Dash & Lily (2020) s01e05 Episode Script

1
["Sukiyaki" by Kyu Sakamoto playing]
So my ex-girlfriend is in town.
[singing in Japanese]
She's back for the holidays, and…
She texted me she wants to see me.
I… I don't know what to do.
She broke my heart,
and I feel like I was…
Finally moving on.
I mean, due in large part to the person
who actually brought me here today,
so I don't know.
Well, what do you guys think I should do?
Yeah.
I appreciate the help.
[Lily] It's hard, isn't it?
When you can't rely
on language to give you an answer.
Like when you're trying to make mochi
in a kitchen full of Japanese grannies.
You could ask for help.
Never!
Sorry.
[Lily]
But they wouldn't answer you anyway.
[Dash] Sadist. Just wait until you
see what I have in store for you.
An artsy pop-up
that I know you're gonna love.
[man] Welcome, everyone.
The goal of our pop-up?
To create.
To build…
A manifestation of what's been
occupying your mental space.
[Lily] Crafting? Honestly?
These dares
are supposed to be challenging.
[Dash] Come on, Lil.
What's the secret here?
[Lily] The formation of mochi
takes extreme focus.
I'm a hundred percent focused.
[phone sounding, vibrating]
Well… maybe not a hundred percent.
Make whatever's in your head.
Express yourself.
Be free.
[Dash] Look at that one.
Perfect.
["Sukiyaki" by Kyu Sakamoto playing]
[Lily] Look,
if you don't wanna get tossed,
you need to listen to your mochi.
Listen to my mochi?
[Lily] I know you have
a lot of big, loud ideas in your head
on how things should be,
but if your mind is quiet,
sometimes the best answer to a problem
makes itself heard.
I guess this is me saying,
"Go with the flow."
[chuckles]
[Lily] You cringed, didn't you?
But that's exactly why I sent you here.
Give it a try.
Listen to your mochi.
Listen to my mochi.
[breathing deeply]
[all applauding]
[woman speaking Japanese]
[Dash] Torture but worth it.
You know me well.
[Lily] Thank you kindly.
I was hoping
for something equally challenging,
but you seem to have misjudged me.
This stack of Coke cans represents
how corporatized
reality television ideology
has become the steel grip
on the American throat.
[people murmuring approval]
I made a Muppet.
It's what I think
a friend of mine looks like in real life.
He looks rude.
[Lily] If I could give myself
a high five, I would.
Thanks for a fun challenge, Snarl.
Am I done now?
[Dash] Your dare's not over yet.
All right. Now that we've created,
- it's time to destroy.
- Wait. What?
It's time to free your mind
of the corporeal baggage
you've materialized here.
What's happening now?
- This is the Break Room.
- Right. Break Room.
Where we all take a fun,
creative craft break as a group.
No. Break Room, where you
literally break shit to feel better.
[rock music playing]
[Dash] You told me, when it rains,
you always look for the rainbow.
But sometimes, a rainbow doesn't show.
So what do you do?
You stand in the rain and scream.
[all grunting]
Wrapping presents
While I still got time ♪
I should be singing carols
Should be feeling fine ♪
I've been counting the days… ♪
[Dash] Let it all out,
all those messy, angry, un-Lily feelings.
Instead of hiding behind a smile,
release your negative emotions.
Beat the crap out of something.
I guarantee you will feel amazing.
These should work well.
I've been working my way back to you ♪
Christmas ♪
Your regular session today?
[chuckles]
I'm actually feeling
pretty relaxed today.
Your friend's a really talented artist.
First Muppet we've had here.
Ooh, fantastic. Where's the corpse?
[indistinct chattering]
[Lily] Sorry, Notebook Boy.
I like looking for the rainbows.
Okay. Protein cup for Peanut.
Hey, no. Grain-free for Boris,
and only one at a time
for your digestive system, okay?
Oh, my God!
Hank, I love your pink jacket.
Come here, Hank. Come here.
