Standing Up (2022) s01e05 Episode Script

1 A NETFLIX SERIES Hold on.
What's today's date? Well, the 19th, right? - Aim well.
- You want to do it instead of me? Ugh, these things are so impractical.
What are you doing, Mom? - Nothing.
- Hey, hey.
- Where are you going? - I have to pee, Mommy.
Sorry, sweetheart.
Sorry.
You have to pee, baby? Alright, come on.
Come on now.
Okay Come on.
You pee like a big girl, alright? Come on.
Huh? I'm done! Hello.
I didn't see you, you were in my blind spot.
- Everything alright, dear? - Great.
I'm a bit tired, so I'm going to No, wait.
Tell me.
How did it go yesterday? What? Well, your last day of exams.
- Did it go well? - Oh, yeah.
Yeah.
Perfectly well.
Oh, there was, uh, a practical case about the Orangerie Museum and, uh, questions about the restoration of Flemish paintings.
Oh, right.
Right.
Interesting.
Then we went to celebrate with Victor and the girls, so I'm So I'm going to bed.
I like Victor very much.
Yes.
How is he? He's doing well.
He got a haircut.
Are you okay? Uh, never better.
See you later.
- Mmm.
- Love you.
Well, I went back on the pill not long ago, so I guess I must have gotten pregnant, uh, just before.
- Yes.
We wanted a second baby.
- Then we decided not to.
- So now we're still hesitating.
- Mmm.
That's why we would like to know all the options before deciding.
Well, uh, the legal limit for abortion in France is 12 weeks, about, of amenorrhea of pregnancy.
Mmm.
So you uh, now You You have You still have - Uh, eight weeks.
- Eight weeks.
So we'll discuss it again in nine.
Let's do that.
Come on.
So And so, how does it unfold, concretely? Well Uh, well, concretely, we can offer the patient the abortion pill.
But are there any risks? Well, there are two possible complications.
Uh, number one, the fetus doesn't go away.
And number two, uh perforation of the uterine or synechiae of the uterine walls I mean, it's very rare.
Okay.
Very rare.
Very well, I just have one last question.
Is it true that abortion can prevent you from having another baby? No, that's a legend.
No, that's a legend.
- Hmm.
- Thank you.
Jean-Michel approaches the cave.
Of course, he's an experienced diver.
He's very familiar with moray eels.
In tropical waters, the moray eel is in its element.
It can swim up to a speed of 20 miles per hour.
While it's a fascinating - Hi.
Is this a bad time, or - No.
I'm watching something about moray eels.
It's crazy.
Okay.
enables it to catch its prey, attract it into its stomach, and devour it.
You see its jaw? That's a dragon moray.
Remind you of anyone? Uh, Donald Trump? My sister! It's so her.
Look! She looks sweet, chilling under a rock, and suddenly, bam! She eats you.
You're the first one to come visit me.
No, well, it's no problem.
I'm just dropping by to see how you are.
That's normal.
Also, I wanted to know, you know, uh, you still owe me 500 euros.
If I could maybe have them? Yeah.
Of course.
Since I was in the area, I figured - It's all good.
Yeah, yeah.
- best not to drag it out, you know? I only have 100.
- Come by tomorrow? - Okay.
Thanks.
Hold on.
Would you like to stay for a while? I don't know.
 A game of FIFA, a blunt Just chill.
No.
Sorry, Bling.
I have to go.
Next time.
Okay.
Call me? - And we'll hang out? - Okay.
Ahh! Motherfucker! - You okay, bro? I'm so sorry.
- Ahh! I think you broke my tooth.
No way! - Where's the piece? Where's the piece? - Ow, fuck, Bling! You got it? Don't move.
Oh! There it is.
Fuck! We have to put it in milk.
I look like I'm fucking homeless.
I can't go to work looking like this.
Come on.
Let's go see my brother.
He's a dentist.
No, forget it.
I can't afford it.
Dentists cost a bundle.
He's my brother.
It's cool.
- Take this for the pain.
- Thanks.
You're taking one too? Are you in pain? It's morphine.
I like it.
You gave me morphine? Wait, I've never taken any before.
