The Villains Of Valley View (2022) s01e04 Episode Script

Thanks for your help, Celia.
I can't imagine what could've caused
the garbage disposal to back up.
I can.
Who's been shoving their
unpaid parking tickets in here?
Hey, don't look at me!
I don't even have a license!
That hasn't stopped you from driving.
Or flying the occasional 747.
I don't have a license either.
DMV revoked mine for drag racing.
Okay. Enough work, Grandma.
It's Mother's Day
weekend. Time to relax.
Getting the crud out
of pipes is how I relax.
This sucker's gonna need a longer snake.
Better get the 15-footer.
Hey, I need your help.
I can't think of a gift to get
my grandma for Mother's Day.
Just get her something
you know she'll use.
Like a nightgown or a hatchet.
What's this about a day
of mothers getting gifts?
And more importantly,
when do I get mine?
Sunday.
Wait. Don't villains celebrate holidays?
The only holiday we had was Onyx Day.
Which we celebrated
by bowing to our leader
and showering him with gifts.
Good thing it was only once a year.
It was every day.
Well, I'm a mother
and also the leader of this family,
so I should be entitled to
the same benefits as Onyx!
Actually, Mother's Day is more
about spending time with family
and honoring the importance
of a mother's love.
Yeah, I prefer the gifts.
We don't have any money.
Oh, that sounds like a you problem.
So whoever bestows upon me
the best gift, is
winner of Mother's Day.
And the losers?
And the losers get to spin my
wheel of torment.
I thought you left your
wheel in the old lair.
Ooh, I made a new one.
Wow, this oughta be fun to watch, huh?
- You're getting me a gift, too.
- Worth a shot.
Morning.
Colbs,
is that helmet still stuck on your head?
Yup.
He's been it so long,
I kinda forgot what he looks like.
I'm starting to get worried.
That I'll starve?
No. That you won't be able to
find me a Mother's Day gift.
Should I bring sticky notes? No.
Markers? No.
Scissors? No.
Let's go, Locker-Blocker!
If I'm gonna be late for class
I want it to be my choice!
And to think people say
you have rage issues.
I'm just stressed about
this Mother's Day gift.
It's not just about the wheel.
I've never got Mom a gift before
and I want it to be special.
Yeah, special works for normal moms,
our mom is the most petty,
vindictive, grudge-holding
grouch on the planet.
Yeah. That's why she's my hero.
Should I bring the stapler?
I don't need it, but I do like
a little weight in my backpack.
Seriously, can you move?
I'd like to get to my locker
before the end of the school year.
Be done in a jiffy.
I've yet to decide whether I need
black or blue gel pens.
Or maybe I'll get crazy and go with red.
It is Friday. Woop-woop!
Amy, guess what!
I found a collector in town
who claims to have the
most impressive collection
of superhero memorabilia
in the entire country!
Superhero stuff? Sweet!
Where is it and how fast
can I get a wood chipper?
Or, for Mother's Day,
you can get your mom
the broken superhero mask
she blasted off Monarch's face
in the epic "Clash on
Centropolis Bridge."
No way! Monarch's, like,
my mom's biggest nemesis!
And giving her that mask
would be like a battle trophy.
This is the perfect gift.
Exactly!
I think you just helped me win
my family's sick and
twisted gift challenge.
You're such a good friend.
thing you've ever said to me.
I know, it felt weird. Let's move on.
Who knew Mother's Day shopping
could work up such an appetite?
I think I'm gonna splurge
and get a ten-pound steak.
Uh-uh.
We need to save our
money for Mom's gift,
so fill up on the free biscuits.
So far, I've got a sparkly cowboy hat,
and a belt buckle with
the cutest armadillo.
But these are for me,
what am I getting your mom?
Come on, let's focus.
What would Mom want more than anything?
A mechanical bull.
Okay, I don't think
that will fit in the car.
No! Look!
"Best rider wins $500."
With your super-strength, you
can totally win that prize money
and then we can partner up
and get Mom one big gift,
and neither one of us will
have to spin the wheel!
I thought the whole point of hiding
was not to use our powers in public.
Well, that's the beauty of it.
Everyone will think
you're a gifted bull rider.
They'll have no idea
you're the fifth-best
supervillain in town!
Yeah. Guess it couldn't hurt
to give these babies a little playdate.
If there's a Father's Day,
please give me the gift
of never doing that again.
Okay, this is the showroom.
Really? Where's the mask?
And what superhero owned
a stackable washer-dryer?
Greetings, prospective buyers.
Welcome to my menagerie of memorabilia.
Wait a minute.
I knew it. Locker-Blocker!
The name's Milo.
Was that not clear from the patch
my mom embroidered on my hoodie?
You're the collector?
I prefer the term
curator of superhero accoutrement.
- Wow!
- Ew.
How did you get Flame Fatale's Whip?
Let's just say my dad
is pretty influential
in the superhero world.