Good Hank. Good Hank.
Lily Mori-Novak.
Edgar!
[heart beating]
What are you doing here?
Are… are you stalking me?
No. You wouldn't do that, I think.
I mean,
I don't actually know you that well
I looked you up
on Instagram after the show.
You only post dog photos
tagged at this park at 3:00 p.m.,
so I've been coming here every day
at three hoping to run into you.
That is
the literal definition of stalking.
You know,
I assumed you'd have a dog yourself.
It's kind of weird that you don't.
Do you just buy treats
for other people's dogs?
- [chuckles]
- No. I make them.
[chuckles]
That is so weird.
So weird.
[chuckling]
Wait, is that why you came here?
To tell me how weird I am?
'Cause I got it.
Weirdo-Central. Catch ya later.
No, no, wait. No.
I… I felt… I felt bad about
how things went down at the show.
Oh, yes. The punk show,
where you maybe sort of told me
I looked like a freak,
which I probably did,
so it's totally fine.
No, that was a compliment.
- A compliment?
- Yes, man.
Your… your dancing was awesome.
You've always been able
to let go like that, even as a kid.
It always made me so jealous.
You were jealous of me?
I still am.
And now look at you.
You've grown up so damn cute.
You've even got the puppet and everything.
[chuckles]
Do you remember
the last time you talked to me?
Well, it had to be before seventh grade.
That's when I set that fire
and my dad sent me away
to boarding school.
Why? Do you remember?
[heart beating]
- [young Edgar]That girl is so weird.
- [kids laughing]
No.
Hey, what are you doing later?
There's this slam poetry night
around the corner.
A bunch of East Village artists
sticking it to the bourgeoisie.
You should come.
[chuckles] You're going to slam poetry?
I'm trying on my free spirit hat.
Like yours.
It's harder for some of us
when it doesn't come naturally,
but I'm trying.
You're the real deal, Lily.
You always have been.
So get used to it because…
Other people notice.
[chuckles]
["A Very Very Very Merry Christmas"
by Times Square Crooners & Swingers]
I hope this happy holiday will bring ♪
Nothing but the most of everything ♪
[Lily] I couldn't destroy my creation.
But that's okay, because this notebook
is the perfect vessel
to release any emotions, good or bad.
I can tell you anything.
[phone sounds, vibrates]
[sighs]
A very, very, very merry Christmas ♪
[phone sounds, vibrates]
[sighs]
[humming]
[Dash] Dear Lily, I love
that you couldn't destroy your creation.
- [dings]
- You always follow your heart
- [laughing] That's great.
- Whoa!
Dad?
Jesus, Dash. What…
what the hell are you doing here?
What the hell are you doing here?
Hi. I'm Leeza. Nice to meet you.
- So I was thinking
- So
- Um…
- No, go ahead.
Well, no, I was just gonna say,
I thought you were gonna be
in the Alps till New Year's.
Yeah, we got our fill
of Switzerland pretty fast.
Now we're headed over
to Half Moon Bay to sail,
but Leeza wanted to stop by real quick
to do breakfast at Tiffany's.
What is it with women and Audrey Hepburn?
So you weren't gonna tell me
you were here.
Weren't you supposed to be at your mom's?
Well, yeah, I… I am.
I just… I needed a break,
so I'm just hanging here. Hanging out.
You don't have to tell me twice.
Your mother's a pill.
Why don't we grab dinner tonight?
You, me, Leeza.
Second chance for a first impression.
- Great.
- I'll let you put on some decent clothes.
[sighs]
[dad] You might wanna stock up
on food if you're gonna post up here.
- Yeah?
- The only thing in the fridge was mochi.
Oh, no, no, no. Dad
Hey, great news!
Kid's gonna join us for dinner!
[inhales sharply]
[Dash] Lily.
So my dad is in town,
a true Christmas nightmare.
To make it worse,
I'm being strong-armed into dinner.
