?
I need this. It's gonna be huge.
What's Hammondland TV?
That's not a thing.
So yeah, I'm an explosion guy.
You guys know that from my shows, right?
No?
Anyway, I figured I could use
my pyrotechnic skills
to make distress flares.
If I made enough of them, I could
set one off every night for two months.
And then someone was bound to see us.
And "Señor" Hammond,
he helped you with this?
Define "help."
Tory!
Tory, Tory!
Welcome to the big time.
- What is that?
- That is my TV studio camera.
We're trying to survive on an island
and all you can think about is making TV.
Let's just put the camera in.
You've gone insane!
Shush. Getting ready to go live.
Standby studio, good luck boys and girls,
let's have a great show.
So excited!
Hello. Welcome to Hammondland TV.
I'm Richard Hammond, but with me
is explosives expert Tory Belleci,
who's going to teach us
how to blow stuff up!
No, no, no.
We're not blowing stuff up today.
Cut! Start again.
What we're going to be doing
is making flares.
They'll go up in the air, make a big
giant bright light, smoke, loud noise,
and that'll help us get rescued.
So it's still kind of explosives then?
Yeah, there's a bit
of an explosive element
but we're not making explosives.
- We're making flares.
- Really big bangs.
[Tory] Distress flares.
[light music]
All right, now, the reason why
I've been collecting urine,
is because I've been making this.
Come here, let me show you.
So, under here,
what I've done is collected
- Oh, that stinks!
- Yes.
[Richard coughing] That is rancid.
[Tory] So, I took hay and chicken poop,
and doused it with our urine.
I know that sounds disgusting
but what's happening is
after all the moisture has evaporated
we've actually created
tiny potassium nitrate crystals.
Chicken poo,
our wee
- And hay. And you just let it sit.
- That's why it smells so bad, but
- Disgusting.
now we have
potassium nitrate crystals.
That is going to be our oxidiser
for our rocket fuel.
Now, we need oxygen. Because
that's what's gonna help burn, right?
More oxygen, more flammable.
If I put a match in there
will it blow up?
No it won't. What we need to do
is add fuel to this.
So what I need you to do
is take that sugar cane
and smash it on a rock.
What we need to do is collect sugar
and then when we add sugar
to the potassium nitrate,
that's when it becomes volatile.
Am I actually making sugar now?
[loud banging]
All that juice
that you're smashing out of there,
once that dries, it makes sugar crystals,
and that's
[muffled] doing a great job
Isn't he doing a great job, folks?
Unbelievable. The commitment.
Got enough. Perfect. Okay so,
I've actually collected sugar juice,
it's dried,
and it's given us sugar crystals.
So what I need you to do now
is take those sugar crystals
and put them in there.
What we're gonna do is mix
the potassium nitrate into that
and then we will have our rocket fuel.
- [Richard laughing]
- Exciting, isn't it?
So yeah, we made rocket fuel.
No big deal.
But rocket fuel only makes
rockets take off.
You want to get noticed,
those rockets need to explode.
What I got here
is three highly reactive metals.
And what's great is that
these 3 different metals,
one's gonna give us a big bright light,
one will give us a red light,
and another will give us
a big cloud of smoke.
So that way when we launch it
into the air and it explodes,
it will grab everyone's attention.
So the key question is,
and the thing we all want to know,
what are those metals?
Can't tell you.
That's the dangerous part.
- [alarm ringing]
- We can't know about that because
Guys, it is Yeah!
Oh, you can't know. It's secret.
Secret stuff here, on HLTV.
[Tory] This is really dangerous.
This could actually blow up in our face
if we mix it wrong.
- Really?
- Yeah.
- Really?
- So just Let's
focus. It's dangerous stuff.
Cool. Right. Carry on.
Don't blow me up.
[tense music]
If this works
and we mixed our chemicals correctly,
when we light that, what we should see
is a giant, red, bright, smoky fireball.
You're gonna look stupid
if it doesn't work.
