The Decameron (2024) s01e05 Episode Script
Switcheroo
1
[opening theme music playing]
[music fades]
[crickets chirping]
We can't just stay out here.
We have to panic!
- Sirisco! Get us back inside that villa.
- God!
That crazy axman will chop our heads off.
What would you have me do?
Grow my hands into swords?
- Stop!
- I don't know!
If you do not get us back inside,
I'll scream.
Well, don't look to me for solutions
because it's obvious I have none!
- Stop.
- The chapel.
The keys are inside.
- Fool.
- Okay, please do not be mean to me.
- Then don't be stupid.
- Let's go to the stables.
The stinky stables?
I I I I have a horse intolerance.
And and a wood intolerance.
And I won't tolerate stink!
I have to go back for my wife.
[determined music playing]
I'm gonna save my wife.
Wait
He left his wife in there?
[scoffing] What kind of a man does that?
Panfilo! Man, you can't
You you can't do that, you'll fall.
Fall, Panfilo. Fall!
[men shouting in distance]
[both panting]
[wondrous music playing]
[both grunting]
[both chuckling]
[tunic clattering on floor]
[Neifile giggling]
[Neifile panting]
Are you frightened?
Not really.
- [Neifile giggling]
- [Ruggiero chuckling]
[Ruggiero grunting]
[Ruggiero exhaling]
As soon as I laid my eyes on you, I knew.
That you could have me?
That you wanted to be had.
[both laughing]
[both breathing heavily]
[Neifile giggling, moaning]
Keep climbing, Panfilo.
When your brains are splashed
all over the cobblestones,
you won't have a drop of my sympathy.
Quiet! You'll draw their attention!
Don't tell me to be quiet!
Fine, give us one loud scream.
Let's see what
- [Pampinea screaming]
- [Misia exclaiming]
[Lorenzo] Hey!
We are trying to entertain in here.
[suspenseful music playing]
- [Lorenzo roaring]
- [all screaming]
[Lorenzo chortling]
[door creaking, closing]
[Ruggiero, Neifile moaning]
[Ruggiero chuckling]
[dramatic music playing]
[Neifile moaning softly]
[Neifile breathing heavily]
[Neifile moaning]
[chickens clucking]
[horse whinnying softly]
[music fades]
[door creaking open]
Stop! Intruder! Rapist!
Panfilo.
So, then, you didn't fall to your death
as we'd hoped?
Did you see the brute? Did he slice you?
- I saw him reenter the villa.
- Did you find your wife?
She's able to look after herself.
[Pampinea chuckling]
[Pampinea claps] What a husband.
Oh, speaking of husbands, what a pleasure
it was to meet yours this evening.
I suppose it was your first time
meeting him too.
How did you find him? Quite dead?
- [Tindaro] Did you see the doctor?
- No.
[Tindaro] And what of the Lady Filomena,
my betrothed?
I have something to reveal
that will absolutely devastate her.
- [Stratilia] Ugh.
- She was no lady, Padrone.
- What?
- Filomena was never Filomena.
Well, who was Filomena, then?
- Licisca.
- [Panfilo] The servant.
Where have you been?
Licisca was the servant,
Filomena was the lady.
They switched places
and were both cast out.
[crickets chirping]
Are are you saying
that I am the victim of a switcheroo?
We are all victims. Myself, most of all!
Why were we cast out?
Well
Panfilo thought
it'd be a great and joyful thing
to invite a murderous
band of satanists to our home.
It all started when Pampinea
pretended to be married to
and magically impregnated
by our long-dead host!
The point is,
we are here now because of Panfilo!
The Lady Stratilia
asked why we were all cast out.
Well, we are all here
because Sirisco
desecrated Leonardo's corpse.
So Leonardo wasn't in Venezia?
Are you even pregnant?
Yes! Of course I am pregnant, you monster!
Then who's the father?
[Tindaro muttering]
Must we rehash every moment of history?
What's done is done.
[Sirisco shouting, wailing]
[Sirisco] This whole mess is my fault!
I brought them here!
Good point. It is all your fault.
I thought I finally had a move.
But I'm just an idiot. I'm just an idiot.
- You're not an idiot, you're just stupid.
- Stupid is right.
[Sirisco chuckling]
I agree.
[Sirisco crying] Stupid is right.
[somber music playing]
God, look at us
out here in the cold
no pillow.
My legs will be your pillows.
Your legs are not pillows.
Your legs are legs.
I'm sorry that my legs aren't pillows.
Would that they could be pillows.
We'll try it.
[voice breaking]
I haven't even had my evening snack.
Oh, shut up.
[Tindaro crying]
[crying]
[Pampinea] You should be crying
most of all.
Your wife is trapped
in that house full of murderers
and you couldn't save her.
- Dark, it's dark. It's so dar
- [branch snapping]
- [Filomena screaming]
- Oh my God. Go! Keep going.
Cannot believe I'm out here again.
You have no idea what it's like.
[crying] Freezing cold, dying beggars,
people that love to strangle
beautiful women.
- We are in hell, Licisca. This is hell!
- You are hell.
- Oh.
- Where did that tunnel spit us out?
I should be sat in front of a fire
with my toes so hot they're smoking.
You should have whatever you desire
the moment it occurs to you.
Your reflections on what should be
are always so helpful.
- Where are we even going?
- Where do you think we are going?
We're walking back to Firenze.
Now?
No, I thought we'd just hang around
to see what kind of creatures
kick up around here at this time of night.
[bushes rustling]
[Filomena screaming, crying]
- Oh my Stop it. Shush.
- No, I can't keep walking in the dark!
- Don't make me do it!
- Okay, fine. Fine.
We'll find a place to stay
until it's light.
- Out here?
- [Licisca] We obviously can't go back.
You could. Alone.
[Filomena sniffling]
- How are you so calm?
- [Licisca] I'm not calm.
I'm terrified.
But as usual, your emotions come first.
Currently, you're taking up all the fear.
There's none left for me.
[crickets chirping]
[Filomena] Great.
Darkest place in the woods.
You don't wanna walk,
you don't wanna stop.
I hate this.
I hate this, and I hate you.
Ah. A tantrum. Fantastic.
If your father was here,
he'd roll his eyes out of his head.
It was you and your little game
of dress-up that got us kicked out.
- I saved your life back at the villa.
- Misia saved my life.
If she hadn't spoken,
you would have stayed silent.
I would have spoken sooner.
I I was just timing it out.
This is my side of the cave.
Don't come over here.
Fine.
Why would I when I have
this far superior side of the cave?
Oh look.
A lovely, comfortable, smooth spot.
How lovely.
Thank you for smoothing it, cave troll.
This cave is safe and troll-free.
I hope you're right.
[Licisca sighing]
And I know you think I'm nothing,
just like my father did,
but I'm not nothing.
I never said that,
and nor did he.
[bushes rustling]
Oh, troll's back.
I will kill you.
[animal screeching]
[animal screeching]
[birds chirping]
[wondrous music playing]
[flies buzzing]
- [Neifile screaming]
- [cup clattering]
[sinister music playing]
[Pampinea] Woman, this is the pestilence?
I've never seen it work so fast,
but it must be.
Perhaps the disease is growing stronger.
