Shifting Gears (2025) s01e06 Episode Script

1
You need a Valentine's goody
bag for every kid in the class?
My teacher says no one
should feel left out.
She doesn't want the nerds
to be reminded they're nerds.
That's very sweet. It's like
affirmative action for dorks.
It's about time we got some action.
Hey, Carter, help me with something.
You're in the robotics club, right?
But somehow the coat hook
is just too advanced for you?
Yeah, kids. You know
jackets go on the couch.
Ooh. Where you going all done up?
I got a thing.
What thing?
A thing.
He's not gonna tell us.
We can go on his phone
later. His password is 1776.
- It's a lady. Up top, Pops.
- Ha-ha.
It's Valentine's Day. I'm
gonna go see your grandma.
Oh, boy.
Pops, Grandma's dead.
No way. Somebody should've told me.
I love that you're visiting Mom
today, but I have to go to work,
and I was hoping you
could watch the kids.
You say "the kids." They're
not my kids. They're your kids.
My kids are grown up and barely
surviving. This isn't my job, honey.
Mom, I can watch Georgia.
I mean, I'm 15. It's time I learn
to be the man of the house anyway.
You seen how much bacon he eats?
Are you sure? I'll be gone all day.
And it's not like back in Vegas
where fat Elvis would
keep an eye on you.
This is a really safe neighborhood.
The only homeless people are
right here in this living room.
Oh, hey, uh, sorry I'm late.
You know, I wanted to get here earlier,
but you know Riley. "Blah, blah, blah."
Couldn't get out of the house.
But you're probably busy, though,
playing bocce ball with
Saint Peter, you know.
Having a meal with Gandhi, finally.
Excuse me.
I think you're talking
to my husband, Raymond.
No, Raymond's over there.
I'm talking to my wife, Diane.
Oh. Phew!
I don't know, I saw
some guy with flowers.
I started to wonder if Ray
didn't tell me everything.
Hmm.
Any idea how much longer you need?
Well, it's my dead wife.
It's not a treadmill.
- But if you're in a hurry, I supp
- Oh, thanks so much.
Diane, I bet you got some stories.
Oh. Thank God you're both here.
- You okay?
- My boss at the dance studio
wants to make a video of all the
employees dancing for social media.
So, what's the problem?
If I could dance, I would have
made way more money in Vegas.
Yeah, in fourth grade,
she got kicked out of the
school production of Oklahoma!
Only white girl asked to leave Oklahoma.
Well, I am just gonna hide in here,
and everyone will forget I exist.
It's worked so far with
the bill collectors.
Well, you know what else
works? Paying your damn bills.
Riley, I'm gonna teach
you some dance moves.
I need some music. Stitch.
That's it. Okay, there we go. You ready?
First move, Checking the Oil,
and it starts with the hips.
Check the oil. Check that oil.
Check the oil. Check that oil.
Check the oil. Check that oil.
Okay. Next move.
If you wanna go with
something a little softer,
we go with Change the Tire.
And it starts with the hips.
We go low. We go low.
Then we change the tire. Change
that tire. Change the tire.
Change that tire. Change the tire.
- Change that tire. Change the tire.
- And God took my legs?
Hey, uh, what are you doing?
You're supposed to be
putting candy into the bags.
I don't consider Maisey
peanut-butter-cup worthy.
Uh, and you're not
supposed to be eating those.
You're not the boss of me.
Uh, Mom left me in charge.
Plus, I'm older than you. I'm
bigger than you. I'm smarter
I'm bigger than you.
Oh. I see what this is about.
- You wanna wet your beak.
- What?
Here you go.
Don't you have, like, a
bike to ride or something?
Eucalyptus?
Yeah, it always brought Ray peace.
Always brought me an allergy attack.
Oh, gosh. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry. I-I-I
should have asked first.
Well, at least if I die
I'm close to home.
Ah, I see Diane is gonna
spend eternity on top.
Too soon?
Do you ever not say the first
thing that comes into your mind?
Hey, look, you don't exactly scream
"maybe I should keep
that hot take to myself."
- I keep a lot of stuff to myself. I do.
