Tucker's Witch (1982) s01e04 Episode Script

- Hands off, hands off, Eric stop him! - Hey! - Honey, I gotta shave.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
Just one more try, please, I've gotta practice this.
- Well, look, is it gonna take long? - I have never had trouble with lights.
- Well, you got a little slump.
Why don't you try witching in the bedroom, huh? - Okay, sorry, honey.
- Hmm.
I needed this.
This coffee's cold.
- It can't be, we just had the coffee maker fixed.
- Yeah, well, they fixed it to make cold coffee.
- Oh, yeah, your grandmother had a spell for brag weed or was it poison ivy.
I can't remember.
Anyway, look, can't you help me? Can't you help me with the bugs in my garden.
I mean the white fly is attacking everything in the garden.
At this rate, I'll be out of the herb business in a week.
Could you, oh.
Oh, maybe the, maybe the garden shop would know, oh, oh, pot roast.
- You're gonna kill the bugs with a pot roast? - What? - She's just nervous.
Tonight we get to meet Bernie.
- Aw.
- Well, I do hope you like him.
I mean I.
I really am very nervous.
But I haven't invited anybody home since your father died and I, uh, I think you'll really like him.
I mean, what if you don't like him.
- Ellen.
- What? - We'll like him.
- You will? - Even if we hate him.
- Really? - What is this? - Oh, that looks like Mrs.
Henderson, my seventh grade math teacher.
That's great.
This morning so far we've had popping light bulbs, bugs in the garden and now a close call with electrocution.
I need a rest.
I am going to work.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Bye, Ellen.
- Bye.
Uh, could I borrow your pencil? - Sure.
- Thanks.
- Good morning Marcia, what's new.
- These bills.
- Oh, no, no, please later.
- There's someone in your office.
- There's a client? - It's hard to tell.
- Good morning.
May I help you? - Men came to steal the past from us.
Kill young boy.
Take him from earth, what's been sleeping for 10 lifetimes.
- Wait a minute, now I'm just a little bit lost here.
- You are the one who finds things? - Finds things, oh, yes, I'm a detective.
I'm Rick Tucker.
And you are? - Curondero.
- Mr.
Curondero.
- No.
- No? - No.
Curondero is exorcista.
He's priest.
- He's a priest, okay, got it.
- Chichen Itza.
- Chichen Itza.
That's your name.
- No, Chichen Itza Yucatan.
- Oh, Chichen Itza's in the Yucatan.
- Si.
Belin.
- What's Belin? - My name.
They steal death mask of Toltec.
Big, big curse.
You bring back.
- Wait a minute, who stole the Toltec death mask? - These men from Hudson Museum.
They're archaeologists.
- Archeologists? Well, I'm not so sure that we are the people that you want.
How did you find us? Ah, the yellow pages.
- Hi, honey.
- Hi.
- You go to museum of Hudson.
- Amanda, this is.
- Take the case.
- Amanda.
Could you excuse us just a moment.
Please, you don't know what this case is about.
- Rick, I feel it in my bones.
This one is a must.
- Honey, look, he wants us to find something called the Toltec death mask.
It's got a curse on it.
I mean it's crazy, it's wacky.
We're not gonna make a dime on this.
- Rick, please, trust me.
This is gonna be one of our most fascinating cases.
And it's going to please us financially.
- I got $10 says you're seeing things.
- Oh, you're on.
- He's gone.
Great.
- What's this? What was the name of that museum? - Museum of Hudson.
- Hello.
We're looking for the chief archeologist.
- You mean Dr.
Harris.
- Right, where do we find him? - Just down the hall.
Oh, you're gonna have to check your piece.
Private detective, right? - Right.
- That means you carry a piece.
- You're a sharp guy Stanley.
- Nothing much gets by me.
Including you.
- Of course I've heard of the Toltec death mask.
I've also heard of the golden fleece, Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny.
