The Wedding Coach (2021) s01e05 Episode Script
Festival of Fights
I'm Jamie Lee, comedian,
actress, author, and former bride.
A few years ago, I got married.
Was it magical? Kinda.
Was planning it a bit of a nightmare?
[dramatic music intensifying]
Yes.
In fact,
I found wedding planning so ridiculous
that I wrote a book about it!
Here's the thing.
The wedding industry wants you to believe
that everything should be perfect,
but that's some bullshit.
There's no need for a wedding expert.
You just need someone who's lived
through it to do your dirty work.
I'll be there to help couples
get to the finish line,
and I'll be bringing along
some of my friends to help.
Consider me the wedding coach!
Do I have pit stains?
Ooh, la, la, la, la
Do, do, do, do, do, do it ♪
Ooh, la, la, la, la
Do, do, do, do, do, do it ♪
[upbeat music playing]
[Lee] It's Babe City, USA, population two.
Chad and Anthony.
They are super excited
to be getting married in just two weeks.
But their wedding planning
has spiraled out of control
and snowballed into an over-the-top
weekend-long festival
to celebrate their love.
So to help Chad and Anthony
reel in their wedding festival,
I'm enlisting my friend,
comedian Punkie Johnson,
whose refreshingly honest take on marriage
will definitely help Chad and Anthony.
We gotta get these boys down the aisle.
[upbeat music playing]
So we met about two and a half years ago
on this dating app.
I swiped left first
because I had an ex, Chad,
and I was like, "There's no way
that's happening again."
But, uh, there was some kind
of glitch or something
because there he came back up
two days after.
[Chad] It was magic
from the very beginning,
and things went fast from there.
There's so many qualities
about Anthony that I love.
I mean, he is driven, and he's smart,
he can fix anything.
Basically, he's just a great person,
and I love it. [chuckles]
Chad is very much an empath,
and he's just so good at gauging
how to make people feel better,
and he's so funny.
A year later, I decided I wanna propose
to him, so I planned a surprise party.
I had no idea.
I was sitting down in the chair
watching this music video that he made,
and he finishes
the music video off singing
and at the end of the song, he proposes.
He didn't finish, and I'm like
- Fuck, yes!
- [woman laughs]
[crowd cheering]
It was a special moment.
We are planning something
a little different for our wedding.
So what started out
as a wedding for 150 people
turned into a wedding festival
of a thousand people.
[Chad] We have drag queens coming in.
We have clothing vendors,
silent disco, karaoke, food trucks,
a hot air balloon over the Ferris wheel.
Did we know what we were getting into?
Absolutely not.
[Anthony] What's happened is because
the stress is starting to build up,
the fun of it is going away
and we're losing that vision.
I do see a little bit
of a divide between us
just because there are things
we have to work on,
like insecurities, communicating.
Yeah, we need Jamie
to come in and help us
with just kind of putting it all together.
[Chad chuckling]
[upbeat music playing]
[Anthony] We'll project the laser.
Have you heard of mapping?
- Uh
- Laser mapping.
- Hey, guys!
- [both] Hi!
- [Lee] Hi! It's so nice to meet you!
- [Chad chuckles] Oh, my gosh.
- [Lee] Hi, Anthony!
- [Chad] It's like we know each other.
I know! Oh, this is gonna be so fun.
- Yay!
- How are you guys?
- [both] We're good. [chuckle]
- [Lee laughs] Thank God.
- How's it going?
- Overwhelmed.
- [Lee] Yeah.
- Uh
It's a lot.
It's been such a roller coaster.
- It's nuts, like
- Yeah.
It's just like all this pressure
that's put on this one particular day,
and it kind of makes you wish there were
other days you could have the festival,
so the festival
wasn't coinciding with the wedding.
That's where it gets complicated
because the wedding itself
- We've heard that.
- [Lee]is complicated.
I am so stressed out for these two.
Why? Why do this to yourself? Why?
My wedding only had 125 guests,
and I still felt
like I built the fucking pyramids.
They are taking on so much.
Wedding perfection is unattainable,
so you have to shift your perspective.
I don't want you guys
to get caught up in the outcome
as much as just try to enjoy it.
Manage expectations.
It's manage expectations,
but it's also that
without the two of you,
none of this is anything.
- You know?
- [Chad] I know.
We definitely kinda lost that a little.
- Yeah.
- [Chad chuckles]
- [Lee] Alright.
- Well, she's gonna help us!
[Lee] I am gonna help you.
I wanna make sure you guys are good
because that is the forever
of the Forever Wedfest brand.
- [both] Yeah.
- You're the forever, not the festival.
- The festival is one weekend.
- Yeah, you're right.
I'm not here to knock it.
I went to Bonnaroo.
You should see me at a festival.
I wear full long sleeves
and like a big sun hat.
I look like Diane Keaton
if she took up beekeeping.
- [Chad] I love her.
- I look like a wreck. Um, OK. [laughs]
But you have this big event,
you have this big spectacle,
where does the love
that you share get represented?
The 20-minute dance,
that's how we fit in here.
- With our performance.
- [Lee] Mm-hmm.
So I really wanna have
a grand entrance dance routine
introducing Anthony and myself.
So I've really been working hard on it,
but Anthony's not exactly the
the dancing type.
Trying to do choreographed dancing,
for me, uh-uh, doesn't happen.
- I'm worried.
- [Anthony] Yeah.
I wish I could get a stunt double
to take his spot for the performance.
- Your mom, how are you feeling?
- [Chad] She's cool.
I know you were having some stress
about her outfit for the wedding.
- Talk to me about Mom's fashion.
- I It's just weird.
A, she has this weird
kind of like a country fashion -
just like tube tops
and jean skirts and bandana.
- She will wear a flannel shirt.
- Here's the thing though.
You wanna make sure
your mom feels supported.
- Yeah, literally.
- [Lee] And that she feels comfortable.
OK, yes, literally.
But it is also a festival.
If she takes off her bra,
she'll be on brand.
I love my mom so much.
I want her to look stunning and beautiful.
As two grooms, there's no bride.
We got to have our moms be the brides.
Looking fierce.
You guys are so overwhelmed.
You're taking on so much stuff.
The stress and emotional complexity
of planning a wedding,
you literally are in this state
of thinking that you need to do so much
and create so much, have this huge event,
and this shit is hard.
- [Chad] Yeah.
- We're gonna get you through this.
- We are.
- Thank you.
- You need support. You need help.
- Yeah, I know.
[upbeat music playing]
- [Lee] You see the rattlesnake sign?
- [Punkie] I see it, girl.
They're "in season."
In season like it's Christmas.
Uh-uh. I shouldn't have worn shorts.
I'm scared.
Punkie, I'm so thrilled that you're here.
Chad and Anthony are planning a festival
in addition to a wedding.
They're having go-go dancers,
food trucks, aerial dancers.
- Oh!
- [Lee] Yeah!
So they're having a circus?
But just long as none of 'em dies.
- See, I died at my wedding. Um
- [laughs]
I was working very hard,
I had to pay for it myself,
and I was exhausted.
I told everybody I'd be right back,
I just wanna go take a nap.
And I went to sleep
and I just never woke up.
Whoa!
Then I woke up in the ambulance.
They're like, "Do you know where you at?"
I'm cursing them out.
Like, "Yeah, bitch. I'm at my wedding."
I'm like, "I just had to take a nap."
They got pictures of me
with my middle finger up.
Where was your wife?
She's still at the party?
- Oh, she's just chillin'.
- "She'll be fine." [laughs]
Alright, so Anthony
is not naturally a dancer,
so Chad is trying
to teach Anthony this dance,
and guess how long the dance is.
Mm, five minutes? Maybe six minutes?
- Twenty minutes.
- Twenty minutes?
A twenty-minute dance? Oh, God.
They better have the Tootsie Roll
in this dance.
- [laughs]
- [Punkie] I'll accept that.
- So, you remember?
- No, I don't remember anything.
Um It's like "I waited"
- Then what did you do after you do this?
- You right, left.
- Are you stepping right first with this?
