Milo Murphy's Law (2016) s01e05 Episode Script
The Doctor Zone Files
1 [TITLE MUSIC.]
# Look at that sun Look at that sky # # Look at my sweater vest I look so fly # # Look at that mailbox Look at that tree # # It's about as beautiful as it can be # # Whoa # Today is gonna be exceptional Never boring even for a minute # It's my world and we're all livin' in it # # Whoa, whoa # Never boring even for a minute # It's my world and we're all livin' in it # [MUSIC PLAYING ON TV.]
# It's time for danger Time for action # # Time for Dr.
Zone! # # Chronological time is just An abstraction when # # You're with Dr.
Zone.
# He's got one foot in the future, # And one foot in the past, # # He's got one hand in the present, # # Or at least in a gift-shaped cast.
# # He's Dr.
Zone.
# # It's time for Dr.
Zone # DR.
ZONE: All my worrying just wasted time! Let's get it back! Quick, to the Time Bee-hicle.
I've got to hit that button! If only I had fingers on my right hand! [GRUNTING.]
[CONTINUES GRUNTING.]
The present is preventing me from getting to the future! TRASHCANDROIDS: [RECITING.]
One, one o', one, one They're closing in.
Time Ape, do something! [FEMALE VOICE.]
The time is now 1:54 p.
m.
No, you silly simian! Time is relative! The Trashcandroid! No! [GRUNTS.]
Time Ape, press the button! Righty crikey and tally-ho! Time waits for no man.
Except for me! # It's time for Dr.
Zone! # [GIGGLING.]
So, after your first Doctor Zone Files marathon, are you guys excited about the movie? Excited and confused.
I'm ex-fused.
And I'm con-cited? I know it's a lot of information to assimilate, but it's worth it! And Sara got us tickets for today's show! I'll just hold on to these, little brother.
To prevent them getting, you know, irradiated into particulate matter or something.
- Good idea! - My hand is asleep.
How I envy it.
The movie's not starting for hours, right? Yeah, but there's gonna be a line already.
- It's got 50 years of fans.
- Wait, 50 years? I thought we saw it all last night! Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No.
That was just the latest incarnation, Doctor Zone Files: The Next Regeneration.
MILO: First there was The Zone.
Then Dr.
Zone, Professor Zone, and Adjunct Faculty Member Zone that only lasted a semester.
And finally The Doctor Zone Files that you know, as of 3:00 this morning.
We just wanted to make sure you're prepared.
Doctor Zone fans can be kind of elitist.
- More tea? - Yes.
Oh, dear.
What are those people wearing? I'm just saying that if you can't actually speak the Trashcandroids binary language, then you have no place in this line.
Oh, don't be such an elitist, Josh.
Today is gonna be my favorite day ever! Unless something goes wrong.
Well, we made it to the theater.
What could possibly go wrong? [TRAIN HORN BLARING.]
Well, I have been Milo's sister since he was born.
- Oh.
Right.
- Which is why we're going in prepared! Nothing is gonna ruin this day for me! Exclamation point! She really puts a lot of faith in punctuation.
Clear.
No sign of any horrible mishap on the horizon "Name the alien monsters who eat your brain and absorb your knowledge.
" - Pass.
- Pass.
Cere-broids.
Come on, give me a tough one! The tickets! Oh, these are never leaving my hand.
Now, who knows how to fuse flesh and paper? - Pass.
- I'm gonna go check in with the local weather service about any more freak breezes! Time for danger! Time for action! Time for Diogee? [BARKS.]
Oh, sorry, you can't come in with us, but I did get you a ticket for the pet theater next door.
They're playing The Dog Door Bone Files.
[BARKS.]
[MUSIC.]
[BARKING.]
[SIGHS.]
- This is crazy.
- I know.
How can he be a time traveler and an alien and a cyborg? No, no.
Not that.
It's just been really quiet around Milo today.
Eh, well.
That's the thing about Murphy's Law, it's unpredictable! I've got the immediate area cordoned off.
Now, if you can just try not to do anything.
I'll go get my hazard protection suit out of the car.
Do Not Lose - Our Place.
- Sara, wait! I brought a spare! So, is Time Ape an ape with a clock for a head? Or a clock with the body of an ape? Ugh, I can't believe you newbies.
What does that make you, "Old-bies"? Time Ape isn't a clock or an ape.
- He's a trans-chronological being.
