Betty (2020) s01e05 Episode Script

1
Improved by KID
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KIRT:
You guys got booked!
HONEYBEAR: You threw
a skateboard through a window.
So would you rather have it be
that I did get arrested?
- Yes!
- Yes!
How much do I owe you?
You bailed me out.
Totally forgot.
I'm on this date right now,
with this girl, Ash.
I'm trying not to screw it up.
You're not screwing it up.
Where'd I leave my pens?
Your weed pens?
You got 48 hours. After that,
I can't protect you anymore.
I come bearing gifts.
Frankly, mushrooms
isn't gonna fix this.
Fine, it's like that then.
JANAY: Yo,
you need to watch your mouth!
Your boy needs to watch
his hands.
JANAY: I'll meet her,
wherever she wants,
I wanna hear her out.
YVETTE: I ended up
crashing at the party.
Donald had his hand in my pants.
JANAY: She's telling the truth.
How can you be sure?
He did the same thing to me.
- Can I help you?
You're welcome.
Perstephanie?
I didn't say anything
because we had just
started dating,
and I didn't want him to think
that I didn't like him
or that I wasn't down.
So, like
- Yeah.
I feel that.
- And
as much as I love the dude, I
I can't stop thinking
that I don't know.
If I had just known
more before, like
this wouldn't have happened
to Yvette.
- No, Janay.
You can't blame yourself
for that.
Look at me.
You can't blame yourself
for this.
It's not your fault.
- Maybe you could
say something to him now.
- Yeah, you're right.
I should talk to him.
- Yo, I have this crazy clip
of my homey
just eating shit on that spot.
- Doing what?
- Like, he he, like, landed.
He landed the ollie
and then did a powerslide
Bink just straight on his face.
- My G
- Hey!
- Hey.
- Yo!
How's it going?
Caught some clips, Honeybear?
- Yeah, I was just talking
to Janay about that.
- Where's Kirt?
- In a time-out.
- What is she, like, five?
- Basically.
Indigo.
- Thank you for bailing me out,
and I'll pay you back.
Okay.
- What's up, jailbirds?
- Bambi! What's good?
- You been good?
- Yeah, you know,
we had a time in there,
but whatever doesn't kill you
makes you stronger.
- Yo, my boy once offered
to suck a guard's dick
to use the bathroom solo.
- Come on, why you bringing
that up right now?
- What the fuck?
- Yo, I'm serious.
- Yo, what's up with you
not posting Camille's bail?
- No.
- It's okay.
It's totally fine.
So sorry.
You should have offered
to suck the guard's dick
to get her out, right?
- Yeah.
Yeah.
- Yo, that's OD.
- You ladies got jokes.
Okay.
Hey, we're going to Blue Park,
Camille.
You coming?
- Aw, come on, baby,
we're just playing.
- Yo, I know.
It's all right.
It's all good.
You coming with?
- Yeah, after I finish
my drink, I'll be there.
- All right.
- Catch y'all later.
All right, peace out, Camille.
- Anyways, um
- Fuck.
I think I have to go too.
- What?
We literally just got here.
What are you talking about?
Where are you going?
- I have a job.
- What job?
- The Tovah lady's modeling job.
- You took the job?
No.
- I didn't want to.
- No.
- But I have debt.
- My gosh.
What are you doing there?
Like,
what kind of modeling is it?
- I have no clue.
- Hey.
You guys going to The Dome
later?
- Nah.
Well, are you hungry?
I've been craving pierogis
all day.
- That was sick!
- Hey, my man, what's up?
- I'm not really
in a pierogi mood.
Okay.
Well, can I bum one?
- I'm all out.
Sorry.
Are are you, like, mad at me?
- Ready? Ready?
- Here I go.
- Why would I be mad at you?
- I can't feel bad about this.
- Ay, yo, Pink Kirt.
Let's go say "what's up."
- We saying "what up"?
- Shit.
- Okay.
- What's up, Kirt?
- Heard you were in a time-out.
- What the fuck?
