Fortunes of War (1987) s01e05 Episode Script

-Welcome in Egypt, sir.
-All right, bloody hell.
Sir, give me your bag.
Welcome in Egypt.
Welcome in Egypt.
-That's right, straight along there.
-Thank you.
Welcome.
Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen, good afternoon.
Gentlemen to your right, ladies to the left.
There you go, sir.
- This way here, please, sir.
-There you go, to your right.
Thank you.
Madam? Over there, thank you very much.
Ladies and children over there, thank you very much indeed.
There you are, sir.
Hope you'll be nice and comfortable.
This way, please, sir.
Now where have you brought me? -Apparently, this place was once a brothel.
-Oh, I've never been in one.
Have you? No, not really.
This was closed down by the authorities and then requisitioned by the military for use by refugees.
-Are we still refugees? -Yes, we are, darling.
How do we stop being refugees? Well, I must find us a job, and you must find us somewhere to live.
So, that's how it's done.
Understood? Hope you enjoyed your stay, sir and madam.
Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye! Oh, shut up! Goodbye! Goodbye! Goodbye! British Council offices.
Where are they going in such a hurry? Well, for a decent drink, I imagine.
And so are we.
Come on.
The Anglo-Egyptian Union.
This is the hub of the universe.
In Cairo, anyway.
-Ah, there's Dobson! -So it must be the hub of the universe.
-Harriet, Guy.
-Hello.
This is Bill Castlebar.
He teaches at Cairo University.
-How do you do? -Guy Pringle, Harriet Pringle.
-How do you do? -Very nice to meet you.
-Castlebar the poet? -That's right.
Well, I've read your works.
-The dirty bits? -All of it.
-I like your husband.
-So do I most of the time.
Farouk! Beer for everybody! -Have you been in touch with the organisation? -Sorry? Which organisation? Yours.
The Council.
About work.
Um, well, I thought we'd settle in for a few days, try to find an escape route from our brothel.
Brothel? - We're staying in a brothel.
-Really? Well, you'd be well-advised to find work first, then escape from your brothel later.
Cairo is awash with English teachers.
Yes, I'm told that Gracey runs the organisation here.
Is that true? -Alas and alack.
-He hates Guy.
I thought he was a semi-invalid.
That's what he told us.
Well, the advance of the German army worked wonders for his health.
At any rate, like it or not, Gracey's the man you've got to be nice to.
You might be too late.
That's where they were going in that taxi.
Well, I'll have a word with him now.
-Excuse us.
-Sure.
The first human being ever to admit to reading my poetry.
Everybody likes Guy Pringle.
He reads everybody's poetry? Yes, I think he probably does.
The fact is, Pringle, we're already overstaffed.
Men have been turning up from all over Europe.
What about Mr Lush and Mr Dubedat? -They are working for me, yes.
-Since when, about an hour ago? We went to Head Office.
It's the proper thing to do.
We could have gone straight to the nearest bar.
But we didn't.
And you must bear in mind the sterling service that Mr Lush and Mr Dubedat performed for me in Athens, whence all but they had fled.
Only because they were the first to run away from Bucharest! I don't think your attitude is going to help, Mrs Pringle! Have you been given a job, too? I am taking a short holiday while preparing my lecture on Byron.
But no doubt you advised Mr Gracey on his appointments.
-If you can keep your wife quiet for a minute -Look, do you mind? There's a business college in Alexandria.
They might want somebody.
Alexandria? -Is Guy enjoying Alexandria? -No, he hates it.
He says it's like Birmingham.
-Has he ever been to Birmingham? -No.
-How are your homely Egyptian digs? -Like Birmingham.
-There is a vacant room at the Garden City.
-Oh, good.
Of course, you might find the inhabitants rather eccentric.
Good.
-Looking for someone? -A Miss Edwina Little.
-Friend of yours? -Well, a friend of my brother's.
Edwina! Come on, everyone.
- Do tell me who you are.
-Me? Tell me who you are, so I can say hello.
My name is Simon Boulderstone.
Hugo's brother.
Hugo? Hugo Boulderstone, presumably.
Hello, Simon.
Look, are we going or are we not going? Yes, you are going.
And you must take Simon with you.
Do come back later, Simon, when my headache's better.
-Promise me you'll come back later.
-I promise.
Good, that's settled.