Is he one of the Masters of the Realm?
No. But he does their taxes.
We're looking for Monarch's mask.
The one Surge broke
on Centropolis Bridge.
Excellent taste!
Unfortunately, I've already sold that,
but I do have another piece
procured from that same battle
Surge's Electron Accelerator Belt!
No way!
My mom loved that belt!
She was devastated when she lost it.
- I'll take it.
- Great.
That'll be $1200.
What? I don't have that kind of money.
Well then, you're barking
up the wrong superhero tree.
Sorry, ladies, this is a
high-class establishment.
Dad! I'm with a client!
Look, if you're not
here to drop dollars,
don't waste my time.
Now, if you'll excuse me,
I have to massage my
superhero suits with baby oil.
To keep the leather soft?
Sure.
Oh, well, we tried.
I'm sure we can find your
mom another nice gift.
No, there's no way I'm leaving here
without the belt. Look what she sent me.
Hi, sweetie.
Just a reminder that if
you come home empty-handed,
you could win a night locked in a coffin
with a hungry raccoon.
Two go in. One comes out!
Bye!
Ahh!
- Yikes.
- I know. She's so twisted.
Which is why she
deserves the perfect gift.
Too bad you don't have enough money.
Maybe I don't need money.
Oh. Don't tell me you're
just going to take it.
Okay, I won't tell you.
I don't want to do this.
I do not want to do this.
Why are you freaking
out? He has so much junk.
- He won't even notice if I stea
- Shh!
I've never been a bystander
to someone "s" wording before!
Okay, technically I'm not
"s" wording.
That belt was my mom's.
And I'm just returning
it to its rightful owner.
I really want to get it back for her.
And I need your help.
Please.
Okay, I'm in.
Great. You distract
Milo, I'll get the belt.
Hi.
What's up?
My friend is cheap.
But I'm not.
And I'm ready to splurge.
Starting with this superhero suit
oh Oh!
I'm so clumsy!
The leather! It's creasing!
Hey! What are you doing with my belt?
Come back here!
Uh, thanks anyway.
Eat hay, cowboy!
No one's even come close
to beating your time on that bull.
I know!
- Hey, this is actually pretty fun.
- Mm-hmm.
Hey, can you go grab me a water?
Watching these losers eat
dirt is making me thirsty.
Um, what are you doing?
Contributing to this
man's hospital bill?
Then why are you taking his money?
Are you making bets on the side?
That's illegal.
Okay, okay, one or two.
But nothing crazy, you see?
What about your other pocket?
Ok, but that's the last of it.
Please don't look in my pants.
Unbelievable.
You said we were partners
and this whole time, you've been
running a side hustle without me?
I need this extra cash to get Mom
a better gift than all of you.
Well, that does it.
You've beaten every
challenger on the list.
Yes! The 500 is mine!
Ours. The money is ours.
Not until we give the reigning champ
a chance to defend their record.
And who's that?
Me.
- Celia?
- Word is,
someone broke my record.
I'm here to reclaim what's mine.
Yeah, I don't think you want to do that.
Jake is going to mop the floor with you!
At least someone in your
house is mopping the floors.
Y'all are filthy.
We're all in!
Yeah, this wad of money
says 'You're going down.'
Giddy up, punks.
Mom, can you please help
me get this thing off?
I've tried everything.
Okay, come on.
- Momma's got you covered.
- Right.
It's still.. not
working!
Oh!
Sorry!
Still stuck!
Oh!
Is it loosening?
No!
Okay, time to to try something else.
Uh, this might hurt a bit.
No, no, no. Wait.
Mom, you'll never guess what I got you.
What's with the welding gear?
Oh, you know, just mom life.
Okay, well, Happy Mother's Day, Mom.
A gift? For me?
Ooh, what's in here?
Ah!
My Electron Accelerator Belt!
How ever did you find this?!
I sto I "s" worded it.
Do you like it?
I love it.
Oh, it truly is the theft that counts.
I'm gonna go stash it in the lair!
Milo! Uh
What are you doing here?
You stole my Accelerator Belt!
That's not true!
I have trackers on every
piece in my collection.
And my app says it's in your basement!
Well, joke's on you.
'Cause this house doesn't
even have a basement!
Right, Hartley?
Nope, no basement!
You're lying!
And I know because this
app is just like me
Never wrong!
Can I see it?
Ooh, looks like it's wrong now.
I know what I saw.
And if you don't take me
to your basement right now,
you'll be getting a visit from
my dad's superhero connections!
Superheroes? Here?
That's right! This just got real!
Amy, we have no choice.
Just give him the belt back.
No way. You saw how
happy it made my mom.
Well, you can't have
superheroes show up here.
And you can't let my
Milo see your secret lair.
Maybe it's not a lair.
Maybe it's a showroom just like his.
Oh, you're good.
Mom, I don't have time to explain,
but I need your help lying to someone.
Oh, honey! What are moms for?