- Yo, is that a gerbil?
You gonna put that up your butt?
- What?
No, it's a rat.
You're wildin'.
- Her name is Perstephanie,
and even though we just met,
we go way back.
- Wow.
Yeah, I know exactly
what you mean, Kirt.
- This girl, she's there for me
when nobody else is.
- Yo, I wanna be on your level,
bro.
- Facts, me too.
- It's crazy.
- You do?
- Yes.
- Okay.
- Okay?
- You're Honeybear.
You're Janay, and you're Indigo.
- Hey.
Indigo child.
- Yeah, don't get too excited.
We all indigos in a way,
sometime.
- You saved the day
with this one.
- Okay.
- No, but these taste real foul.
- Yo, how long they even take
to kick in?
30, 45?
Some shit like that.
- I don't know because I don't
understand time right now.
- Where did you get that rat
from, though?
- Time is an illusion.
- Yeah,
where'd you find the rat?
- She found me.
My gosh.
- What's wrong?
- Your happy trail.
It's not happy.
It's ecstatic.
Hair, makeup.
- Right here!
- Do either of you have
a degree in forestry?
You see this?
I love environmentalism,
but not on my set.
That bush has to go.
- You have to anticipate.
- Like,
I can feel when you do it.
I can feel your hands move.
- I don't like this game.
- So did you grow up vegetarian?
- No, I'm doing a challenge
for the year
by being vegetarian.
- That's it?
It's just a year?
- Yeah.
- And then you're just
gonna go back?
- Yeah.
- Do you do challenges?
Like, is that your thing?
- Yeah.
- What's the next one?
- No Instagram.
- My God.
I gotta do that.
I'm too addicted.
Come up here with me.
- I like the floor.
It's good for my spine.
- Made me feel like
I was special ♪
Feel like a princess,
so very cool ♪
The first time
you were talking to me ♪
You made me feel like
I was special ♪
- Hey.
- Hey.
- We don't have time
for that ♪
- So what part of your spine
hurts?
- For boys like him ♪
We don't have time for that,
we don't have time for that ♪
We don't have time
for boys ♪
- Are you wearing
strawberry ChapStick?
- We don't have time
for that ♪
We don't have time
for that ♪
We don't have time
for boys like him ♪
We don't have time
for that ♪
We don't have time
for that ♪
We don't have time
for boys like him ♪
- It's raspberry.
- We're just some
of the other girls ♪
We're just some
of the other boys ♪
We're just some
of the other girls ♪
We're just some
of the other boys ♪
We're just some
of the other girls ♪
We're just some
of the other boys ♪
We're just some
of the other girls ♪
We're just ♪
- You lied to me.
- I told you
about the comments, Janay.
- I'm not talking
about the comments.
That's not what
I'm talking about.
I'm not talking about that.
I'm talking about Yvette.
You lied to me.
- Yeah, right.
Yeah, Yvette.
I should've figured, man.
- I know that
she's telling the truth.
Word?
You know that
she's telling the truth?
- Yes, I do.
- How? How?
- Because the exact same thing
happened to me
when we were together.
- Wow.
Whoa.
You're tripping, Janay.
You're literally on acid, man.
- I know that
she's telling the truth
because back when
we were dating,
I fell asleep and woke up
with your hands down my pants.
- I literally have no idea
what you're talking about.
You know, I didn't process this
for a long time,
and I think it was
because I was so mad at her
for bringing up my shit too.
- You literally just said it,
though, Janay.
We were dating.
We were together, were we not?
Do you not let dudes
you're dating cop a feel?
Yes, you do.
Okay, so I'm not perfect, Janay,
but I'm not some evil
rapist dude.
I'm not.
And honestly, you never
said anything at the time,
neither did she, okay?
And if either of you had said
anything,
then I would have cut it out.
- But how do you say something
when you're asleep?
How?
- I just think it's crazy
that after all these years,
after fucking doing
this terrible thing to you,
that Yvette Torrio,
out of all people,
gets inside your ear,
and now, all of a sudden,
I'm some monster.
