Outer Banks (2020) s01e06 Episode Script
Parcel 9
1
There are only three
kinds of relationships
in the animal kingdom.
The first is commensalism.
One example fish finding
hiding spots in coral reefs.
Fish profit, but life for
the coral doesn't change.
- Then, there's mutualism
- What happened?
a relationship where both
animals benefit from each other.
The tricky thing about animals
is you don't always know
what kind of relationship you're in.
Which brings me to
relationship number three.
The parasitic.
Welcome home, kid.
This is your room.
Whoa.
It's not too shabby, huh?
Yeah. Not too shabby at all.
And my room is just upstairs,
in case you were wondering.
- Are you okay?
- Yeah. No, I'm good.
I'm good. I got it.
- But I have to warn you
- Uh-oh.
I sleepwalk.
So if I show up in your room
- in the middle of the night
- You just want me to roll with it?
Yeah, maybe.
Sarah Elizabeth Cameron!
You've already broken the first
rule. What is the first rule?
Stay out of each other's rooms.
All right, seriously.
Picture that as a boundary.
This is like a minefield.
- Yes, sir?
- Yes, sir.
- Yes, sir, John B?
- Uh, yes, sir. Yeah.
All right.
Sarah, can you give me and the
new inmate a quick minute here?
Please be nice.
I'll be nice.
How you doin'? How's the arm?
- Uh, better.
- You're lucky.
Fall any other way,
you don't hit that sand,
you could've broken both
your legs and your back.
Yeah, I'm super lucky.
I just wanna say thank you
for sticking up to DCS for me.
Don't even think about it. Happy
to do it. One other thing. Um
Last night, Sarah was in my office,
and she was getting a map, and
she said it was for you, and
I'm sorry, but I just have to ask.
You're not chasin' after pots of gold
like your old man, are you, John B?
Look, Mr. C, uh Sarah just told me
you guys had some cool old maps.
Mm-hm.
I'm kind of a history
buff myself, and, uh
that, I guess, I got
from my dad, so
That makes sense.
Anyway, uh take it easy the
next couple days, all right?
- Absolutely.
- You've been through a lot.
I'm sorry. You're staying where?
Tannyhill.
So you're living with Sarah Cameron.
Okay, look, the only
reason I'm living there
is because her dad bailed me out, right?
And it's way better than foster
care, which, by the way,
is where I was about
to go if Ward didn't
Hey, so do you have a
membership to the clubs now?
I don't know, Pope.
What about those golf carts they
drive around? You get one of them?
Does it come with a sweater-vest,
or do you have to buy one on your own?
Look, you promised.
You said you weren't with her.
Bro, just own it. She got you.
Look, if you wanna hang out
with her, that's fine.
But I'm letting you know now that
I'm not doing anything with Sarah.
Do you guys see her here?
No, right. Okay. A little
focus would be fantastic.
We've got the map, right?
It's out of whack 'cause the guy
was ganja'd when he drew it.
It's 'cause the coast has changed.
So we just have to look for
landmarks that haven't changed.
What about the old forts?
Battery Jasper.
We're in Battery, right here.
So if this is parcel nine, then it's
somewhere northeast of here.
- Somewhere there.
- Right.
Over there? Guy's, that's not
Tannyhill, that's a subdivision.
Tannyhill Plantation
was the entire island.
It got sold into smaller
pieces over time.
So we're just looking
for an old stone wall.
Okay, so the road should split up here.
- Okay.
- All right. You're gonna take a left.
That looks like a stone wall to me.
This is it.
Not the Crain house.
Are you kidding me?
Worst-case scenario.
Why'd it have to be here
of all places?
I heard that Mrs. Crain buried her
husband's head on the property.
Domestic disturbance,
potential home invasion.
Reports had it wrong.
Nobody invaded anybody.
Two men were here, Lana.
The only questions I have
is why were they here,
and why are you protecting them?
You mean to tell me you ripped
the front door off its hinges?
I was upset. I had to break something.
- Grief does powerful things.
- Not that powerful.
I got the GPS coordinates
off Scooter's Grady-White.
I mapped out the route he
took that last day. You mind?
Wanna know where he went? It's curious.
On the day of the hurricane, when
he should've been here with you,
he was riskin' his life,
goin' to an uninhabited island
30 miles offshore.
Now, Scooter
he wasn't a stupid man.
Why he out in open water
on the day of the storm?
If you're afraid of somebody,
I can protect you.
I told you, I don't know anything.
You gonna give me a bump, big boy?
Man, check out this place, though, huh?
- Hey, Barry. Barry. Hey, man.
- It's fancy!
It's a nice place to live!
- I don't have your money.
- Mm-hm.
All right? Uh you shouldn't
be here now. What are you doing?
I'm right here. You wanna know why?
Give me till the weekend, okay?
All I all I need you to
do is front me more coke.
- Mm-hm. Yeah.
- I got a guy coming this weekend.
- It's cool, right?
- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
How come you got all
this nice shit, though?
Can you tell me that?
You ain't got my money,
but you got all this nice shit.
- Man, yeah, just
- Hm? Hm?
- Hey, chill, chill! All right Hey!
- Come here!
Hey! Get off! What're you doing? Hey!
Put that on there. Yeah!
- Hey! Shit! Stop, stop, stop, stop!
- That's it!
- That's it, you little bitch!
- Okay, stop, stop! Okay, chill, man.
How's that feel, baby boy?
That's just the coming
attractions, big boy.
Consider this shit right
here your down payment.
You got three days.
Look, you guys know
whose house this is, right?
Oh, yeah. No, I do.
Honestly, I don't really believe
the stories of this place.
- Shh.
- What?
Which stories did you hear?
The one where she killed
her husband with an axe
and that she's been holed up ever since.
On certain nights,
when the moon is full
you can see her in the window!
- No, it's not funny, 'cause it's all true.
- Waah!
I swear to God, guys, this is
all real. I knew Hollis. Jeez!
- Wait, you knew Hollis Crain?
- Yeah, dude.
Dude, how do you know Hollis Crain?
She was my babysitter, man.
She told me all about it.
Told me the truth about her mother
and what happened in this house.
So as a kid,
she heard all the stories that her
mother killed her father, and
she was a murderer and all.
Hollis didn't believe it.
- Until that night.
- What night?
It all came back to her.
When Hollis was six years old,
she heard her parents
arguing downstairs.
So she goes downstairs to see her
mom washing her hands in a sink
full of blood.
Her mother just says
that she cut her finger.
The next morning, she says
her father and her split up.
But then, Hollis noticed something.
Her mother going into
the parlor constantly,
in and out and in and
out with plastic bags.
Weeks pass, and Hollis
decides to use the outhouse.
And as she's using it, she looks down,
and there, in the outhouse,
is her father's head,
looking straight back at her.
God, you are so full of shit.
Dude, I swear to God, man.
- Did she call the police?
- She didn't have time.
- We can't do this
- Wait! Dude!
What?
You sure you wanna do this? She's
an axe murderer. You got a cast on.
I don't give a shit if she's
an axe murderer, okay?
I got nothin' to lose, right?
You comin' or what?
Come on.
Hey, come on. Come here.
So here's the plan. We need to
look for the wheat near the water
like it said in Denmark's letter.
Okay, like, what kind of
water? Like, pond water?
