Hope Springs s01e05 Episode Script
Episode 5
1 Breakfast.
Stay clear of the door.
Don't you give me that look.
We're trying to treat you as decent as we can.
And I'm sorry you're not going to make it to the wedding, but we had no choice.
That's my daughter getting married today.
And she thinks I've just abandoned her and gone to Australia! Sadie, if there was any other way Why should I believe a word you say? Thieves and liars, the whole bunch of you.
Believe what you like, we only took that money cos we need it to get away.
From the police, because you're escaped convicts.
No.
From my husband .
.
who'd kill us all given half the chance.
Look, when we're sorted, you can have the hotel back.
And when's that? LAUGHS UNEASILY Never.
You're going to keep me here until I die, or murder me first.
And then you'll have my money and my hotel! What's this, another one? Yeah.
This time, spell her name right.
If I'm missing Ann Marie so much, why aren't I at her wedding? HELP! Shoo! Give it ten then go fetch that card off Sadie, will you? Oh, and take her up a bottleof whisky, we need to keepher quiet today of all days.
I can't believe we've turned into screws.
What's happened to us? Everything was back on track.
Applying for our passports.
Heads down.
Safe.
And, all of a sudden, we're kidnappingpensioners, and catering for police chief's weddings.
Good times! Yeah, just take it through there, you can set up in the bar.
Hiya.
Oh, hi.
Just thought I'd better look in.
How's it going? Oh, it's good, yeah.
Hannah's right on top of it all in the kitchen and, er Oh, our bar man has finally arrived.
Got any news on hisbrother's SIM card?Any day now.
It's been giving me sleepless nights wondering about it.
Mm-hmm.
Er, it's not the only thing that's been keeping me awake, to be honest.
It's a big day, eh? No, the thing is, Ellie About what happened between us.
Hmm? You know, the kiss thing.
Thatdon't even think about it.
I just want to do the right thing, by everyone.
Oh, don't worry about me.
Worry? You come up and kiss me.
Hold on.
Me kiss you? Well, yeah.
Er, you kissed me! I wouldn't have.
You did! Well, you kissed me back.
I certainly didn't mean to.
Neither did I.
But it happened.
You just got the wrong end ofthe stick.
It's as simple as that.
I feel a rightDon't.
I'm flattered.
Friends? Yeah, friends.
BEEPING That'll be the potatoes.
Will you drain them off and toss them with the dressing, while they're still warm, please? Yes, chef.
Whooo!Whooo! Nice legs.
You're late.
All right, sorry, I overslept.
Funny that, so did Shoo.
Out on the razz, were you? We work hard enough, don't we, eh? Debatable.
Dean, that wine needs to be put in a cooler outside, please.
All right.
Catch you later, sexy boy.
You do know this little fling of yours will be a distant memory when we're in Barbados.
Eh?He doesn't even know who you are! Ellie.
What's your problem, mate? I'm just stressed.
You want to tell me what's going on? Don't you ever get lonely, Hans? Well, we've got each other.
You know what I mean.
Men are trouble, Ellie.
Exceptions to the rule are few and far between.
Tell me about it.
So, how come we give everything we've got to the bad ones, eh? And we mess the good ones about.
Oh, Ellie.
I mean, no letter, no phone call.
I can't believe she's ranoff without even telling me.
Look, it's not too late to call it off, you know.
Well, maybe we should, Doll.
I mean this bust up with your mum, it's not right.
No.
We're going ahead as planned.
Ann Marie, we need to talk.
You're not having second thoughts, are you? I just want to be sure that we're getting married for the right reasons.
Well, what better reason than him? You don't want him growing up without a dad like you did, do you? I meanI know.
But what about us? Gil, what are you talking about? We love each other, don't we? Yeah, of course, but Oh, dear God, Gil.
What have I done that's so wrong? First Mum, now you.
I mean, are you saying that the baby and I are going to be left all alone? Is that what you're saying? No, of course, no.
Calm down.
No, it'll be fine.
Because this is supposed to be the happiest day of my life.
And it will be.
For me too.
I'm justnervous, that's all.
I like Gil.
You know, I just I just like him.
He's become kind of like a, amate, you know? Well, there you are then.
I think you're mistaking "like" forsomething else, because you've not experienced that with a partner before.
I mean, you were attracted to Roy, thrilled by him, scared of him.
But you never liked him.
He's a mean, twisted, low down pig.
Anybody'd be better than Roy.
Et, voila! A starving woman will eat sand.
Oh, maybe you're right.
And if you truly do like Gil, well, you'll just want him to be happy.
Well, I do, obviously! Let's get back in there and give him the best wedding reception a man could wish for, and show him that he's married the right woman.
Well, I never said that.
What? She's a pain in the backside.
I know! But she's HIS pain in the backside.
And you're ours.
Thank you, doctor.
That'll be £3 million, please.
THEY LAUGH 36p, please.
Thank you.
Bye, bye.
Bye, bye.
Oh! Ronan not here yet? No.
Not yet.
But I need to get round to Ann Marie's.
Sorry I'm late.
See you later.
Right, you.
Today is an opportunity to do some groundwork.
That means you make it up with the McKenzie kid, and I get to play Mr Helpful with Cameron.
We're going to make sure everyone knows that we cannot wait for the result on that SIM card, because it'll prove who killed Katie.
We know who killed Katie.
Aye, but thanks to you, they cannae find him.
And God forbid they do.
Dad Are we not making this worse? I mean, what if I told the truth? What? If I told it right I didn't go through all this so you ruin us both.
Now that Sadie's out the picture, I just need to work on Ellie Williams and that place is ours.
We can clean up your mess and start again, OK? OK? OK.
Good boy.
You may as well have a seat, mate.
You'll be ages yet, brides are always late.
Least, they're supposed to be.
You look amazing.
So do you.
OK.
Are we all ready? 'I solemnly and sincerely declare that I,' Gil Alan Cameron, accept you, Ann Marie Louisa Cairncross, as my lawful wife, to the exclusion of all others.
'I solemnly and sincerely declare 'that I, Ann Marie Louisa Cairncross,' accept you, Gil Alan Cameron, as my lawful husband, to theexclusion of all others.
Oi! Shoo! You may kiss your bride.
Hello.
Hello, welcome.
Welcome to Hope Springs.
Hello.
Thanks, guys, for doing all this, even though Mum's not here.
It's our pleasure, and, may I say, you look fantastic.
Oh, thanks very much.
Well, I was hoping not to beshowing quite so much, but, you know.
It just makes you the perfect threesome, instead of a couple.
Gil Ellie was saying whata perfect threesome we make.
Eh? She, he, and baby makes three! Oh! Right, eh, absolutely.
Come on, we should mingle.
You're overdoing it, darling.
I'm just trying to be nice.
Stand away from the door.
Sadie? Agghh! Gimme that, you nutter.
I should bash your head inwith this! What do you expect? I'm climbing the walls in here.
Well .
.
You know, you can't say we're not feeding you good, anyway.
It's better than I ever got when they locked me up in my foster home.