- You see, while traveling through the space time continuum, Dr.
Zone was sucked into a rift of space time where he met another time traveler like himself.
But since this being was not from our dimension, his appearance would cause any normal person's head to explode! So for us to comprehend him, the Time Ape took the form that we now know.
Wait, so you're saying that the form that would be easier for us to comprehend is an ape with a clock for a head? Would you want your head to explode? Would you? He's right.
I'd rather look at an ape with a clock for its head.
[SNIFFING.]
- You hear that? - [SNIFFING.]
Yeah, it smells quiet.
Too quiet.
No disaster yet means an even bigger disaster is coming! Mmm.
That's not necessarily true, but Time to be proactive.
Milo, why don't you wait near that really cool dirt parking lot and I'll call when it's time to go into the movie, 'kay? Or, I could get us some snacks? SARA: [GASPS.]
Pistachios? That's Dr.
Zone's favorite nut! - You guys save our place.
- Of course, that's just a theory, but if you direct your attention to this authoritative guide [MELISSA READING.]
Repetitive redundancy, nice.
Vintage! - Great costumes guys! - Costumes? One bag of pistachios please.
It's pronounced, "Pistah-chio.
" - That's how she said it.
- Don't speak to the customers.
I wasn't speaking to customers, I was speaking to you.
You were speaking to customers.
CAVENDISH: Well one of us has to speak to the customers, but it shouldn't be you.
Uh-oh, looks like something got jammed in that broiler.
[RUMBLING.]
- You did that.
- I was just standing here, not talking to customers, but whoa! Maybe that was it, Milo! - No more catastrophes today! - Um, maybe.
You guys okay? - Weird.
They just disappeared.
- Or did they? BOTH: Bum, bum, bum.
The end, question mark.
Or, Dr.
Zone's mom knew that, like, - their planet was going to explode.
- Implode.
MELISSA: Right, so she wrapped her babies in those blankets that babies are always escaping imploding planets in.
But the get-away rocket only had room for one baby.
So the other baby was caught in the implosion and sucked into a time vortex that turned him into a trans-chronological being, whose appearance would make our heads explode.
So when he turned into the Time Ape, it's because he was already a Time Ape before! - Exactly! - Oh, see, that would make more sense! And therefore, Time Ape would be Dr.
Zone's brother.
- No.
- Now, that is ridiculous! How is that more ridiculous than your theory? If Dr.
Zone and the Time Ape were brothers, I would've figured it out by now.
[GROWLING.]
- What is he doing? - I don't know.
I'm really tired.
Hey, whoa, whoa.
Watch where you're pointing that Zone Monkey Fighting Stance! These poseurs don't deserve to be here.
- Newbies! - Now, just wait a minute.
Enough! Newbies! Old-bies! Lend me your ears! Oh.
No, not literally.
Look, no one gets to define the parameters of what it means to be a fan.
We're not just fans of fantasy.
It's more than that.
It's about what fantasy means to each of us.
Fantasy means, um "Fantaso" from the Greek which means, "to show.
" Exactly! We're here today to show our love.
Because there's nothing better than sharing something you love With someone you love.
[CROWD MURMURING IN EMPATHY.]
[CHEERING.]
Can you guys wrap it up? Oh, sorry, Bertram.
I didn't see you there.
- Nice trashcandroid costume! - Thanks Tickets please.
Hey, now, just wait a minute! Enough! I lost the tickets while I was doing my inspirational speech.
[ALL GASPING.]
- Uh, doesn't sound like your day.
- Well, I've got mine.
- You snooze, you lose.
- Coming through.
That's why I bought four extras It was all my fault.
I was so worried about Murphy's Law messing things up Maybe next time, I just won't come.
- I hate that idea.
- I hate that idea, too.
I've already got enough excitement in my life anyway.
After all, I saw a train come through our backyard.
But what about the movie? Eh.
Seeing a movie on opening day is overrated.
[CRASH.]
Also, clearly, very dangerous.
- Just in case.
- Nope.
Much better.
Well, Time Ape, once again we've had the time of our lives.
After all, time is relative! They are brothers! She was right! Newbie! [ALL CHANTING.]
Newbie! Newbie! What happened to the wall? Wow, my backpack sure is heavy today! What do you got in there? [SCOFFS.]
Osmium? Y'know, the densest element? Periodic table.
Boom! Actually, it's a doctor's note.
