Vanity Fair (2018) s01e04 Episode Script
Episode 4
The story so far.
We've seen an old enemy bring Becky down.
Better luck in your next life.
And we've seen a new friend raise her up until Oh, dear.
Becky's secret marriage made rich aunt Matilda rather cross.
Treasure hunter.
Revolutionary.
Our second wedding united a pair of lovers in defiance of both their families.
I will do as my honour demands.
And four happy honeymooners left one lonely hero behind.
Tonight, Becky finds a new use for old friends, and why not? This is Vanity Fair, a world where everyone is striving for what is not worth having.
- Shout when you need me.
- What I need is a valet.
In our temporary embarrassment in the financing of servants And grocers and landlords.
Damn it.
You'll just have to make do with me.
Maybe I'll leave tomorrow instead.
Tomorrow the rent collector comes and we can't pay him.
Darling, you rather urgently need to make some money, because if I'm to be a camp follower on a glorious battlefield Officers do not have camp followers.
If I'm going to be an officer's wife drinking fine wine in crystal goblets, either way, I must have pretty underthings.
How shall I concentrate on soldiering? - Coast is clear.
- No angry rent collectors, - no disappointed grocers.
- Routed by superior forces.
Shall I take Mr George's plate, sir? Take it away and lay it again tomorrow.
And every day.
Till the damn fool runs out of money and comes crawling back.
Father please don't let my brother go to war unforgiven.
I have nothing to apologise for.
Why should I say sorry to him? Because Napoleon will be upon us horse and foot before three weeks are over, and give us such a dance as to make the war up until now seem like child's play.
We are only going to Brussels, Dobbin.
Famously full of fine people and ladies of fashion.
Well, I hope you will represent our destination in that kindly light to Mrs Osborne.
Amelia will enjoy the party.
Half of London society is already there.
Dobbin it's an adventure.
Smile.
Now, what's this, crybaby? I'm I'm just writing a letter to my mother, sir.
Gad.
The poor lady is just so damned kind to me.
Now, you be a good soldier, Ensign Stubble.
Just think, sir, all the men here, sir, all their mothers and all their sweethearts How many of us will come home again? Make her proud.
I could not leave England without coming here, without taking possibly my last chance of saying something to you of truly vital importance for myself and and-and I hope, Miss Osborne, for you, too.
Captain Dobbin, I'm quite overcome.
Oh, oh, God.
Oh, no, I'm so sorry.
I I've failed to make myself clear.
I've come with someone else's happiness in mind, not my own.
Ah, Captain Dobbin.
Off to war, is it? Show them all we are not afraid of any damned Frenchman, what.
Is the quarrel of my making? What did I ever seek but his good? For which I've been toiling like a convict since the day he was born.
Still, should anything happen to him, I think I think you would never forgive yourself if you hadn't parted in charity.
George has had three times as much money from me as I warrant your father ever gave you.
My father was a grocer, sir, and I a scholarship boy.
And he never found you a West Indian bride to keep you in wealth all your long days.
I am a self-made man, but I raised my son a gentleman.
And he repays me by marrying in the gutter.
Mrs Osborne is the best creature in the world.
And no man shall insult her in my presence.
Pistols at dawn, is it? Good work, Captain Dobbin.
I hope you can live with yourself.
In a few days we'll set sail and nobody is going to send bailiffs all the way to Belgium.
I might if some scallywag owed me three months' rent.
But in the grand scheme of things, our little debts are nothing.
There's a grand scheme of things.
Some of the men marching today have been fighting this war for more than 20 years.
Survivors like you.
Someone has to win, and why shouldn't it be us? Do we not emerge the victors from every challenge? How are we going to pay for this hotel? All you have to do, my love, for my plan to work out is play your cards right.
- Point of four.
- Making.
- 39.
- Not good.
I've got 40.
I believe your Rawdon is widely famed for his skills as a player.
Everyone has to be good at something.
I think of it as a useful way of keeping all foolish gentlemen out of trouble.
Oh, Becky, we leave all our troubles behind.
Full house.
I think that's a hundred down, Osborne.
And sway.
And cast off.
Right foot first.
You never used to complain about my dancing before.
Come on.
Oh, no, no.
No, no.
Becky is always so lively.
She has a light heart, it's a good thing in a woman.
You like her better now, I'm glad.
Oh, Captain Dobbin, we've missed you.
Mrs Osborne, very glad to have found you both.
I have a letter from home for George.
- Has the old monster relented? - Becky.
It's not father's handwriting, it's odd.
It's from his lawyer.
"I am commissioned by Mr Osborne to inform you that in consequence of the marriage which you have been pleased to contract, he ceases to consider you henceforth as a member of his family.
This determination is final and irrevocable as is this settlement.
" 2,000 pounds.
- Dearest love.
- This is all your fault.
Don't speak to her like that.
He means me, not Amelia.
George! George.