You probably deserved it.
What? A six-year-old kid getting hit and kicked? I don't think so, Mate.
I might have given you the money if you'd just asked.
It weren't me that stole it off you, anyway.
Oh, no, I know it wasn't your fault.
I know that.
You're just a sick wee lassie yourself.
What do you mean, "sick"? No' right in the head.
And why would you be? A deprived childhood, a life of crime, and then Ellie and hercronies brainwashing you into doing even worse.
Nobody's brainwashed me.
You're damaged, Shoo.
And any court would see that, and they'd want help you, not punish you, if you did the right thing now.
Oh, you're at it! You're trying to split us up.
You don't know what we've been through.
That's how we'll stick, through thick and thin.
At my expense! And Dean's.
Does he know his girlfriend is a hardened criminal? I'm not hardened! Oh, and what would you call it, then? Lying, cheating innocent trusting people for your own evil gain? Dean's being played for a fool, just like me.
Just you leave Dean out of this, all right? No, don't hurt me! Hey.
What's up? Dean, we need to talk.
And I just don't want one of your daft waitresses cutting into it, because the top tier's kept for the christening.
Oh.
It's nice to keep some things traditional, eh? Er, I'll put it away safe for you.
I hope your hands are clean.
Clean as a whistle.
It's a free bar, you knob.
You don't have to steal it.
I wasn't.
I was just taking it over to a table.
Why,you wanna get all GI Jane again? Don't push it, mate.
Get over yourself.
You haven't got your great big shovel with you.
I don't need a shovel to beat a wimp like you.
Yeah? You wanna bet? All right.
You're on.
What would you say if I told you that, that I got sent to borstal one time for, like, nickingand stuff? I'd say well done for getting out of it! For God's sake, my dad's still in the nick.
And if you think Borstal was bad, you wanna see Barlinnie.
Yeah, but my point is that I'm not really who I said I was, am I? And I don't want to hurt you, Dean, soso, you know, maybe it's best if we just Are you kidding? You being honest like this just makes me love you even more.
You love me? Aye.
I love you.
Well, er, nobody's ever really said that to me before.
Y'know, notand meant it.
Marry me, Shoo? No, II can't! Why not? Look, you've never had a proper family before, and mine's all to hell, so let's make one of our own, starting with you and me.
Go on, give me one good reason why not.
Aye, that's it, Son, make me proud, eh(?) Stupid boy.
Come on, Ronan.
Come on! That's it, son.
That's it.
Fair play.
You reckon?Definitely.
You made a bit of a meal of it, though, eh? She's only a lassie, for goodness sake.
She's strong, mind.
Never met a lassie so strong.
Not strong enough, though, eh? I owe you a drink.
No, mate.
Winner buys.
I owe you one.
Eh, you know, I think maybe you'd better take charge of this.
I'd hate to mess up your christening.
Well, you carry on as well as you have today and wemight let you cater it.
Gil! Christening cake.
Stickit in the boot, will you? You don't havechildren, do you, Ellie? No.
No.
I suppose it's abit late for you now.
Ann Marie! Oh, I've got Shoo and Josie to keep me busy.
You had too much Buck's Fizz? It's just girls' talk, darling.
At what point can I stop being nice? On the plane? Ellie! Lovely party.
Oh, gotta love a wedding.
Listen, I'd have thought I'd have heard from you by now about my offer.
You said you'd think about it.
Yeah, right.
It's a no, I'm afraid.
Oh! Only, now Sadie's gone walkabout, there'd be no sitting tenant.
I could up my price.
Oh, she's on holiday.
She'll be coming back.
Maybe she'd change her mind if you sold the place while she was away, if you get my meaning Wouldn't that be illegal? Well, if she'd no intention of Look, I said no.
Sadie's coming back, and And when she does, she's coming back here.
Excuse me.
Oh! Oh, commiserations.
I heard the Edinburgh house fell through.
Yeah, well, obviously Mum didn't want to help us out.
Well, she's not your only port of call, y'know.
I've told you that.
I don't want your money, Euan.
Look, if you could persuade your mum that staying in Australia really would be the best thing for her I don't even have anaddress for her, Euan.
She's not speaking to me, so I hardly think she's gonna take my advice.
Well, you could find out, surely.
I don't want to.
Did you not have a scan recently? Starting to look like me yet? This baby's Gil's.
Time will tell.
# Oh and your sweet and pretty face # Just such an ugly way Something so beautiful Hannah! You won't believe what I just heard.
I know, she knows I knew she was a piece of work.
Look, from what you were saying, she doesn't seem very happy about it.
I'd say she considered it an error.
Yeah.
She'd be bang on! I'm gonna tell him.
Don't be ridiculous! We'd blow two marriages out of the water and make even more enemies for ourselves.
Gil has a right to know.
Oh, you don't know the history behind it.
For God's sakes, this isabout you, not Gil, so grow up.
Look, we're gonna be away from here soon, and Gil is gonna have to get on with his life one way or another.
So unless you think it's truly in his best interests, keep your mouth shut.
I just wanna save him the heartache.
Who would you be saving, Ellie? You or him? I hate it when you're right.
No wonder you're always so grumpy.
Who's grumpy? Well, me and Shoo's gonna put a smile on your face.
Da-da!We're engaged! I mean, aye, I know we're young.
But when you know, you know.
Know what I mean? That's marvellous news, but can you save the celebrations? You're supposed to be servingdrinks at someone else's wedding at the moment.
Aye, fair dos.
OK, I know.
But, hear me out.
Hear you out about what? Let's give Hannah a hand in the kitchen.
He asked me, with an engagement ring an' everything.
What else was I supposed to do? Say no.
But that would look suspicious, wouldn't it? I mean, obviously I'm not gonna go through with it, am I? You can't go through with it.
You don't have a legal identity! They could have some sort of, like, Druid ceremony or whatever, y'know, both adopt woodland names? Oh, yeah, right, she'll live happily ever after off berries(!) I dunno why you're being so mean.
I mean, of course I'm gonna go to Barbados with you lot.
I just got excited, that's all.
Y'know, I mean, no-one's ever asked me to marry them before.
Yeah! Oh, congratulations, babes.
I suppose he's a hell of a lot nicer than some of those pimps you used to go for.
So long as you understand it won't actually happen.
Yeah, I mean, I'm just pretending, aren't I? Eh? It's all part of the cover.
Right.
Well, good.
And speaking of covers Call it an engagement watch instead of a ring, yeah? It's brilliant, babe.
Looks well expensive.
Well, yeah, I mean, I found it in the caravan a while back.
But I would've paid for it if I had to.
I'll wear it on our wedding.
'Allo, Ells.
Long time no see.
You start blowing anybody's brains out, you've had it.
This is a policeman's wedding.
Oh, bonus.
I always get a gold star when I take out a cop.
Where is he? Right, pack it in.
Come to think of it, where's your mates? Y'know,Hannah, Josie and little Shanice.
Or Shoo,as I think you like to call her.
I got a bone to pick with them an' all.
