Tangle (2009) s01e05 Episode Script

ALLY: Unintended consequences are outcomes that are not what you intend in a particular situation.
Vince thought he was going away with his best friend, and then suddenly you bring some woman along that we don't even know.
It was a last-minute thing.
No way.
Hello.
NAT: It's all so complicated, isn't it? You and Vince and Ally, the girlfriend.
Romeo, don't be such a freak.
The law is that each cause has more than one effect The police.
Hide! Come on.
and these effects will invariably include at least one unforeseen side effect.
MAN: Out you get.
Oh, the kids have snuck out.
They've broken into someone's house and they're having a party there.
How long does it look like I've been stressed out? A few months.
Hey, do you have to be married to be monogamous? What's weird is that the side effect is potentially more significant than any of the intended ones.
VINCE: How many breaches? MAN: At least 12.
At least 12.
You know what? Fuck you, you pasty piece of shit, you little comb-over, beige, boring fucking idiot.
My hands are tied.
Not yet.
No, they're not.
Not yet they're not.
Are you threatening a council official? Because that is a crime.
Hey! Hey, look.
Hey, you know what the problem is? Yeah, you haven't followed regulations.
No, I'll tell you what the problem is.
A little bit of fucking home truths for you, mate.
It's people like you and it's bullshit like this that slowly bleeds people trying to make a living.
I'm trying to employ people.
I'm trying to build something to death.
And you know what? People are going to lose money.
They're going to lose jobs, families are going to go hungry, and do you know what the worst part of it is? You'll get to go home, put your spindle cock in your mousy wife, knowing that you're going to do the same thing to someone else next week.
30 days to fix the breaches, fines payable in 21.
(YELLS) I told you to have that stuff covered up! Fuck me.
It's your own fault.
You've all lost your jobs.
Heard you got arrested.
Questioned is different to being arrested, Nat.
I'm the last person you need to tell that.
So what happened? I called Max but his phone's off.
Is he OK? Yeah, he's fine.
His daddy showed up and next thing we know we can go.
Power of being the man, I guess.
Ooh, lucky you.
Well, I've always been lucky.
They said on the news his finger had been cut off.
Did you guys do that? No.
It was like that when we got there.
Did I mention the guy was a paedophile? Fuck, you're a liar.
Piss off! It's funny.
You're better looking than Max, but he's a lot smarter than you, don't you think? He's a cock jockey.
That's all he is.
(LAUGHS) Yeah.
I mean, everyone says that about the guys they're threatened by.
I'm not threatened by Max.
I remember school.
You look like you are.
You're going red on your neck and face.
I'm playing basketball, Nat.
Only on the driveway.
It's not even hot.
You're so red.
You must be so threatened by him.
Shut up, Nat.
(SIGHS HEAVILY) What happened to you? Two weeks with no phone, no internet and no hanging out with friends.
My mum's a psycho.
Harsh.
Yeah, they took my phone too.
I mean, no phone.
Seriously, it's cruel.
Maybe I'll just get us a homing pigeon.
And send me notes? Exactly.
Great idea.
You rowing? Yeah, I'm allowed that because that's important and character-building.
See ya.
See ya.
(GRUNTS) You even make Anzacs? Yes.
Good ones.
You're amazing.
Don't be so patronising.
So you're on a show.
What is it? Well, you know 'So You Think You're So Gifted'? You're in that? No.
Why are we talking about it? It's a show about that.
It's like me doing backstage interviews, riffing stuff.
So you're on a show? Well, it's a download to phones.
Phones? Mmm.
People watch it on their phones.
Why would they do that? These are burnt.
Hey, kick any corpses lately? Dad says you're moving out soon.
Well, your dad's an optimist.
Mm-hm.
You'll be late for school.
Whatever.
Hey, can I have my phone back yet? No.
How's he gonna watch my show? ROMEO: You're on a show? ALLY: No.
Yes.
Mum, seriously.
Point made, OK? We fucked up.
Romeo! Screwed up.