Morphine is really strong stuff! Come on, dude.
Relax.
It's really smooth.
Trust me.
Let's go cruisin' to the park Cruisin' after dark Let's go out See, with Super Schlag I had success, money People stopped me in the street to talk.
Even girls came to hit on me without me having to do anything.
Then we opened the club with my sister, and I got others to play.
And suddenly I fucking didn't get what happened.
One day I woke up, and you were all better than me.
I shit you not.
Isn't that insane? Even Malik is better than you.
Whereas he was so shit when he first showed up.
He wasn't funny at all.
And I'm mostly remembered for my role as the funny Chinese guy in Super Schlag.
And I'm not even Chinese.
Everyone knows you're actually Moroccan.
Look at your face.
You look like my cousin Hamid.
Fuck.
Stop making me laugh, you bastard.
No, I swear, bro.
I've lost my mojo.
I don't even know why I'm performing anymore.
Talk about that.
About what? In your stand-up act.
Talk about that.
Token Chinese guy.
Losing fame.
Being afraid people don't love you anymore.
The drugs, the bird, the moray eels, your sister No.
I'm not sure I could do that.
- Yeah.
- That's your thing.
You turn shit into gold.
But me, I just Yo, you move an eyebrow and people laugh.
That's a gift, buddy.
It's a gift.
Did you say "buddy"? - Thank you, Doctor.
Goodbye.
- Bye.
Have a nice day.
How are you? Come along.
Follow me.
Corinne told me you were taking a break from the club? If you want, you can come work here, with me.
- Célia, when's your maternity leave? - Um, in a month.
Hmm.
Hey, Nassim, right? - Nezir.
- Nezir.
We're done here.
So who's this handsome fella? He's such an ass.
Hey, if you do that onstage, no wonder your career is going down the toilet.
Mmm.
How was it with the babysitter? Do you like Sarah? Hmm? Is she nice? Finish your yogurt, sweetheart.
Alright? I don't want any more.
Careful.
Or I'll call Apolline.
Not Apolline.
She sucks.
- You're exaggerating.
- She really sucks.
She's nice and funny though.
- Yes, but Sarah is better at playing.
- Ahh! You know who would be awesome to play with, sweetheart? Mm-mm.
A little brother or sister.
But the problem, my love, is that little brothers and sisters take up all the space.
Then we can't play with you anymore.
- Don't you think that's too bad? - Mmm.
- However, the wonderful thing is - Hmm? is that you get a new friend for the rest of your life.
Yes, but a friend with whom you must share your room.
And your toys.
Well, that's awesome for sharing secrets.
Or for killing each other.
You never know.
Hmm? Because I don't have anyone to talk to and play with in in front of me.
- Of course.
- You like that? - In my bed.
- So There.
So a little brother or little sister would be great.
- It would be so, so great! - It would be awesome.
My boss asked me, "Fanny, where do you see yourself heading in the next few years?" I told her, "Depression.
" And it's the only time she believed in me.
But, speaking of depression, uh, I recently tried to use Tinder.
But I really suck at it.
One thing, when I see someone's profile, and I see, "I'm looking for some fun," I send him a video of one of my routines.
I mean, a view is a view, hmm? And I also suck at Tinder because I don't get innuendos.
I don't understand it.
In fact, if a guy tells me at 11:00 p.
m.
, "We could go to your place.
Let's play FIFA," I get the joysticks out.
Half an hour later, I'm confused for my life with a dick in my mouth, "Which team do you wanna be?" Thanks a lot, my friends.
Thank you very much.
My name is Fanny Ruwet.
Now, make some noise for the next act, Aïssatou Gambaré! Good evening, all! Good evening.
 Good evening.
I'm the mother of a three-year-old girl.
And so, uh, when I was pregnant, people said to me, "You'll see.
It brings only joy.
" Mmm, but the problem is that after you deliver it, and people never tell you that you now have an infant.
And that child doesn't share your life projects.
No, no.
And it's not like you can leave and say, "Listen, I'm realizing you and I are very different, so I'd rather we leave it at that.
" Huh? When my daughter was a baby, she cried so much in the evening, I felt like I was trying to put a politician to sleep during a rally.
