Life Unexpected (2010) s01e06 Episode Script

Previously on Life Unexpected.
You and someone had a kid, you gave up that kid, i am that kid and now I'm applying for emancipation.
From the people who adopted you? From foster care.
Um, Cate Cassidy that's your mom.
I am Cate Cassidy.
Ryan and I has been up since 5:00.
And, as usual, arguing since 6:00.
- Hey, what are you doing? - Will you marry me? Cate.
Meet Lux, our daughter.
- You never even told me I've got a kid out there.
- Why would I? You wouldn't even admit that she existed.
I am not granting you emancipation.
I'm releasing you back into their temporary joint custody.
Bug, what are you doing? Giving your new friends a night they won't forget.
Hey! What happened? Where's Lux? Her boyfriend stole my car.
- What? - I'm calling the police.
Oh, my God.
There has to be a better way of waking up than this.
I can think of one.
Okay.
I'm going to be right back.
I can't do morning sex with morning breath.
Oh, my God! Oh, my God.
What are you doing? What does it look like? Hey.
- Eyes forward.
- What's going on? What? What? Oh, no, no, no.
This is not okay.
Did you sleep here again? - Again? - Yeah, Lux and I were watching TV.
Hey, did you know that The Real World is still on? She's never even seen it.
I passed out during Hawaii, woke up to San Diego.
There coffee? I'll get rid of him.
Looks like Baze is making himself right at home.
How long has this been going on? Oh.
Last week or two.
Oh.
You're up early.
What's with the iron? Is it school picture day? Bug's arraignment.
For the whole stealing Jones's car unfortunate-ness.
I mean, he eats here, sleeps here, pees here.
Wait.
- Are you skipping school? - Baze got Lux in a car accident Because you cannot miss school.
Baze said I could.
He lets her bartend at his loft.
I mean, what's what's next? You two going to get arrested and thrown in jail together? Oh, wait.
That already happened.
I'll be doing upstairs stuff.
Look a month ago, I had no idea Baze existed.
Now, suddenly, he's spending nights here.
Look, the last person that I'm going to defend is Baze.
I want to check my couch for drool marks.
I just want less Baze in our lives.
Does that make me a bad guy? It makes you like the rest of us.
You're up early.
Never went to bed.
Guess you didn't, either.
Up top.
It wasn't like that.
I was hanging with Lux and kind of fell asleep at Cate's.
Again? Dude, it was a matter of time before this whole dad thing killed your game.
What? I got game.
You used to be the king of the random hookup.
Like Wilt Chamberlain, only shorter.
And whiter.
Now look at you.
You're Math.
I take offense to that.
The last time I had sex was 22 minutes ago.
You? And I'm not talking Tracey.
Ex-girlfriends don't count.
I'm talking random, meaningless, "I don't remember exactly what happened" sex.
Okay.
But you cannot tell Math.
Cate.
No, a month ago.
When Lux first showed up.
What? Do you have a death wish or something? Dude, why would you go there? There's plenty of sex to be had that isn't so loaded.
You don't need to re-screw the girl you already screwed.
It just happened.
Things like that don't just happen.
Unless you You have a thing for Cate.
- No, I don't.
- Yes, you do.
- No, I don't.
- Whoa.
There is no thing.
Okay.
All right.
Then, prove it.
- Sleep with someone else.
- Fine.
But don't call me Math.
So, I'm confused.
I just started listening.
- So, you and Cate have a kid together? - Oh, no, no, no.
Baze and I have a kid.
I'm sorry.
Who's Blaze? Baze.
He's not a pony.
And that's who you got engaged to? No.
Ryan and I - we are engaged.
- Thanks for calling, Kathy.
Does anyone have a question that is not about Baze? How about, uh, Denise from West Linn? Hey, Ryan.
I love you.
I can't believe you and Cate are engaged.
I didn't think she'd ever stop skanking around.
Right here, Denise.
So, when's the wedding? We have not picked a date yet.
- Summer's nice.
- If you want to be a big, giant cliché, yeah.
I mean, why do people want to pigeonhole you and stuff you into this this little box to confine you to this one date that you arbitrarily pick because that's the opening that the Holiday Inn ballroom has available? I mean, come on.