It's all make believe, fairy tales.
It's not archeology.
- Honey, you heard enough? - Mr.
Harris, this man also said that the men who stole the mask murdered an Indian boy.
- Oh, yeah, yeah, we heard it was a brawl.
Too much.
That's their local fire water.
- Were there two men on a dig? - Yes, they're my assistants.
Jim Haskell, Eric Green.
- Hi.
- Hi.
Looks like fun.
Kind of like a puzzle, huh? - A little more painstaking than a puzzle Mr? - Tucker.
- Tucker.
- This piece goes right here.
I'm good at puzzles.
- How about you? Know anything about the Indian boy? - Me, what would I know? - Amanda, how about lunch? - Look, we were there digging in pre-Columbian ceremonial grounds.
Now sometimes the local population gets a little upset.
- Now who can blame them? - Very true.
But sometimes their imagination gets the best of them.
And a simple pre-Columbian stone statue like this becomes the Toltec death mask.
- Look, I got a game at the racket club.
I'll work on this at home.
- Oh, please don't take this home.
- Why not? - Well, it's probably very valuable.
Somebody could steal it.
- Oh, no, no, it's not valuable.
Have a good game Jim.
- I'll check in later.
- Uh, we're leaving, too.
Honey, I am starving.
Sorry to bother you.
- No problem.
- There's a great restaurant here.
- Relax.
Just relax.
- I was embarrassed.
You were absolutely spooky.
- Bologna and cheese for me, avocado and sprouts for you.
I wanted to make them nervous.
- You made me nervous.
- What was all that about the stone statue? - Oh, Rick, it gave off incredibly negative energy.
It gave me an awful feeling.
- I know the feeling.
What is this? Avocado and sprouts on a bagel? - Yeah, I had a feeling that you might like it.
I'll take it back.
- No, I can bend.
Look, here we are, two professionals, not bad.
- Thanks.
- Practically accusing them a perfectly legitimate archeologist of murder, of stealing a mask that may or may not exist and all for a non-paying client who disappeared.
You hear him come up? Senor Belin, we've been looking into this.
- You must not stop.
Evil grows.
- See, we sort of need something concrete.
- The curse, people will die.
- The curse, yes.
- What, yes, what? - The magic belongs with my people.
It is ours.
- Nobody should steal other people's magic.
- When you two are through, just let me know, huh? - Spanish doubloons.
- Rick, these date back to the 16th century.
They're pure gold.
- Senor Belin, we don't have to.
Why did I even bother looking around, I knew he wouldn't be there.
Okay, well, we got paid, now what? - Well, first you pay me the 10 bucks you owe me.
Then, we just relax and eat our lunch.
- Relax, do nothing? - Mm-hmm, something will happen, trust me.
- Good afternoon Stanley.
- Ms.
Price.
Oh, you don't have to worry about that.
We know who you are.
- No, no, rules are rules.
- Dr.
Harris is expecting you.
- Thank you, Stanley.
- Thank you.
- You're very good.
It only took you three digs to find it.
But now you're not going to give the mask to me, are you? - That's right Jessica.
- You want more money.
- 2 million dollars.
- Ah, greed, it's wonderful, both yours and mine.
- Deposited in my Swiss account, then you get the mask.
- Ah, so sad to be an obsessive.
Gives people such power over you.
Well, I must have the mask so 2 million it is.
But you're going to have to give me a few days.
Buying stolen artifacts is a little tricky from an accounting point of view.
- Oh, I'm sure you'll manage.
- How soon am I going to see the mask? - As soon as the money's in my account, not only can you see it, it'll be in your hot little hands.
- Ooh, oh.
Lentils smell delicious.
- Only the best for you and Bernie.
- Oh, thank you.
- Mom! - What? - Look what I found.
- What? Oh, Mother's amber broach.
- For good luck.
Here.
- How do I look.
- Mom, you look so beautiful.
- I don't, I don't.
