Dogs in Space (2021) s01e06 Episode Script
Speak
1
[dogs screaming]
[ship crashes]
Dig this
We're the last hope of the human race ♪
Embark on a journey ♪
Into outer space ♪
Blast off, there's no going back
We're on our way ♪
Dogs in Space! ♪
Woo! ♪
Dogs in Space! ♪
We Shrubdub have a saying
[whooshes]
It's difficult to translate,
but your tragic story made me feel it.
I believe that your planet
is worthy of saving.
We shall give you a seed
that will restore your home
to greenery once again.
Take him to the seed vault!
[chuckles]
[tings]
See, we'll just say whatever
that guy said!
Anyone write it down?
[sighs]
[tings]
Well, this race of "Chelseas"
sound like they're incredible.
Oh, it's not a race, but if it was,
Chelsea would definitely win.
She's a human from planet Earth.
Earth? I know Earth! I vacationed there
about 600 seasons ago.
There was one creature I just adored.
What was it?
Oh, the dodo! How is the dodo?
- [gasps]
- Humans hunted to extinction,
and other species too.
[gasps] They did what?
But in humans defense,
I heard they were delicious
Oh, what What he means is humans
look out for each other, right, guys?
Exactly! They're, um peaceful.
Oh, yeah! Humans are obsessed with peace.
You should see all the wars
they fight to preserve it!
[fake coughs] Not helping.
[tutting]
And now they send you
to save their planet for them.
What happened to it?
Meteor fallout? Extreme volcanic activity?
Fungal infection?
[groans]
Don't tell me.
The humans destroyed their own planet?
- No!
- Yes. Mostly by polluting the air
and cutting down all the trees.
Well, it's clear the Earth needs saving,
from the human race!
I think we can just tip the Earth
a little so all the humans fall off.
We can do that, right?
- [screams]
- Wait! You've got humans all wrong.
Weeds must be pulled
or the garden is overrun.
You seem honest.
Would humans learn
from their mistakes, or repeat them?
[whispers] Say yes.
Wait, say no!
Wait, say yes to the first part,
and no to the second part.
You don't need to wipe humans out.
- [sighs]
- They're wiping themselves out
- all on their own.
- [gasps]
As long as the Earth suffers
from the problem known as "humans,"
no seed.
[gavel bangs]
I was just being honest!
You're just mad because you're convinced
humans abandoned you,
but Chelsea
Chelsea abandoned you too, you know?
- Oh, snap!
- Nomi!
One day, you'll realize that.
[clears throat] Captain, I need your input
in the mission report on our failure.
- Failure is not an option.
- But it is though, there's a tick box.
Desperate times call for heroic measures.
[gasps]
If they won't give us a seed,
we'll have to take one!
Well, that doesn't sound very heroic.
Well, does saving millions of lives
sound heroic?
Very! But those Shrubdubs scare me.
They can wipe out humanity
with the click of their
I wanna say, twigs? [munches]
Well, to steal from them,
we'd need an airtight plan.
- I mean, who's gonna have
- [Ed coughs]
Of course, he has blueprints.
[scoffs] I plan a couple of heists
for every new place we visit.
It's kind of my hobby.
While you were distracted
with the mission, I was casing the joint,
but for my plan to work,
we need six dogs.
[gasps]
Mm! Got to admit,
having thumbs ain't so bad!
Kira, we're planning a heist,
and Ed says we can't do it without you.
Just think, you'd be helping
save an entire planet!
An entire planet of furless,
tailless jerks.
You shouldn't risk your lives for them.
Okay, I was hoping
it wouldn't come to this, but
[whimpers]
Puppy dog-eyes don't work on me.
Okay, how about normal dog-eyes then?
[sighs]
It's okay, we try it with five dogs.
Maybe four dogs by the end,
but hey, Chonies, you had a good run.
- What?
- Nomi, heist music!
Right, first up, the security.
Proximity sensors will alert those eels
if we approach.
That happens, and zap, we're hot dogs!
There are also security drones.