But the cops let us go.
The guy was a paedo, alright? We were out of our depth.
We were grounded already.
Isn't that enough? I don't know that it is.
I mean, can you look me in the eye and tell me that you're telling the truth? (GIGGLES) I'm serious.
ROMEO: Mum.
Did you guys cut the finger off? I wouldn't do that, Mum.
Well, someone did.
Where is it? Come on Mum, chill out.
Do you have it? It was in his room.
You're a freaking liar.
I touched it.
It was really gross.
Can I have butter on my Anzac? Who said you could go in my room, Gigi? Romeo, come back here! You've got his phone.
Check his messages.
No.
I would.
Well, that's how I know not to.
I told you I couldn't find anything.
Billy.
Timmy.
Looking for yourself? Oh, such vanity, Timmy.
Let's go for a walk.
Sounds ominous.
It must be some aura about me.
Nobody ever seems pleased to see me.
Well, when Premier Tom wants to send a message he usually sends you as the pony express, and you tend to have saddle bags full of shit.
Not today, Timmy.
Nothing but glad tidings and presents wrapped up in shiny paper.
So should I break out the egg nog and put on my pyjamas? Well, people will talk but what the hell? So, Santa Well, Tom wants to send a message.
He wants to reinvigorate the government, send a new rush of blood to the head.
Or at least that's how he wants the press to see it.
You see, there's some ugly stuff coming up in the transport review and they need something shiny to distract from it.
You're it.
Really? Yes, Timmy.
We want to give you Health.
Pat's got Health.
You ever been to Spain? Bullfights? No.
Well, you see, they stab the fuckers, and then they wander round in a daze, still trying to charge at the bullfighter, bleeding profusely from the neck, getting stabbed again and again.
Sickening sight, really.
See, we think that watching Pat in parliament is a similar thing.
(SIGHS) Well, he's had a bad few weeks.
Look, we love him, he's great, and they don't make them like they used to, and respect and blah, blah, blah.
But he's killing us, Timmy.
You want me to tap him.
Who better? Well, someone with no blood in his veins.
You, for instance.
He's my mentor.
He brought me in.
The next big ministry is supposed to go to Hale in the left.
He's a moron.
He's a fucking moron, exactly.
But if we sit around waiting for a reshuffle, he gets it and we can't afford big ministries being run by morons.
After all, this isn't New South Wales.
So you tap him, get him to go quietly, hand over gracefully and it's yours.
All we have to do is move fast before the left get their act together and your faction keeps it, and suddenly you skip five years of school, my boy.
The left will be pissed off.
We'll weather it.
So you're up to it? What if he won't go? You'll think of something.
Merry Christmas.
CHRISTINE: That's one from nowhere.
Yeah.
I'm not usually speechless, but that one got me.
Health? Yeah.
Big.
(CHUCKLES) Yeah.
I mean, do I take it? I mean, Pat brought me in.
He's my friend, for God's sake.
Then don't do it.
Well, they reshuffle anyway and we lose Health and Hale gets it.
I mean, he can't even spell 'health'.
Oh, this is a big shot for you.
When are you going to get the chance again? Five years.
Well, we may not be in government in five years.
Shit is that usually I'd be going to Pat for advice.
You'd be good, Tim.
You would be so good.
You were born for this.
You've worked for this.
You just don't get to be the good guy.
Yeah.
I'd better get back.
Hey, do you want to come to my car and make out instead? Yeah.
But I have to go and make the state a better place for all of us.
ALLY: Romeo.
Romeo, I want that finger and I want an explanation with it.
I haven't got it, OK? Gigi's a liar.
Your track record lately hasn't exactly been reassuring.
I told you.
Why don't you believe me, Mum? How can you act like this? That man is dead and you have his finger.
I told you, we found it near the body, alright? Maybe it was a yakuza thing.
You go to his house.
You have parties.
The man's dead.
I don't get it, Romeo.
I just don't.
How can you act like this? I don't know, Mum.