No, something's wrong with my hair.
My hair's not right.
Well, I don't think I should really wear this broach with these pearls, do you and the dress, you think the dress? - Ellen.
- This is wrong, this is wrong.
- Ellen.
- What? - You look terrific.
Scratch terrific, you look sensational.
- You really think so? - I know so.
Look, let me be honest with you.
I liked Amanda right from the start, but when I saw you that clenched the deal.
I said this kid has got great genes.
- Oh, you're abnormally silly today.
- I'll tell you why I took the afternoon off.
I put myself entirely in your daughter's hands.
She said wait for something to happen.
I'm still waiting.
- Something's happening.
- What? - Rick, we've got to get over to Jim Haskell's house right away.
- Look, Amanda, I know these hunches work sometimes, but can't it wait till after dinner? - No, this one is really awful.
Please believe me.
Oh, Mom, I'm so sorry.
- Well, it's all right dear, it's all right.
- What about Bernie? - Well, I, I know that look.
Her grandmother used to get that look right before a disaster.
- Was she always right? - Oh, uh, 50/50.
- Bye.
- Bye.
- The mask is safe.
- Oh, good.
- I was there.
I heard.
- What, what are you talking about? - 2 million dollars in your Swiss bank account.
- Oh, hey, don't get excited.
I was gonna raise your share.
I was gonna raise it to $250,000 each.
- Try half.
- Hey, come on, Jim, be reasonable.
I'm the one who spent years pouring over documents and maps.
I'm the one who determined where the mask was.
A million is completely out of the question.
- I'm not Eric.
I'm not one of your robots.
You know he's coming over now.
And when he finds out about Price, he could turn on you.
And that could get pretty gamey.
Think about it.
- Yeah.
- I got some soup on the stove.
You care to join me.
- Sure, why not.
- Just another night of breaking and entering.
- This is breaking and entering.
Mostly breaking.
- Amanda? Soup's still warm.
Needs a little salt.
Shh.
Thought I heard something.
- Rick? Rick there's something really bad right here.
- There's a give here, let's check it out.
- Rick.
There's blood on it.
I was right.
- Dead right.
- Okay, fellows, let's wrap it up here.
Toltec death mask, huh? You figure that's why this Haskell guy was murdered? - Definitely.
Um, we figure that they kept the mask in this case here.
- Well, actually no one has really seen the mask.
- No one has really seen the mask.
- See, the old Indian priest has and he's hired us and he gave us a drawing on parchment and we've sort of been going on that.
- Uh-huh.
- He's paying us in these real rare old, uh, Spanish doubloons.
- Ah, things a little slow for you people? Well, let's see what we got here.
- Cut it out.
- You already told me about the soup.
Ah, too much salt.
- See, we figure that he was sitting over here, right, and he's having a bowl of soup or he's planning to have a bowl of soup and the doorbell rings.
So he gets up and he goes to the door and, uh.
Well, that's it.
- What's it? You didn't say anything.
He's too young to be senile.
- What happened? - Jim's dead.
- What about the mask.
- Those two killed him.
I was on my way to see Jim.
I saw through the window.
They called the police, tried to make it out like a robbery/murder.
They're trying to pin it on us.
See, they found the mask.
They want to keep it for themselves.
- We've got to get the mask.
Then we got to get rid of them.
- Yes.
- Oh, come on, Mom, don't bother.
- Oh.
- Ellen, we feel terrible about this.
- Well, will you two please stop.
There's no reason to feel so bad about it.
Anyway work comes first.
Besides Bernie and I had a perfectly lovely time all by ourselves and so there's no harm done.
- Mother, you know you don't mean that.
- Of course I do.
You can always meet Bernie another time.
- Ellen, don't you ever get mad? - Well, naturally, I'm only human.
- I don't remember ever seeing you mad.
What's it look like? - Oh, very much like this.
- If I'd just read Dickens five minutes sooner, we could have saved Haskell.