- Yes.
What's the intro part when it starts?
- Hey, guys! I brought a friend.
- [Punkie] Whoa.
- Sexier than what I thought. Oh, my God.
- [Chad laughs]
- You are so fine.
- This is Punkie.
- I wanna hug at the same time.
- I'm sweaty.
- We have a thing going with the socks.
- [Chad] We do.
Like, huh, and a little bit of
I wore cheer socks.
- [Punkie] Oh!
- [Lee] Oh! [laughs]
They are fired up.
We need to see this dance.
So, obviously,
there's a 20-minute performance.
The dancers come onstage, and there's 14,
and they have a whole routine to do.
We come on the aisle
and we reach them by the chorus.
After that, we rip off the jackets
and we're in the little Bruno Mars song.
Her mouth is open.
- [Chad] The dancers are doing the stuff.
- I'm amazed.
Yeah, then the Britney section happens,
then we go into a Gaga section.
Oh, so this is a whole
Superbowl performance.
Yeah, that's kinda what I got inspired by.
- OK. Alright.
- [Chad] Ready?
[pop music playing]
Oh, yeah. Wasn't this, like,
right leg or something first?
[Chad] It doesn't matter. Whatever.
Wait. I'm gonna stop. [laughing]
[pop music continues]
[Anthony and Chad chuckling]
Then, we come together.
- [Lee] Cute.
- I talk to the audience.
- So it kind of goes low
- Wait. Where's he gonna go?
[Chad] Backstage
and wait for his next thing.
- Wanna show 'em? Show 'em!
- [Lee] Yeah, I wanna see.
- [Lee] You're great.
- [Chad] You have to.
- [Anthony] I can't do it just like that!
- Show 'em.
- I can't even
- Do the thing you do, like this.
- I don't even know!
- He goes like this.
- He goes like
- But I have to have loud music.
- [Chad] Just do the thing! Come on, do it.
- [Anthony] Oh, my God. I can't do this.
No! Anthony!
[tense music plays]
[Chad] They see we're falling apart.
Like, you have to clear your mind
and learn to focus on one thing.
- [Anthony] Yeah, right. Impossible.
- Put yourself in that moment, you know?
You're holding on to so much,
filling with what you're mad about.
[Anthony] That's just recently
from all that happened.
What is happening?
That dance routine
felt like it was all Chad
and very little Anthony.
You have to make sure
you really hear your partner
and what they're comfortable with.
It's true in the bedroom,
and it's true by the pool.
OK. Here's the thing.
Twenty minutes is a really long time.
Only Beyoncé can dance for 20 minutes.
Even then I look at my phone for some.
I know it's a lot, but it's what I am.
I thought it told a story.
[Anthony] It's intimidating.
I don't know how to dance.
It's a lot for him to memorize
as someone who doesn't really dance.
There's already enough
to be stressed about on your wedding day.
You don't need to add, "Will I pull off
twerking around minute 13?"
- [Chad] That's a fear of mine, too.
- [Lee] It's a stress that you don't need.
Like, maybe ten minutes,
and I'll have a minute.
[bird tweeting]
Are we hearing what your partner's saying?
He wants one minute.
You guys have such good pure love.
I really mean that.
- [Chad] Thank you.
- [Lee] So, like, let that be the dance.
- I'm not anti-dance.
- [Chad] No, I hear you.
I want you guys
to want whatever you want.
I just don't want you to bite off
more than you can chew.
Yeah. Don't stress yourself out.
You got the rest of your life to do that.
These two are getting lost in the wrong
details in planning this wedding.
- Yeah.
- It's about performance, spectacle.
I'm really hoping
they pare the dance down.
Yeah, 'cause I would be
at the taco truck at minute four.
[scoffs] Uh, same.
- I would miss the entire thing.
- Like, "I get it."
- "Alright, time for some chilaquiles."
- Yeah, cute.
Now I have to go help Chad's mom
find something to wear for this wedding.
I mean, how to dress
for a wedding festival?
I don't think anyone really knows
what that dress code entails.
So we'll figure it out.
- [Chad] Look at you! [chuckles]
- Hi! I'm all zhuzhed.
- I know, you are zhuzhed.
- I'm kind of channeling Ariana right now.
- You actually really are. Show me a move.
- A little bit.
I feel like this store is great for moms
because even though you're saying
you want the moms
to be a little more formal,
you're still at a festival.
- Yeah.
- So I think it can be "desert formal."
- Which is a genre I just created.
- [woman] Hi.
- [Lee] Hi, Sheryl!
- [Chad] Hi!
- [Lee] It's so nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you, too.
How are you feeling about this wedding?
- Oh, yeah. OK.
- Your thoughts. I want the mom hard truth.
I'm feeling, you know, good about it,
but I do feel like it is way over the top.
I just want them to have a good time,
and I'm afraid they're so focused on,
you know, this big show and production
that they might get something lost
in the midst of it all, but
But you're gonna look fabulous.
You haven't bought anything yet
for the wedding.
- [Sheryl] I have not.
- Talk to me about where you're at.
Well, didn't you say
you wanted like tan or gold
We were talking, and I was pushing
a little more of a fancy thing on you.
She's like,
"Why not let mom feel comfortable?"
- I want you to wear what you enjoy.
- [Sheryl] That feels like me.
- [Chad] I like that idea.
- Yeah!
- Let's find you something to wear.
- OK.
Let's look around.
- So are we opposed to this?
- Yes, we are.
It just looks like a tent, though.
- [Chad] Just try it.
- I really hate it to be honest.
- Now I really want her to try it.
- OK, if she hates it
Watch, you're gonna put it on
- I feel like it's, "Uh!"
- Gosh! Are you kidding?
[laughs] When you go like that.
I think it's striking that balance
between wanting to up the ante
a little bit fashion-wise,
but also wanting to be supportive
and encouraging and build her up.
I mean, it's so not you,
but it's not horrible.
- [woman] I need to help you.
- OK, yes. See?
- I knew something had to be wrong.
- So, these two straps belong right here.
[Sheryl] Oh! OK!
You don't want to come with me, do you?
- [saleswoman] Yeah, I can help you.
- Thank you. That'd be great. Thanks.
- OK, there?
- [saleswoman] Yes, I think so.
[giggling]
There's a lot happening over here.
- [Sheryl] Oh, my goodness. Yes!
- [Chad chuckles]
[Lee] Are they having sex in there?
- "Oh, that's new." [laughs]
- "Yes. Oh! OK!"
[saleswoman] Just make sure
you put this one through the hole
- [Lee laughing]
- [Chad whispers] Is this really happening?
- [Lee] Oh, my God. [laughs]
- [Chad] Thank you. Let's see. And
- [Lee] Oh!
- [Chad] Oh!
- Oh, I like it better.
- Ooh, yeah, way better.
It's a nice, flattering style, so
- Let's try that black one.
- Yeah, let's try the black.
OK, it's obviously a little big.
- But I really like that on you.
- Wait a minute. Mom.
[Chad] No, are you kidding?
[Lee] It's just a little big,
but the shape is really cool.
Mom, yeah, actually,
you need to let loose.
It doesn't feel like me to me.
It's fun to see you in different things.
Yeah, I mean it is nice
to think outside of the box.
[Lee] Ooh!
- How do you feel?
- [Sheryl] Oh, I like it. I do.
I like this color a lot and,
um, the style and everything.
Yeah, I'm really happy.
- I mean, I don't know.
- [Sheryl] Oh, well, thank you.
What I love about your mom
is that she's so youthful and vibrant,
so you can't put her
in the typical mom box.
Yeah.
You have to make sure that the box
fits her, not the other way around.
Chad wants his mom
to wear the black and white floral,
but he has to realize
that people are gonna dress
based on their own style,
vanity, and body concerns.
I'm hoping Chad will just let go
of some of his control issues
and allow his mom to wear
whatever she feels good in.
I know. I guess I need to sit back
and count all my blessings.
- Yeah.
- It's crazy.
As I figure things out,
like the dance and stuff, it's true,
I'd rather just have an event
that people are happy being there.
