Welcome to Chippendales (2022) s01e04 Episode Script

1
Congratulations. You are now
Chippendales dancers.
- Blue shorts, what's your name?
- Otis.
- He is Black.
- NICK DE NOIA: Is that a problem?
STEVE BANERJEE: Customers will love it.
- OTIS: There's a protest.
- STEVE: That was fast.
Wait, you called them?
Our news story should be a full minute.
I wanna learn everything that you know.
- RAY COLON: Hey, morning.
- Who are you?
Full-time handyman,
Ray Colon at your service.
- What is this?
- BOTH: Hunkenstein.
You are my employee!
You are all my employees!
These dudes, they don't
understand the responsibilities
that come with being the boss.
Did you say you do photography?
NICK: You mind telling me
what the fuck is going on?
We're making a calendar.
It's something that I should be
in charge of.
Okay, could you step aside
so we can finish the shoot?
[NICK SCREAMS]
Can you get me on
the next flight to New York?
I will step aside.
[UPBEAT FUNK MUSIC]
Yeah, I always watch
you strut my thing ♪
DRIVER: Groovy, yeah?
[OTIS CHUCKLES]
[UPBEAT FUNK MUSIC]
Do you wanna dance ♪
[MUSIC CONTINUES ON CAR RADIO]
I just can't do it without you ♪
Oh, shit. Wh Are those the calendars?
- Yeah.
- Oh, shit. Hold on.
- Can I see one?
- Uh, yeah.
Can you open that or something?
- Got you.
- Yeah.
OTIS: Woo.
- [CHUCKLES] Ooh-hoo!
- DELIVERY MAN: You in that?
Yeah, somewhere. Hold on.
Mm-hmm.
Uh
Ah, they must be saving
the best for last, let me see.
- DELIVERY MAN: Happy holidays.
- [LAUGHS] Yeah.
Damn, those all calendars?
Uh, yeah, yeah, man. Yeah.
- RAY: Do me a favor, give me a hand?
- OTIS: Yeah, I got you.
[INSTRUMENTAL THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
[THEME MUSIC ENDS]
[FOOTSTEPS PATTERING]
- [GRUNTS] Like how many did you order?
- Not enough.
Century City Waldenbooks just called,
they got more than double
the expected pre-orders.
- Double?
- STEVE: Brentwood B. Dalton, same thing.
Calendar's not even on sale yet
and they already want more.
Wow, Mr. Banerjee, you got
a blockbuster on your hands.
Ow! [LAUGHS]
- Otis, hi.
- Hey.
I'm bumping up your Zorro,
so you're up first.
And I need you to help CJ with
his choreo.
I would do it myself,
but I have to set the lineup,
test the sound system,
wash all the G-strings,
and redo the blocking
for the caveman number
because Danny sprained his
fucking ankle doing a back flip.
- RAY: You still haven't heard from Nick?
- What do you think?
Well, what's it been, four days?
Five days, six hours and 37 minutes,
but who's counting.
- I just hope he's okay.
- I don't.
That man has abandoned us.
No warning, no notice,
no indication of when
or if he's coming back.
- I could kill him.
- Not if I beat you to it, Steve.
- Okay, come on.
- All right.
[GENTLE JAZZ MUSIC]
[RESTAURANT PATRONS CHATTERING]
NICK: Thank you.
- How's LA been treating you?
- Well.
Maybe too well.
- [CHUCKLES]
- A prisoner of his own success.
Oh, don't ever move out there.
You say it's gonna be temporary
and next thing you know,
20 years have gone by.
Eh, they'll never get me.
- NICK: Ah.
- Not till they figure out
- how to make a decent bagel.
- [CHUCKLES]
- It's not gonna happen.
- [LAUGHS]
We'll get you back out here
one of these days.
Funny, you should mention it.
That's actually what I
wanted to talk to you about.
- Oh?
- There's this thing I'm developing
that I think might be right up
your alley.
Is Nick De Noia returning
to his theatrical roots?
Well, [CLEARS THROAT]
it's a, a sort of a cabaret.
- An erotic cabaret for women.
- A strip club.
No, no, no, a show.