Now come on, everybody.
Give me that ruddy animal.
Now, then, right leg Up.
There we are.
Come on, come on.
Where are we going? To see the sights.
He's never seen the pyramids.
Welcome to Cairo.
Bloody show-off! We've been out here several months.
Seems like forever.
-We? -My husband's got a job in Alexandria.
Well, couldn't you join him? I've got a job here, sticking pins in maps at the American Embassy.
Careless talk, Mrs Pringle.
Do forgive me, Mr Clifford.
So what's happening at the front, young man? Well, I only arrived today, and I'm on a 48.
I know nothing.
Thought you looked a young'un.
They say the Auk's made plans for the evacuation of Cairo.
Well, I don't believe it.
It'll be blue murder.
You can hear the gyppos and the wogs laughing about it.
Merry fellow, your wog.
Can't help liking him.
Right, anybody game for a few tombs? -Is this the one with the bats? - I don't like the look of it.
Afraid to come with us, young lady? -Yes.
-Good God.
I'm claustrophobic.
I don't like bats, don't like tombs.
Doesn't leave much room for enjoyment.
I'll keep Mrs Pringle company whilst you go and enjoy your tombs.
Young people.
Would you like us to look after your dog? Hmm? Oh, no.
Troilus adores tombs.
Oh, for God's sake.
Who are they and what do they do? Mr Liversage is retired.
He spends his time collecting money for charity in his dog.
-How do you collect money in a dog? -It has a slot in its back.
Don't talk balderdash, man.
I've been round these bloody tombs before! -And Mr Clifford? -He's an agent for an oil company.
He's showing off because you're a fighting man and he isn't, and he ought to be.
If he wants to stay out of it, good luck to him.
Is he right about the Egyptians turning against us? Why shouldn't they? What have we done for them? Well, we've brought them justice and prosperity.
Prosperity? Nothing's changed for them in a thousand years.
But we're protecting them now.
We're protecting the Suez Canal, the route to India.
Clifford's oil company.
It's nothing to do with the people.
We just stick pins in maps.
I see.
Tell you what.
We'll call on the Hoopers.
-The Hoopers? -Who are they? Sir Desmond and Lady Hooper.
He's a sort of unofficial diplomat.
Knows all your top brass.
He'll tell us what's going on.
- Where are we going? - We're going to see the Hoopers.
Merry folk, your Hoopers.
Who are they? No, I'm afraid Angela's not here.
She's out on a painting expedition with our son.
And what brings you into Baboushi? -Voyage of discovery, you might call it.
-Oh.
Is there anything to discover in this much-pillaged country? What I'd like to discover is what the hell's going on in the desert? I'm afraid I can't answer that question, Mr Clifford.
Yes, but it's vi It's vital for my company's interests to know exactly what's happening.
Desmond! Desmond! Desmond! -Desmond! -My dear, what is it? I think he'll be all right.
Put him over there.
Wait, wait, wait.
We were in the desert, and I was painting and I didn't see.
But he was playing and there was an explosion and But he'll be all right.
Yes, I expect he's suffering from shock.
Do you think we ought to rouse him? Perhaps he should have something to eat.
Hmm? Yes, something nourishing, something light and easy to swallow.
Gruel, or an egg beaten up.
Yes, and he ought to have an anti-tetanus injection.
There was some Dettol in the car, and I I bathed his head.
Now I've seen everything.
Did you see it? Did you see what they did? That child was dead and they tried to feed him.
My God.
Well, did you see it? I expect I shall see worse before long.
It's cooler now.
Simon would like to climb the pyramid.
Well, I'm not climbing any pyramids.
Young people.
Come on.
Nearly there.
Have you ever climbed up here before? Yeah, once.
I'd been to a party with Guy.
I was in a long evening dress.
What did you do once you were here? We sang.
Run RabbitRun.
Come on.
# Run, rabbit, run, rabbit, run, run, run # Don't give the farmer his fun, fun, fun # He'll get by without his rabbit pie # So run, rabbit, run, rabbit, run, run, run # That poor child.
There's nothing we can do about death.
Sometimes we can help the wounded.
That's all.
Nothing else? Nothing else.
-What's your name, rifleman? -Arnold, sir.
-How do you find your way around? -You get the hang of it, sir.
-And you've been out here some time? -Yes, sir.
