Canada's Drag Race (2020) s01e05 Episode Script
Snatch Game
RUPAUL: Previously,
on Canada's Drag Race
STACEY: You will be
working in teams
to create an iconic fashion line
made entirely from
recyclable materials.
JIMBO: What do you guys think
if I make a crown with these?
TYNOMI: I'm not going out on the
runway without a cohesive look.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh, wow.
JEFFREY: Rita Baga,
con-drag-ulations.
You are the winner of
this week's challenge.
RITA: Woo!
JEFFREY: Team Paper.
STACEY: I would love to have
seen a little bit more couture.
ILONA: Jimbo had this really
cool idea to be our queen.
JEFFREY: Well, I like
the idea for Jimbo as well.
BROOKE LYNN: It looks like I
should hang you in my backyard
and beat you with a stick.
JEFFREY: Ilona Verley,
chanté, you stay.
ILONA: [gasps]
JEFFREY: Tynomi Banks
Sashay away.
♪
♪
♪
ILONA: [tearfully]
Sisters for life.
ILONA: Another Toronto girl
has left the building.
ILONA: "Love life, be you,
Tynomi Banks."
ILONA: I'm so grateful
that I'm still here,
but it's so hard
when it's bittersweet.
It just sucks.
ILONA: I love you, Tynomi.
♪
RITA: I think Tynomi is
one of the greatest queens
that we have here in Canada.
She has been an inspiration,
and I will miss her deeply.
But I came here to win,
so I better work.
SCARLETT: This game
feels so real now.
It feels like this room
is getting empty.
PRIYANKA: It's like
every woman for themselves.
LEMON: Every week
it feels like a family--
like a real family member
is dipping.
It's so sad.
KIARA: Yeah.
PRIYANKA: Except
for when Kyne left.
I didn't care.
[laughter]
BOA: Oh, you bitch!
You're the devil, bitch!
You're the devil.
I have this theory that Priyanka
is possessed by the devil
because she's so perfect
and she's here to take over
the world as a drag queen.
PRIYANKA: [laughs]
RITA: So she's not perfect.
Have you seen her ears?
[cheetah sound effect]
[laughter]
PRIYANKA: [giggles]
PRIYANKA: This week
I'm on my game.
I have to be.
Being voted "Best Local
Drag Queen of Toronto,"
there's so much
like riding on me.
And now that Tynomi is gone,
I think that
I'm a top contender.
PRIYANKA: I'm very
excited to win $100,000.
It's gonna be really cool.
LEMON: I'm very excited to
watch you not win $100,000.
PRIYANKA: [laughs]
JIMBO: Someone has
to go home next.
I'm kind of wondering who
the next bitch is gonna be.
ILONA: Ah-ha-ow!
This thing just paper cut me!
♪
RUPAUL: The winner of
Canada's Drag Race receives
a year of hotel
stays from Hilton,
and a cash prize of $100,000.
With Jeffrey Bowyer-Chapman,
Stacey McKenzie,
and Brooke Lynn Hytes.
With tonight's extra special
guest host, Mary Walsh.
♪
♪
PRIYANKA: Oop!
LEMON: [laughs]
LEMON: Top 8, doll.
JIMBO: Top 8.
ILONA: It's a new day
in the workroom,
and I'm thankfully still here,
but we're all kind of getting
at each other's throats
a little bit at this point.
LEMON: Tensions were
pretty high last week.
ILONA: Having to
lip sync for my life,
like, when the song started,
I almost was just gonna
walk off the stage.
I stood there when it was over
looking around, being like,
"I'm fine if I leave tonight."
PRIYANKA: But that's
so disrespectful.
SCARLETT: Stupid!
PRIYANKA: That's
so disrespectful
to the competition,
to the judges, to us.
PRIYANKA: We're
gonna play many cards
during this competition.
Just don't play
the victim card, okay?
ILONA: How was I playing
the victim card, girl?
PRIYANKA: Because you're
like, "Feel bad for me.
"I want to go home.
It's too stressful.
"I don't want to
send my friend home."
ILONA: I was feeling
my own emotions,
which are mine to have,
and how dare you tell me
how to feel, Priyanka?
PRIYANKA: Okay, sorry.
I apologize.
ILONA: Yeah, thank you.
JIMBO: Well, thank you!
LEMON: I guess tensions
are still high.
[tense laughter]
[siren]
PRIYANKA: [screams]
RUPAUL: O Canada!
She done already
done had herses.
Hello, my queens.
KIARA: Hi, little girl.
RUPAUL: Wait.
What was I about to say?
Oh, it's all coming
back to me now.
Near, far, wherever you are,
it's time to make
a titanic impression,
and if we move in unison,
then love can move mountains.
SCARLETT: Ahh!
KIARA: Ah, Celina.
RUPAUL: And that's
the way it is.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Mama's homo!
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Is it bad luck
to wear sunglasses indoors?
I wish I cared.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: But sunglasses
are the best protection
against harmful, shady gays.
[oohing from the queens]
ILONA: Oh no!
BROOKE LYNN: Can we get
some protection up in here?
Oh, pit crew!
[oohs & aahs from queens]
BROOKE LYNN: You guessed it,
my lambs.
In the grand tradition of
Paris, Ontario, is Burning
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Today's mini
challenge is all about reading.
BOA: Oh my god!
BROOKE LYNN: Because
reading is what?
QUEENS: Fundamental!
BROOKE LYNN: One at a time,
you will come stand with me,
select a beautiful, stylish pair
of Bailey Nelson sunglasses,
and dewy decimate
these bitches to filth.
SCARLETT: Yes!
BROOKE LYNN: The library
of Canada is officially open.
BOA: Oh my god!
BROOKE LYNN: Okay,
Priyanka, come on down.
Select a pair of sunglasses.
PRIYANKA: Oh.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Alright,
at your will.
PRIYANKA: Scarlett BoBo,
your face is like your spot
in this competition--
filler.
SCARLETT: Ahh!
[laughter]
PRIYANKA: Kiara, you are
just finally understanding
how to speak English, but now,
when will you finally
understand how to do drag?
Was that bad?
LEMON: [laughs]
BROOKE LYNN: It wasn't
your best work.
[laughter]
PRIYANKA: Let's move on.
PRIYANKA: Jimbo, I was so
excited to finally see you
out of drag for the first time,
but really, it's all the same.
Mediocre.
[gasps & laughter]
JIMBO: Okurr.
ILONA: Hi, poors.
First up, Boa,
Bitch On Arrival.
When are you gonna
show up, girl?
[oohing & laughter]
BOA: That was good,
that was good, that was good.
ILONA: BoBo, you should really
change your last name to Hobo
because your drag is
more than pedestrian.
BROOKE LYNN: Wouldn't that
be less than pedestrian?
JIMBO: Yeah.
SCARLETT: Yes!
ILONA: No, it's like--
like more than just pedestrian.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh.
Oh.
ILONA: Oh my god, I live.
Okay, Rita Baga, you're only
in your 30s but you paint like
you're trying to get
the seniors' discount
at the supermarket.
BROOKE LYNN: That's
'cause she's a smart bitch.
RITA: Mm-hm!
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Let her rip, girl.
BOA: Priyanka, it's so crazy
how you can paint so fast.
We paint one face,
and you paint two faces.
PRIYANKA: Oh, 'cause I'm shady?
BOA: Yeah.
PRIYANKA: Ah, you got it!
BOA: Lemon, can
you hold my drink?
I always love putting
it on a coaster.
[laughter]
♪
LEMON: That was a good one.
That was a good one.
SCARLETT: Ilona Verley,
in drag you give us
Morticia Addams.
Out of drag, Uncle Fester.
[laughter]
SCARLETT: Kiara, I never
understood the term
"loose lips" until I met you.
You get used more than a
revolving door during rush hour.
[laughter]
KIARA: Oh my god.
SCARLETT: Rita Baga,
the only thing worse than
your drag closet
is your piss poor attitude.
RITA: I'm sorry?
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: It's
not a bad attitude.
She's French Canadian.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Thank you, BoBo.
PRIYANKA: Ah, I'm so scared!
KIARA: Boa, I'd love
to take you to the gym,
not to work out with you, but
to use you as my exercise ball.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Lemon,
I know you have a lot to say.
SCARLETT: Oh, those are cute.
PRIYANKA: Really cute on you.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh, don't try
to be nice now, bitches.
LEMON: Priyanka,
you talk about having sex a lot,
but the only thing
you're is stupid.
[laughter]
BOA: You in danger, bitch!
[laughter]
LEMON: Kiara, are you a bird?
Because all your runways are
cheap, cheap, cheap, cheap!
[oohing & screaming]
LEMON: Rita Baga,
last week I saw you
playing with the plastics,
and I saw that there
was a slinky there,
and you really remind
me of a slinky because
I don't know what you're
good at, but I'd love to
push you down the stairs.
ILONA: Oh!
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Good job, Lemon.
LEMON: Coasting where?
BROOKE LYNN: Jimbo.
JIMBO: Ilona, someone
get this bitch a medal.
She's a broken record--
sickening, work, I'm living.
[laughter]
ILONA: Oh!
JIMBO: Kiara, was
your mom a bird?
Because you're
pigeon-toed, bitch!
SCARLETT: Ah!
KIARA: Pigeon-toed?
BROOKE LYNN: Surprise.
JIMBO: Lemon,
you're so full of yourself,
you could be
a lemon meringue pie--
light and fluffy on top
with a crusty little bottom.
[laughter]
[laughter]
JIMBO: Rita Baga,
you think you're all that
and a bag-achips, but I'm
getting more bag-agarbage.
ILONA: Oh!
JIMBO: But I'm not.
I actually think
you're incredible.
ILONA: Don't say it.
JIMBO: I'm sorry.
That's the worst.
Bad Jimbo.
Bad Jimbo.
Bad!
RITA: Priyanka, so apparently
you are DTF,
but to me you're more QTL--
questionable taste level.
PRIYANKA: Ah!
[laughter]
RITA: Okay,
hold on five seconds.
♪
Okay, can we
just embrace the fact
that Ilona wasn't complaining
for five seconds, please?
ILONA: Oh!
[laughter]
RITA: And I'm grateful
that we have this
opportunity to do
Drag Race, so finally,
a Canadian can win Drag Race.
ILONA: Oh!
RITA: Thank you!
ILONA: She just let
Brooke Lynn have it!
RITA: Thank you!
BROOKE LYNN: See you
on the runway, girl.
JIMBO: Oh, you in danger, bitch!
BROOKE LYNN: La bibliotheque
is now closed,
which means you're loitering.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Run along,
darling, run along.
It's always so sad
to watch him go.
LEMON: Not that sad.
BROOKE LYNN: Alright,
you shady, shady beavers,
the winner of this week's
mini challenge
is
Lemon.
[applause]
LEMON: Yeah!
you.
BROOKE LYNN: You have won
a $1,000 gift certificate
from LAG Concepts
for divine drag jewels.
LEMON: Work!
I'm gagging.
BROOKE LYNN: You know,
they say imitation
is the sincerest
form of flattery.
That's right.
For this week's maxi challenge,
we are playing
the one, the only
Snatch Game.
[cheering & applause]
ILONA: This is the first
Snatch Game ever in Canada.
How iconic.
BROOKE LYNN: Each of you
must impersonate a celebrity
and do your very best
to make us
blank our blanking blanks off.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: #CanadasDragRace.
Gentlemen, start your engines,
and may the best woman win.
[laughter & applause]
LEMON: Snatch Game
is very important
in this competition because
it separates the dumb bitches
from the really clever girls.
LEMON: Did you
grow up doing improv?
PRIYANKA: I did.
It's been a while
since I have done improv,
but I feel like drag
is improv, so
LEMON: It is.
PRIYANKA: I'm excited.
PRIYANKA: Improv
challenges are my jam.
I worked in kids TV
for eight years.
Working in kids TV taught me how
to play different characters,
and just how to like own
everything I'm doing.
JIMBO: Why are you
glittering that head up?
PRIYANKA: I'm making
it into a crystal ball.
JIMBO: What are you being?
PRIYANKA: I'm gonna
be Miss Cleo.
JIMBO: Oh, Cleo never lie!
PRIYANKA: Miss Cleo never lies.
Call me now.
PRIYANKA: Miss Cleo,
the famous TV psychic.
She's West Indian.
I can play into that.
PRIYANKA: $199 for
our psychic reading.
PRIYANKA: Snatch Game
you need to be really,
really big or you
literally can go home.
PRIYANKA: This!
PRIYANKA: I think
I'm gonna be okay.
PRIYANKA: I look like
Will Smith in Aladin.
PRIYANKA: Call me now.
JEFFREY: Bonjour, babies!
LEMON: Hi-eee.
JEFFREY: I'm here to see
who can tickle my funny bone
with their she-larious snatch.
[laughter]
LEMON: Yes!
JEFFREY: Hi, Kiara.
KIARA: Hi, Jeffrey.
JEFFREY: How are we?
KIARA: I'm good, I'm excited.
JEFFREY: Snatch Game
is my favourite game
of the year, honey!
KIARA: Yeah, me too.
JEFFREY: It's
Snatch Game season.
KIARA: Yes.
JEFFREY: Speaking of which
What season is this?
KIARA: It's Christmas.
JEFFREY: [gasps]
Mariah!
KIARA: Of course, yeah.
Gonna get some champagne.
Gonna get some good boobies.
JEFFREY: I like
where this is going!
KIARA: I do her in my show
sometimes and, you know,
people really enjoy it.
JEFFREY: It's about
staying in character,
thinking like the character
KIARA: Yes.
JEFFREY: and making us laugh.
KIARA: Yeah, for sure.
JEFFREY: Don't let
Mariah down, honey.
KIARA: I won't, baby.
JEFFREY: Thanks, Kiara.
Can't wait to see it.
KIARA: Thank you.
JEFFREY: I can't even begin
to imagine who this is.
ILONA: Right, there's
a lot happening here.
JEFFREY: Give me a hint.
ILONA: I'm getting ready to
source out .
JEFFREY: [gasps]
ILONA: Giving you
a little Rebecca More.
JEFFREY: So exciting!
ILONA: Yeah!
ILONA: Rebecca More
is an iconic porn star,
otherwise known as
the Destroyer.
Hello.
JEFFREY: Okay, so what are you
gonna do to bring Rebecca
to life and make me laugh?
ILONA: So I think being Rebecca
is just that over the top
personality, which is,
I think, something I need
to channel across anyways.
JEFFREY: Yes, girl.
ILONA: So I think this is gonna
be the perfect character
for me to do
to get that across.
JEFFREY: Do not fade
into the background.
This is your time to shine.
Destroy, bitch.
ILONA: I'm gonna destroy.
I'm gonna destroy.
JEFFREY: See you soon.
Bye-ee.
ILONA: Bye.
JEFFREY: Jimbo,
I can't think for a second
who you could possibly be doing.
JIMBO: [Joan Rivers]
Oh, oh, can we tawk, Jeffrey?
JEFFREY: Oh, you are giving me
Joan Rivers right now.
JIMBO: You got it, girl!
JIMBO: Joan Rivers is an icon
in the gay community,
in the comedians' community,
so I have some
really big shoes to fill.
I need to make sure
that my portrayal of her
lives up to her legendary name.
JEFFREY: I cannot wait to see
what you bring us
with Miss Joan Rivers.
But you also haven't
gotten a win yet.
JIMBO: Okay.
JEFFREY: We know that you can
deliver when it comes to looks.
We know that you can deliver
when it comes to personality.
This is your time
to shine, okay?
This is Snatch Game, girl.
You have made it, now bring it.
JIMBO: Thank you.
JEFFREY: Thanks, Jimbo.
JIMBO: Thank you, Jeffrey.
JEFFREY: Bye.
JIMBO: Bye.