Is not 2,000 pounds an immense deal of money? To a common foot soldier it's a fortune.
On and on at me, never shut up until you had me married, and ruined, and now I'm a beggar, and a married beggar, too, and it's your fault.
But you are still the luckiest man in the world.
How can you not see that? He doesn't even write himself.
He gets his lawyer to do it.
And what the devil am I to do with 2,000 pounds? I lost 140 pounds to Rawdon Crawley yesterday.
Well, George, I imagine you'll have to live on your pay.
How can a man like me do that? How am I supposed to keep up my position in the world? And, no, do not say I could live as you do, with no fun and no entertainment.
Or do you want my wife to take in soldiers' washing? Control yourself, George.
She's here.
She's cost me dearer than I ever imagined, Dobbin.
A fine manager of a gentleman's affairs you've turned out to be.
- Darling? - All is well.
Yeah.
They'll set sail tomorrow so the minute you set eyes on Captain Osborne in the morning make sure to ask him for the money before he gets on that boat.
Ship, not boat.
Oh, I correct you and you don't like it? Nonsense, I love it, just don't make a habit of it.
So, what's our plan? Once we get to Belgium, I'm going to look for new gaming partners for you.
- Very good.
- And new friends.
Useful people with more reliable pockets who are generally just less annoying.
In your spare time, Becks, can you also win us the war? Do you doubt it? Non, that is trop cher, madame, trop - much money.
- Tant pis.
I wish Becky were here.
She'd know how to make a pretty bargain.
I hope she joins us soon.
If you want female company even on our honeymoon, your wish has sadly come true.
Sure, it's Captain Osborne, and this your new lady wife? Amelia, may I present Major O'Dowd of ours.
And his lady wife, which is to say me, Peggy O'Dowd of Glenmaloney.
And now, shoo, Major O'Dowd, and you, too, Captain Osborne.
Away to the mess wit' you now.
Men! Always in the way.
Would you ever think there was a war on, Mrs Osborne? To see all these flowers.
- So many soldiers, Mrs O'Dowd.
- Lord love 'em.
Does your husband expect an actual battle very soon? Now, we are army wives, my dear.
Our sacred duty is to keep our men cheerful and try not to think about all that till the last minute.
Ah, look around you, Amelia.
Observe the quality, these are exactly the sort of people we should be moving amongst.
Such an opportunity to shine.
My Lady Bareacres, how marvellous it is to see you and how charming you look.
Do I know this young man? Captain Osborne, Mama.
Famous for flirting.
Flirting, gambling, charming all the ladies and riding into war with the King's army, at your service, my lady.
Faintly delicious whiskers.
Inferior regiment.
And married.
Fading already.
- That is the quality? - I shall invite them to dinner.
- No.
- Why the great ladies of quality should leave your pretty side for that ugly owd fellow That is General Tufto of the Household Cavalry.
I do know that, young man.
Does he have me for an utter fool? - Ach, no, Peggy.
- And there's his aide-de-camp.
Thank heavens.
That means Becky must have arrived.
Gentlemen.
My dear Mrs Crawley.
Mon generale.
Oh, you naughty man.
For the prettiest lady in the regiment, eh, Crawley? You lucky devil.
Famous frontal development.
Oh, she is changed.
George, how beautiful she looks.
All the other ladies have a bouquet.
Emmy, why didn't you have a bouquet? Might that be because you didn't buy her one? Would you stand down, old girl? I shall be quite safe, darling.
At last we are alone, Mrs Crawley.
Enter.
Captain George.
So nice of you to join us.
The general and I were rather moping in here, all alone.
- Infantryman? - Yes, sir.
Excuse me.
She's my dearest friend.
No better than she should be.
Dear me, what an old fool.
Thank you for being my knight in shining armour.
Mrs Crawley, you look ravishing.
All eyes are on you tonight.
Then all eyes are blind, for there is not a woman in Belgium prettier than your lady wife.
I don't know where everyone gets this idea that I don't appreciate her.
She is a treasure, and you, naughty man, are not worthy of her.
Bring her to me and I'll tell her myself.
Oh, come tomorrow.
You may get revenge for that 140.
Indeed.
Please.
Imagine, Amelia, our general dines this evening with the Duke of Wellington.
He is honoured.
The commander-in-chief gives at least four grand dinners a week.
He ordered an entire wagon of silver plate from London, and every day is seen in the park with a different lady on his arm.
He makes very sure we can all see that no Englishman shall lose a wink of sleep over a little Corsican.
I'm told the French have crossed the frontier.
That's more than anyone's told me.
Though I am only an officer, whereas you Whereas we are on the staff and General Tufto is a great flirt of mine, isn't he, Rawdon? Shame he doesn't play, for he is made of money.
Come on, Osborne, wipe the floor with me.
Becky, where are his rooms, the general's rooms, I mean.
Next to ours, of course.
Rawdon is his aide-de-camp.
