Welcome to Wrexham (2022) s01e05 Episode Script
Fearless
1
[insects trilling]
[Declan Swans'
"Always Sunny in Wrexham"]
[coughs]
[drum beats]
SCOOT: Yeah, whatever.
I met up with Scoot there.
I think we went into a pub.
Not underground,
no, nobody has ever.
[twangy guitar music]
[singing] He ordered
a medium donner kebab
DECLAN SWANS
[singing] Crumbling down
No one's invested so much
DECLAN SWANS: [singing]
And Rob McElhenney
Less than a mile
from the center of town
Our famous old stadium's
crumbling down
[Buddy Holly's "Everyday"]
BUDDY: [singing] Every day,
it's a-getting closer
Going faster
than a roller coaster
Love like yours will
surely come my way
A-hey, a-hey-hey
Every day,
it's a-getting faster
Everyone said,
"Go ahead and ask her"
Love like yours will
surely come my way
A-hey, a-hey-hey
Love like yours will
surely come my way
McELHENNEY:
Our first full season
as Wrexham owners has begun,
yet many people still
don't know where Wales is.
That's right, Rob.
So we're here
with a little geography lesson.
Now, many people think that
Wales is in England.
It is not, Ryan.
[buzzer blares]
It's in a region known as,
Rest of World.
[bell dings]
If you're planning
on visiting Rest of World,
please consider visiting Wrexham.
It's a proud team honor
to be in FIFA 22.
Even if it is in
Rest of World.
Right?
What the fuck is Rest of World?
It's not even a
CREW MEMBER: Nailed it.
- Yeah, it was good.
[giggles]
CREW MEMBER: Okay.
[soft melancholic music]
I think us being successful
this year is critical.
Now, does that mean
that we have to win the league
by Christmas?
No, of course not.
This game against Chesterfield
is a big test for us.
They're a top team.
It's really hard to win
in this league.
It's really hard to get out
of this league.
But I think we have to be
up there in the top, you know,
two or three teams.
I think anything below that
would be a massive failure.
[indistinct chatter]
FAN: Miss lady.
ANNETTE: Hello!
Hello!
FAN: Good morning.
ANNETTE: Good morning.
How can I help?
FAN: How are you?
ANNETTE: I'm fine, thank you.
FAN: Oh, right.
Well, I've got my
ANNETTE:
Sorry to keep you waiting.
[indistinct chatter]
I went to my first game at 15
purely because I was taken
by a lad from school.
Nobody in my family
liked football at all,
and I think I went first time
for spite, if I'm honest.
[laughs]
From that day, I was hooked.
[sentimental music]
So this is my seat, J131.
I sit with my friend Jen
and Janet and Sheila.
We're known as the Dragons.
We're always here
with our pie chips and gravy
before the game,
having somewhere
to put them down
when expecting a goal.
[cheers and applause]
And I've spilt my tea
quite a number of times
down onto Clive,
who sits down here.
My husband died
ten years this year.
He just had a heart attack
at his desk at work
and didn't come home.
My children were 14 and 12.
[announcer
speaking indistinctly]
SAM: I'm a Wrexham superfan.
Every bit of my spare time,
I'm playing FIFA
with a full Wrexham squad.
Massive fan of their club.
Every match that I can get to,
I go to.
If it's at home,
after the matches,
I normally go to meet
the players at the back
where they come out.
I got Reckord's signing,
Dibble's signing.
I also writ this sign saying,
"Paul Mullin,
can I have your shirt?"
Didn't succeed, but oh, well.
[soft music]
I went to a Wrexham game
when I was about eight.
That was my first ever game.
That's perfect.
And I saw
how the goalies were
the feeling that I felt
when they made a good save,
I wanted to be
in that feeling.
When you score a goal,
it was a good feeling,
but not as good
as saving a ball.
Mm, if we keep on trying, yeah.
[Sam kisses]
[soft music]
LEE: How many?