Maybe I was trying to extract the most fun from the situation.
Hey! Are we done here? You need to think about what you've done, mate, and I think you need an extra week grounded to do that.
PATRICK: Don't look so worried.
You're about to have a bottle of red with an old friend.
Patrick.
I thought we'd go to Punch Lane.
I'd like to, mate, but I've got trouble at the ranch.
What? With the wife or the sprog? Max.
God, he's done some stupid shit.
What? A 15-year-old boy does stupid shit? Yeah, I know, but I'll tell you what's good when you want to come down hard on your kid.
Now, you know they've screwed up and they're waiting for hell to be unleashed.
What? Sudden forgiveness.
Keeps them guessing, makes them feel relieved, grateful, and it makes them feel worse.
How are you feeling? Oh, I've felt worse.
I got hit by a tram once.
Jesus, that hurt.
Why don't you chuck it in? What? You know.
I mean, why do you want the aggravation of all this bullshit? I mean, you could go anywhere, do anything.
What would I do? Go to Rome, New York.
Visit Lynn.
My daughter lives in a cabin in Nebraska with a born-again Christian named Aaron who makes his own bullets.
What would I do? Sit around at night and read to them from the Book of Job? I just I feel like a bad parent.
Darling, you're not a bad parent.
I might be.
You're not.
Oh, God.
What do we do? It's hard with kids now.
They know you can't hit them.
He's lying.
No, he's not.
Really? Yeah, I know.
I usually can tell.
I don't think he is.
God, am I the only one who thinks it's so, so wrong what they did? No.
The cops cleared them, darling.
The guy was a kiddie fiddler.
Yeah, OK.
Just because they got away with it doesn't make it right.
I talked to Christine today.
We thought maybe we should have a meeting.
A meeting? Yeah, a meeting.
All the parents.
(CLEARS THROAT) Isn't this something the school should No, the parents should take respon Everybody else thinks that someone else should be taking responsibility.
I think we should sit down and talk about it.
You don't want me to come to that, do you? You know, 'cause it just seems like something that, you know, you'd be better at than me.
I mean, you are.
You're coming.
Yeah, fuck.
CHRISTINE: What are you thinking about? Pat.
He always taught me that an open window should be jumped through and not stared at until it closes.
Then maybe he'll understand.
If I took Health, how would that make me feel about this situation with Max? I mean, suddenly I'm high profile and more interesting to journalists.
Can't let that stop you.
Hey.
MAX: Hey.
You can watch 'Robot Chicken' if you like.
Really? I thought because One-off reprieve.
Thanks.
Trust me, I'm trying a new level of parenting.
Just because Dougherty wasn't there doesn't mean he doesn't know.
I know.
I know.
Jesus, he lost it.
Well, when an opportunity like that presents itself, I can't let it go.
Cheers.
Hold it in your mouth for a minute.
Well? Actually, it's brilliant.
You're right.
It's probably better if I hadn't already had a bottle of wine and a martini.
(LAUGHS) But who's counting? So you must talk to Sharon.
Love to.
She is the best PR flak in town.
Great.
I need to get myself out there.
You know, position myself.
Oh.
Well, what position were you thinking about? So you'll set something up with Sharon? I will and I'll call you.
Hmm.
So how's Ned? Oh, Ned's a pain in the arse.
But something's going on, though.
Really, why? All these hushed conversations and sneaky texts.
There's no sign of Romeo.
Why is that? Is he grounded? I don't know.
Well, what does Ned say? Ned says (GRUNTS) But I know something's going on.
Mmm.
You could knock.
I could knock your block off is what I could do.
Hey, why aren't you grounded? I wasn't there.
You wasn't there? Well, how about you wasn't be here either? That means get out.
Go.
OK, give me the finger.
Don't even think about that crap.
Just get it for me.
Give it to me.
Turn around.
Did you do this? No.
Who did it? I don't dob.
Alright, good.
Don't be a dobber.
What's up your arse? Sit down.
Don't get smart with me, Rome.
