Arthur (1996) s01e05 Episode Script

1
Every day when you're
walking down the street ♪
Everybody that you meet
has an original point of view. ♪
( laughs )
And I say hey! ♪
Hey!
What a wonderful kind of day ♪
If we could learn
to work and play ♪
And get along
with each other ♪
You got to listen
to your heart ♪
Listen to the beat ♪
Listen to the rhythm,
the rhythm of the street ♪
Open up your eyes,
open up your ears ♪
Get together and make things
better by working together ♪
It's a simple message
and it comes from the heart ♪
Believe in yourself ♪
For that's the place
to start ♪
And I say hey! ♪
Hey!
What a wonderful kind of day ♪
If we could learn
to work and play ♪
And get along
with each other. ♪
Hey!
What a wonderful kind of day ♪
Hey! What a wonderful
kind of day. ♪
Hey!
ARTHUR:
Hey, D.W.
Hey!
Whoa!
( crash )
I'm the kind of boy
who should have a dog.
A dog can be very helpful.
( crying )
Oh, no!
How will Kate get down?
Save Kate, boy.
( barks )
Ah
What would we have done
if you didn't have a dog?
But I never expected this.
( snarling )
( barking )
Hi.
( humming )
( in singsong voice ):
Arthur wants a dog
Don't say anything, D.W.
I haven't asked Mom and Dad.
You can trust me, Arthur.
So what's new?
Arthur wants a puppy.
D.W.!
A puppy is a big responsibility.
I would feed and walk it
and play
with it.
We'll think
about it.
That means no.
What about
our new carpet?
Mom's saying
she doesn't want
to have a puppy tree
on the new carpet?
Ugh whoa
Just felt like dancing.
La, la, la, la, la. ♪
DAD:
Arthur
you may have
a puppy
if you can take
care of it.
Yes!
My own puppy!
Thanks!
First, show us
you're responsible.
Huh?
How can I ever prove
that I'm responsible?
Get a job.
then you can pay back
my seven
dollars.
A job?
What kind of job
can I get?
You could work for my dad.
He needs a car salesman.
Hmm.
Hmm.
What kind
of engine is this?
I don't know.
I've never been
able to see it.
Gee, Muffy, I don't think so.
Why not get a job
at Joe's Junkyard
crushing old cars?
Do something
you like.
That gives me
an idea!
If I can take care of
other people's pets
I can take care
of my own.
"Arthur's Pet Business."
"Call Arthur Read."
I'll take these.
I've got the rest.
Whoa ah oh!
"Arthur's Pet Business."
We're putting
up signs
for my business.
We could give some
to people we know.
Great!
Hmm.
My, what a cute baby.
Hello.
Arthur's Pet Business.
I'm Arthur.
Arthur's Pet Business.
I'm Arthur.
MOM:
Arthur?
Time for bed.
Mom!
Just ten more minutes?
Arthur
( phone rings )
Hello?
Arthur's Pet Business.
May I help you?
Dad! Dad!
I got my first
customer!
Congratulations.
Who is it?
I'm going to watch
Mrs. Wood's dog
and earn ten dollars.
isn't that the dog
the mailman
calls "Jaws"?
Nasty little Perky?
( snarling )
WOMAN:
Come in.
Oh, don't mind Perky.
She hasn't
been herself lately.
( growling )
I have
two lists:
This is Perky's
daily schedule
and this is the list
of all the things
Perky does not like.
I'll be back
next Sunday
sweetie furry-facey
poopy baby.
I'll take
good care of her.
( growling )
We'll be the best of friends.
( snarling )
( timer rings )
Time for brushing.
( growling )
ARTHUR:
96 97
98 99
One hundred.
See, she's happy.
( snarling )
( timer rings )
ARTHUR:
One tablespoon
of chicken
one-quarter tablespoon
of liver
( growling )
the very exact middle
of a cheeseburger
no pickle,
and a cherry on top.
( snarling )
( sniffing )
What's wrong?
I followed the instructions.
Oh, no, I forgot the parsley.
( evil cackle )
MAN ( on television ):
We've got him.
This is the
end of you,
Bionic Bunny.
( cackles )
( timer rings )
( groans )
( humming )
( timer rings )
Not now!
( snarling )
Now what's wrong?
( sighs )
Are you sure
you want a dog?
If I can handle Perky,
I can handle any pet.
Prunella is here-- she wants you
to take care of her ant farm.
Tuesday night's
their barn dance.
Here's their music.
Hmm.
Arthur, I think
your ads worked.
( snarling )
( animals making noise )
Arthur
don't worry, Dad.
I'll work out
all their schedules somehow.
( snake hissing )
( shrieking )
Help!
D.W.?
Uh-oh.
Oh, no!
The ant farm!
No! Kate!
Don't!
( bawling )
( growling )
( chirping wildly )
( gasps )
Oh, no!
Hey, wait!
Hey, where are you going?
( screeching )
Huh?
Come here!
Arthur!
Arthur
Arthur
( frog croaks )
Okay, you, stay down here.
( snake hissing )
( sighs )
( timer rings )
Time to walk Perky.