Dazzling choreography,
high-end production value,
songs that get stuck
in your head for days,
and, yes, naked men.
The most beautiful boys
you ever laid eyes on,
all adding up to
an entertainment extravaganza
unlike anything else out there.
And I call it US Male, M-A-L-E.
[BERNIE AND LEW LAUGHING]
And the poster, you're gonna love.
Delivery guy, gorgeous,
muscles on top of muscles,
dressed in just a pair of
tiny little mailman shorts,
box teasingly placed over his crotch,
and across the top, "US Male:
We've got your package."
- [BERNIE AND LEW LAUGHING]
- Yes, yes. [CHUCKLES]
- Eh you're serious.
- Yes. [CHUCKLES]
Wait, there's actually a place
in LA doing something similar.
Have you heard of Chippendales?
- Mm-mm.
- Chippendales?
Yeah, it's one of
the hottest clubs in LA.
Lines around the block,
a genuine sensation.
This would be like that
only bigger, better,
even more spectacular.
You know, there hasn't
been a nightclub sensation
in Manhattan since Studio 54 shut down.
This could be that.
A Studio 54 for the '80s.
And like 54,
all would be welcome, you know.
Black and white, straight and gay.
This, this, this Chippendales' place,
it's, it's a bunch of
white ladies from the valley.
This would be way more chic.
Brooke Shields and, and, and Halston.
Housewives from Massapequa
getting down and dirty
next to Grace Jones.
I mean, I really think that this
could take New York night life by storm.
I don't know.
What? Bernie, what, what
part are you not seeing?
- [SIGHS] It just seems a little
- Sleazy.
Sleazy, what? No.
No, not at all.
It's, it's, it's, it's, it's classy.
Sassy.
Folies Bergère meets Playgirl, you know?
[GENTLE JAZZ MUSIC]
[RESTAURANT PATRONS CHATTERING]
[NICK GROANS, SIGHS]
Without further ado,
let's get this party started!
[CROWD CHEERING]
Live from the world-famous
Panorama City Mall,
please welcome
the Chippendales men of 1982.
[CROWD CHEERING]
You'll have a very happy
New Year with this hunk around.
That's right.
- Ladies, it's Mr. January.
- [CROWD CHEERING]
It may be the coldest month,
but Mr. February, he brings the heat.
The forecast for this March
calls for six feet of sexy!
It's Mr. March!
IRENE:
April showers, they bring May flowers,
eggs in this Easter basket.
It's Mr. April, if you can guess
this next stud's birthday,
he'll give you an Ice N Tasty.
That's not a euphemism,
that's one of our sponsors.
- It's Mr. May.
- Oh, Otis, we're short one chair.
- Could you go grab?
- Sure.
- She's wonderful, isn't she?
- LARRY: It's Mr. July.
Otis.
- What is the matter?
- You really don't know?
- LARRY: One more time for the men of
- The calendar, Steve.
- I mean, sh
- STEVE: They love it.
Yeah. I don't know,
I guess I just find it a bit odd
that your most popular dancer,
I'm the only one left out.
- I know.
- Yeah, why?
- I should have told you.
- that was my fault.
I thought about it.
I really wanted to put you in it
'cause I loved the pictures.
But ultimately I felt it
would be bad for sales.
Bad for sales how?
Well, it's one thing
for women to enjoy you
in the privacy of the club,
but hanging in their home,
a naked Black man
in full view of their husband.
You know how white people are,
they get threatened.
- At the office, the boss can see
- I think people can handle
a shirtless Black man, Steve.
Most can, but not all.
- We want them to buy the calendars too.
- Yeah, but this isn't the South.
This isn't Mississippi
or Alabama in 1967.
Otis, Otis, not a day goes by
I don't experience
some form of racism in this city.
I assume the same is true for you.
- Yeah, yeah, of course.
- Yeah.
I guess I just,
just never expected it from you.
You can't take this personally.
- This is business.
- Business.
And in business,
there's only one color that matters.
- Do you know what color that is?
- Yeah. Yes, green.
Green! See? You get it.
LARRY: It has every flavor.
Just like the men of Chippendales,
- there's a flavor for everyone.
