The L Word s01e04 Episode Script

I told you, don't move.
Let your, um, let your arms fall by your sides.
That's beautiful.
Oh, god damn it.
What? I thought you set the alarm.
I did, you snoozed it.
I'm late for my fucking dumb-ass job.
I'm sorry.
Fuck.
Do you want me to make us coffee? No, thanks, I'll get some on the way.
So are we gonna get together later or what? I have a screening with Joanie.
But I'll call you.
Bye Ho tanto da fare oggi.
(I'm really busy today) Hey.
Can I speak to you please? Sure.
I'll be right there.
Wait a minute? Due bicchieri d'acqua per la tre.
(Two glasses of water for table 3) Do you want some coffee? No.
Thank you.
Finally, "The Flagellation" by Dalmas Howe deals with the dichotomy between man as divine and man as creature.
The painting, which is large in scale and classical in its execution attempts to record the artist's experiences through juxtaposition in narrative.
Richard Morrisey has called this piece "a revelation.
" "Provocations" is intended to do just that: Provoke.
It is daring, it is intense, and it is the edge we have been looking for.
And with a little finessing, it will be the C.
A.
C.
's spring exhibition.
Isn't that our slot for the impressionists? Yes, but we've show "Impressions in Winter" for the last 5 years in a row.
I thought this year we would wow them with something different.
We can't move the impressionists.
Everybody loves the impressionists.
Well, the impressionists notwithstanding, you hired me to create a new profile for the C.
A.
C.
Now, the "Provocations" exhibit will put us on the map.
It premieres at Mona in New York, then after the C.
A.
C.
it moves on to the Walker and then to London's Tate Modern.
Okay, well just assuming for a moment that we were willing to forego "Impressions in Winter", despite the fact that it's our most popular exhibit bar none, uh, for this, cause celebre out of New York.
What makes you think you can procure it for the C.
A.
C.
? Well, I've set up a meeting with Gina Ferrara, who is the curator of the Peggy Peabody collection.
I know that both MOCA and LACMA are after it, but I'm completely confident that I can talk - Bette, it is obvious that you have gone to a great deal of trouble to prepare for this presentation.
But, it isn't worth the risk.
"Impressions in Winter" is is too important to us.
With all due respect, Franklin if I'm not the one selecting the shows, then I don't understand what I'm here for.
To do what's best for the C.
A.
C.
I would think that would be fairly obvious.
Now what I need you to do is to follow up with Sheldon Tomlin over at Hoyt and iron out the details.
We wouldn't want one of our rivals running off with "Impressions" because we were a little slow on the uptake, now would we? Wait, wait, wait, I'm sorry.
Follow up? Yeah.
You've booked it already? I, uh, happened to have lunch with Shelly last week and I I thought I'd save you the time.
Well, everyone, thanks, and uh, how 'bout, uh, thanking Miss Porter for all her hard work.
Great job! Do you want to go to my office? No.
This is just gonna take a minute.
Hey! How are ya? Hey! Hey Jenny! Can we go into your office, please? Yeah, sure.
Thank you.
Okay.
Shane.
Hey, Jenny, how are you? Whatever.
Can we have our table? Did you see that? You can't tell me, right? Right, Al, I can't tell you.
What's on your mind, Jenny? I can't be around you.
Anymore.
It's confusing to me and it makes me feel insane.
You know, Tim has been so wonderful to me.
And I think this is the very first time in my life that I've actually felt safe.
Do you want to be safe? I'm gonna marry Tim.
I can't imagine my life without him.
I don't want to imagine my life without him.
Is that what you want? Yes.
That is what I want.
Then I wish you well.
I'm gonna get another, you okay? Hey Gabby, you're so fine, you're so fine you blow my mind Easy with the 80s pop this early in the morning.
Hey Gabby, hey Gabby.
Tell me you didn't.
Okay.
Think what you will, she's amazing.
She's amazing-looking, she's amazingly smart, she's amazing in bed.
She treats you like shit.
No, she doesn't.
She does.
No, not this time.
Totally changed.
I don't know, Alice, she still seems pretty cold in the streets to me.
Cold in the streets, hot in the sheets.
She's happier! She's writing her lesbian cops screenplay.
She's a whole new Gabby.
What? Nothing, nothing.
No, no, no, not saying "nothing" with that face.
Allright, let - let's say hypothetically that I saw Gabby all over Nadia Miertschin on Thursday night.
Where? Milk.
What were they doing? I I'd prefer not to give you the details this time.
Hey Hey! Oh, my god! Oh - oh, my god, I'm sorry, I - It's okay.