[players shouting indistinctly]
PLAYER: Stop lying!
PLAYER: No, I promise you.
[player laughs]
PLAYER: I promise ya.
I swear it down.
PLAYER: Oh.
Left!
Left!
PLAYER: Oh. [laughs]
He's got
Right!
PLAYER:
What you doing now, Rob?
[laughter]
PLAYER: I'm right.
LEE: Yes, Rob.
Just drop in that goal
for us, please.
PHIL: As much as strikers
will produce big moments,
it's important goalkeepers
have got that ability.
Your goalkeeper's
gotta be one you feel
can produce
a match-winning save.
PLAYER: Yes, Lainton. Oh.
LEE: Nice one, Rob.
Itit's tough.
It can be tough, you know?
Ityou know,
I've had it before,
I've made a mistake
and I don't sleep at night.
LEE: I know
what they're going through.
I know what it's like
to make a mistake
in the first two or three
minutes of a game,
and then you've gotta play
the next 83, 85 minutes,
you know, and-and put
that mistake out of your head,
which is easier said
than done.
[soft music]
[mallet clinking]
[dramatic music]
ANNOUNCER:
Horrible collision.
ANNOUNCER:
That doesn't look too good.
ANNOUNCER: No.
ANNOUNCER: Lainton stays down.
And this could be bad news
for Wrexham.
Rob Lainton is down
and not moving.
[high-pitched ringing]
[staggered breathing]
[muffled chatter]
DECLAN SWANS: [singing]
Invested so much as a penny
Bring on the Deadpool
and Rob McElhenney
MARK: You all right?
WENDY:
Right.
What's the next dates
of the gigs?
Swan's Gate, I think.
Yeah.
I've got two treatments to go.
I got tomorrow,
and then hopefully I finish
on November the 3rd.
Erm, and fingers crossed
that'll be it.
[both laugh]
- [Scoot clears throat]
- [laughs]
[upbeat percussive music]
[players talking indistinctly]
Yeah.
PERSON: Is it?
No.
PERSON:
But if you
PERSON: Press it.
It's sore if you squeeze it.
Rhino
is that what it's called?
Women go and get it and, like
- Rhinoplasty.
Rhinoplasty.
What did I call it?
Rhino-ostrophy?
PERSON: [laughing] Rhino
[lively music]
TICKET PERSON: Hello.
Charlie, get your tickets.
Oh, yeah, here I come.
[cheers and applause]
[chanting]
[tense music]
PHIL: Make sure we win
that battle tonight.
We're aggressive,
we're front-foot,
we're positive,
but we're in control.
Enjoy the night.
Go and get these fans
out of their seats,
fuckin' behind ya.
PLAYER: Come on!
PLAYER: Come on, let's go!
PLAYER: Come on,
let's fucking go.
CROWD: Wrexham, Wrexham,
Wrexham, Wrexham!
[whistle blows]
ANNOUNCER: Lainton launches
it long, Mullin chasing.
He's beaten to it, though,
and it's flicked back.
[cheers and applause]
You're early!
ANNOUNCER:
Tozer does well in the end.
The ball hits Rowe's hand.
He's offsides!
ANNOUNCER: Tshimanga
looks well offsides!
But the flanks is down.
He's cutting in!
Tight angle,
and Lainton saves well.
Ball's through the eight.
PERSON: Is he not offsides?
PERSON: No.
All right,
keep us going, son!
ANNOUNCER: I think
Chesterfield are probably
winning the physical battle.
ANNOUNCER: Free kick.
ANNOUNCER: Chesterfield ready
to make a run.
ANNOUNCER:
Watch the two round the back.
Watch the two round the back
in the block.
ANNOUNCER:
Swept to the far post,
free header, and across
to face a goal!
Chesterfield take the lead.
And there you go.
That's why you have
to be alert.
MARK: Wrexham have not
defended well.
Shock for Wrexham.
Chesterfield are playing well.
And as the game's progressing,
increasingly so, we're not.