No, but for real.
It was impossible.
The worst is when you leave the hospital and you're on maternity leave, and people come visit you at home.
They're all fresh, clean and well-groomed.
While you haven't slept in 20 days.
You look like you just wrestled a train and lost.
Your PJs are now a part of your body, literally speaking.
Your hair No, I won't talk about the hair.
It's This could house a family of pigeons, but like, easily.
And you know what? This is crazy.
My boyfriend had the nerve to ask me if we could make another baby.
First of all, I told him, "Can I make another baby?" No, but Yes, yes, he was very supportive.
He encouraged me.
Yes, it's true.
But it's like running a marathon with your boyfriend on a scooter shouting, "Go, darling! You're almost there.
" Then he gets back to you a few months later, saying, "Uh, we could do another marathon.
" "We're good.
" Anyway, thank you very much.
I'm Aïssatou Gambaré.
- What do you think? - I'm okay with it.
I am.
I mean, look.
It's excellent.
- It's hot.
- Hello.
Hello.
Listen, I'm really sad we had a fight, Nezir.
I'm really sorry.
- What's this? What do you have there? - It's nothing.
- Hi.
Aïssatou? - Yes? Sorry to interrupt.
I'm Anna Leguen, - creator of the podcast Raise Your Fist.
- Yes? And I'd love to have you on for our special on racialized women.
- It's an hour long.
- Yeah, okay.
Would you mind sending me an email or I don't know - Contact to me on Insta? - Yeah.
On Insta? - Okay, let's do that.
Got it.
- Perfect.
Thanks a lot.
- I'm sorry.
- No, no.
No problem.
Now that you're Nakache and Toledano's new muse Oh, stop it with that.
- Excuse me.
- Yes? Mind if we do a selfie? Yeah, of course.
Thanks.
It's for my sister.
Okay.
Could you do something, like, funny? - Like what? - I don't know.
Something funny.
- Thanks.
- You're welcome.
Okay, thank you.
That was cool.
Hey, Nezir, you were really, really on fire today.
- Thanks.
- Mmm! So, next Saturday evening, who do we have? What do we got? Yeah, Élisabeth Borne, Secretary of Labor.
Fine.
And then Aïssatou Gambaré, the buzzing comedian.
- Fine.
One more.
Cool.
- I love that girl.
- Great.
Come on, get to work.
- By the way, Nezir, you know her, right? Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
She's, uh, she's a friend.
That's awesome.
Yeah? Yeah, I mean, honestly, it means I might not be the best pick to make jokes about her.
- I'm sorry.
- Really? Why not? Well, uh, given that we know each other.
Hang on, excuse me.
No, but Go ahead.
Please, go ahead.
- It's not important.
- Can we talk a minute? Sure, if you want.
- Great, then.
Come in.
- Thanks.
Make yourself comfortable.
Thanks, we're good.
Yeah, Nezir, it's Aïssa again.
I was calling to talk to you about something, but I understand.
I know I let you down.
Well, I hope we can meet up soon.
Maybe even at Tifflot's TV show? Right? I'm nervous about it.
I'm kind of nervous, but Laurent says it's imperative, so, there.
Besides, if you work there, it can't be that awful.
- Thank you so much.
I'm Aïssatou Gambaré! - Oh, man, her sketch has a million views.
That is huge, man! Mmm-hmm.
So you two are super close, basically? - Yeah, we know each other really well.
- Hmm.
You want a whiskey? No, thanks, I'm good.
So, yeah, tell me everything.
Well, uh, she actually started out - a bit before me.
- Yeah.
And, um, then she took a long break when she had her daughter.
- She has a daughter? - Yeah, yeah.
She's three.
- Okay.
- She's super cute and all.
What about the dad? Is he cool? Well-known? He's a very cool man.
He's not famous at all.
He's a teacher.
- What does he teach? - He teaches history and geography.
- Okay.
- He just finished his thesis.
I see.
Is he white or is he Black, uh He's dark-skinned.
I see.
I mean, it must have been hard for him.
I mean, it's very personal.
- The About the sketch? - It must've been hard to live down, no? It wasn't easy at first, it wasn't.