Bong water?
No. It it just said
look for water, okay?
That's the shittiest
secret message ever.
You wanna complain a little more, Kie?
Nobody said it was gonna be easy.
I'll search the northeast quadrant,
you search the northwest.
The decapitation quadrant.
Hey, psst!
Hey, come on.
It's the only place we haven't looked.
Oh, shit
Here we go.
Down came Mrs. Crain ♪
And cut off all our heads ♪
Up came the sun ♪
And dried up all the blood ♪
Can you stop?
See any water?
Another dead end?
There's not even water on the pipes.
There's no water here.
- Not a dropamino.
- Know why we didn't find it?
Bad karma.
Oh, God. Here we go.
You know, we had a good thing going.
And then you decide to rope in Barbie,
and now the trail's gone dry.
Coincidence? Probably not.
This is exactly why I didn't
wanna tell you about Sarah.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- What the hell's the deal with you two?
- Nothing.
Nothing? Is it because I kissed you?
Is that the problem?
- Oh!
- Oh, shit!
- That echoed, dude!
- Stop treating me
like I'm some girl that's
obsessed with you
instead of your best friend
who's actually trying
to look out for you.
Did you, uh hit me?
- Skeeter.
- Skeeter?
- Yeah, you see it?
- Yeah.
- Oh, hey!
- Okay
- No
- Where's your proof?
Skeeter.
Yeah? There was probably
one right there.
- There's one right there.
- Really?
- You saw that?
- Sh!
- On your forehead.
- You're dead. That's it.
Today's the day that you die.
- Jesus.
- Today's your funeral.
One bandito.
- These things are a freakin' swarm!
- You see this?
Hey, sh! Keep it down!
You know how this ends.
Why are there so many
mosquitoes in a basement?
Dude. I know, seriously. Tiny
vampire bats, just leave me alone.
Oh, my gosh! Okay, can we leave?
'Cause I'm already itchin' to leave.
Hah? Punny.
All right Ow!
I just found Mrs. Crain's
voodoo doll, guys.
Oh, shit.
All right, can we leave this?
'Cause this is getting
Skeeter, for real.
- Hey, guys.
- Hey, Pope!
- Oh!
- Sh!
- Hey. Help me move this.
- Sh! Um
- Help me move this.
- Okay, just quiet.
- All right.
- Hey.
Sh!
- Guys! Guys!
- Guys. I know.
Yeah. Yeah. Sh, sh.
She's probably right upstairs.
Well, well, well.
That was a good dad joke.
They built this part of
the house right over it.
- This is where she hid the bodies.
- Oh, dude, come on.
- Stop.
- No, I'm dead serious.
- Stop it!
- Hey, hey.
- It was never an outhouse.
- She probably doesn't even know it's here.
So
we found water.
We're gonna need a really big rope.
Hey.
Hey, how's John B?
Is he is he doin' all right?
Like you give a shit.
You realize I did not push him.
- He lost his balance and fell.
- Don't lie.
He fell against the rail. Not my fault.
That is messed up.
You forget about us, like
Midsummers was supposed to be
our our coming-out party.
That was supposed to be
something special, right?
What does it matter, Topper?
We're in high school.
It's not like we're getting married.
I don't care if we're in
high school! I love you!
- No, you don't, Topper!
- I love you!
You love the idea of me.
- You love being seen with me
- Stop.
but you don't love me.
You have no idea what I'm
feeling. You have no clue.
What about what about
this summer? Right?
This summer was supposed
to be legendary.
I don't care anymore, Topper.
I can't be with you.
Not after last night.
- Oh, after last night?
- Yeah.
You you wanna talk about last night?
- Sure.
- Did you forget the part
where you cheated on me? Huh?
Did you forget about that?
You're a slut! You know
that? You're a slut!
Watch your mouth when
you talk about my daughter!
Your daughter's banging a Pogue
- Dad.
- You need to go home, Topper.
Dad, stop!
Dad, let go of him, please.
Come on. Come on.
Come on.
What the hell was Scooter
Grubbs doin' out this far?
Hell of a place to come on
the day of a hurricane.
Yes, it is.
It's just a spit of land.
The shoals ain't that big.
You take this side, I'll take the other.
What is it I'm supposed to
be looking for, anyway?
Anything that might tell us
what Scooter Grubbs was
doin' here the night he died.
- So you found the gold?
- Yes.
But under an axe murderer's house?
Well, yeah, uh kind of.
- That's perfect.
- Yes.
I mean, the only thing is the
well is super sketchy deep.
Kinda wish I was with you guys.
You'll be there for real tonight.
- Is it okay?
- Yeah, of course.
What? Vlad and Val gotta
be together, right?
No, no. I mean with the others.
Yes, everything's fine.
What?
- Kiara said something, didn't she?
- No.
- You're the worst liar I've ever met.
- I'm not lying.
Look, if she's gonna get territorial
Hey, hey, hey, just listen. All right?
You're a part of this too.
You got us the Tannyhill map.
Once we get with everybody,
they're gonna be excited.
I promise.
No effing way!
You brought her here?
So what? She's in on this now?
I dunno.
Look, all I care about is her
cut comes out of your share.
You know, I don't
remember taking a vote.
This is our thing.
A Pogue thing.
I gotta say, I'm just a tad
uncomfortable with all of this.
- Thank you!
- When are you not?
I dunno. I rode here on the back
of JJ's bike pretty comfortably.
It's true. Most relaxed
I've ever seen him.
That's cute, guys.
You know we were all extremely
comfortable until you brought her.
Stop talking about me like I'm not here!
Then leave.
I told you.
Told him what, exactly?
- That you're a liar?
- No, that you're a shit-talking bitch.
- Oh, shit!
- When have I lied?
- My money's on Kie.
- You get somebody close to you
- I didn't lie about shit
- Everybody shut up!
Kie, you are my best friend, right?
And Sarah, you're
you're my
Say it.
You're my girlfriend.
Ohh that's new.
She's your girlfriend now?
What was all that talk about you
were just using her for information?
Get a map, cut her loose.
You said you were using me?
- No.
- Yeah, you did.
- You said those things.
- Look, love just walked in, okay?
- Oh, vomit.
- I didn't expect it.
It just it kind of happened.
And I'm not gonna deny it.
- Right?
- Oh! That's corny.
Look, cut the bullshit, John B.
If she's in, I'm out.
- I'm not doing this. I can't!
- You are gonna decide.
I'm very interested,
actually. Me or her?
Both.
- Ooh.
- Went for the Hail Mary.
Noooo!
It'll be cool, right?
I'm gonna leave.
- Sarah, don't.
- Gonna let y'all chat. Let me know.
I'd just like to say,
you handled that beautifully.
Dad?
Four, three, three, zero, zero. Okay.
Four, three okay
Shit! Come on.
Four, three, three
Okay! Yeah.
Okay, okay. Okay.
Checking the time?
Uh
Corpses cry too, you know.
Well, they secrete
fluid from their eyes.
Maybe not compare my
feelings to secretions?
Technically, it's discharge.
I'll stop talking now.
What're you doing?
Just
Uh I don't know.
Just be your usual weird self, okay?
I hate John B right now.
Look, it's just because
I know how this ends.
I've seen this movie.
I starred in it.