- Chair.
LARRY: 10% off at Ice N Tasty.
IRENE: Thank you for this.
LARRY: If you head over
there right after the show.
- [CROWD CHATTERING]
- RAY: Woo!
Are you ladies excited?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- You ready for the show, ladies?
- You excited?
- Have a good time. Hey.
- [WOMEN GIGGLING]
- Shut up! I don't care.
- You going to be okay?
- I'm fine.
- All right, kid.
Hey, don't be so angry.
Hey, you ready for a good time, huh?
Coffee? Water, anything?
WOMAN: Thank you so much.
STEVE: Uh, next. $5 please.
- Thank you.
- IRENE: Here you go.
- WOMAN: Thank you.
- Wonderful.
- Uh, $5 please.
- Hi.
- STEVE: Thank you.
- BETTY: I know him.
- OTIS: Hey.
- STEVE: $5 please.
- Otis!
- Hey, how you doing?
- Why aren't you in there?
- Uh, maybe next year.
- Uh, go right ahead. Go on.
- Oh. [BETTY CHUCKLES]
- Everybody's gonna get one, I promise.
- Uh, $5, please.
Hi. Sure.
- [BETTY GASPS]
- Wasn't she wonderful?
- No, I really
- So wonderful.
- So poised.
- STEVE: You're better than Larry.
- IRENE: Thank you, no, I wasn't.
- STEVE: Just stop.
WOMAN: I know, I know, I know. [GIGGLES]
- [UPBEAT DANCE MUSIC]
- [CROWD CHATTERING]
[WOMAN MOANING]
WOMAN: Get closer.
[GIGGLES] One on each.
- It's incredible.
- I've never seen one sell so fast.
If I could get you more,
how many would you want?
- Many as you can get.
- Two hundred?
As many as you can get.
Five hundred?
As many as you can get.
Honey everything's
coming up roses and daffodils ♪
Everything's coming up
sunshine and Santa Claus ♪
Everything's gonna be
bright lights and lollipops ♪
Everything's coming up roses ♪
For me and for you ♪
[AUDIENCE CHEERING, APPLAUDING]
Thank you.
- How'd you know?
- Lucky guess.
[NICK SCOFFS]
[GENTLE PIANO MUSIC]
Someone is waiting ♪
Cool as Sarah ♪
Easy and loving as Susan ♪
Joanne ♪
Would I know her even if I met her ♪
Have I missed her ♪
Did I let her go ♪
A Susan sort of Sarah ♪
A Jennyish Joanne ♪
Wait for me, I'm ready now ♪
I'll find you if I can ♪
Did I miss her ♪
Have I waited too long ♪
Maybe so ♪
Or maybe so is she ♪
My blue-eyed Sarah, warm Joanne ♪
Sweet Jenny, loving Susan, crazy Amy ♪
Wait for me I'll hurry ♪
Wait for me ♪
Hurry, wait for me ♪
Hurry ♪
Wait for me ♪
- [AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
- Thank you.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]
Hello?
[CHUCKLES] That was quite a performance.
- [BRADFORD SCOFFS]
- Really.
- It was magnificent.
- Thank you.
- I try.
- You succeed.
[BRADFORD LAUGHS]
That's my favorite Sondheim.
- It's so romantic.
- Really?
Mine's "Being Alive."
- Oh. [SNIFFS]
- Oh.
- [LAUGHS] Yeah.
- Wow.
- Over "Someone is Waiting"?
- Yes.
- [LAUGHS] Okay.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- Okay. Well, look,
I don't wanna fight with you about this,
- all right, I mean, we just met.
- True.
I don't wanna fight either.
[BRADFORD AND NICK GRUNTING]
We'll have Manhattan ♪
the Bronx and Staten Island too ♪
It's lovely going through the zoo ♪
Last time I fucked a guy
in his hotel room,
he turned out to be married.
Are you married?
- I was.
- Oh, really?
You know who Jennifer O'Neil is?
I know who Jennifer O'Neil is.
- Well, that's my ex.
- [BRADFORD LAUGHS]
Well, if you're gonna be closeted,
you might as well go big.
Oh, come on.