ANNOUNCER: Ooh, Oldaker
makes a great tackle.
FAN: Hey!
BOTH: Fuck off!
FAN:
It's our free kick! Ay!
It's our free kick!
[suspenseful music]
ANNOUNCER: He's lost it
and he's turned by Kellermann
Who puts another nice-looking
ball towards Tshimanga.
It's a penalty.
It's gotta be, isn't it?
ANNOUNCER: Yeah.
[whistle blows]
ANNOUNCER:
And Wrexham are in trouble.
[tense music]
I think he's gonna give
Tshimanga the go-ahead.
The Wrexham fans threaten
to put him off.
[cheers and applause]
ANNOUNCER:
Saved.
Big save by Lainton.
FAN: Fucking come on!
[dramatic music]
We played the whole
of the 38 minutes in that half.
Our own half,
that's where we played.
We're not gonna win the game,
are we?
We're not gonna win the game.
We've had a fucking lifeline
it was the penalty save.
We've been given a lifeline.
Grasp it with both hands.
[dramatic music]
[indistinct chatter]
SCOOT: Before cancer,
I've never been in hospital.
I've never given blood.
On the day of chemotherapy,
you get weighed,
they give you
what's called a "flush" first
and then theythey actually
give you the chemo,
so you're sitting there
with your arm up.
Then you've got this, erm,
big bag next to you
of the stuff
that you're pumping into you.
You basically keep watching
the bag and just waiting
for it to just go down
and down and down and down,
and you're looking
at your clock all the time.
I had this, like, painkiller
into me
going into me back to keep me
so I was spaced out
a lot of the time as well.
And yeah.
[emotional music]
Schoolboy memories.
You know, I was thinking
about me dad.
We do a lot together.
I mean, she watches Wrexham
as well.
Football was a big part
of me thoughts, but
[cheers and applause]
[soulful instrumental music]
CROWD:
Wrexham!
ANNOUNCER: Tozer slings
towardsand Lee head balls.
And it's in!
[cheers and applause]
Come on! Come on!
ANNOUNCER: Out of nowhere,
Wrexham gets the equalizer!
Free header, Mullin!
Last thing at home.
DOCTOR: Wow.
[cheers and applause]
DOCTOR: Well done.
NURSE: Yay!
SCOOT:
Thank you very much.
REPORTER: Well, we're now
nine games into the season
and still miles away
in 12th place,
but after a poor first half,
you have to be encouraged
by how Wrexham responded
in that second half
against a true rival
for promotion.
Promising signs,
and it's the first trial
we seem to have emerged from
looking stronger.
Hopefully Phil can keep
this side going like this
and we can see
continued improvement now.
[sentimental music]
- Eh?
- Lainton.
I'm not too sure
'cause I've been
in the physio room, so he
he won't be too long.
Hop in.
Yeah, disappointed
when they awarded the penalty.
Uh, but Rob's a good goalkeeper
and, um, you know,
it was a big moment for us.
Let's enjoy the day.
Not just make the most of it,
you know.
What can we achieve today
for the team?
Because people remember being
at games with their kids
and watching, you know,
great moments,
and they live
live in their memories as much
as the people that are
actually involved in them,
out on the pitch
or on the touchline.
Let's try and string
a couple of wins together
and we'll be back up there.
ALL:
Iechyd da.
ANNETTE:
Football for me is far more
than the actual game
of football.
It's being here
with your football family.
It'sit's the whole
match day experience.
Go, baby, go.
BOTH:
Ooh.
McELHENNEY: I don't remember
any specific game.
I just remember
the bonding experience
between you and the people
who have been following
this adventure.
BOTH: Goal!
- Goal, goal, goal, goal.
Goal, goal, goal,
goal, goal, goal,
SAM: Yeah.
LAINTON: Well done, lad.
SAM: Cheers.
LAINTON: See you later.
CODY: Thank you.
SAM: Good game. See ya.