I mean, freshman year, it was my
first year at the Kook Academy.
You know how intimidating that is?
And one of these things is
obviously not like the other.
I mean, I didn't have anything
in common with anyone,
and just as I'm about to slit my wrists,
the queen asks me if I wanna
go save baby sea turtles.
Our first day together,
we walked to the beach.
We waited for the hatch,
and we kept the seagulls off
so that the turtles
could get to the water.
That actually sounds kinda nice.
It was the best day of my life.
And then she turned on me
like she does with everyone.
Look, I'm not doing this with her.
He's gonna have to choose.
You know he can't do that.
Why not?
Because he's an idiot.
If it were me I know who I'd choose.
What'd she say?
That you're an idiot.
- It's a no-brainer. You're picking Kie.
- Mm-mm.
Look, I can't make a decision.
So what? We're just dead in the
water because you're pussy-whipped?
We can't do this without
Kie, and you know it.
And I can't do it without Sarah.
Okay? They both have to be in on it.
Well, good luck with that.
You know what? I know this
was my fault, all right?
But it's our problem.
I've got a plan.
And you two shitheads
are gonna help me out.
Unusual style, isn't it?
Now check this out.
Holy shit!
It's Big John's glasses.
One of the four biggest cases
we had in the last year.
Big John Routledge, missin' person.
Scooter Grubbs drowns.
And two mainlanders dead
by homicide. Four things.
What I'm thinkin' is that
these four things
are all the same thing.
I swear.
I learned my lesson, okay?
Stay in the car.
You Barry?
Yeah. Who the hell are you?
My son owes you money.
- Who's your son?
- Rafe. My son Rafe owes you money.
So, uh
you must be the babysitter, huh?
Ohh!
Why'd you do that, huh?
'Cause if that's my money
right there, then
wanna put it in my hand?
That's not gonna happen.
I paid it, you pick it up.
All right.
Shit, though, man.
That boy 19 years old,
and you out here takin' care of him
like he just some little
baby-ass bitch, huh?
That's a damn shame.
But I'll take your money.
Ain't the first time
I told you to stay in the goddamn car.
Get your bike.
I'll pay you back.
No, Rafe.
You won't.
You know why you won't?
Because you're a liar.
And you're a thief.
And you cannot be trusted.
And I can't have you in my house, son.
Don't come home.
Where do you want me to go?
Dad!
Dad!
- Code red!
- What the hell is going on?
Okay, JJ and John B
conked out in the marsh.
They need a tow.
Uh, okay, well, what does
that have to do with me?
We need you for mechanical.
Mechanical.
John B and JJ are up in the Alp.
Can't you guys do anything without me?
What happened?
Uh, the alternator's, uh,
not alternating anymore.
- It's not charged.
- Did you check the plugs?
- No. No, you should check 'em.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Give it a whirl.
- You guys are useless.
- Sorry about that.
Come on, come on, come on!
- Uh is this a joke?
- Go, go, go, go!
- There are no plugs, like, at all.
- Sayonara!
- Shit.
- John B!
John B, let me out!
John John B!
- What? Wait.
- What the hell?
Guys!
- Ah!
- Are you serious?
Are you joking?
Get your asses back here!
We can't. Not till
you two figure it out.
- I will kill every single one of you!
- Y-You can't just leave!
There's food in the cabin,
and JJ rolled a blunt.
- Hydroponic!
- This is ridiculous.
Well, I would rather drown
than stay here with you, so
Fine, be my guest. Maybe
you'll finally shut the hell up.
You don't even know where you're going.
I don't care.
Good luck with the oyster beds.
- Wait!
- Godspeed!
Wait!
John B, you asshole!
They're not coming back for you!
Love you, guys! Bye!
Great.
What?
I got stung by a jellyfish! Shit!
- Ah!
- Dramatic.
Shit.
Well, you swam right into a man-o'-war.
Don't know what you
thought would happen.
Thanks for your help.
Ow.
Shit.
- Ow!
- Does it hurt?
Hey, Kiara. You know what they say
- No. Mm-mm.
- about curing jellyfish stings?
You have to pee on me.
I have a better idea.
- It's for the pain.
- JJ, bless.
Actually
Really?
Go easy.
It's JJ's cousin's Cripple.
Yeah.
Wow.
Hey, guess what?
Would you rather have
I was imagining you like this just now.
It was pretty funny.
Would you ima would you rather
have nipples for eyes
or eyes for nipples?
Imagine if you get really
old and your nipples
Your boobs get saggy, and your
nipples, if they were your eyes,
you could see if your shoes were untied.
Is this like your first time
smoking or something?
No.
Hey, Kiara
Oh, my God.
Enough of the "Hey, Kiara!" bullshit!
Why'd you do it?
Why did I do what?
We were best friends.
We we stole beers
from your dad's fridge,
we watched movies together,
we cried about boys.
And the next thing I know,
I'm watching your birthday
party happen from Instagram.
It was one party.
You invited everybody except me.
And then you told everybody
I was the reason
that the party got busted.
Okay, well, who else
would've called the cops?
You never asked.
You just let the rumor
go that I was a rat.
You were my best friend,
and then you ghosted me,
and I don't even know why!
I mean, really, what did I do?
You liked me.
What?
When people get
close to me,
I feel trapped.
And I bail.
And then I blame them for it.
I'm really sorry
and I miss you.
Do you think there's a chance
that we could be okay again?
Honestly
I don't know.
Hey, Sarah.
Hey, Kiara.
Promise me that you
won't bail on John B.
He's not just
some other guy.
And he really, really likes you.
I won't.
Promise me.
I promise.
Also, I'm sorry I called the cops.
I knew it.
I knew it, you bitch!
I told you!
You you should've invited me.
So you called the cops?
Yes!
Uh-oh!
- You forget your keys or something?
- You need a tow?
Don't give them the satisfaction
of thinking this worked.
- Absolutely not.
- You gotta admit it was funny.
- John B.
- Uh, what's that?
- Mastermind, huh?
- I'm always plannin'.
- Some patriarchal bullshit.
- Yeah, that sucked.
You still love us though, right?
Here.
- Yeah, whatever.
- Hey, you still hate me?
A little. We're both gonna get you
back when you least expect it.
- Watch your back, boys.
- Mm-hm.
- I welcome that challenge.
- Me too.
So, did you guys, you know
Reconcile our differences?
- Mm-mm.
- Not even close.
- But we're willing to work together.
- Mm.
You know what?
- That's victory.
- Yep.
Wiggedy-wiggedy-wiggedy!
- Know why? Hydroponic.
- Don't say that.
All right, shut up. You guys
ready to jack someone up?
- Yeah, whatever.
- Yep.
In the boat.
Let's get it.
- You got rope?
- Got it.
- Grappling hook?
- No grappling hook.
We're not Batman.
- Pulley?
- Check.
Dark clothes?
- Got it.
- Flashlights?
- Check.
- All right, good.
- We're ready.
- Let's go.
Let's go get rich, guys.
Yeah. Hell, yeah.
- Go, boys.
- And girls.
- Let's go.
- Let's roll.
- Right on.
- Wait, wait
I wanna say thank you, guys. Seriously.
It means a lot to me that
you're here tonight.
Always.
Of course, man.
My man.
All right, we done with the circle
jerk? Can we go do this?