- Did you sleep with her?
- I did.
I was deeply in love with her,
in my way.
- Do your friends know you're gay?
- The good ones, yeah.
- You?
- I mean, mm
I guess I was always out.
I used to lie to the other kids
at school
and tell them my grandmother
was Coco Chanel.
[LAUGHS] Oh, my God.
That did not make me popular.
[LAUGHS] I don't know, talk
about playground bragging rights.
- Well
- That is good.
[BRADFORD AND NICK LAUGHING]
Well, look at us.
Conversation after sex feels so novel.
- Hmm?
- I don't know.
I'm usually halfway across town by now.
I guess I did something right.
Oh, you did a lot of things right.
[LIPS SMACKING]
What brings you to town, Nick?
I'm sort of pitching something.
Are you in advertising?
Close, choreography. [CHUCKLES]
- A dance man.
- Pa-cha! [LAUGHS]
- Oh.
- Yeah, I developed this thing out in LA.
This sort of male strip club
that I'm looking to maybe bring here
- in some form or other.
- Wait. The Chippendales?
You know it?
- Yes.
- What?
My sister lives in Pasadena
and she is obsessed.
The last time I was visiting,
she tried to sweet talk me
past your doorman, but he was not very
accommodating.
Oh. Oh, that's not how it's
gonna be at the new place.
All admirers of the male form
shall be welcome.
Mm. So you're gonna bring
Chippendales to New York.
Oh no, not Chippendales. US Male.
- What?
- Yeah, it's my new venture.
Bigger, better.
- I-I'm sorry.
- Even more
I'm sorry, I'm, I'm, I'm confused.
So you're here pitching
a different club in New York.
- Yeah.
- Well, why not just do Chippendales?
- Two words: "Steve Banerjee."
- Who's that?
The fucking asshole owner who
doesn't respect me or my contribution.
Who I am officially
unequivocally done with.
Okay, that's a shit reason to go solo.
Well, you haven't met the guy.
Well, the guy could be the love child
of Eva Peron and Pol Pot,
it doesn't matter.
- [LAUGHS]
- What are you talking about? Why?
- Why?
- Yeah.
Because you have something.
You have something that, that,
that people have heard of.
Do you, do you know how rare
and precious that is?
[NICK SIGHS]
Just do the Chippendales, it'll
kill here.
- [NICK GROANS]
- You'll be like 3,000 miles away
- from that guy.
- That's not far enough.
I know people with whole
second families in New York
and their LA wife doesn't have any idea.
I don't know, I I I can't.
I just, I can't.
Well, then you're a fucking idiot.
Because on top of being right
I'm also rich.
Very rich.
[NICK LAUGHS]
I am saying the right word,
but you're not understanding.
I've got customers.
Yeah, well, so do I.
But they're ahead of you in queue.
- Well, are they calendars?
- Because calendars are seasonal.
Yeah, I understand how calendars work.
Well then, you know people
don't buy calendars all year round.
There's a limited sales window
and we are in it right now.
Look, I printed exactly
the number you asked for.
The fact that now you want more
is really not my problem.
What is the soonest you could do?
[SIGHS] I honestly have no idea.
- Rough estimate.
- Uh, three, four weeks.
Four weeks?
Look, if it was a couple hundred
maybe, but 10,000.
An order that big should take priority.
Well, unfortunately it doesn't
work like that.
Like I said, I got other customers.
What if you didn't?
[BACKSTAGE CHATTERING]
Fuck, fuck, fuck,
fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
- Oh, God.
- HOUSE MANAGER: Where the hell is he?
LARRY: Ladies,
he'll be out in just a moment.
- HOUSE MANAGER: Yeah, I'm on it.
- [DENISE GROANS]
Bruce, let's go, baby,
you're missing your solo.
I got an empty stage. No empty stages.
- Let's go, go, go.
- [DENISE GROANS]
- Small situation.
- [CHUCKLES]
Oh, are you kidding?
Oh my God, this is what I've
been saying all the time.
You guys, this is why you
don't eat in your costume.
CJ, you and the fucking pastrami.
- It's just so tasty.
- Well, you eat before a show.
- Okay, okay.