Seems like every year
brings another awkward meal
with his girlfriend of the week,
culminating in a huge,
explosive war of words with old Daddo,
who spent the entire meal trying
to show off what a good parent he is.
The only thing that's ever helped me
in these eternally fraught dinners
was Sofia…
My ex-girlfriend,
who would effortlessly defuse
the tension in any room
because that's the type of person she is
Nope. No. I can't do that. Um…
[sighs]
Well, Lily,
seems we've run into a problem.
I can't tell the girl I like
everything, now, can I?
Like how I really wanna meet you
and think about you all the time.
Yeah. No. Definitely not.
Definitely not. Definitely not. Um…
[mumbling]
Hey, are you free for dinner tonight?
- [Benny] You're not even listening.
- [Langston] I am listening.
[Benny] No, you're not.
I'm going to Puerto Rico.
What's the big deal?
[Langston] I know
what's gonna happen. Our
[Benny] So you're not even willing to try?
[Langston] No.
[Benny] Well, then… fine.
- [door opens]
- Merry Christmas.
[door opens]
[door closes]
I'm so sorry.
I heard.
Did you and Benny just
Break up? Yeah.
- Because of, uh, Puerto Rico?
- He's leaving me, Lily.
Okay, "out of sight, out of mind"
has burned me in the past,
and I am not doing long-distance
again, ever. I'm sorry. [sniffles]
Are you okay?
Obviously not.
Well, long distance isn't so bad.
Yeah, how do you know?
You've never even dated anyone.
Notebook Boy.
[chuckles] Okay.
That's not a relationship, okay?
That's a pen pal.
You can still mail him
your notebook from Fiji.
Why would I mail him
my notebook from Fiji?
Langston?
Langston, why would
I mail him the notebook from Fiji?
Do you really think Mom and Dad
are on their second honeymoon?
Wake up, Lily!
They're in Fiji
because dad is up for a job there.
- What?
- If he gets it, you're going with them.
I get to stay
because I'm an adult, legally.
Well, what if I don't wanna go to Fiji?
What does it matter?
You spend all your time
with Mom, Dad, and Grandpa anyway.
And the reason we didn't tell you
is because we knew you would freak out.
You all lied to me?
I guess
we're both having a shitty Christmas.
[sighs]
[Langston] Lily.
[mutters]
["Deck the Halls" playing]
Um, so, Leeza, what do you do?
I'm a microbiologist.
- Lovely.
- Do you like microbiology?
No.
- Oh.
- [Dash] Um, uh…
Excuse me, waiter,
could I get a seltzer, please?
Lime would be great, thank you.
So you also ski?
- Mmm.
- Yep.
- Leeza's a sporty smarty-pants.
- [chuckles]
Dash never had a taste
for the sporting life.
Couldn't get him
to touch a ball if I tried.
Well, why do you want me
touching balls so badly?
Kid's a smart aleck.
Thinks he's some kind of Sigmund Freud.
- Used to think it was a phase.
- [woman speaking indistinctly]
- What are we talking about?
- Freud.
- Always a pleasure to see you, Sofia.
- Gordon. It's been too long.
And you must be Leeza.
Dash has told me all about you.
It's lovely to meet you.
Hi, again.
Hi, again.
I, uh, found the closest exit,
so tug your ear, and we're out of here.
[both chuckling]
So you're back in town, and you're
still giving my son the time of day.
Really, it's the opposite.
I should thank Dash
for making time for me.
He's quite in demand.
It's kind of hard
to get a moment with him.
So thank you for calling me back.
- I just got back from Bolzano.
- Ooh, Bolzano!
See? That's the thing.
I've always wanted to travel with Dash,
but he'd rather have
his nose stuck in some book.
Why is that, Dash?
[Dash]
Because you never really invited me.
Because you'd always travel with one
of your girlfriends that I didn't know.
Because you cared about them more than me.
Which one should I say first, Dad?
What?
Are you gonna fight me on this one too?