Yes! [chuckles]
I love taking down drones!
It's all the fun of blasting something
without the guilt of blasting something.
[Ed] There are your cameras, your lasers,
your trap doors to cosmic acid goo,
all standard heist stuff.
But the vault is guarded by a cog door
and she's a beaut!
You gotta stop the cogs
on the right combination of symbols.
Mess up, and it opens up portals
full of nasty creatures.
It sounds unnecessarily convoluted.
I know!
The vault is a big fridge kept ice cold
so the seeds don't sprout.
We'll need one of their vacuum sealed
boxes to loot that loot.
Finally, guards everywhere,
and these Shrubdubs
have thorns figuratively,
also, literally.
This seems really dangerous.
What's everyone so worried about?
It wouldn't be
heroes-overcoming-crazy-impossible-odds
if there weren't crazy impossible odds!
Why don't we split the difference?
Stay here and watch a heist movie!
You're right. This would be
foolhardy if not for
the nebula.
[all] Ooh!
[Ed] The station needs
to pass through it daily to draw power,
but the nebula has one
very fun side effect.
It renders all language
itself incomprehensible.
Wait, so we won't be
able to talk! That's
Fine!
And neither will the Shrubdub.
They won't be able to speak to each other,
or raise the alarm for ten minutes.
It's the only weakness they have.
That, and presumably, fire.
Captain, there's no way we can do this.
There's no way we can't not do this!
We are going to save the Earth!
Garbage, you can't even save
your leftovers for tomorrow.
[groans] You said the plan needs six dogs?
- If Chonies is to survive, yes.
- Please?
[sighs]
Thank you.
I'm not doing this for humans,
I'm doing this so you don't die.
[whimpers]
Here's the plan. Like all of my best work,
it starts with an impenetrable disguise.
This feels weird.
Oh, here comes the nebula!
Then the clouds turned black,
our crops died,
and the oceans dried up.
Our planet is on the brink of extinction.
One of my children turned to me,
saying something that haunts me
to this day. She said
[hoots like an owl]
[hoots]
[alarm blaring]
[barks]
[ticking]
[barks, grunts]
[weak grunt]
[Ed barks]
[grunts]
[whimpers]
[beeping]
- [barks]
- [growls]
[whimpers]
[groans, grunts]
- [barks]
- [grunts]
- [barks]
- [barks]
[screeches]
[barks]
[barks]
They did it! Nomi, the disgusting tangle
of eels is the signal.
Go, go, go, go!
Are we close enough yet?
When is the nebula
going to work on [barks]
[barks, howls]
[soft barks] Hm.
[groans]
- [barks]
- [barks]
[barks]
[scanning, beeps]
[whimpers]
[barks]
- [playing video game]
- [gasps]
[grunts]
[grunts]
[scanning, beeps]
[barks]
[barks]
[gasps]
[screams]
[pants]
[whimpers]
[gasps]
[both bark]
[barks]
[grunts]
- [barks]
- [barks]
- [grunts]
- [growls]
[groans]
[grunts]
[barks]
[beeps]
[grunts]
[barks]
[barks]
[growls]
- [screams]
- [thud]
[barks]
[barks]
[whimpers]
[barks]
[gasps, barks]
[barks]
[grunts]
[gasps]
[barks]
[whines]
[gasps, barks]
[barks]
[barks]
[barks]
[barks]
[gasps]
- [barks]
- [barks, grunts, whimpers, barks]
[gasps]
[barks]
[gasps]
[barks]
[grunts, barks]
[gasps, barks]
[grunts]
[whimpers]
[groans]
- [groans]
- [whimpers]
[whimpers]
[barks]
[whimpers]
[barks]
[weak bark]
[virtual dog barks]
- [grunts]
- [alarm blaring]
[barks]
[barks]
[grunts, barks]
[shrieks]
[grunts, barks]
[barks, grunts]
[roars]
Whoa!
[barks]
[grunts]
[Chonies barks]
Huh? [grunts]
[barks]
[barks]
We track that shield
and go help the other
[both] Wait, what are you talking about?