Yeah.
Let's get that wheat in the water.
- Weed? I'm up for weed.
- Wheat. I said wheat.
- After you.
- Ladies first.
Alley-oop.
- Shit!
- Oh, shit!
- Go, go, go, go.
- Flashlights!
- It's on strobe!
- Flashlights.
Shh!
Okay
Okay, so she has motion sensor lights.
We could, uh move
really slowly, maybe?
- What?
- That's not how it works.
- Oh, shit. Let's throw a rock at it.
- What?
That's a really good idea. Let the
axe murderer know that we're here.
- Throw a rock at it?
- You have a better idea?
Literally anything but that.
What about the breaker?
In the circuit box on the porch.
We used to play
hide-and-seek here as kids.
And if we were brave enough,
we'd go all the way up to the porch.
I've seen it.
No, no. You're not going
in the house alone.
- Watch me.
- Crain chops people into pieces.
If you believe that,
but she's like what, 85?
- Yeah, somethin' like that.
- She's probably barely still kicking.
Here. I'll go with you.
- Yeah.
- We'll wait for your signal.
- Okay, cool.
- Hey! Be safe.
We will.
- Be safe.
- I'll be so safe.
- I'll be safe for you.
- Can you guys stop? Stop!
I'm gonna kill you.
But how would that keep us safe?
She must have a generator plugged
into the main power supply.
Shh
Where are the breakers?
- What is this?
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Shit.
It goes inside.
They said when Hollis disappeared
That you should shut the eff up!
Hey.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh.
- All right.
- Okay.
They did it. Go time.
So, let's do it.
Three, two
Just just just go.
Holy crap, you know what this is?
It just hit me.
Pope, look.
This is C.H.U.D. Full C.H.U.D.
What is he talking about?
Cannibalistic humanoid
underground dwellers?
Have you guys not seen that film?
- No.
- Can't say I have, no.
It's actually a good film.
It's about cannibals
that live in the sewers
and under New York
City, and it's like
Shut up! Shut up!
All right. How deep do
you think this is, Pope?
I don't know.
Shit.
Hey, boys. I have one request.
- Yeah?
- Yeah?
Don't drop me.
- Whoa!
- Okay
- You're gonna die first, for sure.
- Got ya.
All right, just keep payin' it
out nice and slow like that.
Here we go. Keep goin'.
Keep goin'.
Wait, hold on one second.
I'm gonna get situated.
You good?
Oh, my
- Oh, shit! John, shit!
- Whoa! What
Jesus!
- John B!
- I told you not to drop me!
- You good, man?
- What the hell was that?
Little technical difficulties.
Keep going, slow!
Okay, we're gonna start paying
you out again, all right?
Shit.
Okay. Okay. All right, keep goin'.
All right. Keep it comin'.
Okay.
Hey. Hey, we got 15 feet left.
- Are you getting close to the bottom?
- I can't tell.
- Just just keep goin'.
- Give me more.
Yeah
Whoa! Stop!
I'm hangin' over some
sewage-water lookin' shit.
You want back up?
Keep goin', I guess
Nice and slow.
Here we go.
Okay.
Oh.
Okay, okay! I'm at bottom.
How is it down there?
It's worse than I thought.
It's it's late, Leon.
Too late.
- You find any gold?
- Uh, nothin' yet.
Wait.
I think I felt something with my foot.
Here goes nothin'.
Mr. Crain.
JJ! Hey, pull me up!
- Pull me up!
- Pull him up!
- Come on, man! Go!
- Come on, pull him up!
Go! Come on! Pull me up!
Come on! Pull me up! Pull me up!
Come on!
Shit!
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! Wait!
Hey, I think I found something.
Hey, John B!
What'd you say?
Just give me a minute. Hold on.
Okay. Okay.
Hm.
I can hear you, Leon.
I've been waiting all night!
Go!
Go! Go!
- Leon!
- Shit!
- Shit!
- Where are you, Leon?
Huh?
Come on
John B, you okay?
Any dead bodies?
Shit
We did it, Dad.
Oh!
Oh! Oh!
Okay
- Come on, this way!
- Okay.
Okay.
Shit!
This way! It goes underneath the house!
- Go, go, go, go!
- I'm trying!
- Go!
- Guys!
- Guys!
- Guys!
- What's going on?
- Mrs. Crain! She's up there!
She tried to kill us with a fire poker.
- We gotta go.
- We locked her in the parlor,
- but we gotta go.
- Okay, code red.
- We have to go!
- Let's go. John B! Get back on, man!
- Hey!
- JJ!
Hold on, man! I'm comin'!
- Come on!
- Three, two, one, pull!
- Jeez.
- Shit!
- Where the hell is he?
- Shit.
- Sh! Sh!
- John B!
- Hey!
- Guys. Sh!
I found the gold!
What's he saying?
JJ! Pope! Kie!
Yo, he's drowning!
- We gotta pull him up!
- John B!
Hey, John B! Get back on the rope.
We're gonna pull you
back up, okay, buddy?
Come on!
- Come on! Pull!
- Come on.
- Okay, everybody, help!
- Guys!
Okay, I'm on!
- Guys!
- Yeah! Yeah!
- Okay.
- Let's go.
Come on!
Pull!
- Shit!
- Jesus!
- Shit!
- Shit! Hang on!
Pope! JJ! What the hell?
Climb up!
- Help me! Hang on!
- Tie it up now, man!
Pope, hide!
Go! Go!
- She can't aim for shit.
- She can't see.
She's blind.
Shit! Go!
Go, Sarah!
Go! Go!
- Go! Go!
- I don't care if she is, that's buckshot!
Whoo!
JJ! Pope! Kie! Yeah!
Can we go now?
- Get into the car!
- Come on!
- Get to the car!
- Go! Go!
- Where is he?
- Come on, start the car. Go!
John B!
Why are we always getting shot at?
Come on! John B, run!
- Come on! Come on!
- Wait! Wait, wait, wait, wait!
- Get in!
- Wait!
- Whoa!
- Oh, shit!
- Oh, my God!
- Shit!
- JJ, drive!
- Go, man!
- Oh, my God!
- God!
- Are you okay? Are you shot?
- No.
- You good?
- Yeah, yeah.
I think I'd know if I was shot, right?
You look disgusting.
- God, you smell like ass.
- What the hell just happened?
All-time Pogue Hall of Fame, baby.
Hell, yeah.
- That bitch is possessed.
- That bitch can't aim.
- How does she move that fast?
- She's possessed.
- I don't get it.
- She's blind.
- Like Master Yoda.
- Dunno.
- It makes no sense, scientifically.
- She does yoga. Pilates.
- Oh, God!
- Oh, my God!
- What is that?
- No, you didn't!
- We did it, baby!
- No, you didn't!
- I did it!
- Oh, my God!
- I did it!
- Oh, my God!
I did it!
- Holy shit! Holy shit!
- Whoo-hoo-hoo!
Whoo!
That's gold!
Wait! Wait!
- Holy shit!
- Guys, we're gonna be rich!
- Full Kook!
- Like Kook rich.
Full Kook! Full Kook!
Full Kook! Full Kook!
Full Kook! Full Kook! Ay-ay-ay!
- Ay-ay-ay!
- Oh!
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
- A lot of gold.