JIMBO: I'm gonna bring
everything I have
to the Snatch Game.
I really want to be seen
as a fierce competitor,
and ready to win.
PRIYANKA: Hi, Jeffrey.
JEFFREY: Hi.
Girl, who are we doing?
PRIYANKA: I'm gonna
be Miss Cleo.
JEFFREY: Exciting.
PRIYANKA: I'm very excited.
JEFFREY: Okay, so you've
got the look down.
How are you gonna make
us laugh as Miss Cleo?
PRIYANKA: I did a lot of improv.
I just have to really like
listen to what's going on.
JEFFREY: You really stood out
in the acting challenge,
so we know that you
can bring the comedy.
We know that you can deliver.
PRIYANKA: Yes.
JEFFREY: So I'm looking forward
to seeing what you're
gonna bring with Miss Cleo.
PRIYANKA: My talk with
Jeffrey is going pretty well.
Jeffrey has full
confidence in me.
JEFFREY: Did you come to win,
or did you come to play?
PRIYANKA: I came to win.
Ha!
JEFFREY: I can't
wait to see you win.
Thanks, Priyanka.
PRIYANKA: Thank you, Jeffrey.
JEFFREY: Goodbye-ee.
PRIYANKA: Bye-ee.
PRIYANKA: I have potential to be
funny, and I'm good at acting,
so don't worry.
Miss Cleo will come to life.
I promise.
PRIYANKA: [laughs]
JEFFREY: What's all this?
SCARLETT: Hello.
How are you?
JEFFREY: You have
a lot going on here.
SCARLETT: I've got
it down to two.
JEFFREY: Oh, we
have options here.
SCARLETT: Yeah,
so I have my Liza.
JEFFREY: I love a good Liza.
SCARLETT: And
I have Fran Drescher,
which is my new one.
JEFFREY: Okay, so give me
some of what you've got.
Give me a little bit
of Fran Drescher.
SCARLETT: [Fran Drescher]
Oh, Mr. Jeffrey, ha-ha!
How you doing today?
A-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
SCARLETT: I'm like,
"Oh my god."
He's looking at me like
JEFFREY: Switch it up.
Give me a little bit
of Liza, darling.
SCARLETT: [Liza Minelli]
Well, it's ' Liza.
I mean, look at this.
I've got two hairs.
I've got two wigs.
I've got some shoes
and an outfit.
It's Liza!
JEFFREY: [laughs]
SCARLETT: It's Liza Minelli,
you know?
How can you go wrong with Liza?
JEFFREY: Amazing.
Okay, so you've
done Liza before.
SCARLETT: Yeah.
JEFFREY: Ask yourself, is this
the time to take a risk,
or is this the time
to play it safe?
Because you have been safe
in this competition
again and again and again.
SCARLETT: Yeah.
JEFFREY: I'll just
leave you with that.
SCARLETT: Thanks, honey.
JEFFREY: Bye!
SCARLETT: I'm happy that
I made it to Snatch Game,
but I just don't know
who I'm gonna pick.
SCARLETT: [Drescher]
Mrs. Sheffield.
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
♪
JEFFREY: Rita Baga, so what
have we got going on here?
RITA: She's the most
well-known French singer.
JEFFREY: Edith Piaf.
RITA: Yes.
JEFFREY: Um, she's got
so much to work with.
RITA: I choose Edith Piaf.
I don't think it has
ever been done before,
a French character on the
Snatch Game and, you know,
she likes to be memorable.
RITA: People know her mostly
because she was a drug addict.
JEFFREY: Yes.
RITA: She was really miserable,
so it's easy to play with that.
But when she first started her
career, she was really sassy.
I'm gonna play with that.
JEFFREY: No one's done
her on Snatch Game.
RITA: I'm excited but
I'm nervous at the same time.
JEFFREY: Let's see what
you've got, Miss Rita Baga.
I can't wait.
Make us laugh.
RITA: I will.
JEFFREY: Bye.
RITA: It's a promise.
JEFFREY: What have
we got going on here?
BOA: So, we have
some Cyndi Lauper.
JEFFREY: Uh-huh.
BOA: Rebel Wilson.
JEFFREY: Who else?
BOA: Gypsy Rose Blanchard.
JEFFREY: The girl
who had fake cancer?
BOA: Yes.
JEFFREY: Okay, okay.
BOA: I really want to do it but
I don't want to be offensive,
so I feel like I'm playing
on a fine line here.
JEFFREY: Okay.
I want to hear a little bit
of what you've got
for Cyndi Lauper's voice.
BOA: [Cyndi Lauper] Very
like New Yawk and cute,
and she's got a little something
in her throat, you know?
JEFFREY: I don't know
if I do know.
BOA: Jeffrey's looking at me
like, "You better don't, girl!"
BOA: [Lauper]
A little higher, maybe?
Something like that?
Is that a little bit better?
JEFFREY: Okay
I want to hear what you've got
for Rebel Wilson.
BOA: So excited to
be here, Jeffrey,
and she can do like a dab.
She does a dab.
Maybe she could have like
a tattoo or something.
And she's just stupid,
like I could just like
JEFFREY: Don't think
too much about it,
but listen to what
you're saying, okay?
You've got a lot of
work ahead of you.
I can't wait to see
what you pull together.
You've got this.
Peace.
BOA: Take care.
I love you.
JEFFREY: Bye-ee!
BOA: [sputters]
JEFFREY: Hi, Lemon.
LEMON: How are you?
JEFFREY: So what have
we got going on here?
LEMON: I've decided
to do JoJo Siwa
who is from Dance Moms.
JEFFREY: Okay.
LEMON: And now she is
a kind of child star.
She's a very loud personality.
LEMON: JoJo has so many
funny qualities about her.
She talks superfast.
She asks questions and then
answers them immediately.
She can't pronounce her Rs,
so I think there's a lot
of material that
I can work with.
JEFFREY: Let's talk
about the critiques.
How are you feeling
about everything?
LEMON: I'm feeling puzzlement.
I'm a little bit confused
because I'm working my butt off,
and it's feeling like
I'm not doing enough.
JEFFREY: Hm.
LEMON: And drag
is my everything.
Like, I thought for a long time
that dance was the only thing
that made me happy,
and then I found this,
and it just changed my world.
JEFFREY: You're really
feeling this right now, huh?
LEMON: Yeah, I want to
prove to you guys that
this matters so much to me,
and I want to be
Canada's next drag superstar,
and I want to show you guys
that I have everything
it takes to do that.
JEFFREY: I cannot wait to see
what you bring to Snatch Game.
Make us laugh.
LEMON: I can't either.
JEFFREY: Bye.
LEMON: After being
called a coaster,
I know that I have
to take a huge risk,
and Snatch Game
is the perfect place to do that
because if I'm gonna lose,
I'm gonna lose big.
♪
JEFFREY: Ladies, I'm going to
leave you to get into your faces
and out of your heads.
And tomorrow,
on the main stage,
category is "Night of
a Thousand Celines."
[applause & laughter]
JEFFREY: And on the runway,
we'll be joined by our
extra special guest host,
iconic funny woman,
Mary Walsh.
[applause & laughter]
ILONA: Oh my god!
JIMBO: I have watched her
since I was a little boy.
Mary Walsh is hilarious.
JEFFREY: Bye, girls.
QUEENS: Bye-ee.
JEFFREY: Make us laugh.
LEMON: [laughs] Oh, .
SCARLETT: Snatch Game,
you've gotta serve or go home.
SCARLETT: [Minnelli]
It's Liza!
It's Liza!
Oh my god.
♪
ILONA: Oh!
TRACI: Hi, I'm Traci Melchor.
We are live on the red carpet
with SheTalk at the Snatch Game.
♪
TRACI: All the stars are
out for this premiere.
BOA: [Gypsy Rose]
I'm so excited to be here.
TRACI: Are you gonna play
by the rules tonight?
SCARLETT: [Minelli]
I make the rules, honey.
I'm Liza!
I'm ' Liza!
TRACI: It's the gayest
night of the year!
RITA: [Edith Piaf]
Let's have a ménage a trois?
TRACI: Since last week
ILONA: [Rebecca More] Lately
I've been just trying to be
a pretty good girl.
PRIYANKA: [Miss Cleo]
The odds are in my favour
for the low price of 3.99.
You got some money in there?
TRACI: So let's tuck in,
and get ready for some
snatch-worthy appearances.
BOA: There we go.
We're good, we're good.
Oh, no!
JIMBO: [Rivers] I haven't
been flashed this much
since Central Park.
♪
BROOKE LYNN: Welcome to Canada's
newest game show sensation,
the Snatch Game.
BROOKE LYNN: I am your host,
Brooke Lynn Hytes,
living proof that if
you bomb this show,
they make you
come back and host it.
Joining us today is Scottish-
born interior design duo,
Colin and Justin.
JUSTIN: Hey, Brookers!
BROOKE LYNN: Oh, hi.
How are ya?
JUSTIN: We're always
good when you're nearby.
BROOKE LYNN: Now, you boys
have been in Canada
for over a decade now.
What do you love so much
about living here?
COLIN: It's a lifestyle.
It's about getting
close to nature.
It's about wearing plaid.
BROOKE LYNN: What
about our wildlife?
JUSTIN: We've seen a few
bears in our travels.
COLIN: And there's
a lot of beaver
in this room this evening.
JUSTIN: [laughs]
Yes, there is.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Let's meet
our celebrities.
First up, ripped from
the headlines, and her IV,
it's Gypsy Rose Blanchard!
BOA: Hi, how are you?
BROOKE LYNN: Hi, Gypsy.
How you feeling?
BOA: I'm excited, so excited
I could just kill my mother!
♪
BROOKE LYNN: And look who it is!
None other than Joan Rivers!
JIMBO: Oh, Brooke Lynn,
I'm wondering what the hell
I did for my life
to end up in the bottom
of the waste basket
with these hairballs!
Oh, and I also brought Edgar.
I don't go anywhere
without Edgar's ashes.
Oh!
COLIN: [laughs]
BROOKE LYNN: Oh my goodness.
And look, from Dance Moms,
online sensation,
it is JoJo Siwa!
LEMON: Hey, how's it goin'?
I'm so excited to be here.
This is the best day
of my whole life!
Just legit the best day ever!
I am so excited to be here
at the Snatch Game.
I'm so excited to live my truth.
BROOKE LYNN: And what
truth would that be?
LEMON: That I can't
pronounce my Rs.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Thank you.
LEMON: Thank you, Brooke Lynn!
BROOKE LYNN: And it is
everybody's favourite
TV psychic, Miss Cleo.
PRIYANKA: Call me now!
BROOKE LYNN: Miss Cleo, can
you tell me what I'm thinking
right now?
PRIYANKA: Hm, you're
thinking about
some snatch for taste later.
BROOKE LYNN: What
does that mean?
PRIYANKA: It means
you suck a pom-pom.
BROOKE LYNN: What's a pom-pom?
PRIYANKA: Look under
the dance belt.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh, got it.
Ha-ha-ha-ha.
And oh my stars,
legendary French chanteuse,
Edith Piaf!
RITA: Thank you.
Thank you so much.
BROOKE LYNN: You look
a little hunched over.
RITA: Oh, just a little bit.
I've been sleeping, you know?
BROOKE LYNN: For
how many years now?
RITA: Oh, too much, my baby.
BROOKE LYNN: Now, you know
you can't smoke in here, right?
RITA: Okay.
♪
BROOKE LYNN: And next to Edith,
it's singer, actor,
Judy's daughter,
it's Liza with a zed.
SCARLETT: It's Liza.
She's here.
Hello, hello, hello!
How are you, Brooke?
What'd going on?
BROOKE LYNN: I'm great.
You know, I would love to
see you and JoJo in a fight.
SCARLETT: Oh god, well,
if she keeps it up,
we're gonna have one,
honey, because she needs
a Ritalin,
and I need a goddamn nap,
after I heard that one go on.
LEMON: It would be one
hell of a dance battle.
SCARLETT: Here she goes!
Here she goes!
Okay.
These kids don't know
talent if it hit them.
BROOKE LYNN: Up next,
it's Miss Mariah Carey.
KIARA: Hi, Brooke.
BROOKE LYNN: How are you?
KIARA: I'm good.
I'm good.
Just feels like Christmas.
I'm very excited.
BROOKE LYNN: How are the twins?
KIARA: The twins
are really great.
BROOKE LYNN: And your kids?
Okay, alright.
Well, it's good
to have you here.
KIARA: Hi, guys.
BROOKE LYNN: Look who it is,
porn star, Rebecca More.
ILONA: Yes, I'm a
destroyer.
BROOKE LYNN: Is this your
first time on a game show?
ILONA: You know,
Brooke Lynn, yes.
It is.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: I love a quick,
short, concise answer.
COLIN: Where's Anne Murray?
BROOKE LYNN: Alright,
let's play the Snatch Game!
ILONA: ' love snatch.
BROOKE LYNN: Let's get
to our first question.
Here it is.
Colin, dumb Debra is so dumb,
instead of gravy,
she puts blank on her poutine.
♪
COLIN: She puts
custard on her poutine.
JUSTIN: Custard?
BROOKE LYNN: Custard?
COLIN: Yeah, 'cause she's dumb
and it's not gravy.
BROOKE LYNN: Custard.
Let's see if we have a match.
Let's go to Liza.
Dumb Debra is so dumb,
she puts what on her poutine?
SCARLETT: I put liquor.
BROOKE LYNN: Liquor.
SCARLETT: Because if there's
one thing my mother taught me,
it's how to take a drink
and a bottle of pills
in the same swig.
KIARA: Scarlett's doing
a good job on Liza Minnelli.
For a character she
pulled off like last minute,
like she's doing great.
SCARLETT: Rest in peace, Judy.
BROOKE LYNN: You never
stood a chance, did you?
SCARLETT: I never did.
But look at me now!
I'm ' Liza!
BROOKE LYNN: Miss Cleo.
PRIYANKA: Me know Debra.
BROOKE LYNN: Uh-huh.
PRIYANKA: And she put bleach
because she's so dutty,
she wants to clean
she inside out.
She dumb.
She stupid.
BROOKE LYNN: Well,
because you're psychic,
I expected you would
make a match with Colin.
PRIYANKA: Hm.
Oops.
BROOKE LYNN: Okay.
RITA: Priyanka,
are you sleeping?
What's happening?
Well, I'm not sure
about this Miss Cleo.
BROOKE LYNN: Alright, up next,
let's go to JoJo Siwa.
LEMON: Well, you know,
I don't know Debra,
but I don't like to bully people
'cause I get bullied a lot,
so I just wrote
maybe it's your hair
that keeps falling out--
uh, "haiw."
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: That
is pronounced haiw.
COLIN: Haiw.
LEMON: Yeah, I put hair
on everything I eat,
even if it's not on purpose.
SCARLETT: Did anybody
understand any of that?
Did anybody understand
any of that? [laughter]
ILONA: She needs
a translator.
BROOKE LYNN: Alright,
Joan Rivers.
JIMBO: Okay, let's do it.
BROOKE LYNN: What was
Dumb Debra put on her poutine?
JIMBO: I said ashes.
I like ashes everywhere,
in the morning on my breakfast.
Oh, I'll sprinkle it
on the answer.
[laughter]
JIMBO: Just one second.
Oh, oh gawd.
[laughter]
JIMBO: Just a bit of ashes.
BROOKE LYNN: Next
question, here it is.
Justin.
JUSTIN: Brooke Lynn.
BROOKE LYNN: Jeffrey
Bowyer-Chapman is such a babe,
his fans are always
sending him blank.
Justin?
JUSTIN: Diapers!
BROOKE LYNN: Okay.
Let's start with
Gypsy Rose Blanchard.
BOA: I said money!
JUSTIN: Oh!