That's the most important part.
People are gonna be happy
as long as you guys are happy.
- I know. It's just hard.
- Yeah.
Anthony seems like such a sweetheart,
and he seems to love you so much.
No, he does. I mean, we do. That's
But, obviously,
with just these last few months it's
it's becoming so disconnected.
It stinks. Like, it's yeah.
- I know.
- So I don't know.
It's obvious Chad
and Anthony love each other,
but it's also obvious that
they're pretty disconnected at this point.
You can't keep something like that inside.
No, and I don't think the strategy
is to force them to talk to each other,
like I'm some kind of couples counselor.
So I have an idea for how to approach it
with a little bit of levity.
Ah!
- [Chad laughs]
- [Punkie] Welcome, ladies and gentlemen!
We're gonna play a little game
called "The Nearlywed Game."
And now, if you all join in
in giving it up for your host, Jamie Lee.
- [they applaud]
- Punkie Johnson, everybody.
My Vanna White. Well, my Vanna Black.
- Here she is. [laughs]
- Hello.
- [laughs] I love it.
- Welcome to The Nearlywed Game.
- [Chad] Oh, man.
- I'm Jamie Lee.
I'm the perfect host
for The Nearlywed Game
as planning my wedding was so stressful,
I nearly didn't get married. [laughing]
[Chad laughing]
[Lee] Guys,
the rules of the game are simple.
I'll ask you a series of questions
about your relationship,
and you will write down your answers
on these dry erase boards.
- OK. Are you guys ready to play?
- Ready.
- [Punkie] I'm ready.
- I'm ready!
Let's do this. What is something
that Chad does that moves you?
[clock ticking]
OK, spin it around.
- [Punkie] I knew it.
- [Lee] "Sing joke"?
- [Anthony] Sing and joke.
- [Chad] Oh, it's true!
Oh, sing and joke. That's so sweet!
- [Lee] Aw!
- [Punkie] Aw!
[Lee] I'm feeling very optimistic. OK.
- Who is Chad's celebrity crush?
- [Punkie] Mm.
- [chuckles]
- Oh, my God.
- [Lee] What do you think you're putting?
- Wait, is this for real? OK.
[Lee] OK. One, two, three!
- [Punkie] Keller.
- [Lee] Who?
- [Chad] Oh, my God. I'm not a porn
- I don't know.
- I'm not a porn freak at all.
- Yes, you are.
- Is it a porn star?
- It's a porn star.
Colby Keller sounds like a folk artist
that would play on, like, the WB Network.
- [chuckles] He looks like that.
- [Lee] It sounds so innocent.
- Keller.
- Yeah, exactly. Oh, my gosh.
You did great in round one.
Round two is not gonna be so easy.
Alright, here we go.
Which word describes your
wedding planning experience right now?
- Joyful, meaningful, stressful, insane.
- [Chad sighs]
[clock ticking]
And reveal your answers.
"Insane." "Stressful."
I feel like stressful lands in insane.
Yeah, but they're
- I feel like insane covers it all.
- Yeah.
- But right now you feel insane?
- I do.
I feel like everything's kinda
out of control and we're You know?
- In the planning?
- Yeah. Don't you think?
- Hum No, I think stressful. [chuckles]
- Anthony, why stressful?
You know, we're realizing things
about each other
that we never would have seen
in another circumstance.
It's easy, the honeymoon phase is easy,
because you just block out all the bad
and just see the good,
but then when you have family
and friends and their influence
and their ideas of what it should be,
this and that, you know, it's stressful.
When I was getting married, hardest time
of my life, under constant stress.
- I think you felt that way.
- Mm-hmm.
I'm just trying to understand the root
of what's really going on with you guys.
[Chad] Um, it's hard to admit this,
but we are having some issues.
So I do live in fear,
and it causes insecurities.
But him, he wants to communicate it
all the time, all the time,
every day, every moment,
at 1:45 last night.
- [Chad] No.
- At 6:00 a.m.
So I'm like, "I just want to sleep."
He can forget negative things
and move on quick and be great.
I can't, I have to figure it out,
fix it, and then move on.
Right, but then when we do that,
more often than not,
it's almost like festering or spiraling.
It's a snowball effect.
Now there's more emotion
and then more anger. You know?
I don't understand why you can't just do
whatever it takes to make me feel safe.
I guess I feel that I don't want
to perpetuate an insecurity and feed it.
Honestly, your running
and your not talking about it
and the attitude
makes me feel resentment and hurt
and, like, "Oh, my gosh,
I'm right here, let's fix it."
Alright, guys.
Well, I love you. Punkie loves you.
- You know I love you.
- Relationships are really complicated.
Even if you get married,
they stay complicated.
So I think you guys have some things
to discuss, some things to figure out.
Communication and transparency.
- It's so important in a relationship.
- Yeah.
Especially when you're starting
to build a life together.
You don't want to start from a place of,
"We don't talk in an open and honest way."
You wanna start with like,
"Hey, here's how I'm feeling."
- "How are you feeling?"
- Yeah.
- "Here's how I am."
- [Lee chuckles]
"Here's how I am as a person.
Now I'm seeing who you are as a person."
You know, "Do we align?"
[upbeat music plays]
[Chad] I'm excited to see this.
- Do they have to charge?
- They take a couple of minutes to heat up.
- [Chad] Hello. [chuckles]
- [Lee] Hi!
[Chad] Just in time.
We're about to blow stuff up.
- No, don't do it!
- [they laugh]
- [Lee] What is this?
- [Chad] They're safe sparks.
- Is this gonna be like literal Fyre Fest?
- [Chad] Ready.
- No, it's
- Oh, literally! [laughs]
- [Chad] Is it one?
- We're gonna burn Uh, yeah.
- [Chad] Ready?
- No, I'm so scared.
You guys burst into flames.
- I'll be over here. [laughs]
- It's timed.
- [Anthony chuckles]
- [whirring]
- [Chad] Oh, look.
- [Lee screams]
Don't touch it! Don't do it!
- [Chad] Isn't that cool?
- No!
- It's cool. It's safe.
- Stop it!
So we're gonna come in
and be like [grunts]
- Duh, duh. Oh!
- [they laugh]
- We gotta work on the timing.
- [Chad] OK, yeah.
- OK, guys.
- [Chad] So, that's that.
Wow.
Chad and Anthony
are drowning in festival planning.
Listen to me, planning a wedding
is not building a marriage.
I know that Chad and Anthony
really love each other,
but it's clear
their relationship needs work.
So I think it's safe to say
The Nearlywed Game got a little intense.
I just wanted to come and check up on you,
see how you're doing.
Um. [sighs]
- That was a deep sigh.
- [Chad] I know.
I mean, no, we're good.
At least we think we're good.
I think it's just hard. I think [sighs]
- [somber music plays]
- [Chad sobbing]
[Lee] Chad!
[continues sobbing]
I just don't feel like it's
I don't know.
Just think the festival's
taking over everything.
- [Lee] Yeah.
- [continues sobbing]
Well, I feel for the two of you
because I think it's very relatable
what you're going through.
My husband and I
barely made it to the altar.
I mean, we were suffering.
I didn't know we were capable
of arguing to that degree
during our wedding planning
- Did that scare you?
- Yes, 100%.
People kind of
kick the term "stress" around
in this sort of like fun, frivolous way.
- It's not funny.
- No one gets it.
People can get sick from stress.
Physically,
you can make yourself really sick.
This is why
I don't like the term, "Big Day."
I think it diminishes
other great days in your life.
Marriage. Sure. All about marriage.
I think marriage is solid.
But I think that marriage
is a less crazy concept to me
than planning a wedding.
- Yeah. Definitely.
- [Lee] Yeah.
- That's good advice.
- [Chad sighs]
- [knocking on door]
- [Lee] Hello?
- [Chad] Hello?
- [Lee] Hi!
- Tony?
- [Chad] Hi. Come on in.
- Yeah. Welcome. Have a seat.
- [Anthony chuckles]
- Um, how are you guys doing?