What d'you want, Marius? Now what in the wide, wide world of sport do you think I want? It's not that simple right now.
No? Look we don't need to involve anyone else in this.
It's just you've picked a bad day.
Oh, listen, sweets, I don't particularly wanna interrupt the party, but I got a schedule to keep to.
So why don't you just take me to the money and we can catch up on old times on the way? OK.
It's this way.
Gil! Sorry, this is Marius.
He's my ex.
Babes, this is Gil.
He's the groom.
Marius.
Her ex.
But I'm working on it.
That's why I came up here.
Is this the guy that battered you? Eryeah, but that was a long time ago.
Yeah.
Done anger management.
Yeah? Did it work? No offence, mate, but that's none of your business.
It is if you're planning on assaulting her.
I'm a police officer.
How did you find her, anyway? Seriously, Gil, I asked him to come up.
I called him.
I'd heard he'd gotten some help and I needed to see him, talk to him.
I'm fine, honest.
You don't need to worry about me.
Can we get some privacy, babes? Can I talk to you alone for a moment? Get rid, or things are gonna start happening quickly andI'm gonna get my gold star.
Back off, Gil.
When you told me about him, you were scared.
Am I to believe I don't care what you believe.
People can change.
At least he didn't go round propositioning other women on his wedding day.
I don't care what you say, I'm not leaving you alone with him.
I have a duty as a policeman to look out for you.
Ellie? Well, why don't you look out for your wife instead? She's inside.
She's the pregnant one in the wedding dress.
I know who my wife is.
Let's bring him with, Ells.
Then we can show him how palsy we are now.
Well, maybe you know who yourwife is, but do you know who the father of the baby is? No? Well, from what I hear, neither does Ann Marie.
You are a piece of work.
Maybe Ann Marie was right.
You're jealous.
Don't believe me, why don't you go ask her? It's not my life you need to sort out, Gil, it's your own.
Get him, eh? Where's Ann Marie? How the hellwould Ellie know sod all about me? Is it true?She'd say anything to split us up.
You know that.
Trust you to Just answer the question.
I'm not answering to Ellie bloody Williams.
Answer to me! Get away from me! Is it my baby? Yes, of course! So, you won't mind doing a DNA test when it's born, then? Who? Here, where did you get that watch? Shoo gave it me.
Well, it looks very like the one I gave Euan for his 40th.
Are you calling my fiancee a thief? WellCalm it, Ina.
I lost that watch down on the golf course weeks before these lassies even arrived.
Oh, I'm sorry.
It was my mistake.
Mm.
Our wedding was a sham, you standing there saying, "To the exclusion of all others," while you're carrying someone else's child.
No, wait!And him, of all people! Why? I went to see him about Mum's will, a few months ago.
Oh, I think we can be more precise than that, huh? Let's call it six.
He offered me a drink and then another.
And he flattered me, and Oh, spare me the details! It's not just your fault, it's mine too.
I don't love you, Ann Marie.
I thought I did, but I don't.
Don't.
Don't say that! It'll never happen again! But it's just a symptom, isn't it? I mean, we have to ask ourselves why you slept with him if things were OK with us.
I was drunk! I love you so much! No, you don't.
You love my job and the fact that you think it'll take you to Edinburgh.
But I can't do it, for both our sakes.
I'm sorry.
I've been saving anyway, and soon I could get us booked in at Gretna Green.
What's that?Tradition, isn't it? It's where you go to get a quickie wedding.
It's dead romantic.
We just need to get a licence and we could be married in months.
Ooh! Erm, have you seen Ellie?What? Er, no, no.
Maybe she's having a quick tea break or something.
I'm sure she'll show up.
So where's the three mill? I mean, if you hand it over nice, Roy might think about not chopping your rather shapely legs off.
Roy can go stuff himself.
I earned that money.
I did five years for the rottenpig, and the whole time he'sgot a mistress and a kid.
Yeah.
Spare us the sob story, Elle.
Just show us the loot.
Come on, Marius.
One for the road? You brought me down here for a bit of slap and tickle? Just give us the money, will you? What, so you can give it to Roy and he can spend it on his slag? No, thanks.
Pull the trigger.
Don't piss about.
I'm serious.
After all he's put me through, I'd rather die rich.
I can't believe you're not sick of him yourself.
I mean, think about it.
We're both better off with Roy locked away.
Andwe could be a whole lot better off.
Don't you reckon? You wanna make me have to work it out of you? Eh? Cos you know I will if I have to.
God, Marius.
Look, what I'm saying iswe could team up, y'know, split the loot.
Sod Roy.
We could go somewherenice, somewhere sunny, have a bit of fun for once.
Yeah? And what about your sidekicks? Oh, the girls? They're just baggage.
I mean, they're nice, but they're dim.
Come on, Marius, I've seen the way you look at me.
Sadie, I've got some cake for you.
Holy £50 says you throw up first.
Dunno, mate.
I'm supposed to be working.
Yeah, right.
Now who looks scared? Follow me.
Look, is Ellie up here? No, and neither's bloody Sadie! What are you on about? See for yourself.
She's escaped! Oh, my good God! I know! Oh, you're joking me! KNOCKS Right, everyone, listen up.
You might as well all go home, because the wedding, the wedding's over.
My mum .
.
My mum's lucky she's not here to witness the mess her daughter's made of her life.
Seems Gil's changed his mind.
And who can blame him, eh? You've gotnothing more to threaten me with, Euan, because he knows.
Knows what, Euan? Euan, what's happening? Harries, a word.
I'll sort this out.
Gil, I can explain everything.
Ladies and gentlemen, I think, under the circumstances, we'd better call it a day.
I don't know what she told you, but it's not true.
She lying to you, I swear.
You just had to have what I've got.
You always did.
We were drunk.
Aye, but it was just a one-off.
Don't call this whole thing off on my account.
Don't flatter yourself.
Have you completely lost your mind? I think maybe I've just found it.
Do you want to tell her, or shall I? Empty.
It's a draw.
You're OK, y'know? I like you.
Hmm!! Well, I guess you're not such a bad guy, either.
I'm worse than bad.
You wish.
I am.
I've done things, more than you can imagine.
I reckon we all got secrets, mate.
No.
I'm going to hell, for sure.
You know what? I don't care.
Cos nothing can be worse than round my house.
What d'you mean? Get off, you moron.
I'm gay.
Typical.
The wedding's off, everyone's going home and we've got a major problem.
Sadie's only gone and jumped out the window.
Listen to me.
How could you? This is a personal matter, Rita.
It was a drunken, stupid mistake, that's all.
Leave them.
Leave them to it, doll.
What've you done to Mum? It's what I'm going to do to you, you should be worried about, you flaming liability.
Get! Bit of a scandal, eh? Oh, you gotta go, Dean.
I'll catch you tomorrow.
Well, my shift's not over till 12, we've got all that to clear up.
I said go home! What the hell is wrong with you? This is about us getting engaged, isn't it? Yeah, because, if Ann Marie and Gil can't make it, and they've known each other for yearsDon't be stupid.