- Oh, my God.
There are only three
kinds of relationships
in the animal kingdom.
The first is commensalism.
One example fish finding
hiding spots in coral reefs.
Fish profit, but life for
the coral doesn't change.
- Then, there's mutualism
- What happened?
a relationship where both
animals benefit from each other.
The tricky thing about animals
is you don't always know
what kind of relationship you're in.
Which brings me to
relationship number three.
The parasitic.
Welcome home, kid.
This is your room.
Whoa.
It's not too shabby, huh?
Yeah. Not too shabby at all.
And my room is just upstairs,
in case you were wondering.
- Are you okay?
- Yeah. No, I'm good.
I'm good. I got it.
- But I have to warn you
- Uh-oh.
I sleepwalk.
So if I show up in your room
- in the middle of the night
- You just want me to roll with it?
Yeah, maybe.
Sarah Elizabeth Cameron!
You've already broken the first
rule. What is the first rule?
Stay out of each other's rooms.
All right, seriously.
Picture that as a boundary.
This is like a minefield.
- Yes, sir?
- Yes, sir.
- Yes, sir, John B?
- Uh, yes, sir. Yeah.
All right.
Sarah, can you give me and the
new inmate a quick minute here?
Please be nice.
I'll be nice.
How you doin'? How's the arm?
- Uh, better.
- You're lucky.
Fall any other way,
you don't hit that sand,
you could've broken both
your legs and your back.
Yeah, I'm super lucky.
I just wanna say thank you
for sticking up to DCS for me.
Don't even think about it. Happy
to do it. One other thing. Um
Last night, Sarah was in my office,
and she was getting a map, and
she said it was for you, and
I'm sorry, but I just have to ask.
You're not chasin' after pots of gold
like your old man, are you, John B?
Look, Mr. C, uh Sarah just told me
you guys had some cool old maps.
Mm-hm.
I'm kind of a history
buff myself, and, uh
that, I guess, I got
from my dad, so
That makes sense.
Anyway, uh take it easy the
next couple days, all right?
- Absolutely.
- You've been through a lot.
I'm sorry. You're staying where?
Tannyhill.
So you're living with Sarah Cameron.
Okay, look, the only
reason I'm living there
is because her dad bailed me out, right?
And it's way better than foster
care, which, by the way,
is where I was about
to go if Ward didn't
Hey, so do you have a
membership to the clubs now?
I don't know, Pope.
What about those golf carts they
drive around? You get one of them?
Does it come with a sweater-vest,
or do you have to buy one on your own?
Look, you promised.
You said you weren't with her.
Bro, just own it. She got you.
Look, if you wanna hang out
with her, that's fine.
But I'm letting you know now that
I'm not doing anything with Sarah.
Do you guys see her here?
No, right. Okay. A little
focus would be fantastic.
We've got the map, right?
It's out of whack 'cause the guy
was ganja'd when he drew it.
It's 'cause the coast has changed.
So we just have to look for
landmarks that haven't changed.
What about the old forts?
Battery Jasper.
We're in Battery, right here.
So if this is parcel nine, then it's
somewhere northeast of here.
- Somewhere there.
- Right.
Over there? Guy's, that's not
Tannyhill, that's a subdivision.
Tannyhill Plantation
was the entire island.
It got sold into smaller
pieces over time.
So we're just looking
for an old stone wall.
Okay, so the road should split up here.
- Okay.
- All right. You're gonna take a left.
That looks like a stone wall to me.
This is it.
Not the Crain house.
Are you kidding me?
Worst-case scenario.
Why'd it have to be here
of all places?
I heard that Mrs. Crain buried her
husband's head on the property.
Domestic disturbance,
potential home invasion.
Reports had it wrong.
Nobody invaded anybody.
Two men were here, Lana.
The only questions I have
is why were they here,
and why are you protecting them?
You mean to tell me you ripped
the front door off its hinges?
I was upset. I had to break something.
- Grief does powerful things.
- Not that powerful.
I got the GPS coordinates
off Scooter's Grady-White.
I mapped out the route he
took that last day. You mind?
Wanna know where he went? It's curious.
On the day of the hurricane, when
he should've been here with you,
he was riskin' his life,
goin' to an uninhabited island
30 miles offshore.
Now, Scooter
he wasn't a stupid man.
Why he out in open water
on the day of the storm?
If you're afraid of somebody,
I can protect you.
I told you, I don't know anything.
You gonna give me a bump, big boy?
Man, check out this place, though, huh?
- Hey, Barry. Barry. Hey, man.
- It's fancy!
It's a nice place to live!
- I don't have your money.
- Mm-hm.
All right? Uh you shouldn't
be here now. What are you doing?
I'm right here. You wanna know why?
Give me till the weekend, okay?
All I all I need you to
do is front me more coke.
- Mm-hm. Yeah.
- I got a guy coming this weekend.
- It's cool, right?
- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
How come you got all
this nice shit, though?
Can you tell me that?
You ain't got my money,
but you got all this nice shit.
- Man, yeah, just
- Hm? Hm?
- Hey, chill, chill! All right Hey!
- Come here!
Hey! Get off! What're you doing? Hey!
Put that on there. Yeah!
- Hey! Shit! Stop, stop, stop, stop!
- That's it!
- That's it, you little bitch!
- Okay, stop, stop! Okay, chill, man.
How's that feel, baby boy?
That's just the coming
attractions, big boy.
Consider this shit right
here your down payment.
You got three days.
Look, you guys know
whose house this is, right?
Oh, yeah. No, I do.
Honestly, I don't really believe
the stories of this place.
- Shh.
- What?
Which stories did you hear?
The one where she killed
her husband with an axe
and that she's been holed up ever since.
On certain nights,
when the moon is full
you can see her in the window!
- No, it's not funny, 'cause it's all true.
- Waah!
I swear to God, guys, this is
all real. I knew Hollis. Jeez!
- Wait, you knew Hollis Crain?
- Yeah, dude.
Dude, how do you know Hollis Crain?
She was my babysitter, man.
She told me all about it.
Told me the truth about her mother
and what happened in this house.
So as a kid,
she heard all the stories that her
mother killed her father, and
she was a murderer and all.
Hollis didn't believe it.
- Until that night.
- What night?
It all came back to her.
When Hollis was six years old,
she heard her parents
arguing downstairs.
So she goes downstairs to see her
mom washing her hands in a sink
full of blood.
Her mother just says
that she cut her finger.
The next morning, she says
her father and her split up.
But then, Hollis noticed something.
Her mother going into
the parlor constantly,
in and out and in and
out with plastic bags.
Weeks pass, and Hollis
decides to use the outhouse.
And as she's using it, she looks down,
and there, in the outhouse,
is her father's head,
looking straight back at her.
God, you are so full of shit.
Dude, I swear to God, man.
- Did she call the police?
- She didn't have time.
- We can't do this
- Wait! Dude!
What?
You sure you wanna do this? She's
an axe murderer. You got a cast on.
I don't give a shit if she's
an axe murderer, okay?
I got nothin' to lose, right?
You comin' or what?
Come on.
Hey, come on. Come here.
So here's the plan. We need to
look for the wheat near the water
like it said in Denmark's letter.
Okay, like, what kind of
water? Like, pond water?
Bong water?
No. It it just said
look for water, okay?
