Instant Star (2004) s01e05 Episode Script

Once upon a time there was a punk princess who rocked a musical kingdom.
We're gonna do it fast.
And she kinda dug its blue-eyed prince.
Shay needs a fresh new sound and the beats Quincy's been turning out for Jude? Killer.
Don't get too attached.
I'm loaning you Tommy for one song.
Look, that song's a test.
If Tom passes, we might record the whole album here.
All right? - Right.
Well, that depends.
- On what? On how many zeros you put on the cheque.
And then the emperor of hip hop invaded.
Darius? I got zeroes, Georgia.
I got lots of zeroes.
And took the one thing she most wanted.
What's he doing here? His nephew's coming tomorrow.
- Shay.
- Shay? As in "S to the H to the A to the Y"? The shay? I'm gonna be sharing a studio with him? Shay doesn't really share anything.
Not a studio or a producer.
What? You're producing him? Tommy, you're mine! Look, take studio C.
Just keep working on that song.
All right, I think it's got potential.
The princess wanted back what was rightfully hers: the palace, the pro tools and her prince.
But this wasn't fantasy, this was reality.
And the princess realized it bites.
Whoa! Take it over there.
It's like an entourage minefield.
Bigger the fame, bigger the posse.
Yeah.
I was thinking about that song, by the way.
What do you think about a new pornographers vibe? I think it's your call.
I gotta talk to Kwest about Shay's backing track, so See you.
EJ, how're we doing on hospitality? We've followed Shay's rider to a "T".
Two pounds of Ju-Jubes.
Assorted boxes of cereal, six quarts of vanilla soy milk.
- Careful! - Flowers? This is Shay, not J-Lo.
I can't believe you guys are catering to the whims of some boy diva.
That diva equals dollars in the bank, while you're an expense.
Oh, nice.
Lesson in politics? These are Shay's two CD's.
Listen to them and try and find something nice to say, okay? Yeah.
I'll try.
Shay! Shay, remember Tom Quincy? Tom, remember Shay? I remember some kid in braces named Shay-Shay.
Shay, this is Kwest.
He's my right-hand man, my sonic architect.
It's good to be working with you, man.
Yeah, me and Tommy, we cooked up some sick beats for you.
Them backin' tracks we got? - Straight killin'.
- Hold-up.
You my new backup girl? No.
I sing lead on my own records.
Shame.
'Cause you're definitely cute enough to be a Shay girl.
Jude.
Don't you have an album to finish? Studio C? I know.
I'm going.
I'm so sure that I'll be yours But baby, you could be mine It's all a It's all about hanging out Would it have killed them to sound proof this closet? That better be Jimmy Page in there.
It's Jude.
I'll tell her to cut it out.
No.
Forget it.
I'll take care of it myself.
Yo Kwest, turn that beat up! Go get 'em! Yo, we're doing things my way cuz otherwise you got to take the highway I'm the guy that's rocking on the mic and so what I say What I play is just the way Cute girl on the other side of the wall I like the way you move your body and if you fall I'll be the one that's gonna catch you before you hit the ground I'm feeling your sound Call me Shay on the M-I-C when you're listening to me You be listening to me beat-boppin to the rhythm that we give him Where we hit him with the beats on the streets Don't forget the way we livin' yo It's like a Shay, Jude mash-up.
And it kills.
Mash-ups don't sell a million records.
You gotta be open to new sounds, D.
Let's break out, experiment.
It's like the old Tommy I used to know.
Always willing to waste my money.
Here we go.
Two minutes together, we're already arguing.
You know I'm right.
That's why you put on the headphones.
Jude.
I thought you might be hungry after our little throw down.
Ah, so that's how you go through so much soy milk.
Checkin' out the competition? Kinda.
The second CD? Sold over a million copies.
I know.
Everyone's heard "S to the H to the A to the Y".
But your first CD's way better.
It shreds.
My first CD's my joint.
What happened? My uncle stepped up and took over.
He won't let me freestyle anymore or write my own stuff at all.
And you let him? When you got someone like Darius taking an interest? You listen and learn.
Learn how to sell your soul? For millions of fans and fine mommies.
Of course, there's always room in the fan club for one more.
Right.
Yeah.
I'll ask around at my next mensa meeting.
You're funny.
Most girls, they're too shy to even talk to me.
Lucky for them.