So close? Won't people talk? My dear little creature, how can we, with our means, live at all but for a friend to share expenses? Well What? Do you suppose Rawdon is not big enough to take care of my honour? Oh, no.
I did not mean to cause offence.
None is taken.
I'm sorry.
I do find having to be charming and flirt all day and half the night gets rather wearing.
Now, what are those naughty men of ours up to? - Point of four.
- Good.
I've got 40.
Four points.
May I light it for you? You're too kind.
Lord, how I love that smell.
Play on.
Perhaps we should raise a toast to new friendships? Enjoying your meringue, Lady Bareacres? Meringue, my lord, that's what it's supposed to be.
Meringue? Mama, my digestion is possibly too refined for le continent.
It's probably not le continent that is at fault, darling.
But the societe.
Ah, the society.
And how brilliant it is.
And all on display tomorrow night.
Lady Blanche, I hope I shall have the pleasure of appearing on your card more than once.
Dance with you? As long as you save the quadrille for me, George.
Well, surely she's not invited? How could they be so rude? How can they think they are so much better than us? Because they are better than us.
They are Lord and Lady Bareacres.
Their daughter is promised to a duke of the blood.
How much did last night cost us, George? The trembling lip and the constantly on the verge of tears, it's enough to drive a man mad.
- Why can't you be more like - Like Becky? She lives off her wits, as we must learn to do.
You never liked her before she learned to flirt and toss her hair.
- Oh, for God's sake.
- Let us not quarrel.
Please, God, let us not.
George.
George, please don't go.
Sorry, sir.
The flower, monsieur? Can I have those, please? Oui, bien sur.
It's quite simple, darling.
If I don't flirt with them, they don't visit.
If they don't visit, you don't play and if you don't play, we starve.
You're just a little too good at it, Becks.
Osborne has convinced himself that you are in love with him.
Oh, Captain Osborne, so handsome, so dangerous, can I light you another cigar? If I shan't be the finest lady at the ball, I shall be the most charming.
So everyone will want to meet us and all the wealthy gentlemen will want to play you and they will all have to form an orderly queue with foolish George Osborne firmly in the rear.
Now, that is what I call a plan.
Seems that the general does not give up so easily.
They're not from the general.
They're from Captain George Osborne.
Darling, no, I mean it.
I mean it.
Not if he were the last man on earth.
Non, non, Isidor.
Careful, man.
Mr Joseph! Oh, how utterly delightful.
Miss Sharp.
Oh, my dear, are we going to a ball? Do I have time to change? Isidor, careful.
Merde! Idiot! It's Mrs Crawley now.
This is my husband, Captain Crawley of the Life Guards.
Rawdon, may I introduce Amelia's brother, Mr Sedley? You've had a truly dreadful journey, you poor thing.
Madam, the collector of Boggley Wallah was not intended by his maker for sea travel.
But how could I miss the excitement? And how do I get a ticket? Hen's teeth, old boy, sorry.
Mrs Crawley! General Tufto.
Radiant.
Oh, but poor show.
The lady deserves better, Crawley.
Oh, gosh.
This way, my dear.
Gosh, are you going to have to fight that man in a duel now? Moustaches are strictly for soldiers.
Continental soldiers.
For God's sake, man, shave them off.
Oh, sorry.
Sorry.
I'm so sorry.
My Lady Bareacres, may I request a place on your card? Shall we? We needn't know them in England.
General Tufto, Captain Rawdon Crawley, and Mrs Crawley! You wouldn't have enjoyed it anyway, Mick, you old fool.
Much happier in here writing your orders.
There'll be such a ball danced tomorrow as some of 'em has never heard the tune of.
Dearest, why do you sit here all alone and dismally unhappy? Where's your naughty Captain George? Becky, I wish our friendship was as before.
Alas, we are married women now.
George is very poor now If you don't want George to gamble with Rawdon, then just stop him.
How can I? I promised to obey him.
That stuff is just make-believe, the things you say in church.
Amelia, the days are gone when it was possible for a woman to live her whole life as a girl.
I seek a partner for the waltz.
Go on, Amelia, please your husband.
You are the dancer.
He's so brave, so clever, so handsome.
It's not his fault I make him unhappy.
No, no, don't say such things.
I've cost him his father and his fortune.
Alas, Mrs Crawley is leaving.
Everybody was looking at my wife.
Everybody was dancing with my wife.
But she shall dance home with you.
What? When? You never used to like her at all.
"Sharp by name, sharp by nature.
" Rebecca Read it.
I mean every word.
William May I call you William? You've always been very kind to me.
Please take me home.
My lords, ladies and gentlemen, it is my sorry duty to have to tell you that Napoleon is reported marching on Brussels.
- God save the King.
- God save the King! All officers to report to their regiments immediately.
Battle begins.
Come on, let's get you back to base.
Sorry, sir.
The Duke of Wellington himself calls them the scum of the earth.