You know what I mean, Denise, right? - Denise? - Uh, yeah.
Denise uh, she hung up.
Okay.
Ok, fine.
Let me just start from the beginning.
I'm just saying, first, you're single, and then everyone wants to know when you're going to find someone.
You know they set you up constantly Regardless of whether the person is actually right for you.
So, this is you not hung up on Cate? I told you, I'm not.
Then you finally get engaged I mean, do you hear her? Who'd be hung up on that? It goes on and on and on and on and on and on and She's grating, right? Her voice? Yes, yes.
It's like seagulls fighting over a cheese sandwich.
Funny.
Thanks.
So, um, do you do you do you come here often? Is this you picking me up? Well, this s s sort of, maybe.
I'm not from here.
Okay.
Shut up.
I've got a venti, no foam, no whip, not gettg any for the big guy right here.
This is crap, man.
I'm not taking a plea.
You know, most people facing two years in prison would think six months is a pretty good deal.
Oh, you mean the other clients you don't give a rat's ass about? He didn't steal the car.
I was borrowing it.
That's not what the plaintiff says.
The plaintiff is a brownnosing pretty boy.
And what, I'm going to go to jail on his say-so? You know, I got to get to my next case.
When you figure it out, you let me know.
Bug, this isn't juvie court.
You could go to jail for two years.
You would be 20, and and I'd be 18.
I know it sucks, but you have to take the plea.
For us.
I got a better idea.
My idiot attorney says if Jones doesn't testify, then there's no case.
How are you going to get him not to? I'm not.
You are.
Come on, Lux.
Talk to Jones.
For us.
We have a serious problem.
Corporate is here.
What? Corporate is here.
They flew in from Chicago last night, but no one bothered to tell me - Hey, guys.
- Hey! - How are you guys? Hey.
- Oh, it's so good to see you.
Thank God.
When I saw you guys coming, I was so worried that Trina was Hey, Trina.
It it's been forever.
Nine months since I last saw you.
Oh.
Wow.
You actually remember.
It's hard to forget you getting drunk at a corporate retreat and knocking over an ice sculpture.
Yeah.
Well, this is a a rare treat.
Since you don't usually oversee our show.
Only when there's a problem.
What's the problem? Not what.
Who.
So, there's good news and bad news.
The good news is people still love Ryan.
As for Cate three weeks ago, you were K-100's single, sharp-tongued darling.
Two weeks ago, you're an unwed mother of a rescue teen.
Today, you are half of an engaged couple who won't pick a wedding date, who spends an inordinate amount of time talking about some guy named Blaze.
Baze.
Uh, his name it's Baze.
I don't care if his name is Brad Pitt, George Clooney, and the big eyebrow dude from Twilight.
Thanks to you, the audience is completely confused.
Do you know what people who tune in do when they get confused? They tune out.
We need to clear up this confusion.
People need a Who's Who to understand the manscape that is your life.
If we don't, your partnership with Ryan, at least on air is over.
Hey, look, it's Slumdog.
I can wait here while you talk to him.
Or come back later.
You can wait here.
'Sup, Prison Break? Yeah, bite me, asshat! Or come back later.
Great party last weekend, huh? You know, minus the whole car debacle.
Debacle means I know what it means.
Mm.
So I need to talk to you about something.
Like a favor.
The charges against Bug.
I I need you to drop them.
You're kidding, right? He's basically got a two-year sentence hanging over his head, just for taking your car.
Just? Look I know that you don't know him, and you don't know me.
And yeah, maybe he made a mistake, a big one.
But he doesn't deserve to go to jail or have a record follow him around for the rest of his life.
I'll do anything.
I will wash your car for a year anything.
Just let Bug off the hook.
Okay.
But he's got to pay for what he did.
How about I take that bike? What bike? Bug's motorcycle.
The Norton? My dad took my Jeep.
Punishment for partying.
I need wheels, and Bug's got two good ones.
He'd never give that bike up.
His dad gave him that.
I guess we'll see what matters more: the bike or you.
She had tables and graphs and everything.
I mean, I have never I've never had my likeability put on a pie chart.