It's important that we all stay calm.
- Fetch the onions!
- [Panfilo] No, no!
- Dioneo, where are you?
- [lively music playing]
- Oh my God!
- You're too close!
Where's the bird? We need a bird!
Give me an onion! Onion!
Bring the onions.
- Give me your hand, Neifile.
- Jesus!
- [Sirisco grunting, straining]
- [music fades]
- [Misia] Oh here.
- [Sirisco] God.
- [Misia] Let me give you a hand.
- [Sirisco] No, I have it. No.
I can do all this. I have it.
[Misia] Fine. Suit yourself.
Let's go to the gardens, Neifile.
I don't want you in this infested house.
- I've been here all night.
- Yes, I know.
- [door opening]
- You're back! Where have you been?
Just load them on here.
Neifile, offer up a prayer of thanks
to God our deliverer,
who smote down our enemies
and protected us all
in our time of great need.
No
I won't.
You can't tell my wife what to do.
You're not the heir to the villa.
Neither are you.
There is no heir!
Yes, there is.
What?
- On my command.
- This won't work.
- Quiet!
- [shushing]
- [Pampinea] Shush.
- [whispering] My God.
Three,
two,
one.
- What the fuck?
- [both straining]
[Misia] Oh my God.
[scattered grunting]
Hey! None of that!
Oh no! Oh God!
[Panfilo grunting]
[Panfilo] Hit him harder!
- [Sirisco grunting]
- [Ruggiero grunting]
Retreat! Retreat!
- Have you seen the doctor?
- I'm disappointed in you, old friend.
[Tindaro yelling]
[whimsical music playing]
- [Ruggiero grunting]
- [all screaming]
Yes.
Is he all right?
He'll be fine. Let's tie him, quickly.
- Misia, help.
- No, I'm busy.
Oh God, please.
- Doing what?
- Protecting you.
[Sirisco grunting]
We should've begun with violence.
He's still the heir to the villa.
Yes
he is.
And he deserves respect.
The utmost respect.
Misia, get his shirt.
[Misia] Shirt, shirt, shirt
[Sirisco] I need you to move. Move.
Signore Tindaro.
[pensive music playing]
[Sirisco sighing]
[somber, dramatic music playing]
[Pampinea] I can feel him scraping
in there.
Let us calm him
with a few more hither-and-yons.
Grief takes its toll.
- [music fades]
- [birds chirping]
You're so gracious to grieve him.
[Pampinea exclaiming]
Who would I be
if I did not grieve my own husband?
My little love story
is at an end, it seems.
I shall miss it.
I meant Dioneo.
Oh.
Yes, I grieve him too, of course.
Though he was a scoundrel.
They do your son good,
these lovely walks.
I'm sure he can feel
your dedication quite
forcefully.
[Pampinea] And not my distress, I pray.
I detest that nasty man, Panfilo.
Trying to blame anyone but himself
for the mess we're in.
He attacked me repeatedly.
It really was pathetic, no?
He's pathetic, I agree.
As if it was not his own fault
that the murderer invaded my home.
[Misia gasping]
Have I won no allies?
Am I not a grieving widow?
[voice breaking] No one understands.
[tense music playing]
I guess you understand,
to a point.
Was she nice?
Oh yes, she was she was nice.
And she was just so gentle, and she lo
Viscontessa?
Please let us leave this place.
Let us return to Firenze.
There's nothing here for us.
[music fades]
Perhaps as a last resort.
But do not fear,
there is one more move to make.
We shall not give up this villa yet.
[Neifile] Mmm.
I was eating only rhubarb for days.
Yeah, I remember.
It's quite messy in here, isn't it?
[Stratilia scoffing]
Ah. The kitchen.
A wonderful place to think.
Oh, hello, Stratilia.
Have you come here to think too?
Hello!
Hello.
I've been thinking
of my once-living physician, Dioneo,
and the cruel vicissitudes of life.
And anyway, Stratilia,
my room is quite filthy,
and I wondered, Stratilia,
if you might want to clean it immediately.
Right away, if you get my meaning.
I need you now.
For you to call me
a wretched little pig again.
In private.
[crying] I'm really very sad.
[Tindaro wincing]
[intriguing music playing]
[Tindaro grunting]
[Tindaro's breath shuddering]
- No. Never again.
- Why?
Because nobles should be with nobles,
not servants.
Why?
I am employed by the man of the house,
and the man of the house is dead.
Do you understand?
I should have never
entertained this or you.
I should know better.
- Well, in that case, you are dismissed.
- [Stratilia] I'm cleaning.
Then I will dismiss myself.
[sniffling, panting] I'm leaving.
And you will never hear me
start another thought again,
or finish one.
And that is a great loss indeed.
[Tindaro crying]
Don't look at me!
[music fades]
Do you need something?
'Cause whatever it is, I don't have it.
I don't need anything.
- I take care of myself.
- [footsteps approaching]
Can we have the room? [clearing throat]
Can you have the room?
- She can stay.
- No, she cannot.
No, she cannot.
[water burbling]
- [Panfilo] How are you?
- [Neifile] I am fine.
Well, I have a plan for Ruggiero.
The last plan, to bring those men here,
didn't have a happy ending.
[Panfilo] You don't seem sad.
Look, let's not discuss the past,
shall we?
- I need your help now.
- With what? What's your little scheme?
The pestilence can't last forever,
no matter what Ruggiero thinks.
When it ends, this villa could be ours.
But it's Ruggiero's.
[Panfilo] He doesn't care.
He thinks the world is ending.
I wanna convince him to give it to us.
- He doesn't like you.
- He likes you, though.
Doesn't he?
[intriguing music playing]
[Licisca] We need to find the road.
[Filomena] We do not want the road.
It is full of dreadful things.
We will retrace my steps
through the countryside.
This journey is etched into my soul.
I forget you were one to follow
the etchings of your soul.
[music fades]
Fine. You lead the way for once.
[birds chirping]
You don't know what it was like.
[Licisca] Do you know
what I remembered last night?
The morals you abandoned?
Wicked Vitrucchia.
- I never believed in her.
- Yes, you did.
No, I didn't.
"Vitrucchia, Vitrucchia,
the devil cursed your name."
And then we'd blow out
the candles and wait.
Mmm, she never did snatch our teeth
and grind them into a powder for her soup.
It didn't matter.
She always gave us such a fright.
You scared the eye teeth out of me
last night talking about trolls.
Yeah, I know.
I sort of scared myself a bit as well.
I nearly woke you up for company.
But I didn't.
You made the right choice
because I am not here to keep you company.
We are not friends, stupid.
I know that.
Ah! Look, a lemon tree.
- [whimsical music playing]
- I am a genius.
[Licisca] It's rotten.
[Licisca] Uh
Hmm?
Oh God.
[flies buzzing]
[Sirisco sighing]
[birds chirping]
[dirt crunching]
[shovel scraping]
[shovel clattering]
[Sirisco grunting]
Oh, hi there.
By the by, my physician must receive
a proper burial,
apart from the scoundrels and whores.
Really?
Dioneo was the friend of a great nobleman.
And a poisoner of one.
Poisoner, friend,
it's all the same thing.
[Sirisco] Is it?
[Sirisco grunting]
[Tindaro] Give me the shovel.