- But on the battlefield? - Lions.
You will bring George home to me? For God knows, I cannot live without him.
I will.
Let's get you inside.
My double barrel, let's say 40 guineas.
My driving cloak, sable lining, you'll get 50 pounds for that.
Duelling pistols.
My two horses, down in the stables.
Never fear.
We're not done with your aunt yet.
Come back a hero, and we'll rattle your medals in her face.
Dearest, I have calculated my current worth at 600 or 700 pounds.
Taking into account the jewellery General Tufto has given me.
I'm relieved to hear that even now you have a plan.
If the worst comes to the worst, do not fear for me.
I shall flatter Jos Sedley into giving me a seat in his carriage.
But when I'm leaving a wife at home maybe somebody else, too Oh, good Lord, I hope not.
I should like to provide for my family.
As a gentleman.
That is no laughing matter, Mrs C.
Don't cry, little woman.
I may live to vex you yet.
I must go.
You know, I'm a thousand times happier, married to you than I ever thought I could be in this world.
Let's go! Becky! "Becky, you have captured my heart.
I know you feel the same.
We must be together.
Let us fly tonight.
Yours, George" George! Don't drink any more.
Drink? There's nothing like it.
Have some yourself.
Loosen up that lantern jaw.
The enemy has crossed the river.
Can you not hear the bugles? They're just drunk, the lot of them.
Drunk or sober, they march with us in three hours, George.
Three hours? I confess, I never thought it would actually happen.
Well, it is happening! It's happening now.
Emmy.
She's safe in your rooms.
I'm leaving her with nothing.
I have no money for her.
I've ruined her life and mine.
I'm not fit to be a married man.
Go to her.
Go to her.
There's still time to put things right.
Yes.
Thank you, Peggy.
I've packed you a pint of brandy.
All the years I've served as an army wife and I've never got used to this.
I don't deserve you.
Please, just hold me close.
We march in 15 minutes, Sedley, and neither George nor I may ever come back.
Oh, you'll be fine.
You are not to stir from this town, do you hear me? You will stay here and watch over your sister, - and see that no harm comes to her.
- They're miles away.
Jos, if anything should happen to George, remember, she has no-one in the world but you.
You'll see her safely out of Brussels in the event of a defeat.
Defeat? No, impossible.
You're just trying to frighten me now.
I'm ready.
oh, dear, is she ill? Hurry, before she collapses again.
So, here we are, boys.
For crown and country.
Halt! Gentlemen, shall we? Stuff and nonsense! We are two to one, sir, against any force Boney can bring into the field.
The Prussians were two to one at Jena, and Napoleon took their army and their kingdom in a week.
The Duke shall crush him.
They say that Wellington is fled already, my lord, and that his quarters got ready for the Duke of Dalmatia.
I have it from his own maitre-d.
Rumours.
Get me my coat and cap, sir.
I shall go out and learn the truth.
Do it myself.
Not in that military coat.
You want to get caught by the French and eaten? Gad.
Are you joining the army, too, Mr Jos? Is there to be nobody left in Brussels to protect us poor women? I should like to see the action.
Any man of any spirit would.
You men.
Parting and danger are nothing to you.
Captain Crawley left me this morning as gay as if he was going to a hunting party.
Admit it.
You were going to join the army and leave us to our fate.
My dear madam, my duty keeps me here.
I can't leave that poor creature, my sister.
I hope I, too, may appeal to you for comfort and for shelter when the time comes.
I imagine you'll be the one doing the looking after, as Jos is so hopeless.
Why are you here, Rebecca? I came to see how you are.
You don't love your husband.
You would not stand there with dry eyes if you did.
Tell me.
Did I ever do you anything but kindness? - Indeed no.
- When you were poor who befriended you? - You did.
- Was I not a sister to you? You were, but Then who sent you to separate those whom God has joined together? Amelia, I protest before God His love was everything to me.
You knew it.
You wanted to rob me of it.
For shame, Rebecca! Bad and wicked woman, false friend and false wife! I have not betrayed my husband.
Have you not betrayed me? What have I done to you that you should try and take him from me? I did nothing to encourage him.
I had him for six weeks.
It was tomfoolery, it was vanity, you know how he prevented my marriage to Jos.
I couldn't resist playing him along, but nothing really happened, I swear.
Don't you dare sit there! Get up! We sat there.
My husband and I.
And I was on his knee, and his arm around my neck, and we said Our Father Who Art In Heaven, and they came and took him away.
But he promised me to come back.
- He will come back, my dear.
- Leave me.
I cannot bear the sight of you.
Mrs O'Dowd.
Mrs O'Dowd, poor little Mrs Osborne is in a desperate condition.
- I've cares of my own enough today.
- She's mad with grief.
What, she doesn't want you? Who used to be so fond of her.
No.
Oh, dear God, already.
- What is it? - Heaven defend us from all fools, it's cannon fire.