The school lets me turn them in in bulk at the end of the month, that way the doctor only has to sign the signature page, instead of all the individual excuses.
Melissa keeps a record of all my adventures.
- So it makes it easier to catalog.
- You keep a record? Yeah, on my phone.
The kangaroos, the tangerine fight at Mardi Gras, - the asteroid - The llama incident Wait, so you've been taking pictures this Holy cow! - Yep, Milo gets around.
- How long is your selfie-stick? Anyway, I gotta turn these bad boys in today, or else I have a month of unexcused absences and - Stop! Milo.
- Hi, Elliot! How do you stop people who aren't named Milo? I don't turn the sign around.
ALL: Oh! Besides, there's only one person in this town I need to stop.
- And his middle name is danger.
- Is that true? [SCOFFS.]
No.
It's pronounced, [IN FRENCH ACCENT.]
"Danger.
" It's my grandmother's maiden name Enough! You have to do as I say! And, as the duly appointed Public Safety Czar, it is my job Um, your badge says, "Volunteer Crossing Guard.
" And this one says, "Ask me about my Strawberry Waffle Supreme.
" They're quite tasty and they're half price this week! Well, as delicious as that sounds, Elliot, we have to go to school.
I have my eye on you, Murphy.
And I never rest.
In fact, I sleep with this stop sign.
If you never rest, how do you sleep? Very restlessly! ALL: Oh! [HORN BLARING.]
[SCREAMING.]
Ahhh! There's a water bug on the back of this! Without that signature page, you'll have a month of unexcused absences! Holy cow.
I'm gonna have to repeat the seventh grade! Don't worry, Milo! We'll help you find that note! But how? This is ridiculous, I mean that note could be Oh, there it is.
I'll get it.
Murphy's Law.
Boom.
Are you gonna be saying that a lot? - I'm thinking about it.
- After that note! I'm watching you, Milo! So, strawberry waffles? [SIGHS.]
They're quite tasty and half price this week MILO: Hey, biker gang! Come back! MELISSA: I don't think you'd call them a gang.
MILO: What's a group of biker's then, a gaggle? - ZACK: I think it's a pod.
- MELISSA: No, that's whales.
Oh, there it is! I got it! I got it! What the - What was that? - It looks like some kind of spy drone.
What the devil, is that a doctor's note? Lieutenant, did you take a short cut through the Murphy Sector? I'm sorry, sir.
I just wanted to see if my brother-in-law - was using my lawn mower again.
- Well? Was he? - Yeah, I got a shot of it.
- Oh, that makes me so mad! MILO: Oh, great, I'm covered in garbage again! Milo, wouldn't it be easier just to get your doctor to sign a new one? It's Tuesday.
He's playing golf somewhere.
We'd never find him! Excuse me, you're not a doctor, are you? No.
One, two, three, four, five It's on the seventh floor.
Come on! [MUSIC.]
[ALL PANTING.]
Oh, no, there's paper everywhere! I guess they haven't gone digital yet.
My note could be anywhere.
We'll find it! Come on, let's split up! [MUSIC.]
[GRUNTS.]
Excuse me, ma'am? But would you mind lifting up your coffee cup, please? Thank you.
Oh, my gosh, this coffee stain is a perfect likeness of Frank Eugene Austin, inventor of the ant farm.
- It's a miracle! - I bet it has healing powers.
WOMAN: Oh, I want to see it! [CLAMORING.]
That's my doctor's note! [FAN WHIRRING.]
Seriously? What? It was getting stuffy in here.
I don't believe it.
It's a ticker tape parade.
You sure you can't get your doctor to sign a new note? I told you.
There's no way to find him.
- Are you a doctor? - No.
- That's it, it's over.
- No, it's not over! When we signed up to be Milo's friend, - we knew it wouldn't be easy.
- I don't remember signing anything.
So are we going to find that note? That's a good question.
You're supposed to say, "Yes," Milo.
- Well then.
Yes! - That's the spirit! MAN: You doin' all right up there, sir? Aw, I'm doing great! You know what? I'd love a hamburger.
They don't have hamburgers in space.
The parade must be for that astronaut.
Oh, it's not for the astronaut.
This parade is celebrating the 150th anniversary of ticker tape parades.
Then what's the astronaut for? They're just giving him a ride somewhere.
Very slowly, because he likes to sit up there.
[GASPS.]
The astronaut's back! Yes, I know he's back! We all just saw him.