- Okay.
Some stuff.
A few things.
- People are idiots. What can I say?
- Mmm. Hmm.
Yeah, no, they-they-they
really are.
Thanks for letting me have
some time alone with her.
She loved Valentine's Day.
Ray loved Valentine's Day too.
Yeah, he wrote me poems.
He gave me flowers.
I mean, he wanted something
else, but he hid it well.
I don't get here as much as I should.
Well, how long has it been?
Oh Be about a little over a year now.
Ah. So you're still in it.
Yeah, I mean, it's
been five years for me.
And don't worry, it-it does get
easier to move on eventually.
I find that hard to believe.
Have you tried any support groups?
Did my daughter send you?
She's got opinions about
Well, she's got opinions
about everything really.
Well, there are some
really good ones out there.
I can I can send you a link.
I'm not into support groups or any
groups with, um, people in them.
Huh.
Well, um, another thing
that helped me move on
is just getting back out there.
Have you started trying to
connect with someone new?
I'm not ready for that.
Oh. Yeah. Right. Well,
it involves people.
Well, when you are ready,
you know Olsen's Food Market
in the in the Arts District?
- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah?
Well, it's a great place
to meet older singles.
Well, I've been there.
That would explain why that
woman wanted me to bend over
to pick up something on the lower shelf.
Yeah. I gotta try that.
Uh, I go there quite a bit to,
uh, to, you know, mmm, shop.
- Ooh, excuse me.
- Yeah.
Uh
- What What's so funny?
- Ah, that's funny.
My granddaughter just
puked on my grandson
- Ugh.
- but he's just
It's probably not that funny,
really. I probably should go.
Um, listen, um
This little support group wasn't bad.
Well, I could text you
some info on a real one
in case you change your mind.
Here.
There you go.
I changed my mind once in the
'70s. I didn't like it then, so
Yeah.
Is she gonna make it?
It's candy, not Ebola.
How did you eat so much candy?
It's a gift.
And a curse.
- Uh-oh, Grandpa.
- Hold, hold it, hold, hold.
Garbage, garbage, garbage,
garbage, garbage, garbage.
Watch out, watch out,
watch out. Hair. There.
All right. Okay.
Solid hair-holding technique.
Used to it. Your mom
used to love keggers.
- Okay.
- All right.
I think I got all the evil out.
- Yeah, you did.
- I'm gonna go lay down.
- Okay. Rinse your mouth out, all right?
- Mm-hmm.
And lay down, cover up, and
I'll be right up there, okay?
We gotta let your mom
know that she's sick.
Or do we?
We do.
Oh, I see what you're doing.
You wanna wet your beak.
You're a very strange kid.
It's just, she got sick
while Mom left me in charge.
Mom's gonna be really pissed.
Most likely, yeah.
That's part of growing up, kid.
You gotta be responsible
for the stuff you do.
Like when you dropped me when I
was five and told Grandma I tripped?
Wow. The fact that you remember that
says I didn't drop you hard enough.
- I'm a devil wearing Prada ♪
- Nope.
Nope.
These girls weren't
built for dancing. Okay?
God clearly built me to
carry overflowing beer steins
during medieval happy hour, not dance.
Dancing is like life, okay? You just
You just trust that it'll work
out, you get lost in the moment,
and then you dance
like nobody's watching.
It's going on social media.
Literally everyone is watching.
My life is already a disaster.
I can't become a meme.
What happened to the old Riley
who was never scared to get
outside of her comfort zone?
She got knocked up, went broke,
was dragged back to this hellhole.
Oh, it's nice to know you miss us too.
You-You can't lose your
fearless side, okay?
It's who you are.
Listen, whatever happens,
just know the people that matter
will always have your back.
Well, when you say all that, I
kind of have to give it another try.
Oh. I can't do the dance.
I have to leave because
Georgia's puking.
Which is obviously terrible.
I texted your mom, so you're
safe until she gets home.
Oh, Charlotte.
So it was a lady.
My man.
You know, it's not polite to spy
on people when they're texting.
Your font's so big, they can read it
from one of those government
drones you're always talking about.