God in heaven, please bring our menfolk safe home.
We've seen an old enemy bring Becky down.
Better luck in your next life.
And we've seen a new friend raise her up until Oh, dear.
Becky's secret marriage made rich aunt Matilda rather cross.
Treasure hunter.
Revolutionary.
Our second wedding united a pair of lovers in defiance of both their families.
I will do as my honour demands.
And four happy honeymooners left one lonely hero behind.
Tonight, Becky finds a new use for old friends, and why not? This is Vanity Fair, a world where everyone is striving for what is not worth having.
- Shout when you need me.
- What I need is a valet.
In our temporary embarrassment in the financing of servants And grocers and landlords.
Damn it.
You'll just have to make do with me.
Maybe I'll leave tomorrow instead.
Tomorrow the rent collector comes and we can't pay him.
Darling, you rather urgently need to make some money, because if I'm to be a camp follower on a glorious battlefield Officers do not have camp followers.
If I'm going to be an officer's wife drinking fine wine in crystal goblets, either way, I must have pretty underthings.
How shall I concentrate on soldiering? - Coast is clear.
- No angry rent collectors, - no disappointed grocers.
- Routed by superior forces.
Shall I take Mr George's plate, sir? Take it away and lay it again tomorrow.
And every day.
Till the damn fool runs out of money and comes crawling back.
Father please don't let my brother go to war unforgiven.
I have nothing to apologise for.
Why should I say sorry to him? Because Napoleon will be upon us horse and foot before three weeks are over, and give us such a dance as to make the war up until now seem like child's play.
We are only going to Brussels, Dobbin.
Famously full of fine people and ladies of fashion.
Well, I hope you will represent our destination in that kindly light to Mrs Osborne.
Amelia will enjoy the party.
Half of London society is already there.
Dobbin it's an adventure.
Smile.
Now, what's this, crybaby? I'm I'm just writing a letter to my mother, sir.
Gad.
The poor lady is just so damned kind to me.
Now, you be a good soldier, Ensign Stubble.
Just think, sir, all the men here, sir, all their mothers and all their sweethearts How many of us will come home again? Make her proud.
I could not leave England without coming here, without taking possibly my last chance of saying something to you of truly vital importance for myself and and-and I hope, Miss Osborne, for you, too.
Captain Dobbin, I'm quite overcome.
Oh, oh, God.
Oh, no, I'm so sorry.
I I've failed to make myself clear.
I've come with someone else's happiness in mind, not my own.
Ah, Captain Dobbin.
Off to war, is it? Show them all we are not afraid of any damned Frenchman, what.
Is the quarrel of my making? What did I ever seek but his good? For which I've been toiling like a convict since the day he was born.
Still, should anything happen to him, I think I think you would never forgive yourself if you hadn't parted in charity.
George has had three times as much money from me as I warrant your father ever gave you.
My father was a grocer, sir, and I a scholarship boy.
And he never found you a West Indian bride to keep you in wealth all your long days.
I am a self-made man, but I raised my son a gentleman.
And he repays me by marrying in the gutter.
Mrs Osborne is the best creature in the world.
And no man shall insult her in my presence.
Pistols at dawn, is it? Good work, Captain Dobbin.
I hope you can live with yourself.
In a few days we'll set sail and nobody is going to send bailiffs all the way to Belgium.
I might if some scallywag owed me three months' rent.
But in the grand scheme of things, our little debts are nothing.
There's a grand scheme of things.
Some of the men marching today have been fighting this war for more than 20 years.
Survivors like you.
Someone has to win, and why shouldn't it be us? Do we not emerge the victors from every challenge? How are we going to pay for this hotel? All you have to do, my love, for my plan to work out is play your cards right.
- Point of four.
- Making.
- 39.
- Not good.
I've got 40.
I believe your Rawdon is widely famed for his skills as a player.
Everyone has to be good at something.
I think of it as a useful way of keeping all foolish gentlemen out of trouble.
Oh, Becky, we leave all our troubles behind.
Full house.
I think that's a hundred down, Osborne.
And sway.
And cast off.
Right foot first.
You never used to complain about my dancing before.
Come on.
Oh, no, no.
No, no.
Becky is always so lively.
She has a light heart, it's a good thing in a woman.
You like her better now, I'm glad.
Oh, Captain Dobbin, we've missed you.
Mrs Osborne, very glad to have found you both.
I have a letter from home for George.
- Has the old monster relented? - Becky.
It's not father's handwriting, it's odd.
It's from his lawyer.
"I am commissioned by Mr Osborne to inform you that in consequence of the marriage which you have been pleased to contract, he ceases to consider you henceforth as a member of his family.
This determination is final and irrevocable as is this settlement.
" 2,000 pounds.
- Dearest love.
- This is all your fault.
Don't speak to her like that.
He means me, not Amelia.
George! George.
Is not 2,000 pounds an immense deal of money? To a common foot soldier it's a fortune.