- Amanda, don't do that.
Don't second guess yourself.
Come here.
No, no, Dickens, Dickens, not now.
- Wait a minute.
Dickens? Dickens what is it? - He hears that cat in heat.
- Dickens? Oh, poor baby.
- Sorry pal, I just don't know the family.
- I still think that whoever killed Haskell stole the mask.
- Nope.
- Rick.
The place was a mess.
That means the killer searched it, found the case, took the mask.
I mean you saw the case was empty.
- Mm-hmm.
Mm-mm.
It means the killer knew the mask was under the floor, found the case empty, then searched the apartment and left without the mask.
- Well, how do you figure that.
- What? He wouldn't take the mask and leave the case now would he? Eric still isn't home.
He hasn't been home all night.
I called him at two, then again at four this morning.
I'm gonna go on over there.
- I want to check out Harris.
- What about the key? - Later.
First I want to see how Harris is reacting to Jim's death.
For if he but flinch, I know my course.
Oh, Shakespeare.
- Um.
It was on the tip of my tongue.
- I can't help it Jessica.
The museum is on to something.
Now I want that money deposited in my account by tomorrow.
- By all means.
I will make the arrangements.
- Good.
- Good morning.
- Well, actually it's a very sad morning.
Jim Haskell was found murdered last night.
- I know.
I know I just heard it.
That's really terrible.
Do they have any idea who did it? - No.
Senseless murders happen in Los Angeles almost every day.
Mrs.
Tucker, the police suspect he was a victim of a robbery.
- Well, I was just wondering of perhaps you changed your mind.
- About what? - About it having something to do with the Toltec death mask.
- Ah.
Perhaps so Mrs.
Tucker.
Perhaps a tribe of vengeful Chichen Itza Indians encircled Jim's bungalow, murdered him and then made away with the mask.
- Or perhaps one man did it all.
- Mm.
It's been a very rough morning, so Mrs.
Tucker if you don't mind.
- Certainly, I understand.
I just stopped by to offer my condolences.
- Thank you, you're very kind.
- Dr.
Harris, the chemicals.
- Ah! That was close.
- Yes, it was.
- Thank you very much.
- Don't mention it.
- Boy, I sure do appreciate this Mrs.
Crendler.
You know, Eric would have come himself accept he got so snockered last night that he couldn't even get out of bed.
What do I do, I come all the way over here, I forget the keys.
There.
Let's see, something to carry his clothes in.
Maybe I don't.
- This sweater and shirt don't go together.
- Oh, you're so right.
- Mrs.
Crendler, could you help me.
Could you pick a shirt and a sweater that color coordinate? Would you? That would be so helpful.
Eric wanted me to get him some records.
- He doesn't have any.
Records.
- Veracruz, Guadalajara and the Yucatan.
- And we know that Eric was in all three places but the question is why.
- Check the library, Marcia.
See if there were any expeditions down there that correspond with the dates on these postcards, okay? - Seems like I do all my sightseeing in libraries.
- Oh, start with the back issues of Archeology Digest, the sections on current expeditions.
We want to know who was behind the expeditions and who they were looking for.
- Be a detective, see the world.
- Thanks.
- Price.
2 million, 2 million dollars.
Who would pay 2 million dollars for a stolen Toltec artifact.
- Take it from an ex-archeology major, nobody.
It could never be shown.
- Unless it was stolen to sell to somebody else.
Remember you told me about a guy once who lived in Chicago? - Oh, yeah.
That guy who bought hot paintings and kept them in a hidden room.
He didn't care if they were stolen or not, he just wanted to keep them to look at for his own private pleasure.
- Right.
Now if that's what we've got here, then for whoever the buyer is.
- Price is no object.
- I want the mask.
- I don't have it.
- You killed Jim.
I trusted you, I followed you.
The mask or I'll blow you away.
- It's over there.
Here it is.
