Undead Murder Farce (2023) s01e05 Episode Script

1
Good morning, Erik.
How are you feeling, Erik?
How do you know my real name?
Oh, I know lots of things.
You're from Persia. You were born with
your white hair and disfigured face.
Your singing voice is an unparalleled tenor.
You live 23 floors beneath the Paris Opera.
The nickname you were given
was the Phantom of the Opera.
What is this place?
L'Aiguille Creuse Though I'm
still working on it.
Why did you kidnap me?
I stole you along with this ruby.
I can't bear to see this passionate jewel
never be more than some stage prop.
And it's no fun to have a true phantom
living in obscurity beneath an opera house.
They should both belong to me.
Enough chatter. What are you after?
There's a job I'd like to do in London.
But my assistant ran away on me
so I needed another one.
What are you planning on stealing?
The Penultimate Night.
From Phileas Fogg's mansion? Are you mad?!
That mansion's security is impregnable.
And in London, there's Sherlock Holmes.
And on the continent, there's me.
Arsène Lupin.
Do we even stand a chance?
I wouldn't have invited you here if we didn't.
So, what are you going to do? Go home?
I was stolen, wasn't I?
I'll follow my owner's orders.
The
Immortal
of
London
Episode
Five
Arsène Lupin, a famous
gentleman thief from France
A.D.
London, England
His letter of warning arrived at
Phileas Fogg's mansion.
Have a great day.
The phantom thief, Lupin,
is going to appear in London!
Famous detectives all around the world
are seeking to be the ones
hired to foil Lupin.
I'll bet the Cage User and crew will be, too!
Would you like to place an order?
Yes. Oh, but it's not for me.
It's actually for my master.
I see.
Well How tall are they?
Hm About three apples high?
Tsu-ga-ru
The lists of his clients are stored in
alphabetical order in those drawers.
Pardon, but who exactly are you talking to?
There had to be a smoother way to do that.
We're just borrowing it for a couple days.
The list should contain—
Can I help you?
It's quite a simple matter, really.
I'd like you to return the client list
you took from Horne's shop.
Would you be from Scotland Yard, then?
No, no. They are nowhere
near as talented as I am.
Shizuku, could you take care
of the master for a bit?
I don't think they're just
going to hand it over.
It appears that you're no common thieves.
It's been a while
Oh?
Whoopsie. Well, there's trouble.
Hey, we're innocent.
Right?
Yeah.
Get Inspector Lestrade!
He'll be able to vouch—
Every citizen in London knows
Inspector Lestrade's name.
All this because you wanted
to buy a new walking stick
You're plenty suspicious for
being around this thing.
I had heard that English
gentlemen were kind to women.
Calling me "this thing" is rather rude.
Eek! It's talking!
You there. You twins.
You were just wailing about the fact
that you're innocent, but you're lying.
You were clearly holding
onto a bag stuffed full
right until the point you were caught.
H-How would you know that?
The joints of your fingers are quite red.
That doesn't happen unless you've been
holding a heavy bag for quite some time.
What exactly were you transporting?
Money? Drugs?
Contraband. Ceramic art.
How can you tell?
They both have sawdust under their nails.
It could have been glass.
One wouldn't put something
that fragile in a bag.
How about it, chaps?
It's pottery, isn't it?
Wow, he got it right!
It was a pot from the East.
Don't tell him that, you idiot!
Cut the yapping.
The talking severed head of a girl
She's clearly undead.
I've read that there was a sole
immortal monster in Japan.
We'd be rich if we sold her to the circus.
Hey. You.
Lupin's letter of warning has already
been taken up by the papers.
It says he's after Strong Man
Fogg's precious jewel.
And Fogg hired two detectives for the job!
One is Sherlock Holmes, of course.
Honestly
Who's the other one?
Um I think the name was Aya.
A detective from Japan?
"The Doghouse User" or something.
It's a pleasure to meet you.
My name is Sherlock Holmes.
This is my dear friend, Watson.
Aya Rindo. As you can see, I live
in a bird cage, not a doghouse.