I mean, she couldn't actually split us up, could she? - She could fire us.
- What would I do? Teach community college? I could do voice-overs for feminine hygiene products.
I mean, I have no transferable skills.
Do you remember when she said that my voice gave her night blindness? Well, she's got a way with words.
This makes walking in on Baze peeing this morning seem pretty harmless.
Actually, this makes Baze peeing where we live highly symbolic because you would rather talk about him than pick a wedding date.
Are you serious right now? That you can't go two seconds without bringing up his name? It's not exactly less Baze, Cate.
You guys, Trina wants to talk to us.
Now.
Hey, I I'm looking for a, uh Coffee lady? Bedhead troller? Wow.
You clean up well.
And apparently don't take no for an answer? Hmm.
I'm here to see a, uh Trina Campbell.
She just called me.
Wait a second.
You're who I just spoke to on the phone? I can't believe this.
- You're Baze? - No.
No.
This this is not happening.
This is not an option.
Trina, you said so yourself, all right? We need less confusion.
People want less of this guy, not more.
Like I said, our audience needs to understand where Cate stands with the men in her life.
Cate, Ryan, meet your cohost for tomorrow's show.
Hi.
I'm Cate.
And this is Morning Madness Whoops.
Can't believe you get up this early every day.
I cannot believe that you're really going through with this.
Well, believe it, lady.
Trina's letting me promote my bar on the air.
She's scratching my back, and if I'm lucky, I'm gonna scratch hers.
You disgust me.
This what we're reading from? You two, just hit all the talking points and take caller questions.
Baze, be yourself.
Sound good? And you're on in five Good morning, Portland.
You're joining Morning Madness with Cate and Ryan.
Now, as most of you know, a lot of stuff has come out about us lately, and by us, I mean mostly Cate.
Ah, a teen pregnancy, estranged daughter, secret engagement.
Just another day at the office.
So to clear up the Days of Our Lives episode that is Cate's life, we have a very special guest.
The source of much of this confusion, the mystery man - from the minivan - And, uh, proprietor of Open Bar, a hopping joint on Third and Clover.
Mr.
Nate Bazile.
Or as the Portland P.
D.
fondly refer to him, Baze.
What up, Portland! And.
Thanks for taking me to school.
Baze is You'll never believe what Baze is doing.
What happened with Jones? Well, he said he'd drop the charges But? But you have to give him your bike.
Screw that.
We're talking about jail.
- Yeah, I know, but - You told me to do this for us, and I did, so now what? I I don't get it.
Your bike is more important than us? You think Abercrombie even knows how to ride? So Baze, you recently found out about e daughter you and Cate had together, and you reached out to Cate.
What was that reunion like with her? Well, Ryan, my feelings were mixed.
I mean, part of me felt like I'd just been kicked in the gut.
But at the same time, I sort of felt like I'd been punched in the face.
I guess what I'm trying to say is, she's mean.
Okay, um, let's just remind everyone that you had just ambushed me on air.
You had told the entire greater Portland area that I was pregnant in high school.
Oh, please.
You're a human ambush.
You ambush on autopilot like a ninja.
Ryan, back a brother up.
Ah, do you ever just listen to yourself? You don't even make any sense.
You're not even saying anything.
See? Mean.
K-100 FM.
Great.
Can you hold, please? Heads up.
Bike's out front.
Now we're even.
Okay, let's go to the phones.
We have Jesse from Greenway on the line.
Jesse, what is your question? I'd like to know how it started.
Did you guys go out in high school? Oh, God, no.
No.
I was popular, athletic.
Popular.
Cate's best friend was a dictionary.
She went to prom with a thesaurus.
Really? And who'd you go with? Herpes simplex 2? No.
What I'm saying is - she wasn't exactly my type.
- Yeah, because I had standards and a brain.
You're right.
Bookworm virgin with padded bras? Way hotter.
I was going to cut the rest of classes.
Help me start it, and I'll give you a ride.
With the guy who stole my boyfriend's bike? Thanks, but no.
I just called my dad.
Told him I wasn't going to testify.
Bug's off the hook.
Okay? No jail.
You're a real hero.
Hey, I'm not the bad guy here.