But, honestly, it's better now.
 I think Can you imagine her family in Bamako, when they'll come across the video on YouTube.
Yeah, it's a complicated culture.
Oh, Pistachio.
Thank you.
That's all from me.
I'm Apolline.
I have a friend who takes ages to make a decision.
I swear, he can't choose.
- I think he's gonna pass out - That was great, girl.
Yeah, it was funny.
Actually, I just don't get it.
Usually, when I say, "Who they can order around," you know? - Yeah? - People always laugh.
But, weirdly, tonight, they didn't.
Come on.
They laughed a little.
But usually it works really well.
Yes, but tonight, I think you said it too soon.
Last time, you took your time more on, "Who they can order around.
" That's true.
Get to the bottom of your joke.
Act it out.
You know, acting it out is essential.
Thank you very much.
That's all from me.
Thank you.
Did you send your video to the Laundromat? What's the Laundromat? - You don't know the Laundromat? - No, I don't know the Laundromat.
It's a cool place to perform.
You have to send them a video.
I've tried three times and never been selected.
WWW.
LAUNDROMATCOMEDYCLUB.
COM THE LAUNDROMA SEND FILES - Hey, hey, hey - You and me - My, my, my, my, my, my, my, my - You and me Nobody, baby, but you and me If the stars don't shine If the moon won't rise If I never see the setting sun again You won't hear me cry This I testify Please believe me, boy You know I wouldn't lie A STREETCAR I'm just saying that A STREETCAR NAMED NEZIR If I needed advice, I'd ask you.
So, thanks.
- You just did.
- I asked you to write with me.
"Good evening, ladies and gentlemen.
" - "Are there any parents in the room?" - I hate it.
Start by asking, "Are there any parents?" You have too much ego to write with others.
What's with the flowers, Nezir? What are you doing? Christ, it looks like you're in Morocco.
- No, stop doing that.
- No, smile less.
No teeth.
WANT TO MEET UP TONIGHT? Of course, sure.
 But where? Because my dad feels a bit too much at home in his own house.
I prefer when you balance the books.
Well, my parents are refusing to retire and grant me the exclusive rights to their apartment, those selfish assholes.
STUDIO IN DOWNTOWN PARIS PRETTY ROOM FOR TWO BOOK NOW €63 PER NIGH RESERVATION CONFIRMED PRETTY ROOM FOR TWO WAIT.
I JUST BOOKED A ROOM AT THE GRAND AMOUR HOTEL! Aw, fuck.
OH, GREAT! I HOPE YOU HAVEN'T PAID.
NO, DON'T WORRY.
YOUR RESERVATION IS CONFIRMED CANCEL Mom, are you alright? Yes, yes.
I'm resting.
Okay.
Well, I'm off.
Don't wait up for me tonight.
Okay.
Have fun.
Yes.
Thank you.
Um, you too.
THE DRÔLE COMEDY CLUB So, 189 euros, plus two breakfasts.
229 euros, please.
No, no.
It's on me.
- Are you sure? - Yes.
It's my pleasure.
If you don't mind.
Thank you.
- Thank you.
- I love being a kept man.
It's my Oriental gigolo side.
Enjoy, then.
Good night.
It's my dad.
Can I answer? Alright? I'll be right there.
- Yeah, Dad.
- Hello, Nezir.
Where did you put the money? I told you, I'll pick it up tomorrow.
What will I tell the bank? Just because you work in television doesn't mean we no longer have debts.
Okay, uh, Dad, I promise I'll get it tomorrow, okay? Oh.
Okay, okay.
- I have to go now.
I'll talk to you later.
- Right.
See you later.
Wow.
Basically, you brought me to a perv's love nest.
Cool, right? I've never been in this room.
And the others? Yes.
A few years ago, I had an affair with a married man, so I've been in lots of hotel rooms.
I see.
So what are the other rooms like? Dungeons? And, um Who Who exactly is Victor to you? He's a guy I sleep with occasionally.
I mean he's kind of boring, but Well, not enough for it to be disagreeable.
I see.
Cool.
Does it bother you? Oh, no, no, no.