- That's not what I'm saying.
- Then what are you saying?
- That's not what I'm saying.
- That is what you're saying!
What are you saying, then?
I know you, Janay.
You're a strong-ass woman, okay?
You would never let
anybody me or anybody
Do some shit to you that
you wouldn't want them to do.
Am I right?
Yeah.
- Okay.
So you have to see
what she's doing right now.
She's trying to get
inside your head,
and obviously,
it's fucking working.
I don't know why she's doing it.
Maybe she's fucking jealous
or something.
I don't know.
But she's crazy.
She's fucking nuts!
And now she's got you thinking
you're crazy.
Are you crazy?
Are you crazy?
No, I'm not.
No, I'm not.
- 'Cause you acting crazy.
- I was just
I was just so young.
- I was young too!
I was young too, man
but I would never
I would never do anything
to hurt you, Janay, ever.
You are my best friend.
- Yeah, you're mine too.
- No, she shouldn't be out here
past her prime.
That's some saggy shit.
- Let her live, bro.
She's feeling herself.
You're, like, sending her
bad vibes with your words.
And also, I know you love
your sisters and your aunties
and your grand-mamas.
They all females.
- Yeah.
- Right?
That's true.
- And Perstephanie's
a female too.
You love her, don't you?
- I fucking love her.
- Yes, sir.
- Okay, then.
Yo,
if you wanna love the vagina,
you best love the heart too.
You don't gotta be regulating
on that lady over there.
Yo, we love you!
- Yeah, we love you!
- We love you!
- Yo, I love you!
Yo, I think I really love her.
I think I really do.
- She love you too, bro.
Love you too.
- Hey, can we get more ghetto?
- You see that this shit
is fucked up, right?
- They have a concept, I guess.
- But this is
cultural appropriation.
They're putting mad
black and Latin looks
on white girls.
- For two grand a day,
they can cornrow my bush.
- Bring me the black girl
the one with the tummy fur.
- Hey!
Hey.
Can I talk to you for a second?
- I'm about to leave.
What's up?
- Dude, why are you mad at me?
- I'm not mad at you.
Jesus.
I just told you that.
- But then why are you
being weird and, like
- How am I being weird?
- I don't know.
You're just acting different,
and I just wanna make sure
that we're good
and that we're, like
- I said "We're good,"
so we're good.
Why do you keep trying
to make this a thing?
See, I know this would happen.
Chicks always start bugging
over nothing.
- What?
I'm not I'm just asking you
if I did anything wrong.
- I'm
- You're gonna cry?
No.
- Dude, I seriously can't handle
the tears right now.
- Why are you being so mean?
Stop being so mean.
I'm not
- Why am I being mean?
- Yeah!
I didn't do anything to you.
I'm just trying to figure out
what I did wrong.
I didn't do anything.
What?
- This is just some, like,
third grade shit.
I
I'm over this right now.
I'm out.
- So thanks for walking me here.
You didn't have to do that.
- I know.
I wanted to.
Shit.
- What?
Who are we hiding from?
- My dad.
- Why don't we just say "Hey"?
It's just your dad.
- No, no, no, no, no, no.
Let's just go.
Let's just go.
- What?
- Let's just go.
- Are you serious?
- Yeah.
- So I guess you're not out yet?
- There's no "in" and "out."
I don't do labels.
- Okay,
I'm just trying to understand.
Is your dad conservative
or something?
- No, it's just it's how I am.
- What does that mean?
I mean,
you literally just grabbed me
and pulled me behind some pole.
- Look, I don't need
to explain myself.
Just because we hooked up
doesn't mean I need
to "process."
- Okay, that's mean.
Look, I know that this is not
a comfortable conversation.
We can just stop.
- Yeah, yeah,
we can stop right now.
Like, I'm done.
I don't wanna do this anymore.
I gotta go.
- Honeybear.
Are you serious?
Just like that?
Yo!
- Digging deeper
for a way out ♪
- Nightfall comes
but we're not done ♪
Falling further ♪
- Let me guess.