Oh, right, so I'm stupid now, am I? No, I was just saying Look, let's just forget it.
Y'know, you can take your flippin' ring.
Now, go on, get lost.
Y'know what? I will, then.
Tell Ellie to stuff her crap job.
I'm sick of it.
I'm sick of the lot of you.
When I find you, Sadie Oh, tell Ellie thanks for the info.
Really made my day.
She overheard them, Gil.
She was only trying to help.
Oh, sure(!) Well, I hope I'm in a position to help her and her ex out some time.
Her ex? Mr Anger Management.
Marius.
Oh, didn't you know? No, they're having a loving reunion.
Imagine my old man could see us now.
Ha-ha, yeah, I am.
It's sweet.
Be a whole lot sweeter in my bedroom.
Why don't we carry on up there? Is that where the three mill's stashed? You don't think I'd keep it down here, do you, with all the booze, and the staff in and out whenever they like? C'mon.
There's a wedding going on.
No one'll bother us.
Let 'em.
I'll bother 'em back.
I'm good at that, as you well know.
Take a bottle, shall we? Yeah, I'll have that.
You still don't trust me.
Oh, I rate you, though, Elle.
Takes some neck to rob off Roy Lagden.
What I don't get is what you're doing in a crappy dump in Scotland.
Just taking a breather till I get shot of the girls.
OK, thanks.
Bye! Josie! Any sign of Sadie yet? Josie, we've got an even bigger problem.
Seriously, we're gonna have a right laugh, you and me.
Ah! Sadie? D'you really think I bought any of that guff? So you ARE Roy's little gun dog? No, sweetheart.
But you're right about one thing.
I am well sick of him.
Working for meself now.
So I never told Roy I was coming up here.
As far as he's concerned, I'm still hunting a trail down South.
I'm gonna take the lot, Elle.
Except, unlike you, I ain't gonna leave any clues.
Come here, you evil old bag! Don't even think about it.
What are we gonna do? Find him.
Here! It's Sadie! Get me out of here! BANGING Aaaah! Get her! One for luck.
Ladies? What a shower.
Let them go.
I'll show you where the money is.
Yeah, all right.
Joke(!) Upstairs.
And if you take me for a mug, I'm gonna come down here and start picking 'em off one by one.
Bedroom, is it? Office, actually.
I must be losing my touch.
Come.
I suppose she's gonna try and give him Sadie's money.
Huh, well, it's a little short of three million! Yes, thank you, Sadie.
We know that.
Maybe if I explained I mean, he's not going to kill a civilian, is he? No, Sadie, you don't understand.
He's a hitman.
He's not gonna leave any witnesses.
He's going to take your money, shoot Ellie and then come back down for us.
Oh, God.
I'm so sorry, Sadie.
We never meant for you to get involved.
It's a bit late for that.
We only wanted to go straight, to make it to Barbados.
Barbados, is it? You were going to rob me blind, leave me with postschematicstress syndrome and thenjaunt off to Barbados? Well, it's not going to happen, because we're all going to DIE! No! Look, Sadie's right.
It's not on.
We gotta get her out of 'ere.
Get on with it.
Run, Sadie.
Tell Dean I'd marry him if I could.
Well, tell him yourself.
Pass that barrel.
We can all get out.
Go, go! Ah! You are beginning to piss me right off! You're too late, darling.
That's the last of it.
The three mill's gone.
You're lying.
We had a fire.
It got burnt.
The whole sodding lot.
Nah, I don't buy that.
Well, it's the truth, you loser.
Bye-bye.
Aaaah! GUNSHOT AND SCREAMING Ellie! Oh, God.
OK.
OK, erm, we'll rush him.
FLOORBOARDS SQUEAK I think Ellie's fainted.
I suppose he is dead, is he? Oh, I'd put a spot of filler in that, dear.
The gun went off when he raised his arm.
Just missed my head by a whisker.
Ithink she's in shock.
I don't think she's the only one, Sade.
Oh! Well, that's me, then.
A murderer.
Well, it was self-defence! You saved Ellie's life, babes.
You're a hero! Heroine.
She saved all our lives.
He was going to get away with my money.
Well, I suppose it's all my fault for burning the rest.
No, it isn't.
You didn't know.
And after all we did to you I don't know how to say thank you.
I do.
You can buy me a drink.
By the side of the pool.
In Barbados.
Otherwise it's not going to look toogood to the police, is it? You've thieved from me, lied, kidnapped, and me, a74-year-old woman.
They'll lock you up and throw away the key.
And you! You said yourself that you're a murderer.
And you said it was self-defence.
I'm a hero, remember? Heroine.
No, I could walk out of here now andget Gil Cameron.
Unless you're planning to lock me up upstairs again? Actually, Gil probably won't be in the mood.
He and Ann Marie have decided to call it all off.
Eh? Seems the baby might be Euan's.
Euan Harries?! Gil found out.
Euan Harries and Ann Marie all this time, and both of them trying to get me out ofhere? What the hell's been going on? D'you still want to come with us? Oh, what, and leave all this, a falling-down hotel to run on my own again, being hounded out by a bunch of bloodsuckers? I'll die within the year, probably of boredom.
Let's face it, they weren't called the Famous Four.
But first off, we've got to get rid of him.
Keep the gun.
Gun.
Where did I put his car keys? Keys.
Oh.
OK.
We're gonna put his body in the boot of his car.
With his arm.
Arm.
Josie, you and the girls drive his car to the loch.
I'll follow behind in the jeep.
We'll keep Sadie herecos she's been through the mill.
Sadie?Mill.
Oh, for Christ's sake, stop fannying about.
Let's get on with it.
PHONE RINGS It's his mobile.
Sadie, throw this in the fire.
Fire.
Where the hell are you, Marius? You don't call me back pronto, you're a dead man.
Let's go home.
I'm afraid that's the lot.
£1,100? That's all that's left of my £200,000? We could check again in the morning, but it's pretty windy out there.
Can you give it a rest with the scrubbing? Have you ever heard of MRSA? No.
I think we've got bigger problems than germs, Hannah.
Thank you for reminding me, I'd forgotten(!) I take it none of you are murderers by trade yourselves? Not for want of trying.
No, Sadie, this is a first for all of us.
Well, that's a relief.
If I'm going to tag along, I want to feel safe in my bed when we get to foreign climes.
Well, we won't get very far, will we, if that's all that's left in the flamin' pot? Not to mention we still haven't got our passports.
You've got no passports? Well, we can't exactly use our old ones, can we? Hmm.
Why don't you get fake ones? Well, we kind of lost our contacts when we went on the run.
Unless, of course, you know a suitable forger.
No.
But I know a man who does.
Lithuanian.
Runs the fish-filleting factory at Inversnedden.
Mo buys from him.
Gets me knock-off liquor when funds are tight.
He's sorted out all his immigrant workers with ID.
Bit of a hard case, you know, but I suppose that goes with the job.
Sorry .
.
YOU, you can get us fake passports? If you'd just asked when you first got here Told you I'd pull my weight.
Cheers, girls.
