Hiccups and Hookups (2021) s01e05 Episode Script

1
Okay.
What?
It's a freaking dick pic!
Eww!
Some people are really,
like, freaking pricks!
Fuck! He just
ruined my appetite!
During Covid, so many people
spoke to each other for months
before meeting
offline for a day.
Why? In the end,
what does everyone want? Sex.
Guys, matching people by feeding keywords
into the algo is a very basic idea.
These days,
even food delivery bots do the same.
Guys, to rewrite the code,
we have to write,
think and act out of the box.
So, you're saying swing
away from perfect matches?
Too risky, man!
We need to put these
thoughts into the logic design
and see if it's
mathematically possible.
Let's lock this for a test run.
The results will tell us if
it's uber cool or not so cool.
Let's do it, man.
Hello.
This place feels
so much like home.
I had forgotten.
It's been only eight months
since you've been here,
not eight years.
You look quite happy.
Here. Sign this.
We had to separate
bank accounts.
I have a pen.
Would you like some breakfast?
No. I have to go to work today,
Dhruv.
Come on,
Vasu! Let's have a quick breakfast.
Think about it. Pancake
bonanza. Today's special.
- Come on. Let's do it.
- No. The service here
is too slow. - No.
Come on.
Quick. Quick. Quick.
Anything for you guys?
Rohan, two pancake breakfasts.
An orange juice for me,
and a watermelon juice for him.
No ice, please. - Okay.
How are things at Enso?
They're okay.
And I'm just totally focused,
at least until the exhibition.
Hmm.
At least, you're direct about things,
unlike Kay.
Seriously, right?
I can't believe she did that!
Thank you. - Welcome, sir.
She put so much pressure on me!
She took money
from both you and me.
And what did she think?
That we wouldn't find out?
Until you messaged me saying,
'I bought Kay a laptop.'
Obviously!
I also wanted to prove that
I could also buy her things.
It's okay. You can say it.
'Oh,
why are you being so difficult?'
When did I say anything?
Did I say anything?
Well
In fact,
I'm absolutely and completely with you.
I know you're managing your own finances,
you wanna make your own money.
Awesome. Go ahead.
Anyway,
what's to be done with the both of us
is something I can decide
only after the exhibition.
And then I'll just
speak to her after that.
Vasu,
whatever help you need with the exhibition,
do let me know.
Dhruv,
I don't want any sympathy or any help.
This is one thing that
I want to do by myself.
I know.
Eww!
Oh God! Men just
have a one-track mind.
Nothing. - Who was that?
It's nothing.
Nothing.
Sir.
- A package has arrived.
- So, keep it outside.
Sir,
it's for everyone. It has come by air.
'By air?'
'Hey, Akhil.'
'Considering we may work together,
'
'I thought, just like in your dating app,
we should get to know each other.'
'For your team. Rock on!'
'JC.'
Check out this Rubik's Cube!
Hostel days, man!
That's great, bro.
This is thinking and
acting out of the box.
Just like you wanted us to do,
right?
Pankaj sir, you got that?
Guys,
we've been looking at some new artists
for the End of
the Era exhibition.
And we have a few of them here.
We just want to show them to you.
Sure.
Fatty,
can you help me with the projector?
Oh, yeah.
Okay.
In the last two years,
Enso's faded out from people's memories.
So,
we're looking at a bunch of new artists
who, you know,
have larger Instagram followings,
have brand collaborations,
are able to draw
in bigger crowds.
And they know how to make art,
but more importantly,
they know how to sell art.
Plus, the old ones are too big!
They're hard to catch hold of.
I mean, I've tried. But we don't
have much time before the exhibition.
And the bigger ones,
you're right,
are pretty unavailable.
And then there are these
two. Sameer-Sawant.
They've got great publicity.
And they just had a show in Japan. So,
they've also got a lot of cred.
Okay. So, there are a few more.
I think this second
one is quite cool. Yeah.
- Yeah.
Isn't it? - Yeah.
These are fantastic, guys.
- You've done a lot in two weeks.
- Right.
Guys, if you all are good
with these new artists, then
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
- No! No! No! No! No! No! No! No!
- Oh!
See that? - I'm sorry, guys!
Chakra opened!
- I was on Kechup,
and gave Shandilya Panigrahi my number.
I thought if I don't respond,
he'd get the hint.
Some people are
just strange like that.
Fatty, I can't turn it off!
- Why don't you just block this guy? Right?
- Yeah!
No. I'm gonna do that.
I'm gonna tell them
that this This is just not
Not done.
Hey, doc. - Akhil. Have a seat.
My journal. - Oh! Thank you.
Nice, nice.
This is good.
Yeah. Let's begin.
My grandma had such
curtains at her house.
Okay then. Hmm.
How have you been?
Doc, everyone in my office
has become a fan of JC!
And he hasn't even
become the CEO yet.
'Ooh, JC loves this book!'
'JC does wild treks alone!'
'Elon Musk retweeted JC!'