Oh, by the way? Say hi to my producer for me, okay? Erupt already! Want to remind me why you're doing a fourth grade project for extra credit? It's not fourth grade, it's a working seismological model.
And if I don't knock this project out I'm cruising for a D.
The baking powder is supposed to make it get all lava-y! Try baking soda, Marie Curie.
Oh.
I am such an idiot.
Goodbye beach, hello summer school.
Look why don't you bring Mt.
Katerina over tonight? I'll help you.
Bump you up to a solid C.
Thank you.
Okay, alrighty.
That's enough touching.
- Jude, right? - Yeah.
Whassup? I'm T-Bone.
My boy Shay wanted me to let you know you guys are on for dinner tonight before his show.
He'll pick you up at 6:00 p.
m.
Oh yeah, and on the down-low? My man loves pink.
So wear something fushia, he'd like that.
Jude.
Jude! Don't go in there.
You had your entourage ask me out? - You asked her out? - I didn't know I needed permission.
It doesn't matter.
Cause the answer's no.
Girl's afraid.
Afraid she can't handle the big Shay.
Handle what? Some beatbox who needs a stylist to lay out his jammies every night? Oh, so we gonna play now? Heard your new demo.
You wanna know what I think? It's Avril meets more Avril.
Really? This from a guy who doesn't even write his own lyrics.
I bet you couldn't compose a grocery list without Darius holding your hand.
- Damn.
- Look, she didn't mean it.
Yes, she did.
Excuse me.
Shay-Shay.
Right.
Okay.
Thanks.
Shay wants an apology.
You can do it in person, backstage, after his show.
Tonight.
Or he walks.
Forget it.
I'm not doing it.
Jude, please.
I need this album.
I know apologizing to Shay sucks.
But just do it for me? I'm gonna need backup.
- Of course I'll come.
- Awesome.
Thank you.
I owe you so much.
And I'll see you tonight.
You bet.
Jamie? A little help here, please! Got some DVDs for inspiration: Dante's Peak, Fire on a Mountain, and Gigli-- it's a little bit more of a disaster flick.
Right.
About your project.
I have a date tonight with Jude.
- Define date.
- Well, it's date adjacent.
We go to a show.
We stand around, apologize to Shay She said she needs me tonight.
You understand, don't you? Eh, little buddy? Yeah of course.
Me and Mt.
Katerina will go not erupt at home.
- Diet cola for m'lady.
- Thank you.
Ginger ale for her gawky, out-of-place dude.
So forget the children, we need to feed these women.
- It's called a "joke".
- No, the joke is that I'm being ordered to apologize for telling the truth.
Yeah.
But at least I still have my best friend, right? Yep.
Friend city over here.
Ladies and gentlemen give it up for Shay! True dat! We'll get to the hits, but you gotta bear with me.
I had a fight with a special someone today.
She was cold.
Told it like it is.
But I wanna show her I'm the real deal.
The beatles had their Jude, this is for mine Jude Harrison, ladies and gentlemen.
Give it up.
Y'all been down and out you know what I'm sayin'? Everybody gets down and out sometimes but I'll tell ya City life gets insane everybody always want to pick your brain Talking about how much money you got Talking about look at that girl so hot I was just thinking for a second that I Tell you what I've seen write across the sky Written to the fourth depth blew my mind Colours that I've never seen inside She knew best just what it's like When you rock them stories on the mic Cause there's what them rapper's doing right We drop the damn beat we keeping that hype If you've been down and out remember Now you gotta hold your head up high We've all had those long novembers Hush little baby, don't you cry I love you.
Hooking up with Shay? A publicity jackpot! I didn't hook up with him.
I practically called him a poseur.
Hey, poseurs need love, too.
So, what'd you think? I wrote it for you, girl.
To be honest, I'm confused.
I thought you wanted me to apologize.
Why? I ain't mad.
You told me the truth, which I never get to hear.
So, about that date? I know a great after hours place where we can go and just chill.
Yes, go! Have fun! Practice looking great together! Jude? I thought we were gonna grab a burger? No.
It's late.
Go home.
Okay.
- Thanks for the song.
- No problem.
Anytime.
I couldn't breathe.
It was like I was being pulled in 3 different directions at the same time.
Sounds like a crazy night, all right.
And then Tommy went all bodyguard to try to keep us apart.
It was crazy.
- Is he jealous? - Tommy? - Yeah.
- Rip the band-aid off already.