That's the shittiest
secret message ever.
You wanna complain a little more, Kie?
Nobody said it was gonna be easy.
I'll search the northeast quadrant,
you search the northwest.
The decapitation quadrant.
Hey, psst!
Hey, come on.
It's the only place we haven't looked.
Oh, shit
Here we go.
Down came Mrs. Crain ♪
And cut off all our heads ♪
Up came the sun ♪
And dried up all the blood ♪
Can you stop?
See any water?
Another dead end?
There's not even water on the pipes.
There's no water here.
- Not a dropamino.
- Know why we didn't find it?
Bad karma.
Oh, God. Here we go.
You know, we had a good thing going.
And then you decide to rope in Barbie,
and now the trail's gone dry.
Coincidence? Probably not.
This is exactly why I didn't
wanna tell you about Sarah.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- What the hell's the deal with you two?
- Nothing.
Nothing? Is it because I kissed you?
Is that the problem?
- Oh!
- Oh, shit!
- That echoed, dude!
- Stop treating me
like I'm some girl that's
obsessed with you
instead of your best friend
who's actually trying
to look out for you.
Did you, uh hit me?
- Skeeter.
- Skeeter?
- Yeah, you see it?
- Yeah.
- Oh, hey!
- Okay
- No
- Where's your proof?
Skeeter.
Yeah? There was probably
one right there.
- There's one right there.
- Really?
- You saw that?
- Sh!
- On your forehead.
- You're dead. That's it.
Today's the day that you die.
- Jesus.
- Today's your funeral.
One bandito.
- These things are a freakin' swarm!
- You see this?
Hey, sh! Keep it down!
You know how this ends.
Why are there so many
mosquitoes in a basement?
Dude. I know, seriously. Tiny
vampire bats, just leave me alone.
Oh, my gosh! Okay, can we leave?
'Cause I'm already itchin' to leave.
Hah? Punny.
All right Ow!
I just found Mrs. Crain's
voodoo doll, guys.
Oh, shit.
All right, can we leave this?
'Cause this is getting
Skeeter, for real.
- Hey, guys.
- Hey, Pope!
- Oh!
- Sh!
- Hey. Help me move this.
- Sh! Um
- Help me move this.
- Okay, just quiet.
- All right.
- Hey.
Sh!
- Guys! Guys!
- Guys. I know.
Yeah. Yeah. Sh, sh.
She's probably right upstairs.
Well, well, well.
That was a good dad joke.
They built this part of
the house right over it.
- This is where she hid the bodies.
- Oh, dude, come on.
- Stop.
- No, I'm dead serious.
- Stop it!
- Hey, hey.
- It was never an outhouse.
- She probably doesn't even know it's here.
So
we found water.
We're gonna need a really big rope.
Hey.
Hey, how's John B?
Is he is he doin' all right?
Like you give a shit.
You realize I did not push him.
- He lost his balance and fell.
- Don't lie.
He fell against the rail. Not my fault.
That is messed up.
You forget about us, like
Midsummers was supposed to be
our our coming-out party.
That was supposed to be
something special, right?
What does it matter, Topper?
We're in high school.
It's not like we're getting married.
I don't care if we're in
high school! I love you!
- No, you don't, Topper!
- I love you!
You love the idea of me.
- You love being seen with me
- Stop.
but you don't love me.
You have no idea what I'm
feeling. You have no clue.
What about what about
this summer? Right?
This summer was supposed
to be legendary.
I don't care anymore, Topper.
I can't be with you.
Not after last night.
- Oh, after last night?
- Yeah.
You you wanna talk about last night?
- Sure.
- Did you forget the part
where you cheated on me? Huh?
Did you forget about that?
You're a slut! You know
that? You're a slut!
Watch your mouth when
you talk about my daughter!
Your daughter's banging a Pogue
- Dad.
- You need to go home, Topper.
Dad, stop!
Dad, let go of him, please.
Come on. Come on.
Come on.
What the hell was Scooter
Grubbs doin' out this far?
Hell of a place to come on
the day of a hurricane.
Yes, it is.
It's just a spit of land.
The shoals ain't that big.
You take this side, I'll take the other.
What is it I'm supposed to
be looking for, anyway?
Anything that might tell us
what Scooter Grubbs was
doin' here the night he died.
- So you found the gold?
- Yes.
But under an axe murderer's house?
Well, yeah, uh kind of.
- That's perfect.
- Yes.
I mean, the only thing is the
well is super sketchy deep.
Kinda wish I was with you guys.
You'll be there for real tonight.
- Is it okay?
- Yeah, of course.
What? Vlad and Val gotta
be together, right?
No, no. I mean with the others.
Yes, everything's fine.
What?
- Kiara said something, didn't she?
- No.
- You're the worst liar I've ever met.
- I'm not lying.
Look, if she's gonna get territorial
Hey, hey, hey, just listen. All right?
You're a part of this too.
You got us the Tannyhill map.
Once we get with everybody,
they're gonna be excited.
I promise.
No effing way!
You brought her here?
So what? She's in on this now?
I dunno.
Look, all I care about is her
cut comes out of your share.
You know, I don't
remember taking a vote.
This is our thing.
A Pogue thing.
I gotta say, I'm just a tad
uncomfortable with all of this.
- Thank you!
- When are you not?
I dunno. I rode here on the back
of JJ's bike pretty comfortably.
It's true. Most relaxed
I've ever seen him.
That's cute, guys.
You know we were all extremely
comfortable until you brought her.
Stop talking about me like I'm not here!
Then leave.
I told you.
Told him what, exactly?
- That you're a liar?
- No, that you're a shit-talking bitch.
- Oh, shit!
- When have I lied?
- My money's on Kie.
- You get somebody close to you
- I didn't lie about shit
- Everybody shut up!
Kie, you are my best friend, right?
And Sarah, you're
you're my
Say it.
You're my girlfriend.
Ohh that's new.
She's your girlfriend now?
What was all that talk about you
were just using her for information?
Get a map, cut her loose.
You said you were using me?
- No.
- Yeah, you did.
- You said those things.
- Look, love just walked in, okay?
- Oh, vomit.
- I didn't expect it.
It just it kind of happened.
And I'm not gonna deny it.
- Right?
- Oh! That's corny.
Look, cut the bullshit, John B.
If she's in, I'm out.
- I'm not doing this. I can't!
- You are gonna decide.
I'm very interested,
actually. Me or her?
Both.
- Ooh.
- Went for the Hail Mary.
Noooo!
It'll be cool, right?
I'm gonna leave.
- Sarah, don't.
- Gonna let y'all chat. Let me know.
I'd just like to say,
you handled that beautifully.
Dad?
Four, three, three, zero, zero. Okay.
Four, three okay
Shit! Come on.
Four, three, three
Okay! Yeah.
Okay, okay. Okay.
Checking the time?
Uh
Corpses cry too, you know.
Well, they secrete
fluid from their eyes.
Maybe not compare my
feelings to secretions?
Technically, it's discharge.
I'll stop talking now.
What're you doing?
Just
Uh I don't know.
Just be your usual weird self, okay?
I hate John B right now.
Look, it's just because
I know how this ends.
I've seen this movie.
I starred in it.
I mean, freshman year, it was my
first year at the Kook Academy.
You know how intimidating that is?