Ah, Jesus, you're disfigured! I'm not disfigured.
But I could've killed you! When you were you know It happens all the time.
Well, should we call a doctor - Dana! Second-degree burn from the béchamel sauce.
Run-away shish-kabob.
An attack from a particularly hostile live lobster, and, um, electric can-opener.
Is there anything I can do? You could kiss it and make it better.
I was wondering if maybe some - I would love to.
Really? Okay.
Okay! Is Thursday night okay? Thursday night is great.
Where do you wanna go? Anywhere you're going.
Yeah, but you're a food person.
So, I want to take you someplace really good.
Like L'Orangerie.
No, no, no, that's way too expensive.
I know.
I'll take care of it.
We're not starting out that way.
There's - there's this little place in Koreatown that I've been dying to check out.
Do I need to make a reservation? How about if I take care of that part, and you just pick me up at 8? Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay.
Okay, bye.
Hey! Yeah? Thanks for asking me out.
Oh yeah, no problem.
Yeah, Gina Ferrara please, it's Bette Porter.
We're having drinks.
No, can you just let her know that I got her message and the Four Seasons is fine? You brought dinner.
You going out? I have a drinks meeting.
The board didn't go for it.
What? Hello, is Greg Massey in? Yeah, it's Bette Porter from the C.
A.
C.
Yes, I'll hold.
No - can you just, uh, have him call me back, please.
Thanks.
I hate them all.
They didn't go for "Provocations"? Yah, and then to pour salt on the wound, Franklin went behind my back and booked "Impressions in Winter.
" So, who're you having drinks with? Gina Ferrara, the curator of the Peggy Peabody collection.
I thought you said they didn't go for it? I'm not rolling over.
Right after the meeting, I called Sheldon Tomlin, and I unbooked the impressionists show, and now I'm gonna go prostrate myself to a woman who hates my guts.
Why does Gina Ferrara hate you? We had a run-in over an artist, Megan Friedman, when we were both gallerists.
That sculptor you slept with? And she's hated me ever since.
So Gina Ferrara is a lesbian.
No she wanted the show, I got it, and now she hates me.
But, I am gonna kiss her ass.
She's lucky.
Hey Jen.
Hey, it's me, listen.
I had a really shitty day.
Uh, my 200 yard free relay team ate some bad sushi, they were up all night puking.
Trish is now officially on academic probation, so, if you get the message, I'm at The Planet, I miss you, I hope you join me.
Bye.
Anyone else? C'mon.
No.
Come on.
No, I'm obviously no match for you.
Well, you never know until you try.
Hey! Hi! How are ya? You know Nadia.
Yeah, hey! Hey.
Oh, my god.
Have you seen this? Lacey.
Looks like Shane finally tangled with the wrong crazy bitch.
There's like a whole stack of them over by the door.
Gabby? Gabby.
I was kind of hoping we could be alone.
We can be alone with we're dead.
Is that Fiona over there? I can't believe she'd even show her face in here.
Tim.
Tim! Your phone is ringing.
Can you get it? Hello? Tim? Who is this? Hi Jenny.
It's Marina.
Where's Tim? Yeah, Tim is playing pool, he asked me to answer the phone.
I don't think she's happy.
Jenny? She got cut off.
I guess she'll call back.
Yesss! Did you just hustle me? Yesss! Jen! Hey! You okay? Jenny? Jenny, what's going on? Jenny, can you hear me? Jenny, baby, can you hear me? Can you hear what I'm saying? Everybody, get back, give her some air.
She's coming around.
I gotta get her something for her head.
Jen.
Hey.
It's okay.
It's allright.
It's okay.
What happened to her? She passed out.
Was she drinking or something? I don't know.
But somebody else was.
You're kidding.
Why didn't you stop her? It's not my place.
How was your meeting? There was an accident on La Cienega, I got there 15 minutes late, she'd left already.
Oh, babe.
I'm sorry.
We're going to reschedule tomorrow.
C'mon.
Let's get you something to eat.
Well, we're definitely getting you in to a doctor tomorrow.
It's low blood sugar.
You scared me, you know.
Well, you know, you fucked everything up because you decided to go to The Planet while I was making you dinner, and go and flirt with Marina.
Don't be ridiculous.
Well, what were you doing, Tim? Playing pool.
With your arms around each other.
You know, that's exactly right.
We were making out right there in the middle of The Planet while everyone was watching.
You need to get some sleep.
Bette Porter's office.
Hi James, it's me.
Can you just, uh, forward my calls to my cell? Thanks.
Hey guys, check this out.
Oh, my god, it's the Unabomber.