I myself have a wife and two kids, so who am I to judge? Sometimes you look straight out of a painting.
I'm going to masturbate.
Okay.
I'm gonna come.
Damn, I got lost.
This place is hell to find, yo! - How's it going? - Good.
You? - Yeah, I'm chill.
- Good.
- Here's your cash, bro.
- Thanks.
So then, what's the surprise? - What is this place, Nez? - Relax.
- Nez.
- Relax! - Hi, Nezir, how are you? - How are you, Samantha? Nezir is here.
- They're waiting for you.
- You perform here? No, this is where you're performing.
No, I'm not.
Forget it.
What kind of shit plan is this? Hello, everyone! - How are you? - Great! I'm really happy to see you again.
- Today, I have a surprise.
- Ah! I'd like to introduce you to a comedian friend - No way! I'm not going out there.
- who came here just for you.
He's a hugely talented young man.
Please, here's Bling! Hey.
- Hello, people.
- Hello.
How are you? Oh, cool.
Oxygen tanks.
- I love them.
It's classy.
- Yes.
- Were you that guy in The Big Blue? - No.
Well, anyway, my name is Bling.
I'm from Vietnam.
My parents I guess for you, it's Indochina, huh? Hmm.
You, sir, what's your name? Emile.
Okay, Emile.
And the Checkmates? No? The band? "What Do You Make Those Eyes at Me For?" Hmm.
You good? What's your name? Roger.
Okay, so you are the one who speaks for everybody.
You're kind of the head of the retirement home Mafia.
There we go! Wait, wait.
Roger, your wheelchair is beautiful.
I'm so impressed! Hey, that must be the Ferrari of wheelchairs, right? Hey, with a fireball like that, you must be popular with the ladies, right? Whew! I'm very happy to be performing for you today.
Because, when I woke up this morning, I looked in the mirror and I felt old.
But when I see you, I feel much better.
I'm thinking, "Hey! I'm doing fine!" And you, ma'am.
You have such a lovely smile.
You're gorgeous.
Are you always like that? I love it.
And at night, off it goes, you put your smile away in a glass.
Bloop! Dude, it's been so long since I felt so, I don't know useful, I guess.
You know? Thanks a lot, Nez.
Telling me that Yes, you're telling me Ain't no love to be found Underground Now you're wanting to know How comes the music Just erupts so? - Hello.
- Hey.
Hi.
Apolline, right? - Yeah, that's right.
- Okay, cool.
You're early.
That's rare.
Uh, you can put your things in dryer 23, if you want.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
Hey, excuse me, so where's the stage? The stage? Well, ah Well, it's right here.
Oh no, don't worry.
People sit on the floor.
We put away the baskets, the chairs, and we can easily get 20 people in.
- You okay? - Yeah, yeah.
Sure.
- Okay.
- Okay.
So, I was basically totally hazed.
This is the Laundromat? Well, I thought it was a bar or a theater.
I mean, yeah, I have to admit.
"The Laundromat.
" Doesn't give it away at all.
Oh, stop it.
I also invited all my girlfriends.
I'm so embarrassed.
But everyone starts out here.
They tell us that man's first sentence on the moon was, "That's one small step for man, one giant leap for mankind.
" No, I don't buy that.
For one thing, when I go to a stylish hotel, I'm all, "Wow!" So, if I get to the moon, "Whoa!" No, something's off here.
I'd get excited, I'd take Snap out.
"Are we on the moon or what?" No.
Something's wrong.
Michael Collins was the third man who went to the moon, and they say that he stayed inside the spaceship.
Like, yeah right.
What's the deal? You go to a club with your friends, then you stay in the car? So you're basically an Uber.
"Thanks for the ride, Michael.
Five stars.
" No.
Oh, they wanted a guy to stay inside the spaceship.
They were just scared.
They figured, in the excitement everyone would run out of the ship, and when they got back, they'd be like, "Guys, who has the keys?" "Who has the keys? Motherfucker!" Thanks for listening.
I had a great time with you guys.
Ladies and gentlemen, let's keep this energy going and give it up for our next act please, Apolline.
Make some noise for Apolline.
Go, Apolline! I love alcohol.