Sidi Barrani and the Benghazi Handicap.
-How was it? -Blue bloody murder, sir.
Don't have me shot for saying it, but Rommel's a genius.
All the lads think so.
-Where are the Germans now? -Over there.
How can you tell? You get the hang of that, too, sir.
Yeah, give us one of those.
Tea, sir? -Thank you, sergeant.
-Yes, sir.
-Sergeant.
-Yes, sir? Have you any idea what's going on? Not for me to say, sir, but I reckon Major Hardy's got us lost again.
You get used to that.
You get used to all of it.
It don't take long.
-What's it like, Sergeant, being under fire? -(WHISPERING) Now, who's left this here? No, you don't think about it, sir.
Thinking about it, that's the mistake.
Mind you, when you see some bugger cop it, you think, ''Right, you bastards.
I'll get you for that.
'' You've got to hate 'em, at the time, or else you'll be no good.
Prepare to move out! Sounds like the old bugger's worked out where we are.
Where is the enemy now, Mrs Pringle? -There.
The little row of baby swastikas.
-Oh, dear.
In today's broadcast, they say that we will drive the British out of Africa.
Thank you.
How do you feel about a German occupation, Iqal? They are invaders like all the invaders that come here for hundreds of years.
The British can't afford to lose the Middle East.
Can't afford? Oh, deary me, Mrs Pringle.
How many people can't afford? The French, the Poles, the Dutch, could they afford? You know, in my heart I say, better the devil you know.
But I am brushing up on my German to be on the safe side.
Mrs Pringle, did you get that supply of yellow pins? -Yes.
-Good.
Here.
What's wrong? The Japanese attacked Pearl Harbor.
Pearl Harbor? There you are.
Oh, my dear sir, how very generous.
Is that all for us? Taxi for Lord Pinkrose.
Taxi for Lord Pinkrose.
Taxi for Lord Pinkrose.
That's the rest of it.
Miserable clowns, come on.
Have you packed your bags yet, Harriet? Why should I pack my bags? There's a special train leaving Cairo at 9:00 in the morning for women and children.
-When did I ever behave like a woman? -And where is it going, this very special train? -Palestine, I think.
-I'd rather go to Alexandria.
The Germans are 50 miles outside Alexandria.
-I know.
That's why I want to go.
-To check up on Rommel? To check up on Guy.
I've been trying to telephone all week.
It's a waste of time.
-Are there trains running to Alexandria? -Yes, occasionally.
-I'll drive you to Alex.
-You're as foolhardy as Harriet is.
-I do hope so.
-Very well, I will simply repeat.
In my official capacity, I am advising you to catch the early train in the interest of safety and security.
Thank you for the advice.
- Dobbo -What? -Bollocks.
-Seconded.
Noted.
# There's a small hotel With a wishing well # I wish that we were there together # You seem happy.
Is that the word? I'm afraid you may be right.
I'm in love.
Good.
Anyone I know? -I think you've met.
-Who? Sorry.
Strictly clandestine and carnal.
-Any more questions? -Yes.
Are you married? Hey-ho.
Straight for the jugular.
-Meet you at the hotel at six? -Yes.
Will you be all right? As a dear friend once said, ''Do I look like a military objective?'' -What happened to your friend? -Somebody shot him.
-Hello, darling! -Hello.
Wow, this is the nicest thing that's happened to me in ages! By the look of the place, it's the only thing that's happened for ages.
Well, so Finnegan's Wake? You're not trying to lecture them on Finnegan's Wake? I have two exceptionally brilliant students.
I've just walked along several miles of corridor without seeing any students at all.
Well, the level of enthusiasm varies.
It's to do with climate, you know.
-I've come to take you back to Cairo.
-Oh, don't be silly, darling.
Guy, the Germans are 50 miles away.
But this isn't Athens.
There we only had the sea.
Here we have the whole of Africa.
-Do you ever look at maps? -Well, no, English is my speciality, actually.
And can we talk about this later? I have some people to meet.
And so do you now.
Come on.
I love you, but I can't remember why.
Are you waiting for Guy Pringle? -Usually, yes.
-He'll be along in a few minutes.
My name is Aidan Pratt.
You must be Harriet.
-Yes.
This is Bill Castlebar.
-Hello.
-I'm on leave from Damascus.
- Damascus? How do you know Guy? Last time I was here, somebody told me a story.