Now, then. There's no point
in wasting any more time here.
Hey! We're changing up our destination!
You're early, Mister Illusionist.
I'm not an illusionist. I'm a magician.
Same difference.
They are quite different, thank you.
Professor
About thirty years ago, Phileas Fogg
did the unthinkable,
traveling around the world in eighty
days with his butler, Passepartout.
The Fogg mansion, with its
neoclassical architecture
Scotland Yard! Clear the way!
Open the gates!
Why a prisoner transport?
Who's in there?!
Oh!
Sherlock Holmes!
And Doctor Watson!
The Cage User and Miss Aya Rindo!
I can't see.
Welcome, everyone, to Master Fogg's mansion.
I am the butler, Passepartout.
I'm Inspector Lestrade.
Is that bridge the only way in and out?
Indeed.
Lessee, this direction is
This is the north building.
The east and west buildings to
our left and right are both museums.
Master Fogg purchased this mansion
to display the items he collected
on his trip around the world.
Seems like a sturdy build.
How in the world does Lupin
plan on getting in here?
Hey, Erik.
Lupin. What are you doing?
My after-meal exercises.
I went to check on Fogg's mansion.
As of this morning,
they've closed it to the public,
and increased security.
What about Holmes?
He's there. And there was another group.
A detective called the Cage User.
A woman, they say.
A woman, eh? I'm looking forward to that.
It's all because of that warning you sent.
Why did you send such a thing?
I am a gentleman, after all.
Mister Phileas Fogg.
I apologize for summoning
all of you so suddenly.
Mister Sherlock Holmes, Doctor Watson,
and the Cage User
Tsugaru Shinuchi and
Aya Rindo.
I see. You indeed seem like detectives
who specialize in monsters.
Which also means that we
may not be of much use here.
I believe that Arsène Lupin is
as threatening as a monster.
I've also heard that he's gained the
aid of the Phantom of the Opera.
You've made the right choice, but perhaps
hiring two detectives was too much.
Indeed. I can handle this case all by myself.
I wonder how useful a
literal talking head could be
The funny thing is that you only
need a brain to do detective work.
Holmes, let's hear about the incident.
"Dear Mister Phileas Fogg.
From 11 PM to 11:30 PM on January 19th,
I will be taking the Penultimate
Night that's in your possession,
along with the safe that holds it.
Sincerely, Arsène Lupin."
Why on Earth is it "from 11 PM to
11:30 PM"? I would just say 11:30.
By the way, what is this Penultimate Night?
It is an 80-carat black diamond.
Because of its rarity,
we do not have it on display.
It is kept safe in a special
room in the basement.
This mansion has a moat.
There must be other waterways here.
There is one on the south side.
A canal five feet underground
that connects with the River Thames.
How wide is it?
It is wide enough for
an adult to get through.
Then I'd like for you to close it off.
As you wish.
To protect the diamond,
you have 20 security personnel,
eighty officers from Scotland Yard,
Watson and myself, the three
members of the Cage User group,
Inspector Lestrade, yourself, and Master Fogg,
for a grand total of 108 people.
That number means trouble. How unlucky.
Why don't you add or subtract some?
Apparently, Inspector Ganimard will be
arriving here tomorrow morning from France.
There will also be two others.
Royce is sending two agents from
their advisory security department.
Royce
Well, that's going to be trouble.
They're just an insurance
company, aren't they?
They happen to be a giant
insurance organization
that's been around for 200 years.
When a monster appears or a
coup d'état erupts near their clients
they are professionals who will protect
their clients with everything they have.
What are they like?
They have seven members.
They are numbered in order of ability.
Their ages and nationalities all vary.
Their Number 6, who chased me, was Asian.
So they have nothing in common?
Three things
They all wear white.
Second, they all have ridiculous codenames.
What's the last one?
They're all insanely strong.
Royce Advisory Security Department
Agent Number 5, Reynold Stingheart.
I'm Phileas Fogg.
No need for a handshake.
It would dirty my glove.
I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry!
I'm Agent Number 7, Fatima Doubledarts.
I'm sorry that my partner is so rude!