I mean, if you can't get over Tommy with this famous beautiful man, well then, I'm sorry, but you're doomed.
It's not that easy, Kat.
When I'm with Tommy, I feel like I can do anything.
- I can't just get over him.
- Have you tried? I mean, if people would just open their eyes and see who's right in front of them instead of obsessing over the wrong girl Guy? - What? - Wrong guy.
Guy.
Guy.
Right.
S'up, girl? Yes, yes, yes.
Jude, come.
I'll be just a second, all right? What're you doing here? You just don't give up, do you? You know the answer to this? When it comes to math, I am strictly remedial.
How did you do that? This is calculus.
I skipped two grades.
Surprised? I just didn't figure you for a mathlete.
You think I just stepped out of one of my videos? That I'm all rhymes and blingity-bling? I'm a real guy, Jude.
- S to the H to the A to the Y! - Hey, what's up, my brother? - You're nice to your fans.
- Of course.
Why do you think I'm so nice to you all the time? So? About that date.
You like movies? You're on.
No, no, no.
You don't understand.
Shay serenaded Jude.
Wow.
That's huge.
- You really got trumped.
- Yeah, I know.
Look, I'm sorry I bailed.
- How about tonight? - Okay.
Cause I was thinking, maybe you could invite Jude over to help.
And then maybe, you know, talk me up a bit before I show up? Is it possible for you to just help me without thinking about Jude for two seconds? Relax.
What is your problem? You, Andrews! You're totally blind! Magma.
I can't believe you bought every seat.
It's the only way to go.
It's your second bag! Darius dictates my sound, my look.
I dictate the small details like how many Ju-jubes I eat.
Right.
Well, that's kinda pathetic.
But it's cute.
Shay's driver just called.
He's at the movies with Jude.
When EJ found out, she actually cried.
Not you, too.
Tom, if Shay dates Jude, it'll be a publicity bonanza for G Major.
But Shay's a distraction.
I'm just thinking about what's best for Jude.
You mean, what's best for you? Like Jude's total attention? Whatever.
I got a song to mix.
Okay.
I'm sorry, I can't believe this.
I mean, the big Shay is macking on me? You are macking on me, right? Jude, you ever meet someone that makes you want to be better? And at your music? At everything? Sorry.
Yeah, it's Tommy.
I have to go.
Whoa.
I thought I jumped when Darius calls me.
All right.
I give you mounty Kat part deux.
A lava-spewing, noxious gas spilling, villager killing mountain of doom.
We're talking a solid C plus plus.
Wow.
Thank you.
Seriously.
So, now that we have one project down, we can refocus on project Jude.
Jamie, you don't have a hope.
Don't you get it? You don't think I'm good enough for her? Because I'm just a music geek with a dorky haircut! Read my lips, Oblivi-o.
I like your dorky haircut.
Okay.
You wanna hit close there? When I'm with you everything's all right Okay, so be honest.
All I know is how I feel When you're with me Waste my time Waste my time I guess I was holding you back.
I don't know.
It still feels like the vocals are missing something.
What do you think? You and Shay, huh? On a date? Oh please.
We're just hanging out.
I don't think he's a good idea, Jude.
Well, he's not an idea, he's a person.
A person I don't think you should see anymore.
What is this? I came here to work on my song, not hear some lecture.
Jude, you don't get it.
Whatever he told you, he told a million girls before.
In a week, he won't remember your name and I'll be left picking you up - off the floor as usual.
- You're wrong Tommy.
As usual.
By the way? It was a date.
- I tried my best, D.
- And the single crucifies.
You passed the test.
But something happened with Shay.
I don't know, he wants to bounce.
So you're leaving? I can't believe I'm saying this, but that sucks.
Well, what can I do? My song's finished, and you're shockingly immune to my smooth self.
Really? Look, after yesterday I really do owe you an apology.
But I'd rather give you this.
It's my song and I thought that it sounded better with your sound.
So I was thinking maybe we could record it together.
Yo, put that back, man.
Uncle D.
Change of plans.
I want Tom to produce the whole album.
That's cool.
Georgia! Call me Shay on the M-I-C when you listening to me You be listening to beat-boppin' to the rhythm that we give 'em When we hit 'em with the beats on the streets - Don't forget the way we livin' yo - Waste my time, waste my time Rest assured that I'll be yours Baby you could be mine It's all about hanging out Cause you know how to waste my time You know how to waste my time