Here's to Barbados! Cheers!Cheers!
Stay clear of the door.
Don't you give me that look.
We're trying to treat you as decent as we can.
And I'm sorry you're not going to make it to the wedding, but we had no choice.
That's my daughter getting married today.
And she thinks I've just abandoned her and gone to Australia! Sadie, if there was any other way Why should I believe a word you say? Thieves and liars, the whole bunch of you.
Believe what you like, we only took that money cos we need it to get away.
From the police, because you're escaped convicts.
No.
From my husband .
.
who'd kill us all given half the chance.
Look, when we're sorted, you can have the hotel back.
And when's that? LAUGHS UNEASILY Never.
You're going to keep me here until I die, or murder me first.
And then you'll have my money and my hotel! What's this, another one? Yeah.
This time, spell her name right.
If I'm missing Ann Marie so much, why aren't I at her wedding? HELP! Shoo! Give it ten then go fetch that card off Sadie, will you? Oh, and take her up a bottleof whisky, we need to keepher quiet today of all days.
I can't believe we've turned into screws.
What's happened to us? Everything was back on track.
Applying for our passports.
Heads down.
Safe.
And, all of a sudden, we're kidnappingpensioners, and catering for police chief's weddings.
Good times! Yeah, just take it through there, you can set up in the bar.
Hiya.
Oh, hi.
Just thought I'd better look in.
How's it going? Oh, it's good, yeah.
Hannah's right on top of it all in the kitchen and, er Oh, our bar man has finally arrived.
Got any news on hisbrother's SIM card?Any day now.
It's been giving me sleepless nights wondering about it.
Mm-hmm.
Er, it's not the only thing that's been keeping me awake, to be honest.
It's a big day, eh? No, the thing is, Ellie About what happened between us.
Hmm? You know, the kiss thing.
Thatdon't even think about it.
I just want to do the right thing, by everyone.
Oh, don't worry about me.
Worry? You come up and kiss me.
Hold on.
Me kiss you? Well, yeah.
Er, you kissed me! I wouldn't have.
You did! Well, you kissed me back.
I certainly didn't mean to.
Neither did I.
But it happened.
You just got the wrong end ofthe stick.
It's as simple as that.
I feel a rightDon't.
I'm flattered.
Friends? Yeah, friends.
BEEPING That'll be the potatoes.
Will you drain them off and toss them with the dressing, while they're still warm, please? Yes, chef.
Whooo!Whooo! Nice legs.
You're late.
All right, sorry, I overslept.
Funny that, so did Shoo.
Out on the razz, were you? We work hard enough, don't we, eh? Debatable.
Dean, that wine needs to be put in a cooler outside, please.
All right.
Catch you later, sexy boy.
You do know this little fling of yours will be a distant memory when we're in Barbados.
Eh?He doesn't even know who you are! Ellie.
What's your problem, mate? I'm just stressed.
You want to tell me what's going on? Don't you ever get lonely, Hans? Well, we've got each other.
You know what I mean.
Men are trouble, Ellie.
Exceptions to the rule are few and far between.
Tell me about it.
So, how come we give everything we've got to the bad ones, eh? And we mess the good ones about.
Oh, Ellie.
I mean, no letter, no phone call.
I can't believe she's ranoff without even telling me.
Look, it's not too late to call it off, you know.
Well, maybe we should, Doll.
I mean this bust up with your mum, it's not right.
No.
We're going ahead as planned.
Ann Marie, we need to talk.
You're not having second thoughts, are you? I just want to be sure that we're getting married for the right reasons.
Well, what better reason than him? You don't want him growing up without a dad like you did, do you? I meanI know.
But what about us? Gil, what are you talking about? We love each other, don't we? Yeah, of course, but Oh, dear God, Gil.
What have I done that's so wrong? First Mum, now you.
I mean, are you saying that the baby and I are going to be left all alone? Is that what you're saying? No, of course, no.
Calm down.
No, it'll be fine.
Because this is supposed to be the happiest day of my life.
And it will be.
For me too.
I'm justnervous, that's all.
I like Gil.
You know, I just I just like him.
He's become kind of like a, amate, you know? Well, there you are then.
I think you're mistaking "like" forsomething else, because you've not experienced that with a partner before.
I mean, you were attracted to Roy, thrilled by him, scared of him.
But you never liked him.
He's a mean, twisted, low down pig.
Anybody'd be better than Roy.
Et, voila! A starving woman will eat sand.
Oh, maybe you're right.
And if you truly do like Gil, well, you'll just want him to be happy.
Well, I do, obviously! Let's get back in there and give him the best wedding reception a man could wish for, and show him that he's married the right woman.
Well, I never said that.
What? She's a pain in the backside.
I know! But she's HIS pain in the backside.
And you're ours.
Thank you, doctor.
That'll be £3 million, please.
THEY LAUGH 36p, please.
Thank you.
Bye, bye.
Bye, bye.
Oh! Ronan not here yet? No.
Not yet.
But I need to get round to Ann Marie's.
Sorry I'm late.
See you later.
Right, you.
Today is an opportunity to do some groundwork.
That means you make it up with the McKenzie kid, and I get to play Mr Helpful with Cameron.
We're going to make sure everyone knows that we cannot wait for the result on that SIM card, because it'll prove who killed Katie.
We know who killed Katie.
Aye, but thanks to you, they cannae find him.
And God forbid they do.
Dad Are we not making this worse? I mean, what if I told the truth? What? If I told it right I didn't go through all this so you ruin us both.
Now that Sadie's out the picture, I just need to work on Ellie Williams and that place is ours.
We can clean up your mess and start again, OK? OK? OK.
Good boy.
You may as well have a seat, mate.
You'll be ages yet, brides are always late.
Least, they're supposed to be.
You look amazing.
So do you.
OK.
Are we all ready? 'I solemnly and sincerely declare that I,' Gil Alan Cameron, accept you, Ann Marie Louisa Cairncross, as my lawful wife, to the exclusion of all others.
'I solemnly and sincerely declare 'that I, Ann Marie Louisa Cairncross,' accept you, Gil Alan Cameron, as my lawful husband, to theexclusion of all others.
Oi! Shoo! You may kiss your bride.
Hello.
Hello, welcome.
Welcome to Hope Springs.
Hello.
Thanks, guys, for doing all this, even though Mum's not here.
It's our pleasure, and, may I say, you look fantastic.
Oh, thanks very much.
Well, I was hoping not to beshowing quite so much, but, you know.
It just makes you the perfect threesome, instead of a couple.
Gil Ellie was saying whata perfect threesome we make.
Eh? She, he, and baby makes three! Oh! Right, eh, absolutely.
Come on, we should mingle.
You're overdoing it, darling.
I'm just trying to be nice.
Stand away from the door.
Sadie? Agghh! Gimme that, you nutter.
I should bash your head inwith this! What do you expect? I'm climbing the walls in here.
Well .
.
You know, you can't say we're not feeding you good, anyway.
It's better than I ever got when they locked me up in my foster home.
You probably deserved it.