Don't sulk.
Alright, you want to be a man? Don't dob.
That's fine.
But don't sulk about it.
Dougherty, shouldn't you be getting home? But I thought we might fool around a bit.
Subtlety's not your strong point, is it? Well, it's the squeaky wheel that gets the oil.
See ya.
No.
What about a hand job, then? What? Shit.
What's he doing? Um, he's tying his shoe.
Oh, God, you smell good.
Easy, tiger.
Well, what's he doing now? Um, he's lighting a fag.
He smokes, does he? Jesus Christ! Oh, he's making a call.
Dougherty? What? While you're down there Yeah.
What the hell? (GROANS) (NAT GIGGLES) YURI OVER RADIO: Very beautiful.
The water forms into not drops, but perfectly round.
Because of microgravity, it does not pool into a normal shape.
I have to go, Yuri.
NAT: No, no.
Don't mind me.
Hello, Yuri.
What are you wearing? Shut up.
Shut up.
So So you two have made up? We haven't spoken about it.
You went back to your ham radio like nothing had ever happened, that you weren't just standing there in your knickers? That's right.
You're amazing.
So how was your night? Oh, you know, drinks, tapas, publicists, cunnilingus.
(SHRIEKS) You didn't! Do you know what's really weird? He's really fucking good.
That's just so unexpected.
I thought he'd be like a Saint Bernard, you know, searching for a man in a snowdrift.
But no.
No.
It was expert stuff.
(GASPS) He's he's married, Nat.
And I did remind him of that once or twice.
(SNORTS WITH LAUGHTER) I want to keep him.
(LAUGHS) (GROANS) Hey, listen, you're about to be invited to a meeting at our place.
It's just about the kids and shit.
Well, obviously you won't come (EM OVER PHONE) What? Obviously? Don't get shitty.
It's just it's going to be all about, you know, hand wringing, soul searching, shit like that.
I still smell you in my nostrils.
I'll call you later on.
Bye-bye.
Can I just say the health system in this state is a disgrace? VINCE: Sure.
You up early to get some porn surfing in? (CHUCKLES SARCASTICALLY) No, mate.
Government stuff.
Land grants, sales.
I didn't know you did that.
What? Thought about stuff ahead of time.
Oh, you're a funny guy today.
I'm four steps ahead, mate.
I am always four steps ahead.
And small shit I am over.
I've changed the game.
Listen, I'm moving back into my flat.
Oh, that's good.
You get some time to be alone with your with your girlfriend.
Fuck you.
(LAUGHS) I don't have to, mate.
I've got a wife and a girlfriend.
Oh, do you know Did you hear Riewoldt pulled his hammy? No.
Mmm, he did.
No.
Yeah, mate.
I'm sorry.
Yep.
(GROANS) No.
Jesus, who died? Riewoldt pulled a hamstring.
Fucking Melbourne.
Jesus! It's good breakfast at that place.
Yeah.
We've got an exciting day ahead of us.
We have? Yeah.
So did Ned cut the finger off that guy? What? No! I don't know.
Romeo, mate.
You know, when people give three answers to the one question, they're usually lying.
Just a little tip.
Mate, generally you bullshit a treat.
I mean, obviously.
The cops fell for your little fantasy line about that guy.
But you can't fool me, mate.
You can't fool your old man.
I'm too good at it.
What are you going to do? I'm going to have a little bit of fun.
Shut that.
(LOUD KNOCKING) Top of the morning to Jeez, I know it's early, mate, but you look like shit.
You have a big night? Well, you look real good.
Well, you gotta look after yourself.
Well, come in, why don't you? Blokes, gotta look after ourselves.
What have you been doing with yourself? Nothing.
Nothing? That keeping you pretty busy then? Thanks, Bryan.
Oh, hi.
Oh.
Hello, Rachel.
Hi.
I'm off to Pilates, but nice to see you.
Yeah, good to see you too.
You are looking very good.
That's doing you favours, that Pilates.
Thanks.