- [shovel scraping]
- [Sirisco grunting]
[Sirisco groaning]
[Tindaro grunting]
I really am a wretched little pig.
[grunts]
So am I.
[Tindaro grunting]
[Tindaro wincing]
[Tindaro groaning, crying]
[door rattling]
[door opening]
- [footsteps approaching]
- It's you.
I was just doing my exercises.
Shut up
[intriguing music playing]
wretched little pig.
[both moaning]
- Fantastic.
- You're pathetic, weak, a fool.
Your lips [groaning]
are fantastic.
[Tindaro gasping, panting]
Slap me.
[Tindaro grunting]
Harder.
[both grunting]
[both grunting]
- Filthy pig.
- [Tindaro snarling]
[Tindaro moaning]
You're beautiful.
I hate you.
Greedy little noble idiot.
[music fades]
[birds chirping]
[Ruggiero sighing]
[Ruggiero inhaling, exhaling forcefully]
- [footsteps approaching]
- [door opening]
Your men died.
Did they?
Um
Well, a few of those whores
did look a bit clammy, I suppose.
Calandrino, right?
Would you mind untying me
and getting me some wine?
[door creaking]
[lively music playing]
[Pampinea squealing]
The world did smell of one gate of hell.
The world did smell of one gate of hell.
[Panfilo grunting]
[Panfilo exclaiming]
Feast in the famine,
famine in the drought.
[sighing loudly]
Oh, this is
Benevento.
Breasts?
Peaches wrapped in silk.
Well, then.
of Benev [exclaiming]
Barbatus of Benevento.
Jewels, please.
Barbatus.
Benevento.
[Misia exhaling]
[Misia scoffing]
[Panfilo] Benevento.
Hello.
Hello.
[whispering] Barbatus
- Hey! Hey!
- Calandrino, let me in.
No, no. Don't let her in.
- I am head of house, Calandrino.
- No, she's not the head of the house.
- He's not either.
- She's less so than I.
In what way? I beg you to explain.
In character, in spirits,
in honesty, in not lying.
You're very good.
Calandrino, I must insist.
- Do you hear yourself? "I must insist"?
- Do you hear yourself?
[Panfilo] You blood-sucking vulture.
Have you seen your hat,
you angry squirrel?
- [Pampinea] Oh, you
- [Panfilo] You stupid woman.
Grab the Grab the dress, Neifile.
- [Pampinea] Do not
- [Panfilo] Good luck.
- Good luck.
- That is Venetian silk, you monster!
Leave this part of the villa immediately.
- [Panfilo] No.
- Yes!
[Panfilo seething]
[Pampinea yelling]
[Panfilo yelling]
[Panfilo] She's not the head of the house!
[Pampinea chuckling]
How can I help you?
[Pampinea] Hmm. [clearing throat]
I'm not in the mood for a tête-à-tête.
Oh. [chuckling]
Yes. Well, what, then, about
a proposal?
A proposal?
Marriage to me
in exchange for your release.
You may reclaim the villa
as rightful owner, with me as your bride.
And I come
with a hefty dowry.
[Ruggiero chuckling]
[clearing throat]
Apart from our vows, we need never speak.
In truth, I would rather not.
Let us split the villa down the center.
You on one side, me on the other.
- Whose baby is that?
- We can say it's yours.
And you would have us not speak?
I would insist.
Why, then, the rouge?
Might I remind you
that your fate is in my hands?
[Ruggiero] My fate is the same as yours,
which is the same as Stecchi's
and Bruno's, Lorenzo's,
all my friends, all my enemies.
- Those whores too, I imagine.
- They got what they deserved.
[Ruggiero chuckling]
I'm not interested in you at all.
[Pampinea scoffing]
You're a flirt.
[both chuckling]
I'm not flirting.
I'm as honest as a priest.
You are vapid. You're old.
You're pregnant
with some poor man's bastard.
Sirisco's?
[Ruggiero laughing]
But most of all, your personality is bad.
Leonardo never would have married you.
Of course he would have.
[Ruggiero] What idiot gall of you
to claim his hand.
Though I do see why all you crave is love.
But you've never gotten it,
and you'll never get it.
Not because you're not pretty.
Well, not just because you're not pretty.
But because you're a pathetic,
self-centered prude.
Look at how everyone
in the villa despises you.
And I'm sure much was the same in Firenze.
Every man that met you saw instantly
what a slim-hipped,
clenching little shrew you are and ran.
So in answer to your proposal,
I would rather fuck a thornbush
than fuck your dry, desperate body.
I'd rather rot in this room
until the plague takes us all
than get one inch closer to you.
My answer is no.
- You're making
- You've got your answer. Now leave.
I'm too sick of your drooping face
to argue the point further.
What happened?
What did you say to him?
[Ruggiero] Panfilo. Neifile.
How can I help you?
What did Pampinea say to you?
Pampinea proposed marriage
in exchange for my freedom.
Uh
And what was your answer?
Well, I told her I'd consider it,
of course.
Unless you have a better offer?
[Panfilo] We do, in fact.
Set us up as your stewards.
You two? You and your wife?
[Panfilo] Yes. So the villa is yours.
But of course, you'd never
want to spend what little time is left
in this hole without your friends.
We'll manage the estate in your absence.
Should you ever return,
we'll have the house ale waiting for you.
[Ruggiero] Hmm.
You know I had sex with her, right?
Does that not bother you?
Happened right here.
You could probably still smell it.
[Ruggiero chuckling]
Does it not bother him that we made love?
Does it not bother you?
It bothers me.
But that's not why I am here.
- I have been a good wife to you.
- Have I not been a good husband to you?
- There are things we do not discuss.
- Oh, discuss them, please.
[Neifile] You told me
God had sent me Dioneo.
You lied to me about God.
You've slept with this murderer.
[Neifile] And you've been faithful?
What about the bootmaker?
What about you and Lord Petti?
Those were brotherly activities.
- You think I'm a child.
- [Panfilo] Why do you think that is?
You stole the cardinal's toe, Neifile.
You fell into a well.
Do you not love me as I am?
Of course I love you.
[dramatic music playing]
You're my partner.
And my friend.
And my wife.
There are some faults in me.
Or, not faults, but differences.
I make up for them, do I not?
I did not anticipate discussing this
in front of another.
You were never going to discuss it.
You were just going to lie.
When I saw you with Ruggiero
What? You saw us? What part?
Quiet!
[Panfilo exhaling]
[Panfilo] When I saw you
it made me happy to see you happy.
I'm sorry I couldn't
give that to you myself.
[music fades]
Okay, I will do it.
You two can run the estate.
In fact, you can have it.
I'll sign whatever you want.
- What?
- [Ruggiero] Yeah.
Get a notary or whatever's needed.
You know,
that's true love you have there,
of a sort.
You and the elegant man.
Enjoy it while it lives.
Right.
You wanna untie me and have sex again?
Or you don't untie me and
No.
Thank you.
[Ruggiero] Are you all right, Neifile?
You look a little pale.
I'm fine.
That's a shame.
[door closing]
[Panfilo sobbing]
What a freedom that was,
saying things we've left unsaid.
[Panfilo chuckling]
Yes.
I feel
light.
- He agreed!