It makes me do things, uh Over-the-top things.
- That I'm ashamed of sometimes.
- She's so fearless.
I can't believe it.
I was at a party and I wasn't feeling great.
There was something spoiled in what I had to eat or one of the two liters of vodka I had to drink.
Uh, I couldn't find my jacket.
You know when you go to a party and the host tells you, "Put your jacket on the bed.
" So you put your jacket on the bed, and then 50 other people arrive, and they put their jackets on the bed.
You live in Paris and everyone's wearing the same jacket.
So there.
So I was looking for my jacket, like a normal person, on all fours, throwing other peoples' clothes behind me like a dog digging a hole.
And, um, I learned something, actually.
Maybe you already know.
When you feel nauseous, you should not put your head upside down.
So, since everything poured out before I could find my jacket, I had to improvise.
I opened the pocket of the jacket I was holding, and I threw up inside of it.
The floor was this gorgeous Hungarian wood, so, honestly, throwing up inside the pocket of a jacket wasn't being gross.
It was just good manners.
And since I'm not a monster, I put on that jacket, and I left with it.
So I had this trickle of vomit dripping down my leg, and It's okay.
It's pretend.
There's nothing here.
It's fake, imaginary vomit.
The only time I did something worse, I was sober, and I threw up on a dick.
And so, since I'm not a monster, I put on that dick, and I left with it.
That's not possible.
I'm sorry.
Excuse me.
Mom! - Mom, wait! - Shh! I can't.
Stop it.
I wanted to tell you! Did you hear them laughing? And you, leave us alone! You did enough wrong, dragging my daughter into this disaster! He didn't do anything! I can't believe it! "He didn't do anything.
" No one ever does anything! No one ever sees my point.
I'm sorry.
I don't know you anymore.
You think you know people, but you don't.
Even your own child.
Nothing but lies.
I tried to tell you about it, but I couldn't.
You cheated on your exams.
Mm? You lied to me.
You betrayed me.
I knew it all by heart.
I don't even know why I cheated.
And after that, I was too ashamed to tell you, and so An entire life spent giving you everything.
Everything.
Music.
Painting.
Theater.
All of that, so you can go say disgusting things in a laundromat.
I mean But I can't help but love stand-up.
It's very hard to explain.
I myself don't really understand why.
Well, I'll tell you why.
When I saw you there, I understood immediately.
You're like me.
Hmm? What you're going through is a manic phase.
Suddenly, you want or say whatever you want.
That's not it.
Writing whatever you want.
Here.
"I'm so used to her drug-smelling breath that I can analyze every pill that she's taken.
" What are you doing? Stop it! "Why do little girls sing and sway when they're playing?" "Who else sings and sways when they're playing?" - You have no right! Stop it! - "Psychopaths.
" It's in writing! In the beginning, I also used to write a lot.
I also experienced this excitement, this desire, to speak to the world.
Stop making everything about you! This is for your own good! You are making me crazy! I can't do this anymore! We're gonna see Dr.
Spitzer.
- Shut up! I can't take this anymore! - No, listen.
- I'm saying - Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! - Listen to me! - Shut up! Shut up! - We just need to go see, uh - Shut up! Shut up! - Shut up! - Doctor Fitz I can't even remember his name.
Wait a minute.
Are you okay? - Do you need help? - I'm fine.
But I'm telling you, this is it.
I left.
I've got nothing left.
I'm starting over.
Calm down.
Are you homeless? Where are you? Are you serious? I'm not homeless.
I'm in the attic room.
You thought I was out on the street? Okay.
Alright.
Yeah, okay, so when you start over, you really go for it.
Let's talk later.
The show is starting soon, okay? Okay, okay.
Lots of love.
- You okay? - Yeah, I'm fine.
Yeah, yeah.
I'm fine, but I'm just a little tense here.
It's gonna be fine, babe.
Don't worry.
Don't let them intimidate you.
- Hello? How are you? - Hi, you.
- Can we talk? - You will kill it, don't worry.
- Trust me.
- Okay.
No worries.
Okay.
See you later.
By the way, I wanted to tell you.
I thought about it.
About the baby.
Well, you're gonna make more money for one thing.