'Bye.
NED: Well, we're gonna head out to No, no, stay.
Stay.
Stay.
Sit down.
So, Doughboy, what have these boys been up to? I dunno.
I think it's just yours, isn't it? Really? Well, Rachel got a call from Olivia's mum.
Kids on the rampage, dead man, cops.
You know, I wish my son would tell me about such things.
I figured you'd be there, Romeo.
Who else? Who else? Rome? Who else? BRYAN: I guess it's all on the police file.
Yeah, I figured you'd be on to that.
Well, I've got a nose for shit, haven't I? Mmm.
That's my job.
Think I got something of yours, actually, Ned.
What is it? BRYAN: What is it? Oh, Jesus Christ! Alright? See, I figured that you'd sniff this out, it being under your own doorstep and all, and I knew that once you found out that Max was involved you would be all over it, like a man in between a woman's legs in a parked car late at night, you know? So I thought you'd better know just who it is who's the real super-villain of the story.
I mean, assuming there is a story.
He didn't do that.
Did ya? Oh, yeah.
He's got a real little psycho streak to him.
Don't you, Neddy, huh? Why didn't the police haul him in? I don't know.
Can I prove what I'm saying or not, Romeo? Picture of Ned doing it on my phone.
NED: Romeo! Shut up.
You did it.
We're screwed.
You know what? He's good, the kid.
He can take a situation and just reduce it right down to its most basic element.
It's a gift.
But no-one's got anything to worry about as long as we all own our dirty little secrets and we keep them all to ourselves.
What do you say? I say you're an arsehole.
Oh.
Yeah.
That I am.
(MOANS) Oh.
Oh.
(BOTH PANT) Did you hear that Riewoldt did his knee? What? It just popped into my head at the most inappropriate moment.
Sorry.
It was his hammy, anyway.
Listen, could you come to this meeting tonight? (GROANS) I've got a dinner with Pat.
Oh.
What are you going to do? Who knows? Things keep changing from one minute to the next.
(KNOCKING) (LOUD KNOCKING) I'll go.
(KNOCKING) I feel like the Avon lady today.
What's up? He's just got to go and talk to Max about school work or something.
Go on.
So I dropped in on Bryan Dougherty on the way over here.
Jesus, he's a rat-faced prick, isn't he? I don't know what Nat sees in him.
Ticket to ride, I suppose.
What? Yeah, look, it turns out that he's heard all about this thing with the cops and the kids and the whole sorry saga.
Bullshit.
Is that a problem for you, is it? Well, don't be a smart-arse.
How much does he know? Well, he knows that I've got him over a barrel, see, 'cause Ned was there.
He was the one who cut his finger off and I've got the proof.
So if he wants to be publicly hung out to dry with his psychopath son I'm happy to do it.
Holy shit.
See your career flash before your eyes, did you? Yeah, something like that.
Yeah, I saw where it was heading.
I thought I'd better tap it on the head before it sideswiped you.
Thanks.
Takes a village.
Hey, I'm going to I'm going to kick Nat out.
Do you want her? (LAUGHS) What's this? I'm making a voodoo doll of you.
Why are you here? Oh, I dunno.
My dad.
I don't know.
(MAX STRUMS GUITAR) So you seen Charlotte lately? Yeah, yesterday.
Is she alright? Yeah, grounded.
Deprived from all technology.
Yeah, my parents are holding a meeting for the folks later.
Yeah, my mum's going.
Lame.
VINCE: Romeo! Gotta bail.
Catch you at rowing.
(STRUMS GUITAR) What just happened there? Oh, you think about it, mate, and you'll see.
How's it going with girls and school? Fine.
They like a bad guy, and they like to be pushed a little bit beyond their limits too.
OK.
And they like to know they're the one.
No ambivalence, alright? You can't show ambivalence in life, Romeo.
Most people, they're pussies.
They just want someone to give them a handout, throw them a bone, a job, a chance, some sex.
You gotta think about what you want and then you just go and get it.