- Congratulate me later.
- [gasps]
We need to figure out
how to fly this home.
- Are you crazy? We have to save the crew!
- They're fine!
Don't let me distract you, Captain.
Just a bit tricky to breathe,
but carry on! I I
What? You heard him! Totally fine!
Garbage, you've put everyone
in danger today.
This mission is over!
You need to drop the seed!
No! I need to take the seed
home to Chelsea.
This will fix everything!
Is Chelsea more important
to you than your crew? Look at them!
[grunts]
[chokes, groans]
Chonies, release the force field.
00 M-BARK
[sighs] My heist streak, broken!
I gotta steal something.
Like like Like that wrench!
No! Let me heist the wrench!
[gasps]
Kira, where are you going?
- I'm leaving.
- What?
Leaving? Why?
You said all dogs look out for each other,
and I was gullible enough
to think you meant it.
I know today didn't go as planned.
You're risking your fur for humans,
while they sit back at home
and wait for you to be a good dog
and obey their commands!
They don't deserve your loyalty.
I can't speak for all humans,
but Chelsea is worth saving.
If you had an owner like her,
you'd under
I did have an owner like her, Garbage!
A P.R.A.T.S. scientist,
just like your Chelsea!
I sent out distress signals every day,
and she never came looking!
She never even told
the M-Bark I was lost!
My owner forgot about me!
- Well, that doesn't mean
- Chelsea's forgotten about you?
You've sent her messages every day, and?
Maybe she's just not getting
Maybe she doesn't care, Garbage.
Your loyalty is in the wrong place.
If it came to a choice between saving
the dogs and saving humans,
you'd make the wrong call.
That's why I'm leaving.
Wait, I wouldn't.
I won't sacrifice my crew
or any dog on this ship for anything.
I made the wrong call today,
but I won't again.
Dogs over humans, you mean it?
I mean it.
Okay.
[gasps] You'd betray our mission,
would you, Garbage?
We'll see about that.
Earth
[outro theme music playing]
[dogs screaming]
[ship crashes]
Dig this
We're the last hope of the human race ♪
Embark on a journey ♪
Into outer space ♪
Blast off, there's no going back
We're on our way ♪
Dogs in Space! ♪
Woo! ♪
Dogs in Space! ♪
We Shrubdub have a saying
[whooshes]
It's difficult to translate,
but your tragic story made me feel it.
I believe that your planet
is worthy of saving.
We shall give you a seed
that will restore your home
to greenery once again.
Take him to the seed vault!
[chuckles]
[tings]
See, we'll just say whatever
that guy said!
Anyone write it down?
[sighs]
[tings]
Well, this race of "Chelseas"
sound like they're incredible.
Oh, it's not a race, but if it was,
Chelsea would definitely win.
She's a human from planet Earth.
Earth? I know Earth! I vacationed there
about 600 seasons ago.
There was one creature I just adored.
What was it?
Oh, the dodo! How is the dodo?
- [gasps]
- Humans hunted to extinction,
and other species too.
[gasps] They did what?
But in humans defense,
I heard they were delicious
Oh, what What he means is humans
look out for each other, right, guys?
Exactly! They're, um peaceful.
Oh, yeah! Humans are obsessed with peace.
You should see all the wars
they fight to preserve it!
[fake coughs] Not helping.
[tutting]
And now they send you
to save their planet for them.
What happened to it?
Meteor fallout? Extreme volcanic activity?
Fungal infection?
[groans]
Don't tell me.
The humans destroyed their own planet?
- No!
- Yes. Mostly by polluting the air
and cutting down all the trees.
Well, it's clear the Earth needs saving,
from the human race!
I think we can just tip the Earth
a little so all the humans fall off.
We can do that, right?
- [screams]
- Wait! You've got humans all wrong.
Weeds must be pulled
or the garden is overrun.
You seem honest.
Would humans learn
from their mistakes, or repeat them?
[whispers] Say yes.
Wait, say no!