D.W., how would you
like to be my assistant?
I'll pay you
two dollars.
Arthur, you know I'd do
anything for you for money.
Let's say three dollars a week.
Deal!
Good morning.
What did you do to "Jaws"?
I've been taking
good care of her.
I keep her
on schedule.
I've never seen
her angry like this.
I did everything right.
( snarling ferociously )
I did do everything right.
( growling )
But now you're
even more unfriendly.
Maybe I'm just not a dog person.
When Mrs. Wood picks
you up tomorrow
she'll tell everyone
I wrecked her dog.
D.W.:
I bet you're
happy today.
Why?
You get rid of Perky
and earn ten dollars.
But I found out
I can never have a puppy.
I wreck dogs.
Mrs. Wood called.
She's on her way.
( groans )
I'll go get Perky.
Has anybody
seen Perky?
She's not in the living room.
I didn't hear
her growl
all morning.
Neither did I.
Perky, Perky!
Come here, Perky!
She's not
downstairs.
She's not
outside.
You're in trouble now.
I wreck dogs and lose them.
Now I know I should
never have a dog.
( doorbell rings )
MOM:
Mrs. Wood.
Please, come in.
Hi, Mrs. Wood.
Guess what?
Arthur lost Perky.
What? Perky!
My helpless
little baby's
out in the world alone
and unprotected?
I feel sorry
for the world.
ARTHUR:
Hey, everybody,
come here!
Over here!
Perky had puppies!
Ooh
WOOD:
Look how comfortable
you made her.
How can I
ever thank you?
A reward would be nice.
Shh D.W.!
Here, this is
the money I owe you.
And how would you like
a puppy as a reward?
A puppy?
DAD:
Of course
you earned it.
My own puppy!
I can't
believe it!
What should I name him?
Ten dollars.
That's weird.
Why would I name it that?
That's what you owe me
seven dollars plus three
for being an assistant.
That comes to ten dollars.
KIDS:
And now
Hi.
Our company name
is Pet Co. Pet's.
Company name,
Pet Palace.
GIRL:
We're making up
our own pet businesses.
We started a business.
We made our
own companies.
We have to present
our businesses.
( giggling )
The company name
is Pet Palace.
We had to come up with a logo
and what the name is.
What pets we will sell.
Dragons,
unicorns,
puppies
guinea pig,
hamster
snakes with wings
lobsters
dinosaurs
tarantulas
lions, squirrels
and rhinoceroses.
Then you had to do
a song at the end.
Pets, pets, pets, pets ♪
Would you like a little dog? ♪
You have to be responsible.
It's a big job.
There's a new
pet store.
Let's go see it.
You got to put
a good price.
You can't put a penny
for a exotic parrot.
How much is
this baby dinosaur?
It's $50 thank you.
And make sure
you satisfy everybody.
We forgot
to get food.
I'll give you it free.
Thank you.
You're welcome.
Come on! Come on! ♪
Come down to pet palace ♪
We have everything for sale. ♪
ALL:
Go to Pet Paradise or else.
I mean it.
And now
( D.W. humming )
( gasps )
Mom!
D.W.'s drawing
in my book!
Mom, stop her!
They forgot
the colors
so I'm putting
them in.
They're supposed
to be that way!
Sometimes I imagine
how great life would be
if D.W. was different.
Like if she were
more like The Brain.
I'll do that homework for you.
All done--
let's play ball.
( Arthur laughs )
ARTHUR:
Or more like the Bionic Bunny.
Ta-dah!
I'll take you to get air!
Put your
helmet on.
I'd even like her better
if she were more like a donkey.
Hee-haw, hee-haw!
Giddyap, D.W.!
Go, go!
Hee-haw!
Boy, I wish
I had a sister
who was a donkey like D.W.
Hee-haw!
Any change would be
an improvement.
( glass breaks )
ANNOUNCER:
More annoying
than a mosquito
Ta-dah!
( giggling )
( laughing )
( big sigh )
Something wrong, honey?
I'm bored.
None of my friends can play.
Why don't you go play with D.W.?
( sighs )
Huh?
I'm not
that
desperate.
Well, only if she promises
not to be annoying.
I won't do anything
that's annoying.
If I'm even a little, teeny
eenie-weeniest bit annoying
tell me and I'll stop.
Okay, okay!
( whispers ):
Please notice
I'm not being annoying.
Bottom of the ninth.
Arthur Read is one out away
from a perfect game.
( sneezing
noise )
Huh? What are
you doing?
It's Princess Sneeze-and-Wet's
turn at bat.
N-o! No!
There are no babies
in baseball.
What if they were
really good?
This is America.
Everybody gets an equal chance.
Why do I play with you?
Go play
with Kate.
You're a baby.
Am not!
You act
like it.
Do not!
Can Kate do this?
( grunting )
Whoa
( grunts )
Don't change
that channel!
I have to watch Bionic Bunny.
It's the back-to-back
three-part episode.
( both growl )
He travels
through time
to fight the
( growling )
giant prehistoric
mechanical cave
( grunts )
Bunny-saurus.