What? A six-year-old kid getting hit and kicked? I don't think so, Mate.
I might have given you the money if you'd just asked.
It weren't me that stole it off you, anyway.
Oh, no, I know it wasn't your fault.
I know that.
You're just a sick wee lassie yourself.
What do you mean, "sick"? No' right in the head.
And why would you be? A deprived childhood, a life of crime, and then Ellie and hercronies brainwashing you into doing even worse.
Nobody's brainwashed me.
You're damaged, Shoo.
And any court would see that, and they'd want help you, not punish you, if you did the right thing now.
Oh, you're at it! You're trying to split us up.
You don't know what we've been through.
That's how we'll stick, through thick and thin.
At my expense! And Dean's.
Does he know his girlfriend is a hardened criminal? I'm not hardened! Oh, and what would you call it, then? Lying, cheating innocent trusting people for your own evil gain? Dean's being played for a fool, just like me.
Just you leave Dean out of this, all right? No, don't hurt me! Hey.
What's up? Dean, we need to talk.
And I just don't want one of your daft waitresses cutting into it, because the top tier's kept for the christening.
Oh.
It's nice to keep some things traditional, eh? Er, I'll put it away safe for you.
I hope your hands are clean.
Clean as a whistle.
It's a free bar, you knob.
You don't have to steal it.
I wasn't.
I was just taking it over to a table.
Why,you wanna get all GI Jane again? Don't push it, mate.
Get over yourself.
You haven't got your great big shovel with you.
I don't need a shovel to beat a wimp like you.
Yeah? You wanna bet? All right.
You're on.
What would you say if I told you that, that I got sent to borstal one time for, like, nickingand stuff? I'd say well done for getting out of it! For God's sake, my dad's still in the nick.
And if you think Borstal was bad, you wanna see Barlinnie.
Yeah, but my point is that I'm not really who I said I was, am I? And I don't want to hurt you, Dean, soso, you know, maybe it's best if we just Are you kidding? You being honest like this just makes me love you even more.
You love me? Aye.
I love you.
Well, er, nobody's ever really said that to me before.
Y'know, notand meant it.
Marry me, Shoo? No, II can't! Why not? Look, you've never had a proper family before, and mine's all to hell, so let's make one of our own, starting with you and me.
Go on, give me one good reason why not.
Aye, that's it, Son, make me proud, eh(?) Stupid boy.
Come on, Ronan.
Come on! That's it, son.
That's it.
Fair play.
You reckon?Definitely.
You made a bit of a meal of it, though, eh? She's only a lassie, for goodness sake.
She's strong, mind.
Never met a lassie so strong.
Not strong enough, though, eh? I owe you a drink.
No, mate.
Winner buys.
I owe you one.
Eh, you know, I think maybe you'd better take charge of this.
I'd hate to mess up your christening.
Well, you carry on as well as you have today and wemight let you cater it.
Gil! Christening cake.
Stickit in the boot, will you? You don't havechildren, do you, Ellie? No.
No.
I suppose it's abit late for you now.
Ann Marie! Oh, I've got Shoo and Josie to keep me busy.
You had too much Buck's Fizz? It's just girls' talk, darling.
At what point can I stop being nice? On the plane? Ellie! Lovely party.
Oh, gotta love a wedding.
Listen, I'd have thought I'd have heard from you by now about my offer.
You said you'd think about it.
Yeah, right.
It's a no, I'm afraid.
Oh! Only, now Sadie's gone walkabout, there'd be no sitting tenant.
I could up my price.
Oh, she's on holiday.
She'll be coming back.
Maybe she'd change her mind if you sold the place while she was away, if you get my meaning Wouldn't that be illegal? Well, if she'd no intention of Look, I said no.
Sadie's coming back, and And when she does, she's coming back here.
Excuse me.
Oh! Oh, commiserations.
I heard the Edinburgh house fell through.
Yeah, well, obviously Mum didn't want to help us out.
Well, she's not your only port of call, y'know.
I've told you that.
I don't want your money, Euan.
Look, if you could persuade your mum that staying in Australia really would be the best thing for her I don't even have anaddress for her, Euan.
She's not speaking to me, so I hardly think she's gonna take my advice.
Well, you could find out, surely.
I don't want to.
Did you not have a scan recently? Starting to look like me yet? This baby's Gil's.
Time will tell.
# Oh and your sweet and pretty face # Just such an ugly way Something so beautiful Hannah! You won't believe what I just heard.
I know, she knows I knew she was a piece of work.
Look, from what you were saying, she doesn't seem very happy about it.
I'd say she considered it an error.
Yeah.
She'd be bang on! I'm gonna tell him.
Don't be ridiculous! We'd blow two marriages out of the water and make even more enemies for ourselves.
Gil has a right to know.
Oh, you don't know the history behind it.
For God's sakes, this isabout you, not Gil, so grow up.
Look, we're gonna be away from here soon, and Gil is gonna have to get on with his life one way or another.
So unless you think it's truly in his best interests, keep your mouth shut.
I just wanna save him the heartache.
Who would you be saving, Ellie? You or him? I hate it when you're right.
No wonder you're always so grumpy.
Who's grumpy? Well, me and Shoo's gonna put a smile on your face.
Da-da!We're engaged! I mean, aye, I know we're young.
But when you know, you know.
Know what I mean? That's marvellous news, but can you save the celebrations? You're supposed to be servingdrinks at someone else's wedding at the moment.
Aye, fair dos.
OK, I know.
But, hear me out.
Hear you out about what? Let's give Hannah a hand in the kitchen.
He asked me, with an engagement ring an' everything.
What else was I supposed to do? Say no.
But that would look suspicious, wouldn't it? I mean, obviously I'm not gonna go through with it, am I? You can't go through with it.
You don't have a legal identity! They could have some sort of, like, Druid ceremony or whatever, y'know, both adopt woodland names? Oh, yeah, right, she'll live happily ever after off berries(!) I dunno why you're being so mean.
I mean, of course I'm gonna go to Barbados with you lot.
I just got excited, that's all.
Y'know, I mean, no-one's ever asked me to marry them before.
Yeah! Oh, congratulations, babes.
I suppose he's a hell of a lot nicer than some of those pimps you used to go for.
So long as you understand it won't actually happen.
Yeah, I mean, I'm just pretending, aren't I? Eh? It's all part of the cover.
Right.
Well, good.
And speaking of covers Call it an engagement watch instead of a ring, yeah? It's brilliant, babe.
Looks well expensive.
Well, yeah, I mean, I found it in the caravan a while back.
But I would've paid for it if I had to.
I'll wear it on our wedding.
'Allo, Ells.
Long time no see.
You start blowing anybody's brains out, you've had it.
This is a policeman's wedding.
Oh, bonus.
I always get a gold star when I take out a cop.
Where is he? Right, pack it in.
Come to think of it, where's your mates? Y'know,Hannah, Josie and little Shanice.
Or Shoo,as I think you like to call her.
I got a bone to pick with them an' all.
What d'you want, Marius? Now what in the wide, wide world of sport do you think I want? It's not that simple right now.