[Lily] Listen to your mochi.
Listen to my mochi.
I'm sorry. What was that?
[Lily] Sometimes, the best answer
to a problem makes itself heard
but only if your mind is quiet.
[inhales, exhales deeply]
All right.
Well, I was just thinking
how you used to take me to that bookstore
by our old place. Do you remember?
On 81st.
- [Gordon] The Westsider?
- Yeah.
Yeah, I used to take
you there after T-ball.
You hated those games. Taking you there
was the only way I could get you to play.
Well, I loved going there with you.
It was probably where
I first fell in love with books.
Really?
You'd love this bookstore
we found on the Amalfi Coast.
Oh, it was beautiful and so tiny.
Gordon could barely fit inside.
I'm not kidding.
- [Gordon] Bull in a china shop.
- [Leeza chuckles]
["Holly Jolly Christmas"
by David Archuleta playing]
[sighs]
Have a holly jolly Christmas ♪
- And when you walk down the street ♪
- [sighs]
Say hello to friends you know
And everyone you meet ♪
Hi, is Boomer there yet?
Oh, okay! Well, um, can you tell me
if there's a red notebook?
Why?
Because I'm very upset,
and I need a place
to write down my feelings.
No, I don't wanna order a pizza, I
Hello?
Oh, by golly
Have a holly jolly Christmas this year ♪
[breathing heavily]
Oh, ho, the mistletoe ♪
[Dash] Let it all out.
Release your negative emotions.
If you can't find the rainbow,
then stand in the rain and scream.
- [screaming]
- Have a holly jolly Christmas ♪
- [grunting]
- And when you walk down the street ♪
Say hello to friends you know ♪
- And everyone you meet ♪
- [continues grunting]
- Year ♪
- [scream echoing]
Keep it going for your last poet!
[applauding, cheering]
[man] Keep it going!
[panting]
Okay, okay. Our next up is
[feedback squeaks]
Uh, her, apparently.
Sorry. You know, I'm just kind
of on a roll right now. You know?
Edgar. Are you here?
Uh, Edgar?
- [crowd giggling, chattering]
- No?
Okay.
Well…
I just beat the crap out of something,
and it felt amazing.
- [whooping, light cheering]
- [woman] Yeah!
Thank you.
Thank you. Yeah, 'cause, you know,
it's okay to say that things suck.
Like… like… like my family,
right now, they suck.
And, uh, these wall sconces.
Sorry, but, uh, suckfest on ice!
- [crowd laughing]
- [man] Yeah!
Because I'm not holding back.
Not after Fiji!
Here's the truth,
I'm not happy and positive all the time.
In fact, I usually feel
small and like an outsider…
Because of, um…
Him!
There he is.
My middle-school bully in the flesh.
That night at the middle-school dance
when you got that bracelet you're wearing?
That night changed everything for me.
Because of you,
I stayed home every time I had
the chance to go out and make friends.
I don't go to parties.
I run away from clubs.
You kept me from wanting to go out
and… and put myself out there,
and you stopped me
from doing all the things
that I wanted to do for so long.
And the worst part is…
You don't even remember.
[sniffles] And now you have
the audacity to ask me out?
Maybe he liked you!
No!
No! I'm tired of boys pulling
our pigtails and getting called cute!
- Right?
- [woman] Yes!
- [cheering]
- God, it makes me so mad, and I am mad.
I'm mad at you! I'm mad at my mom!
I'm mad at Langston and myself!
But you?
You don't get to have
that power over me anymore, Edgar.
You don't.
I wish I could have gone
up to you that day after the dance
and told you how upset you made me.
And gotten it out of my system
and lived a normal life.
I wish I could have
stood up to all the bullies
who made me feel too weird,
too different, too Asian.
But you know what?
I was only 12 years old.
So was I.
I had no idea that I did any of that.
I… I'm such a dumb-ass.
I'm so sorry, Lily.
- You are?
- Yeah, of course. I feel terrible.