Mary Moo Cow
was just
explaining
green.
MOM:
Excuse me--
I'm on the phone.
Arthur's stopping me
from watching
educational TV.
It's time for
I'll never
understand green.
Who got there first?
( sighs )
( Arthur moans )
You don't like doing
things with me.
You like boring things.
I wish you liked
to do things
more like me.
Then you'd want to play with me?
Sure.
I've got your favorite, D.W.--
banana and
peanut butter.
Yum!
I want watermelon!
I want watermelon,
too!
Want to go on
the swings, D.W.?
Yeah!
Want to play catch,
Dad?
I do, I do!
( dog barks )
( grunts )
Oops.
( groans )
TV ANNOUNCER:
The Bionic Bunny Show!
created by a combination
of super-science
and radical animal husbandry
to fight crime
Bionic Bunny hops into action
for goodness' sake.
BUNNY:
The room's filling
with water.
I'll drown
unless I drink it all.
Are you
watching that?
Uh-huh.
Not Mary Moo Cow?
That's a
kiddy show.
Bo-ring.
( water splashing on TV )
( gasps )
( gasps )
( laughs )
( laughs )
That was great!
That was great!
Aren't you going
to watch
Foreign Metallic
Spelunking Squad?
Okay-- you want some ice cream?
Yeah!
I hope you two aren't fighting
over the TV.
No, D.W.'s finally
got good taste.
I'm going
to try on
my new
clothes.
( dog barks )
D.W.:
Do you like
them, Arthur?
I picked them out myself.
Don't you already have
clothes like that?
No.
They look
familiar.
I call that
my built-in escape claws.
( laughs )
( laughs )
Do you even know
what that
means?
Of course.
( sighs )
( sighs )
( boys scream )
Stop doing
everything
I do.
We just happen to be interested
in the same things.
Hmm
Hi, guys.
I'll go get my bike.
Hi, guys.
I'll go get my bike.
Am I seeing double?
Was that
Arthur's sister?
Or some
frightening
scientific
experiment
gone horribly
wrong?
BUSTER:
Arthur, what's
with D.W.?
ARTHUR:
She has to
come with me.
Mom and Dad are shopping.
No, I meant the
are those my old glasses?
No, I punched the lenses out of
my sunglasses.
Why is D.W. dressed
like you?
I don't know.
She's driving
me crazy.
BUSTER:
Last one to the Sugar Bowl
is a henway.
Arthur, wait for me!
You're last,
Arthur.
You're a henway.
What's a henway?
About five pounds.
( all laugh )
Wait for me!
We're going to get a table.
Hi, Arthur.
Hi, Arthur.
Huh?
Oh,
there's
two of you.
Want a baby seat?
That would be
a thoughtful thing to ask
if there was a baby here!
You cut it out, D.W.
You just
look weird.
You can't
fool me, Arthur.
There aren't two of you--
who's this?
I'm Arthur.
That's my sister.
( laughs )
You look like
a ring-tailed
dufus.
I've been trying
to tell her that.
Those are the goofiest
clothes and shoes
and glasses I ever saw.
( laughing )
Hey
Mom, Dad, can we move and not
tell D.W. where we're going?
No.
Why?
She's driving me crazy!
It's like having a twin
or an extra shadow
or a weird sister
who follows me.
Yesterday I heard
the kids talking
don't tell Arthur
everyone's invited
to my house after
school to swim.
Why not tell Arthur?
His sister
Arthur junior,
will tag along.
Maybe you should
tell D.W.
how you feel.
Me? Why can't you?
This is between
you two.
I guess you're right.
Want to
come over
and watch Vegetables
Sing the ABC's?
It's the sequel to Freddie Fruit
Counts By Twos.
No, that's
for babies.
It's not!
They sing them
backwards, too!
r-q-z-y-o-l-p! ♪
z-z-g-y-w-p! ♪
z-z-g-y-w-t-p! ♪
r-q-z-y-o-l-p! ♪
No, I'm playing soccer
with Arthur.
Sounds boring.
Yeah
I-I mean, no,
it's grown-up.
Yuck!
Yuck!
ARTHUR:
D.W.
you don't even like
the things I do.
Why don't you
give us both a break
and stop copying me?
you think I should do
the things I like?
Yes, exactly!
Instead of
the interesting
things you like?
Okay, okay, I'm sorry I said
everything you like is boring.
You'll still play
with me sometimes?
Sure.
Finally, I can change
these clothes!
And Mom said
I can watch Mary Moo Cow
every day
for as many days as you
watched Bionic Bunny.
Why do I feel
like I got tricked?
( barks )
What a wonderful
kind of day ♪
If we could learn
to work and play ♪
And get along
with each other ♪
You got to listen
to your heart ♪
Listen to the beat ♪
Listen to the rhythm,
the rhythm of the street ♪
It's a simple message
and it comes from the heart ♪
Believe in yourself ♪
For that's the place
to start ♪
And I say hey! ♪
Hey! What a wonderful
kind of day ♪
If we could learn
to work and play ♪
And get along
with each other ♪
Hey! What a wonderful
kind of day! ♪
Hey! ♪