See ya next week.
[child giggles, seagull cries]
[insects trilling]
[Declan Swans'
"Always Sunny in Wrexham"]
[coughs]
[drum beats]
SCOOT: Yeah, whatever.
I met up with Scoot there.
I think we went into a pub.
Not underground,
no, nobody has ever.
[twangy guitar music]
[singing] He ordered
a medium donner kebab
DECLAN SWANS
[singing] Crumbling down
No one's invested so much
DECLAN SWANS: [singing]
And Rob McElhenney
Less than a mile
from the center of town
Our famous old stadium's
crumbling down
[Buddy Holly's "Everyday"]
BUDDY: [singing] Every day,
it's a-getting closer
Going faster
than a roller coaster
Love like yours will
surely come my way
A-hey, a-hey-hey
Every day,
it's a-getting faster
Everyone said,
"Go ahead and ask her"
Love like yours will
surely come my way
A-hey, a-hey-hey
Love like yours will
surely come my way
McELHENNEY:
Our first full season
as Wrexham owners has begun,
yet many people still
don't know where Wales is.
That's right, Rob.
So we're here
with a little geography lesson.
Now, many people think that
Wales is in England.
It is not, Ryan.
[buzzer blares]
It's in a region known as,
Rest of World.
[bell dings]
If you're planning
on visiting Rest of World,
please consider visiting Wrexham.
It's a proud team honor
to be in FIFA 22.
Even if it is in
Rest of World.
Right?
What the fuck is Rest of World?
It's not even a
CREW MEMBER: Nailed it.
- Yeah, it was good.
[giggles]
CREW MEMBER: Okay.
[soft melancholic music]
I think us being successful
this year is critical.
Now, does that mean
that we have to win the league
by Christmas?
No, of course not.
This game against Chesterfield
is a big test for us.
They're a top team.
It's really hard to win
in this league.
It's really hard to get out
of this league.
But I think we have to be
up there in the top, you know,
two or three teams.
I think anything below that
would be a massive failure.
[indistinct chatter]
FAN: Miss lady.
ANNETTE: Hello!
Hello!
FAN: Good morning.
ANNETTE: Good morning.
How can I help?
FAN: How are you?
ANNETTE: I'm fine, thank you.
FAN: Oh, right.
Well, I've got my
ANNETTE:
Sorry to keep you waiting.
[indistinct chatter]
I went to my first game at 15
purely because I was taken
by a lad from school.
Nobody in my family
liked football at all,
and I think I went first time
for spite, if I'm honest.
[laughs]
From that day, I was hooked.
[sentimental music]
So this is my seat, J131.
I sit with my friend Jen
and Janet and Sheila.
We're known as the Dragons.
We're always here
with our pie chips and gravy
before the game,
having somewhere
to put them down
when expecting a goal.
[cheers and applause]
And I've spilt my tea
quite a number of times
down onto Clive,
who sits down here.
My husband died
ten years this year.
He just had a heart attack
at his desk at work
and didn't come home.
My children were 14 and 12.
[announcer
speaking indistinctly]
SAM: I'm a Wrexham superfan.
Every bit of my spare time,
I'm playing FIFA
with a full Wrexham squad.
Massive fan of their club.
Every match that I can get to,
I go to.
If it's at home,
after the matches,
I normally go to meet
the players at the back
where they come out.
I got Reckord's signing,
Dibble's signing.
I also writ this sign saying,
"Paul Mullin,
can I have your shirt?"
Didn't succeed, but oh, well.
[soft music]
I went to a Wrexham game
when I was about eight.
That was my first ever game.
That's perfect.
And I saw
how the goalies were
the feeling that I felt
when they made a good save,
I wanted to be
in that feeling.
When you score a goal,
it was a good feeling,
but not as good
as saving a ball.
Mm, if we keep on trying, yeah.
[Sam kisses]
[soft music]
LEE: How many?
[players shouting indistinctly]
PLAYER: Stop lying!