BOA: My fans send me money
for my health and stuff,
but we're in Canada, so I just
spend it on computers, wigs,
costumes, and other things
just to impress the boys.
JIMBO: You should use some
of that money to fix that face.
Jesus Christ, that's a face
only a mother could love.
BOA: I will stab you, bitch.
JIMBO: Oh, Christ.
I would love to be murdered
beside this dumb bitch.
LEMON: Yo, wassup?
BROOKE LYNN: Just
out of curiosity,
how did you kill your mother?
BOA: Well
JIMBO: She ate her!
Look at this fat bitch.
[laughter]
[sound of something dropping]
JIMBO: Oh gawd, I'm sorry.
That was my vagina.
ILONA: Jimbo as Joan Rivers,
oh my gosh, Jimbo's killing it.
I almost break
character laughing.
BOA: You okay?
JIMBO: Oh gawd, it's just
my vagina, it drops.
ILONA: Oh, Jimbo did so good.
BROOKE LYNN: Alright, up next.
Edith Piaf.
RITA: I don't have any answer
but I might sing a song for you.
BROOKE LYNN: Absolutely.
JUSTIN: I would love a song.
JIMBO: Here we go.
Kill me now.
RITA: Now
This will be my final act.
Thank you.
[laughter]
JUSTIN: Impressive stuff.
BROOKE LYNN: That
was so beautiful.
RITA: I'm feeling very sleepy.
BROOKE LYNN: Okay.
RITA: These bitches are boring.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Mimi,
what do Jeffrey Bowyer-Chapman's
fans send him?
KIARA: I would love
to get Christmas presents
all year long, honey.
SCARLETT: Oh god,
here we go again.
KIARA: Mm-hm.
Did you buy my new album?
BROOKE LYNN: No.
What's it called?
KIARA: It's called "Honey,
This is Christmas, Baby."
SCARLETT: Oh, god.
BROOKE LYNN: It's called
Honey, apostrophe,
This is Christmas, Baby?
KIARA: Oh yes, honey.
LEMON: Kiara's Mimi is
not quite it.
BROOKE LYNN: I'll be sure
to look for it at Wal-Mart.
KIARA: Thank you.
LEMON: You need a punchline.
You can't just say
a bunch of sentences.
BROOKE LYNN: Up next,
we have Rebecca More.
ILONA: I'm trying to
keep a little bit PG,
so I can get a little bit
more family-friendly gigs.
BROOKE LYNN: Mm-hm.
ILONA: So I said "chicken pics."
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Instead
of "dick pics."
ILONA: Chicken pics.
BROOKE LYNN: Or we could say
" pics" even, maybe?
ILONA: You like ,
Brooke Lynn?
BROOKE LYNN: Could you
do me a favour and spell out
how you pronounce ?
Because I'm very curious to
see what that looks like.
ILONA: C
Ock.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Alright, Joan.
JIMBO: I just wrote "help".
Melissa, if you're
watching this,
get me the hell out of here.
I keep clicking my goddamn
heels together like Judy.
SCARLETT: Don't you talk
about my mother like that!
JIMBO: Your mother and I
invented the Snatch Game, okay?
You miss your mother?
Smell my goddamn fingers.
[laughter]
SCARLETT: Get your
fingers out of my face!
ILONA: I'll '
smell your fingers, yeah.
JIMBO: Oh my god!
BROOKE LYNN: We really
should move on, ladies.
JIMBO: Someone have
my finger removed.
BROOKE LYNN: Alright, enough.
You are all wrong.
ILONA: You
' like that?
BROOKE LYNN: Okay,
Colin, it's back to you.
Freaky Franny is so freaky,
when she pole dances,
she uses a blank.
COLIN: A hockey stick.
JUSTIN: Yes!
BROOKE LYNN: JoJo,
I'm sure you have an answer.
LEMON: I sure do got an answer.
The way I pole dance,
which I love to dance,
I always do it on a Pixie Stick
filled with cocaine.
[laughter]
RITA: I would like to have some.
LEMON: Thanks, Joan.
I'm having the best time
ever here at the Snatch Game.
How are you feeling?
'Cause I'm feeling really good.
This is great!
'Ey!
SCARLETT: Someone get that
child an Adderall or something.
BROOKE LYNN: Up next,
Mariah Carey.
KIARA: As artists,
it's important to remember
that we always dance
with our emotions.
BROOKE LYNN: So, what
is your answer, Mimi?
KIARA: Emotions.
BROOKE LYNN: Emotions.
Okay, thank you.
Liza?
SCARLETT: Well, I don't know
much about dancing on poles,
so I just put "new wig"
because when you're tired
of your shitty old one,
just throw on a new one,
and you'll be good to go!
[laughter]
SCARLETT: Good to go,
darling, good to go!
BROOKE LYNN: Edith, my dear,
what did you write down?
RITA: So I just
write down "magic."
You know, just like these pills,
it's magical. [snoring]
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Edith,
Edith, wake up.
RITA: Where the are we?
[laughter]
LEMON: Rita is so in character,
and I am living for Edith Piaf.
SCARLETT: Tell her
to go back to bed.
BROOKE LYNN: I'm sorry,
but that's not a match.
[Rita snoring]
BROOKE LYNN: Alright,
this may be a huge mistake,
but I have one more question.
Colin, the surgeon said,
"This queen I'm operating on
"must be a magician.
"When I reached in to pull out
her appendix, I got a blank."
COLIN: A white rabbit.
[laughter]
PRIYANKA: I'm sitting
there looking around,
being like, "Oh,
all these girls are gonna
"come with funny answers.
What am I gonna do?"
BROOKE LYNN: Let's see
how many matches you got.
Okay, celebrities.
Miss Cleo.
SCARLETT: Oh, god.
PRIYANKA: Listen, Miss Cleo
knows all and she sees all.
BROOKE LYNN: Mm-hm,
except for everything.
[laughter]
PRIYANKA: I said
"a bottle of rum,"
because them queens
love to drink.
♪
SCARLETT: Can someone
get me a drink, please?
PRIYANKA: I'm so bad,
oh my god!
BROOKE LYNN: Oh, no match.
Um, Edith?
Instead of an appendix,
what did the surgeon pull out?
RITA: I just wrote "coffin."
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: He pulled a coffin?
RITA: Can you please
bring me my coffin back?
I am tired of this shit show.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Unfortunately,
not a match,
but we will get working
on that coffin for you.
[laughter]
KIARA: A bottle of champagne
because I need a drink.
ILONA: Share that drink.
KIARA: I don't want to share it.
I want one.
SCARLETT: I think we lost one.
BROOKE LYNN: And that is all
the time we have for today!
And the winner of
the Snatch Game is
the town of Dildo,
Newfoundland!
JIMBO: Oh, gawd.
BROOKE LYNN: Colin and Justin,
thanks so much for playing,
and we will see you next
time on the Snatch Game.
♪
♪
♪
BOA: Ooh, we're here!
SCARLETT: We're here
to make it clear.
BOA: So ladies, we are the first
ever queens to do Snatch Game
on Canada's Drag Race!
[all cheering]
SCARLETT: I feel like
that was an iconic
Canadian her-story moment.
PRIYANKA: I feel like I made
history with the worst
Canadian Snatch Game ever!
ILONA: Priyanka, can you
stop playing the victim?
[oohing & laughter]
SCARLETT: How are you feeling?
Are you feeling
a little nervous?
KIARA: I'm good with improv
when I make my own characters
and when I feel some freedom.
But I feel like, with Mariah,
I had to like really stick to it
and didn't know how
to get out of it,
and how to make people laugh.
KIARA: I regret that I didn't do
a good job at the Snatch Game,
so I'm gonna do my best
on the runway,
and do my best to
stay in the competition.
KIARA: Yeah.
SCARLETT: So guys,
I'm so excited
it's Night of
a Thousand Celines!
[all cheering]
SCARLETT: Let's do it!
♪
♪
ILONA: I hope I make
Celine Dion proud.
SCARLETT: We better.
[laughter]
LEMON: So Jimbo, how do you feel
like you did in Snatch Game?
JIMBO: I had so much fun.
LEMON: I thought
you were so good.
JIMBO: Doing that
is my favourite thing.
JIMBO: I love when people laugh,
and I love making people laugh.
JIMBO: It was funny to see like
the key to Brooke Lynn's humour.
You know when you hear that
sound that's like inescapable.
LEMON: Yeah.
JIMBO: My childhood
was really chaotic.
When I was in school,
I was judged so much
about being gay or feminine.
I was very awkward.
I had no friends.
I wore different
clothes than other people.
I was interested in different
things than other people
and I didn't really fit in.
But in grade 10,
I was on the bus,
I made a joke,
and everyone laughed.
Being myself in that moment
paid off, and from that moment,
I started to just rely on
my sense of humour
and to be more myself,
and I was able to make friends.
It's a really powerful
message to show people that
you can be stepped on
but you can rise up.
PRIYANKA: Kiara?
KIARA: Yes?
PRIYANKA: Does your dad
know you do drag?
KIARA: My stepdad, yeah.
PRIYANKA: Okay.
What about your?
KIARA: My biological dad,
like my parents
separated when I was three.
I was not really close with him.
PRIYANKA: Okay.
KIARA: Like he wanted me to,
you know, have like a--
like a
PRIYANKA: Man job?
KIARA: Yeah, a man job
or whatever,
and I never felt like that.
You know, I always wanted
to have like his approval,
in a way,
but I never really like
PRIYANKA: Got it?
KIARA: got it.
KIARA: I feel like
everybody wants approval
from their parents.
It's just natural, I think.
KIARA: If I'm
successful at what I do,
I feel like he will be happy.
KIARA: Drag is an art,
like any other,
so I just hope that he sees it
as not just like a hobby
but really like
a passion and a career.
BOA: I'm gonna make
Celine so proud.
Are you guys?
[all cheering]
SCARLETT: Oh, yeah.
This is the one runway
that none of us can up
because we're Canadian.
LEMON: And Brooke Lynn
did it already.
[laughter]
♪
♪
♪
Covergirl,
put the bass in your walk ♪
Head to toe
Let your whole body talk
JEFFREY: Oh, she's going
that way. [laughs]
And what?
[applause]
MARY: Welcome to the main stage
of Canada's Drag Race.
I'm Mary Walsh,
and I am over the moon thrilled
to be the extra
special guest host.
[applause]
MARY: Stacey McKenzie,
there you are.
Jeffrey Bowyer-Chapman,
you are so cute.
Miss Brooke Lynn Hytes,
have you ever tasted cod tongue?
BROOKE LYNN: [laughs]
I'm sorry.
I don't speak
East Coast lesbian.
[laughter]
MARY: This week, the queens
were challenged to give us
their best celebrity
impressions in Canada's
very first Snatch Game.
And tonight, on the runway,
category is "Night of
a Thousand Celines."
Gentlemen, start your engines,
and may the best woman win!
♪
MARY: First up, Boa.
BROOKE LYNN: Fringe, fringe,
fringe across the board.
BOA: This look is inspired
by Celine at the Met Gala.
I am serving car wash
realness in this gorgeous
feather headpiece,
and this almost
floor-length fringe.
Do you need a wash?
Full service, honey.
JEFFREY: No headdress
for the wicked.
MARY: Shave your armpits.
[laughter]
MARY: Next up, Scarlett BoBo.
STACEY: Poof, there it is.
BROOKE LYNN: Satin-her?
I don't even know her.
SCARLETT: I'm honouring Celine
Dion with my Paris Fashion Week
bedtime eleganza.
JEFFREY: Oh, it's so
hard to get out of bed.
BROOKE LYNN: Just
take it with you.
SCARLETT: I'm serving you soft
face, this cute little bun,
this elegant,
off-the-shoulder dress.
I'm like, "Oh, look at
my glittery collarbones."
MARY: Kiara.
JEFFREY: Ruffles
all dressed, bitch.
STACEY: A new gay has come.
KIARA: Tonight, the fantasy is
Celine album release realness.
I am serving legs on the runway.
I'm serving ruffles.
I'm feeling sexy
in this ponytail.
BROOKE LYNN: A French exit.
JUDGES: Au revoir.
STACEY: Sortie.
MARY: Rita Baga.
BROOKE LYNN: I will
sell this house today.
RITA: The inspiration is Celine
before and after the fame.
I'm serving you '80s
ugly realness, and ooh,
a little reveal.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh!
RITA: She's wearing
a black sequin dress.
She looks lovely.
JEFFREY: Her heart
does go on, and on
JEFFREY & MARY: and on.
RITA: She's strutting.
She's walking.
She's goofing all around,
just like the Celine we know.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh,
the duck walk of shame.
I know it well.
MARY: Jimbo.
JEFFREY: Oh!
MARY: Oh!
JIMBO: I am inspired by
Celine Dion Paris Fashion Week.
MARY: Drill sergeant
Celine Dion.
BROOKE LYNN: Drive all night
and drop and give them 20.
JIMBO: I'm sparkling
from head to toe,
showing off my
rhinestone glasses
and my rhinestone shoulders.
I've just escaped from
Celine Dion boot camp,
and I'm here
to serve you fashion.
STACEY: Are those shoulders
the Dion quintuplets?
[laughter]
MARY: Next is Lemon.
LEMON: I am serving you
her 1998 Oscars performance,
where she won an Oscar.
BROOKE LYNN: Queer, far,
wherever you are.
LEMON: I feel gorgeous
in this dress,
and I feel like I am
the heart of the ocean.
Didn't the old lady drop it
in the ocean in the end?
Well, baby, I went down
and got it for you.
MARY: Next up, Ilona Verley.
ILONA: I'm doing Celine Dion
and Elsa Schiaparelli, 2017.
I want to show the judges that
I can walk in an actual heel.
I'm giving you
"find the life alert
'cause I'm about to drop dead
in these shoes."
BROOKE LYNN: My EKG machine
just says "slut."
ILONA: She's rhinestoned.
She's glistening.
She's letting
the judges have it.
MARY: Is she wearing
a life jacket on her bottom?
MARY: And Priyanka.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh,
here comes the bride.
MARY: Oh!
PRIYANKA: Look at
this wedding dress!
It is the exact replica
of the one she wore.
STACEY: She's father
and the bride.
PRIYANKA: And shablam,
there's another dress
under the wedding dress!
I am serving her
icon award dress.
Thank you so much.
Thank you and goodnight.
♪
MARY: Well, welcome, ladies.
STACEY: Based on your
performance in the Snatch Game,
and your runway presentation,
we've made some decisions.
When I call your name,
please step forward.
Ilona Verley
Scarlett BoBo
You are both safe.
You may leave the stage
and head back to the workroom.
♪
STACEY: Ladies, you represent
the tops and the bottoms
of this week.
♪
MARY: It's now time
for the judges' critiques.
STACEY: First up, Boa.
Brooke Lynn, what did
you think of her performance
on Snatch Game?
BROOKE LYNN: It wasn't as good
as I wanted you to be.
BOA: Okay.
BROOKE LYNN: With the makeup,
I would have loved you
to have gone sicker with it,
more red under the eyes.
As for this look,
there's way too much fringe.
I completely lose
your shape in this.
STACEY: Jeffrey.
JEFFREY: So in your Snatch Game,
I felt like you were
a little bit scared of
making fun of her.
BOA: I didn't want to
get like too crazy.
I should have just
went full force.
I could have gave you
the craziest act I've ever done,
and I held back.
JEFFREY: You certainly did.
This look tonight, I can see
that you were padded
and you were cinched,
but we can't see any of that.
STACEY: In your Snatch Game,
you were holding back.
BOA: Well
STACEY: And I knew
you had it in you
to just like let
loose and let go.
Don't be afraid to do that.
BOA: Yeah.
STACEY: Jeffrey, what
did you think of Kiara?
JEFFREY: You seemed so confident
in your choice of Mariah Carey.