Bambi shit, right?
What happened?
- Nothing.
Literally, nothing.
He won't tell me
what I did wrong.
I don't know why he's mad or
- Dude, it's Bambi
we're talking about.
He's a fucking dick.
- Isn't he your good friend?
He's my boy,
but that doesn't mean
he's not a fucking dick.
Look, I don't know
if this is gonna
make you feel any better
or worse.
I'ma be honest.
He's been doing this shit
forever.
And I understand how you feel,
Camille.
Honestly.
When he shines
that light on you,
it feels so fucking good.
When he takes it from you,
that shit is ice-fucking-cold.
You'll be all right.
- Sleeping through
another season ♪
Troubled by
what falls away ♪
Symbols pass
for no good reason ♪
Hidden world
that I can tame ♪
We are strangers
to ourselves ♪
We are strangers
to ourselves ♪
- All right, bitches,
give it to me ghetto.
Now.
Roberto, shoot.
All right, lean into it.
Hood, hood.
Nasty.
Right now, you're middle class.
Give me low class.
Yes, no privileges.
Head Wrap, give more.
Give more.
I want you to bleed through.
Now give me ghetto, ladies!
I want to see ghetto, ladies.
Ghet-to, okurr?
Give me food stamps,
WIC vouchers,
baby daddy, church lady,
bouffant wig,
Cardi B, tongue pop,
Nene Leakes.
Plonk, plonk.
Yes!
- Give me trap house.
Yes, good.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Out of the plantation.
Escape to freedom.
Escape to freedom,
but commercialized.
- Fuck this.
- Do it just like that.
That is what I want to see.
This is perfect.
This is perfect.
- Yeah!
- Okay, go get
your purple drank, baby.
Do it
- Yeah!
- Kenny Beats.
- Sugar Trap.
- Ill.
- Rule number one.
- Don't worry 'bout a bitch
who never been in your place ♪
Always move in silence,
never question your fate ♪
- Rule number two!
- Always check in ♪
On your niggas, gotta
make sure they straight ♪
If I'm getting money, then
you know we all got a plate ♪
Since a baby in her tummy,
Mama knew I was great ♪
They can't play me
like a dummy ♪
They know what not to take ♪
When the times was rough,
I would look up and pray ♪
Thank God I ain't have to
smack a bitch today ♪
My fucking God.
- Smack a bitch today ♪
Thank God I ain't have to
smack a bitch today ♪
Yeah!
- Monday is blue,
Tuesday is green,
and Wednesday is orange.
- We don't play that.
- Janay always tries to say
that it's purple,
but she's wrong.
- You're both wrong.
Isn't it char-queese?
- Chartreuse.
- "Charq-queese."
- Chartreuse.
- Which which one
is chartreuse again?
- Don't you guys hate it
when you first start crushing
on somebody
and then all you wanna do
is just fucking eat their face?
Like aggressively
eat their face?
- Yo, I used to talk
to this fine-ass boy
from fucking London,
and he had that accent.
And I don't know,
we were just laying in bed
one day,
and I was looking at him,
and I'm like,
"Damn, son, I just wanna
fucking kill you right now."
'Cause I'm like,
"how can somebody keep fucking
controlling me like this?"
And then I was like, "Damn,
I couldn't kill him by myself.
He's too big."
- Whaa!
- Twah.
- You know what else is rad?
The number five.
- Yo, you fuckin' right.
- So what color is blue?
- Low key.
- Yo, Kirt, what color is blue?
Right?
I'm like,
"What number is blue?"
- Yeah, color blue is blue.
- 22.
- 22!
She bust my head with that one.
- That's my life path,
number 22.
- What the hell that mean?
- Yo.
- Call it a vagina.
- "Vagina" sounds worse!
- It's a medical term.
It's proper.
- I'd rather say "pussy."
Or "my little thing."
- No.
- Little miss thing?
- Worse. Worse.
- Who determines
what is harassment
and what is not harassment?
Is it the courts?
Is it you? Is it me?