And Pankaj is behaving as if JC will
come on board as the CEO and investor.
It's undermining my confidence,
doc.
Or maybe it's all
just in my head.
Did you talk to Pankaj?
What do I say to Pankaj?
And JC coming on board
as the investor and CEO
would be great for Kechup.
That's a fact.
But whenever his face comes to mind,
I have an urge to slap him hard, doc.
Doc,
do you remember Strange Girl Ila?
Mm-hmm.
I can't stop thinking about her,
doc.
Okay.
What 'okay'?
What 'what okay'? Go on.
Doc,
sometimes, I don't get you, man.
It's not necessary to
understand everything.
- So, I've been ignoring Ila for weeks.
- Mm-hmm.
I don't know if it's her dedication
to yoga or something else,
but she still texts me.
And it's not that I
don't want to meet her.
But I just think I could fall in
love with her and mess things up.
What will happen then,
doc? Her life is as open as a lift.
And she also has a cool boyfriend,
Krish.
So, I decided to ignore her.
But I can't even do that!
Doc,
why are emotions so erratic?
Why can't I be calm
and in control of them?
Emotions are like guests.
Let them come,
hang for a bit and let them go.
Don't keep them in
your house permanently.
So, the emotions I have for Ila,
I let them hang out and then bid goodbye?
Is that what you mean?
Seriously,
man! That is some bro advice.
Listen,
Akhil. It's going to be alright.
We'll work through
this together. Okay?
I'll send you some stuff
to read and to watch.
And of course,
we'll continue therapy too.
Can't we just conveniently
put the mild depression blame
entirely on my parents?
I love the place. - Yeah?
It has the vibe, you know.
The vibe, you know? - Yeah.
So, we're looking for someone
who'd be willing to take a
risk by supporting our vision.
- Yes.
And Because our next
project is very ambitious.
It's called 'Roots Up'
And, uh, 'Fruits Down'.
And on that note,
let's take a selfie.
Please. Why not?
So, why don't you have a look at, uh,
what we did a year ago in Spain?
- Sure.
Uh, so, this was, uh,
seven countries of Europe
together in one
art form. Brilliant!
And, uh,
what did we have back then anyway?
One simple design,
and, uh, we used, what,
seven to eight local faces
for this beautiful installation.
We bring in a real tree,
and we hang it upside down.
- Yes.
As in, 'roots up,
and fruits down'.
And there will be three acrobats
who'll be hanged for around,
what, 15 minutes?
- Yeah.
And they'll perform
their best stunts.
And what will we do with
the tree after the exhibition?
Throw it away?
Absolutely! - Absolutely!
Great!
Seriously, man!
This is 'Roots Up,
and Fruits Down', guys.
Excuse me.
Thanks.
Hey, wait for me!
Listen, don't you think they're a
case of 'ass up, and head down'?
- I really think so.
- On that note,
let's take a selfie!
Hey, sis. - Hey.
Take this. - Thank God!
This is exactly what I needed.
How's it going?
In your words, I'm shit scared.
Oh!
Did you see dad's
video sermon today?
I'll show you. - Show me.
I'll show you.
You have to see it!
'You are a nothing.'
'Your whole
existence is nothing.'
'We are all nothing.'
'And we are connected
to the great force.'
That's why I say,
sis, don't worry.
You are nothing.
No! You are nothing!
Mad!
So,
why are you smiling
like a college girl?
Shut up! Get out!
Welcome to my world, sis.
He's so cheesy!
Was he always cheesy? - Exactly!
Fuck, seriously?
Roshan sir, I want to talk to
the kids for a couple of minutes.
Anyway, they're scrolling on
their phones. Go for it, man!
Thank you.
Hi, guys.
Okay. So, the jerseys are here.
This is what it looks like.
What do you guys think?
Cool! - Cool!
Nice! So, okay. So, come to me
after class to collect them. Okay?
And please try to avoid using
your phones during class.
Don't trouble him so much.
- Alright. Thank you, sir.
- Thank you, brother.
Hey, shall we go? Let's get it.
- Uh, you head. I'll get mine later.
- Okay.
I'll use the opportunity
to go to his house
because I 'forgot' to
collect it at the college.
- Wow!
Get it? - Of course.
Perfect.
He's at it today as well!
Sir, please check the app.
I've added another location.
Ma'am,
I can wait for only ten minutes.
Yes, that's okay.
Hi.
Hi!
Have a seat. - Sure.
Thanks. - You're welcome.
So - So?
I'm glad we decided to meet.
You are?
Every meeting
doesn't end in sex.
If not for work
But this, as per our last
conversation is just a date.
A no-sex date!
Yeah. How drunk was I
when I suggested that?
- I don't know.
We should first get our drinks
to get drunk here, I guess.
Sure.
Excuse me. - Excuse me.
Please stop here.
Give me two minutes.
Vasudha?
Oh,
I'm sorry. I'm busy with some housework.
Just two minutes. Okay?
'Good afternoon'
Yes.
Sorry about that.