That's your boyfriend.
Get on the back.
What are you doing? I want to show you something.
You know why we didn't hang in high school? 'Cause you were scared.
- Scared of what? - Okay, so Cate, - you have one kid, but now with Baze in your life - 'Cause I was the kind of girl that could see right through you.
it's like you have two.
The only thing - I was scared of was your corrective head gear.
- Oh, my God.
Exhibit A: Any time a real issue is brought up, you deflect with juvenile humor.
Oh, yeah? Kate, you looked like you had a transistor radio coming out of your mouth.
It was gone by junior year! And we have an anonymous caller for Baze again.
I'd like to agree with Cate.
Baze sounds like he's deflecting.
Thank you.
Almost like he's sexually frustrated.
Jamie, is that you? We have got another caller.
Lorena from Hillsboro.
Hi.
I just want to say, best show ever.
I love the two of you.
Oh, well, thank you.
Thank you so much.
Ryan and I we we aim to please.
I meant you and Baze.
You have crazy chemistry, and it sure doesn't sound like things ended in high school.
Has nothing really happened between you guys since then? Oh, my God, - no way.
- Uh, just once.
Once was more than anyone should ever have to go through.
One time.
Uno.
Ryan? Please, just talk to me for a second? Please.
You know, all this time I thought Baze was the moron.
Turns out I'm the biggest idiot around.
Okay, I get that you're mad.
I get it.
I've I've been a nice guy, right? I've been a good guy? - Yeah, you are an amazing guy.
- I was patient and understanding when you treated my marriage proposal like a joke.
When Lux moved in, when that-that that dumb ape, Baze, started messing with our personal and public lives, I took it like a freaking champ.
Now, all I asked for was a little less of him, and now, he's in my booth, in my station, screwing with my career something I have worked at my entire life.
Right.
So have I.
I did not want Baze on the show either.
Kate, you're the reason he is.
Thanks to your fixation over him over the last few weeks, all of Portland is is confused about Cate and Ryan.
And you know what? So am I.
Whoa, what are we talking about? Do you have feelings for him, for Baze? - What? - Come on, Cate.
Come on, the night of that turtle thing, I saw, I saw the two of you sitting at his bar.
Okay, I saw how you were together.
Are are you kidding me? No, I'm not.
And that look between you two just now when, when Lorena from Hillsboro called and asked you that question? Hmm? Has anything ever happened between you guys since high school? Ryan, no, nothing has happened.
I mean, you believe me, right? Honestly? Yeah.
I don't know what I believe anymore.
Not exactly Nob Hill, right? What are we doing here? This house that's where Bug grew up.
What? Am I supposed to feel sorry for him? Come on.
Bug's dad's in jail dealer turned convict.
I don't think we should be back here.
When Bug was nine, his mom OD'd while he was playing in the yard back here.
She was okay eventually, but she checked out of his whole childhood and let his dad beat the crap out of him until Child Protective Services took Bug away.
So, then, why does he want to keep that bike if it was his dad's? Listen.
A while ago, I got placed in this foster home out in Gresham.
It was as bad as this place.
This one Christmas, the mom she was awful.
But she gave me this locket.
It was cheap costume jewelry that someone had given her and she didn't want, but I wore it until it broke and fell off my neck.
I guess I held on to it because I don't know.
It's it's better than having nothing.
And that's what Bug has: nothing.
He can have his bike back.
Okay? He can have it.
I don't even want it anymore.
Really? You'd do that for Bug? It's not just for Bug, and, uh, you're wrong about one thing.
He doesn't have nothing.
He has you.
- What are you doing? - Sorry, I I have a boyfriend.
- No, I know.
- Bug and I are together.
That was the whole point of all of this.
No, I mean, I have a girlfriend, I know.
You know what? Let's just get out of here.
You can drive.
I I don't care.
I just want to go home.
You live above a bar? Of course you do.
Not classy enough for you? Today's show, and day drinking, has opened my eyes to your unique appeal.
Talking out of my butt and drinking like a fish? Exactly.
You are so wrong.
You drive a truck, listen to Starship.
How long was your longest relationship? Hmm, three weeks, maybe four.