- [CHUCKLES]
- [DENISE GASPS]
- [PHONE RINGS]
- Uh, I'm not taking it.
- I realize you're busy but
I don't care if it's the fucking Pope,
I'm working.
It's Nick.
DANCER: Yeah, come on. Triceps.
Ladies love my triceps.
Okay. [CLEARS THROAT]
You better be fucking dead
or very badly injured.
Pack your bags, baby.
We're headed to the Big Apple.
[SCOFFS] Oh, is that where you've been?
That's where you've been
hiding all this time.
NICK: Well, I don't know, you tell me.
Hold please.
- [PEDESTRIANS CHATTERING]
- WOMAN: Hey, taxi!
- [LAUGHS] You hear that?
- [BRADFORD LAUGHS]
- Hear all those hookers and tourists?
- [LAUGHS]
How much blow have you done tonight?
NICK: None, not a bump.
- [NICK LAUGHS]
- Three.
Fine, maybe a bump.
So Denise, what do you say?
I don't understand,
what happened to you quitting,
wanting to open your own place,
leaving Steve?
This is the best of both worlds.
We'll be 3,000 miles away
while still getting the benefit
of the Chippendales' name.
I'm going to assume you
haven't told Steve this idea.
Well, not yet.
DENISE:
Well, he's never gonna go for it.
Why not?
DENISE: First of all,
the fact that it was your idea
- is gonna make him instantly suspicious.
- [SCOFFS, BLOWS RASPBERRY]
And then there's the fact that
you wouldn't be in his sight.
The guy's a psycho control freak.
He's not just going to hand over
the world's biggest city
to somebody he deeply mistrusts.
Well, I, look,
I-I-I get why you're skeptical.
- I do, I do.
- And then there's the money, okay?
Launching your own place,
it's so expensive,
especially in New York City.
Are you kidding? The overhead?
He won't have to take on
a drop of financial risk.
All he has to do is just
sit there in his weird suit
and watch the money roll in.
- This is the coke talking.
- You're making no sense.
Well, it does if you find a backer,
which it so happens,
- Denise, I have done.
- A backer.
NICK: Yes, in this case,
a very spoiled rich kid
with a huge bank account.
All right,
you sexy animals, it's go time.
- Hoo!
- [CHUCKLES] Yeah.
And a huger cock.
Bradford Barton.
This is real, a real plan.
And I genuinely think I can get
Steve on board.
Okay, well, I have a alternative plan.
Why don't you come back here
and do your fucking job
so I don't have to?
[PHONE SLAMS]
- [PHONE TONE]
- [CLICKS TONGUE] Fuck.
[CROWD CHEERING]
LARRY: How are you ladies?
Are you ready to have the
greatest night of your lives?
Make some noise!
Welcome to Chippendales!
Who's ready to party?
- [CROWD CHEERING]
- Here he is, ladies,
your luscious chocolate fantasy
come to life.
The freakiest freak this side of Harlem,
the brother like no other,
the pimp who'll make you limp,
the daddy with a Caddy.
All the ladies, give it up for Otis!
- ["SUPER FREAK" BY RICK JAMES PLAYING]
- [CROWD CHEERING]
Gosh, I wish I could do what he does.
Ladies, take this night to the top.
Anytime someone shows up
in a purple-colored hat,
you know it's gonna get freaky
up in here.
Come on, make some noise.
- [CROWD CHEERING]
- Oh, I like that slow gyration.
One, two, skip a few,
right to the sexy time.
I've seen a few of those in my
own mirror.
Okay, here you go. Have a good night.
LARRY: And here comes
two half-naked friends
willing to take things up a notch.
Couple turns, and there goes the coat.
Just in time.
Touch yourself if you want
but if you want a taste,
that's gonna cost ya.
All these men Oh, my God!
Look at those butt cheeks!
You knew it was coming.
Don't act surprised.
How about a brush to the face,
table for one.
Steve, people are loving
these calendars.
That's amazing.
Women love to know what date it is
and naked men.
I have to tell you something,
come upstairs with me.
- Okay. Hey, Doug, can you take over?
- Got it.
LARRY: And now you
have the stories to share.