PLAYER: No, I promise you.
[player laughs]
PLAYER: I promise ya.
I swear it down.
PLAYER: Oh.
Left!
Left!
PLAYER: Oh. [laughs]
He's got
Right!
PLAYER:
What you doing now, Rob?
[laughter]
PLAYER: I'm right.
LEE: Yes, Rob.
Just drop in that goal
for us, please.
PHIL: As much as strikers
will produce big moments,
it's important goalkeepers
have got that ability.
Your goalkeeper's
gotta be one you feel
can produce
a match-winning save.
PLAYER: Yes, Lainton. Oh.
LEE: Nice one, Rob.
Itit's tough.
It can be tough, you know?
Ityou know,
I've had it before,
I've made a mistake
and I don't sleep at night.
LEE: I know
what they're going through.
I know what it's like
to make a mistake
in the first two or three
minutes of a game,
and then you've gotta play
the next 83, 85 minutes,
you know, and-and put
that mistake out of your head,
which is easier said
than done.
[soft music]
[mallet clinking]
[dramatic music]
ANNOUNCER:
Horrible collision.
ANNOUNCER:
That doesn't look too good.
ANNOUNCER: No.
ANNOUNCER: Lainton stays down.
And this could be bad news
for Wrexham.
Rob Lainton is down
and not moving.
[high-pitched ringing]
[staggered breathing]
[muffled chatter]
DECLAN SWANS: [singing]
Invested so much as a penny
Bring on the Deadpool
and Rob McElhenney
MARK: You all right?
WENDY:
Right.
What's the next dates
of the gigs?
Swan's Gate, I think.
Yeah.
I've got two treatments to go.
I got tomorrow,
and then hopefully I finish
on November the 3rd.
Erm, and fingers crossed
that'll be it.
[both laugh]
- [Scoot clears throat]
- [laughs]
[upbeat percussive music]
[players talking indistinctly]
Yeah.
PERSON: Is it?
No.
PERSON:
But if you
PERSON: Press it.
It's sore if you squeeze it.
Rhino
is that what it's called?
Women go and get it and, like
- Rhinoplasty.
Rhinoplasty.
What did I call it?
Rhino-ostrophy?
PERSON: [laughing] Rhino
[lively music]
TICKET PERSON: Hello.
Charlie, get your tickets.
Oh, yeah, here I come.
[cheers and applause]
[chanting]
[tense music]
PHIL: Make sure we win
that battle tonight.
We're aggressive,
we're front-foot,
we're positive,
but we're in control.
Enjoy the night.
Go and get these fans
out of their seats,
fuckin' behind ya.
PLAYER: Come on!
PLAYER: Come on, let's go!
PLAYER: Come on,
let's fucking go.
CROWD: Wrexham, Wrexham,
Wrexham, Wrexham!
[whistle blows]
ANNOUNCER: Lainton launches
it long, Mullin chasing.
He's beaten to it, though,
and it's flicked back.
[cheers and applause]
You're early!
ANNOUNCER:
Tozer does well in the end.
The ball hits Rowe's hand.
He's offsides!
ANNOUNCER: Tshimanga
looks well offsides!
But the flanks is down.
He's cutting in!
Tight angle,
and Lainton saves well.
Ball's through the eight.
PERSON: Is he not offsides?
PERSON: No.
All right,
keep us going, son!
ANNOUNCER: I think
Chesterfield are probably
winning the physical battle.
ANNOUNCER: Free kick.
ANNOUNCER: Chesterfield ready
to make a run.
ANNOUNCER:
Watch the two round the back.
Watch the two round the back
in the block.
ANNOUNCER:
Swept to the far post,
free header, and across
to face a goal!
Chesterfield take the lead.
And there you go.
That's why you have
to be alert.
MARK: Wrexham have not
defended well.
Shock for Wrexham.
Chesterfield are playing well.
And as the game's progressing,
increasingly so, we're not.