Two men were shipwrecked on a desert island.
Neither knew the other, but they both knew Guy Pringle.
Funny and clean.
A unique combination.
Ah! You found each other.
And you recognised this one? I knew I'd seen you before.
Aidan Sheridan.
Here in the same bar, we have Aidan Sheridan, the great actor, and William Castlebar, the great poet.
No, I was Aidan Sheridan.
Now I'm Captain Pratt of the Pay Corps.
I saw you play Konstantin in The Seagull.
I'd never seen any Chekhov before.
-At the end, I went out crying.
-It was my first big role.
I talked to myself in my dressing room mirror.
I said, ''This is the beginning.
'' And so it was.
You played Henry V, Romeo, Oswald Hamlet? -Hamlet was next.
-So it is for us all.
-We could do it for the troops! -Couldn't work with amateurs.
And are the troops lusting to see Hamlet? Well, I very much doubt it.
Ah, very well, then.
We'll get drunk.
Um -And then you'll come back to Cairo with us? -Yes, yes, I'll come back to Cairo.
-It's beer all round, is it? -Definitely.
Right, several gallons of nut brown ale, if you please.
-You'll come back to Cairo? -Yes, yes, at the weekend.
What was that? 3.
7s.
Germans must be attacking the harbour.
Oh, they're getting closer.
Yes, it happens most days.
Bofors, I'd guess, wouldn't you? They've gone for the lighthouse again.
Like Caesar.
But you could help and advise, couldn't you? -Sorry, about what? -About Hamlet.
Ah, thank you.
Here they come.
-What do you think? -Too far.
Right, Martin, when you're ready.
Battery GF target.
HE 1 06E, map reference 24701 2.
1 40 feet.
Three rounds gunfire, five enemy vehicles.
Fire! Fire! Fire! Little higher! Range bearing 6-600! Loaded! Fire! Yeah! Capital, Martin.
Capital! Get those two running away.
Those guys under the trucks.
Rapid fire! Rapid fire! What are you trying to do, sir? Give them headache? Save it.
You always bury the German dead? If there's time.
They do the same for us.
Even younger than you, that one, sir.
Morning.
What are the German broadcasts saying this morning, Iqal? Oh Rise up against your oppressors and you will be free.
We your oppressors? You break through the palace gates and tell my king what to do.
Is that not oppression? We're fighting a war, Iqal.
Ah, my friends would say time enough.
When the Germans are at the gates, then cut the English throats.
Come now, you wouldn't cut my throat.
Believe me, Mrs Pringle, if I would cut your throat, I'd do it in a kind and considerate manner.
-You wouldn't hurt me? -Indeed, I would not.
Ma'am, if I might have a word.
I've had confirmation that now the United States is in the war officially.
-New staff members will arrive any day.
-Meaning? Sadly, there will no longer be employment for any aliens, apart from translators.
-Am I an alien? -Technically, yes, I'm afraid you are.
An alien.
Perhaps you must cut his throat, Mrs Pringle.
I beg your pardon? -Some German translations, sir.
-Carry on.
Information room.
Just one moment, please.
A Mr Dobson.
An eminent diplomat would like to speak to Mrs Pringle.
Thank you.
Dobbie.
-Are you not eating? -Not hungry.
You've lost weight since you came here.
Possibly.
Not much to lose.
-He said he'd be here half an hour ago.
-Who? -Guess.
-Guy? Oh, he's always late.
Why is he coming here? I have news for him.
Ah, here he is.
Hello.
-Is tea all right for you? -Yes, yes, as far as it goes.
-''Hello, Harriet, hello, darling.
'' -Oh, hello, darling.
You promised to escape to Cairo several weekends ago.
-Do you remember? -Yes, and here I am.
I have news for you both.
Gracey's been sacked as Director of the organisation here in Cairo.
How can they sack him? He ran away, along with Pinkrose and Lush and Dubedat.
A telegram will pursue him across the Levant informing him he's been sacked.
Yes, but why has he been sacked? I mean, the organisation doesn't normally sack people for incompetence.
I mean, not even for cowardice.
I understand there was some question of immoral practices on a houseboat.
With a Turk.
Ooh, sounds rather good.
I imagine the fact that it was a Turk rather tipped the scales against him.
No wonder he has back trouble.