I… I wish I could go back, but I…
[sighs]
Can I make it up to you?
How?
You wanna go to a Christmas Eve party
with me tomorrow night?
- What?
- [Edgar] Just some friends from school.
I… I can introduce you.
I'm really good with parties.
Okay.
- [man 1] Yeah. Whoo!
- [woman 1] All right!
[crowd cheering, applauding]
[man 2] Whoo!
- [woman 2] Whoo!
- [man 2] Keep it going!
[crowd whooping, applauding]
I am really happy you came.
Hey, when I get back,
maybe we could stop by that bookstore?
- Sure.
- Yeah?
Yeah, sure.
Hey, I'm glad
you and Sofia got back together.
- Oh, no, we're not back together.
- [chuckles]
I may not know much,
but I know women.
See you in the new year, kiddo.
All right.
Um, excuse me? Who was that in there?
That was not the Dash that I know.
[chuckles] You didn't even need me.
Thanks for coming tonight.
I know it probably wasn't what you meant
when you asked to hang out.
No, I'm glad you reached out.
It was good to see you.
You, too.
Uh, the reason
I wanted to talk to you is because…
I'm moving back.
To New York.
Oh, wow.
And I wanted to make sure
that we were okay.
- Which it seems like we are.
- Yeah. [chuckles]
Maybe even friends again?
I… Yeah. Friends sounds good.
Hey, uh, some people
from school are hanging out
if you're not too socially exhausted.
You want to go?
Um… well, is Priya gonna be there?
[chuckles]
Come on, it'll be fun. Let's go.
[Lily] It's hard to break old habits,
to open yourself up to something new.
But if you can do it, Notebook Boy,
then I promise to try.
I hope you write back soon.
[Priya]Dashiell Malloy?
Back from Sweden and out past 11.
- Hi.
- Hi, Priya.
I must be seeing things.
Mmm. Well, the Christmas lights
make you look especially calculating.
Hmm.
Glad to see nothing's changed here.
[Edgar]Yo!
Dash! Dash!
Hey, Thibaud.
Oh, you… you'd really like this.
I just got back from a poetry reading.
[laughs]
I mean, no institution is immune
to poetic justice. Am I right?
Wow, it's a whole new Thibaud.
Yeah, you know, I actually had
kind of a breakthrough tonight.
Me, too.
Hey, are you going
to Priya's party tomorrow night?
Yeah, Dashiell. Are you coming
to my undoubtably delightful
Christmas Eve party,
which many would trade
their very souls to attend?
I'm going. Bringing a girl.
- [Dash] Wow.
- [chuckles]
Congratulations.
Yo!
You don't have to, but…
Maybe we can go together.
As friends?
["That Holiday Feelin'"
by Mr. & Mrs. playing]
[Lily] I guess this is me saying,
go with the flow.
Sure, I'll go.
Why not?
- Holiday ♪
- The one you hold so dear ♪
I got that holiday feelin' ♪
Jingle all the way holiday feelin' ♪
I got that holiday feelin' ♪
Holi, holi, holi, holi, holi, holiday ♪
I got that holiday feelin' ♪
Hot chocolate holiday feelin' ♪
I get that holiday feelin'
Every time you're near me ♪
- Holiday ♪
- It's that time of year ♪
- Holiday ♪
- When you whisper in my ear ♪
- Holiday ♪
- I love you, Santa baby ♪
- Holiday ♪
- Your words sound so sincere ♪
- Holiday ♪
- It's that time of year ♪
- Holiday ♪
- When we sing and spread good cheer ♪
- Holiday ♪
- And the greatest gift of all ♪
- Holiday ♪
- Is always that you're near ♪
I got that holiday feelin' ♪
Hot chocolate holiday feelin' ♪
I get that holiday feelin'
Every time you're near me ♪
I got that holiday feelin' ♪
Jingle all the way holiday feelin' ♪
I got that holiday feelin' ♪
- Every time you're near me ♪
- Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