Wait, say yes to the first part,
and no to the second part.
You don't need to wipe humans out.
- [sighs]
- They're wiping themselves out
- all on their own.
- [gasps]
As long as the Earth suffers
from the problem known as "humans,"
no seed.
[gavel bangs]
I was just being honest!
You're just mad because you're convinced
humans abandoned you,
but Chelsea
Chelsea abandoned you too, you know?
- Oh, snap!
- Nomi!
One day, you'll realize that.
[clears throat] Captain, I need your input
in the mission report on our failure.
- Failure is not an option.
- But it is though, there's a tick box.
Desperate times call for heroic measures.
[gasps]
If they won't give us a seed,
we'll have to take one!
Well, that doesn't sound very heroic.
Well, does saving millions of lives
sound heroic?
Very! But those Shrubdubs scare me.
They can wipe out humanity
with the click of their
I wanna say, twigs? [munches]
Well, to steal from them,
we'd need an airtight plan.
- I mean, who's gonna have
- [Ed coughs]
Of course, he has blueprints.
[scoffs] I plan a couple of heists
for every new place we visit.
It's kind of my hobby.
While you were distracted
with the mission, I was casing the joint,
but for my plan to work,
we need six dogs.
[gasps]
Mm! Got to admit,
having thumbs ain't so bad!
Kira, we're planning a heist,
and Ed says we can't do it without you.
Just think, you'd be helping
save an entire planet!
An entire planet of furless,
tailless jerks.
You shouldn't risk your lives for them.
Okay, I was hoping
it wouldn't come to this, but
[whimpers]
Puppy dog-eyes don't work on me.
Okay, how about normal dog-eyes then?
[sighs]
It's okay, we try it with five dogs.
Maybe four dogs by the end,
but hey, Chonies, you had a good run.
- What?
- Nomi, heist music!
Right, first up, the security.
Proximity sensors will alert those eels
if we approach.
That happens, and zap, we're hot dogs!
There are also security drones.
Yes! [chuckles]
I love taking down drones!
It's all the fun of blasting something
without the guilt of blasting something.
[Ed] There are your cameras, your lasers,
your trap doors to cosmic acid goo,
all standard heist stuff.
But the vault is guarded by a cog door
and she's a beaut!
You gotta stop the cogs
on the right combination of symbols.
Mess up, and it opens up portals
full of nasty creatures.
It sounds unnecessarily convoluted.
I know!
The vault is a big fridge kept ice cold
so the seeds don't sprout.
We'll need one of their vacuum sealed
boxes to loot that loot.
Finally, guards everywhere,
and these Shrubdubs
have thorns figuratively,
also, literally.
This seems really dangerous.
What's everyone so worried about?
It wouldn't be
heroes-overcoming-crazy-impossible-odds
if there weren't crazy impossible odds!
Why don't we split the difference?
Stay here and watch a heist movie!
You're right. This would be
foolhardy if not for
the nebula.
[all] Ooh!
[Ed] The station needs
to pass through it daily to draw power,
but the nebula has one
very fun side effect.
It renders all language
itself incomprehensible.
Wait, so we won't be
able to talk! That's
Fine!
And neither will the Shrubdub.
They won't be able to speak to each other,
or raise the alarm for ten minutes.
It's the only weakness they have.
That, and presumably, fire.
Captain, there's no way we can do this.
There's no way we can't not do this!
We are going to save the Earth!
Garbage, you can't even save
your leftovers for tomorrow.
[groans] You said the plan needs six dogs?
- If Chonies is to survive, yes.
- Please?
[sighs]
Thank you.
I'm not doing this for humans,
I'm doing this so you don't die.
[whimpers]
Here's the plan. Like all of my best work,
it starts with an impenetrable disguise.
This feels weird.
Oh, here comes the nebula!
Then the clouds turned black,
our crops died,
and the oceans dried up.
Our planet is on the brink of extinction.