ANNOUNCER: Ooh, Oldaker
makes a great tackle.
FAN: Hey!
BOTH: Fuck off!
FAN:
It's our free kick! Ay!
It's our free kick!
[suspenseful music]
ANNOUNCER: He's lost it
and he's turned by Kellermann
Who puts another nice-looking
ball towards Tshimanga.
It's a penalty.
It's gotta be, isn't it?
ANNOUNCER: Yeah.
[whistle blows]
ANNOUNCER:
And Wrexham are in trouble.
[tense music]
I think he's gonna give
Tshimanga the go-ahead.
The Wrexham fans threaten
to put him off.
[cheers and applause]
ANNOUNCER:
Saved.
Big save by Lainton.
FAN: Fucking come on!
[dramatic music]
We played the whole
of the 38 minutes in that half.
Our own half,
that's where we played.
We're not gonna win the game,
are we?
We're not gonna win the game.
We've had a fucking lifeline
it was the penalty save.
We've been given a lifeline.
Grasp it with both hands.
[dramatic music]
[indistinct chatter]
SCOOT: Before cancer,
I've never been in hospital.
I've never given blood.
On the day of chemotherapy,
you get weighed,
they give you
what's called a "flush" first
and then theythey actually
give you the chemo,
so you're sitting there
with your arm up.
Then you've got this, erm,
big bag next to you
of the stuff
that you're pumping into you.
You basically keep watching
the bag and just waiting
for it to just go down
and down and down and down,
and you're looking
at your clock all the time.
I had this, like, painkiller
into me
going into me back to keep me
so I was spaced out
a lot of the time as well.
And yeah.
[emotional music]
Schoolboy memories.
You know, I was thinking
about me dad.
We do a lot together.
I mean, she watches Wrexham
as well.
Football was a big part
of me thoughts, but
[cheers and applause]
[soulful instrumental music]
CROWD:
Wrexham!
ANNOUNCER: Tozer slings
towardsand Lee head balls.
And it's in!
[cheers and applause]
Come on! Come on!
ANNOUNCER: Out of nowhere,
Wrexham gets the equalizer!
Free header, Mullin!
Last thing at home.
DOCTOR: Wow.
[cheers and applause]
DOCTOR: Well done.
NURSE: Yay!
SCOOT:
Thank you very much.
REPORTER: Well, we're now
nine games into the season
and still miles away
in 12th place,
but after a poor first half,
you have to be encouraged
by how Wrexham responded
in that second half
against a true rival
for promotion.
Promising signs,
and it's the first trial
we seem to have emerged from
looking stronger.
Hopefully Phil can keep
this side going like this
and we can see
continued improvement now.
[sentimental music]
- Eh?
- Lainton.
I'm not too sure
'cause I've been
in the physio room, so he
he won't be too long.
Hop in.
Yeah, disappointed
when they awarded the penalty.
Uh, but Rob's a good goalkeeper
and, um, you know,
it was a big moment for us.
Let's enjoy the day.
Not just make the most of it,
you know.
What can we achieve today
for the team?
Because people remember being
at games with their kids
and watching, you know,
great moments,
and they live
live in their memories as much
as the people that are
actually involved in them,
out on the pitch
or on the touchline.
Let's try and string
a couple of wins together
and we'll be back up there.
ALL:
Iechyd da.
ANNETTE:
Football for me is far more
than the actual game
of football.
It's being here
with your football family.
It'sit's the whole
match day experience.
Go, baby, go.
BOTH:
Ooh.
McELHENNEY: I don't remember
any specific game.
I just remember
the bonding experience
between you and the people
who have been following
this adventure.
BOTH: Goal!
- Goal, goal, goal, goal.
Goal, goal, goal,
goal, goal, goal,
SAM: Yeah.
LAINTON: Well done, lad.
SAM: Cheers.
LAINTON: See you later.
CODY: Thank you.
SAM: Good game. See ya.
See ya next week.
[child giggles, seagull cries]