- We're good. [sighs]
- [Lee] Yeah?
- Just, you know, a lot.
Where are you at right now?
Um
Where are we at? [chuckles]
We've We've really talked
about a lot of things,
but I think we both decided that,
you know, it just
just doesn't seem right or feasible
to push on with the wedding.
So as crazy as that is
- OK.
- [Anthony] I know.
We've had some issues
obviously between us,
and we're thinking that that might be
something that if we do away with that,
then maybe it'll save us,
and obviously that's worth it.
He's opened up a lot recently
about the stress and what he feels,
things he's never really
said to me before.
It's scary because these things come up
and you're like, "Oh, my gosh.
We can't quit a wedding."
"The guests, the money,
the people, the things."
Then as you talk more you go,
"Wait a minute, none of it matters.
What are we running from?"
- We're right here.
- You know what?
In my mind, the way I'm thinking is like
I don't feel like y'all calling it off.
- I just feel it's more of a postponing
- [Lee] Mm-hmm. A pause.
You're allowed to take a moment
and be a little bummed
about calling off a wedding.
Yeah. So how do we cancel this thing?
I actually think
canceling a wedding is very simple.
[Punkie] Mm-hmm.
The emotions attached to it
are not gonna be simple.
You guys have to make space for that.
That's what you'll deal with as a couple.
Do you think an explanation is due
of kind of where we're at?
So they don't wonder
"We're still together, still love
each other, not going anywhere."
We're not canceling the relationship,
but we are canceling the wedding.
Canceling your wedding
feels huge and embarrassing,
but in reality,
nobody is surprised by anything anymore.
You do not owe anyone
an explanation for your life choices.
What about a commitment event
and celebrate our love with everyone,
and then when we're ready,
no matter how far away it is,
- we can go and sign the paper.
- Or how many people.
- Yes.
- [Chad] So
Then people get to see us and they go,
"Hey, you know what? They're good."
So instead of having a big wedding,
we're gonna celebrate us being together
and we're gonna throw a huge party,
have our same friends and family there.
Less stress, less pressure to perform.
It's just come enjoy us.
Let's be all together and yeah.
- What it should have been.
- Yeah.
We've stopped the wedding,
but saved our relationship.
It's actually a super blessing.
Yeah, I feel better.
- I'm so glad.
- [Chad] I'm thankful.
- Everything happens for a reason.
- The weight that came off my shoulders.
It's very scary to call off this festival,
and I think that it took
an extra level of bravery
for them to be like, "We just need
to focus on our relationship
and let everything else fall away
for the time being."
Plus, like, a zero pressure wedding?
- Oh, hell yeah.
- [scoffs] It's a dream. That is the dream.
And now I'm pissed and jealous.
[laughing]
[upbeat music playing]
[Lee] Oh, my God. I'm so excited.
- Hi!
- How are you?
Oh, my God!
- [Punkie] I love your hair to the front.
- Happy day!
- Happy day, I know.
- Happy day!
- [Anthony] I got a job for you.
- [gasps] Give it to me.
OK, so you're gonna screw
each of these down to these posts.
[Lee] OK.
- [Punkie] We gotta get this done right.
- [Lee] Yeah!
Chad and Anthony made a mature choice
to pump the brakes
and prioritize their relationship
right now.
We did it!
I don't want them to worry about
next steps or what the future holds.
I want them to simply enjoy each other
after all they've been through.
[funky guitar music playing]
- [Sheryl] Hi, Jamie.
- Sheryl! Look at you!
Hi. How are you?
- Oh, my goodness!
- Hi.
- OK, you look positively radiant.
- Thank you.
- You're wearing the dress we picked out!
- Yes.
- And you're wearing matching earrings!
- Yeah, and a bracelet.
- Oh, my goodness! You look great.
- Thank you.
- How do you feel about this event?
- I'm fine with it.
I'm just glad they're together,
and we're all gonna be a family one day.
Chad, I know,
has really been working on himself,
and just trying to,
you know, do a little inventory.
So good things have happened
in that respect.
So that's all I can ask for.
- [party music playing]
- [indistinct chatter]
- Hi.
- Hi.
- How are you?
- I'm good.
- [Lee] Are you good?
- I'm good!
- Yeah? How are you feeling?
- Yeah.
I just feel like
I just want to get this part over with.
- But in a good way.
- What part?
Well, I mean, we have to like now address
obviously all of our people,
and, you know,
everything we've gone through.
- So I just want it to be good.
- Hey. Look at me.
All these people here
are like obsessed with you.
- They adore you.
- [Punkie] Big time.
You're around people
who are like already team Chanthony.
They know you.
You don't have to posture.
- You know what I mean?
- Yeah.
OK. Here we go. Come on.
- Hey, guys!
- Hi, everyone!
- [Lee] Hi, everybody! How are you?
- [guests cheering]
I'm feeling so emotional,
but luckily there's three dessert options
for me to eat my feelings, so
Please don't fall in the pool, ma'am.
You're very close to the edge.
OK, guys, without further ado,
I'm gonna bring up
the reason we are all here.
Clap it up for the fabulous,
the gorgeous
Chanthony!
- [guests cheer]
- Meow, meow!
- What's up, handsomes?
- [Chad] Hello.
- Hi, ladies. Aw.
- [guest laughing]
Well, we're here.
[guests cheering]
A lot of you have been so supportive
and loving, and I appreciate everything.
[woman] We love you!
- [Chad] Love you guys so much. Thank you.
- [cheering]
- Woo! Chad!
- [man] We love you.
I know we have such an amazing thing,
and you are my soulmate,
like I would do anything
and everything for you.
When we get married, and we will,
and we'll be together forever,
it'll be deserved.
[cheering]
I'm not going to say it as well as he did,
but I love you all so much.
- And I love this man so much.
- [cheering]
And thank you
for taking this journey with us.
[guests cheering]
I feel like after this whole process,
we are in a totally new,
healthier direction,
a new chapter in our lives.
It's pretty ironic that we, uh,
asked Jamie to come and help us,
you know, with the wedding festival
and help us put it together,
and she ended up
helping our relationship.
So we're actually
gonna do a small ritual.
Are you guys on board for that?
- [cheers]
- [Lee] OK.
We're gonna do a lantern ceremony.
We have these lanterns,
and you're gonna write something
from the past that you want to let go of,
and you're gonna set it free,
because tonight is all about
living in the moment
and looking forward
towards the future.
- Are you guys into that?
- [cheers]
Honestly, we never even needed
all the flashy stuff we were doing.
We do have a really good love.
We have a great connection.
Having a third party like Jamie coming in,
we took full advantage
of her straightforward comedic energy
and instead of putting that energy
into the wedding,
it became about us, which we needed.
We didn't even really know we needed it.
And it helped a lot.
[uplifting music playing]
What did you write on your lantern?
I put my wife's name down.
I got to get rid of this bitch.
I put the dog's name.
You want to get rid of the dog
and the house?
- I can't handle it no more.
- [laughs]
I just want to be by myself,
just for a little while.
- Wanna see what I put?
- Yeah.
"That time I got baby bangs
and ended up looking like Post Malone."
- Cheers, man, I love ya.
- [Punkie] Cheers. I love you, too.
[Lee over microphone] Five, four, three
- Two, one!
- [Punkie] One!
Release!
[guests cheering]
[dance music playing]
Tonight think of me as DJ Panda Postponed.
[guests cheer]
Because we're saying,
"Bam-boo to Big Bridal!"
[guests cheer]
This whole thing,
it didn't turn out as we expected,
but not everything is gonna be wrapped up
in a big fluffy pink bow.
[Punkie] They went through their trial,
their tribulation, they came out on top.
- I'm just like, "Fuck, yes."
- Same.
[all shouting]
- [Chad] Thank you guys so much.
- [Lee] We love you!
This honestly
is making me want a Popsicle.
- For real?
- Do you think it tastes good?
- You know, I don't know what this is.
- It tastes like foam.
- [sighs] What if you bite it this way?
- But
- No. Still gross. Still gross.