I found it.
- Ah! - Boy do I have great stuff.
Shrimp in black bean sauce, pan fried noodles and Szechuan chicken.
What's up? - Tell her.
- In May 1979, there was an expedition to the pyramid burial grounds near Veracruz.
In March 1981, there was one to the Mayan caves near Guadalajara and two weeks ago to the pre-Columbian ceremonial grounds in Chichen Itza.
Marcia.
- All headed by Wayne Harris and all financed by one person.
- Jessica Price.
- Price 2 million dollars.
- You know her? - She outbid the Met for the Nigerian bronzes, overpaid a million dollars.
Then she bought out the entire brick collection of ninth century Siamese stone cut Buddha figures.
Overpaid millions.
- And now it appears that Ms.
Price is buying the Toltec death mask.
- Or does she already have it? - Let's ask her.
- This is horrible.
- Well, aren't they supposed to be scary? - Oh, no, I mean all these marvelous masks and totems and gods, what are they doing in a Pasadena mansion.
People have no right to steal other people's magic.
- Well, don't look at me.
I don't even do card tricks.
- Like this voodoo mask.
I mean, doesn't it make you stop and wonder how anyone could.
Have the good sense and artistic foresight to understand the importance and influence of primitive culture.
- Bravo.
A kindred spirit I see.
- Indeed.
- I do adore the primitive.
It's so mysterious, so magical.
And I believe in magic, do you? - Only when it works.
- What a curious answer.
Please.
- Thank you.
- Now my secretary said you phoned and gave her three names, Veracruz, Guadalajara and Chichen Itza.
Which caused me to postpone a board meeting.
You obviously know which buttons to push.
- It's just that Mrs.
Tucker and I have been long time admirers of your ability to collect these incredible artifacts.
- We followed all your quests.
- The latest being your three digs in Mexico.
- You might say that we're Jessica Price groupies.
- Shall we just get on with it.
- Sure, see I located a fellow, Jim Haskell, you know him? - Just go on.
- You must know him.
He works for a guy named Harris.
Dr.
Wayne Harris.
Does that ring a bell? Maybe it'll come to you later.
Anyway, Jim and I made a deal and I bought this mask.
It's beautiful.
- It's magical.
- Anyway, poor Jim won't be able to enjoy his money.
He turned up dead, you hear about that? Anyhow, the price of the Toltec death mask is now 3 million dollars.
- Now why should I pay 3 million dollars for something I already own.
- Well.
I guess there must be two of them lady.
- Wait a moment.
You say you have the mask and Wayne Harris says he has it.
I really don't care who has it.
I'll buy the Toltec death mask from whoever brings it to me.
- We'll be in touch.
- Thank you.
- Look, look, Jessica I'm telling you, it's not true.
- The Tuckers say they have it.
Now you're not getting a dime until I see that mask.
- Hmm, well, well, we know that Jessica Price doesn't have the mask.
- What about Harris.
- If he does, what's he waiting for? Why didn't he give it to Price already and get the money.
Unless.
Harris doesn't have it either.
- What about Eric? Couldn't he be running some sort of a double cross.
- Maybe.
Good.
Let me ask around on the street and see if anybody's heard anything.
- Okay.
- And then I will meet you back at the museum.
- Why there? - You can bet Ms.
Price is gonna tell Harris about our little visit and maybe we can force his hand.
- Good idea.
I'm gonna go check out that key at Lou's.
Now it shouldn't take me long, so I'll probably beat you to the museum.
- Okay.
- It's a mailbox key.
- A mailbox key? - Mm-hmm.
- Well, couldn't it be for a safe or maybe a storage room or a safe deposit box.
- Nope, just mailboxes.
- Thank you.
- Or a locker.
- A locker? - Like a gym.
- Hiya Stanley.
Dr.
Harris in? - Nope.