- You ready?
- Put your things on.
Wait, how far away do I need to be?
- [Richard] I'll stand behind you.
- All right. Here we go. Ready?
I can't see anything. Oh! Oh!
[action music]
[Richard laughing]
[gasping]
That, I would say, is a success.
Yeah!
- Yeah!
- Yes!
[light music]
So you made rocket fuel and explosions.
Then what?
The next stage was to build
some test rockets.
For that I needed more potassium nitrate,
which takes a while to make,
so we kind of just chilled out.
[light music continues]
[Tory] God, it's hot.
- Yes.
- It feels hotter than yesterday.
Yes, I'd noticed that.
- Tory
- Yeah?
Why do we sweat?
Cause you're like losing moisture
just when you need it because it's hot.
To cool off.
I mean, once the wind evaporates
the sweat, you feel cooler.
Because it takes heat away with it.
That is evaporative cooling.
- Mm-hmm.
- Right.
I'm doing a lot of evaporative
cooling right now.
- So am I.
- I'll be like, desiccated.
I'll be a piece
of bacon rind on this chair.
What do you miss
about home right now?
You know, just my loved ones, the people
that are closest to you, I guess.
Other things you miss?
Er God, just like a cold beer.
I would kill for a cold beer.
Oh Now you're talking.
I haven't got a cold beer
but I have got
my homemade Hammondland Hooch.
[soft music]
Ah, you're not making
more hooch?
I'm finishing off the latest
vintage with wax tops.
That last time, that was like
the best night I can't remember.
I just wonder
if it would taste
any better if it was cold?
That my friend is exactly what
I'm standing here pondering.
And you gave me the answer when
we were talking about sweating.
Evaporation.
That's the answer. Evaporation.
Think about this.
We sweat to lose heat,
so, the sweat comes out
and it sits on our skin as a liquid
and it evaporates
so it turns into a gas,
that's what evaporation is.
The same would happen
with my bottle of hooch
if I had that wet on the surface,
that water,
when it was evaporating,
would change state from liquid to gas
and would take heat out of the bottle.
Have you been sampling
some of your hooch?
No, come on, bear with me!
This is a good idea,
this will work, this will cool it.
You could let that evaporate
for hours
and it still would only drop
a couple of degrees.
This is a possibility, okay.
Wait a minute.
I've stored these away.
- [intriguing music]
- [laughing]
- Socks?
- Socks.
- Here's my genius
- Oh boy, here we go.
- Think of a windmill.
- Yeah
A windmill going round
with these on it.
- Oh, like a booze windmill.
- A boozemill.
I love it.
So it goes round,
wets the sock,
sock evaporates its water
into the atmosphere,
with a bit of wind assistance,
in doing so takes a degree or a fraction
of a degree out of the bottle,
gets wet again,
does it again, and again and again,
then you've got
cold hooch in a sock.
- Imagine this, cold!
- Yeah.
Cold hooch.
Oh, looking forward
to going blind again.
That's what I'm gonna do.
I am going to need your help.
Well, count me in.
[light music]
Preparations are well under way for
the ultimate 4th of July party for Tory.
And nothing says Independence Day
like fish burgers.
I just need
to make the bread buns.
A lot of people would say
it's impossible to make bread
on a desert island.
But that's because they haven't
thought of "pain de yucca."
Fortunately, I had.
It was brilliant, and would make
great material for Hammondland TV.
Of course it would.
Hello,
and welcome to Hammondland TV.
Yeah!
Thank you, thank you. I'm Richard Hammond
in front of a live studio audience.
First of all, to make bread,
you need flour.
That's where our friend
the yucca comes in.
Take a slice of yucca here,
wet a stone, this bowl is full of water.
And I'm going to grind it.
You can see,
the water turns milky,
as I'm grinding more and more
of these tiny particles of yucca
on my grind stone here
into the water.
That is the beginning
of my cassava flour.
Water's gone milky.
So
I'm going to boil that water off.