So we'll be able to get a new place.
And that's awesome.
Um, there won't be a big age gap with Mariama.
Yes, but this isn't the time.
This is stressing me out even more.
- Come on.
- Okay with the eyes? I'm injecting order into the chaos so you don't have to stress out.
And I also spoke to my mom.
She'll be able to help us - since she works part time.
- You spoke to your mother? - You know - You spoke to your mother? What is wrong with you? Could you stop pushing this? Vlad, I don't want this child.
Do you understand that? You're throwing this at me, just like that? Because you won't stop pushing.
I keep telling you, but you won't listen.
- But you wanted this child, didn't you? - No, no, no.
You wanted it.
I just let you convince me because I love you.
But just thinking again about diapers, bottles and bronchitis, it just makes me want to die.
Sure, because, I mean, Mariama is a burden for you.
That's a horrible thing to say! No, Vlad, I love my daughter, but I put everything on hold for her for two years.
But right now, can I direct my energy into something other than making a child? Vlad? Vlad? Um, Aïssatou? You're up next.
You okay? If there's a question you don't like, you don't care.
- Okay.
- Right? You defuse it.
Deactivate it.
Don't answer.
Yeah.
Okay, right.
Yeah.
And stay Are you with me? - Yes, yes.
Yeah.
- You stay funny.
- Right? - Right.
- Playful, fun, glass of wine.
- Thanks.
- Girlfriends, Paris in the sun.
Okay? - Yeah.
- And just smile, okay? - Okay.
Yeah.
You got this.
And now, let's welcome a young woman who is as funny as she is bold, Ms.
Aïssatou Gambaré.
- Good evening.
- Evening.
- Evening, and welcome, Aïssatou.
- Thank you.
Not only is she funny, but she's also magnificent.
Oh, well, thank you.
You're not so bad yourself for your age.
Thank you, thank you.
So, Aïssatou, I'm very happy to have you here.
Just like everyone else, I saw your famous video.
Don't be offended if I don't shake your hand.
That's that, huh? Oh dear.
So, you created a buzz with, uh, this sketch about prostate pleasure.
You know what? I suggest we watch it right now.
A segment of it.
No, it made him so happy, I'm telling you.
I don't understand why we waited so long.
Me and my boyfriend actually went to Thailand before going to his butt.
I'm not getting any feedback.
Can you cue me at the end of the reel? Yeah, here we are.
Ready? Four, three, two, one Yeah, so, Aïssatou Gambaré, you've been a comedian for several years now.
You took a pretty long break after your daughter's birth.
- That's right.
Mm.
- I have it right so far? And then you tried to get back onstage, but it wasn't actually working out.
That's the way it was until this sketch, which was a hit.
It was pretty amazing.
So, my question is, was that really the goal from the beginning? To shock people? An actual intention to what, to generate a buzz? Well, no, it actually wasn't planned.
- Yeah? - It just happened.
And, I mean, can a finger up the butt be that shocking? Really? What about the vulgar humor we hear on the radio? - People are used to worse.
- What are you talking about? I think it can be quite convivial.
A very good atmosphere.
For him, a good atmosphere equals vulgar.
- That's another matter.
- Go for her throat.
Still, don't you think comedy is in bad shape, Aïssatou? Don't you think it's harder nowadays to express yourself? We feel it here every Saturday.
We can't say anything.
No, no.
I disagree.
There have never been so many humorists in this country.
- Yeah, yeah, fine.
- And there are all kinds of people too.
Truly.
And the standards of humor are evolving.
- Really, I swear it.
- Yeah, so - That's just being politically correct.
- Think so? I mean, there are lots of jokes we can't tell anymore.
What kind of jokes do you mean? - Racist jokes? Huh? Anti-Semitic? - Oh, fuck! Misogynistic? It's not such a big deal, is it? Do you miss those jokes? - No, I'm staying out of this.
- Come on.
Christian? Christian? Nathalie? I mean, you're a woman, you're Black, and you talk about sex.
- That's easy and topical.
- Exactly.
Well, if it works, I mean, good.
I'm not complaining.
It's all cool.