OK.
You're getting older.
It's time I taught you a few things.
OK.
Stop saying, "OK.
" Oh dear.
(CHUCKLES) Life's a many-splendoured thing once someone shows you how to live it.
You're lucky I'm your old man.
(STARTS ENGINE) Very lucky.
My name is Gabriel and I'm an alcoholic.
(ALLY GIGGLES) Oh, is Charlotte coming with Em tonight? She didn't say.
She just said her mum would be here.
You like her? I might be late.
ALLY: To a meeting in our own house? Yeah, well, I've gotta go see this guy in Frankston about the job.
Everybody else seems to be able to make it on time.
Darling, not everyone else has to go see someone in Frankston.
Sorry.
So how's your apartment looking? Well, there's a stain the shape of a body in the study.
Renters.
I'll buy you a rug.
Thanks.
I'm going to miss you.
It's been fun, you staying.
Yeah.
Yeah, it was.
What does Em think? Thinks it's a peach.
(PHONE RINGS) Hi, Christine.
No, she's at work all night.
MAN: And we're on in five, four, three Greetings and salutations, viewers.
Well, they think they're so gifted, but can they get any action backstage? Well, let's go and see, shall we? I think they're lying their arses off and they got away with murder, frankly.
Really? Well, if Charlotte's anything to go on, the finger's just the start and they were chopping him up for a barbecue.
Jesus.
Doesn't it worry anyone else that he doesn't seem to matter to them? This man was someone, a human being, and they showed him no decent regard or thought.
Apparently not.
I'm just so surprised that Max was involved in something like this.
ALLY: Whereas Romeo's no surprise at all.
I didn't mean that.
No, it's fine.
I was surprised about Max too.
How's Charlotte? A bitch.
I need some red.
It's in the front room.
Help yourself.
Thanks.
GABRIEL: Hi, honey.
Hey.
How's it going out there? Oh, we're veering between "It's the school's fault," a vague feeling of disappointment, and self-Ioathing at our failure as parents and as human beings.
Sounds fun.
Mmm.
Some woman with a pearl necklace called Ramona is getting all Catholic and moral.
I have to keep walking out the room so I don't vomit all over Ally's carpet.
Is this weird for you? I shouldn't have come.
But Vince rang me and told me not to come.
Oh.
Notable by his absence.
Yeah.
And, besides, I'm really worried about Charlotte.
I thought this would be useful.
Oh.
Hey, you two.
GABRIEL: Hey.
So how do you like his flat, Em? She likes it.
EM: Oh, I like it.
ALLY: How did you guys meet? Shouldn't we be getting back in there? No, they're taking a break to denigrate one of the teachers.
(IRISH ACCENT) He's not even a Catholic.
So how did you meet? I always find it so revealing.
EM: Well, It was funny.
GABRIEL: Yeah.
We were at the football Yeah.
and Em was She bought the last pie, and I was standing right behind her so I just said something and (BOTH LAUGH AWKWARDLY) What? What did he say? EM: Um, he said, "Give me that pie.
" Funny.
And what did you say? I said no.
(DOOR OPENS) And we just went from there.
(DOOR CLOSES) You started talking? BOTH: Exactly.
Oh, hey.
How's it all going? You're late.
Yeah.
Oh, I did say I would be late.
Happy couple.
How are we? ALLY: Are you coming in? Yeah, yeah, I'll be there in a sec.
I've just got to do a couple of things.
I'll come.
Define 'grounded'.
I haven't gone yet.
Oh, I was just, you know Yeah, I bet you were.
Maybe don't, considering a breach of trust is not a good idea right now.
Why didn't you go to the meeting? I'm having dinner with Pat.
Can I come? No.
I'll tell him you said hi, though.
Well, tell him I googled the Nixon Library and he was right.
Remember when he told me they had a mural of Nixon surrounded by all these brown children looking up at him, and he was in a trench coat and a suit and he had his hands out, and light was streaming from behind him and he looked like Jesus, and I bet him 10 bucks he was lying? Well, I guess I owe him 10 bucks.