And one of these things is
obviously not like the other.
I mean, I didn't have anything
in common with anyone,
and just as I'm about to slit my wrists,
the queen asks me if I wanna
go save baby sea turtles.
Our first day together,
we walked to the beach.
We waited for the hatch,
and we kept the seagulls off
so that the turtles
could get to the water.
That actually sounds kinda nice.
It was the best day of my life.
And then she turned on me
like she does with everyone.
Look, I'm not doing this with her.
He's gonna have to choose.
You know he can't do that.
Why not?
Because he's an idiot.
If it were me I know who I'd choose.
What'd she say?
That you're an idiot.
- It's a no-brainer. You're picking Kie.
- Mm-mm.
Look, I can't make a decision.
So what? We're just dead in the
water because you're pussy-whipped?
We can't do this without
Kie, and you know it.
And I can't do it without Sarah.
Okay? They both have to be in on it.
Well, good luck with that.
You know what? I know this
was my fault, all right?
But it's our problem.
I've got a plan.
And you two shitheads
are gonna help me out.
Unusual style, isn't it?
Now check this out.
Holy shit!
It's Big John's glasses.
One of the four biggest cases
we had in the last year.
Big John Routledge, missin' person.
Scooter Grubbs drowns.
And two mainlanders dead
by homicide. Four things.
What I'm thinkin' is that
these four things
are all the same thing.
I swear.
I learned my lesson, okay?
Stay in the car.
You Barry?
Yeah. Who the hell are you?
My son owes you money.
- Who's your son?
- Rafe. My son Rafe owes you money.
So, uh
you must be the babysitter, huh?
Ohh!
Why'd you do that, huh?
'Cause if that's my money
right there, then
wanna put it in my hand?
That's not gonna happen.
I paid it, you pick it up.
All right.
Shit, though, man.
That boy 19 years old,
and you out here takin' care of him
like he just some little
baby-ass bitch, huh?
That's a damn shame.
But I'll take your money.
Ain't the first time
I told you to stay in the goddamn car.
Get your bike.
I'll pay you back.
No, Rafe.
You won't.
You know why you won't?
Because you're a liar.
And you're a thief.
And you cannot be trusted.
And I can't have you in my house, son.
Don't come home.
Where do you want me to go?
Dad!
Dad!
- Code red!
- What the hell is going on?
Okay, JJ and John B
conked out in the marsh.
They need a tow.
Uh, okay, well, what does
that have to do with me?
We need you for mechanical.
Mechanical.
John B and JJ are up in the Alp.
Can't you guys do anything without me?
What happened?
Uh, the alternator's, uh,
not alternating anymore.
- It's not charged.
- Did you check the plugs?
- No. No, you should check 'em.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Give it a whirl.
- You guys are useless.
- Sorry about that.
Come on, come on, come on!
- Uh is this a joke?
- Go, go, go, go!
- There are no plugs, like, at all.
- Sayonara!
- Shit.
- John B!
John B, let me out!
John John B!
- What? Wait.
- What the hell?
Guys!
- Ah!
- Are you serious?
Are you joking?
Get your asses back here!
We can't. Not till
you two figure it out.
- I will kill every single one of you!
- Y-You can't just leave!
There's food in the cabin,
and JJ rolled a blunt.
- Hydroponic!
- This is ridiculous.
Well, I would rather drown
than stay here with you, so
Fine, be my guest. Maybe
you'll finally shut the hell up.
You don't even know where you're going.
I don't care.
Good luck with the oyster beds.
- Wait!
- Godspeed!
Wait!
John B, you asshole!
They're not coming back for you!
Love you, guys! Bye!
Great.
What?
I got stung by a jellyfish! Shit!
- Ah!
- Dramatic.
Shit.
Well, you swam right into a man-o'-war.
Don't know what you
thought would happen.
Thanks for your help.
Ow.
Shit.
- Ow!
- Does it hurt?
Hey, Kiara. You know what they say
- No. Mm-mm.
- about curing jellyfish stings?
You have to pee on me.
I have a better idea.
- It's for the pain.
- JJ, bless.
Actually
Really?
Go easy.
It's JJ's cousin's Cripple.
Yeah.
Wow.
Hey, guess what?
Would you rather have
I was imagining you like this just now.
It was pretty funny.
Would you ima would you rather
have nipples for eyes
or eyes for nipples?
Imagine if you get really
old and your nipples
Your boobs get saggy, and your
nipples, if they were your eyes,
you could see if your shoes were untied.
Is this like your first time
smoking or something?
No.
Hey, Kiara
Oh, my God.
Enough of the "Hey, Kiara!" bullshit!
Why'd you do it?
Why did I do what?
We were best friends.
We we stole beers
from your dad's fridge,
we watched movies together,
we cried about boys.
And the next thing I know,
I'm watching your birthday
party happen from Instagram.
It was one party.
You invited everybody except me.
And then you told everybody
I was the reason
that the party got busted.
Okay, well, who else
would've called the cops?
You never asked.
You just let the rumor
go that I was a rat.
You were my best friend,
and then you ghosted me,
and I don't even know why!
I mean, really, what did I do?
You liked me.
What?
When people get
close to me,
I feel trapped.
And I bail.
And then I blame them for it.
I'm really sorry
and I miss you.
Do you think there's a chance
that we could be okay again?
Honestly
I don't know.
Hey, Sarah.
Hey, Kiara.
Promise me that you
won't bail on John B.
He's not just
some other guy.
And he really, really likes you.
I won't.
Promise me.
I promise.
Also, I'm sorry I called the cops.
I knew it.
I knew it, you bitch!
I told you!
You you should've invited me.
So you called the cops?
Yes!
Uh-oh!
- You forget your keys or something?
- You need a tow?
Don't give them the satisfaction
of thinking this worked.
- Absolutely not.
- You gotta admit it was funny.
- John B.
- Uh, what's that?
- Mastermind, huh?
- I'm always plannin'.
- Some patriarchal bullshit.
- Yeah, that sucked.
You still love us though, right?
Here.
- Yeah, whatever.
- Hey, you still hate me?
A little. We're both gonna get you
back when you least expect it.
- Watch your back, boys.
- Mm-hm.
- I welcome that challenge.
- Me too.
So, did you guys, you know
Reconcile our differences?
- Mm-mm.
- Not even close.
- But we're willing to work together.
- Mm.
You know what?
- That's victory.
- Yep.
Wiggedy-wiggedy-wiggedy!
- Know why? Hydroponic.
- Don't say that.
All right, shut up. You guys
ready to jack someone up?
- Yeah, whatever.
- Yep.
In the boat.
Let's get it.
- You got rope?
- Got it.
- Grappling hook?
- No grappling hook.
We're not Batman.
- Pulley?
- Check.
Dark clothes?
- Got it.
- Flashlights?
- Check.
- All right, good.
- We're ready.
- Let's go.
Let's go get rich, guys.
Yeah. Hell, yeah.
- Go, boys.
- And girls.
- Let's go.
- Let's roll.
- Right on.
- Wait, wait
I wanna say thank you, guys. Seriously.
It means a lot to me that
you're here tonight.
Always.
Of course, man.
My man.
All right, we done with the circle
jerk? Can we go do this?
Yeah.
Let's get that wheat in the water.