What's with the blindfold?
Well, just like your security
measures for your showroom,
- we have our own.
- Oh, please, your showroom
can't be nearly as impressive as my
Sweet superhero spandex!
This place is amazing!
Of course, it is.
But we don't have superhero stuff,
we deal exclusively with
supervillain merchandise.
Cool! I bet villains are easier to stiff
because they're not very smart.
Hm?
Ah-ah!
No touchie.
Who are you?
Oh, I'm the bouncer.
You break anything, I break you.
No touchie it is.
Okay, little man, I
think you've seen enough.
And obviously, the belt's not here
so it's time for you to go.
It may not be visible to the naked eye,
But luckily, the tracker app is also
on my watch.
Yeah, well good luck finding
anything because it's not
A-ha!
Hartley! How could you
s-word that poor kid's belt?
Oh, you've got to be kidding me.
Now if you'll excuse me,
- I'll be on my way.
- Oh, not so fast.
You're gonna have to get
through the bouncer first.
Ooh, kitty cat has claws.
Okay, you want the belt? Fine.
You can have it. Under one condition.
Y'll have to battle me for it.
Battle you?
Yeah, I have my superhero stuff.
You have your supervillain stuff.
Let's solve our problems like they do.
Wait, us three?
Against you?
I could destroy you in my sleep.
Well then, all I have to say is
Ooh!
Nighty-night.
Let's just get this over with.
She did it! She beat your time.
Momma didn't come to play.
Where'd you learn to ride like that?
I used to wrangle wild
boars when I was a kid.
For fun?
For dinner.
Well, that does it.
She's still the champ.
Unless you want to
challenge her again
You're darn tootin'! We need that money.
Jake, get up there and
show her who's boss!
Actually, since we're
betting your money,
I think you should be the
one riding against Celia.
What?! No way. I've got
a rotator-cuff thing.
If you forfeit, I win the money.
Hi-ho, Silver. Let's ride.
Turn it up to full rag-doll.
And make it hurt.
Ahh! Ahh!
Come on, bull!
Whoa! Whoa!
Happy Mother's Day, Celia.
It is now.
I think I dislocated my butt.
Prepare for battle.
How do I shoot this thing?
That's a lamp.
Ahh!
Wait a minute.
That didn't come from your device!
Oh, well, that's because
my device is invisible.
Oh, that makes sense.
Uncanny!
Whatever device you're using
makes you sound exactly
like that supervillain.
What's her name?
You know, the one with
the annoying voice thingie.
You think she has an
annoying voice thingie?
Whoa!
Take a good look, 'cause you'll
never see this belt again!
Wait.
that's not the belt.
- We're fighting over a knockoff.
- What?
That belt still has the
Bolt regulator on it.
Bolt regulator?
I I mean, I know what that is,
but can you explain for everyone else?
At the bridge,
Monarch shot the regulator off my
Surge's belt.
But this belt still has it.
Any collector worth their
salt would know the difference.
So my most prized piece of memorabilia
is a complete fabrication?
Don't want anyone to panic,
but I'm starting to
lose feeling in my toes.
Who's this guy?
That helmet. It's glorious!
Oh, well, in that case,
we will give you the helmet
if you promise to not
tell anybody about us
or here ever again.
- Deal!
- Oh, great.
Okay, it's yours.
You just have to figure
how to get it off.
Easy-peasy.
Latch. Should've thought of that.
So you're telling me
I was put in a headlock
banged against a wall
and almost melted like a s'more
and this whole time, there was a latch?
We didn't know!
You sure we can trust that Milo kid?
Yeah, he's a man of his word.
Plus, I reminded him
I know where he lives.
Well, Mom, I couldn't buy you a gift
but now that my helmet's off,
you're getting the best gift of all
my face.
Technically, your face
is something I made,
so that's like next-level regifting.
Mm, you're lucky you're cute.
Happy Mother's Day, Mom. I
got you your favorite thing.
Something that'll be dead in a week.
Ah! Flowers?
You're lucky you're cute.
What happened to you?
Uh, I fell off a mechanical bull.
What were you doing on one of those?
Trying to win prize money to
get you the best gift ever.
Ah. So
You tormented yourself
and have to suffer the pain
all because you want to
get me something nice.
Oh, that's gift enough for me.
Yes!
I'm sorry I messed up your gift, Mom.
I really wanted your day to be special.
It was special.
Hey, it's not every
day you get to team up
with your favorite girl and
battle a superhero fanboy.
Yeah. We've still got it, huh?
You bet your butt we do.
But I guess since the belt fell through,
I'm gonna have to spin the wheel.
I threw the wheel away.
What?
I think Hartley was on to something
when she said Mother's Day
was less about the gifts
and more about who you spend it with.
Lucky for me, I got
to spend it with you.
- Thanks, Mom.
- Mm.
Did we just have our first
real mother-daughter moment?
Oh, I think we did.
What is happening to us?