Once the water is gone,
we'll be left with beautiful yucca flour
to make our bread.
The next problem we face once we've got
our flour: we need a rising agent.
I haven't got any yeast.
I haven't got any baking soda.
I'm gonna make it myself.
I've got this, seaweed.
It's in plentiful supply.
And I have burnt it.
That's like a bowl of
crispy burnt seaweed.
And here's the amazing thing
about this seaweed.
With all the sodium
it's soaked up from the sea,
now it's burnt,
I've got sodium carbonate
in there
and if I take a lime,
which is full of citric acid
and I squeeze this citric acid
on to it
You can actually hear that
bubbling as it's releasing CO2,
and it's that that will rise
my bread.
Having boiled away all the water
from my yucca flour water mixture,
I'm left with just pure flour.
So that is the basis for my bread.
Now, I need to throw together
all of my ingredients.
[playful music]
There we are.
So add water to your yucca flour,
seaweed rising agent
and egg white,
and then mix, and that is it.
That is my dough.
I want these for fish burgers so
they want to be
little round shapes like that.
That goes on here
And leave to cook.
Mmm
Welcome back to Hammondland TV
in front of a live studio audience.
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
This is it.
The moment of truth.
Oh yeah, it's worked!
That has risen.
There it is,
my yummy yucca bread!
Oh, it's just
Yeah That is almost too good.
Cut everybody, good show.
Well done.
Well done, everybody.
Thanks. Good work.
And we're out.
Ah, I think I'm gonna throw up.
Well, he'll like them.
[light music]
Ready to make rockets?
Oh yeah!
- Rocket fuel, flash, bang, whallop!
- Yep.
So, we'll start off with the clay,
then we'll fill it up with the sugar mix
and then at the very top,
we'll put in the reactive metal mix.
[intriguing music]
[Richard] So how much energy is in this?
[Tory] Hopefully this will
be enough energy
to launch this thing
100ft in the air.
OK, so now tamp that down.
How hard do I tamp this?
- [knocking]
- Not that hard!
[Tory laughing]
Okay, now I've had a pee.
Will it blow my arm off?
Just be gentle,
don't hit it super hard.
Just be careful.
So it's those three volatile metals
together with the potassium nitrate
that we put in the top
[Tory] Which will give us
that big red smoky fireball.
- So that gives us smoke, flash and bang.
- Yep.
[Richard] And the rocket fuel beneath
- Gives us lift.
- Wakes Mr Newton up and says,
here, break out your 3rd, would you?
- Yep.
Equal and opposite reaction, matter
going that way, thrust going that way
[Tory] Just think about it,
we're going to have
our own distress flares,
this is going to get us off
the island, do you realise that?
Now
tie the stick to the bamboo,
and, there you have it, our flares.
So when do we test these out?
We can test them now.
[laughing]
[military music]
This is very exciting.
- You're excited, aren't you?
- I'm so excited.
Oh man, if this works,
how cool is this going to be?
[Richard] You love this.
I do.
This is the happiest
I've seen you in weeks.
Well, we're blowing stuff up.
It's kind of hard not to smile.
I just hope they work.
- Are we going to die?
- No.
All right.
You wanna light it?
Nervous?
You do the lighting
and I'll do the running away.
Here we go.
Fire in the hole!
[Richard] Run.
Let's see if our rockets work!
[suspenseful music]
- [Tory] Oh, this is very exciting.
- Isn't it?
[Tory] This might be the key
to getting us rescued.
[upbeat music]
[Richard] Wow!
[Tory shouting]
- Oh wow!
- Yes!
Respect.
- That is amazing.
- We did it.
They worked.
Oh my gosh,
this is such good news!
Now all we need to do
is make 50 of them.
What?
Yeah. We need a lot.
- 50?
- What's wrong with that?
That's a massive job.
This is going to help us get off
the island, you realise that, right?
[light music]
Yes!
This is the best day ever!
I made flares and they worked!
They look beautiful
and they're going to be seen for miles.