- Yeah, tear it up.
[upbeat music plays]
actress, author, and former bride.
A few years ago, I got married.
Was it magical? Kinda.
Was planning it a bit of a nightmare?
[dramatic music intensifying]
Yes.
In fact,
I found wedding planning so ridiculous
that I wrote a book about it!
Here's the thing.
The wedding industry wants you to believe
that everything should be perfect,
but that's some bullshit.
There's no need for a wedding expert.
You just need someone who's lived
through it to do your dirty work.
I'll be there to help couples
get to the finish line,
and I'll be bringing along
some of my friends to help.
Consider me the wedding coach!
Do I have pit stains?
Ooh, la, la, la, la
Do, do, do, do, do, do it ♪
Ooh, la, la, la, la
Do, do, do, do, do, do it ♪
[upbeat music playing]
[Lee] It's Babe City, USA, population two.
Chad and Anthony.
They are super excited
to be getting married in just two weeks.
But their wedding planning
has spiraled out of control
and snowballed into an over-the-top
weekend-long festival
to celebrate their love.
So to help Chad and Anthony
reel in their wedding festival,
I'm enlisting my friend,
comedian Punkie Johnson,
whose refreshingly honest take on marriage
will definitely help Chad and Anthony.
We gotta get these boys down the aisle.
[upbeat music playing]
So we met about two and a half years ago
on this dating app.
I swiped left first
because I had an ex, Chad,
and I was like, "There's no way
that's happening again."
But, uh, there was some kind
of glitch or something
because there he came back up
two days after.
[Chad] It was magic
from the very beginning,
and things went fast from there.
There's so many qualities
about Anthony that I love.
I mean, he is driven, and he's smart,
he can fix anything.
Basically, he's just a great person,
and I love it. [chuckles]
Chad is very much an empath,
and he's just so good at gauging
how to make people feel better,
and he's so funny.
A year later, I decided I wanna propose
to him, so I planned a surprise party.
I had no idea.
I was sitting down in the chair
watching this music video that he made,
and he finishes
the music video off singing
and at the end of the song, he proposes.
He didn't finish, and I'm like
- Fuck, yes!
- [woman laughs]
[crowd cheering]
It was a special moment.
We are planning something
a little different for our wedding.
So what started out
as a wedding for 150 people
turned into a wedding festival
of a thousand people.
[Chad] We have drag queens coming in.
We have clothing vendors,
silent disco, karaoke, food trucks,
a hot air balloon over the Ferris wheel.
Did we know what we were getting into?
Absolutely not.
[Anthony] What's happened is because
the stress is starting to build up,
the fun of it is going away
and we're losing that vision.
I do see a little bit
of a divide between us
just because there are things
we have to work on,
like insecurities, communicating.
Yeah, we need Jamie
to come in and help us
with just kind of putting it all together.
[Chad chuckling]
[upbeat music playing]
[Anthony] We'll project the laser.
Have you heard of mapping?
- Uh
- Laser mapping.
- Hey, guys!
- [both] Hi!
- [Lee] Hi! It's so nice to meet you!
- [Chad chuckles] Oh, my gosh.
- [Lee] Hi, Anthony!
- [Chad] It's like we know each other.
I know! Oh, this is gonna be so fun.
- Yay!
- How are you guys?
- [both] We're good. [chuckle]
- [Lee laughs] Thank God.
- How's it going?
- Overwhelmed.
- [Lee] Yeah.
- Uh
It's a lot.
It's been such a roller coaster.
- It's nuts, like
- Yeah.
It's just like all this pressure
that's put on this one particular day,
and it kind of makes you wish there were
other days you could have the festival,
so the festival
wasn't coinciding with the wedding.
That's where it gets complicated
because the wedding itself
- We've heard that.
- [Lee]is complicated.
I am so stressed out for these two.
Why? Why do this to yourself? Why?
My wedding only had 125 guests,
and I still felt
like I built the fucking pyramids.
They are taking on so much.
Wedding perfection is unattainable,
so you have to shift your perspective.
I don't want you guys
to get caught up in the outcome
as much as just try to enjoy it.
Manage expectations.
It's manage expectations,
but it's also that
without the two of you,
none of this is anything.
- You know?
- [Chad] I know.
We definitely kinda lost that a little.
- Yeah.
- [Chad chuckles]
- [Lee] Alright.
- Well, she's gonna help us!
[Lee] I am gonna help you.
I wanna make sure you guys are good
because that is the forever
of the Forever Wedfest brand.
- [both] Yeah.
- You're the forever, not the festival.
- The festival is one weekend.
- Yeah, you're right.
I'm not here to knock it.
I went to Bonnaroo.
You should see me at a festival.
I wear full long sleeves
and like a big sun hat.
I look like Diane Keaton
if she took up beekeeping.
- [Chad] I love her.
- I look like a wreck. Um, OK. [laughs]
But you have this big event,
you have this big spectacle,
where does the love
that you share get represented?
The 20-minute dance,
that's how we fit in here.
- With our performance.
- [Lee] Mm-hmm.
So I really wanna have
a grand entrance dance routine
introducing Anthony and myself.
So I've really been working hard on it,
but Anthony's not exactly the
the dancing type.
Trying to do choreographed dancing,
for me, uh-uh, doesn't happen.
- I'm worried.
- [Anthony] Yeah.
I wish I could get a stunt double
to take his spot for the performance.
- Your mom, how are you feeling?
- [Chad] She's cool.
I know you were having some stress
about her outfit for the wedding.
- Talk to me about Mom's fashion.
- I It's just weird.
A, she has this weird
kind of like a country fashion -
just like tube tops
and jean skirts and bandana.
- She will wear a flannel shirt.
- Here's the thing though.
You wanna make sure
your mom feels supported.
- Yeah, literally.
- [Lee] And that she feels comfortable.
OK, yes, literally.
But it is also a festival.
If she takes off her bra,
she'll be on brand.
I love my mom so much.
I want her to look stunning and beautiful.
As two grooms, there's no bride.
We got to have our moms be the brides.
Looking fierce.
You guys are so overwhelmed.
You're taking on so much stuff.
The stress and emotional complexity
of planning a wedding,
you literally are in this state
of thinking that you need to do so much
and create so much, have this huge event,
and this shit is hard.
- [Chad] Yeah.
- We're gonna get you through this.
- We are.
- Thank you.
- You need support. You need help.
- Yeah, I know.
[upbeat music playing]
- [Lee] You see the rattlesnake sign?
- [Punkie] I see it, girl.
They're "in season."
In season like it's Christmas.
Uh-uh. I shouldn't have worn shorts.
I'm scared.
Punkie, I'm so thrilled that you're here.
Chad and Anthony are planning a festival
in addition to a wedding.
They're having go-go dancers,
food trucks, aerial dancers.
- Oh!
- [Lee] Yeah!
So they're having a circus?
But just long as none of 'em dies.
- See, I died at my wedding. Um
- [laughs]
I was working very hard,
I had to pay for it myself,
and I was exhausted.
I told everybody I'd be right back,
I just wanna go take a nap.
And I went to sleep
and I just never woke up.
Whoa!
Then I woke up in the ambulance.
They're like, "Do you know where you at?"
I'm cursing them out.
Like, "Yeah, bitch. I'm at my wedding."
I'm like, "I just had to take a nap."
They got pictures of me
with my middle finger up.
Where was your wife?
She's still at the party?
- Oh, she's just chillin'.
- "She'll be fine." [laughs]
Alright, so Anthony
is not naturally a dancer,
so Chad is trying
to teach Anthony this dance,
and guess how long the dance is.
Mm, five minutes? Maybe six minutes?
- Twenty minutes.
- Twenty minutes?
A twenty-minute dance? Oh, God.
They better have the Tootsie Roll
in this dance.
- [laughs]
- [Punkie] I'll accept that.
- So, you remember?
- No, I don't remember anything.
Um It's like "I waited"
- Then what did you do after you do this?
- You right, left.
- Are you stepping right first with this?
- Yes.
What's the intro part when it starts?