- [Panfilo] What?
He did?
[Neifile giggling]
[both chuckling]
[Panfilo] I promise you, my love,
in this next chapter
of our lives together
I'll leave nothing unsaid.
You are my best friend.
- And you mine.
- And you deserve my honesty.
You mine.
[Neifile crying]
[foreboding music playing]
[Sirisco grunting, groaning]
[Sirisco sighing]
Let us begin.
[music fades]
He died, and I lived.
Feels wrong to me,
but I've learned not to trust my feelings.
[birds chirping]
Sirisco, please carve a large statue
of Dioneo and place it here.
Let the base be inscribed
"Dioneo of Genoa."
"He pleasured thousands
of women physically."
I think he'd like that.
And then add,
"Yet he never found love."
Is that too cruel?
Just end on
"thousands of women physically."
A man with an imperfect soul
in a fallible body.
[somber, dramatic music playing]
[Pampinea sobbing]
[inhaling, sobbing loudly]
[music fades]
[Pampinea] I am nothing.
You're not nothing.
You are so much.
[Pampinea] I have nothing. [sobbing]
I have no one.
You have me.
[softly] You.
You've been my friend all along.
[Pampinea sniffling]
Do you love me?
Of course I love you.
I love you, Misia.
Uh
I love you too, viscontessa.
I love you too.
Of course I love you.
You lost your lover,
and we didn't mourn her.
- No.
- We didn't mourn your Parmena.
I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry.
- Oh, that's okay.
- No.
Oh, that's okay, viscontessa.
- That's okay.
- No. I'm so sorry.
We could do it now. We could do it now.
What?
[lively music playing]
Just through here.
This branch looks familiar.
You keep saying that.
Why didn't we find the road when we could?
You really think I can't do anything.
Is that correct?
Yes.
See?
[goat bleating]
You found this on the way to the villa?
No, but I still get credit
for finding it now.
[Licisca] Uh,
hello?
- Hi.
- Hello there.
Hello, dear travelers. How do you fare?
Ugh. We are starving. My stomach
has almost finished eating itself.
Why don't you come in?
We were just about to sup. Join us.
- That would be so kind.
- [woman] Not at all.
It's nice to have some company.
Mario, we've guests!
What a lovely little shack you have.
It's amazing how it stands up
all on its own.
- [Licisca exclaiming]
- So generous of you.
It's a modest broth, but it will warm you.
- It'll be perfect.
- I am going to enjoy every last drop.
Come in and sit down.
- The others are waiting.
- Oh.
- Smells so good.
- [both chuckling]
Mario, don't be rude. Say hello.
[Filomena] Oh my God.
- What's going on?
- [Filomena] No.
Wha
- Oh my God.
- No. No!
- Wait a second. Oh my God.
- Oh my God.
- They're dead!
- Back up.
- Back up. Back up!
- Oh my God.
- They're all dead!
- Back up!
- [woman] Mario!
- What in the absolute depths of hell?
The soup is good! The soup is good!
Nice meeting you!
[both panting]
I want to close my eyes and not see
anything ever again, but be alive.
That was horrendous.
But at least we got to eat.
"At least we got to eat?"
Filomena, through your blessed plan
of staying off the road,
we are out here
with the insane and the dead.
The road, by its nature, is failproof.
It is a line which leads you
to the very place that you want to go.
This is your fault.
You have failed.
How dare you?
If you just hadn't have pushed me
off that bridge
- If you had just let me share my bread!
- Oh, here we go
But no, apparently,
you are eternally in charge.
King of bread, king of me!
I'm going back to Villa Santa.
Back to the axman
and all those supposed friends
who told us to leave or die? Smart.
I have a real friend there, Misia.
My one friend that I finally made.
My very first friend.
Your first friend? Oh, that is rich.
How is that rich?
I have never had a real friend before.
- O Lord in Heaven.
- [Filomena] What?
Me! You had me!
We were friends until our twelfth year,
when for some unknown reason,
you cut off my hair
in the third feast of Michaelmas.
- I didn't do that.
- [Licisca] Yes, you did.
You cut it off,
then showed it to Loretta and Violetta,
and never spoke to me again as a friend.
- Well, it had to happen at some point.
- Why?
Because I discovered
that you were my servant.
[birds chirping]
Your father wasn't like this.
He was kind.
[emotional music playing]
[Filomena] You were always more like him
than I was.
Do you think so?
Yeah.
So
you could never be friends with me,
but you can be friends with Misia.
What's the difference?
I don't know.
But I do know
that the sun is about to set,
and I don't wanna be out here
in the dark again.
[Licisca] You're not alone this time.
You're with me.
And Vitrucchia.
- That was her back there.
- [Filomena] Don't say that.
[music fades]
[birds chirping]
We break through sour roots ♪
That map the mound ♪
Till we're merely tiny clippings ♪
Of the earth ♪
Wind dispels our bodies ♪
Sparse above the round ♪
And gingerly returns them ♪
To the dirt ♪
Thank you for letting me honor her.
Thank you for letting me be a part of it.
Friend?
Friend.
[Pampinea] Friends cheer each other.
What would cheer you?
I would like to leave this place
and never return.
Perhaps that would be best.
Leave Ruggiero
to run roughshod. [chuckling]
[slurping]
My dearest friend,
my true friend
with me at every point.
[softly] Yes.
Oh, what's wrong?
Would you help me with something?
[birds chirping]
Okay, I'm gonna go
tend to the pigs. I'm off.
Don't follow me.
- Can I help you?
- No.
Why not? I'm stronger than I look.
As if you don't already know that.
[Stratilia] No.
We have met.
I have my life, and you have yours.
Respect the distance.
[dramatic music playing]
[indistinct rustling]
[suspenseful music swelling]
[music fades]
[Calandrino snoring]
[door opening]
[Calandrino snoring]
How's your sad mistress?
[Ruggiero chuckling]
Um, she
wants me to kill you
so that nothing stands
between her and the villa.
[Ruggiero] Well, that's unfortunate.
[Misia scoffing]
I don't want to.
No good will come from us
in this place anyway.
While killing you
[crickets chirping]
[Ruggiero] What?
I won't survive it.
[Ruggiero scoffing]
Then don't do it.
She's my mistress.
[Ruggiero chuckling]
What would you have me do?
Give my blessing?
Wou Would you?
[Ruggiero chuckling softly]
Oh. Here you are
asking for permission to kill me,
and I'm not even the heir to the villa.
Bravo.
[Misia's breath shuddering]
- Hear what I said? I'm not the heir.
- Just drink.
- Take a little drink.
- I'm not the heir. I'm not
- [Misia screaming]
- [Ruggiero screaming]
[Ruggiero groaning]
[Misia whimpering]
[Ruggiero coughing]
Well-planned.
[Ruggiero breathing heavily, coughing]
I thought poison.
I thought that you might
I'm not the heir.
What? What?
Get off me.
I'm not the heir.
[Tindaro grunting]
["She's Lost Control"
by Joy Division playing]
And she turned around
And took me by the hand ♪
And said I've lost control again ♪
And seized up on the floor
I thought she'd die ♪
She said I've lost control ♪
She's lost control again ♪
She's lost control ♪
She's lost control again ♪
She's lost control ♪
[song fades]
[opening theme music playing]
[music fades]
[crickets chirping]
We can't just stay out here.