No? Look we don't need to involve anyone else in this.
It's just you've picked a bad day.
Oh, listen, sweets, I don't particularly wanna interrupt the party, but I got a schedule to keep to.
So why don't you just take me to the money and we can catch up on old times on the way? OK.
It's this way.
Gil! Sorry, this is Marius.
He's my ex.
Babes, this is Gil.
He's the groom.
Marius.
Her ex.
But I'm working on it.
That's why I came up here.
Is this the guy that battered you? Eryeah, but that was a long time ago.
Yeah.
Done anger management.
Yeah? Did it work? No offence, mate, but that's none of your business.
It is if you're planning on assaulting her.
I'm a police officer.
How did you find her, anyway? Seriously, Gil, I asked him to come up.
I called him.
I'd heard he'd gotten some help and I needed to see him, talk to him.
I'm fine, honest.
You don't need to worry about me.
Can we get some privacy, babes? Can I talk to you alone for a moment? Get rid, or things are gonna start happening quickly andI'm gonna get my gold star.
Back off, Gil.
When you told me about him, you were scared.
Am I to believe I don't care what you believe.
People can change.
At least he didn't go round propositioning other women on his wedding day.
I don't care what you say, I'm not leaving you alone with him.
I have a duty as a policeman to look out for you.
Ellie? Well, why don't you look out for your wife instead? She's inside.
She's the pregnant one in the wedding dress.
I know who my wife is.
Let's bring him with, Ells.
Then we can show him how palsy we are now.
Well, maybe you know who yourwife is, but do you know who the father of the baby is? No? Well, from what I hear, neither does Ann Marie.
You are a piece of work.
Maybe Ann Marie was right.
You're jealous.
Don't believe me, why don't you go ask her? It's not my life you need to sort out, Gil, it's your own.
Get him, eh? Where's Ann Marie? How the hellwould Ellie know sod all about me? Is it true?She'd say anything to split us up.
You know that.
Trust you to Just answer the question.
I'm not answering to Ellie bloody Williams.
Answer to me! Get away from me! Is it my baby? Yes, of course! So, you won't mind doing a DNA test when it's born, then? Who? Here, where did you get that watch? Shoo gave it me.
Well, it looks very like the one I gave Euan for his 40th.
Are you calling my fiancee a thief? WellCalm it, Ina.
I lost that watch down on the golf course weeks before these lassies even arrived.
Oh, I'm sorry.
It was my mistake.
Mm.
Our wedding was a sham, you standing there saying, "To the exclusion of all others," while you're carrying someone else's child.
No, wait!And him, of all people! Why? I went to see him about Mum's will, a few months ago.
Oh, I think we can be more precise than that, huh? Let's call it six.
He offered me a drink and then another.
And he flattered me, and Oh, spare me the details! It's not just your fault, it's mine too.
I don't love you, Ann Marie.
I thought I did, but I don't.
Don't.
Don't say that! It'll never happen again! But it's just a symptom, isn't it? I mean, we have to ask ourselves why you slept with him if things were OK with us.
I was drunk! I love you so much! No, you don't.
You love my job and the fact that you think it'll take you to Edinburgh.
But I can't do it, for both our sakes.
I'm sorry.
I've been saving anyway, and soon I could get us booked in at Gretna Green.
What's that?Tradition, isn't it? It's where you go to get a quickie wedding.
It's dead romantic.
We just need to get a licence and we could be married in months.
Ooh! Erm, have you seen Ellie?What? Er, no, no.
Maybe she's having a quick tea break or something.
I'm sure she'll show up.
So where's the three mill? I mean, if you hand it over nice, Roy might think about not chopping your rather shapely legs off.
Roy can go stuff himself.
I earned that money.
I did five years for the rottenpig, and the whole time he'sgot a mistress and a kid.
Yeah.
Spare us the sob story, Elle.
Just show us the loot.
Come on, Marius.
One for the road? You brought me down here for a bit of slap and tickle? Just give us the money, will you? What, so you can give it to Roy and he can spend it on his slag? No, thanks.
Pull the trigger.
Don't piss about.
I'm serious.
After all he's put me through, I'd rather die rich.
I can't believe you're not sick of him yourself.
I mean, think about it.
We're both better off with Roy locked away.
Andwe could be a whole lot better off.
Don't you reckon? You wanna make me have to work it out of you? Eh? Cos you know I will if I have to.
God, Marius.
Look, what I'm saying iswe could team up, y'know, split the loot.
Sod Roy.
We could go somewherenice, somewhere sunny, have a bit of fun for once.
Yeah? And what about your sidekicks? Oh, the girls? They're just baggage.
I mean, they're nice, but they're dim.
Come on, Marius, I've seen the way you look at me.
Sadie, I've got some cake for you.
Holy £50 says you throw up first.
Dunno, mate.
I'm supposed to be working.
Yeah, right.
Now who looks scared? Follow me.
Look, is Ellie up here? No, and neither's bloody Sadie! What are you on about? See for yourself.
She's escaped! Oh, my good God! I know! Oh, you're joking me! KNOCKS Right, everyone, listen up.
You might as well all go home, because the wedding, the wedding's over.
My mum .
.
My mum's lucky she's not here to witness the mess her daughter's made of her life.
Seems Gil's changed his mind.
And who can blame him, eh? You've gotnothing more to threaten me with, Euan, because he knows.
Knows what, Euan? Euan, what's happening? Harries, a word.
I'll sort this out.
Gil, I can explain everything.
Ladies and gentlemen, I think, under the circumstances, we'd better call it a day.
I don't know what she told you, but it's not true.
She lying to you, I swear.
You just had to have what I've got.
You always did.
We were drunk.
Aye, but it was just a one-off.
Don't call this whole thing off on my account.
Don't flatter yourself.
Have you completely lost your mind? I think maybe I've just found it.
Do you want to tell her, or shall I? Empty.
It's a draw.
You're OK, y'know? I like you.
Hmm!! Well, I guess you're not such a bad guy, either.
I'm worse than bad.
You wish.
I am.
I've done things, more than you can imagine.
I reckon we all got secrets, mate.
No.
I'm going to hell, for sure.
You know what? I don't care.
Cos nothing can be worse than round my house.
What d'you mean? Get off, you moron.
I'm gay.
Typical.
The wedding's off, everyone's going home and we've got a major problem.
Sadie's only gone and jumped out the window.
Listen to me.
How could you? This is a personal matter, Rita.
It was a drunken, stupid mistake, that's all.
Leave them.
Leave them to it, doll.
What've you done to Mum? It's what I'm going to do to you, you should be worried about, you flaming liability.
Get! Bit of a scandal, eh? Oh, you gotta go, Dean.
I'll catch you tomorrow.
Well, my shift's not over till 12, we've got all that to clear up.
I said go home! What the hell is wrong with you? This is about us getting engaged, isn't it? Yeah, because, if Ann Marie and Gil can't make it, and they've known each other for yearsDon't be stupid.
Oh, right, so I'm stupid now, am I? No, I was just saying Look, let's just forget it.