- Hey, guys! I brought a friend.
- [Punkie] Whoa.
- Sexier than what I thought. Oh, my God.
- [Chad laughs]
- You are so fine.
- This is Punkie.
- I wanna hug at the same time.
- I'm sweaty.
- We have a thing going with the socks.
- [Chad] We do.
Like, huh, and a little bit of
I wore cheer socks.
- [Punkie] Oh!
- [Lee] Oh! [laughs]
They are fired up.
We need to see this dance.
So, obviously,
there's a 20-minute performance.
The dancers come onstage, and there's 14,
and they have a whole routine to do.
We come on the aisle
and we reach them by the chorus.
After that, we rip off the jackets
and we're in the little Bruno Mars song.
Her mouth is open.
- [Chad] The dancers are doing the stuff.
- I'm amazed.
Yeah, then the Britney section happens,
then we go into a Gaga section.
Oh, so this is a whole
Superbowl performance.
Yeah, that's kinda what I got inspired by.
- OK. Alright.
- [Chad] Ready?
[pop music playing]
Oh, yeah. Wasn't this, like,
right leg or something first?
[Chad] It doesn't matter. Whatever.
Wait. I'm gonna stop. [laughing]
[pop music continues]
[Anthony and Chad chuckling]
Then, we come together.
- [Lee] Cute.
- I talk to the audience.
- So it kind of goes low
- Wait. Where's he gonna go?
[Chad] Backstage
and wait for his next thing.
- Wanna show 'em? Show 'em!
- [Lee] Yeah, I wanna see.
- [Lee] You're great.
- [Chad] You have to.
- [Anthony] I can't do it just like that!
- Show 'em.
- I can't even
- Do the thing you do, like this.
- I don't even know!
- He goes like this.
- He goes like
- But I have to have loud music.
- [Chad] Just do the thing! Come on, do it.
- [Anthony] Oh, my God. I can't do this.
No! Anthony!
[tense music plays]
[Chad] They see we're falling apart.
Like, you have to clear your mind
and learn to focus on one thing.
- [Anthony] Yeah, right. Impossible.
- Put yourself in that moment, you know?
You're holding on to so much,
filling with what you're mad about.
[Anthony] That's just recently
from all that happened.
What is happening?
That dance routine
felt like it was all Chad
and very little Anthony.
You have to make sure
you really hear your partner
and what they're comfortable with.
It's true in the bedroom,
and it's true by the pool.
OK. Here's the thing.
Twenty minutes is a really long time.
Only Beyoncé can dance for 20 minutes.
Even then I look at my phone for some.
I know it's a lot, but it's what I am.
I thought it told a story.
[Anthony] It's intimidating.
I don't know how to dance.
It's a lot for him to memorize
as someone who doesn't really dance.
There's already enough
to be stressed about on your wedding day.
You don't need to add, "Will I pull off
twerking around minute 13?"
- [Chad] That's a fear of mine, too.
- [Lee] It's a stress that you don't need.
Like, maybe ten minutes,
and I'll have a minute.
[bird tweeting]
Are we hearing what your partner's saying?
He wants one minute.
You guys have such good pure love.
I really mean that.
- [Chad] Thank you.
- [Lee] So, like, let that be the dance.
- I'm not anti-dance.
- [Chad] No, I hear you.
I want you guys
to want whatever you want.
I just don't want you to bite off
more than you can chew.
Yeah. Don't stress yourself out.
You got the rest of your life to do that.
These two are getting lost in the wrong
details in planning this wedding.
- Yeah.
- It's about performance, spectacle.
I'm really hoping
they pare the dance down.
Yeah, 'cause I would be
at the taco truck at minute four.
[scoffs] Uh, same.
- I would miss the entire thing.
- Like, "I get it."
- "Alright, time for some chilaquiles."
- Yeah, cute.
Now I have to go help Chad's mom
find something to wear for this wedding.
I mean, how to dress
for a wedding festival?
I don't think anyone really knows
what that dress code entails.
So we'll figure it out.
- [Chad] Look at you! [chuckles]
- Hi! I'm all zhuzhed.
- I know, you are zhuzhed.
- I'm kind of channeling Ariana right now.
- You actually really are. Show me a move.
- A little bit.
I feel like this store is great for moms
because even though you're saying
you want the moms
to be a little more formal,
you're still at a festival.
- Yeah.
- So I think it can be "desert formal."
- Which is a genre I just created.
- [woman] Hi.
- [Lee] Hi, Sheryl!
- [Chad] Hi!
- [Lee] It's so nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you, too.
How are you feeling about this wedding?
- Oh, yeah. OK.
- Your thoughts. I want the mom hard truth.
I'm feeling, you know, good about it,
but I do feel like it is way over the top.
I just want them to have a good time,
and I'm afraid they're so focused on,
you know, this big show and production
that they might get something lost
in the midst of it all, but
But you're gonna look fabulous.
You haven't bought anything yet
for the wedding.
- [Sheryl] I have not.
- Talk to me about where you're at.
Well, didn't you say
you wanted like tan or gold
We were talking, and I was pushing
a little more of a fancy thing on you.
She's like,
"Why not let mom feel comfortable?"
- I want you to wear what you enjoy.
- [Sheryl] That feels like me.
- [Chad] I like that idea.
- Yeah!
- Let's find you something to wear.
- OK.
Let's look around.
- So are we opposed to this?
- Yes, we are.
It just looks like a tent, though.
- [Chad] Just try it.
- I really hate it to be honest.
- Now I really want her to try it.
- OK, if she hates it
Watch, you're gonna put it on
- I feel like it's, "Uh!"
- Gosh! Are you kidding?
[laughs] When you go like that.
I think it's striking that balance
between wanting to up the ante
a little bit fashion-wise,
but also wanting to be supportive
and encouraging and build her up.
I mean, it's so not you,
but it's not horrible.
- [woman] I need to help you.
- OK, yes. See?
- I knew something had to be wrong.
- So, these two straps belong right here.
[Sheryl] Oh! OK!
You don't want to come with me, do you?
- [saleswoman] Yeah, I can help you.
- Thank you. That'd be great. Thanks.
- OK, there?
- [saleswoman] Yes, I think so.
[giggling]
There's a lot happening over here.
- [Sheryl] Oh, my goodness. Yes!
- [Chad chuckles]
[Lee] Are they having sex in there?
- "Oh, that's new." [laughs]
- "Yes. Oh! OK!"
[saleswoman] Just make sure
you put this one through the hole
- [Lee laughing]
- [Chad whispers] Is this really happening?
- [Lee] Oh, my God. [laughs]
- [Chad] Thank you. Let's see. And
- [Lee] Oh!
- [Chad] Oh!
- Oh, I like it better.
- Ooh, yeah, way better.
It's a nice, flattering style, so
- Let's try that black one.
- Yeah, let's try the black.
OK, it's obviously a little big.
- But I really like that on you.
- Wait a minute. Mom.
[Chad] No, are you kidding?
[Lee] It's just a little big,
but the shape is really cool.
Mom, yeah, actually,
you need to let loose.
It doesn't feel like me to me.
It's fun to see you in different things.
Yeah, I mean it is nice
to think outside of the box.
[Lee] Ooh!
- How do you feel?
- [Sheryl] Oh, I like it. I do.
I like this color a lot and,
um, the style and everything.
Yeah, I'm really happy.
- I mean, I don't know.
- [Sheryl] Oh, well, thank you.
What I love about your mom
is that she's so youthful and vibrant,
so you can't put her
in the typical mom box.
Yeah.
You have to make sure that the box
fits her, not the other way around.
Chad wants his mom
to wear the black and white floral,
but he has to realize
that people are gonna dress
based on their own style,
vanity, and body concerns.
I'm hoping Chad will just let go
of some of his control issues
and allow his mom to wear
whatever she feels good in.
I know. I guess I need to sit back
and count all my blessings.
- Yeah.
- It's crazy.
As I figure things out,
like the dance and stuff, it's true,
I'd rather just have an event
that people are happy being there.
That's the most important part.