So who's going to replace him? Are they gonna fly someone out? No, no, they're appointing a chap from Alexandria.
Really? Who? Me? Oh.
-Well, another new home.
-Another new home.
I mean, we have new homes like other people have mice.
We're all quite informal here.
-This is the lovely Edwina.
- Ah.
Dobbie always told me you were a pet.
-Hello, how do you do? -Hello.
I wish I had a husband like this one.
We'll discuss it privately sometime.
It's going to be such fun.
I think I've found someone for the spare room.
Don't you ever get tired of organising people's lives, Dobbie? No, it saves me the trouble of organising my own.
I'll show you our room.
-Can we leave that till later, darling? -Later? I have some people to meet.
-Already? -Yes.
Good afternoon, ladies andgentlemen.
Myname is GuyPringle.
Iam your newDirector, and thankyou all verymuch for coming here atsuch shortnotice.
Now, I realise that over the past few weeks at the Institute, you have all been operating under very difficult circumstances.
I understand, moreover, that you've seen nothing of Professors Gracey, Dubedat and Lush.
Now, together, we will remedy that situation and I shall start by making sure that you are paid the money that is due to you.
Also, now, we shall order more books for the library, and we shall start a gramophone library.
There will be weekly play readings and poetry readings, and there will be music and dancing.
Yes, and in addition, I am planning a series of lectures on modern poetry by the famous English poet William Castlebar.
I'm also approaching Professor Lord Pinkrose, the world-famous authority on Byron, to give a paper on that subject.
And, a little later, I intend to mount a production of Hamlet with the assistance of Aidan Sheridan, possibly the finest young actor on the West End stage in the years immediately before the war.
But there is one very important thing.
We do need more teachers.
So, please, spread it among your English-speaking friends.
The work is regular and the pay is good.
So, thank you all very much for your enthusiasm and concern.
And I shall see you all tomorrow morning at 9:00.
Thank you.
Was I all right this afternoon, darling? You were splendid.
Good.
Have you asked them? Who? What? Pinkrose, Castlebar and Aidan Sheridan.
About their lectures and Hamlet and so forth.
Well, not exactly.
I will ask them.
I mean, they'll be keen to help.
Yes, I expect they will.
Guy.
-Yes, darling.
-Welcome home.
Wherever it is.
Thank you.
I must talk to Aidan, you know.
People always get it wrong about Ophelia.
I think thatshe # I'll see blue again # Whenever spring breaks through again # Time may lie heavybetween # This section, Martin.
Quite sublime.
# Ispast forgetting # This sweetmemory -Good night, sir.
-Good night, Simon.
-Good night, Martin.
-Good night.
# Though my world maygo awry Good night, sir.
# In myheart will ever lie #Just the echo ofa sigh goodbye # Why don't they attack? Same reason we don't.
Short of supplies and a long way from home.
-Any news of your brother, sir? -Yes.
Seems he's with the M6th New Zealand brigade.
They were at Bab El Qattara a couple of months or so before the Germans moved in.
-Aren't the Kiwis at the ridge now? -Yes.
Well, we could drive there in a couple of hours.
I suggested that to the CO.
He told me not to be so bloody silly.
Myjob is to stand by and await orders.
Same job as mine, sir.
We'd like a word with the Director.
Well, good heavens! I thought you were in Palestine.
-We've come back.
-Well, a plague of lecturers.
And we onlyjust got rid of the frogs and the locusts.
We've come to, uhcongratulate you on your new appointment.
-Well, thank you very much.
-It couldn't have happened to a nicer chap.
-And you need work, do you? -And we need work.
It was ghastly in Jerusalem.
Pinkrose stayed at the King David, we were stuck in the refugee camp.
We gather you're recruiting for new staff.
Well, yes, but -the thing is -I know you'd prefer English-speaking wogs but You didn't give them work? I'll find them a little part-time lecturing, I expect.
-You have a heart of pure marshmallow.
-Shh! Edwina's about to make her entrance.
Peter, darling, come and meet my adorable friends.
Harriet, Guy and sweet Dobbie.
I see.
Civilians, are we? I have the body of a weak and feeble woman.
Military, are we? Stuck at GHQ.
Not from choice.
I'm a fighting man, pure and simple.
Well, not so pure, but pretty bloody simple.
Ready, old thing? Ready.
Well, we'll leave you to your home comforts.