Wait! Wait!
What are you doing? Huh?
I thought we
Eww! No!
What the hell is
wrong with you? Huh?
You've been sending me
such photos this whole week
even though I never responded!
And yet, you keep sending them!
Don't you like them?
Dick pics are gross, dude!
- Not all of these are mine.
- What?
Yes. Oh
I mean,
I downloaded some from the internet.
Oh God!
But why did you send them?
I'm sorry, Vasudha.
Actually,
I just got divorced after
ten years of marriage.
These apps, swiping
It's new to me.
I mean,
all these things are new to me.
So, these young guys from
my firm told me to do that.
Wow!
And
Anyway, dating in midlife
is very confusing for me.
But I swiped right on your
profile based on your face, right?
You have a decent face!
Lead with that!
Sorry, Vasudha.
I thought this is how
dating works these days.
And women like these pictures.
I thought meeting and
having a conversation
was outdated.
Listen,
I get it. Online dating is not easy.
And sometimes,
we wonder if the things we like,
does that even work nowadays?
But just be yourself.
This is just not cool, man.
I get it.
Sorry, once again.
It's okay.
Yes, Vasu. - Fatty,
there's an artist.
Sangram Seekar.
Nobody knows where he lives.
He's a recluse. Find
his whereabouts.
He will be the highlight
of Enso's exhibition.
I don't care if it
works presently or not.
I'm moving on from picking
dick pics for this exhibition.
Now, I'll follow my heart.
Look,
I'll be very honest with you.
You fascinate me.
I've never met a
girl like you before.
I don't know what it is about you
that just, that just draws me to you.
I hope this doesn't
freak you out or scare you
with all your open-minded
choices and thoughts.
- No, not at all.
How come?
Thank you. - Thank you.
Cheers!
What you feel about me,
how you feel about me
are your thoughts.
How and why
should I control them?
Thoughts and actions of
others should not influence yours.
Damn! I like you even more now!
That, my dear, is your problem.
Not mine.
Cheers. - Cheers to that.
Okay. It looks like four hours
on an interstate bus, and then
the rest of the journey
by local transport.
But who knows if
he's there or not?
Nobody has seen him in 15 years.
None of his paintings have been exhibited.
He's hiding somewhere.
You know,
like that perfect life partner.
How did you find this painting?
I found it when Kay was born.
It was a complicated pregnancy.
And this painting
was the only thing
that made me feel like maybe
everything's gonna be alright.
I wasn't able to say anything to
anyone. My feelings were repressed.
I don't know,
Sangram's painting
His fish flying in the sky
It really helped me.
It was whimsical and
profound at the same time.
Wow!
This painting made
everything alright!
I'll go and try to look
for him next week.
I don't know if
I'll find him or not.
But
Something tells me that
he's the one for this exhibition.
Anyway
If I don't find him,
then Enso's without a highlight.
I'm sure you'll find him.
I hope so.
Kay thinks my
jokes are very lame.
Teenagers!
You know,
I think every parent wishes
that their teenage kids would
be different from others' kids.
It doesn't happen.
Yeah, well,
you shouldn't be so worried.
Kay's a good kid.
Her enthusiasm levels are good.
You should be happy that
Yeah.
What happened?
Kay's your student.
You're her teacher.
So?
We're on a date.
Ah!
So, let's do one thing.
Let's not call this a date.
Let's not define it.
Will that be alright?
Let's finish this and
call for another round?
Okay. - Okay.
Welcome. - Thanks.
Make yourself comfortable.
What will you like to have?
- Some wine would be nice.
- Alright.
There you go. - Thanks.
Cheers! - Cheers!
You know,
you have a very sexy smile.
I wanted to say this when
we met at the college, but
So,
you were checking me out at the college!
Guilty as charged.
But you were no
different either.
Guilty as charged.
Okay, wait. Wait.
We shouldn't do this.
Right?
Yeah. We shouldn't.
Okay
Okay, wait. Wait, wait, wait.
Wait, wait, wait.
This This This
This is just so wrong.
Fuck!
- But it feels so good! Am I right?
- Yes.
Yeah. - Yeah.
Okay.
Hello?
What the Fuck?
What the Fuck?
Kay!
Kay!
Kay! Kay, wait!
Fuck off!
- What are you doing here?
- What are you doing here?
And you! You were supposed to Fuck me,
not her!
What?
What is she saying? - Wait
Kay! Kay,
you're my student! What are you saying?
Why did you give me so
much attention during training?
Why did you make that video
of me? What was all that?
Kay,
that's because you're a good runner!
You said you liked me.
I like you as a student.
But, Kay, you're a kid!
Fuck both of you.
Kay! No!
Kay!
Kay!
Ma, stop following me. I
don't want to talk to you.
- Please!
Please,
Kay! Don't just leave like that.
- Listen. Listen. Listen to me. Kay!
- I don't want to
Just Okay. I'm sorry. Listen.
I hate you.
Kay, please don't go like this.
Kay, please! Please! Kay! Kay!