People are gonna be happy
as long as you guys are happy.
- I know. It's just hard.
- Yeah.
Anthony seems like such a sweetheart,
and he seems to love you so much.
No, he does. I mean, we do. That's
But, obviously,
with just these last few months it's
it's becoming so disconnected.
It stinks. Like, it's yeah.
- I know.
- So I don't know.
It's obvious Chad
and Anthony love each other,
but it's also obvious that
they're pretty disconnected at this point.
You can't keep something like that inside.
No, and I don't think the strategy
is to force them to talk to each other,
like I'm some kind of couples counselor.
So I have an idea for how to approach it
with a little bit of levity.
Ah!
- [Chad laughs]
- [Punkie] Welcome, ladies and gentlemen!
We're gonna play a little game
called "The Nearlywed Game."
And now, if you all join in
in giving it up for your host, Jamie Lee.
- [they applaud]
- Punkie Johnson, everybody.
My Vanna White. Well, my Vanna Black.
- Here she is. [laughs]
- Hello.
- [laughs] I love it.
- Welcome to The Nearlywed Game.
- [Chad] Oh, man.
- I'm Jamie Lee.
I'm the perfect host
for The Nearlywed Game
as planning my wedding was so stressful,
I nearly didn't get married. [laughing]
[Chad laughing]
[Lee] Guys,
the rules of the game are simple.
I'll ask you a series of questions
about your relationship,
and you will write down your answers
on these dry erase boards.
- OK. Are you guys ready to play?
- Ready.
- [Punkie] I'm ready.
- I'm ready!
Let's do this. What is something
that Chad does that moves you?
[clock ticking]
OK, spin it around.
- [Punkie] I knew it.
- [Lee] "Sing joke"?
- [Anthony] Sing and joke.
- [Chad] Oh, it's true!
Oh, sing and joke. That's so sweet!
- [Lee] Aw!
- [Punkie] Aw!
[Lee] I'm feeling very optimistic. OK.
- Who is Chad's celebrity crush?
- [Punkie] Mm.
- [chuckles]
- Oh, my God.
- [Lee] What do you think you're putting?
- Wait, is this for real? OK.
[Lee] OK. One, two, three!
- [Punkie] Keller.
- [Lee] Who?
- [Chad] Oh, my God. I'm not a porn
- I don't know.
- I'm not a porn freak at all.
- Yes, you are.
- Is it a porn star?
- It's a porn star.
Colby Keller sounds like a folk artist
that would play on, like, the WB Network.
- [chuckles] He looks like that.
- [Lee] It sounds so innocent.
- Keller.
- Yeah, exactly. Oh, my gosh.
You did great in round one.
Round two is not gonna be so easy.
Alright, here we go.
Which word describes your
wedding planning experience right now?
- Joyful, meaningful, stressful, insane.
- [Chad sighs]
[clock ticking]
And reveal your answers.
"Insane." "Stressful."
I feel like stressful lands in insane.
Yeah, but they're
- I feel like insane covers it all.
- Yeah.
- But right now you feel insane?
- I do.
I feel like everything's kinda
out of control and we're You know?
- In the planning?
- Yeah. Don't you think?
- Hum No, I think stressful. [chuckles]
- Anthony, why stressful?
You know, we're realizing things
about each other
that we never would have seen
in another circumstance.
It's easy, the honeymoon phase is easy,
because you just block out all the bad
and just see the good,
but then when you have family
and friends and their influence
and their ideas of what it should be,
this and that, you know, it's stressful.
When I was getting married, hardest time
of my life, under constant stress.
- I think you felt that way.
- Mm-hmm.
I'm just trying to understand the root
of what's really going on with you guys.
[Chad] Um, it's hard to admit this,
but we are having some issues.
So I do live in fear,
and it causes insecurities.
But him, he wants to communicate it
all the time, all the time,
every day, every moment,
at 1:45 last night.
- [Chad] No.
- At 6:00 a.m.
So I'm like, "I just want to sleep."
He can forget negative things
and move on quick and be great.
I can't, I have to figure it out,
fix it, and then move on.
Right, but then when we do that,
more often than not,
it's almost like festering or spiraling.
It's a snowball effect.
Now there's more emotion
and then more anger. You know?
I don't understand why you can't just do
whatever it takes to make me feel safe.
I guess I feel that I don't want
to perpetuate an insecurity and feed it.
Honestly, your running
and your not talking about it
and the attitude
makes me feel resentment and hurt
and, like, "Oh, my gosh,
I'm right here, let's fix it."
Alright, guys.
Well, I love you. Punkie loves you.
- You know I love you.
- Relationships are really complicated.
Even if you get married,
they stay complicated.
So I think you guys have some things
to discuss, some things to figure out.
Communication and transparency.
- It's so important in a relationship.
- Yeah.
Especially when you're starting
to build a life together.
You don't want to start from a place of,
"We don't talk in an open and honest way."
You wanna start with like,
"Hey, here's how I'm feeling."
- "How are you feeling?"
- Yeah.
- "Here's how I am."
- [Lee chuckles]
"Here's how I am as a person.
Now I'm seeing who you are as a person."
You know, "Do we align?"
[upbeat music plays]
[Chad] I'm excited to see this.
- Do they have to charge?
- They take a couple of minutes to heat up.
- [Chad] Hello. [chuckles]
- [Lee] Hi!
[Chad] Just in time.
We're about to blow stuff up.
- No, don't do it!
- [they laugh]
- [Lee] What is this?
- [Chad] They're safe sparks.
- Is this gonna be like literal Fyre Fest?
- [Chad] Ready.
- No, it's
- Oh, literally! [laughs]
- [Chad] Is it one?
- We're gonna burn Uh, yeah.
- [Chad] Ready?
- No, I'm so scared.
You guys burst into flames.
- I'll be over here. [laughs]
- It's timed.
- [Anthony chuckles]
- [whirring]
- [Chad] Oh, look.
- [Lee screams]
Don't touch it! Don't do it!
- [Chad] Isn't that cool?
- No!
- It's cool. It's safe.
- Stop it!
So we're gonna come in
and be like [grunts]
- Duh, duh. Oh!
- [they laugh]
- We gotta work on the timing.
- [Chad] OK, yeah.
- OK, guys.
- [Chad] So, that's that.
Wow.
Chad and Anthony
are drowning in festival planning.
Listen to me, planning a wedding
is not building a marriage.
I know that Chad and Anthony
really love each other,
but it's clear
their relationship needs work.
So I think it's safe to say
The Nearlywed Game got a little intense.
I just wanted to come and check up on you,
see how you're doing.
Um. [sighs]
- That was a deep sigh.
- [Chad] I know.
I mean, no, we're good.
At least we think we're good.
I think it's just hard. I think [sighs]
- [somber music plays]
- [Chad sobbing]
[Lee] Chad!
[continues sobbing]
I just don't feel like it's
I don't know.
Just think the festival's
taking over everything.
- [Lee] Yeah.
- [continues sobbing]
Well, I feel for the two of you
because I think it's very relatable
what you're going through.
My husband and I
barely made it to the altar.
I mean, we were suffering.
I didn't know we were capable
of arguing to that degree
during our wedding planning
- Did that scare you?
- Yes, 100%.
People kind of
kick the term "stress" around
in this sort of like fun, frivolous way.
- It's not funny.
- No one gets it.
People can get sick from stress.
Physically,
you can make yourself really sick.
This is why
I don't like the term, "Big Day."
I think it diminishes
other great days in your life.
Marriage. Sure. All about marriage.
I think marriage is solid.
But I think that marriage
is a less crazy concept to me
than planning a wedding.
- Yeah. Definitely.
- [Lee] Yeah.
- That's good advice.
- [Chad sighs]
- [knocking on door]
- [Lee] Hello?
- [Chad] Hello?
- [Lee] Hi!
- Tony?
- [Chad] Hi. Come on in.
- Yeah. Welcome. Have a seat.
- [Anthony chuckles]
- Um, how are you guys doing?
- We're good. [sighs]
- [Lee] Yeah?