We have to panic!
- Sirisco! Get us back inside that villa.
- God!
That crazy axman will chop our heads off.
What would you have me do?
Grow my hands into swords?
- Stop!
- I don't know!
If you do not get us back inside,
I'll scream.
Well, don't look to me for solutions
because it's obvious I have none!
- Stop.
- The chapel.
The keys are inside.
- Fool.
- Okay, please do not be mean to me.
- Then don't be stupid.
- Let's go to the stables.
The stinky stables?
I I I I have a horse intolerance.
And and a wood intolerance.
And I won't tolerate stink!
I have to go back for my wife.
[determined music playing]
I'm gonna save my wife.
Wait
He left his wife in there?
[scoffing] What kind of a man does that?
Panfilo! Man, you can't
You you can't do that, you'll fall.
Fall, Panfilo. Fall!
[men shouting in distance]
[both panting]
[wondrous music playing]
[both grunting]
[both chuckling]
[tunic clattering on floor]
[Neifile giggling]
[Neifile panting]
Are you frightened?
Not really.
- [Neifile giggling]
- [Ruggiero chuckling]
[Ruggiero grunting]
[Ruggiero exhaling]
As soon as I laid my eyes on you, I knew.
That you could have me?
That you wanted to be had.
[both laughing]
[both breathing heavily]
[Neifile giggling, moaning]
Keep climbing, Panfilo.
When your brains are splashed
all over the cobblestones,
you won't have a drop of my sympathy.
Quiet! You'll draw their attention!
Don't tell me to be quiet!
Fine, give us one loud scream.
Let's see what
- [Pampinea screaming]
- [Misia exclaiming]
[Lorenzo] Hey!
We are trying to entertain in here.
[suspenseful music playing]
- [Lorenzo roaring]
- [all screaming]
[Lorenzo chortling]
[door creaking, closing]
[Ruggiero, Neifile moaning]
[Ruggiero chuckling]
[dramatic music playing]
[Neifile moaning softly]
[Neifile breathing heavily]
[Neifile moaning]
[chickens clucking]
[horse whinnying softly]
[music fades]
[door creaking open]
Stop! Intruder! Rapist!
Panfilo.
So, then, you didn't fall to your death
as we'd hoped?
Did you see the brute? Did he slice you?
- I saw him reenter the villa.
- Did you find your wife?
She's able to look after herself.
[Pampinea chuckling]
[Pampinea claps] What a husband.
Oh, speaking of husbands, what a pleasure
it was to meet yours this evening.
I suppose it was your first time
meeting him too.
How did you find him? Quite dead?
- [Tindaro] Did you see the doctor?
- No.
[Tindaro] And what of the Lady Filomena,
my betrothed?
I have something to reveal
that will absolutely devastate her.
- [Stratilia] Ugh.
- She was no lady, Padrone.
- What?
- Filomena was never Filomena.
Well, who was Filomena, then?
- Licisca.
- [Panfilo] The servant.
Where have you been?
Licisca was the servant,
Filomena was the lady.
They switched places
and were both cast out.
[crickets chirping]
Are are you saying
that I am the victim of a switcheroo?
We are all victims. Myself, most of all!
Why were we cast out?
Well
Panfilo thought
it'd be a great and joyful thing
to invite a murderous
band of satanists to our home.
It all started when Pampinea
pretended to be married to
and magically impregnated
by our long-dead host!
The point is,
we are here now because of Panfilo!
The Lady Stratilia
asked why we were all cast out.
Well, we are all here
because Sirisco
desecrated Leonardo's corpse.
So Leonardo wasn't in Venezia?
Are you even pregnant?
Yes! Of course I am pregnant, you monster!
Then who's the father?
[Tindaro muttering]
Must we rehash every moment of history?
What's done is done.
[Sirisco shouting, wailing]
[Sirisco] This whole mess is my fault!
I brought them here!
Good point. It is all your fault.
I thought I finally had a move.
But I'm just an idiot. I'm just an idiot.
- You're not an idiot, you're just stupid.
- Stupid is right.
[Sirisco chuckling]
I agree.
[Sirisco crying] Stupid is right.
[somber music playing]
God, look at us
out here in the cold
no pillow.
My legs will be your pillows.
Your legs are not pillows.
Your legs are legs.
I'm sorry that my legs aren't pillows.
Would that they could be pillows.
We'll try it.
[voice breaking]
I haven't even had my evening snack.
Oh, shut up.
[Tindaro crying]
[crying]
[Pampinea] You should be crying
most of all.
Your wife is trapped
in that house full of murderers
and you couldn't save her.
- Dark, it's dark. It's so dar
- [branch snapping]
- [Filomena screaming]
- Oh my God. Go! Keep going.
Cannot believe I'm out here again.
You have no idea what it's like.
[crying] Freezing cold, dying beggars,
people that love to strangle
beautiful women.
- We are in hell, Licisca. This is hell!
- You are hell.
- Oh.
- Where did that tunnel spit us out?
I should be sat in front of a fire
with my toes so hot they're smoking.
You should have whatever you desire
the moment it occurs to you.
Your reflections on what should be
are always so helpful.
- Where are we even going?
- Where do you think we are going?
We're walking back to Firenze.
Now?
No, I thought we'd just hang around
to see what kind of creatures
kick up around here at this time of night.
[bushes rustling]
[Filomena screaming, crying]
- Oh my Stop it. Shush.
- No, I can't keep walking in the dark!
- Don't make me do it!
- Okay, fine. Fine.
We'll find a place to stay
until it's light.
- Out here?
- [Licisca] We obviously can't go back.
You could. Alone.
[Filomena sniffling]
- How are you so calm?
- [Licisca] I'm not calm.
I'm terrified.
But as usual, your emotions come first.
Currently, you're taking up all the fear.
There's none left for me.
[crickets chirping]
[Filomena] Great.
Darkest place in the woods.
You don't wanna walk,
you don't wanna stop.
I hate this.
I hate this, and I hate you.
Ah. A tantrum. Fantastic.
If your father was here,
he'd roll his eyes out of his head.
It was you and your little game
of dress-up that got us kicked out.
- I saved your life back at the villa.
- Misia saved my life.
If she hadn't spoken,
you would have stayed silent.
I would have spoken sooner.
I I was just timing it out.
This is my side of the cave.
Don't come over here.
Fine.
Why would I when I have
this far superior side of the cave?
Oh look.
A lovely, comfortable, smooth spot.
How lovely.
Thank you for smoothing it, cave troll.
This cave is safe and troll-free.
I hope you're right.
[Licisca sighing]
And I know you think I'm nothing,
just like my father did,
but I'm not nothing.
I never said that,
and nor did he.
[bushes rustling]
Oh, troll's back.
I will kill you.
[animal screeching]
[animal screeching]
[birds chirping]
[wondrous music playing]
[flies buzzing]
- [Neifile screaming]
- [cup clattering]
[sinister music playing]
[Pampinea] Woman, this is the pestilence?
I've never seen it work so fast,
but it must be.
Perhaps the disease is growing stronger.
It's important that we all stay calm.
- Fetch the onions!