- It's if I you feel harassed.
- Yeah.
- 'Cause if you don't feel
harassed, then it's not a issue.
But if you start feeling
harassment,
and you get uncomfortable
and you get to that point
where, like, I don't want to be
in this situation,
that's harassment,
and you have to
- And address it.
- I don't mind all catcalling.
- Yeah, I agree.
- Like, I don't know.
- I'm just not about to
"me too" some rando
for, like, telling me
my butt looks great.
- Hey!
I'm out chere.
Feelin' like a tree.
You blend in.
- My first kiss was a tree.
- You kissed a tree before?
- Yeah.
- Damn.
- You never kissed a tree?
Please touch my belly.
- Biscuits.
- Making biscuits!
- We gonna make biscuits, guys?
They wanna make biscuits.
- Meow. Meow!
Meow.
- Yo, what you meowing for?
She's a rat, not a cat.
- So
- You're probably scaring
her away.
- What the fuck am I supposed
to do, then?
- She is scared!
She's hiding!
- So what am I supposed to do?
- My God!
Perstephanie!
- Yo, I
I think I found
one of her feathers.
- Yo!
Yo, I'm too, high for all this.
Yo, Kirt, maybe
you didn't lose her.
- What do you mean?
- Maybe she ran away.
Like you did.
- Wow.
My God.
I think I do get what you mean.
I lost my baby.
Pshh.
- But Perstephanie's
just a rat, yo.
- And so am I.
- Facts.
- You get it?
You get it?
- I get it, yeah.
- I get it, yeah.
- You're a rat.
- Right there, right there.
- Put it up, man.
Up. All right.
- Here we go.
- Yeah.
- Game, baby.
Here we go.
- We got your texts.
- Yeah, so, um,
I wanted to tell you guys
that I'm the rat.
- What?
- Just listen.
I met someone,
thought we were friends,
hung out all day,
shared a few laughs,
and when I looked up,
she was gone.
She ran off,
just like I did to you guys.
And, um, she was a rat
that I bought.
- Okay.
- Dude, are you high?
- Not that much anymore.
But what I'm trying to say
is that I fucked up
and I'm sorry.
I shouldn't have ran off
and started shit at The Dome.
And it's my fault
you guys got arrested.
I know I need to be better,
and I know I need to relax.
And I'm really sorry,
and I hope you can forgive me.
- Come here.
- And you know you have to
apologize to Camille, right?
Shit.
You're right, I need to find
that bitch.
My God.
- We wander through
each other's lives ♪
Just like the rivers,
constant flow ♪
And signs of life
in all our eyes ♪
Keep this city on the go ♪
The sun will rise,
the sun will set ♪
Seven days, five and two ♪
From this life
into the next ♪
We're all just trying
to make it through ♪
We're all just trying
to make it through ♪
In every class,
in every school ♪
At every desk
where time's well spent ♪
Waking up
to break the rules ♪
Waiting for
the week to end ♪
The same old tale
repeats itself ♪
Nine to five,
year on year ♪
Thoughts and hopes
left on the shelf ♪
Escape on Friday ♪
Get caught on Monday ♪
Escape on Friday ♪
Get caught on Monday ♪
The sun will rise,
the sun will set ♪
Seven days,
five and two ♪
From this life
into the next ♪
We're all just trying
to make it through ♪
We're all just trying
to make it through ♪
How the crowds
emerge at night ♪
Transported through the ♪
Improved by KID
Enjoy the movie(s) / show(s)
I wanna stop fighting
the patriarchy,
and just start helping
the matriarchy.
Since when did you get all
peaceful?
Since Yesterday.
What's going on
with you and Ash?
Can you just drop it?
- Gimme the keys.
- My keys?
To the apartment.
I'm broken, Janay.
I need your help!
CAMILLE:
I feel like you should host
another one of those
girl sesh's.
I tried that one time,
nobody came.
You're really gonna let that
stop you from trying again?
Yo, stop stop!
We're having a girl sesh.
What, basic bitches might skate
too, you don't know!