Y'know, you can take your flippin' ring.
Now, go on, get lost.
Y'know what? I will, then.
Tell Ellie to stuff her crap job.
I'm sick of it.
I'm sick of the lot of you.
When I find you, Sadie Oh, tell Ellie thanks for the info.
Really made my day.
She overheard them, Gil.
She was only trying to help.
Oh, sure(!) Well, I hope I'm in a position to help her and her ex out some time.
Her ex? Mr Anger Management.
Marius.
Oh, didn't you know? No, they're having a loving reunion.
Imagine my old man could see us now.
Ha-ha, yeah, I am.
It's sweet.
Be a whole lot sweeter in my bedroom.
Why don't we carry on up there? Is that where the three mill's stashed? You don't think I'd keep it down here, do you, with all the booze, and the staff in and out whenever they like? C'mon.
There's a wedding going on.
No one'll bother us.
Let 'em.
I'll bother 'em back.
I'm good at that, as you well know.
Take a bottle, shall we? Yeah, I'll have that.
You still don't trust me.
Oh, I rate you, though, Elle.
Takes some neck to rob off Roy Lagden.
What I don't get is what you're doing in a crappy dump in Scotland.
Just taking a breather till I get shot of the girls.
OK, thanks.
Bye! Josie! Any sign of Sadie yet? Josie, we've got an even bigger problem.
Seriously, we're gonna have a right laugh, you and me.
Ah! Sadie? D'you really think I bought any of that guff? So you ARE Roy's little gun dog? No, sweetheart.
But you're right about one thing.
I am well sick of him.
Working for meself now.
So I never told Roy I was coming up here.
As far as he's concerned, I'm still hunting a trail down South.
I'm gonna take the lot, Elle.
Except, unlike you, I ain't gonna leave any clues.
Come here, you evil old bag! Don't even think about it.
What are we gonna do? Find him.
Here! It's Sadie! Get me out of here! BANGING Aaaah! Get her! One for luck.
Ladies? What a shower.
Let them go.
I'll show you where the money is.
Yeah, all right.
Joke(!) Upstairs.
And if you take me for a mug, I'm gonna come down here and start picking 'em off one by one.
Bedroom, is it? Office, actually.
I must be losing my touch.
Come.
I suppose she's gonna try and give him Sadie's money.
Huh, well, it's a little short of three million! Yes, thank you, Sadie.
We know that.
Maybe if I explained I mean, he's not going to kill a civilian, is he? No, Sadie, you don't understand.
He's a hitman.
He's not gonna leave any witnesses.
He's going to take your money, shoot Ellie and then come back down for us.
Oh, God.
I'm so sorry, Sadie.
We never meant for you to get involved.
It's a bit late for that.
We only wanted to go straight, to make it to Barbados.
Barbados, is it? You were going to rob me blind, leave me with postschematicstress syndrome and thenjaunt off to Barbados? Well, it's not going to happen, because we're all going to DIE! No! Look, Sadie's right.
It's not on.
We gotta get her out of 'ere.
Get on with it.
Run, Sadie.
Tell Dean I'd marry him if I could.
Well, tell him yourself.
Pass that barrel.
We can all get out.
Go, go! Ah! You are beginning to piss me right off! You're too late, darling.
That's the last of it.
The three mill's gone.
You're lying.
We had a fire.
It got burnt.
The whole sodding lot.
Nah, I don't buy that.
Well, it's the truth, you loser.
Bye-bye.
Aaaah! GUNSHOT AND SCREAMING Ellie! Oh, God.
OK.
OK, erm, we'll rush him.
FLOORBOARDS SQUEAK I think Ellie's fainted.
I suppose he is dead, is he? Oh, I'd put a spot of filler in that, dear.
The gun went off when he raised his arm.
Just missed my head by a whisker.
Ithink she's in shock.
I don't think she's the only one, Sade.
Oh! Well, that's me, then.
A murderer.
Well, it was self-defence! You saved Ellie's life, babes.
You're a hero! Heroine.
She saved all our lives.
He was going to get away with my money.
Well, I suppose it's all my fault for burning the rest.
No, it isn't.
You didn't know.
And after all we did to you I don't know how to say thank you.
I do.
You can buy me a drink.
By the side of the pool.
In Barbados.
Otherwise it's not going to look toogood to the police, is it? You've thieved from me, lied, kidnapped, and me, a74-year-old woman.
They'll lock you up and throw away the key.
And you! You said yourself that you're a murderer.
And you said it was self-defence.
I'm a hero, remember? Heroine.
No, I could walk out of here now andget Gil Cameron.
Unless you're planning to lock me up upstairs again? Actually, Gil probably won't be in the mood.
He and Ann Marie have decided to call it all off.
Eh? Seems the baby might be Euan's.
Euan Harries?! Gil found out.
Euan Harries and Ann Marie all this time, and both of them trying to get me out ofhere? What the hell's been going on? D'you still want to come with us? Oh, what, and leave all this, a falling-down hotel to run on my own again, being hounded out by a bunch of bloodsuckers? I'll die within the year, probably of boredom.
Let's face it, they weren't called the Famous Four.
But first off, we've got to get rid of him.
Keep the gun.
Gun.
Where did I put his car keys? Keys.
Oh.
OK.
We're gonna put his body in the boot of his car.
With his arm.
Arm.
Josie, you and the girls drive his car to the loch.
I'll follow behind in the jeep.
We'll keep Sadie herecos she's been through the mill.
Sadie?Mill.
Oh, for Christ's sake, stop fannying about.
Let's get on with it.
PHONE RINGS It's his mobile.
Sadie, throw this in the fire.
Fire.
Where the hell are you, Marius? You don't call me back pronto, you're a dead man.
Let's go home.
I'm afraid that's the lot.
£1,100? That's all that's left of my £200,000? We could check again in the morning, but it's pretty windy out there.
Can you give it a rest with the scrubbing? Have you ever heard of MRSA? No.
I think we've got bigger problems than germs, Hannah.
Thank you for reminding me, I'd forgotten(!) I take it none of you are murderers by trade yourselves? Not for want of trying.
No, Sadie, this is a first for all of us.
Well, that's a relief.
If I'm going to tag along, I want to feel safe in my bed when we get to foreign climes.
Well, we won't get very far, will we, if that's all that's left in the flamin' pot? Not to mention we still haven't got our passports.
You've got no passports? Well, we can't exactly use our old ones, can we? Hmm.
Why don't you get fake ones? Well, we kind of lost our contacts when we went on the run.
Unless, of course, you know a suitable forger.
No.
But I know a man who does.
Lithuanian.
Runs the fish-filleting factory at Inversnedden.
Mo buys from him.
Gets me knock-off liquor when funds are tight.
He's sorted out all his immigrant workers with ID.
Bit of a hard case, you know, but I suppose that goes with the job.
Sorry .
.
YOU, you can get us fake passports? If you'd just asked when you first got here Told you I'd pull my weight.
Cheers, girls.
Here's to Barbados! Cheers!Cheers!