KIARA: Yeah.
JEFFREY: And then, when you
had to deliver as Mariah Carey,
where did she go?
KIARA: She went
Mariah Scary, honey.
She, uh, I don't
know where she went.
I got stuck.
BROOKE LYNN: Mariah Carey
is an extremely hard person
to make funny and it didn't
work for you, unfortunately.
On the runway,
you look gorgeous.
The outfit is gorgeous.
I love it.
It's simplistic,
but you have to be so careful
when you do a ponytail wig.
It doesn't look great.
MARY: Well, I have to
disagree about the hair.
I really liked the hair.
KIARA: Thank you.
MARY: But Mariah Carey,
it's all breasts with me
and Mariah Carey.
You know what I mean?
That's all I ever see.
STACEY: She's always
like sexed out.
Even if you were just
to be like whatever.
You know,
and just be showing titties.
KIARA: Yeah.
STACEY: It would have
given the character more
of a Mariah feel to it.
KIARA: Yeah.
STACEY: Next up, Rita Baga.
MARY: It really interests me
when people do things
that aren't glamourous,
when people do characters.
RITA: Can you please
bring me my coffin back?
I'm tired of this shit show.
BROOKE LYNN: Everyone was
kind of doing this with you,
like, "What is
she gonna do next?"
One of my favourite Snatch Games
I've ever seen ever.
RITA: Oh, thank you.
BROOKE LYNN: Your runway look,
a very odd choice for Celine
looks when there are so many.
MARY: What were you
going for with that walk?
RITA: In Love Can
Move Mountains,
she spent the entire song
doing that, like this.
MARY: Oh!
JEFFREY: Everyone in Quebec
has a crazy French aunt
that's just like Celine Dion,
so I got it.
STACEY: You killed it again.
RITA: Thank you!
STACEY: Great job.
RITA: Merci beaucoup.
STACEY: Next is Jimbo.
MARY: I thought you were
great as Joan Rivers.
JIMBO: Oh!
Oh, gawd!
MARY: You did enough changes
and surprising things
to keep me with you.
I was really very impressed.
Thank you very much.
BROOKE LYNN: Did you have
fun during Snatch Game?
JIMBO: I had
the time of my life.
MARY: Often, that's the secret
to the whole thing, isn't it?
When somebody's
having a good time,
you can't help but go
along with them, right?
STACEY: When it came
to the runway, hello.
You had everybody's mouth
dropped from the time
you walked out
to the time you walked off.
JIMBO: Thank you so much.
STACEY: Big up yourself Jimbo.
BROOKE LYNN: Big up
yourself as well.
[laughter]
MARY: Do what?
STACEY: It's a Jamaican thing.
JEFFREY: It's a
black thing, honey.
It's a black thing.
JIMBO: Yes, thank you.
STACEY: What did you
think about Lemon?
BROOKE LYNN: You
were magnificent.
LEMON: I just wrote maybe it's
her hair that keeps falling out.
Uh, "haiw."
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: This is
a Snatch Game
people are going to remember
for a very long time.
JEFFREY: I didn't
know who JoJo was.
I don't care that I didn't
know who JoJo was
because you showed me who she is
and I want more of her.
You were so present.
You paid attention to everything
that everybody was doing.
It was perfect.
However, on the runway tonight,
I was so disappointed
after what you delivered
in Snatch Game.
It's kind of basic.
It's iconic.
I get it.
Titanic, blah, blah, blah.
But I need to see that
personality shine through
on the runway too.
LEMON: Right.
JEFFREY: Remember that.
LEMON: Okay.
MARY: Sometimes, when I'm
dressed up in a completely
ridiculous felt costume with
gold glue around my breasts,
and a plastic sword, and I'm
ambushing the prime minister,
I sometimes feel so stupid
that I decide,
" it, I'm just
gonna go for it anyway."
You did a great job, and you
completely committed to it,
and that's what it
takes, isn't it?
LEMON: Yes.
MARY: But I don't think
anybody could act their way
out of that dress.
It just covers
you up completely.
LEMON: Yes, of course.
MARY: You should give yourself
a chance to shine forth,
not behind navy blue jersey.
BROOKE LYNN: When you're wearing
something that simplistic,
you have to have
more shape to your body.
I would have loved to have seen
a really tiny cinched waist.
LEMON: Yes.
BROOKE LYNN: I would
have loved to see a pad.
And it just would have
elevated it a bit for me.
STACEY: You were
brilliant in Snatch Game.
I didn't know who
JoJo was, at first,
so I ended up Googling,
and I'm like, "This is
the same person."
[laughter]
LEMON: Thank you.
STACEY: Thank you, Lemon.
Priyanka.
BROOKE LYNN: This runway look,
you could have walked out
in either one of those
by themselves,
and I would have
been okay with it.
And then you put them together,
and it was like
MARY: I loved everything
you did on the runway.
The whole look was
fabulous, and then,
for you to do brilliant
Celine moves, brilliant runway.
Thank you very much.
PRIYANKA: Thank you.
JEFFREY: Oh, hi, Priyanka.
PRIYANKA: Oh no,
I've been dreading this.
Hi, Jeffrey!
JEFFREY: Tell me what
I'm thinking right now.
PRIYANKA: It was really bad.
JEFFREY: Your choice
of Miss Cleo,
it was an interesting choice.
PRIYANKA: Call me now!
JEFFREY: There were
so many places to go,
and you didn't go to
any of those places.
BROOKE LYNN: Because
you're psychic,
I expected you would
make a match with Colin.
PRIYANKA: Hm.
Oops.
MARY: You know, sometimes
when you're working with
other people, and they're
doing something amazing,
just repeat the lines
that the funny person said.
[laughter]
Use other people's energy
because that's what
improvisation is about,
and improvisation
is about saying yes.
So, you know, you're
not all alone there,
just trying to create this
character by yourself.
You've got all these
other people that you can
work with and off.
PRIYANKA: I up real bad.
BROOKE LYNN: Yeah.
It was very one-note.
PRIYANKA: Oh!
I'm so embarrassed.
STACEY: Thank you, ladies.
You may untuck in the workroom
while we deliberate.
♪
[snoring]
[piano lullaby]
JIMBO: BoBo and Ilona
are sleeping?
This isn't Romper Room, bitch.
Wake up, girl!
BOA: Boo! [laughter]
JIMBO: Oh my god, you guys
talked yourself to sleep?
[laughter]
SCARLETT: What happened?
What's the T?
ILONA: Who's in the bottom?
Who's lip synching?
SCARLETT: Uh-oh.
ILONA: Who's it gonna be?
KIARA: Okay,
so I'm in the bottom.
They didn't like
my Snatch Game.
They thought I did
not embody Mariah.
SCARLETT: What about you two?
BOA: So they said I held
back with Gypsy Rose.
I picked a character
and I should have gone
all the way with it because
she was just so .
KIARA: I was surprised
for Priyanka's critique.
I feel like you might be safe.
BOA: I think you're safe.
PRIYANKA: I don't know.
I really bombed
the maxi challenge.
LEMON: But they loved your look.
KIARA: So who deserves
to win this week?
SCARLETT: Miss Cleo,
what do you think?
Can you see a vision?
JIMBO: Miss Cleo, tell us,
what's the future?!
LEMON: No, she can't.
Kiki.
KIARA: Yes.
LEMON: How are you feeling now?
KIARA: I feel ready to destroy
anybody who is up against me.
[all groaning]
KIARA: Kiki wanna fight, fight.
PRIYANKA: [slurps]
[burps]
STACEY: Just between
us A-listers
BROOKE LYNN: Don't
you mean C-listers?
JEFFREY: I think
she means D-listers.
MARY: Is this about cup size?
[laughter]
JEFFREY: Something like that.
STACEY: Let's start with Boa.
You know, I was really
disappointed in Boa
in Snatch Game.
You know, I was
expecting to get more.
BROOKE LYNN: She held back,
and Snatch Game is the one place
you cannot hold back.
On the runway, I just lost
her completely in that outfit.
You don't need that much fringe
to get the point
of fringe across.
STACEY: Oh my gosh, Kiara
as Mariah Carey-- ugh.
BROOKE LYNN: I didn't see
any like effort to be Mariah
when she was doing it.
And it was so bizarre because
we know she's such a good actor,
we've seen
in the past challenges.
STACEY: And she just looks
so beautiful, but then,
when she opened her mouth,
it was just like, no.
MARY: I thought she did
great in the runway look.
I love the runway look.
BROOKE LYNN: Well, you're wrong.
MARY: No, I'm not, Brooke Lynn.
[laughter]
I am right.
STACEY: Oh my gosh,
Rita Baga as Edith Piaf.
With her every move,
I wanted to know
what she was gonna do next.
JEFFREY: She paid such
close attention to the nuance
of who this person was.
I was very underwhelmed
by the white ensemble,
when she first came out
on the runway, but thank god,
she pulled that away
and gave us that lack look
because it was really so fun.
STACEY: Loved Jimbo
as Joan Rivers.
Funny, hilarious.
JEFFREY: She was channelling
every ounce of her,
and I was living for it.
MARY: She looked
like Joan Rivers.
She sounded like Joan Rivers.
She just stayed Joan Rivers
the whole time.
BROOKE LYNN: She did not let me
down for a second in that
Snatch Game, nor did she
let me down on that runway.
I really appreciated the way
she elevated that Celine look.
She sequined it
and made it drag.
JEFFREY: Lemon blew
my mind as JoJo.
MARY: She completely
committed to it.
She was really, really good.
STACEY: She was brilliant.
JEFFREY: She just shines when
it comes to acting challenges.
I just really want
to see her do that
when it comes to the runway.
STACEY: Oh my gosh,
Priyanka did Miss Cleo.
I was shocked.
She didn't bring nothing
to that character.
She was just bland.
BROOKE LYNN: It was
so disappointing,
especially because
she has been so on it
this entire competition.
MARY: Priyanka could
have so easily interacted
with all the rest
of the contestants.
Every time somebody
said something,
she could have said, "I knew
she was going to say that."
You know what I mean?
[laughter]
JEFFREY: It was hers to lose
and she lost hard.
STACEY: So, have we made
our final decision?
BROOKE LYNN: I think so.
STACEY: Bring back our Celines.
MARY: Welcome back, my queens.
STACEY: Ladies, based on
your runway presentation,
and Snatch Game,
we've made some decisions.
Jimbo, on the runway,
you served us elevated Celine,
and in the Snatch Game, your
Joan was the right kind of mean.
Rita Baga, the smaller you got,
the bigger we laughed.
Your vie en rose bloomed,
and girl, we died.
Jimbo
Con-drag-ulations.
LEMON: Yay!
[applause]
STACEY: You are the winner
of this week's challenge.
JIMBO: Oh my god, thank you.
Thank you, Joan.
[laughter]
STACEY: You have won a fabulous
7-day Caribbean cruise for two,
courtesy of Pitbull Events.
JIMBO: [wild laughter]
[cheering & applause]
JIMBO: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
JIMBO: I won,
and I am so excited.
This is what
I came here to do.
JIMBO: [Rivers] Oh my gawd,
get it to-goddam-gether.
You're going on
a cruise!
Aah!
Oh my gawd!
STACEY: You may join
the other girls.
JIMBO: Thank you again.
[applause & cheering]
STACEY: Rita Baga
You are safe.
You may leave the stage.
STACEY: Lemon
You are safe.
You may join the other girls.
STACEY: Kiara, all we wanted
for Christmas was good snatch,
and on the runway, all you
delivered was a pretty package.
Boa, as Gypsy Rose,
you should have murdered.
But on the runway,
where did you hide the body?
Priyanka, in the Snatch Game,
your medium sadly crossed over,
which means, Boa
you're safe.
You may join the other girls.
BOA: Thank you.
BOA: Good luck, Kiara.
STACEY: Kiara, Priyanka,
you're up for elimination.
♪
STACEY: Two queens
stand before us.
Prior to tonight,
you were asked to prepare
a lip synch performance
of Celine Dion's
"I Drove All Night."
This is your last chance
to impress us
and save yourself
from elimination.
♪
MARY: The time has come, ladies,
for you to lip synch
for your life.
♪
KIARA: If I want to stay
in this competition,
I have to show that I'm more
than just a pretty package,
and that I'm here for a reason,
and it's to perform.
PRIYANKA: I'm up
for elimination.
I knew this was gonna happen.
All I'm thinking, "Just perform
the song and show the world
"why you make everybody
say your name, Priyanka."
MARY: Good luck, and don't
it up, for 's sake.
♪
♪
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Wa-da-da-da
Oh yeah
[oh yeah, oh yeah] ♪
I had to escape
The city was
sticky and cruel ♪
Maybe I should
have called you first ♪
But I was dying
to get to you ♪
I was dreaming while I drove
The long straight road ahead
Uh-huh
Yeah ♪
Could taste your sweet kisses,
your arms open wide ♪
This fever for you was
just burning me up inside ♪
♪
♪
I drove all night
to get to you ♪
♪
Is that all right?
I drove all night,
crept in your room ♪
♪
Woke you from your sleep
to make love to you ♪
Is that all right?
I drove all night
What in this world
keeps us from falling apart? ♪
♪
No matter where I go
I hear the beating
of our one heart ♪
I think about you when
the night is cold and dark ♪
Uh-huh
Yeah ♪
No one can move me
the way that you do ♪
Nothing erases this feeling
between me and you ♪
♪
I drove all night
to get to you ♪
♪
Is that all right?
I drove all night,
crept in your room ♪
Woke you from your sleep
To make love to you
Is that all right?
I drove all night
♪
♪
I taste your sweet kisses,
your arms open wide ♪
This fever for you was
just burning me up inside ♪
♪
I drove all night
♪
♪
I drove all night
To get to you
JEFFREY: Yes!
[cheering & applause]
JEFFREY: Well done, ladies.
Well done.
[cheering & applause]
♪
♪
♪
STACEY: We have
made our decision.
Priyanka
Chanté, you stay.
[applause]
You may join the others.
♪
♪
STACEY: Kiara,
we expected fierce.
We were surprised
by your funny.
And now your future
is unlimited.
Now, sashay away.
KIARA: Thank you
so much, everybody.
JEFFREY: We love you, honey.
[applause]
KIARA: Love you, guys.
BOA: Love you, Kiki!
QUEEN: Sissies for life, girl!
KIARA: Kiki want to be
on all-stars, okay?
[laughter]
QUEEN: We love you!
KIARA: I'm proud of myself.
I think I could have done
better, especially with Mariah.
If you're watching this,
I'm sorry.
Drag is my life.
It's very important
to me and, you know,
I don't feel like I would
fit anywhere without drag.
I'm really proud to represent
Montreal on this first season
of Canada's Drag Race.
, I didn't win!
But you knew that already.
[chuckles]
♪
STACEY: Con-drag-ulations,
everybody.
And remember, stay true
north strong and fierce.
Now let the music play.
You wear it well
Lipstick,
lipstick painted on ♪
You wear it well
That sure suits
you-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh ♪
Work it for me
Work it for me, me
You wear it
You wear it
You wear it well
RUPAUL: Next time
on Canada's Drag Race
JEFFREY: You'll be
getting downright judicial
in your very own late-night
law firm commercials.
STACEY: Action.
STACEY: [gasps]
LEMON: I've split my kitty!
SCARLETT & ILONA: [screaming]
ILONA: She literally
whams me with a book.
JIMBO: It's my special day!
[laughter]
STACEY: You're very special.
There's something
special about you.
JEFFREY: Welcome to
the competition, honey.
BROOKE LYNN: I would like to
hear from each and every one
of you which one of your sisters
should go home tonight and why.
LEMON: I'm not here
to make friends anymore.
TOM: I'm just happy to be here.