It's so nice to be blowing
stuff up again.
I'm going to get us off this island,
just you wait and see!
[American hymn]
[Richard] Right, so it was
the 4th of July
and I had two priorities.
One: make ice cold beer.
Two: make sure Tory didn't find out
I was planning a party.
[Richard] Ready to receive.
[Tory] Ready to insert.
Push Just straight in.
Too far. Come back.
- Yes.
- Push it up a bit.
I think you might need to lift it
- [Richard] No, come on
- Hit it harder.
Thank you, professor.
[Tory] You're not using
a square peg, are you?
[Tory laughing]
Square peg in a round hole
[upbeat music]
- Get it.
- Got it.
[Richard] We are nearly there.
All right, last one.
[Richard] Boom.
[Tory sighing]
So now we attach the bottles,
thanks to this piece of genius,
as it turns Watch.
There's a little cam up there,
it'll cam over, and squirt.
[Tory] That's pretty cool!
[Richard] So every rotation
gets made wetter.
[Tory] It squirts out a little
water onto our socks.
[Richard] Rotate
[Tory] Woohoo!
This will work so much better than if we
just put it into a bucket of cold water.
All you're going to do is equalise
the temperatures, aren't you?
So the cold water will draw heat
out of this until they match.
So all you'll do is fractionally
heat up the bucket of water
and fractionally cool this.
[Richard] Right.
That sits on there.
- Let's see if it works.
- Yeah.
[soft music]
[Tory] Hey, look at that!
We made a windmill!
It's fantastic.
Wow
It's really going now. All right.
I'm excited. I'm excited
to drink more of your hooch.
Looking forward
to those headaches.
I'll hang the rest of the bottles
and you go and have a lie down.
I should have known
something weird was going on
Richard had never even let me
into his room and now he was insisting
that I use his bed.
[soft music]
- Why are you being so nice to me?
- Because I care.
- I can tell you're feeling tired.
- I have not slept very well.
Just escape into blissful sleep.
It's comfy in there.
Oh, wow!
I love what you've
done with the place.
Just lie down,
get your head down.
There, feeling better already.
Oh my God, it's so much more
comfortable than the hammock.
Okay.
- Sleep well, my American friend.
- So soft.
So soft
[Richard] Night night.
The boozemill
is going to be brilliant.
It is going to work.
We haven't had cool drinks,
in forever.
And the thing is, come with me
He's gone to bed.
He'll be asleep right now
and he has no idea why I'm suddenly
doing all of this for him.
So I've got to get things ready for his
massive surprise Independence Day party.
He's gonna love it.
[light music]
[Richard] Surprise partner!
Woah, what are
you talking like that for?
It's the 4th of July!
Happy Independence Day!
Yeah!
I know how much that matters
to you Americans,
and how much
you're missing home
so I have brought a little bit of the ole
US of the ole A to the ole island.
- You're scaring me.
- Look what I've done!
Look out there! Behold.
Oh yeah, this is all for you.
Come on.
- [American hymn]
- [Tory] Oh my God!
Yeah! It's your own
Independence Day theme park.
[upbeat music]
- [Tory] Oh my God!
- The place just feels alive, doesn't it?
- This is crazy!
- Oh yeah!
- You built all this?
- For you.
Have a beer my friend,
let's go explore, there's lots to see.
Come on.
Come on, this way
to the first attraction.
There it is,
it's the US equivalent of chess.
First things first, let's get
you equipped with a cold drink.
- Hey, it worked!
- Yeah.
- It's actually cold.
- Yeah.
How does it taste?
Oh, it goes down smooth.
You'll have played this a million times.
Throw those at the thing.
I love it.
- [Richard] Oh genius! Max points!
- Boom!
This would not be a 4th of July carnival
funfair theme park experience
without a "Test your strength" machine.
- Feeling strong?
- Oh that's cool.
Stamp on the board,
coconut hits frying pan
Everybody admires you.
- Right.