What's going on? Lacey is on some sort of rampage.
She's putting these all over town.
You guys, you guys, there's a giant billboard of Shane on Sunset.
Just kidding.
So how's your lady friend? Good.
I have my date tonight! Oh, my god, Dana's got a date.
What are you wearing? Well, I was thinking of wearing that - that blue sundress, you know Nooo.
No.
What! How many times do I have to tell you no sundresses? But I'm going to a nice play, y'know, somebody might see me.
One guy recognizes you, and all of a sudden you're like Tiger Woods.
Bite my head off, god Jesus, Al, it's not Dana's fault Gabby's macking on Nadia Miertschin.
Oh, god, Nadia Miertschin, I hate that girl.
I've been introduced to her, like, 24 times and she never remembers my name.
Didn't she try to hit up on you once, Nadia Miertschin? She was drunk.
Still It has to end.
But seriously, Alice, you can't let Gabby continue to treat you this way.
You guys don't know her.
I know it looks like she's treating me like shit, but it's - she's just, y'know - Treating you like shit, Al.
Maybe.
It's just - No.
It's just you deserve better.
I do? Allright, I do.
But I just feel like at times, y'know, she's, like, so right there, and I feel like we connect and then, all of a sudden, she acts like I don't even exist.
That's because she's an emotional cripple.
Yeah.
Emotional cripple slash narcissistic personality disorder.
And the next time she calls you? You have to end it.
I know.
It's just - It's just nothing.
What are you gonna do? Well, I was gonna ask her - No asking.
What are you gonna tell her? You're gonna say, "Gabby, I really enjoy the time we've spent together, but it is obvious to me that we are in different places in our lives and we want different things out of a relationship, and I respect myself too much to let you continue to treat me this way.
" "It's clear to me now that you are an emotional cripple without any kind of capacity to understand true love.
" "And I'm no longer willing to waste my valuable time on you.
" "So step off, bitch!" You can do it! Hello? Gina! Hey! I am so sorry about last night.
I hope you got the message, there was this terrible accident Yeah.
I'm really looking forward to talking to you about "Provocations," I think that the Oh really? Well, is there any way that I could get you to reconsider because I think that the C.
A.
C.
Okay.
Allright.
No, no, no, no, thank you.
Bye.
What happened? "Provocations" went to MOCA.
That's where Gina was last night while I was sitting alone at the bar at The Four Seasons.
Oh, baby, I'm so sorry.
I knew Gina would screw me.
I am so fucked.
Is there anyone who can overrule her? Just Peggy Peabody, the billionairess raving lunatic.
Peggy Peabody? Unified Steel heiress? Yeah.
She's in town, y'know.
She's staying at the Las Alemendros, Santa Barbara.
She's on some crazy art-buying spree.
Spent like $6.
3 million bucks yesterday.
How do you know all of this? I was eavesdropping at L.
A.
Magazine.
Do you guys know they want me to do a story on the 45-minute orgasm? As if? I mean, by definition, there's short and intense, right? Bette Porter's office.
Hi, James? Can you, uh, get me directions for the Los Alamendros in Santa Barbara? Franklin found out you passed on "Impressions in Winter".
What else? Well, he's in a rage that you left the office in a time of crisis.
Tell him to bite me.
I don't think I can say that.
You know, tell him that all great art is a response to small-minded, corporate fascists trying to impose their ignorance on the sheep-like masses.
Why don't I just tell him you have a dentist appointment? Just tell him it's not over until it's over.
Okay, call me back with the directions.
Thanks.
You're going to Santa Barbara? Good luck.
Hi, how are you? Hey, how ya doing? Hey, word to the wise, watch out for that woman.
Ma'am, how're you doing, keep an eye on your daughter, you never know.
Hi.
Heads up.
So what do you think? I learned Photoshop.
Lace, what are you doing? Whatever I feel like.
Isn't that what you do? Allright.
Enough.
C'mon.
I think we have a big misunderstanding.
I mean, you and me had a really great time together, but - I know, that's why I don't understand what happened.
Babe, nothing happened.
Okay? It's just about having a good time and enjoying each other's company.
I know, but then you went off with the other girl.
Yeah.
I don't see what the problem is with that.
Look, Lace, you're beautiful.
And I like you a lot.
But I like a lot of people.
What does she have that I don't have? Nothing.
It's not about having something or not having something.
Did you like fucking her better? No.
Because I really liked fucking you.
Yeah, I liked fucking you, too, Lace.
So then, what's the problem? I don't do relationships.
I'm not asking for a relationship.
W - wait - don't hey, don't cry.
I am not crying.