What was that? Does it have a name? His name is Lord Lisdoonvarna.
Oh, well, only the aristocracy could manufacture a name like that.
What does she see in him? She sees Lady Lisdoonvarna.
Shh.
-Job for you tomorrow, Arnold.
-Sir? Take the wagon to the New Zealanders on the ridge and assist with my inquiries concerning Captain Hugo Boulderstone.
-Are we going to see your brother? -Yes.
I'm very pleased, sir.
Carry on, rifleman.
He's whistling in the dark.
We all do that.
What do you keep in here, Arnold? Scorpion, sir.
Can I have a look at it? Yeah.
Be careful.
-Christ! -Be careful, sir! Be careful! I got him.
There you go, you little bugger.
-What were you in Civvy Street, Arnold? -Student, sir.
-What were you reading? -Zoology.
Durham University.
-Took finals a week before the outbreak of war.
-I see.
That's why I like to look at scorpions and spiders.
It's an apology, really.
They belong here, we don't.
You're a remarkable bloke, Arnold.
Everybody's remarkable if you care to look, sir.
He's over there, Corporal.
-Corporal Peters? -Sir.
I understand you're in my brother's platoon.
-You're just like him, sir.
-We are brothers.
I'm sorry, sir.
-What do you mean? -Didn't they tell you? I'm sorry, sir, but your brother's dead.
He was a great bloke, sir.
Were you with him? Will you tell me about it, please, Corporal? We were on patrol, picking up wounded.
We were sort of, like, protecting the ambulance.
Makes a good target, an ambulance, moving against the skyline.
The Germans knew what it was.
Mortars, they used.
They kept on till they got the lot.
We were all sort of scattered, so I went looking forfor your brother.
When I found him, he was in a bad way.
Tell me.
Well they'd shot his legs off.
I told him we should try to make it back to camp, but he wasn't having any.
''A chap's no good with two wooden legs,'' he said.
He tried to make me go, but I stayed with him.
About 2:00 in the morning it was when he finally went.
That's when he said, ''I'm going, Peters.
'' And he went.
-Do you know the way, Arnold? -Like the back of my hand, sir.
-Hello.
-Hello.
-I'm Angela Hooper.
Do you live here? -Yes.
I'm moving in.
Dobbie invited me.
Oh, yes, he said someone was arriving.
Where's your luggage? It's on its way.
Probably lost, I should think.
Shukran.
You think I've forgotten where and when we met.
I wasn't quite sure.
The day my little boy was killed.
I was hoping you didn't remember.
I remember every last detail.
I remember the people in the room.
-You, the man with the dog -Mr Liversage.
That loud-mouthed oil man Clifford, and a young officer -Simon Boulderstone.
-I remember them all.
I brought in my boy, and you were all in the room.
He was a beautiful boy, wasn't he? His body was untouched.
But a piece of metal had gone into his brain and killed him.
We couldn't believe it, but next day, of course, we had to bury him.
Yes, well, we we wondered if there was something we could do, but all we could do was go away.
I went away, too, not long after that.
I couldn't stay in that house.
Everything ended for me that afternoon.
Child, marriage oh, that ridiculous life of dinner parties, gaming parties, shooting parties.
Well, I've done with that.
I'm getting a divorce.
I've found somebody to restore my sanity.
Don't worry.
It is restored.
Angela.
Bill! That's right.
-Let's have a bottle of scotch.
-Splendid idea.
-Harriet, don't go.
-I can see Guy.
I must congratulate him on only being two hours late.
Bring him over here.
Scotch will certainly tempt him.
Bit of a lark, Mrs Pringle.
-Bit of a lark, Mr Liversage.
-Mmm.
-Hello.
-Hello, darling.
-Look who's here.
-Hello, Aidan.
Are you going to play Hamlet? -No.
-Oh.
But another five minutes, though, I might have said yes to Rosencrantz.
-Did I see you talking to that Hooper woman? -Yes.
She's our new neighbour.
-I'm told she's as mad as a hatter.
-No.
I think perhaps she was once, but she's come through to the other side.
-Hmm.
-And we still have to make that journey.
What? Don't be absurd.
Cheers.
If you were my father, would you want to know how I died? Or would the simple fact be sufficient? Well, it's not for me to say, sir, but if you're not happy with it but if you're not happy with it