- Stand back. Here we go.
- [Richard] Bang!
- [Tory shouting merrily]
And now, Mr Belleci,
a game of skill, judgement and cunning!
The coconut shy! Do it!
Oh you're pitching,
this is so American!
Everyone is a winner!
What do I win?
You win a fish burger!
Step right up, fish burgers dollar a pop
or free to prize winners.
- Hello, sir.
- Hello.
- I just won on the coconut toss.
- You're a winner.
- Yes, I am.
- Then you sir need a fish burger.
What?
- It's a meaty bite, isn't it?
- Yeah
That's got substance!
It's got a flavour.
Really? And it tasted good?
No. It was the most disgusting
thing I have ever eaten.
And they just kept coming and coming.
[dramatic music]
[Tory] I was gonna throw up
well before he served up
his final surprise.
[circus music]
- Step right up.
- Oh my God, what is it?
Behold!
That my friend is
this carnival's star attraction.
The big one, the main event.
- [Tory] Is it a ride?
- Oh, yeah.
It's a 360 degree swing.
Oh, cool.
It's kind of like a Russian swing.
On this I've added a counter-weight,
at an equal distance from the fulcrum
so just as you're running
out of momentum,
gravity on the counter-weight
takes over and ping!
Over you go!
What a feeling!
- How fast does it go?
- As fast as you like, mate.
What?
Scream if you want to go faster.
Or even if you don't.
- And it's safe?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
All right, like, what if I want to stop,
do you have a brake system?
If I want to stop, how do I get off?
Let's not think about stopping,
let's think about going.
- That is awesome.
- Yes.
Let's do it tomorrow.
We're doing this now.
I just don't feel
just don't feel great.
- Are you a bit scared?
- I don't feel great.
A little bit scared?
You're supposed to be scared.
It's a ride.
All right, let's go for a ride.
- You're not going to kill me?
- No.
- You're not trying to kill me?
- No.
I feel like you're trying to kill me.
- So what, I just strap in here?
- Yeah, you strap in there.
And hold on pretty tight.
Yeah.
Bit of trouble with the old legs there,
they're wobbling with fear.
- You're scared.
- No, it's your hooch.
- It's like before a roller-coaster.
- It's the hooch.
- "Oh, will I be okay?"
- Shut up.
Your majesty, are you ready
for the ride of a lifetime?
[majestic music]
Ready? Everyone's gonna love you.
Have a brilliant time.
- Ride!
- [Tory screaming]
Oh yeah!
- [screaming continues]
- Oh, it's graceful! Oh look at that!
I'm gonna die!
Oh here it comes!
Where are the brakes?
- Can you slow it down?
- Not really.
Any minute now, your momentum
combined with the counter-weight
will overcome gravity
and you will go over the top.
- [screaming continues]
- It's getting closer I feel.
Here you go! You've done 360!
[Richard] Yeah!
[Richard laughing]
- That must feel amazing.
- Oh my God!
Richard let me down! Let me down!
I've got one more surprise.
- A grand finale!
- Richard!
- This you're gonna love.
- Richard, no seriously,
can you please slow this down?
It's going too fast.
[Richard] Look at that!
[majestic music continues]
[Tory] My flares!
My flares, Richard!
Happy Independence Day!
- What are you doing?
- It's beautiful!
Those are my flares!
Get me off this thing!
Oh, what a show!
What a night!
Makes me misty-eyed
just thinking about it.
And "Señor" Belleci, did he like it?
Err
How could you?
You know how long I worked
on those flares! How could you, Richard?
[Richard] Smile!
Happiest day of your life.
- You piece of
- [loud bang]
It's amazing!
- You son of a
- [loud bang]
That is one happy customer.
You must promise to tell your friends
how much fun it was.
- You
- [loud bang]
[majestic music continues]
Why would you do that, Richard?
You're never gonna forget this one.
When I get down from here,
I'm going to kill you.
[Tory screaming] I'm gonna kill you!
[majestic music]