[laughter]
♪
♪
♪
♪
♪
♪
on Canada's Drag Race
STACEY: You will be
working in teams
to create an iconic fashion line
made entirely from
recyclable materials.
JIMBO: What do you guys think
if I make a crown with these?
TYNOMI: I'm not going out on the
runway without a cohesive look.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh, wow.
JEFFREY: Rita Baga,
con-drag-ulations.
You are the winner of
this week's challenge.
RITA: Woo!
JEFFREY: Team Paper.
STACEY: I would love to have
seen a little bit more couture.
ILONA: Jimbo had this really
cool idea to be our queen.
JEFFREY: Well, I like
the idea for Jimbo as well.
BROOKE LYNN: It looks like I
should hang you in my backyard
and beat you with a stick.
JEFFREY: Ilona Verley,
chanté, you stay.
ILONA: [gasps]
JEFFREY: Tynomi Banks
Sashay away.
♪
♪
♪
ILONA: [tearfully]
Sisters for life.
ILONA: Another Toronto girl
has left the building.
ILONA: "Love life, be you,
Tynomi Banks."
ILONA: I'm so grateful
that I'm still here,
but it's so hard
when it's bittersweet.
It just sucks.
ILONA: I love you, Tynomi.
♪
RITA: I think Tynomi is
one of the greatest queens
that we have here in Canada.
She has been an inspiration,
and I will miss her deeply.
But I came here to win,
so I better work.
SCARLETT: This game
feels so real now.
It feels like this room
is getting empty.
PRIYANKA: It's like
every woman for themselves.
LEMON: Every week
it feels like a family--
like a real family member
is dipping.
It's so sad.
KIARA: Yeah.
PRIYANKA: Except
for when Kyne left.
I didn't care.
[laughter]
BOA: Oh, you bitch!
You're the devil, bitch!
You're the devil.
I have this theory that Priyanka
is possessed by the devil
because she's so perfect
and she's here to take over
the world as a drag queen.
PRIYANKA: [laughs]
RITA: So she's not perfect.
Have you seen her ears?
[cheetah sound effect]
[laughter]
PRIYANKA: [giggles]
PRIYANKA: This week
I'm on my game.
I have to be.
Being voted "Best Local
Drag Queen of Toronto,"
there's so much
like riding on me.
And now that Tynomi is gone,
I think that
I'm a top contender.
PRIYANKA: I'm very
excited to win $100,000.
It's gonna be really cool.
LEMON: I'm very excited to
watch you not win $100,000.
PRIYANKA: [laughs]
JIMBO: Someone has
to go home next.
I'm kind of wondering who
the next bitch is gonna be.
ILONA: Ah-ha-ow!
This thing just paper cut me!
♪
RUPAUL: The winner of
Canada's Drag Race receives
a year of hotel
stays from Hilton,
and a cash prize of $100,000.
With Jeffrey Bowyer-Chapman,
Stacey McKenzie,
and Brooke Lynn Hytes.
With tonight's extra special
guest host, Mary Walsh.
♪
♪
PRIYANKA: Oop!
LEMON: [laughs]
LEMON: Top 8, doll.
JIMBO: Top 8.
ILONA: It's a new day
in the workroom,
and I'm thankfully still here,
but we're all kind of getting
at each other's throats
a little bit at this point.
LEMON: Tensions were
pretty high last week.
ILONA: Having to
lip sync for my life,
like, when the song started,
I almost was just gonna
walk off the stage.
I stood there when it was over
looking around, being like,
"I'm fine if I leave tonight."
PRIYANKA: But that's
so disrespectful.
SCARLETT: Stupid!
PRIYANKA: That's
so disrespectful
to the competition,
to the judges, to us.
PRIYANKA: We're
gonna play many cards
during this competition.
Just don't play
the victim card, okay?
ILONA: How was I playing
the victim card, girl?
PRIYANKA: Because you're
like, "Feel bad for me.
"I want to go home.
It's too stressful.
"I don't want to
send my friend home."
ILONA: I was feeling
my own emotions,
which are mine to have,
and how dare you tell me
how to feel, Priyanka?
PRIYANKA: Okay, sorry.
I apologize.
ILONA: Yeah, thank you.
JIMBO: Well, thank you!
LEMON: I guess tensions
are still high.
[tense laughter]
[siren]
PRIYANKA: [screams]
RUPAUL: O Canada!
She done already
done had herses.
Hello, my queens.
KIARA: Hi, little girl.
RUPAUL: Wait.
What was I about to say?
Oh, it's all coming
back to me now.
Near, far, wherever you are,
it's time to make
a titanic impression,
and if we move in unison,
then love can move mountains.
SCARLETT: Ahh!
KIARA: Ah, Celina.
RUPAUL: And that's
the way it is.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Mama's homo!
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Is it bad luck
to wear sunglasses indoors?
I wish I cared.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: But sunglasses
are the best protection
against harmful, shady gays.
[oohing from the queens]
ILONA: Oh no!
BROOKE LYNN: Can we get
some protection up in here?
Oh, pit crew!
[oohs & aahs from queens]
BROOKE LYNN: You guessed it,
my lambs.
In the grand tradition of
Paris, Ontario, is Burning
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Today's mini
challenge is all about reading.
BOA: Oh my god!
BROOKE LYNN: Because
reading is what?
QUEENS: Fundamental!
BROOKE LYNN: One at a time,
you will come stand with me,
select a beautiful, stylish pair
of Bailey Nelson sunglasses,
and dewy decimate
these bitches to filth.
SCARLETT: Yes!
BROOKE LYNN: The library
of Canada is officially open.
BOA: Oh my god!
BROOKE LYNN: Okay,
Priyanka, come on down.
Select a pair of sunglasses.
PRIYANKA: Oh.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Alright,
at your will.
PRIYANKA: Scarlett BoBo,
your face is like your spot
in this competition--
filler.
SCARLETT: Ahh!
[laughter]
PRIYANKA: Kiara, you are
just finally understanding
how to speak English, but now,
when will you finally
understand how to do drag?
Was that bad?
LEMON: [laughs]
BROOKE LYNN: It wasn't
your best work.
[laughter]
PRIYANKA: Let's move on.
PRIYANKA: Jimbo, I was so
excited to finally see you
out of drag for the first time,
but really, it's all the same.
Mediocre.
[gasps & laughter]
JIMBO: Okurr.
ILONA: Hi, poors.
First up, Boa,
Bitch On Arrival.
When are you gonna
show up, girl?
[oohing & laughter]
BOA: That was good,
that was good, that was good.
ILONA: BoBo, you should really
change your last name to Hobo
because your drag is
more than pedestrian.
BROOKE LYNN: Wouldn't that
be less than pedestrian?
JIMBO: Yeah.
SCARLETT: Yes!
ILONA: No, it's like--
like more than just pedestrian.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh.
Oh.
ILONA: Oh my god, I live.
Okay, Rita Baga, you're only
in your 30s but you paint like
you're trying to get
the seniors' discount
at the supermarket.
BROOKE LYNN: That's
'cause she's a smart bitch.
RITA: Mm-hm!
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Let her rip, girl.
BOA: Priyanka, it's so crazy
how you can paint so fast.
We paint one face,
and you paint two faces.
PRIYANKA: Oh, 'cause I'm shady?
BOA: Yeah.
PRIYANKA: Ah, you got it!
BOA: Lemon, can
you hold my drink?
I always love putting
it on a coaster.
[laughter]
♪
LEMON: That was a good one.
That was a good one.
SCARLETT: Ilona Verley,
in drag you give us
Morticia Addams.
Out of drag, Uncle Fester.
[laughter]
SCARLETT: Kiara, I never
understood the term
"loose lips" until I met you.
You get used more than a
revolving door during rush hour.
[laughter]
KIARA: Oh my god.
SCARLETT: Rita Baga,
the only thing worse than
your drag closet
is your piss poor attitude.
RITA: I'm sorry?
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: It's
not a bad attitude.
She's French Canadian.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Thank you, BoBo.
PRIYANKA: Ah, I'm so scared!
KIARA: Boa, I'd love
to take you to the gym,
not to work out with you, but
to use you as my exercise ball.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Lemon,
I know you have a lot to say.
SCARLETT: Oh, those are cute.
PRIYANKA: Really cute on you.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh, don't try
to be nice now, bitches.
LEMON: Priyanka,
you talk about having sex a lot,
but the only thing
you're is stupid.
[laughter]
BOA: You in danger, bitch!
[laughter]
LEMON: Kiara, are you a bird?
Because all your runways are
cheap, cheap, cheap, cheap!
[oohing & screaming]
LEMON: Rita Baga,
last week I saw you
playing with the plastics,
and I saw that there
was a slinky there,
and you really remind
me of a slinky because
I don't know what you're
good at, but I'd love to
push you down the stairs.
ILONA: Oh!
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Good job, Lemon.
LEMON: Coasting where?
BROOKE LYNN: Jimbo.
JIMBO: Ilona, someone
get this bitch a medal.
She's a broken record--
sickening, work, I'm living.
[laughter]
ILONA: Oh!
JIMBO: Kiara, was
your mom a bird?
Because you're
pigeon-toed, bitch!
SCARLETT: Ah!
KIARA: Pigeon-toed?
BROOKE LYNN: Surprise.
JIMBO: Lemon,
you're so full of yourself,
you could be
a lemon meringue pie--
light and fluffy on top
with a crusty little bottom.
[laughter]
[laughter]
JIMBO: Rita Baga,
you think you're all that
and a bag-achips, but I'm
getting more bag-agarbage.
ILONA: Oh!
JIMBO: But I'm not.
I actually think
you're incredible.
ILONA: Don't say it.
JIMBO: I'm sorry.
That's the worst.
Bad Jimbo.
Bad Jimbo.
Bad!
RITA: Priyanka, so apparently
you are DTF,
but to me you're more QTL--
questionable taste level.
PRIYANKA: Ah!
[laughter]
RITA: Okay,
hold on five seconds.
♪
Okay, can we
just embrace the fact
that Ilona wasn't complaining
for five seconds, please?
ILONA: Oh!
[laughter]
RITA: And I'm grateful
that we have this
opportunity to do
Drag Race, so finally,
a Canadian can win Drag Race.
ILONA: Oh!
RITA: Thank you!
ILONA: She just let
Brooke Lynn have it!
RITA: Thank you!
BROOKE LYNN: See you
on the runway, girl.
JIMBO: Oh, you in danger, bitch!
BROOKE LYNN: La bibliotheque
is now closed,
which means you're loitering.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Run along,
darling, run along.
It's always so sad
to watch him go.
LEMON: Not that sad.
BROOKE LYNN: Alright,
you shady, shady beavers,
the winner of this week's
mini challenge
is
Lemon.
[applause]
LEMON: Yeah!
you.
BROOKE LYNN: You have won
a $1,000 gift certificate
from LAG Concepts
for divine drag jewels.
LEMON: Work!
I'm gagging.
BROOKE LYNN: You know,
they say imitation
is the sincerest
form of flattery.
That's right.
For this week's maxi challenge,
we are playing
the one, the only
Snatch Game.
[cheering & applause]
ILONA: This is the first
Snatch Game ever in Canada.
How iconic.
BROOKE LYNN: Each of you
must impersonate a celebrity
and do your very best
to make us
blank our blanking blanks off.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: #CanadasDragRace.
Gentlemen, start your engines,
and may the best woman win.
[laughter & applause]
LEMON: Snatch Game
is very important
in this competition because
it separates the dumb bitches
from the really clever girls.
LEMON: Did you
grow up doing improv?
PRIYANKA: I did.
It's been a while
since I have done improv,
but I feel like drag
is improv, so
LEMON: It is.
PRIYANKA: I'm excited.
PRIYANKA: Improv
challenges are my jam.
I worked in kids TV
for eight years.
Working in kids TV taught me how
to play different characters,
and just how to like own
everything I'm doing.
JIMBO: Why are you
glittering that head up?
PRIYANKA: I'm making
it into a crystal ball.
JIMBO: What are you being?
PRIYANKA: I'm gonna
be Miss Cleo.
JIMBO: Oh, Cleo never lie!
PRIYANKA: Miss Cleo never lies.
Call me now.
PRIYANKA: Miss Cleo,
the famous TV psychic.
She's West Indian.
I can play into that.
PRIYANKA: $199 for
our psychic reading.
PRIYANKA: Snatch Game
you need to be really,
really big or you
literally can go home.
PRIYANKA: This!
PRIYANKA: I think
I'm gonna be okay.
PRIYANKA: I look like
Will Smith in Aladin.
PRIYANKA: Call me now.
JEFFREY: Bonjour, babies!
LEMON: Hi-eee.
JEFFREY: I'm here to see
who can tickle my funny bone
with their she-larious snatch.
[laughter]
LEMON: Yes!
JEFFREY: Hi, Kiara.
KIARA: Hi, Jeffrey.
JEFFREY: How are we?
KIARA: I'm good, I'm excited.
JEFFREY: Snatch Game
is my favourite game
of the year, honey!
KIARA: Yeah, me too.
JEFFREY: It's
Snatch Game season.
KIARA: Yes.
JEFFREY: Speaking of which
What season is this?
KIARA: It's Christmas.
JEFFREY: [gasps]
Mariah!
KIARA: Of course, yeah.
Gonna get some champagne.
Gonna get some good boobies.
JEFFREY: I like
where this is going!
KIARA: I do her in my show
sometimes and, you know,
people really enjoy it.
JEFFREY: It's about
staying in character,
thinking like the character
KIARA: Yes.
JEFFREY: and making us laugh.
KIARA: Yeah, for sure.
JEFFREY: Don't let
Mariah down, honey.
KIARA: I won't, baby.
JEFFREY: Thanks, Kiara.
Can't wait to see it.
KIARA: Thank you.
JEFFREY: I can't even begin
to imagine who this is.
ILONA: Right, there's
a lot happening here.
JEFFREY: Give me a hint.
ILONA: I'm getting ready to
source out .
JEFFREY: [gasps]
ILONA: Giving you
a little Rebecca More.
JEFFREY: So exciting!
ILONA: Yeah!
ILONA: Rebecca More
is an iconic porn star,
otherwise known as
the Destroyer.
Hello.
JEFFREY: Okay, so what are you
gonna do to bring Rebecca
to life and make me laugh?
ILONA: So I think being Rebecca
is just that over the top
personality, which is,
I think, something I need
to channel across anyways.
JEFFREY: Yes, girl.
ILONA: So I think this is gonna
be the perfect character
for me to do
to get that across.
JEFFREY: Do not fade
into the background.
This is your time to shine.
Destroy, bitch.
ILONA: I'm gonna destroy.
I'm gonna destroy.
JEFFREY: See you soon.
Bye-ee.
ILONA: Bye.
JEFFREY: Jimbo,
I can't think for a second
who you could possibly be doing.
JIMBO: [Joan Rivers]
Oh, oh, can we tawk, Jeffrey?
JEFFREY: Oh, you are giving me
Joan Rivers right now.
JIMBO: You got it, girl!
JIMBO: Joan Rivers is an icon
in the gay community,
in the comedians' community,
so I have some
really big shoes to fill.
I need to make sure
that my portrayal of her
lives up to her legendary name.
JEFFREY: I cannot wait to see
what you bring us
with Miss Joan Rivers.
But you also haven't
gotten a win yet.
JIMBO: Okay.
JEFFREY: We know that you can
deliver when it comes to looks.
We know that you can deliver
when it comes to personality.
This is your time
to shine, okay?
This is Snatch Game, girl.
You have made it, now bring it.
JIMBO: Thank you.
JEFFREY: Thanks, Jimbo.
JIMBO: Thank you, Jeffrey.
JEFFREY: Bye.
JIMBO: Bye.
JIMBO: I'm gonna bring
everything I have
to the Snatch Game.