On and on at me, never shut up until you had me married, and ruined, and now I'm a beggar, and a married beggar, too, and it's your fault.
But you are still the luckiest man in the world.
How can you not see that? He doesn't even write himself.
He gets his lawyer to do it.
And what the devil am I to do with 2,000 pounds? I lost 140 pounds to Rawdon Crawley yesterday.
Well, George, I imagine you'll have to live on your pay.
How can a man like me do that? How am I supposed to keep up my position in the world? And, no, do not say I could live as you do, with no fun and no entertainment.
Or do you want my wife to take in soldiers' washing? Control yourself, George.
She's here.
She's cost me dearer than I ever imagined, Dobbin.
A fine manager of a gentleman's affairs you've turned out to be.
- Darling? - All is well.
Yeah.
They'll set sail tomorrow so the minute you set eyes on Captain Osborne in the morning make sure to ask him for the money before he gets on that boat.
Ship, not boat.
Oh, I correct you and you don't like it? Nonsense, I love it, just don't make a habit of it.
So, what's our plan? Once we get to Belgium, I'm going to look for new gaming partners for you.
- Very good.
- And new friends.
Useful people with more reliable pockets who are generally just less annoying.
In your spare time, Becks, can you also win us the war? Do you doubt it? Non, that is trop cher, madame, trop - much money.
- Tant pis.
I wish Becky were here.
She'd know how to make a pretty bargain.
I hope she joins us soon.
If you want female company even on our honeymoon, your wish has sadly come true.
Sure, it's Captain Osborne, and this your new lady wife? Amelia, may I present Major O'Dowd of ours.
And his lady wife, which is to say me, Peggy O'Dowd of Glenmaloney.
And now, shoo, Major O'Dowd, and you, too, Captain Osborne.
Away to the mess wit' you now.
Men! Always in the way.
Would you ever think there was a war on, Mrs Osborne? To see all these flowers.
- So many soldiers, Mrs O'Dowd.
- Lord love 'em.
Does your husband expect an actual battle very soon? Now, we are army wives, my dear.
Our sacred duty is to keep our men cheerful and try not to think about all that till the last minute.
Ah, look around you, Amelia.
Observe the quality, these are exactly the sort of people we should be moving amongst.
Such an opportunity to shine.
My Lady Bareacres, how marvellous it is to see you and how charming you look.
Do I know this young man? Captain Osborne, Mama.
Famous for flirting.
Flirting, gambling, charming all the ladies and riding into war with the King's army, at your service, my lady.
Faintly delicious whiskers.
Inferior regiment.
And married.
Fading already.
- That is the quality? - I shall invite them to dinner.
- No.
- Why the great ladies of quality should leave your pretty side for that ugly owd fellow That is General Tufto of the Household Cavalry.
I do know that, young man.
Does he have me for an utter fool? - Ach, no, Peggy.
- And there's his aide-de-camp.
Thank heavens.
That means Becky must have arrived.
Gentlemen.
My dear Mrs Crawley.
Mon generale.
Oh, you naughty man.
For the prettiest lady in the regiment, eh, Crawley? You lucky devil.
Famous frontal development.
Oh, she is changed.
George, how beautiful she looks.
All the other ladies have a bouquet.
Emmy, why didn't you have a bouquet? Might that be because you didn't buy her one? Would you stand down, old girl? I shall be quite safe, darling.
At last we are alone, Mrs Crawley.
Enter.
Captain George.
So nice of you to join us.
The general and I were rather moping in here, all alone.
- Infantryman? - Yes, sir.
Excuse me.
She's my dearest friend.
No better than she should be.
Dear me, what an old fool.
Thank you for being my knight in shining armour.
Mrs Crawley, you look ravishing.
All eyes are on you tonight.
Then all eyes are blind, for there is not a woman in Belgium prettier than your lady wife.
I don't know where everyone gets this idea that I don't appreciate her.
She is a treasure, and you, naughty man, are not worthy of her.
Bring her to me and I'll tell her myself.
Oh, come tomorrow.
You may get revenge for that 140.
Indeed.
Please.
Imagine, Amelia, our general dines this evening with the Duke of Wellington.
He is honoured.
The commander-in-chief gives at least four grand dinners a week.
He ordered an entire wagon of silver plate from London, and every day is seen in the park with a different lady on his arm.
He makes very sure we can all see that no Englishman shall lose a wink of sleep over a little Corsican.
I'm told the French have crossed the frontier.
That's more than anyone's told me.
Though I am only an officer, whereas you Whereas we are on the staff and General Tufto is a great flirt of mine, isn't he, Rawdon? Shame he doesn't play, for he is made of money.
Come on, Osborne, wipe the floor with me.
Becky, where are his rooms, the general's rooms, I mean.
Next to ours, of course.
Rawdon is his aide-de-camp.