No, I mean the [DIOGEE BARKING.]
[SNIFFS AND BARKS.]
Excuse me for a second, Zack.
What is it, boy? [BARKS.]
Hey, everybody! Diogee found the note.
- It's on the astronaut's back! - Eh.
Fine.
Hey! Mr.
Astronaut! Hey! Hey! Can you hear me? Hey! Can you hear me? Hey! Hey! Can you hear me? Hey! Can you hear me? Larry! Open the door! [POP MUSIC PLAYING.]
I'm running out of air out here! I never should have given him those headphones! COLONEL NIBLET: Uh-oh.
Wilson is losing it.
We can't have him freaking out in front of all those people! Use the Disintegration Ray! [POWERING UP.]
Uh, sir? We could just drive him out of the parade.
He'll be fine once he gets his hamburger.
You're right, Lieutenant.
Ugh! And to think of all the parade astronauts that I've unnecessarily disintegrated.
- Stand down, soldier.
- Aw! Don't worry, sir.
We'll get you that hamburger soon.
Awesome.
'Cause they don't have hamburgers in space.
There! I got it, I got it, I got it! Milo! Look out! Oh, well.
Have fun in high school, guys.
No.
You know the middle school code.
No one gets left behind.
Boom! That's right.
I'm going after it.
Wow, that's going a lot slower than I thought.
After that slow-moving street sweeper! Okay, could be worse.
How? How could this be worse? Eh, you could accidentally get your head caught in a helicopter door that flies you out of the ocean where it drops you straight into a pod of ravenous orca that rip you apart leaving nothing but your bones for the hungry crabs in the inky depths - at the bottom of the ocean.
- Wow.
I mean Yeah, I'm I'm not sure how to respond to that.
Aw, come on, ya babies.
[MUSIC.]
# I know you've heard it all before # # Like when I told ya that The dog ate my homework # # Or when I left it in my other pants # # And then they went in the wash # # Aw yeah # # And I know this story Isn't easy to accept # # But the power went out And so I over-slept # I had a million good excuses # Now they're gone # We'll have to cope with the loss # Yeah, yeah, yeah! # - # I've got no # - # No explanation # - # I've got no # - # No validation # # I've got no justification I'm just useless, baby # - # I've got no # - # No mitigation # - # I've got no # - # No confirmation # # No documentation, No excuses, baby, today # Milo, I see it! That's great! My foot is stuck! And I'm about to be shredded and recycled.
Oh, no.
That's not great.
The being shredded part, not the recycling part.
- Because recycling is an important way to - MELISSA: Milo! Oh.
Oh, I'm sorry.
On my way! Here I come, Melissa! Don't worry I'm Ahhh! I'll get there.
Don't worry! I'm worrying.
You know, I bet that whole thing with the helicopter and the orcas is looking pretty good right now.
Okay, that was kinda awesome.
- Doctor's note.
Boom.
- Melissa, you've got the note! "Please excuse Lola Sundergard"? This isn't my note! Who is Lola Sundergard? Oh, great! You found my doctor's note! - Thanks! - Bam! Well, I I guess we're gonna be going.
Yeah, us too, uh - Bye! - Bye! - Hey.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- Hey.
[BARKS.]
[OINKS.]
Diogee! Where did you get this? Hey! It's your doctor's note! Life has a strange way of working out.
Good boy, Diogee.
Well, we have plenty of time to turn in these doctor's Stop! Hang on a second, this was This was just working.
We're just trying to get to school! Why can't you leave us alone? Because Milo is a danger to this town, and I'm going to protect it from him.
I'm like the wind.
I'm everywhere and nowhere.
You're never going to see me Okay, wow.
That was impressive.
Yeah, I don't know how you did that, Elliot, but we're going to go to school now.
So, see you tomorrow.
Okay? Sorry, sir.
I I thought Ugh.
Please tell me we have a re-integration ray? Yes, sir.
I just flip this switch, sir.
Wait a minute, what just happened? Last thing I remembered, I was in a parade.
Listen, I have a confession to make.
- Yeah, what? - I am a doctor.
You Why didn't you just tell me the truth? II wanted you to like me for who I am.
Well, it totally worked! # It's my world and we're all livin' in it # [MUSIC.]
# We're all livin' in it # CHORUS: # Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # MILO: Oh, thanks, everybody! That is so motivational.
Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # Whoa # # I'm not sitting here watching the world turn # # You know I'd rather spin it # Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # It's my world and we're all livin' in it #
# Look at that sun Look at that sky # # Look at my sweater vest I look so fly # # Look at that mailbox Look at that tree # # It's about as beautiful as it can be # # Whoa # Today is gonna be exceptional Never boring even for a minute # It's my world and we're all livin' in it # # Whoa, whoa # Never boring even for a minute # It's my world and we're all livin' in it # [MUSIC PLAYING ON TV.]
# It's time for danger Time for action # # Time for Dr.
Zone! # # Chronological time is just An abstraction when # # You're with Dr.
Zone.
# He's got one foot in the future, # And one foot in the past, # # He's got one hand in the present, # # Or at least in a gift-shaped cast.
# # He's Dr.
Zone.
# # It's time for Dr.
Zone # DR.
ZONE: All my worrying just wasted time! Let's get it back! Quick, to the Time Bee-hicle.
I've got to hit that button! If only I had fingers on my right hand! [GRUNTING.]
[CONTINUES GRUNTING.]
The present is preventing me from getting to the future! TRASHCANDROIDS: [RECITING.]
One, one o', one, one They're closing in.
Time Ape, do something! [FEMALE VOICE.]
The time is now 1:54 p.
m.
No, you silly simian! Time is relative! The Trashcandroid! No! [GRUNTS.]
Time Ape, press the button! Righty crikey and tally-ho! Time waits for no man.
Except for me! # It's time for Dr.
Zone! # [GIGGLING.]
So, after your first Doctor Zone Files marathon, are you guys excited about the movie? Excited and confused.
I'm ex-fused.
And I'm con-cited? I know it's a lot of information to assimilate, but it's worth it! And Sara got us tickets for today's show! I'll just hold on to these, little brother.
To prevent them getting, you know, irradiated into particulate matter or something.
- Good idea! - My hand is asleep.
How I envy it.
The movie's not starting for hours, right? Yeah, but there's gonna be a line already.
- It's got 50 years of fans.
- Wait, 50 years? I thought we saw it all last night! Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No.
That was just the latest incarnation, Doctor Zone Files: The Next Regeneration.
MILO: First there was The Zone.
Then Dr.
Zone, Professor Zone, and Adjunct Faculty Member Zone that only lasted a semester.
And finally The Doctor Zone Files that you know, as of 3:00 this morning.
We just wanted to make sure you're prepared.
Doctor Zone fans can be kind of elitist.
- More tea? - Yes.
Oh, dear.
What are those people wearing? I'm just saying that if you can't actually speak the Trashcandroids binary language, then you have no place in this line.
Oh, don't be such an elitist, Josh.
Today is gonna be my favorite day ever! Unless something goes wrong.
Well, we made it to the theater.
What could possibly go wrong? [TRAIN HORN BLARING.]
Well, I have been Milo's sister since he was born.
- Oh.
Right.
- Which is why we're going in prepared! Nothing is gonna ruin this day for me! Exclamation point! She really puts a lot of faith in punctuation.
Clear.
No sign of any horrible mishap on the horizon "Name the alien monsters who eat your brain and absorb your knowledge.
" - Pass.
- Pass.
Cere-broids.
Come on, give me a tough one! The tickets! Oh, these are never leaving my hand.
Now, who knows how to fuse flesh and paper? - Pass.
- I'm gonna go check in with the local weather service about any more freak breezes! Time for danger! Time for action! Time for Diogee? [BARKS.]
Oh, sorry, you can't come in with us, but I did get you a ticket for the pet theater next door.
They're playing The Dog Door Bone Files.
[BARKS.]
[MUSIC.]
[BARKING.]
[SIGHS.]
- This is crazy.
- I know.
How can he be a time traveler and an alien and a cyborg? No, no.
Not that.
It's just been really quiet around Milo today.
Eh, well.
That's the thing about Murphy's Law, it's unpredictable! I've got the immediate area cordoned off.
Now, if you can just try not to do anything.
I'll go get my hazard protection suit out of the car.
Do Not Lose - Our Place.
- Sara, wait! I brought a spare! So, is Time Ape an ape with a clock for a head? Or a clock with the body of an ape? Ugh, I can't believe you newbies.
What does that make you, "Old-bies"? Time Ape isn't a clock or an ape.
- He's a trans-chronological being.
- You see, while traveling through the space time continuum, Dr.
Zone was sucked into a rift of space time where he met another time traveler like himself.