Yes, you are I hate it when girls cry, allright? C'mere.
C'mere.
I just really like you, is all.
Yeah, I like you, too.
I do.
I guess I got carried away with the posters and fliers and the banner.
You, you mean - you made banners? Just one.
But they wouldn't let me hang it at Girl Bar.
Honey, you have a lot of feelings.
I know, but then you went off with the other girl! No, no, no, shhh don't, don't, please, don't, don't Forget about it, okay, don't even think about that.
I don't want a relationship with you, I just want to be with you all the time.
Oh, hey, oh Oh, I am so dumb.
I am always doing this.
I just want to know why everybody always abandons me.
Wait, no one's abandoning you.
Everybody leaves.
My father left when I was 5.
My mom died.
My sister What happened with your sister? She moved to West Covina.
I'm not going anywhere, okay? I'm not going anywhere.
Okay? Okay.
Yeah? Yeah.
Allright? Al, it's Dana.
Al.
Alice! Don't worry, I'm wearing pants.
No, they're not patterned.
Look, I'll call you after, okay? I'm not gonna have - hold on.
Just hold on.
I'll be right down.
Okay, look, she's coming, I gotta go.
No, I'm not going to have sex with her tonight, it's our first date, god! I'll call you later, bye.
Hi.
I overdressed.
No, no Oh, god, I feel like such a geek.
No, no, I my friends made me wear this.
What? My friends said that they thought that you would think I was a geek if, you know, if I wore a dress.
So, I am a geek.
No, I'm a geek.
For letting my friends tell me what to wear.
Well, I could go change so you don't feel so geeky.
No, you look beautiful.
Oh, god, see? That was totally I'm just a total geek.
I'm just - Shall we go? Yeah.
Thank you Sir.
Hello, and welcome to Los Alamendros.
How may I help you? Yes, I'm here to see Mrs.
Peabody.
The code word? You need a secret code to see Peggy Peabody? That's correct.
Shazam Perhaps you'd like to leave a note? That's her, isn't it? Right? Mrs.
Peabody? Mrs.
Peabody? Hi Well.
My driver was late.
That's my excuse, and it's going to have to stand.
You have so much traffic in this infernal city, I don't know how you stand it.
Well, you get used to it, actually.
Absurd.
Penthouse.
C'mere.
Hold him for me, would you? Go away! Don't come back! I let José off.
José? Well, he's my helper.
He's in love with this girl who works for the Weintraubs.
Or is it the Fleischmans, I'm not certain.
Mad, obsessive love! I told him, "Go! Be in love! Take the night, show her the sea.
" I think people in love should see the sea.
Mrs.
Peabody, I'm - Oh, call me Peggy.
I don't like "Mrs.
", it's so frumpy.
Like I'm an old mare.
Peggy You're here about the Kandinsky.
Kandinsky? What're you drinking? Um, nothing, I'm fine.
Nonsense.
I had this ridiculous drink the other night.
José made it for me.
Mango juice and vodka, I think.
Just ridiculous.
José! I think José is out.
At the sea.
Of course.
He's in love.
Right! Now.
This drink has a very salutary effect.
It's called "Roadkill.
" See if you like it.
Yum.
Mm! Delicious! So, when can I see it? See what? The Kandinsky.
You have a reputation for driving a very hard bargain, Miss Reynolds.
I think you have me confused with someone - But I will have it.
I - I'm afraid that you have me confused with - How does this damned thing work.
Oh! Nasty little machine.
This is Miss Peabody's room.
Leave a message at the tone.
Hi Peggy.
This is Abby Reynolds.
I'm so sorry, but I'm going to have to cancel on our appointment this evening.
Let's reschedule the talk about the Kandinsky.
Who the hell are you? I've been trying to tell you I'm I'm Bette Porter, and I am the director of the California Arts Center.
California oh.
Oh, yes, that little museum in Bergamot Station.
Right.
Obscure.
And that will all change, soon.
Especially if you, in your infinite wisdom, decide that the "Provocations" exhibit should go - You're the lesbian! Excuse me? The lesbian museum director.
I'm sorry I was a lesbian in 1974.
Just 1974? Just 1974.
That was all I needed.
Well, you know, that is what we refer to as a "has-bian.
" A "has-bian".
That's hilarious! I must tell Joanne that one.
Are you hungry? I'm just famished! Why don't you order us something from the menu here.
Thank you.
Hey, stranger! You ran out the other night.
Yeah, uh, well, twelve's a crowd.
I know, and I'm so sorry, it was just that I missed Clarissa's birthday the other night, and then Nadia called, and then before I knew it, it was like a whole, big, you know - I know about you and Nadia.