- [Panfilo] No, no!
- Dioneo, where are you?
- [lively music playing]
- Oh my God!
- You're too close!
Where's the bird? We need a bird!
Give me an onion! Onion!
Bring the onions.
- Give me your hand, Neifile.
- Jesus!
- [Sirisco grunting, straining]
- [music fades]
- [Misia] Oh here.
- [Sirisco] God.
- [Misia] Let me give you a hand.
- [Sirisco] No, I have it. No.
I can do all this. I have it.
[Misia] Fine. Suit yourself.
Let's go to the gardens, Neifile.
I don't want you in this infested house.
- I've been here all night.
- Yes, I know.
- [door opening]
- You're back! Where have you been?
Just load them on here.
Neifile, offer up a prayer of thanks
to God our deliverer,
who smote down our enemies
and protected us all
in our time of great need.
No
I won't.
You can't tell my wife what to do.
You're not the heir to the villa.
Neither are you.
There is no heir!
Yes, there is.
What?
- On my command.
- This won't work.
- Quiet!
- [shushing]
- [Pampinea] Shush.
- [whispering] My God.
Three,
two,
one.
- What the fuck?
- [both straining]
[Misia] Oh my God.
[scattered grunting]
Hey! None of that!
Oh no! Oh God!
[Panfilo grunting]
[Panfilo] Hit him harder!
- [Sirisco grunting]
- [Ruggiero grunting]
Retreat! Retreat!
- Have you seen the doctor?
- I'm disappointed in you, old friend.
[Tindaro yelling]
[whimsical music playing]
- [Ruggiero grunting]
- [all screaming]
Yes.
Is he all right?
He'll be fine. Let's tie him, quickly.
- Misia, help.
- No, I'm busy.
Oh God, please.
- Doing what?
- Protecting you.
[Sirisco grunting]
We should've begun with violence.
He's still the heir to the villa.
Yes
he is.
And he deserves respect.
The utmost respect.
Misia, get his shirt.
[Misia] Shirt, shirt, shirt
[Sirisco] I need you to move. Move.
Signore Tindaro.
[pensive music playing]
[Sirisco sighing]
[somber, dramatic music playing]
[Pampinea] I can feel him scraping
in there.
Let us calm him
with a few more hither-and-yons.
Grief takes its toll.
- [music fades]
- [birds chirping]
You're so gracious to grieve him.
[Pampinea exclaiming]
Who would I be
if I did not grieve my own husband?
My little love story
is at an end, it seems.
I shall miss it.
I meant Dioneo.
Oh.
Yes, I grieve him too, of course.
Though he was a scoundrel.
They do your son good,
these lovely walks.
I'm sure he can feel
your dedication quite
forcefully.
[Pampinea] And not my distress, I pray.
I detest that nasty man, Panfilo.
Trying to blame anyone but himself
for the mess we're in.
He attacked me repeatedly.
It really was pathetic, no?
He's pathetic, I agree.
As if it was not his own fault
that the murderer invaded my home.
[Misia gasping]
Have I won no allies?
Am I not a grieving widow?
[voice breaking] No one understands.
[tense music playing]
I guess you understand,
to a point.
Was she nice?
Oh yes, she was she was nice.
And she was just so gentle, and she lo
Viscontessa?
Please let us leave this place.
Let us return to Firenze.
There's nothing here for us.
[music fades]
Perhaps as a last resort.
But do not fear,
there is one more move to make.
We shall not give up this villa yet.
[Neifile] Mmm.
I was eating only rhubarb for days.
Yeah, I remember.
It's quite messy in here, isn't it?
[Stratilia scoffing]
Ah. The kitchen.
A wonderful place to think.
Oh, hello, Stratilia.
Have you come here to think too?
Hello!
Hello.
I've been thinking
of my once-living physician, Dioneo,
and the cruel vicissitudes of life.
And anyway, Stratilia,
my room is quite filthy,
and I wondered, Stratilia,
if you might want to clean it immediately.
Right away, if you get my meaning.
I need you now.
For you to call me
a wretched little pig again.
In private.
[crying] I'm really very sad.
[Tindaro wincing]
[intriguing music playing]
[Tindaro grunting]
[Tindaro's breath shuddering]
- No. Never again.
- Why?
Because nobles should be with nobles,
not servants.
Why?
I am employed by the man of the house,
and the man of the house is dead.
Do you understand?
I should have never
entertained this or you.
I should know better.
- Well, in that case, you are dismissed.
- [Stratilia] I'm cleaning.
Then I will dismiss myself.
[sniffling, panting] I'm leaving.
And you will never hear me
start another thought again,
or finish one.
And that is a great loss indeed.
[Tindaro crying]
Don't look at me!
[music fades]
Do you need something?
'Cause whatever it is, I don't have it.
I don't need anything.
- I take care of myself.
- [footsteps approaching]
Can we have the room? [clearing throat]
Can you have the room?
- She can stay.
- No, she cannot.
No, she cannot.
[water burbling]
- [Panfilo] How are you?
- [Neifile] I am fine.
Well, I have a plan for Ruggiero.
The last plan, to bring those men here,
didn't have a happy ending.
[Panfilo] You don't seem sad.
Look, let's not discuss the past,
shall we?
- I need your help now.
- With what? What's your little scheme?
The pestilence can't last forever,
no matter what Ruggiero thinks.
When it ends, this villa could be ours.
But it's Ruggiero's.
[Panfilo] He doesn't care.
He thinks the world is ending.
I wanna convince him to give it to us.
- He doesn't like you.
- He likes you, though.
Doesn't he?
[intriguing music playing]
[Licisca] We need to find the road.
[Filomena] We do not want the road.
It is full of dreadful things.
We will retrace my steps
through the countryside.
This journey is etched into my soul.
I forget you were one to follow
the etchings of your soul.
[music fades]
Fine. You lead the way for once.
[birds chirping]
You don't know what it was like.
[Licisca] Do you know
what I remembered last night?
The morals you abandoned?
Wicked Vitrucchia.
- I never believed in her.
- Yes, you did.
No, I didn't.
"Vitrucchia, Vitrucchia,
the devil cursed your name."
And then we'd blow out
the candles and wait.
Mmm, she never did snatch our teeth
and grind them into a powder for her soup.
It didn't matter.
She always gave us such a fright.
You scared the eye teeth out of me
last night talking about trolls.
Yeah, I know.
I sort of scared myself a bit as well.
I nearly woke you up for company.
But I didn't.
You made the right choice
because I am not here to keep you company.
We are not friends, stupid.
I know that.
Ah! Look, a lemon tree.
- [whimsical music playing]
- I am a genius.
[Licisca] It's rotten.
[Licisca] Uh
Hmm?
Oh God.
[flies buzzing]
[Sirisco sighing]
[birds chirping]
[dirt crunching]
[shovel scraping]
[shovel clattering]
[Sirisco grunting]
Oh, hi there.
By the by, my physician must receive
a proper burial,
apart from the scoundrels and whores.
Really?
Dioneo was the friend of a great nobleman.
And a poisoner of one.
Poisoner, friend,
it's all the same thing.
[Sirisco] Is it?
[Sirisco grunting]
[Tindaro] Give me the shovel.