By the way, Aïssatou, there's a question we're dying to have you answer.
We really want to know.
What does your boyfriend think about all this? - I wouldn't like to be in his shoes.
- It isn't an easy situation.
He hasn't said anything? No, because based on what I've been told Hang on, this is a crazy story.
So, your boyfriend wasn't aware of the sketch.
He found out about it over social media.
So he was furious, up until then It's understandable.
You decided to delete the sketch.
Only, when you saw how many views it got, and the amazing buzz this sketch was generating, you left it online.
Frankly, it's hard to live with a comedian.
I don't know who your source is, but they're very badly informed.
Oh yeah? No, honestly.
No, no.
My boyfriend is very happy for me.
No, he even encouraged me to talk about this, so He's actually my greatest supporter.
But thank you for caring.
I feel like you're a little emotional, Aïssatou.
Am I wrong? No, I'm fine.
I mean, I don't know.
Philippe Tifflot worrying about my relationship.
Uh, it's It's quite touching.
I mean, isn't this your third marriage? Or divorce? Should we talk about it? Are we worried? Alright, her name is Aïssatou Gambaré, ladies and gentlemen.
Every Thursday, Friday, and Saturday evening at 9:00 p.
m.
at the Palais des Glaces.
And take note, on July 12 at the Olympia.
Bravo and thank you for joining us.
- Thank you all.
- Thank you.
Thank you very much.
Thanks.
- Yeah.
Hang on a sec.
- This is your dressing room.
- I'll let you remove your makeup.
- Thanks.
- Aïssa, I'm really sorry - Happy? You took your revenge? Spilling my life like that to that jackal? No, not at all.
Did you hear what that guy said to me? I never should have gone on this show.
No, really.
I swear, you handled it like a champ.
- Yeah, right.
- No, you did.
I was impressed.
Me! Stop it, Laurent.
I was humiliated in front of three million people.
No, you had a good comeback.
You were funny, smart, really.
Yeah, I can already hear people buying their seats on the networks, you know? Tic, tic, tic, tic.
Oh! Olympia's website.
Tic, tic, tic, tic, tic, tic, tic, tic.
Come on.
Huh? - Yeah, you're right.
- Go on.
Thanks, Laurent.
- You were great.
- Right.
Mmm! Welcome to my palace.
Wow! Honestly, I like this more than the Grand Amour hotel.
The black walls didn't really flatter my skin tone.
I can't believe I ended up here.
It's miniature.
- But I also feel like it's huge.
- Mmm.
It's huge, like everything awaiting us.
Are you okay? Yeah, I'm okay.
I'm okay.
No, I can see you're not okay.
What's the matter? You're the first girl I've ever been with who does that.
I'm not used to it.
You're not used to it, or you don't like me doing it? I feel useless.
Wait, there's no competition between my hand and your dick.
It's a collaboration.
An artistic one.
I do that because I feel comfortable with you.
It's true.
Yeah, but you don't really need me.
You know? You know? I mean I'm not useful.
You're full of it.
- Ever since I met you - Mmm? I've sabotaged my studies, I've started doing stand-up, and I left my mother's place.
You pushed me to revolution, Nezir.
Come my love Come and shine with your light on me Come and play With the chimes in the belfry Come with me and hold me in your arms Let me feel Your tenderness and your warmth - When the rain - Oh, that was That was good.
- Yeah, it was wonderful.
- is falling hard And the storm is far from over Damn it! I Oh, I think I lost my tooth again.
- What? - My tooth.
Huh? - Did I lose it again.
- Oh no.
- Oh no.
I think I swallowed your tooth.
- Huh? - I swallowed it.
- What? - Are you sure? - Yes.
Earlier.
I'm sure of it.
I felt something.
It's no big deal.
You swallowed my tooth.
- Yeah, you did! - Oh my God! Let me show you now I long to hear your voice 'Neath the night forlorn And to gaze for a while Into your eyes reborn And though my mind sometimes Gets weak and cold You'll remain like a song In my heart and soul When the rain is falling hard, oh And the storm Is far from over My lady love, that's you You give me warmth in the night You take away my sadness Whoa My lady darling, it's true I give my world to you Let me show you