And just so you know,
you have my blessing.
Don't need it and don't want it.
She sent quite a few messages.
She's a friend. That's what friends do.
They send texts and a lot of texts.
You know, if you had
any friends, you'd know.
I'm not gonna lie.
Love how close we're getting.
- Hey, hey.
- Hey.
How's Georgia?
Oh, uh, she's she's better.
She's sleeping right
now, and just to be safe,
I put crucifixes in all
four corners of her room.
I'm gonna check on her real quick,
and then I have to pick
up her nausea medicine.
Why don't you just stay
with her? I'll go get it.
Thank you. It's at Olsen's.
Huh?
Our Olsen's?
No, the Olsen's in New Jersey.
You have a flight in two hours.
I'll go get it.
- I'll be right back.
- Wait, hang on.
Aren't you banned from Olsen's
after the ham-weighing incident?
The butcher had his
fat thumb on the scale.
I know my honey-baked.
Full pound, my ass.
Yeah, Riley, I'm in the café
because apparently it's
gonna be 45 minutes
45 minutes!
until I get the
prescription because, obviously,
it takes a long time to put 12 pills
from one bottle to the next bottle!
Anyway, call me when you get this.
Oh, it's Dad.
Hey, Matt.
Hey, Charlotte.
I, uh, recognized your irritated
tone from across the store.
This is kind of random.
Not really. I told you I come here.
Do I look like the kind of
guy that listens to people?
I'm just here getting
medicine for my granddaughter.
Ah, yeah, sure, sure,
sure. Whatever you say.
Uh
So you decided to do
a little shopping, huh?
No, I'm not shopping.
I'm just waiting for a cup of coffee
because apparently the
medication's gonna take
Forty-five minutes!
Yeah, I got that part. I'm
pretty sure the whole store did.
Okay. Well, anyway, I'm waiting for
some coffee. Do you wanna join me?
Oh. Uh, s
Yeah. I-I'd like that.
- Oh, good.
- Yeah.
Uh
By the way, I, uh, I already scoped
the whole store for silver foxes,
and it's pretty slim pickings.
But I did try that move
where you, uh, ask somebody to bend over
and pick something up
from the lower shelf,
and, uh, unfortunately he fell over.
I think he's still back there.
I'm never eating candy again.
Not so great on the way back up, huh?
The worst.
Remember that when someone offers
you something called jungle juice.
You know better than
to eat that much candy.
Just because it's easy to trick
your brother doesn't mean you should.
Uh, she didn't trick me, Mom.
I'm actually more
aware than people think.
Your shirt is inside out.
The point is,
I let Georgia eat the
candy, and I let you down,
so send any punishments my way.
There's no punishment.
Oh, boy.
Grandpa left me a voicemail.
I'm gonna need some jungle juice.
Why'd you cover for me?
Because I'm your big brother.
That's my job.
Thanks.
Sorry I puked in your room.
You didn't puke in my room.
And I'm sorry I didn't tell you.
The first Valentine's with Diane,
I decided to take her to one of
those high-end French restaurants.
I can't remember the name of it.
All I remember was they had
a like, a waiter, kind of,
with a bow tie in the bathroom
handing out towels and mints.
I-I don't need a guy as an
audience in the bathroom.
All right, all right. You're
going on a tangent. Just
Oh, yeah. I tend to do that.
That's part of my charm.
If you say so.
Anyway, when the waiter
gets to the table,
the menu items were actually more money
than the rent I was paying at the time.
I was, like, panicking.
And so I ordered the
cheapest thing on the menu,
which was corkage fee.
But I called it "corkage
fay." Said it like that. So
Wow. Ooh, it's like
I'm actually in Paris.
Yeah.
Well, I would have pretended to
go to the bathroom and just left.
She didn't do that.
Right away, she just said,
"You know, I don't really
like wine that much.
I wonder if they have beer."
And I said, "I'm not
letting this one go."
I love that.
Yeah, thanks for sharing.
Yeah, my last Valentine's
Day, we went to karaoke,
and, um, I learned that
whiskey plus Johnny Cash
leads to a grown man weeping.