But since this being was not from our dimension, his appearance would cause any normal person's head to explode! So for us to comprehend him, the Time Ape took the form that we now know.
Wait, so you're saying that the form that would be easier for us to comprehend is an ape with a clock for a head? Would you want your head to explode? Would you? He's right.
I'd rather look at an ape with a clock for its head.
[SNIFFING.]
- You hear that? - [SNIFFING.]
Yeah, it smells quiet.
Too quiet.
No disaster yet means an even bigger disaster is coming! Mmm.
That's not necessarily true, but Time to be proactive.
Milo, why don't you wait near that really cool dirt parking lot and I'll call when it's time to go into the movie, 'kay? Or, I could get us some snacks? SARA: [GASPS.]
Pistachios? That's Dr.
Zone's favorite nut! - You guys save our place.
- Of course, that's just a theory, but if you direct your attention to this authoritative guide [MELISSA READING.]
Repetitive redundancy, nice.
Vintage! - Great costumes guys! - Costumes? One bag of pistachios please.
It's pronounced, "Pistah-chio.
" - That's how she said it.
- Don't speak to the customers.
I wasn't speaking to customers, I was speaking to you.
You were speaking to customers.
CAVENDISH: Well one of us has to speak to the customers, but it shouldn't be you.
Uh-oh, looks like something got jammed in that broiler.
[RUMBLING.]
- You did that.
- I was just standing here, not talking to customers, but whoa! Maybe that was it, Milo! - No more catastrophes today! - Um, maybe.
You guys okay? - Weird.
They just disappeared.
- Or did they? BOTH: Bum, bum, bum.
The end, question mark.
Or, Dr.
Zone's mom knew that, like, - their planet was going to explode.
- Implode.
MELISSA: Right, so she wrapped her babies in those blankets that babies are always escaping imploding planets in.
But the get-away rocket only had room for one baby.
So the other baby was caught in the implosion and sucked into a time vortex that turned him into a trans-chronological being, whose appearance would make our heads explode.
So when he turned into the Time Ape, it's because he was already a Time Ape before! - Exactly! - Oh, see, that would make more sense! And therefore, Time Ape would be Dr.
Zone's brother.
- No.
- Now, that is ridiculous! How is that more ridiculous than your theory? If Dr.
Zone and the Time Ape were brothers, I would've figured it out by now.
[GROWLING.]
- What is he doing? - I don't know.
I'm really tired.
Hey, whoa, whoa.
Watch where you're pointing that Zone Monkey Fighting Stance! These poseurs don't deserve to be here.
- Newbies! - Now, just wait a minute.
Enough! Newbies! Old-bies! Lend me your ears! Oh.
No, not literally.
Look, no one gets to define the parameters of what it means to be a fan.
We're not just fans of fantasy.
It's more than that.
It's about what fantasy means to each of us.
Fantasy means, um "Fantaso" from the Greek which means, "to show.
" Exactly! We're here today to show our love.
Because there's nothing better than sharing something you love With someone you love.
[CROWD MURMURING IN EMPATHY.]
[CHEERING.]
Can you guys wrap it up? Oh, sorry, Bertram.
I didn't see you there.
- Nice trashcandroid costume! - Thanks Tickets please.
Hey, now, just wait a minute! Enough! I lost the tickets while I was doing my inspirational speech.
[ALL GASPING.]
- Uh, doesn't sound like your day.
- Well, I've got mine.
- You snooze, you lose.
- Coming through.
That's why I bought four extras It was all my fault.
I was so worried about Murphy's Law messing things up Maybe next time, I just won't come.
- I hate that idea.
- I hate that idea, too.
I've already got enough excitement in my life anyway.
After all, I saw a train come through our backyard.
But what about the movie? Eh.
Seeing a movie on opening day is overrated.
[CRASH.]
Also, clearly, very dangerous.
- Just in case.
- Nope.
Much better.
Well, Time Ape, once again we've had the time of our lives.
After all, time is relative! They are brothers! She was right! Newbie! [ALL CHANTING.]
Newbie! Newbie! What happened to the wall? Wow, my backpack sure is heavy today! What do you got in there? [SCOFFS.]
Osmium? Y'know, the densest element? Periodic table.
Boom! Actually, it's a doctor's note.
The school lets me turn them in in bulk at the end of the month, that way the doctor only has to sign the signature page, instead of all the individual excuses.