I bet you have a roommate.
Two.
Ooh.
Mmm.
Jamie, it's the beer guy! I'm busy.
You okay? What? Yeah, no, sorry.
Oh, my God.
Cate.
Wait.
Wait.
Cate, come on.
Let me explain.
Explain? I mean, I just walked in on you on top of my boss.
Oh, God, that image, I I just I feel assaulted.
You essentially just raped my eyes.
Would you just relax? It's not like it meant anything.
Oh, that's reassuring.
Hey, why, why do you even care? I don't.
I just I think that sex is supposed to mean something, you know, ideally, and so if you're doing it with Trina, it obviously doesn't.
You said it yourself: when you and I had sex, it meant nothing.
So which is it, Cate? When you and I did it, did it mean something or not? Look.
I'm with Ryan, okay? I am in love with Ryan, and I just came here to ask you to back off.
You know, he's pissed right now 'cause he doesn't believe that nothing happened between us.
Right, because something did.
God, Cate, if you're that stressed out, grow a pair and tell him the truth.
Why, because you, you're such an honest, stand-up guy? You always go around telling people the truth? I'm not the one with a fiancé that I am lying to every day.
Ryan wants less of you in our lives.
That's what I came here to say.
So do I.
What the hell? You take my bike like a little bitch, - and now you're up on my girl? - Bug, no.
- Dude, relax.
- Don't tell me to relax, bro.
Bug, leave it.
He's giving you your bike back.
Yeah, you need to chill.
You take one more step and I will kick your face in.
This is a freaking joke.
You're getting me to take this plea "for us," to give my bike to Abercrombie here "for us"? It was for us.
You want to be with this guy, just say it.
I don't.
Stop lying.
What happened with you? Nothing! - Where were you? - Nowhere.
We just drove around.
Yeah? Were you as easy with him as you were with me? You know what, dude? That is enough.
Stop! I can't believe you.
What, you think he likes you? He's using you.
He's not going to love you like I do.
No one is.
White Bread just wants to know what it feels like to hook up with damaged goods.
You okay? Yeah, I'm good.
Lux, get in the house.
You, get off my property, or I will call the cops.
Hey, so I, uh, I gave Jones a ride home.
He's going to be all right.
Thanks.
Mm-hmm.
Does he act like that a lot, Bug? Sometimes.
He's not really good with people not wanting him.
Go figure.
Imagine what he would have done if I told him that Jones tried to kiss me.
Wait.
What? I I pushed him away.
It's nothing.
It's stupid.
I don't really want to talk about it.
You don't have to feel bad for having feelings for more than one person.
I don't.
It's not like you with Ryan and Baze.
Um, well, there is no me and Baze.
No, I I know you're with Ryan, and he's who you want to be with, but I don't know You and Baze are you and Baze.
Okay, look, um, what Bug said to you.
.
I know that must have hurt.
You are not any more damaged than anyone else.
I know you.
You may have been through more, sure, but we are all damaged: me, you, Bug.
I mean, if I wasn't, how could I have slept with Baze behind Ryan's back? Why did you? 'Cause when I'm around Baze, it's like I'm still in high school.
I still feel like the girl in the head gear, you know, dating her dictionary, wanting him to notice me.
You know, it's like he taps into this screwed-up part of me that wants him to I don't know, um think I'm good enough.
It's pretty messed up, huh? Do you have feelings for him, for Baze? Do I have feelings for Baze? Yeah.
Yeah, I have angry feelings.
Rejected feelings.
You know, deep down I'm sure that I have good feelings.
But what I feel for Baze, it's nothing like I feel for Ryan.
And it's definitely not love.
And the way that Bug was to you down there, the way that he spoke to you You know, that's not love, either.
If I tell him the truth If I tell him where I was today or about Jones he's gonna be so mad.
He already is.
You have to tell him that you deserve better, Lux.
What if he leaves me? So what, you can lie to Bug about where you were and what happened with Jones and how you feel about the way that he's treating you you know, just to hold onto him? But then your whole relationship it's not real.
It's not honest.
If I tell him the truth I could lose him.
What if I lose him? Maybe that's a risk you have to take.
Lux, hey.
Hey.