There's nothing to know.
Half of Hollywood saw you guys making out.
That was nothing.
Alice, it meant nothing to me.
Ok, here's you and here's the lies you're telling me Okay.
I won't see her anymore.
Swear.
It's just, I - You and me are really good together.
We're both writers, we're on an intellectual par I can't have the same kind of conversations with Nadia that I have with you.
Gabby I've really enjoyed the time we've spent together.
But, it's obvious you and I are on two different levels, and we really want two different things out of a relationship.
I respect myself too much to let you treat me like this.
Are you serious? And it's pretty clear you're like some sort of an emotional cripple without the capacity to understand true love, and I, uh I I'm not gonna let you waste my valuable time, and, uh Step off, bitch.
Emotional cripple, where'd you get that? "Dr.
Phil"? Why don't you get out of my house.
What ev'! Suit yourself.
But I think you should know, Alice, this is not a good move for someone like you.
Everyone knows you're desperate.
I'm not gonna bounce back from this.
Oh, hey! Hey.
I just wanted to see how you were doing.
Good, good, good.
Are you working? I don't want to bother you if you're working.
No, no.
I haven't really, uh I haven't been able to focus.
But I'm - I'm doing good.
No more dizziness? Mm-mm, no.
I don't know what happened, I was just sort of standing there, watching Tim, and Marina.
Marina.
Y'know, Jenny, I know it's none of my business, but, I wanted to tell you that if you wanted to talk to someone about anything you can talk to me if you want to.
I know, um how intense this can be.
Keeping it pent-up can make it worse.
It's no wonder you passed out.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
Hey Did uh Did did Marina say something to you? No.
She didn't.
Look, I know it doesn't seem this way, but this can be a small town.
Sometimes it's Okay.
Because, you know, whatever you heard, it's just it's a lie, you know.
It's just a rumor.
The lesbian community can just be a hotbed of rumor and innuendo.
I mean, you could look at someone and Okay.
If Marina confided in someone, I'm sure it was just as simple as saying she was attracted to you, and I just can't believe she did that, you know I I didn't say she did.
I Thank you.
just saying word travels.
Thank you very much.
Photography is my new passion.
I bought a Salvador Dali etching this week, and a Duchamp.
But my favorite purchase, by far, is my new Carla Marie Freed.
Oh, god, she was brilliant.
She was completely brilliant.
Poor, wretched addict.
What is your favorite Carla Marie Freed photograph? That's, just, that's so difficult, I Oh, please, don't be such a pussy.
Favorite Carla Marie Freed photograph, post haste! I - I would ha - I would have to say, it - it's "The Last Time I and You" I've never seen the original.
I mean, she destroyed all of her negs, you know.
Even the reproductions are just I mean, she photographed the same woman for 12 years.
Can you imagine that? I mean, you - can you imagine that act of looking.
Looking, and seeing, and re-seeing.
Just to try to get to the truth of someone.
Y'know, I mean, there is incredible mystery, and - and passion in that work.
You know? I met her just before she died.
Yeah, it was in some little bistro in New York.
She was high as a kite.
And, you know, I was introduced to her, and uh she told me to go fuck myself.
I totally loved her.
Oh, that's funny.
Just loved her.
Loved her.
C'mere.
Follow me.
Close your eyes.
Keep them closed! Open 'em.
I'm so happy.
Where you going? You promised.
Allright.
See ya.
Be good, okay? You can't imagine how jealous I am of you right now.
You've been waiting to burst into tears and make a complete fool of yourself? You - you know Stendahl? The French art critic.
He went to Florence.
He saw the Caravaggio.
And then he burst into tears, and then he fainted.
The work of art was so beautiful and moving, he couldn't withstand the impact.
The "Stendahl Syndrome".
"My head thrown back, I let my gaze dwell on the ceiling.
I underwent the profoundest experience of ecstacy I had ever encountered.
" "I had obtained that supreme degree of sensibility where the divine intimations of art merge with the impassioned sensuality of emotion.
" You have utterly exhausted me.
I have to go to sleep.
Mrs.
Peabody - Peggy "Provocations" - is there any way that I could persuade you to I hired Gina Ferrara to do that job.
I know you would hate it if your employers interfered with your autonomy, running your little museum.
Why would Why would you do that? Are you trying to hurt me? How did I hurt you, Jenny? Because you told someone.
Everybody knows.
Some people guessed from the way you were behaving.
Listen.
I can't hurt Tim.
Okay? I understand.
I don't know what to do.
Everytime I look at you, I I feel so completely dismantled.