Melissa keeps a record of all my adventures.
- So it makes it easier to catalog.
- You keep a record? Yeah, on my phone.
The kangaroos, the tangerine fight at Mardi Gras, - the asteroid - The llama incident Wait, so you've been taking pictures this Holy cow! - Yep, Milo gets around.
- How long is your selfie-stick? Anyway, I gotta turn these bad boys in today, or else I have a month of unexcused absences and - Stop! Milo.
- Hi, Elliot! How do you stop people who aren't named Milo? I don't turn the sign around.
ALL: Oh! Besides, there's only one person in this town I need to stop.
- And his middle name is danger.
- Is that true? [SCOFFS.]
No.
It's pronounced, [IN FRENCH ACCENT.]
"Danger.
" It's my grandmother's maiden name Enough! You have to do as I say! And, as the duly appointed Public Safety Czar, it is my job Um, your badge says, "Volunteer Crossing Guard.
" And this one says, "Ask me about my Strawberry Waffle Supreme.
" They're quite tasty and they're half price this week! Well, as delicious as that sounds, Elliot, we have to go to school.
I have my eye on you, Murphy.
And I never rest.
In fact, I sleep with this stop sign.
If you never rest, how do you sleep? Very restlessly! ALL: Oh! [HORN BLARING.]
[SCREAMING.]
Ahhh! There's a water bug on the back of this! Without that signature page, you'll have a month of unexcused absences! Holy cow.
I'm gonna have to repeat the seventh grade! Don't worry, Milo! We'll help you find that note! But how? This is ridiculous, I mean that note could be Oh, there it is.
I'll get it.
Murphy's Law.
Boom.
Are you gonna be saying that a lot? - I'm thinking about it.
- After that note! I'm watching you, Milo! So, strawberry waffles? [SIGHS.]
They're quite tasty and half price this week MILO: Hey, biker gang! Come back! MELISSA: I don't think you'd call them a gang.
MILO: What's a group of biker's then, a gaggle? - ZACK: I think it's a pod.
- MELISSA: No, that's whales.
Oh, there it is! I got it! I got it! What the - What was that? - It looks like some kind of spy drone.
What the devil, is that a doctor's note? Lieutenant, did you take a short cut through the Murphy Sector? I'm sorry, sir.
I just wanted to see if my brother-in-law - was using my lawn mower again.
- Well? Was he? - Yeah, I got a shot of it.
- Oh, that makes me so mad! MILO: Oh, great, I'm covered in garbage again! Milo, wouldn't it be easier just to get your doctor to sign a new one? It's Tuesday.
He's playing golf somewhere.
We'd never find him! Excuse me, you're not a doctor, are you? No.
One, two, three, four, five It's on the seventh floor.
Come on! [MUSIC.]
[ALL PANTING.]
Oh, no, there's paper everywhere! I guess they haven't gone digital yet.
My note could be anywhere.
We'll find it! Come on, let's split up! [MUSIC.]
[GRUNTS.]
Excuse me, ma'am? But would you mind lifting up your coffee cup, please? Thank you.
Oh, my gosh, this coffee stain is a perfect likeness of Frank Eugene Austin, inventor of the ant farm.
- It's a miracle! - I bet it has healing powers.
WOMAN: Oh, I want to see it! [CLAMORING.]
That's my doctor's note! [FAN WHIRRING.]
Seriously? What? It was getting stuffy in here.
I don't believe it.
It's a ticker tape parade.
You sure you can't get your doctor to sign a new note? I told you.
There's no way to find him.
- Are you a doctor? - No.
- That's it, it's over.
- No, it's not over! When we signed up to be Milo's friend, - we knew it wouldn't be easy.
- I don't remember signing anything.
So are we going to find that note? That's a good question.
You're supposed to say, "Yes," Milo.
- Well then.
Yes! - That's the spirit! MAN: You doin' all right up there, sir? Aw, I'm doing great! You know what? I'd love a hamburger.
They don't have hamburgers in space.
The parade must be for that astronaut.
Oh, it's not for the astronaut.
This parade is celebrating the 150th anniversary of ticker tape parades.
Then what's the astronaut for? They're just giving him a ride somewhere.
Very slowly, because he likes to sit up there.
[GASPS.]
The astronaut's back! Yes, I know he's back! We all just saw him.
No, I mean the [DIOGEE BARKING.]
[SNIFFS AND BARKS.]