- [shovel scraping]
- [Sirisco grunting]
[Sirisco groaning]
[Tindaro grunting]
I really am a wretched little pig.
[grunts]
So am I.
[Tindaro grunting]
[Tindaro wincing]
[Tindaro groaning, crying]
[door rattling]
[door opening]
- [footsteps approaching]
- It's you.
I was just doing my exercises.
Shut up
[intriguing music playing]
wretched little pig.
[both moaning]
- Fantastic.
- You're pathetic, weak, a fool.
Your lips [groaning]
are fantastic.
[Tindaro gasping, panting]
Slap me.
[Tindaro grunting]
Harder.
[both grunting]
[both grunting]
- Filthy pig.
- [Tindaro snarling]
[Tindaro moaning]
You're beautiful.
I hate you.
Greedy little noble idiot.
[music fades]
[birds chirping]
[Ruggiero sighing]
[Ruggiero inhaling, exhaling forcefully]
- [footsteps approaching]
- [door opening]
Your men died.
Did they?
Um
Well, a few of those whores
did look a bit clammy, I suppose.
Calandrino, right?
Would you mind untying me
and getting me some wine?
[door creaking]
[lively music playing]
[Pampinea squealing]
The world did smell of one gate of hell.
The world did smell of one gate of hell.
[Panfilo grunting]
[Panfilo exclaiming]
Feast in the famine,
famine in the drought.
[sighing loudly]
Oh, this is
Benevento.
Breasts?
Peaches wrapped in silk.
Well, then.
of Benev [exclaiming]
Barbatus of Benevento.
Jewels, please.
Barbatus.
Benevento.
[Misia exhaling]
[Misia scoffing]
[Panfilo] Benevento.
Hello.
Hello.
[whispering] Barbatus
- Hey! Hey!
- Calandrino, let me in.
No, no. Don't let her in.
- I am head of house, Calandrino.
- No, she's not the head of the house.
- He's not either.
- She's less so than I.
In what way? I beg you to explain.
In character, in spirits,
in honesty, in not lying.
You're very good.
Calandrino, I must insist.
- Do you hear yourself? "I must insist"?
- Do you hear yourself?
[Panfilo] You blood-sucking vulture.
Have you seen your hat,
you angry squirrel?
- [Pampinea] Oh, you
- [Panfilo] You stupid woman.
Grab the Grab the dress, Neifile.
- [Pampinea] Do not
- [Panfilo] Good luck.
- Good luck.
- That is Venetian silk, you monster!
Leave this part of the villa immediately.
- [Panfilo] No.
- Yes!
[Panfilo seething]
[Pampinea yelling]
[Panfilo yelling]
[Panfilo] She's not the head of the house!
[Pampinea chuckling]
How can I help you?
[Pampinea] Hmm. [clearing throat]
I'm not in the mood for a tête-à-tête.
Oh. [chuckling]
Yes. Well, what, then, about
a proposal?
A proposal?
Marriage to me
in exchange for your release.
You may reclaim the villa
as rightful owner, with me as your bride.
And I come
with a hefty dowry.
[Ruggiero chuckling]
[clearing throat]
Apart from our vows, we need never speak.
In truth, I would rather not.
Let us split the villa down the center.
You on one side, me on the other.
- Whose baby is that?
- We can say it's yours.
And you would have us not speak?
I would insist.
Why, then, the rouge?
Might I remind you
that your fate is in my hands?
[Ruggiero] My fate is the same as yours,
which is the same as Stecchi's
and Bruno's, Lorenzo's,
all my friends, all my enemies.
- Those whores too, I imagine.
- They got what they deserved.
[Ruggiero chuckling]
I'm not interested in you at all.
[Pampinea scoffing]
You're a flirt.
[both chuckling]
I'm not flirting.
I'm as honest as a priest.
You are vapid. You're old.
You're pregnant
with some poor man's bastard.
Sirisco's?
[Ruggiero laughing]
But most of all, your personality is bad.
Leonardo never would have married you.
Of course he would have.
[Ruggiero] What idiot gall of you
to claim his hand.
Though I do see why all you crave is love.
But you've never gotten it,
and you'll never get it.
Not because you're not pretty.
Well, not just because you're not pretty.
But because you're a pathetic,
self-centered prude.
Look at how everyone
in the villa despises you.
And I'm sure much was the same in Firenze.
Every man that met you saw instantly
what a slim-hipped,
clenching little shrew you are and ran.
So in answer to your proposal,
I would rather fuck a thornbush
than fuck your dry, desperate body.
I'd rather rot in this room
until the plague takes us all
than get one inch closer to you.
My answer is no.
- You're making
- You've got your answer. Now leave.
I'm too sick of your drooping face
to argue the point further.
What happened?
What did you say to him?
[Ruggiero] Panfilo. Neifile.
How can I help you?
What did Pampinea say to you?
Pampinea proposed marriage
in exchange for my freedom.
Uh
And what was your answer?
Well, I told her I'd consider it,
of course.
Unless you have a better offer?
[Panfilo] We do, in fact.
Set us up as your stewards.
You two? You and your wife?
[Panfilo] Yes. So the villa is yours.
But of course, you'd never
want to spend what little time is left
in this hole without your friends.
We'll manage the estate in your absence.
Should you ever return,
we'll have the house ale waiting for you.
[Ruggiero] Hmm.
You know I had sex with her, right?
Does that not bother you?
Happened right here.
You could probably still smell it.
[Ruggiero chuckling]
Does it not bother him that we made love?
Does it not bother you?
It bothers me.
But that's not why I am here.
- I have been a good wife to you.
- Have I not been a good husband to you?
- There are things we do not discuss.
- Oh, discuss them, please.
[Neifile] You told me
God had sent me Dioneo.
You lied to me about God.
You've slept with this murderer.
[Neifile] And you've been faithful?
What about the bootmaker?
What about you and Lord Petti?
Those were brotherly activities.
- You think I'm a child.
- [Panfilo] Why do you think that is?
You stole the cardinal's toe, Neifile.
You fell into a well.
Do you not love me as I am?
Of course I love you.
[dramatic music playing]
You're my partner.
And my friend.
And my wife.
There are some faults in me.
Or, not faults, but differences.
I make up for them, do I not?
I did not anticipate discussing this
in front of another.
You were never going to discuss it.
You were just going to lie.
When I saw you with Ruggiero
What? You saw us? What part?
Quiet!
[Panfilo exhaling]
[Panfilo] When I saw you
it made me happy to see you happy.
I'm sorry I couldn't
give that to you myself.
[music fades]
Okay, I will do it.
You two can run the estate.
In fact, you can have it.
I'll sign whatever you want.
- What?
- [Ruggiero] Yeah.
Get a notary or whatever's needed.
You know,
that's true love you have there,
of a sort.
You and the elegant man.
Enjoy it while it lives.
Right.
You wanna untie me and have sex again?
Or you don't untie me and
No.
Thank you.
[Ruggiero] Are you all right, Neifile?
You look a little pale.
I'm fine.
That's a shame.
[door closing]
[Panfilo sobbing]
What a freedom that was,
saying things we've left unsaid.
[Panfilo chuckling]
Yes.
I feel
light.
- He agreed!
- [Panfilo] What?