Oh. Very common.
- Very common.
- Yeah.
Was that a previous thing,
or did you meet somebody here?
- Oh, here. Yeah.
- Here?
We dated for almost two years.
Two years?
I can't imagine dating again,
and not just because I
think Diane would haunt me.
Look, I I get that,
and I was the same way.
But at some point, I did
connect with someone new,
and I realized that moving forward,
it didn't mean that I was
leaving someone behind.
Was that on a Hallmark card?
T-shirt in Mexico.
I appreciate you saying
that. I appreciate that.
Oh, good. Prescription
is ready for pickup.
Thank you!
Well, this has been actually nice.
Unusual for me to meet somebody
that isn't immediately annoying.
Uh
Look, I, um
Happy to chat anytime.
Yeah. Hmm.
- Yeah.
- Hey. Okay.
Thanks. I just didn't, uh
I don't want to give you
the wrong impression here.
No, no, no. Don't worry.
Look, you're great, but, uh
something about you reminds
me of the last man I was with.
You're a good brother.
You didn't have to take
the hit for your sister.
I was just trying to do
what I thought you would do.
Have you seen where that's gotten me?
Stop. Mom, I-I'm serious.
You're the coolest person I know.
Well, that's funny. Because you
are the coolest person I know.
Gabe, what are you doing here?
Well, I knew you had a tough day,
so I brought chicken soup for Georgia,
some pizza for you,
and my favorite for me,
wagon wheel butter pasta.
Well, thank you.
Sorry I just ran out.
Please. You didn't run. You skipped.
That was the closest you got to dancing.
Fine. I was overjoyed.
But tomorrow is the last dance video,
and I gotta go in and be a part of it.
Oh. So Old Gabe did have an effect, huh?
It's what I call myself
when I say something wise.
Old Gabe.
As much as I appreciated
your encouragement,
it was actually Carter.
Carter's got better moves than me?
Dance-off. Now.
He did something I know
he was scared to do,
and he said I inspired him to do it.
I just wanna be the
person he thinks I am.
Hey, now that the dance is back
on, I got another move for you.
I call it the Martini-Shake Stank Face.
And it starts with the hips.
And then you go for the shake.
Shake.
Now the stank face. Mm-hmm.
Oh, no.
Yeah, that's it. That's the stank face.
That's it. Stank face.
- Hey.
- Hey there.
Well, I got Georgia's prescription.
She pukes just like her mother.
- Is she okay?
- Yeah.
Sorry the pharmacy took so long.
I hope it wasn't too annoying.
Hey, uh, this morning when
I went to see your mom,
I met this interesting woman.
Tell me you didn't pick
up a date at Mom's grave.
No, no. She was just a real nice person,
and she had lost her husband, and she
she kinda helped me sort
things out a little bit.
That's great.
Who knew talking to someone could help?
Sorry, it's just such a
good told-you-so moment.
Anyway, I saw her at
the grocery store again.
Wow. And as I was driving
home, I felt really, uh, guilty.
- Why?
- Talking to a woman, you know,
I felt like I was, uh, betraying
your mom somewhat, you know?
Dad, Mom would want you to find peace
and as close to happiness as
someone like you can muster.
Maybe meeting that lady was what
you needed to help you move on.
Mom would have said there are no
Coincidences.
She said that a lot, didn't she?
I'm not really ready to
date or anything like that,
but I wonder if that might change.
And how would you feel about that?
I'm here, and I'm happy to talk.
Unless it's about you bumping uglies.
Then, please, God, never mention a word.
I don't think I'd call it ugly.
I'm a devil wearing Prada ♪
They call me Meryl Chic ♪
Shouldn't we get back to work?
Flaming hot, Taki cheeto ♪
Call me Chester the Cheat ♪
I throw a punch ♪
Like Muhammad Ali ♪
I'ma hit 'em with a jab ♪
Left hook, right hook ♪
Put 'em in a bag ♪
I'ma hit 'em with a jab ♪
Left hook, right hook ♪
Put 'em in a bag ♪
Sick.
That would be an understatement.
Damn, girl. You a meme already.