- STEVE: Come, come.
- Okay.
- Steve?
- Come, come. There's
- Oh, where were you?
- Come sit here. Sit down.
- I have some very exciting news.
- Okay.
You know that printing press
that makes our calendars?
- Yes.
- I bought it. [CHUCKLES]
- You bought it?
- Uh-huh.
They weren't making
the calendars fast enough
because they have other customers
and so I addressed the problem.
Was it for sale, Steve?
- No.
- Then how did you buy it?
You know that film "The Godfather"?
- Mm-hmm.
- In it there's a character,
he's one of the gangsters, he says,
"I made him an offer he can't refuse."
I did that.
That's what I did.
Steve, how much did you spend?
- It doesn't matter.
- It absolutely matters.
The club's finances are my department
and you made a massive purchase
without even consulting me.
I have big plans for the calendars.
I want to go national starting
next year.
And with our own printing press,
we'll be able to print as
many calendars as we want.
In business, that's known as
controlling the means of production.
- Steve, I didn't run the numbers.
- I ran the numbers.
It works, it's really good.
I am a king. You are my queen.
LARRY: Grab your hair and pull yourself
if you can't be in
the middle of the stage!
Ladies and gentlemen,
the great and powerful Otis!
Make some noise!
[CROWD CHEERING]
This is the man that you come for.
Are you not having the time of
your life?
All night long.
You show the money,
he'll show you the moves.
- That's how it works.
- Thanks. Yeah.
LARRY:
One more time for Otis, everybody!
There he goes.
Ladies, I hope you brought a towel
and a change of panties.
OTIS: Shit.
- Almost there. Here we go.
- [RESTAURANT PATRONS CHATTERING]
Three, two, one.
- Do you know where you are?
- Um, a
- a restaurant?
- Not just any restaurant.
The Palisade Club.
- Oh.
- [GASPS] It's the hottest spot in town.
All the celebrities come here
to see and be seen.
Warren Beatty, Natalie Wood, Gil Gerard.
- May I help you.
- Table for two, please.
- Do you have a reservation?
- I do not.
It's time we started acting the part.
[SCOFFS] The part of what?
The fantastically
successful people we are.
We have one of the hottest
night clubs in the city,
a top-selling calendar, and as of today,
a printing press capable of
I'm sorry. It seems we
have nothing available.
Oh, what about that one over there?
Oh, that's for parties of four.
- Okay.
- Oh, what about this one right here?
Uh, that one is reserved for members.
- Members?
- My usual table.
Oh, how do I get one of those?
Well, [CHUCKLES] there is a process.
- A process?
- You have to apply.
- Great, may I please have an application?
- It's not quite so d
You need a member to sponsor you.
- Is that so?
- Let's just go someplace else.
No, I want to eat here.
Unless for some reason
we are not welcome here.
- Sir?
- I wonder do any of your members
happen to have brown skin?
Because from the looks of it
I assure you, this club
welcomes people of all
Oh, you can assure me?
You know what you can do with
your membership application?
You can take it, and you can
shove it up your ass!
Hey, stop it. Steven.
Shame on you.
[GENTLE DRAMATIC MUSIC]
- DENISE: Yeah, well, if-if you sync
- Slower, they give more money.
You get more money if you
synchronize and it's, uh, good.
RICHIE: Well, uh,
the other two could get better.
Just show me the routine
that you guys worked on.
- Focus.
- Five, six, seven, eight. Zo-da-do-da-do.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, why don't
we do like a bartending move?
Like shot, shot, shot,
shot, shot, shot, shot.
Get the fuck out of here.
- What are you
- [DANCERS LAUGHING]
All right, all right, I'm sorry,
I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry.
- What? Do you dance now?
- We got this one too.
- Hip.
- That's
- You love that one.
- That's kinda good.
- Woo!
- [DANCERS CHATTERING]
- MAN: Hey, hey. Check it out.
EMPLOYEE: Hey, it's Nick.
- [NICK EXHALES]
- DENISE: And then, I
- I want a, like a stomp.
- To the right. To the left.
- DANNY: Oh, I gave her a black eye
- Suspense.