So close? Won't people talk? My dear little creature, how can we, with our means, live at all but for a friend to share expenses? Well What? Do you suppose Rawdon is not big enough to take care of my honour? Oh, no.
I did not mean to cause offence.
None is taken.
I'm sorry.
I do find having to be charming and flirt all day and half the night gets rather wearing.
Now, what are those naughty men of ours up to? - Point of four.
- Good.
I've got 40.
Four points.
May I light it for you? You're too kind.
Lord, how I love that smell.
Play on.
Perhaps we should raise a toast to new friendships? Enjoying your meringue, Lady Bareacres? Meringue, my lord, that's what it's supposed to be.
Meringue? Mama, my digestion is possibly too refined for le continent.
It's probably not le continent that is at fault, darling.
But the societe.
Ah, the society.
And how brilliant it is.
And all on display tomorrow night.
Lady Blanche, I hope I shall have the pleasure of appearing on your card more than once.
Dance with you? As long as you save the quadrille for me, George.
Well, surely she's not invited? How could they be so rude? How can they think they are so much better than us? Because they are better than us.
They are Lord and Lady Bareacres.
Their daughter is promised to a duke of the blood.
How much did last night cost us, George? The trembling lip and the constantly on the verge of tears, it's enough to drive a man mad.
- Why can't you be more like - Like Becky? She lives off her wits, as we must learn to do.
You never liked her before she learned to flirt and toss her hair.
- Oh, for God's sake.
- Let us not quarrel.
Please, God, let us not.
George.
George, please don't go.
Sorry, sir.
The flower, monsieur? Can I have those, please? Oui, bien sur.
It's quite simple, darling.
If I don't flirt with them, they don't visit.
If they don't visit, you don't play and if you don't play, we starve.
You're just a little too good at it, Becks.
Osborne has convinced himself that you are in love with him.
Oh, Captain Osborne, so handsome, so dangerous, can I light you another cigar? If I shan't be the finest lady at the ball, I shall be the most charming.
So everyone will want to meet us and all the wealthy gentlemen will want to play you and they will all have to form an orderly queue with foolish George Osborne firmly in the rear.
Now, that is what I call a plan.
Seems that the general does not give up so easily.
They're not from the general.
They're from Captain George Osborne.
Darling, no, I mean it.
I mean it.
Not if he were the last man on earth.
Non, non, Isidor.
Careful, man.
Mr Joseph! Oh, how utterly delightful.
Miss Sharp.
Oh, my dear, are we going to a ball? Do I have time to change? Isidor, careful.
Merde! Idiot! It's Mrs Crawley now.
This is my husband, Captain Crawley of the Life Guards.
Rawdon, may I introduce Amelia's brother, Mr Sedley? You've had a truly dreadful journey, you poor thing.
Madam, the collector of Boggley Wallah was not intended by his maker for sea travel.
But how could I miss the excitement? And how do I get a ticket? Hen's teeth, old boy, sorry.
Mrs Crawley! General Tufto.
Radiant.
Oh, but poor show.
The lady deserves better, Crawley.
Oh, gosh.
This way, my dear.
Gosh, are you going to have to fight that man in a duel now? Moustaches are strictly for soldiers.
Continental soldiers.
For God's sake, man, shave them off.
Oh, sorry.
Sorry.
I'm so sorry.
My Lady Bareacres, may I request a place on your card? Shall we? We needn't know them in England.
General Tufto, Captain Rawdon Crawley, and Mrs Crawley! You wouldn't have enjoyed it anyway, Mick, you old fool.
Much happier in here writing your orders.
There'll be such a ball danced tomorrow as some of 'em has never heard the tune of.
Dearest, why do you sit here all alone and dismally unhappy? Where's your naughty Captain George? Becky, I wish our friendship was as before.
Alas, we are married women now.
George is very poor now If you don't want George to gamble with Rawdon, then just stop him.
How can I? I promised to obey him.
That stuff is just make-believe, the things you say in church.
Amelia, the days are gone when it was possible for a woman to live her whole life as a girl.
I seek a partner for the waltz.
Go on, Amelia, please your husband.
You are the dancer.
He's so brave, so clever, so handsome.
It's not his fault I make him unhappy.
No, no, don't say such things.
I've cost him his father and his fortune.
Alas, Mrs Crawley is leaving.
Everybody was looking at my wife.
Everybody was dancing with my wife.
But she shall dance home with you.
What? When? You never used to like her at all.
"Sharp by name, sharp by nature.
" Rebecca Read it.
I mean every word.
William May I call you William? You've always been very kind to me.
Please take me home.
My lords, ladies and gentlemen, it is my sorry duty to have to tell you that Napoleon is reported marching on Brussels.
- God save the King.
- God save the King! All officers to report to their regiments immediately.
Battle begins.
Come on, let's get you back to base.
Sorry, sir.
The Duke of Wellington himself calls them the scum of the earth.
- But on the battlefield? - Lions.