I'll shake your hand for the both of us!
Are they circus performers or something?
I didn't have that sort of
trouble on my schedule.
You'd better put it on there.
Those are the sorts we're dealing with.
An immortal and an Oni Hybrid.
Monsters who have blended into human society.
How disgusting.
Now, then I shall take
you all to see the diamond.
Something tells me they're
no ordinary insurance agency.
The biggest hindrance in
the insurance business
is illogical creatures like ourselves.
They're basically fanatical
monster exterminators.
Th-The basement, eh?
I've just remembered something
I have to do. I'm leaving.
Y-You can't! We need to go down.
This mansion originally belonged
to the Temple Church.
Though I've made quite a few renovations,
I haven't really touched the basement.
It's currently where I keep the diamond.
I have no idea what it
was originally used for.
It's enormous.
I call this the reception room. And
This is where I keep the diamond.
The Chamber of Additional Crimes.
This is
the Chamber of Additional Crimes.
I'd rather not try to imagine what
happened here in the past.
So that's the diamond?
This is the Penultimate Night.
Fantastic. It's no wonder Lupin's
after such a treasure.
Well, it's not a natural diamond.
I don't think synthetic diamonds
are worth as much, are they?
But I see that the safe is pure silver.
That's the metal that vampires
and werewolves despise.
Mister Fogg, could you kindly explain
the history of that diamond to us?
I obtained it twenty years ago.
My friend from Germany unearthed
it from a fourteenth-century ruin,
and gave it to me, along with the safe.
The fourteenth century?
Preposterous.
I became rather curious about what was inside,
so I devoted myself to figuring out how to
open the complicated contraption.
It became my obsession.
And finally, ten years later
Inside it was this gem.
According to an expert, it has
a very rare composition.
Along with carbon, there are
also traces of europium.
Then there's this text
Tsugaru.
"The dawn is red as blood.
The sunset is purple as a corpse.
Do not gaze upon my hideous self
as the moon shines down on me,
for there is a wolf inside of me."
Passepartout and I both researched
the origins of this diamond,
and what we found was
It's called the Penultimate Night.
It's said that the dwarves
that once lived in Germany
were exterminated by a
certain tribe of werewolves.
The desperate dwarves swore
revenge and, in order to tell
future generations the
location of their enemy,
they created two pieces with their
characteristic refinement techniques.
A jewel that would never shatter
and a safe made of the pure silver
that their enemies hated so much.
I see.
I can see why Lupin is so
interested in this now.
This item is one of a kind.
I will do everything I can to protect it.
Victor, if the paper is around,
could you hand it to me?
It's all talk about Lupin.
The Penultimate Night, eh?
How annoying. That little thief keeps
going after the things I want.
What shall we do?
Well, I must go say hello to an old friend.
Is something the matter?
It appears another old friend
is here from the East.
This steel door requires the
strength of four men to open.
The locks are three detector
locks I specially ordered.
Each one has a different key.
That speaking tube is the only way
to communicate with the outside.
I see. So this is almost perfect.
Almost, you say?
If I were Lupin, I would look for every
possible way to infiltrate this place.
For example digging a tunnel.
It's impossible to dig
to such depths unnoticed.
What's that?
A vent. We would suffocate
in here without it.
Couldn't that serve as a way in, then?
Quite impossible.
The vent is so small that a child
might just barely pass through it.
It's also bent in various ways to keep
infiltrators out, and closed off with a grate.
Then let's consider the fact that
Lupin is a master of disguise.
If Lupin just happened
to be in here with us
Well, we can call it a day for now.
Let's go, Watson. We must stop by the
walking stick shop on our way home.
Ah, that's right.
Do you think it's real?
There's no doubt about it.
We'll do everything according to plan.
Don't mess this up.
I'll see you all tomorrow night.
Yes.
What is it?
It's trivial. Don't worry about it.
Master, do you have a way
of dealing with Lupin?
I've thought of one, but it's so idiotic
that I'm not sure if it'll work.
I see. So what's the plan?
Your hint is
Goemon Ishikawa.