- Weed? I'm up for weed.
- Wheat. I said wheat.
- After you.
- Ladies first.
Alley-oop.
- Shit!
- Oh, shit!
- Go, go, go, go.
- Flashlights!
- It's on strobe!
- Flashlights.
Shh!
Okay
Okay, so she has motion sensor lights.
We could, uh move
really slowly, maybe?
- What?
- That's not how it works.
- Oh, shit. Let's throw a rock at it.
- What?
That's a really good idea. Let the
axe murderer know that we're here.
- Throw a rock at it?
- You have a better idea?
Literally anything but that.
What about the breaker?
In the circuit box on the porch.
We used to play
hide-and-seek here as kids.
And if we were brave enough,
we'd go all the way up to the porch.
I've seen it.
No, no. You're not going
in the house alone.
- Watch me.
- Crain chops people into pieces.
If you believe that,
but she's like what, 85?
- Yeah, somethin' like that.
- She's probably barely still kicking.
Here. I'll go with you.
- Yeah.
- We'll wait for your signal.
- Okay, cool.
- Hey! Be safe.
We will.
- Be safe.
- I'll be so safe.
- I'll be safe for you.
- Can you guys stop? Stop!
I'm gonna kill you.
But how would that keep us safe?
She must have a generator plugged
into the main power supply.
Shh
Where are the breakers?
- What is this?
- No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Shit.
It goes inside.
They said when Hollis disappeared
That you should shut the eff up!
Hey.
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah.
Oh.
- All right.
- Okay.
They did it. Go time.
So, let's do it.
Three, two
Just just just go.
Holy crap, you know what this is?
It just hit me.
Pope, look.
This is C.H.U.D. Full C.H.U.D.
What is he talking about?
Cannibalistic humanoid
underground dwellers?
Have you guys not seen that film?
- No.
- Can't say I have, no.
It's actually a good film.
It's about cannibals
that live in the sewers
and under New York
City, and it's like
Shut up! Shut up!
All right. How deep do
you think this is, Pope?
I don't know.
Shit.
Hey, boys. I have one request.
- Yeah?
- Yeah?
Don't drop me.
- Whoa!
- Okay
- You're gonna die first, for sure.
- Got ya.
All right, just keep payin' it
out nice and slow like that.
Here we go. Keep goin'.
Keep goin'.
Wait, hold on one second.
I'm gonna get situated.
You good?
Oh, my
- Oh, shit! John, shit!
- Whoa! What
Jesus!
- John B!
- I told you not to drop me!
- You good, man?
- What the hell was that?
Little technical difficulties.
Keep going, slow!
Okay, we're gonna start paying
you out again, all right?
Shit.
Okay. Okay. All right, keep goin'.
All right. Keep it comin'.
Okay.
Hey. Hey, we got 15 feet left.
- Are you getting close to the bottom?
- I can't tell.
- Just just keep goin'.
- Give me more.
Yeah
Whoa! Stop!
I'm hangin' over some
sewage-water lookin' shit.
You want back up?
Keep goin', I guess
Nice and slow.
Here we go.
Okay.
Oh.
Okay, okay! I'm at bottom.
How is it down there?
It's worse than I thought.
It's it's late, Leon.
Too late.
- You find any gold?
- Uh, nothin' yet.
Wait.
I think I felt something with my foot.
Here goes nothin'.
Mr. Crain.
JJ! Hey, pull me up!
- Pull me up!
- Pull him up!
- Come on, man! Go!
- Come on, pull him up!
Go! Come on! Pull me up!
Come on! Pull me up! Pull me up!
Come on!
Shit!
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! Wait!
Hey, I think I found something.
Hey, John B!
What'd you say?
Just give me a minute. Hold on.
Okay. Okay.
Hm.
I can hear you, Leon.
I've been waiting all night!
Go!
Go! Go!
- Leon!
- Shit!
- Shit!
- Where are you, Leon?
Huh?
Come on
John B, you okay?
Any dead bodies?
Shit
We did it, Dad.
Oh!
Oh! Oh!
Okay
- Come on, this way!
- Okay.
Okay.
Shit!
This way! It goes underneath the house!
- Go, go, go, go!
- I'm trying!
- Go!
- Guys!
- Guys!
- Guys!
- What's going on?
- Mrs. Crain! She's up there!
She tried to kill us with a fire poker.
- We gotta go.
- We locked her in the parlor,
- but we gotta go.
- Okay, code red.
- We have to go!
- Let's go. John B! Get back on, man!
- Hey!
- JJ!
Hold on, man! I'm comin'!
- Come on!
- Three, two, one, pull!
- Jeez.
- Shit!
- Where the hell is he?
- Shit.
- Sh! Sh!
- John B!
- Hey!
- Guys. Sh!
I found the gold!
What's he saying?
JJ! Pope! Kie!
Yo, he's drowning!
- We gotta pull him up!
- John B!
Hey, John B! Get back on the rope.
We're gonna pull you
back up, okay, buddy?
Come on!
- Come on! Pull!
- Come on.
- Okay, everybody, help!
- Guys!
Okay, I'm on!
- Guys!
- Yeah! Yeah!
- Okay.
- Let's go.
Come on!
Pull!
- Shit!
- Jesus!
- Shit!
- Shit! Hang on!
Pope! JJ! What the hell?
Climb up!
- Help me! Hang on!
- Tie it up now, man!
Pope, hide!
Go! Go!
- She can't aim for shit.
- She can't see.
She's blind.
Shit! Go!
Go, Sarah!
Go! Go!
- Go! Go!
- I don't care if she is, that's buckshot!
Whoo!
JJ! Pope! Kie! Yeah!
Can we go now?
- Get into the car!
- Come on!
- Get to the car!
- Go! Go!
- Where is he?
- Come on, start the car. Go!
John B!
Why are we always getting shot at?
Come on! John B, run!
- Come on! Come on!
- Wait! Wait, wait, wait, wait!
- Get in!
- Wait!
- Whoa!
- Oh, shit!
- Oh, my God!
- Shit!
- JJ, drive!
- Go, man!
- Oh, my God!
- God!
- Are you okay? Are you shot?
- No.
- You good?
- Yeah, yeah.
I think I'd know if I was shot, right?
You look disgusting.
- God, you smell like ass.
- What the hell just happened?
All-time Pogue Hall of Fame, baby.
Hell, yeah.
- That bitch is possessed.
- That bitch can't aim.
- How does she move that fast?
- She's possessed.
- I don't get it.
- She's blind.
- Like Master Yoda.
- Dunno.
- It makes no sense, scientifically.
- She does yoga. Pilates.
- Oh, God!
- Oh, my God!
- What is that?
- No, you didn't!
- We did it, baby!
- No, you didn't!
- I did it!
- Oh, my God!
- I did it!
- Oh, my God!
I did it!
- Holy shit! Holy shit!
- Whoo-hoo-hoo!
Whoo!
That's gold!
Wait! Wait!
- Holy shit!
- Guys, we're gonna be rich!
- Full Kook!
- Like Kook rich.
Full Kook! Full Kook!
Full Kook! Full Kook!
Full Kook! Full Kook! Ay-ay-ay!
- Ay-ay-ay!
- Oh!
Whoo-hoo-hoo!
- A lot of gold.
- Oh, my God.