I really want to be seen
as a fierce competitor,
and ready to win.
PRIYANKA: Hi, Jeffrey.
JEFFREY: Hi.
Girl, who are we doing?
PRIYANKA: I'm gonna
be Miss Cleo.
JEFFREY: Exciting.
PRIYANKA: I'm very excited.
JEFFREY: Okay, so you've
got the look down.
How are you gonna make
us laugh as Miss Cleo?
PRIYANKA: I did a lot of improv.
I just have to really like
listen to what's going on.
JEFFREY: You really stood out
in the acting challenge,
so we know that you
can bring the comedy.
We know that you can deliver.
PRIYANKA: Yes.
JEFFREY: So I'm looking forward
to seeing what you're
gonna bring with Miss Cleo.
PRIYANKA: My talk with
Jeffrey is going pretty well.
Jeffrey has full
confidence in me.
JEFFREY: Did you come to win,
or did you come to play?
PRIYANKA: I came to win.
Ha!
JEFFREY: I can't
wait to see you win.
Thanks, Priyanka.
PRIYANKA: Thank you, Jeffrey.
JEFFREY: Goodbye-ee.
PRIYANKA: Bye-ee.
PRIYANKA: I have potential to be
funny, and I'm good at acting,
so don't worry.
Miss Cleo will come to life.
I promise.
PRIYANKA: [laughs]
JEFFREY: What's all this?
SCARLETT: Hello.
How are you?
JEFFREY: You have
a lot going on here.
SCARLETT: I've got
it down to two.
JEFFREY: Oh, we
have options here.
SCARLETT: Yeah,
so I have my Liza.
JEFFREY: I love a good Liza.
SCARLETT: And
I have Fran Drescher,
which is my new one.
JEFFREY: Okay, so give me
some of what you've got.
Give me a little bit
of Fran Drescher.
SCARLETT: [Fran Drescher]
Oh, Mr. Jeffrey, ha-ha!
How you doing today?
A-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!
SCARLETT: I'm like,
"Oh my god."
He's looking at me like
JEFFREY: Switch it up.
Give me a little bit
of Liza, darling.
SCARLETT: [Liza Minelli]
Well, it's ' Liza.
I mean, look at this.
I've got two hairs.
I've got two wigs.
I've got some shoes
and an outfit.
It's Liza!
JEFFREY: [laughs]
SCARLETT: It's Liza Minelli,
you know?
How can you go wrong with Liza?
JEFFREY: Amazing.
Okay, so you've
done Liza before.
SCARLETT: Yeah.
JEFFREY: Ask yourself, is this
the time to take a risk,
or is this the time
to play it safe?
Because you have been safe
in this competition
again and again and again.
SCARLETT: Yeah.
JEFFREY: I'll just
leave you with that.
SCARLETT: Thanks, honey.
JEFFREY: Bye!
SCARLETT: I'm happy that
I made it to Snatch Game,
but I just don't know
who I'm gonna pick.
SCARLETT: [Drescher]
Mrs. Sheffield.
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha.
♪
JEFFREY: Rita Baga, so what
have we got going on here?
RITA: She's the most
well-known French singer.
JEFFREY: Edith Piaf.
RITA: Yes.
JEFFREY: Um, she's got
so much to work with.
RITA: I choose Edith Piaf.
I don't think it has
ever been done before,
a French character on the
Snatch Game and, you know,
she likes to be memorable.
RITA: People know her mostly
because she was a drug addict.
JEFFREY: Yes.
RITA: She was really miserable,
so it's easy to play with that.
But when she first started her
career, she was really sassy.
I'm gonna play with that.
JEFFREY: No one's done
her on Snatch Game.
RITA: I'm excited but
I'm nervous at the same time.
JEFFREY: Let's see what
you've got, Miss Rita Baga.
I can't wait.
Make us laugh.
RITA: I will.
JEFFREY: Bye.
RITA: It's a promise.
JEFFREY: What have
we got going on here?
BOA: So, we have
some Cyndi Lauper.
JEFFREY: Uh-huh.
BOA: Rebel Wilson.
JEFFREY: Who else?
BOA: Gypsy Rose Blanchard.
JEFFREY: The girl
who had fake cancer?
BOA: Yes.
JEFFREY: Okay, okay.
BOA: I really want to do it but
I don't want to be offensive,
so I feel like I'm playing
on a fine line here.
JEFFREY: Okay.
I want to hear a little bit
of what you've got
for Cyndi Lauper's voice.
BOA: [Cyndi Lauper] Very
like New Yawk and cute,
and she's got a little something
in her throat, you know?
JEFFREY: I don't know
if I do know.
BOA: Jeffrey's looking at me
like, "You better don't, girl!"
BOA: [Lauper]
A little higher, maybe?
Something like that?
Is that a little bit better?
JEFFREY: Okay
I want to hear what you've got
for Rebel Wilson.
BOA: So excited to
be here, Jeffrey,
and she can do like a dab.
She does a dab.
Maybe she could have like
a tattoo or something.
And she's just stupid,
like I could just like
JEFFREY: Don't think
too much about it,
but listen to what
you're saying, okay?
You've got a lot of
work ahead of you.
I can't wait to see
what you pull together.
You've got this.
Peace.
BOA: Take care.
I love you.
JEFFREY: Bye-ee!
BOA: [sputters]
JEFFREY: Hi, Lemon.
LEMON: How are you?
JEFFREY: So what have
we got going on here?
LEMON: I've decided
to do JoJo Siwa
who is from Dance Moms.
JEFFREY: Okay.
LEMON: And now she is
a kind of child star.
She's a very loud personality.
LEMON: JoJo has so many
funny qualities about her.
She talks superfast.
She asks questions and then
answers them immediately.
She can't pronounce her Rs,
so I think there's a lot
of material that
I can work with.
JEFFREY: Let's talk
about the critiques.
How are you feeling
about everything?
LEMON: I'm feeling puzzlement.
I'm a little bit confused
because I'm working my butt off,
and it's feeling like
I'm not doing enough.
JEFFREY: Hm.
LEMON: And drag
is my everything.
Like, I thought for a long time
that dance was the only thing
that made me happy,
and then I found this,
and it just changed my world.
JEFFREY: You're really
feeling this right now, huh?
LEMON: Yeah, I want to
prove to you guys that
this matters so much to me,
and I want to be
Canada's next drag superstar,
and I want to show you guys
that I have everything
it takes to do that.
JEFFREY: I cannot wait to see
what you bring to Snatch Game.
Make us laugh.
LEMON: I can't either.
JEFFREY: Bye.
LEMON: After being
called a coaster,
I know that I have
to take a huge risk,
and Snatch Game
is the perfect place to do that
because if I'm gonna lose,
I'm gonna lose big.
♪
JEFFREY: Ladies, I'm going to
leave you to get into your faces
and out of your heads.
And tomorrow,
on the main stage,
category is "Night of
a Thousand Celines."
[applause & laughter]
JEFFREY: And on the runway,
we'll be joined by our
extra special guest host,
iconic funny woman,
Mary Walsh.
[applause & laughter]
ILONA: Oh my god!
JIMBO: I have watched her
since I was a little boy.
Mary Walsh is hilarious.
JEFFREY: Bye, girls.
QUEENS: Bye-ee.
JEFFREY: Make us laugh.
LEMON: [laughs] Oh, .
SCARLETT: Snatch Game,
you've gotta serve or go home.
SCARLETT: [Minnelli]
It's Liza!
It's Liza!
Oh my god.
♪
ILONA: Oh!
TRACI: Hi, I'm Traci Melchor.
We are live on the red carpet
with SheTalk at the Snatch Game.
♪
TRACI: All the stars are
out for this premiere.
BOA: [Gypsy Rose]
I'm so excited to be here.
TRACI: Are you gonna play
by the rules tonight?
SCARLETT: [Minelli]
I make the rules, honey.
I'm Liza!
I'm ' Liza!
TRACI: It's the gayest
night of the year!
RITA: [Edith Piaf]
Let's have a ménage a trois?
TRACI: Since last week
ILONA: [Rebecca More] Lately
I've been just trying to be
a pretty good girl.
PRIYANKA: [Miss Cleo]
The odds are in my favour
for the low price of 3.99.
You got some money in there?
TRACI: So let's tuck in,
and get ready for some
snatch-worthy appearances.
BOA: There we go.
We're good, we're good.
Oh, no!
JIMBO: [Rivers] I haven't
been flashed this much
since Central Park.
♪
BROOKE LYNN: Welcome to Canada's
newest game show sensation,
the Snatch Game.
BROOKE LYNN: I am your host,
Brooke Lynn Hytes,
living proof that if
you bomb this show,
they make you
come back and host it.
Joining us today is Scottish-
born interior design duo,
Colin and Justin.
JUSTIN: Hey, Brookers!
BROOKE LYNN: Oh, hi.
How are ya?
JUSTIN: We're always
good when you're nearby.
BROOKE LYNN: Now, you boys
have been in Canada
for over a decade now.
What do you love so much
about living here?
COLIN: It's a lifestyle.
It's about getting
close to nature.
It's about wearing plaid.
BROOKE LYNN: What
about our wildlife?
JUSTIN: We've seen a few
bears in our travels.
COLIN: And there's
a lot of beaver
in this room this evening.
JUSTIN: [laughs]
Yes, there is.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Let's meet
our celebrities.
First up, ripped from
the headlines, and her IV,
it's Gypsy Rose Blanchard!
BOA: Hi, how are you?
BROOKE LYNN: Hi, Gypsy.
How you feeling?
BOA: I'm excited, so excited
I could just kill my mother!
♪
BROOKE LYNN: And look who it is!
None other than Joan Rivers!
JIMBO: Oh, Brooke Lynn,
I'm wondering what the hell
I did for my life
to end up in the bottom
of the waste basket
with these hairballs!
Oh, and I also brought Edgar.
I don't go anywhere
without Edgar's ashes.
Oh!
COLIN: [laughs]
BROOKE LYNN: Oh my goodness.
And look, from Dance Moms,
online sensation,
it is JoJo Siwa!
LEMON: Hey, how's it goin'?
I'm so excited to be here.
This is the best day
of my whole life!
Just legit the best day ever!
I am so excited to be here
at the Snatch Game.
I'm so excited to live my truth.
BROOKE LYNN: And what
truth would that be?
LEMON: That I can't
pronounce my Rs.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Thank you.
LEMON: Thank you, Brooke Lynn!
BROOKE LYNN: And it is
everybody's favourite
TV psychic, Miss Cleo.
PRIYANKA: Call me now!
BROOKE LYNN: Miss Cleo, can
you tell me what I'm thinking
right now?
PRIYANKA: Hm, you're
thinking about
some snatch for taste later.
BROOKE LYNN: What
does that mean?
PRIYANKA: It means
you suck a pom-pom.
BROOKE LYNN: What's a pom-pom?
PRIYANKA: Look under
the dance belt.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh, got it.
Ha-ha-ha-ha.
And oh my stars,
legendary French chanteuse,
Edith Piaf!
RITA: Thank you.
Thank you so much.
BROOKE LYNN: You look
a little hunched over.
RITA: Oh, just a little bit.
I've been sleeping, you know?
BROOKE LYNN: For
how many years now?
RITA: Oh, too much, my baby.
BROOKE LYNN: Now, you know
you can't smoke in here, right?
RITA: Okay.
♪
BROOKE LYNN: And next to Edith,
it's singer, actor,
Judy's daughter,
it's Liza with a zed.
SCARLETT: It's Liza.
She's here.
Hello, hello, hello!
How are you, Brooke?
What'd going on?
BROOKE LYNN: I'm great.
You know, I would love to
see you and JoJo in a fight.
SCARLETT: Oh god, well,
if she keeps it up,
we're gonna have one,
honey, because she needs
a Ritalin,
and I need a goddamn nap,
after I heard that one go on.
LEMON: It would be one
hell of a dance battle.
SCARLETT: Here she goes!
Here she goes!
Okay.
These kids don't know
talent if it hit them.
BROOKE LYNN: Up next,
it's Miss Mariah Carey.
KIARA: Hi, Brooke.
BROOKE LYNN: How are you?
KIARA: I'm good.
I'm good.
Just feels like Christmas.
I'm very excited.
BROOKE LYNN: How are the twins?
KIARA: The twins
are really great.
BROOKE LYNN: And your kids?
Okay, alright.
Well, it's good
to have you here.
KIARA: Hi, guys.
BROOKE LYNN: Look who it is,
porn star, Rebecca More.
ILONA: Yes, I'm a
destroyer.
BROOKE LYNN: Is this your
first time on a game show?
ILONA: You know,
Brooke Lynn, yes.
It is.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: I love a quick,
short, concise answer.
COLIN: Where's Anne Murray?
BROOKE LYNN: Alright,
let's play the Snatch Game!
ILONA: ' love snatch.
BROOKE LYNN: Let's get
to our first question.
Here it is.
Colin, dumb Debra is so dumb,
instead of gravy,
she puts blank on her poutine.
♪
COLIN: She puts
custard on her poutine.
JUSTIN: Custard?
BROOKE LYNN: Custard?
COLIN: Yeah, 'cause she's dumb
and it's not gravy.
BROOKE LYNN: Custard.
Let's see if we have a match.
Let's go to Liza.
Dumb Debra is so dumb,
she puts what on her poutine?
SCARLETT: I put liquor.
BROOKE LYNN: Liquor.
SCARLETT: Because if there's
one thing my mother taught me,
it's how to take a drink
and a bottle of pills
in the same swig.
KIARA: Scarlett's doing
a good job on Liza Minnelli.
For a character she
pulled off like last minute,
like she's doing great.
SCARLETT: Rest in peace, Judy.
BROOKE LYNN: You never
stood a chance, did you?
SCARLETT: I never did.
But look at me now!
I'm ' Liza!
BROOKE LYNN: Miss Cleo.
PRIYANKA: Me know Debra.
BROOKE LYNN: Uh-huh.
PRIYANKA: And she put bleach
because she's so dutty,
she wants to clean
she inside out.
She dumb.
She stupid.
BROOKE LYNN: Well,
because you're psychic,
I expected you would
make a match with Colin.
PRIYANKA: Hm.
Oops.
BROOKE LYNN: Okay.
RITA: Priyanka,
are you sleeping?
What's happening?
Well, I'm not sure
about this Miss Cleo.
BROOKE LYNN: Alright, up next,
let's go to JoJo Siwa.
LEMON: Well, you know,
I don't know Debra,
but I don't like to bully people
'cause I get bullied a lot,
so I just wrote
maybe it's your hair
that keeps falling out--
uh, "haiw."
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: That
is pronounced haiw.
COLIN: Haiw.
LEMON: Yeah, I put hair
on everything I eat,
even if it's not on purpose.
SCARLETT: Did anybody
understand any of that?
Did anybody understand
any of that? [laughter]
ILONA: She needs
a translator.
BROOKE LYNN: Alright,
Joan Rivers.
JIMBO: Okay, let's do it.
BROOKE LYNN: What was
Dumb Debra put on her poutine?
JIMBO: I said ashes.
I like ashes everywhere,
in the morning on my breakfast.
Oh, I'll sprinkle it
on the answer.
[laughter]
JIMBO: Just one second.
Oh, oh gawd.
[laughter]
JIMBO: Just a bit of ashes.
BROOKE LYNN: Next
question, here it is.
Justin.
JUSTIN: Brooke Lynn.
BROOKE LYNN: Jeffrey
Bowyer-Chapman is such a babe,
his fans are always
sending him blank.
Justin?
JUSTIN: Diapers!
BROOKE LYNN: Okay.
Let's start with
Gypsy Rose Blanchard.
BOA: I said money!
JUSTIN: Oh!
BOA: My fans send me money
for my health and stuff,
but we're in Canada, so I just
spend it on computers, wigs,
costumes, and other things
just to impress the boys.