What's that? It's a pigeon.
(HUBBUB) Hey, guys.
Guys, guys, guys.
Hey, hey.
Hey, let's Hey! Let's just try and stop this blame game for a minute, alright, and let's focus on the kids and what's going on in their minds.
I mean, really, you know.
I mean, maybe we should think about doing counselling with them or Why, what did we do wrong? Maybe we could try and find out.
Cops gave the kids a clean bill of health.
I think we're overreacting here.
When I was a kid, I did stupid shit.
I iron-barred someone in the face.
I know a terrific counselling service.
So this is a pitch for business? CHRISTINE: Oh, yeah, Gary.
I've been rubbing my hands together all day.
I couldn't wait.
I've got some Tupperware in the car too if you're interested.
ALLY: No, it'd be great if you set something up.
CHRISTINE: Thank you, Ally.
That'd be great.
She's terrific.
So where's my 10 bucks? He says he still owes you.
He's a good kid.
Let's live a little.
A bottle of the Henschke '92, thanks.
Remember when I took Benny out to tell him he was gone? Ordered Henschke.
No-one can be pissed off at you if you're drinking Hill of Grace, mate? What's going on? (SIGHS) Billy came to see me.
Right.
They want me out.
But you told them to go to hell and that's why we're drinking Henschke, to celebrate your fierce loyalty in an otherwise cold and dark world, right? Pat No.
Oh, Timmy, you got to be kidding me.
Why do they want me out, the gutless swine? How many times have I swung behind that spineless, puffed-up, fish-faced prick Tom? Plenty, mate.
Look, politics is like a merry-go-round You repeat some pithy aphorism to me that I've previously told you, I'll run the steak knife through your heart.
You're bleeding all over the floor, mate, and the opposition are all over it.
It looks bad.
You're all over the shop and we're taking a beating for it.
The only place I'm bleeding is in my bowel.
I've got a year left in me, Tim, and you know that.
You know that.
Are you going to tap me and give it to the left? That dill's got as many brains as a bagful of hair.
The left don't get it.
Hale doesn't get it.
You get it? Yeah.
Of course.
We, the faction, get it.
Yeah.
Who else could turn my group against me? Look, it's It's such a big ministry.
If we lose this You don't get another chance till your pubes turn grey.
Well, the Hill of Grace is probably quite appropriate.
You are celebrating.
Oh, Pat! No, it's OK, Tim.
I like a dusty bottle.
Fair lady, bring it on.
(KNOCKING) (LOUDER KNOCKING) (DOOR OPENS) I broke out.
I thought you would.
Wasn't Leah home? I don't want Leah, alright? I never did.
I was just jealous, OK? Pissed off at Max.
Can we drink these? (TV PLAYS) (PAGES RUSTLE) She's not really your girlfriend, is she? What was that, honey? Em.
She's not your girlfriend.
EM: I just don't get her.
Listen to this.
I read her text.
ALLY: You what? Is that bad? Well, whatever.
Mum used to read my diary.
"The hairy old housecoat is being a broomstick and extra sucking.
"See you at park at 4:00? Bring Breezers.
"P.
S.
Cassie is a total bitched-face ho.
" I don't get the 'housecoat'.
Me.
I'm the hairy old housecoat.
Oh.
Touching, huh? Do you ever think about when they were little? Mmm.
How they never used to let go of your hand? I remember that about Romeo.
He'd always hold my hand when he was talking to me.
They're cute, aren't they? They were.
(LAUGHS) Yep, nine Hawaiians with egg.
Yeah, with egg.
No, that's all.
That's all.
OK, thank you.
Thank you.
(GIGGLES) (LOUD DANCE MUSIC PLAYS) You've got to be kidding! It's alright.
It's alright.
It's alright.
No-one's gonna know.
They will! No-one's gonna hear us.
I missed you.
Oh, yeah.
I'm sure you've been pining.
I have been pining.