- Hip.
- We're holding.
Um, I think that, yeah,
we hold, we feel it,
- and maybe a cover
- Nice job, guys.
- RITCHIE: Oh, shit.
- DANCER: Hey! No way.
[DENISE EXHALES]
- [DANCERS CHUCKLING]
- RICHIE: Oh, sh
[DENISE SIGHS, SOBS]
- Oh! [LAUGHING]
- [DENISE LAUGHING]
- [DOOR CLOSES]
- Well, well, well, look who's back.
[NICK SIGHS]
We're opening a Chippendales
in New York.
- Excuse me.
- NICK: And I'm gonna run it.
- What?
- NICK: And if you have a problem with
- I don't think
- And if you have a problem with that,
I'll open my own place.
A competing club. US Male, M-A-L-E.
See that's what I've been up to
the past few weeks.
I've been out in New York
meeting with investors,
top Broadway guys and guess what?
They ate it up with a spoon.
Checkbooks out, ready to finance.
Not a soft cock in the room.
[CHUCKLES] So, ahem
Basically the way I see it,
you've got two choices:
You and me stick together
and take the Big Apple by storm,
or you and me go to war.
[CHUCKLES]
I take my talent and my vision,
not to mention
half the dancers in this club,
and I become your biggest
competitor and worst nightmare.
It will be ugly, Steve.
Blood will spill.
Everything you've worked so hard
to build
will be in jeopardy.
Existential fucking peril, man. [SIGHS]
Those are your choices.
I know which one I prefer.
But I'm more than willing
to take the other.
[GENTLE DRAMATIC MUSIC]
- Bruce.
- Traffic on the 405.
I don't care. You have five minutes.
[DANCERS CHATTERING]
So?
- STEVE: Well, he's back.
- IRENE: Nick?
- At long last, returned from exile.
- Oh, thank God.
- Where was he? What was he doing?
- I have no idea.
You didn't talk to him?
- I did.
- What did he say?
What did you say?
I made him an offer he couldn't refuse.
IRENE: What did you say?
I told him I never
wanted him to step foot
in this club ever again.
- You fired him?
- No, I transferred him.
You transferred him where?
To my best idea yet.
Our soon-to-open New York Chippendales.
- [UPBEAT MUSIC]
- [CROWD CHEERING]
I love you! [LAUGHS]
- [CROWD CHEERING]
- We're going to New York!
- [NICK AND DENISE SCREAM]
- [IRENE SCREAMS]
- Here's to New York fuckin' city!
- To New York!
- NICK: Yes!
- Oh!
- [CROWD CHEERING]
- [UPBEAT MUSIC]
[CROWD CHATTERING]
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
- [MUFFLED MUSIC]
- [FOOTSTEPS PATTERING]
- OTIS: Hoo!
- RAY: What you thinking?
- OTIS: Man, I don't even usually like
- [RAY LAUGHS]
[OTIS LAUGHS]
RAY: I told you to stick with me, kid.
- Yeah, I got you.
- OTIS: That's August right there, right?
RAY: That's a August theme right there.
- This is really Bro, look at that right there.
- Ooh!
- [CHUCKLES] Oh, Mr. Banerjee.
- Hey.
- What is this?
- I'm, uh, I'm making a calendar.
Calendar?
Yeah.
Yeah, you ain't got
a problem with that do you?
With you making a competing calendar?
- Nah, not competing, no.
- You said he'd be okay with this.
Okay. [CHUCKLES]
- So let me get this straight
- You say he'd love it.
I can't be in your calendar and can't
- [SCOFFS] I can't do my own?
- Mr. Banerjee, I swear to God
- STEVE: Shut up, Ray.
- If I had known that you didn't want th
Shut up, Ray. Get out.
[TENSE DRAMATIC MUSIC]
What makes you think
you could do this to me?
I'm, I'm following you.
I'm following you,
what you taught me. I'm
You know, I [SIGHS] I've been
meaning to ask you something.
Did you ever consider hiring
another Black dancer?
Of course not.
'Cause one Black dancer, that's, that's,
that's good for business,
but two, that might
might attract the wrong element.
- You can't take this stuff personally, Otis.