- Eric Green didn't sign out last night, huh? - What are you talking about? - Did you see him leave? - No, what's that got to do with you? - He got by you Stan.
You don't mind if I hang around, do you? - No.
Hey, I'll take your boom boom private eye.
- How you doing handsome.
- Good morning.
- Excuse me.
Hi.
- Hi.
- Those clothes and things back there.
Who do they belong to? - Delinquents.
Members who haven't paid their dues.
- I knew that.
Do you know Jim Haskell? - No.
- Well, he's a member and I'm his cousin.
And well, he sent me down to take care of it.
He's always been really terrible about these things, you know the type? - I think so.
- Oh, thank you.
Bye.
- Let's see Haskell.
$35.
- $35, may I see this.
- Sure.
$35.
Thank you very much.
- Sure.
- And, uh, keep the change.
- Beautiful isn't it? - No, no, no, Marcia hasn't heard from her either.
And going to a key place shouldn't take that long.
- Should I worry? - Oh, no, you know Amanda.
She's probably picking up a new coffee maker.
Right, bye.
- You try that again and I will blow your head off.
- Hey, Stanley.
You know that Egyptian sun goddess out on the side? - Yeah.
- There's some guy in a leisure suit who's drawing a mustache on it.
- What? - Look, I know we're not on the best of terms, but I don't want to get you in any trouble, you know.
- Well, well, look who we have here.
- Just came back to finish that puzzle.
Take your time, catch your breath.
- Oh, I'm fine.
I'm very busy so if, uh.
- You know I read somewhere that shortness of breath can be caused by tension, things like guilt, fear of being found out.
- I can assure you this was brought on by very heavy physical labor.
See, I had this very heavy object I had to move, it was giving me a lot of trouble.
- Oh, the Toltec death mask shouldn't be that heavy.
- Oh, you are obsessed with that mask, aren't you? - Not me, no, but Ms.
Price is.
- Oh, yes, Jessica called me about you and your wife.
Where is Mrs.
Tucker by the way? - She's around.
- So you found me out.
What are you gonna do about it.
- Oh, I would think the Hudson Museum would be very interested to find out that their chief archaeologist stole.
- Stole what? A mask that nobody knows even exists.
A mask that no one but Jessica Price will ever see.
- Then you do have the mask.
- Get out.
- It meant nothing to you to steal what's sacred to other people? - For 2 million dollars, nothing at all.
- You killed Haskell.
- Prove it.
Prove it.
- And Eric.
- Stanley, will you come in here please.
- Where is Eric? He signed in last night, but he never signed back out.
Did you kill him, too, Harris.
And the Indian boy.
- Stanley, will you get this man out of here please.
- All right, buddy, let's get moving.
- Stanley, this man has stolen artifacts that rightfully belong to another country and he is a murderer.
Now we have to search this place right now.
- Stanley, if you don't do what I say, I'll get you fired.
Think about it Stanley, there's a recession out there.
- All right, let's move it.
- What's with the lights.
- Never mind the lights, just move it.
- Amanda.
Sorry Stanley.
Amanda! Amanda, where are you? I knew you were dead.
I don't believe I just did that.
Amanda! Baby, where are you.
Amanda.
Honey you in there? Amanda.
You all right? The mask.
You found the mask.
That's beautiful.
Aw.
Here, this is gonna hurt.
- Thanks for dropping by.
- It's good to see you cutie.
Hey.
- What? - Forgot one.
You know this is a nifty statue Senor Belin sent us.
- Yeah.
- What do you suppose it is? - What do you think it is? - Okay.
This is a legendary Toltec love charm.
- Toltec love charm.
- For centuries adventurers, soldiers of fortune and museums from the four corners of the world have been trying to get their hands on this little baby.
- What does this little baby do? - Whoever possesses the Toltec love charm.
- Mm-hmm.
- Become instantly irresistible.
Was I close.
- Well.
- What is it really? - It's supposed to make your corn grow, but I love your version better.