One of my children turned to me,
saying something that haunts me
to this day. She said
[hoots like an owl]
[hoots]
[alarm blaring]
[barks]
[ticking]
[barks, grunts]
[weak grunt]
[Ed barks]
[grunts]
[whimpers]
[beeping]
- [barks]
- [growls]
[whimpers]
[groans, grunts]
- [barks]
- [grunts]
- [barks]
- [barks]
[screeches]
[barks]
[barks]
They did it! Nomi, the disgusting tangle
of eels is the signal.
Go, go, go, go!
Are we close enough yet?
When is the nebula
going to work on [barks]
[barks, howls]
[soft barks] Hm.
[groans]
- [barks]
- [barks]
[barks]
[scanning, beeps]
[whimpers]
[barks]
- [playing video game]
- [gasps]
[grunts]
[grunts]
[scanning, beeps]
[barks]
[barks]
[gasps]
[screams]
[pants]
[whimpers]
[gasps]
[both bark]
[barks]
[grunts]
- [barks]
- [barks]
- [grunts]
- [growls]
[groans]
[grunts]
[barks]
[beeps]
[grunts]
[barks]
[barks]
[growls]
- [screams]
- [thud]
[barks]
[barks]
[whimpers]
[barks]
[gasps, barks]
[barks]
[grunts]
[gasps]
[barks]
[whines]
[gasps, barks]
[barks]
[barks]
[barks]
[barks]
[gasps]
- [barks]
- [barks, grunts, whimpers, barks]
[gasps]
[barks]
[gasps]
[barks]
[grunts, barks]
[gasps, barks]
[grunts]
[whimpers]
[groans]
- [groans]
- [whimpers]
[whimpers]
[barks]
[whimpers]
[barks]
[weak bark]
[virtual dog barks]
- [grunts]
- [alarm blaring]
[barks]
[barks]
[grunts, barks]
[shrieks]
[grunts, barks]
[barks, grunts]
[roars]
Whoa!
[barks]
[grunts]
[Chonies barks]
Huh? [grunts]
[barks]
[barks]
We track that shield
and go help the other
[both] Wait, what are you talking about?
- Congratulate me later.
- [gasps]
We need to figure out
how to fly this home.
- Are you crazy? We have to save the crew!
- They're fine!
Don't let me distract you, Captain.
Just a bit tricky to breathe,
but carry on! I I
What? You heard him! Totally fine!
Garbage, you've put everyone
in danger today.
This mission is over!
You need to drop the seed!
No! I need to take the seed
home to Chelsea.
This will fix everything!
Is Chelsea more important
to you than your crew? Look at them!
[grunts]
[chokes, groans]
Chonies, release the force field.
00 M-BARK
[sighs] My heist streak, broken!
I gotta steal something.
Like like Like that wrench!
No! Let me heist the wrench!
[gasps]
Kira, where are you going?
- I'm leaving.
- What?
Leaving? Why?
You said all dogs look out for each other,
and I was gullible enough
to think you meant it.
I know today didn't go as planned.
You're risking your fur for humans,
while they sit back at home
and wait for you to be a good dog
and obey their commands!
They don't deserve your loyalty.
I can't speak for all humans,
but Chelsea is worth saving.
If you had an owner like her,
you'd under
I did have an owner like her, Garbage!
A P.R.A.T.S. scientist,
just like your Chelsea!
I sent out distress signals every day,
and she never came looking!
She never even told
the M-Bark I was lost!
My owner forgot about me!
- Well, that doesn't mean
- Chelsea's forgotten about you?
You've sent her messages every day, and?
Maybe she's just not getting
Maybe she doesn't care, Garbage.
Your loyalty is in the wrong place.
If it came to a choice between saving
the dogs and saving humans,
you'd make the wrong call.
That's why I'm leaving.
Wait, I wouldn't.
I won't sacrifice my crew
or any dog on this ship for anything.
I made the wrong call today,
but I won't again.
Dogs over humans, you mean it?
I mean it.
Okay.
[gasps] You'd betray our mission,
would you, Garbage?
We'll see about that.
Earth
[outro theme music playing]