- Hey.
- Hi.
I wanted to talk to you.
You, uh wanna come in? I'm okay.
This won't take long.
When you asked me where I was today, I was with Jones.
I was showing him where you grew up so that he would understand.
And when you asked me if anything had happened between us I lied.
About Baze.
I was just scared to tell you.
Um something did happen.
You know, that night that that Lux took off we drove around looking for her.
I mean, it was after the hearing and we tried to call Social Services, We just really didn't know where to go or what to do so we ended up back at Baze's bar.
You know, and we started talking about high school and the winter formal and you know, how we got together - in the first place.
- Just say it, Cate.
He kissed me.
Baze did.
What else? Just say it, Cate.
What else happened? Ryan Did you sleep with him? Just don't even tell me you slept with him.
I did not sleep with him.
Of course I didn't sleep with him.
He kissed me.
I pushed him away.
That's all.
I swear, I told him to stop.
That I had a boyfriend and to take me home.
And I wanted to tell you.
I would have.
But when we pulled up, you were already so mad.
I never meant to lie to you.
I mean, I wasn't even thinking about it as lying.
I just I really didn't want to make a big deal about something that meant nothing.
You know, but if I'd just told you right when it happened I mean, what if I just told you right when it happened? I would have tried to understand.
I'm trying to undersnd now.
I mean, that's what you do when you love someone.
And I do.
I love you.
Even if Baze tries to kiss you, I love you.
I just I just wish you would have told me the truth.
So, us what do we do? Well, first, I'm gonna punch that guy's lights out.
And then, um I don't know.
We get married, maybe? I don't deserve a guy like you.
I deserve better than how you treated me in front of Cate and Jones today.
You want better, go find better.
No one's stopping you.
What? What am I supposed to say? I don't know! Anything! "I'm sorry," maybe? I don't get this side of you.
It's like you turn into your Don't say it.
It's true.
You become your dad.
You should go be with Abercrombie.
That's not what I'm saying.
No, you're right.
You deserve better.
I don't want to be my dad.
I never wanna be that guy with you.
No, Bug, that's not You need to go.
You shouldn't be with me.
Go.
Should I be worried that not a single person is looking at me in the eye? Think positive.
- I'm fired, for sure.
- That's the spirit.
I would say that you make me sick except I wanna kiss both of you right now.
Great news: Yesterday's show went over huge! Even corporate was impressed.
- Trina almost smiled.
- I don't believe it.
After hearing you and Baze, our listeners, they feel like they know you better and they wanna root for you, especially after hearing how big a sad-sack you were in high school.
I guess we have Baze to thank.
Uh, I don't think so.
And it's awkward.
Oh, you're on in ten.
Nine, eight And now, live from beautiful downtown Portland, it's your hosts Kate Cassidy and Ryan Thomas on K-100 Hey, everybody, it's Hump Day.
It's bright and early on a Wednesday morning.
June 26.
Now, hold on there.
It's not summer yet.
No, June 26.
It's a Saturday.
It's also Flag Day in Romania.
And it's the day that Ryan took me to his favorite Italian restaurant.
After watching me annihilate four cannolis, he still wanted to make out.
And it's the date that Ryan and I will be getting married.
Unless you have any objections.
I like June 26.
Some of you might remember a little rant I went on a couple of days ago about how being married is like being stuck in a box.
The thing is, being stuck, it isn't so bad if you've got the right guy to stick it out with you.
Hey, rounding up some dudes for some late-night poker.
Or are you gonna be at Cate's? Actually, I'm gonna lay off hanging at Cate's for a while.
All right.
You're in.
The most diamonds under the sun for prices that are out of this world: Diamond Nation.
Cate adds one more impressive role to her ever-expanding resume.
You are listening to Morning Madness with Cate and Ryan.
Hey, are you okay? Why wouldn't I be? I was just worried, you and Bug I said I'm fine, Jones.
Thanks.
It's just I got you this necklace.
Hey, Gavin.
You okay? What's wrong? What happened? Bug left.
Gavin said he's gone.
I did what you said.
I told him the truth, and he left.
I mean, what should I have done? Lied so he'd stay? You did the right thing.
You did.