- [OTIS SCOFFS]
I know. I know.
It's, it's, it's just business.
[OTIS CLEARS THROAT]
Good, uh, [EXHALES]
good luck to you, Steve.
- STEVE: What do you mean?
- [OTIS SIGHS]
Where are you going?
- You're not fired.
- I know.
[SCOFFS] I quit.
[GENTLE DRAMATIC MUSIC]
- [GLASSES CLINKING]
- [CROWD CHATTERING]
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
[CHUCKLES] Mm. Cheers!
- Mm! I gotta get a winter coat!
- DENISE: Me too!
I can't remember the last time
I was in cold weather.
NICK:
We should go coat shopping together!
DENISE: Matching black leather.
Ugh, so New York.
Look at this place.
- I'm gonna miss it.
- Mm-hmm. [CHUCKLES]
Yeah, hey. Oh that's Hey, Otis.
- Otis, come here, man.
- DENISE: Otis.
NICK: Hey, hey, did you hear
the good news?
Uh, good news? Nah.
- [NICK LAUGHS]
- We are going to New York.
- Yeah!
- [NICK LAUGHS]
- Who?
- Chippendales.
- Me, Denise. Maybe you, man.
- OTIS: Uh
You could, uh, you know, split your time
- half-half.
- Uh, New York?
- Yeah.
- Yes, honey.
- No.
- [NICK LAUGHS]
Nah, man, I, uh, I'm done.
Done? As in, as in
No, no, no. Hold on.
You are, you're saying you're quitting.
- Yeah, yeah, I, uh
- NICK: Oh, shit.
I I can't deal with that
dude anymore.
Man, I can't, I can't have
that in my life, you know?
- I hear you, I hear.
- Well, listen, come to New York with us.
You'd be 3,000 miles from him.
- Come on.
- That's it! That's I
Nah, 3000 miles is not enough.
- Oh.
- I gotta, I gotta just
I gotta do my own thing, you know?
I'll see y'all down the road somewhere.
- NICK: You will, yeah.
- DENISE: Okay. All right.
NICK: Come east, young man.
- [OTIS CHUCKLES]
- DENISE: Yes!
- [NICK LAUGHS]
- [PEOPLE CHATTERING]
DON: Come on, man.
- I mean, [SCOFFS] no.
- DON'S FRIEND: That's just not true.
- People keep getting past us.
- DON: Like, just, just come on, man.
You've been saying that you're at
capacity for the last hour.
I mean, just help me out!
DON'S FRIEND:
And people keep going past us.
[PEOPLE CHATTERING]
- Do you have a card?
- A what?
- A card.
- A card, a card? What card?
A membership card.
- Wait a minute, a membership?
- Since when have you had
- membership cards?
- What are you talking about?
- I have no clue what you're
- Thank you. It's about
- Excuse me, guys.
- Fellas, right this way.
- DON: Wait. What?
- Excuse me, let them in.
Thank you. Thank you, enjoy.
Wait, hold, hold up.
- How do I get that card?
- We'll pay.
Well, it's a process.
They tell me that you are a tiger ♪
Did I tell you I'm a tamer ♪
Sure I think it's gonna take
a little longer than planned ♪
I've got you backed into a corner ♪
Yeah, my love is getting stronger ♪
- [DOOR KNOCKING]
- Yes.
[DOOR LATCH CLICKING]
I fucked up.
Big time, you know.
I should've known, I-I should've
I should've seen that
there was treachery afoot.
Of course you're not cool
with no competing calendar.
Why would you be?
You gave Otis a chance.
You took him under your wing
and look how he did you.
That ain't right.
I ain't never been the boss
or nothin' before, but I
I seen enough movies to know
that when you the king,
there's gonna be snakes in the grass.
People wanna take you down
and steal your crown.
But what I want you to know
from the bottom of my heart
is you ain't gotta worry
about that with me.
No matter what shady scheming
bullshit is going down,
there's always one person
who'll have your back.
I, Ray Colon, I kneel before you today
offering my everlasting oath of loyalty.
[UPBEAT DRAMATIC MUSIC]
[MUSIC CONTINUES]