Excuse me for a second, Zack.
What is it, boy? [BARKS.]
Hey, everybody! Diogee found the note.
- It's on the astronaut's back! - Eh.
Fine.
Hey! Mr.
Astronaut! Hey! Hey! Can you hear me? Hey! Can you hear me? Hey! Hey! Can you hear me? Hey! Can you hear me? Larry! Open the door! [POP MUSIC PLAYING.]
I'm running out of air out here! I never should have given him those headphones! COLONEL NIBLET: Uh-oh.
Wilson is losing it.
We can't have him freaking out in front of all those people! Use the Disintegration Ray! [POWERING UP.]
Uh, sir? We could just drive him out of the parade.
He'll be fine once he gets his hamburger.
You're right, Lieutenant.
Ugh! And to think of all the parade astronauts that I've unnecessarily disintegrated.
- Stand down, soldier.
- Aw! Don't worry, sir.
We'll get you that hamburger soon.
Awesome.
'Cause they don't have hamburgers in space.
There! I got it, I got it, I got it! Milo! Look out! Oh, well.
Have fun in high school, guys.
No.
You know the middle school code.
No one gets left behind.
Boom! That's right.
I'm going after it.
Wow, that's going a lot slower than I thought.
After that slow-moving street sweeper! Okay, could be worse.
How? How could this be worse? Eh, you could accidentally get your head caught in a helicopter door that flies you out of the ocean where it drops you straight into a pod of ravenous orca that rip you apart leaving nothing but your bones for the hungry crabs in the inky depths - at the bottom of the ocean.
- Wow.
I mean Yeah, I'm I'm not sure how to respond to that.
Aw, come on, ya babies.
[MUSIC.]
# I know you've heard it all before # # Like when I told ya that The dog ate my homework # # Or when I left it in my other pants # # And then they went in the wash # # Aw yeah # # And I know this story Isn't easy to accept # # But the power went out And so I over-slept # I had a million good excuses # Now they're gone # We'll have to cope with the loss # Yeah, yeah, yeah! # - # I've got no # - # No explanation # - # I've got no # - # No validation # # I've got no justification I'm just useless, baby # - # I've got no # - # No mitigation # - # I've got no # - # No confirmation # # No documentation, No excuses, baby, today # Milo, I see it! That's great! My foot is stuck! And I'm about to be shredded and recycled.
Oh, no.
That's not great.
The being shredded part, not the recycling part.
- Because recycling is an important way to - MELISSA: Milo! Oh.
Oh, I'm sorry.
On my way! Here I come, Melissa! Don't worry I'm Ahhh! I'll get there.
Don't worry! I'm worrying.
You know, I bet that whole thing with the helicopter and the orcas is looking pretty good right now.
Okay, that was kinda awesome.
- Doctor's note.
Boom.
- Melissa, you've got the note! "Please excuse Lola Sundergard"? This isn't my note! Who is Lola Sundergard? Oh, great! You found my doctor's note! - Thanks! - Bam! Well, I I guess we're gonna be going.
Yeah, us too, uh - Bye! - Bye! - Hey.
- Hey.
- Hey.
- Hey.
[BARKS.]
[OINKS.]
Diogee! Where did you get this? Hey! It's your doctor's note! Life has a strange way of working out.
Good boy, Diogee.
Well, we have plenty of time to turn in these doctor's Stop! Hang on a second, this was This was just working.
We're just trying to get to school! Why can't you leave us alone? Because Milo is a danger to this town, and I'm going to protect it from him.
I'm like the wind.
I'm everywhere and nowhere.
You're never going to see me Okay, wow.
That was impressive.
Yeah, I don't know how you did that, Elliot, but we're going to go to school now.
So, see you tomorrow.
Okay? Sorry, sir.
I I thought Ugh.
Please tell me we have a re-integration ray? Yes, sir.
I just flip this switch, sir.
Wait a minute, what just happened? Last thing I remembered, I was in a parade.
Listen, I have a confession to make.
- Yeah, what? - I am a doctor.
You Why didn't you just tell me the truth? II wanted you to like me for who I am.
Well, it totally worked! # It's my world and we're all livin' in it # [MUSIC.]
# We're all livin' in it # CHORUS: # Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # MILO: Oh, thanks, everybody! That is so motivational.
Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # Whoa # # I'm not sitting here watching the world turn # # You know I'd rather spin it # Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # It's my world and we're all livin' in it #