JIMBO: You should use some
of that money to fix that face.
Jesus Christ, that's a face
only a mother could love.
BOA: I will stab you, bitch.
JIMBO: Oh, Christ.
I would love to be murdered
beside this dumb bitch.
LEMON: Yo, wassup?
BROOKE LYNN: Just
out of curiosity,
how did you kill your mother?
BOA: Well
JIMBO: She ate her!
Look at this fat bitch.
[laughter]
[sound of something dropping]
JIMBO: Oh gawd, I'm sorry.
That was my vagina.
ILONA: Jimbo as Joan Rivers,
oh my gosh, Jimbo's killing it.
I almost break
character laughing.
BOA: You okay?
JIMBO: Oh gawd, it's just
my vagina, it drops.
ILONA: Oh, Jimbo did so good.
BROOKE LYNN: Alright, up next.
Edith Piaf.
RITA: I don't have any answer
but I might sing a song for you.
BROOKE LYNN: Absolutely.
JUSTIN: I would love a song.
JIMBO: Here we go.
Kill me now.
RITA: Now
This will be my final act.
Thank you.
[laughter]
JUSTIN: Impressive stuff.
BROOKE LYNN: That
was so beautiful.
RITA: I'm feeling very sleepy.
BROOKE LYNN: Okay.
RITA: These bitches are boring.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Mimi,
what do Jeffrey Bowyer-Chapman's
fans send him?
KIARA: I would love
to get Christmas presents
all year long, honey.
SCARLETT: Oh god,
here we go again.
KIARA: Mm-hm.
Did you buy my new album?
BROOKE LYNN: No.
What's it called?
KIARA: It's called "Honey,
This is Christmas, Baby."
SCARLETT: Oh, god.
BROOKE LYNN: It's called
Honey, apostrophe,
This is Christmas, Baby?
KIARA: Oh yes, honey.
LEMON: Kiara's Mimi is
not quite it.
BROOKE LYNN: I'll be sure
to look for it at Wal-Mart.
KIARA: Thank you.
LEMON: You need a punchline.
You can't just say
a bunch of sentences.
BROOKE LYNN: Up next,
we have Rebecca More.
ILONA: I'm trying to
keep a little bit PG,
so I can get a little bit
more family-friendly gigs.
BROOKE LYNN: Mm-hm.
ILONA: So I said "chicken pics."
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Instead
of "dick pics."
ILONA: Chicken pics.
BROOKE LYNN: Or we could say
" pics" even, maybe?
ILONA: You like ,
Brooke Lynn?
BROOKE LYNN: Could you
do me a favour and spell out
how you pronounce ?
Because I'm very curious to
see what that looks like.
ILONA: C
Ock.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Alright, Joan.
JIMBO: I just wrote "help".
Melissa, if you're
watching this,
get me the hell out of here.
I keep clicking my goddamn
heels together like Judy.
SCARLETT: Don't you talk
about my mother like that!
JIMBO: Your mother and I
invented the Snatch Game, okay?
You miss your mother?
Smell my goddamn fingers.
[laughter]
SCARLETT: Get your
fingers out of my face!
ILONA: I'll '
smell your fingers, yeah.
JIMBO: Oh my god!
BROOKE LYNN: We really
should move on, ladies.
JIMBO: Someone have
my finger removed.
BROOKE LYNN: Alright, enough.
You are all wrong.
ILONA: You
' like that?
BROOKE LYNN: Okay,
Colin, it's back to you.
Freaky Franny is so freaky,
when she pole dances,
she uses a blank.
COLIN: A hockey stick.
JUSTIN: Yes!
BROOKE LYNN: JoJo,
I'm sure you have an answer.
LEMON: I sure do got an answer.
The way I pole dance,
which I love to dance,
I always do it on a Pixie Stick
filled with cocaine.
[laughter]
RITA: I would like to have some.
LEMON: Thanks, Joan.
I'm having the best time
ever here at the Snatch Game.
How are you feeling?
'Cause I'm feeling really good.
This is great!
'Ey!
SCARLETT: Someone get that
child an Adderall or something.
BROOKE LYNN: Up next,
Mariah Carey.
KIARA: As artists,
it's important to remember
that we always dance
with our emotions.
BROOKE LYNN: So, what
is your answer, Mimi?
KIARA: Emotions.
BROOKE LYNN: Emotions.
Okay, thank you.
Liza?
SCARLETT: Well, I don't know
much about dancing on poles,
so I just put "new wig"
because when you're tired
of your shitty old one,
just throw on a new one,
and you'll be good to go!
[laughter]
SCARLETT: Good to go,
darling, good to go!
BROOKE LYNN: Edith, my dear,
what did you write down?
RITA: So I just
write down "magic."
You know, just like these pills,
it's magical. [snoring]
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Edith,
Edith, wake up.
RITA: Where the are we?
[laughter]
LEMON: Rita is so in character,
and I am living for Edith Piaf.
SCARLETT: Tell her
to go back to bed.
BROOKE LYNN: I'm sorry,
but that's not a match.
[Rita snoring]
BROOKE LYNN: Alright,
this may be a huge mistake,
but I have one more question.
Colin, the surgeon said,
"This queen I'm operating on
"must be a magician.
"When I reached in to pull out
her appendix, I got a blank."
COLIN: A white rabbit.
[laughter]
PRIYANKA: I'm sitting
there looking around,
being like, "Oh,
all these girls are gonna
"come with funny answers.
What am I gonna do?"
BROOKE LYNN: Let's see
how many matches you got.
Okay, celebrities.
Miss Cleo.
SCARLETT: Oh, god.
PRIYANKA: Listen, Miss Cleo
knows all and she sees all.
BROOKE LYNN: Mm-hm,
except for everything.
[laughter]
PRIYANKA: I said
"a bottle of rum,"
because them queens
love to drink.
♪
SCARLETT: Can someone
get me a drink, please?
PRIYANKA: I'm so bad,
oh my god!
BROOKE LYNN: Oh, no match.
Um, Edith?
Instead of an appendix,
what did the surgeon pull out?
RITA: I just wrote "coffin."
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: He pulled a coffin?
RITA: Can you please
bring me my coffin back?
I am tired of this shit show.
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: Unfortunately,
not a match,
but we will get working
on that coffin for you.
[laughter]
KIARA: A bottle of champagne
because I need a drink.
ILONA: Share that drink.
KIARA: I don't want to share it.
I want one.
SCARLETT: I think we lost one.
BROOKE LYNN: And that is all
the time we have for today!
And the winner of
the Snatch Game is
the town of Dildo,
Newfoundland!
JIMBO: Oh, gawd.
BROOKE LYNN: Colin and Justin,
thanks so much for playing,
and we will see you next
time on the Snatch Game.
♪
♪
♪
BOA: Ooh, we're here!
SCARLETT: We're here
to make it clear.
BOA: So ladies, we are the first
ever queens to do Snatch Game
on Canada's Drag Race!
[all cheering]
SCARLETT: I feel like
that was an iconic
Canadian her-story moment.
PRIYANKA: I feel like I made
history with the worst
Canadian Snatch Game ever!
ILONA: Priyanka, can you
stop playing the victim?
[oohing & laughter]
SCARLETT: How are you feeling?
Are you feeling
a little nervous?
KIARA: I'm good with improv
when I make my own characters
and when I feel some freedom.
But I feel like, with Mariah,
I had to like really stick to it
and didn't know how
to get out of it,
and how to make people laugh.
KIARA: I regret that I didn't do
a good job at the Snatch Game,
so I'm gonna do my best
on the runway,
and do my best to
stay in the competition.
KIARA: Yeah.
SCARLETT: So guys,
I'm so excited
it's Night of
a Thousand Celines!
[all cheering]
SCARLETT: Let's do it!
♪
♪
ILONA: I hope I make
Celine Dion proud.
SCARLETT: We better.
[laughter]
LEMON: So Jimbo, how do you feel
like you did in Snatch Game?
JIMBO: I had so much fun.
LEMON: I thought
you were so good.
JIMBO: Doing that
is my favourite thing.
JIMBO: I love when people laugh,
and I love making people laugh.
JIMBO: It was funny to see like
the key to Brooke Lynn's humour.
You know when you hear that
sound that's like inescapable.
LEMON: Yeah.
JIMBO: My childhood
was really chaotic.
When I was in school,
I was judged so much
about being gay or feminine.
I was very awkward.
I had no friends.
I wore different
clothes than other people.
I was interested in different
things than other people
and I didn't really fit in.
But in grade 10,
I was on the bus,
I made a joke,
and everyone laughed.
Being myself in that moment
paid off, and from that moment,
I started to just rely on
my sense of humour
and to be more myself,
and I was able to make friends.
It's a really powerful
message to show people that
you can be stepped on
but you can rise up.
PRIYANKA: Kiara?
KIARA: Yes?
PRIYANKA: Does your dad
know you do drag?
KIARA: My stepdad, yeah.
PRIYANKA: Okay.
What about your?
KIARA: My biological dad,
like my parents
separated when I was three.
I was not really close with him.
PRIYANKA: Okay.
KIARA: Like he wanted me to,
you know, have like a--
like a
PRIYANKA: Man job?
KIARA: Yeah, a man job
or whatever,
and I never felt like that.
You know, I always wanted
to have like his approval,
in a way,
but I never really like
PRIYANKA: Got it?
KIARA: got it.
KIARA: I feel like
everybody wants approval
from their parents.
It's just natural, I think.
KIARA: If I'm
successful at what I do,
I feel like he will be happy.
KIARA: Drag is an art,
like any other,
so I just hope that he sees it
as not just like a hobby
but really like
a passion and a career.
BOA: I'm gonna make
Celine so proud.
Are you guys?
[all cheering]
SCARLETT: Oh, yeah.
This is the one runway
that none of us can up
because we're Canadian.
LEMON: And Brooke Lynn
did it already.
[laughter]
♪
♪
♪
Covergirl,
put the bass in your walk ♪
Head to toe
Let your whole body talk
JEFFREY: Oh, she's going
that way. [laughs]
And what?
[applause]
MARY: Welcome to the main stage
of Canada's Drag Race.
I'm Mary Walsh,
and I am over the moon thrilled
to be the extra
special guest host.
[applause]
MARY: Stacey McKenzie,
there you are.
Jeffrey Bowyer-Chapman,
you are so cute.
Miss Brooke Lynn Hytes,
have you ever tasted cod tongue?
BROOKE LYNN: [laughs]
I'm sorry.
I don't speak
East Coast lesbian.
[laughter]
MARY: This week, the queens
were challenged to give us
their best celebrity
impressions in Canada's
very first Snatch Game.
And tonight, on the runway,
category is "Night of
a Thousand Celines."
Gentlemen, start your engines,
and may the best woman win!
♪
MARY: First up, Boa.
BROOKE LYNN: Fringe, fringe,
fringe across the board.
BOA: This look is inspired
by Celine at the Met Gala.
I am serving car wash
realness in this gorgeous
feather headpiece,
and this almost
floor-length fringe.
Do you need a wash?
Full service, honey.
JEFFREY: No headdress
for the wicked.
MARY: Shave your armpits.
[laughter]
MARY: Next up, Scarlett BoBo.
STACEY: Poof, there it is.
BROOKE LYNN: Satin-her?
I don't even know her.
SCARLETT: I'm honouring Celine
Dion with my Paris Fashion Week
bedtime eleganza.
JEFFREY: Oh, it's so
hard to get out of bed.
BROOKE LYNN: Just
take it with you.
SCARLETT: I'm serving you soft
face, this cute little bun,
this elegant,
off-the-shoulder dress.
I'm like, "Oh, look at
my glittery collarbones."
MARY: Kiara.
JEFFREY: Ruffles
all dressed, bitch.
STACEY: A new gay has come.
KIARA: Tonight, the fantasy is
Celine album release realness.
I am serving legs on the runway.
I'm serving ruffles.
I'm feeling sexy
in this ponytail.
BROOKE LYNN: A French exit.
JUDGES: Au revoir.
STACEY: Sortie.
MARY: Rita Baga.
BROOKE LYNN: I will
sell this house today.
RITA: The inspiration is Celine
before and after the fame.
I'm serving you '80s
ugly realness, and ooh,
a little reveal.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh!
RITA: She's wearing
a black sequin dress.
She looks lovely.
JEFFREY: Her heart
does go on, and on
JEFFREY & MARY: and on.
RITA: She's strutting.
She's walking.
She's goofing all around,
just like the Celine we know.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh,
the duck walk of shame.
I know it well.
MARY: Jimbo.
JEFFREY: Oh!
MARY: Oh!
JIMBO: I am inspired by
Celine Dion Paris Fashion Week.
MARY: Drill sergeant
Celine Dion.
BROOKE LYNN: Drive all night
and drop and give them 20.
JIMBO: I'm sparkling
from head to toe,
showing off my
rhinestone glasses
and my rhinestone shoulders.
I've just escaped from
Celine Dion boot camp,
and I'm here
to serve you fashion.
STACEY: Are those shoulders
the Dion quintuplets?
[laughter]
MARY: Next is Lemon.
LEMON: I am serving you
her 1998 Oscars performance,
where she won an Oscar.
BROOKE LYNN: Queer, far,
wherever you are.
LEMON: I feel gorgeous
in this dress,
and I feel like I am
the heart of the ocean.
Didn't the old lady drop it
in the ocean in the end?
Well, baby, I went down
and got it for you.
MARY: Next up, Ilona Verley.
ILONA: I'm doing Celine Dion
and Elsa Schiaparelli, 2017.
I want to show the judges that
I can walk in an actual heel.
I'm giving you
"find the life alert
'cause I'm about to drop dead
in these shoes."
BROOKE LYNN: My EKG machine
just says "slut."
ILONA: She's rhinestoned.
She's glistening.
She's letting
the judges have it.
MARY: Is she wearing
a life jacket on her bottom?
MARY: And Priyanka.
BROOKE LYNN: Oh,
here comes the bride.
MARY: Oh!
PRIYANKA: Look at
this wedding dress!
It is the exact replica
of the one she wore.
STACEY: She's father
and the bride.
PRIYANKA: And shablam,
there's another dress
under the wedding dress!
I am serving her
icon award dress.
Thank you so much.
Thank you and goodnight.
♪
MARY: Well, welcome, ladies.
STACEY: Based on your
performance in the Snatch Game,
and your runway presentation,
we've made some decisions.
When I call your name,
please step forward.
Ilona Verley
Scarlett BoBo
You are both safe.
You may leave the stage
and head back to the workroom.
♪
STACEY: Ladies, you represent
the tops and the bottoms
of this week.
♪
MARY: It's now time
for the judges' critiques.
STACEY: First up, Boa.
Brooke Lynn, what did
you think of her performance
on Snatch Game?
BROOKE LYNN: It wasn't as good
as I wanted you to be.
BOA: Okay.
BROOKE LYNN: With the makeup,
I would have loved you
to have gone sicker with it,
more red under the eyes.
As for this look,
there's way too much fringe.
I completely lose
your shape in this.
STACEY: Jeffrey.
JEFFREY: So in your Snatch Game,
I felt like you were
a little bit scared of
making fun of her.
BOA: I didn't want to
get like too crazy.
I should have just
went full force.
I could have gave you
the craziest act I've ever done,
and I held back.
JEFFREY: You certainly did.
This look tonight, I can see
that you were padded
and you were cinched,
but we can't see any of that.
STACEY: In your Snatch Game,
you were holding back.
BOA: Well
STACEY: And I knew
you had it in you
to just like let
loose and let go.
Don't be afraid to do that.
BOA: Yeah.
STACEY: Jeffrey, what
did you think of Kiara?
JEFFREY: You seemed so confident
in your choice of Mariah Carey.
KIARA: Yeah.