You know what else has? My cock.
No.
(MURMURS) Shh.
(GROANS) What the fuck is wrong with you? It's over.
You and me.
You got a condom? Yeah, I've got one.
OK.
You sure? I mean, you people, you really have to take a good look at yourselves There's a pizza guy at the door with nine Hawaiians.
ALLY: What? OK, I'm leaving.
Something I said? Nat.
I mean, parenting is not just expedience and drinking and prying into their stuff, and avoiding the truth of who they are and how they behave.
I mean, it's a lifelong commitment! You can't just decide when you want to do it.
So what are we drinking? EM: I'm going to go too.
Oh, God, I can really clear a room.
Thanks for coming.
Thanks, Ally.
Thank you.
Fuck.
You coming? Yeah, sure.
Good.
See ya.
Thanks, Ally.
See ya.
'Bye! (DOOR SHUTS) (BELL PEALS) Thanks for the dinner.
(SIGHS) I'm sorry, Pat.
Hey.
Fight them with me.
Fuck them.
We can fight them.
PR push on me.
You can do that.
Make it impossible for him.
Just one year, Timmy, that's all I ask.
Just one year, please.
He wants you gone.
You're gone.
Whoa! Pat, you OK? Christ, that hurt.
Are you OK? I'm fine.
Just feeling a little bit foolish at the moment.
(ENGINE STARTS) ROMEO: You alright? Yeah.
Did it hurt? A bit.
Do you want a drink? Yeah.
Hey, it's Max.
(SCOFFS) Do you want to come in? Well, we've told everyone we have.
Maybe we should.
(BOTH LAUGH) Oh, I guess Charlotte's entertaining.
Guess we'll have to postpone, then, won't we? Seriously? (SERIOUS VOICE) I guess we'll have to postpone, then, won't we? (LAUGHS) You have to loosen up.
You should be careful what you wish for.
Ooh.
Hey.
What's up? So what happened? Sex and lots of it.
You didn't do anything.
You better not have.
Ha! (BOTH PANT HEAVILY) An old bald guy just beat us.
He's probably got special shoes.
TIM: It gutted me to see him on his back like that.
CHRISTINE: He knows you had no choice.
I had a choice.
Well, you made it.
And now? I'm going to be a senior minister.
I do believe that's what you've always wanted.
So how was your thing? Oh, I may have made a complete fool of myself.
May have? I think the odds are pretty good.
Hey.
Hey.
Hey, what happened to your lip? I snuck out to Charlotte's last night and she was with Romeo.
They probably had sex and I was upset and kind of angry, so I went next door to try and get with Kelly.
Well, I guess she didn't want to 'cause she hit me in the mouth and called me an idiot, which, curiously enough, at the time was exactly how I felt and still do.
Oh, honey.
(GIGGLES) Good to see I have parents who understand my pain.
I'm sorry.
Sorry.
So how was last night? Did you sort us out? You're going to church and you're going to counselling.
Tell me you're joking, Mum.
NAT: Yes! 'Melbourne Confidential' - "Back in town and bringing a touch of class and daring with her.
" Little shot of me shopping and I do look hot.
They're right.
How'd they know where you were? Oh, it's called a publicist, sweetheart, and every girl should have one.
I'm telling you, Ally, I'm going to turn this job into gold.
So when's it gonna be on TV? It's a 'mobisode'.
It's not on TV.
OK? That's the last time I say it.
(ALLY CHUCKLES) VINCE: Morning.
Tell Romeo he's going to mass.
You're going to church.
Dad! So are you, Vince.
We all are.
See? NAT: I'm not going.
Let's just get that straight right off the bat.
I'd burst into flames if I walked into a church.
Oh, yeah? Well, let's go to church.
MAN: And become partakers of the divine nature.
For this very reason make every effort to supplement your faith with virtue, and virtue with knowledge, and knowledge with self-control, and self Rome? Go open the car and start it up for me, alright? (CLEARS THROAT) So I guess you owe me one, huh?