You will bring George home to me? For God knows, I cannot live without him.
I will.
Let's get you inside.
My double barrel, let's say 40 guineas.
My driving cloak, sable lining, you'll get 50 pounds for that.
Duelling pistols.
My two horses, down in the stables.
Never fear.
We're not done with your aunt yet.
Come back a hero, and we'll rattle your medals in her face.
Dearest, I have calculated my current worth at 600 or 700 pounds.
Taking into account the jewellery General Tufto has given me.
I'm relieved to hear that even now you have a plan.
If the worst comes to the worst, do not fear for me.
I shall flatter Jos Sedley into giving me a seat in his carriage.
But when I'm leaving a wife at home maybe somebody else, too Oh, good Lord, I hope not.
I should like to provide for my family.
As a gentleman.
That is no laughing matter, Mrs C.
Don't cry, little woman.
I may live to vex you yet.
I must go.
You know, I'm a thousand times happier, married to you than I ever thought I could be in this world.
Let's go! Becky! "Becky, you have captured my heart.
I know you feel the same.
We must be together.
Let us fly tonight.
Yours, George" George! Don't drink any more.
Drink? There's nothing like it.
Have some yourself.
Loosen up that lantern jaw.
The enemy has crossed the river.
Can you not hear the bugles? They're just drunk, the lot of them.
Drunk or sober, they march with us in three hours, George.
Three hours? I confess, I never thought it would actually happen.
Well, it is happening! It's happening now.
Emmy.
She's safe in your rooms.
I'm leaving her with nothing.
I have no money for her.
I've ruined her life and mine.
I'm not fit to be a married man.
Go to her.
Go to her.
There's still time to put things right.
Yes.
Thank you, Peggy.
I've packed you a pint of brandy.
All the years I've served as an army wife and I've never got used to this.
I don't deserve you.
Please, just hold me close.
We march in 15 minutes, Sedley, and neither George nor I may ever come back.
Oh, you'll be fine.
You are not to stir from this town, do you hear me? You will stay here and watch over your sister, - and see that no harm comes to her.
- They're miles away.
Jos, if anything should happen to George, remember, she has no-one in the world but you.
You'll see her safely out of Brussels in the event of a defeat.
Defeat? No, impossible.
You're just trying to frighten me now.
I'm ready.
oh, dear, is she ill? Hurry, before she collapses again.
So, here we are, boys.
For crown and country.
Halt! Gentlemen, shall we? Stuff and nonsense! We are two to one, sir, against any force Boney can bring into the field.
The Prussians were two to one at Jena, and Napoleon took their army and their kingdom in a week.
The Duke shall crush him.
They say that Wellington is fled already, my lord, and that his quarters got ready for the Duke of Dalmatia.
I have it from his own maitre-d.
Rumours.
Get me my coat and cap, sir.
I shall go out and learn the truth.
Do it myself.
Not in that military coat.
You want to get caught by the French and eaten? Gad.
Are you joining the army, too, Mr Jos? Is there to be nobody left in Brussels to protect us poor women? I should like to see the action.
Any man of any spirit would.
You men.
Parting and danger are nothing to you.
Captain Crawley left me this morning as gay as if he was going to a hunting party.
Admit it.
You were going to join the army and leave us to our fate.
My dear madam, my duty keeps me here.
I can't leave that poor creature, my sister.
I hope I, too, may appeal to you for comfort and for shelter when the time comes.
I imagine you'll be the one doing the looking after, as Jos is so hopeless.
Why are you here, Rebecca? I came to see how you are.
You don't love your husband.
You would not stand there with dry eyes if you did.
Tell me.
Did I ever do you anything but kindness? - Indeed no.
- When you were poor who befriended you? - You did.
- Was I not a sister to you? You were, but Then who sent you to separate those whom God has joined together? Amelia, I protest before God His love was everything to me.
You knew it.
You wanted to rob me of it.
For shame, Rebecca! Bad and wicked woman, false friend and false wife! I have not betrayed my husband.
Have you not betrayed me? What have I done to you that you should try and take him from me? I did nothing to encourage him.
I had him for six weeks.
It was tomfoolery, it was vanity, you know how he prevented my marriage to Jos.
I couldn't resist playing him along, but nothing really happened, I swear.
Don't you dare sit there! Get up! We sat there.
My husband and I.
And I was on his knee, and his arm around my neck, and we said Our Father Who Art In Heaven, and they came and took him away.
But he promised me to come back.
- He will come back, my dear.
- Leave me.
I cannot bear the sight of you.
Mrs O'Dowd.
Mrs O'Dowd, poor little Mrs Osborne is in a desperate condition.
- I've cares of my own enough today.
- She's mad with grief.
What, she doesn't want you? Who used to be so fond of her.
No.
Oh, dear God, already.
- What is it? - Heaven defend us from all fools, it's cannon fire.
God in heaven, please bring our menfolk safe home.