- Just, you know, a lot.
Where are you at right now?
Um
Where are we at? [chuckles]
We've We've really talked
about a lot of things,
but I think we both decided that,
you know, it just
just doesn't seem right or feasible
to push on with the wedding.
So as crazy as that is
- OK.
- [Anthony] I know.
We've had some issues
obviously between us,
and we're thinking that that might be
something that if we do away with that,
then maybe it'll save us,
and obviously that's worth it.
He's opened up a lot recently
about the stress and what he feels,
things he's never really
said to me before.
It's scary because these things come up
and you're like, "Oh, my gosh.
We can't quit a wedding."
"The guests, the money,
the people, the things."
Then as you talk more you go,
"Wait a minute, none of it matters.
What are we running from?"
- We're right here.
- You know what?
In my mind, the way I'm thinking is like
I don't feel like y'all calling it off.
- I just feel it's more of a postponing
- [Lee] Mm-hmm. A pause.
You're allowed to take a moment
and be a little bummed
about calling off a wedding.
Yeah. So how do we cancel this thing?
I actually think
canceling a wedding is very simple.
[Punkie] Mm-hmm.
The emotions attached to it
are not gonna be simple.
You guys have to make space for that.
That's what you'll deal with as a couple.
Do you think an explanation is due
of kind of where we're at?
So they don't wonder
"We're still together, still love
each other, not going anywhere."
We're not canceling the relationship,
but we are canceling the wedding.
Canceling your wedding
feels huge and embarrassing,
but in reality,
nobody is surprised by anything anymore.
You do not owe anyone
an explanation for your life choices.
What about a commitment event
and celebrate our love with everyone,
and then when we're ready,
no matter how far away it is,
- we can go and sign the paper.
- Or how many people.
- Yes.
- [Chad] So
Then people get to see us and they go,
"Hey, you know what? They're good."
So instead of having a big wedding,
we're gonna celebrate us being together
and we're gonna throw a huge party,
have our same friends and family there.
Less stress, less pressure to perform.
It's just come enjoy us.
Let's be all together and yeah.
- What it should have been.
- Yeah.
We've stopped the wedding,
but saved our relationship.
It's actually a super blessing.
Yeah, I feel better.
- I'm so glad.
- [Chad] I'm thankful.
- Everything happens for a reason.
- The weight that came off my shoulders.
It's very scary to call off this festival,
and I think that it took
an extra level of bravery
for them to be like, "We just need
to focus on our relationship
and let everything else fall away
for the time being."
Plus, like, a zero pressure wedding?
- Oh, hell yeah.
- [scoffs] It's a dream. That is the dream.
And now I'm pissed and jealous.
[laughing]
[upbeat music playing]
[Lee] Oh, my God. I'm so excited.
- Hi!
- How are you?
Oh, my God!
- [Punkie] I love your hair to the front.
- Happy day!
- Happy day, I know.
- Happy day!
- [Anthony] I got a job for you.
- [gasps] Give it to me.
OK, so you're gonna screw
each of these down to these posts.
[Lee] OK.
- [Punkie] We gotta get this done right.
- [Lee] Yeah!
Chad and Anthony made a mature choice
to pump the brakes
and prioritize their relationship
right now.
We did it!
I don't want them to worry about
next steps or what the future holds.
I want them to simply enjoy each other
after all they've been through.
[funky guitar music playing]
- [Sheryl] Hi, Jamie.
- Sheryl! Look at you!
Hi. How are you?
- Oh, my goodness!
- Hi.
- OK, you look positively radiant.
- Thank you.
- You're wearing the dress we picked out!
- Yes.
- And you're wearing matching earrings!
- Yeah, and a bracelet.
- Oh, my goodness! You look great.
- Thank you.
- How do you feel about this event?
- I'm fine with it.
I'm just glad they're together,
and we're all gonna be a family one day.
Chad, I know,
has really been working on himself,
and just trying to,
you know, do a little inventory.
So good things have happened
in that respect.
So that's all I can ask for.
- [party music playing]
- [indistinct chatter]
- Hi.
- Hi.
- How are you?
- I'm good.
- [Lee] Are you good?
- I'm good!
- Yeah? How are you feeling?
- Yeah.
I just feel like
I just want to get this part over with.
- But in a good way.
- What part?
Well, I mean, we have to like now address
obviously all of our people,
and, you know,
everything we've gone through.
- So I just want it to be good.
- Hey. Look at me.
All these people here
are like obsessed with you.
- They adore you.
- [Punkie] Big time.
You're around people
who are like already team Chanthony.
They know you.
You don't have to posture.
- You know what I mean?
- Yeah.
OK. Here we go. Come on.
- Hey, guys!
- Hi, everyone!
- [Lee] Hi, everybody! How are you?
- [guests cheering]
I'm feeling so emotional,
but luckily there's three dessert options
for me to eat my feelings, so
Please don't fall in the pool, ma'am.
You're very close to the edge.
OK, guys, without further ado,
I'm gonna bring up
the reason we are all here.
Clap it up for the fabulous,
the gorgeous
Chanthony!
- [guests cheer]
- Meow, meow!
- What's up, handsomes?
- [Chad] Hello.
- Hi, ladies. Aw.
- [guest laughing]
Well, we're here.
[guests cheering]
A lot of you have been so supportive
and loving, and I appreciate everything.
[woman] We love you!
- [Chad] Love you guys so much. Thank you.
- [cheering]
- Woo! Chad!
- [man] We love you.
I know we have such an amazing thing,
and you are my soulmate,
like I would do anything
and everything for you.
When we get married, and we will,
and we'll be together forever,
it'll be deserved.
[cheering]
I'm not going to say it as well as he did,
but I love you all so much.
- And I love this man so much.
- [cheering]
And thank you
for taking this journey with us.
[guests cheering]
I feel like after this whole process,
we are in a totally new,
healthier direction,
a new chapter in our lives.
It's pretty ironic that we, uh,
asked Jamie to come and help us,
you know, with the wedding festival
and help us put it together,
and she ended up
helping our relationship.
So we're actually
gonna do a small ritual.
Are you guys on board for that?
- [cheers]
- [Lee] OK.
We're gonna do a lantern ceremony.
We have these lanterns,
and you're gonna write something
from the past that you want to let go of,
and you're gonna set it free,
because tonight is all about
living in the moment
and looking forward
towards the future.
- Are you guys into that?
- [cheers]
Honestly, we never even needed
all the flashy stuff we were doing.
We do have a really good love.
We have a great connection.
Having a third party like Jamie coming in,
we took full advantage
of her straightforward comedic energy
and instead of putting that energy
into the wedding,
it became about us, which we needed.
We didn't even really know we needed it.
And it helped a lot.
[uplifting music playing]
What did you write on your lantern?
I put my wife's name down.
I got to get rid of this bitch.
I put the dog's name.
You want to get rid of the dog
and the house?
- I can't handle it no more.
- [laughs]
I just want to be by myself,
just for a little while.
- Wanna see what I put?
- Yeah.
"That time I got baby bangs
and ended up looking like Post Malone."
- Cheers, man, I love ya.
- [Punkie] Cheers. I love you, too.
[Lee over microphone] Five, four, three
- Two, one!
- [Punkie] One!
Release!
[guests cheering]
[dance music playing]
Tonight think of me as DJ Panda Postponed.
[guests cheer]
Because we're saying,
"Bam-boo to Big Bridal!"
[guests cheer]
This whole thing,
it didn't turn out as we expected,
but not everything is gonna be wrapped up
in a big fluffy pink bow.
[Punkie] They went through their trial,
their tribulation, they came out on top.
- I'm just like, "Fuck, yes."
- Same.
[all shouting]
- [Chad] Thank you guys so much.
- [Lee] We love you!
This honestly
is making me want a Popsicle.
- For real?
- Do you think it tastes good?
- You know, I don't know what this is.
- It tastes like foam.
- [sighs] What if you bite it this way?
- But
- No. Still gross. Still gross.
- Yeah, tear it up.
[upbeat music plays]