He did?
[Neifile giggling]
[both chuckling]
[Panfilo] I promise you, my love,
in this next chapter
of our lives together
I'll leave nothing unsaid.
You are my best friend.
- And you mine.
- And you deserve my honesty.
You mine.
[Neifile crying]
[foreboding music playing]
[Sirisco grunting, groaning]
[Sirisco sighing]
Let us begin.
[music fades]
He died, and I lived.
Feels wrong to me,
but I've learned not to trust my feelings.
[birds chirping]
Sirisco, please carve a large statue
of Dioneo and place it here.
Let the base be inscribed
"Dioneo of Genoa."
"He pleasured thousands
of women physically."
I think he'd like that.
And then add,
"Yet he never found love."
Is that too cruel?
Just end on
"thousands of women physically."
A man with an imperfect soul
in a fallible body.
[somber, dramatic music playing]
[Pampinea sobbing]
[inhaling, sobbing loudly]
[music fades]
[Pampinea] I am nothing.
You're not nothing.
You are so much.
[Pampinea] I have nothing. [sobbing]
I have no one.
You have me.
[softly] You.
You've been my friend all along.
[Pampinea sniffling]
Do you love me?
Of course I love you.
I love you, Misia.
Uh
I love you too, viscontessa.
I love you too.
Of course I love you.
You lost your lover,
and we didn't mourn her.
- No.
- We didn't mourn your Parmena.
I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry.
- Oh, that's okay.
- No.
Oh, that's okay, viscontessa.
- That's okay.
- No. I'm so sorry.
We could do it now. We could do it now.
What?
[lively music playing]
Just through here.
This branch looks familiar.
You keep saying that.
Why didn't we find the road when we could?
You really think I can't do anything.
Is that correct?
Yes.
See?
[goat bleating]
You found this on the way to the villa?
No, but I still get credit
for finding it now.
[Licisca] Uh,
hello?
- Hi.
- Hello there.
Hello, dear travelers. How do you fare?
Ugh. We are starving. My stomach
has almost finished eating itself.
Why don't you come in?
We were just about to sup. Join us.
- That would be so kind.
- [woman] Not at all.
It's nice to have some company.
Mario, we've guests!
What a lovely little shack you have.
It's amazing how it stands up
all on its own.
- [Licisca exclaiming]
- So generous of you.
It's a modest broth, but it will warm you.
- It'll be perfect.
- I am going to enjoy every last drop.
Come in and sit down.
- The others are waiting.
- Oh.
- Smells so good.
- [both chuckling]
Mario, don't be rude. Say hello.
[Filomena] Oh my God.
- What's going on?
- [Filomena] No.
Wha
- Oh my God.
- No. No!
- Wait a second. Oh my God.
- Oh my God.
- They're dead!
- Back up.
- Back up. Back up!
- Oh my God.
- They're all dead!
- Back up!
- [woman] Mario!
- What in the absolute depths of hell?
The soup is good! The soup is good!
Nice meeting you!
[both panting]
I want to close my eyes and not see
anything ever again, but be alive.
That was horrendous.
But at least we got to eat.
"At least we got to eat?"
Filomena, through your blessed plan
of staying off the road,
we are out here
with the insane and the dead.
The road, by its nature, is failproof.
It is a line which leads you
to the very place that you want to go.
This is your fault.
You have failed.
How dare you?
If you just hadn't have pushed me
off that bridge
- If you had just let me share my bread!
- Oh, here we go
But no, apparently,
you are eternally in charge.
King of bread, king of me!
I'm going back to Villa Santa.
Back to the axman
and all those supposed friends
who told us to leave or die? Smart.
I have a real friend there, Misia.
My one friend that I finally made.
My very first friend.
Your first friend? Oh, that is rich.
How is that rich?
I have never had a real friend before.
- O Lord in Heaven.
- [Filomena] What?
Me! You had me!
We were friends until our twelfth year,
when for some unknown reason,
you cut off my hair
in the third feast of Michaelmas.
- I didn't do that.
- [Licisca] Yes, you did.
You cut it off,
then showed it to Loretta and Violetta,
and never spoke to me again as a friend.
- Well, it had to happen at some point.
- Why?
Because I discovered
that you were my servant.
[birds chirping]
Your father wasn't like this.
He was kind.
[emotional music playing]
[Filomena] You were always more like him
than I was.
Do you think so?
Yeah.
So
you could never be friends with me,
but you can be friends with Misia.
What's the difference?
I don't know.
But I do know
that the sun is about to set,
and I don't wanna be out here
in the dark again.
[Licisca] You're not alone this time.
You're with me.
And Vitrucchia.
- That was her back there.
- [Filomena] Don't say that.
[music fades]
[birds chirping]
We break through sour roots ♪
That map the mound ♪
Till we're merely tiny clippings ♪
Of the earth ♪
Wind dispels our bodies ♪
Sparse above the round ♪
And gingerly returns them ♪
To the dirt ♪
Thank you for letting me honor her.
Thank you for letting me be a part of it.
Friend?
Friend.
[Pampinea] Friends cheer each other.
What would cheer you?
I would like to leave this place
and never return.
Perhaps that would be best.
Leave Ruggiero
to run roughshod. [chuckling]
[slurping]
My dearest friend,
my true friend
with me at every point.
[softly] Yes.
Oh, what's wrong?
Would you help me with something?
[birds chirping]
Okay, I'm gonna go
tend to the pigs. I'm off.
Don't follow me.
- Can I help you?
- No.
Why not? I'm stronger than I look.
As if you don't already know that.
[Stratilia] No.
We have met.
I have my life, and you have yours.
Respect the distance.
[dramatic music playing]
[indistinct rustling]
[suspenseful music swelling]
[music fades]
[Calandrino snoring]
[door opening]
[Calandrino snoring]
How's your sad mistress?
[Ruggiero chuckling]
Um, she
wants me to kill you
so that nothing stands
between her and the villa.
[Ruggiero] Well, that's unfortunate.
[Misia scoffing]
I don't want to.
No good will come from us
in this place anyway.
While killing you
[crickets chirping]
[Ruggiero] What?
I won't survive it.
[Ruggiero scoffing]
Then don't do it.
She's my mistress.
[Ruggiero chuckling]
What would you have me do?
Give my blessing?
Wou Would you?
[Ruggiero chuckling softly]
Oh. Here you are
asking for permission to kill me,
and I'm not even the heir to the villa.
Bravo.
[Misia's breath shuddering]
- Hear what I said? I'm not the heir.
- Just drink.
- Take a little drink.
- I'm not the heir. I'm not
- [Misia screaming]
- [Ruggiero screaming]
[Ruggiero groaning]
[Misia whimpering]
[Ruggiero coughing]
Well-planned.
[Ruggiero breathing heavily, coughing]
I thought poison.
I thought that you might
I'm not the heir.
What? What?
Get off me.
I'm not the heir.
[Tindaro grunting]
["She's Lost Control"
by Joy Division playing]
And she turned around
And took me by the hand ♪
And said I've lost control again ♪
And seized up on the floor
I thought she'd die ♪
She said I've lost control ♪
She's lost control again ♪
She's lost control ♪
She's lost control again ♪
She's lost control ♪
[song fades]