JEFFREY: And then, when you
had to deliver as Mariah Carey,
where did she go?
KIARA: She went
Mariah Scary, honey.
She, uh, I don't
know where she went.
I got stuck.
BROOKE LYNN: Mariah Carey
is an extremely hard person
to make funny and it didn't
work for you, unfortunately.
On the runway,
you look gorgeous.
The outfit is gorgeous.
I love it.
It's simplistic,
but you have to be so careful
when you do a ponytail wig.
It doesn't look great.
MARY: Well, I have to
disagree about the hair.
I really liked the hair.
KIARA: Thank you.
MARY: But Mariah Carey,
it's all breasts with me
and Mariah Carey.
You know what I mean?
That's all I ever see.
STACEY: She's always
like sexed out.
Even if you were just
to be like whatever.
You know,
and just be showing titties.
KIARA: Yeah.
STACEY: It would have
given the character more
of a Mariah feel to it.
KIARA: Yeah.
STACEY: Next up, Rita Baga.
MARY: It really interests me
when people do things
that aren't glamourous,
when people do characters.
RITA: Can you please
bring me my coffin back?
I'm tired of this shit show.
BROOKE LYNN: Everyone was
kind of doing this with you,
like, "What is
she gonna do next?"
One of my favourite Snatch Games
I've ever seen ever.
RITA: Oh, thank you.
BROOKE LYNN: Your runway look,
a very odd choice for Celine
looks when there are so many.
MARY: What were you
going for with that walk?
RITA: In Love Can
Move Mountains,
she spent the entire song
doing that, like this.
MARY: Oh!
JEFFREY: Everyone in Quebec
has a crazy French aunt
that's just like Celine Dion,
so I got it.
STACEY: You killed it again.
RITA: Thank you!
STACEY: Great job.
RITA: Merci beaucoup.
STACEY: Next is Jimbo.
MARY: I thought you were
great as Joan Rivers.
JIMBO: Oh!
Oh, gawd!
MARY: You did enough changes
and surprising things
to keep me with you.
I was really very impressed.
Thank you very much.
BROOKE LYNN: Did you have
fun during Snatch Game?
JIMBO: I had
the time of my life.
MARY: Often, that's the secret
to the whole thing, isn't it?
When somebody's
having a good time,
you can't help but go
along with them, right?
STACEY: When it came
to the runway, hello.
You had everybody's mouth
dropped from the time
you walked out
to the time you walked off.
JIMBO: Thank you so much.
STACEY: Big up yourself Jimbo.
BROOKE LYNN: Big up
yourself as well.
[laughter]
MARY: Do what?
STACEY: It's a Jamaican thing.
JEFFREY: It's a
black thing, honey.
It's a black thing.
JIMBO: Yes, thank you.
STACEY: What did you
think about Lemon?
BROOKE LYNN: You
were magnificent.
LEMON: I just wrote maybe it's
her hair that keeps falling out.
Uh, "haiw."
[laughter]
BROOKE LYNN: This is
a Snatch Game
people are going to remember
for a very long time.
JEFFREY: I didn't
know who JoJo was.
I don't care that I didn't
know who JoJo was
because you showed me who she is
and I want more of her.
You were so present.
You paid attention to everything
that everybody was doing.
It was perfect.
However, on the runway tonight,
I was so disappointed
after what you delivered
in Snatch Game.
It's kind of basic.
It's iconic.
I get it.
Titanic, blah, blah, blah.
But I need to see that
personality shine through
on the runway too.
LEMON: Right.
JEFFREY: Remember that.
LEMON: Okay.
MARY: Sometimes, when I'm
dressed up in a completely
ridiculous felt costume with
gold glue around my breasts,
and a plastic sword, and I'm
ambushing the prime minister,
I sometimes feel so stupid
that I decide,
" it, I'm just
gonna go for it anyway."
You did a great job, and you
completely committed to it,
and that's what it
takes, isn't it?
LEMON: Yes.
MARY: But I don't think
anybody could act their way
out of that dress.
It just covers
you up completely.
LEMON: Yes, of course.
MARY: You should give yourself
a chance to shine forth,
not behind navy blue jersey.
BROOKE LYNN: When you're wearing
something that simplistic,
you have to have
more shape to your body.
I would have loved to have seen
a really tiny cinched waist.
LEMON: Yes.
BROOKE LYNN: I would
have loved to see a pad.
And it just would have
elevated it a bit for me.
STACEY: You were
brilliant in Snatch Game.
I didn't know who
JoJo was, at first,
so I ended up Googling,
and I'm like, "This is
the same person."
[laughter]
LEMON: Thank you.
STACEY: Thank you, Lemon.
Priyanka.
BROOKE LYNN: This runway look,
you could have walked out
in either one of those
by themselves,
and I would have
been okay with it.
And then you put them together,
and it was like
MARY: I loved everything
you did on the runway.
The whole look was
fabulous, and then,
for you to do brilliant
Celine moves, brilliant runway.
Thank you very much.
PRIYANKA: Thank you.
JEFFREY: Oh, hi, Priyanka.
PRIYANKA: Oh no,
I've been dreading this.
Hi, Jeffrey!
JEFFREY: Tell me what
I'm thinking right now.
PRIYANKA: It was really bad.
JEFFREY: Your choice
of Miss Cleo,
it was an interesting choice.
PRIYANKA: Call me now!
JEFFREY: There were
so many places to go,
and you didn't go to
any of those places.
BROOKE LYNN: Because
you're psychic,
I expected you would
make a match with Colin.
PRIYANKA: Hm.
Oops.
MARY: You know, sometimes
when you're working with
other people, and they're
doing something amazing,
just repeat the lines
that the funny person said.
[laughter]
Use other people's energy
because that's what
improvisation is about,
and improvisation
is about saying yes.
So, you know, you're
not all alone there,
just trying to create this
character by yourself.
You've got all these
other people that you can
work with and off.
PRIYANKA: I up real bad.
BROOKE LYNN: Yeah.
It was very one-note.
PRIYANKA: Oh!
I'm so embarrassed.
STACEY: Thank you, ladies.
You may untuck in the workroom
while we deliberate.
♪
[snoring]
[piano lullaby]
JIMBO: BoBo and Ilona
are sleeping?
This isn't Romper Room, bitch.
Wake up, girl!
BOA: Boo! [laughter]
JIMBO: Oh my god, you guys
talked yourself to sleep?
[laughter]
SCARLETT: What happened?
What's the T?
ILONA: Who's in the bottom?
Who's lip synching?
SCARLETT: Uh-oh.
ILONA: Who's it gonna be?
KIARA: Okay,
so I'm in the bottom.
They didn't like
my Snatch Game.
They thought I did
not embody Mariah.
SCARLETT: What about you two?
BOA: So they said I held
back with Gypsy Rose.
I picked a character
and I should have gone
all the way with it because
she was just so .
KIARA: I was surprised
for Priyanka's critique.
I feel like you might be safe.
BOA: I think you're safe.
PRIYANKA: I don't know.
I really bombed
the maxi challenge.
LEMON: But they loved your look.
KIARA: So who deserves
to win this week?
SCARLETT: Miss Cleo,
what do you think?
Can you see a vision?
JIMBO: Miss Cleo, tell us,
what's the future?!
LEMON: No, she can't.
Kiki.
KIARA: Yes.
LEMON: How are you feeling now?
KIARA: I feel ready to destroy
anybody who is up against me.
[all groaning]
KIARA: Kiki wanna fight, fight.
PRIYANKA: [slurps]
[burps]
STACEY: Just between
us A-listers
BROOKE LYNN: Don't
you mean C-listers?
JEFFREY: I think
she means D-listers.
MARY: Is this about cup size?
[laughter]
JEFFREY: Something like that.
STACEY: Let's start with Boa.
You know, I was really
disappointed in Boa
in Snatch Game.
You know, I was
expecting to get more.
BROOKE LYNN: She held back,
and Snatch Game is the one place
you cannot hold back.
On the runway, I just lost
her completely in that outfit.
You don't need that much fringe
to get the point
of fringe across.
STACEY: Oh my gosh, Kiara
as Mariah Carey-- ugh.
BROOKE LYNN: I didn't see
any like effort to be Mariah
when she was doing it.
And it was so bizarre because
we know she's such a good actor,
we've seen
in the past challenges.
STACEY: And she just looks
so beautiful, but then,
when she opened her mouth,
it was just like, no.
MARY: I thought she did
great in the runway look.
I love the runway look.
BROOKE LYNN: Well, you're wrong.
MARY: No, I'm not, Brooke Lynn.
[laughter]
I am right.
STACEY: Oh my gosh,
Rita Baga as Edith Piaf.
With her every move,
I wanted to know
what she was gonna do next.
JEFFREY: She paid such
close attention to the nuance
of who this person was.
I was very underwhelmed
by the white ensemble,
when she first came out
on the runway, but thank god,
she pulled that away
and gave us that lack look
because it was really so fun.
STACEY: Loved Jimbo
as Joan Rivers.
Funny, hilarious.
JEFFREY: She was channelling
every ounce of her,
and I was living for it.
MARY: She looked
like Joan Rivers.
She sounded like Joan Rivers.
She just stayed Joan Rivers
the whole time.
BROOKE LYNN: She did not let me
down for a second in that
Snatch Game, nor did she
let me down on that runway.
I really appreciated the way
she elevated that Celine look.
She sequined it
and made it drag.
JEFFREY: Lemon blew
my mind as JoJo.
MARY: She completely
committed to it.
She was really, really good.
STACEY: She was brilliant.
JEFFREY: She just shines when
it comes to acting challenges.
I just really want
to see her do that
when it comes to the runway.
STACEY: Oh my gosh,
Priyanka did Miss Cleo.
I was shocked.
She didn't bring nothing
to that character.
She was just bland.
BROOKE LYNN: It was
so disappointing,
especially because
she has been so on it
this entire competition.
MARY: Priyanka could
have so easily interacted
with all the rest
of the contestants.
Every time somebody
said something,
she could have said, "I knew
she was going to say that."
You know what I mean?
[laughter]
JEFFREY: It was hers to lose
and she lost hard.
STACEY: So, have we made
our final decision?
BROOKE LYNN: I think so.
STACEY: Bring back our Celines.
MARY: Welcome back, my queens.
STACEY: Ladies, based on
your runway presentation,
and Snatch Game,
we've made some decisions.
Jimbo, on the runway,
you served us elevated Celine,
and in the Snatch Game, your
Joan was the right kind of mean.
Rita Baga, the smaller you got,
the bigger we laughed.
Your vie en rose bloomed,
and girl, we died.
Jimbo
Con-drag-ulations.
LEMON: Yay!
[applause]
STACEY: You are the winner
of this week's challenge.
JIMBO: Oh my god, thank you.
Thank you, Joan.
[laughter]
STACEY: You have won a fabulous
7-day Caribbean cruise for two,
courtesy of Pitbull Events.
JIMBO: [wild laughter]
[cheering & applause]
JIMBO: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
JIMBO: I won,
and I am so excited.
This is what
I came here to do.
JIMBO: [Rivers] Oh my gawd,
get it to-goddam-gether.
You're going on
a cruise!
Aah!
Oh my gawd!
STACEY: You may join
the other girls.
JIMBO: Thank you again.
[applause & cheering]
STACEY: Rita Baga
You are safe.
You may leave the stage.
STACEY: Lemon
You are safe.
You may join the other girls.
STACEY: Kiara, all we wanted
for Christmas was good snatch,
and on the runway, all you
delivered was a pretty package.
Boa, as Gypsy Rose,
you should have murdered.
But on the runway,
where did you hide the body?
Priyanka, in the Snatch Game,
your medium sadly crossed over,
which means, Boa
you're safe.
You may join the other girls.
BOA: Thank you.
BOA: Good luck, Kiara.
STACEY: Kiara, Priyanka,
you're up for elimination.
♪
STACEY: Two queens
stand before us.
Prior to tonight,
you were asked to prepare
a lip synch performance
of Celine Dion's
"I Drove All Night."
This is your last chance
to impress us
and save yourself
from elimination.
♪
MARY: The time has come, ladies,
for you to lip synch
for your life.
♪
KIARA: If I want to stay
in this competition,
I have to show that I'm more
than just a pretty package,
and that I'm here for a reason,
and it's to perform.
PRIYANKA: I'm up
for elimination.
I knew this was gonna happen.
All I'm thinking, "Just perform
the song and show the world
"why you make everybody
say your name, Priyanka."
MARY: Good luck, and don't
it up, for 's sake.
♪
♪
Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh-oh
Wa-da-da-da
Oh yeah
[oh yeah, oh yeah] ♪
I had to escape
The city was
sticky and cruel ♪
Maybe I should
have called you first ♪
But I was dying
to get to you ♪
I was dreaming while I drove
The long straight road ahead
Uh-huh
Yeah ♪
Could taste your sweet kisses,
your arms open wide ♪
This fever for you was
just burning me up inside ♪
♪
♪
I drove all night
to get to you ♪
♪
Is that all right?
I drove all night,
crept in your room ♪
♪
Woke you from your sleep
to make love to you ♪
Is that all right?
I drove all night
What in this world
keeps us from falling apart? ♪
♪
No matter where I go
I hear the beating
of our one heart ♪
I think about you when
the night is cold and dark ♪
Uh-huh
Yeah ♪
No one can move me
the way that you do ♪
Nothing erases this feeling
between me and you ♪
♪
I drove all night
to get to you ♪
♪
Is that all right?
I drove all night,
crept in your room ♪
Woke you from your sleep
To make love to you
Is that all right?
I drove all night
♪
♪
I taste your sweet kisses,
your arms open wide ♪
This fever for you was
just burning me up inside ♪
♪
I drove all night
♪
♪
I drove all night
To get to you
JEFFREY: Yes!
[cheering & applause]
JEFFREY: Well done, ladies.
Well done.
[cheering & applause]
♪
♪
♪
STACEY: We have
made our decision.
Priyanka
Chanté, you stay.
[applause]
You may join the others.
♪
♪
STACEY: Kiara,
we expected fierce.
We were surprised
by your funny.
And now your future
is unlimited.
Now, sashay away.
KIARA: Thank you
so much, everybody.
JEFFREY: We love you, honey.
[applause]
KIARA: Love you, guys.
BOA: Love you, Kiki!
QUEEN: Sissies for life, girl!
KIARA: Kiki want to be
on all-stars, okay?
[laughter]
QUEEN: We love you!
KIARA: I'm proud of myself.
I think I could have done
better, especially with Mariah.
If you're watching this,
I'm sorry.
Drag is my life.
It's very important
to me and, you know,
I don't feel like I would
fit anywhere without drag.
I'm really proud to represent
Montreal on this first season
of Canada's Drag Race.
, I didn't win!
But you knew that already.
[chuckles]
♪
STACEY: Con-drag-ulations,
everybody.
And remember, stay true
north strong and fierce.
Now let the music play.
You wear it well
Lipstick,
lipstick painted on ♪
You wear it well
That sure suits
you-ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh ♪
Work it for me
Work it for me, me
You wear it
You wear it
You wear it well
RUPAUL: Next time
on Canada's Drag Race
JEFFREY: You'll be
getting downright judicial
in your very own late-night
law firm commercials.
STACEY: Action.
STACEY: [gasps]
LEMON: I've split my kitty!
SCARLETT & ILONA: [screaming]
ILONA: She literally
whams me with a book.
JIMBO: It's my special day!
[laughter]
STACEY: You're very special.
There's something
special about you.
JEFFREY: Welcome to
the competition, honey.
BROOKE LYNN: I would like to
hear from each and every one
of you which one of your sisters
should go home tonight and why.
LEMON: I'm not here
to make friends anymore.
TOM: I'm just happy to be here.
[laughter]
♪
♪
♪
♪
♪
♪