Sick Note (2017) s01e06 Episode Script

We all loved Ash, deeply.
He didn't deserve to be the victim of a hit-and-run.
He didn't deserve to be in a coma nor have locked-in syndrome.
And he certainly didn't deserve to have his feeding tube and his IV tube swapped over.
If If there is a god up there I just hope he had a good reason to let Ash's bloodstream fill with hot cream of chicken soup.
Uh, as his best friend I just have to remind myself it was painless.
And now one of Ash's favorite songs.
Amen.
- Tragic loss.
- Daniel! Ash is dead! He was your best friend! Your only friend.
Yeah, I know, I'm pretty cut up about it.
I know grief affects people differently but you're being weird.
Can you see that? What? There was a a thing over there.
By the tree.
Isn't that your doctor? Hello, Daniel! Hello, Becca! - Uh - Lovely day! - What are you doing here? - Oh I thought I'd pay my final respects to Andy.
- Ash.
- Well, no, no.
Not yet, they have to heat the body up to a very high temperature and then they grind the bones into a fine powder.
His name is Ash.
Yes, yes, of course.
Remind me how you know him? Right, well, I only really got to know him after he was hit by that, uh, that car.
- Well, he was in the coma then.
- Yeah, just a lovely guy.
- We should comfort Vanessa.
- Hm-mm.
- Goodbye, Dr Glennis.
- Yes, I was hoping It was a beautiful service.
Thanks again for offering to pay for it.
It was the least I could do.
Here's the invoice.
Thanks again.
I don't know what we'd have done without you.
Wow! It's amazing how much a casket costs considering you burn it.
It was very generous of you.
Uh, see you back at our my place.
It's basically all the money from We Cover.
- I'll have nothing left.
- You did a good thing.
- You should be proud of yourself.
- Daniel! Daniel Glass? Sorry to intrude on such a sad day.
I knew you'd be here.
I wanted to ask you something.
Sure.
Oh, sorry, I'll just I'll just go.
I'm trying to get to the bottom of how his feeding tube got attached to his blood supply.
I don't think it was an accident.
Oh really? Something doesn't add up.
Did you see anything suspicious at the hospital during his last days? Uh - You were gonna murder him! - I wasn't, I promise! Not off the top of my head.
If anything comes back to you, no matter how seemingly small, - call me.
- Yeah, of course.
I did everything I could to protect Mr.
Matthews.
When I was called away by my superiors, he was killed.
Now they're trying to silence me.
I I promise I'll call if anything comes to mind.
Please do.
But only speak to me.
I can't trust my colleagues right now.
How's he doing? They were inseparable.
Ash was always out meeting Daniel, three or four nights a week.
Uh Yeah, I mean, he's he's numb right now.
I don't think he's processed it.
Come upstairs, I've got something for him.
You should have it.
I haven't been able to sleep in here yet.
Been staying at Mum and Dad's.
This is the side he slept on? Oh, I can still smell him.
He always smelled of you know, food.
Like he'd just had a burger.
Ash would want Daniel to have this.
He treasured it.
It's from Game of Thrones.
- Limited edition.
- I can't believe this is happening.
It's the worst feeling.
I don't think it'll ever end.
Sweet, lovely Ash, just gone.
My poor baby! Vanessa, it's gonna be OK.
- Shit.
- What the hell? Sorry, I I misread a signal.
Ash Is that you, you prick? Oh! Shit.
Come round the back.
What? Come on.
I don't know what you're thinking I'm thinking you killed Ash! - That's what I'm thinking.
- Poppycock! Why on Earth would I?! I saw you with a pillow! You were gonna finish him off! I may have a few deaths to my name but they were all patients.
I am not a murderer! Very clever, how'd you do that? You gave me fucking chemo last week! Yes.
Yes, I'm sorry about that.
Daniel, what did you tell Officer Haywood? Daniel, listen to me, I am not a killer! Yes, you are! And I never want to see you again.
- Ha! Hellooo! - What about Vanessa? She doesn't need us right now.
Come on.
I'll see you Tuesday for your next chemotherapy, Daniel.
Have you cleaned this? That policeman thinks Ash's death is suspicious.
What do you think? Could you stop playing with Will5000 and talk to me? I'm not playing with Will5000.
He's been offline all week.
Did you hear what I said? About Ashley's death being suspicious? Yeah, yeah, you know, I've read up on it.
This kind of thing happens more often than you think.
People dying from having soup being injected into their bloodstream? Well, yeah, I mean, it's happened three times.
That policeman said protecting him was of national importance.
- Oh, really? - Hm.
When When did he tell you that? Uh Well, no, no, it it must have been when you were when you were out of the room.
Hm Hm How did this happen? - What? - Well, come and look.
Oh, yeah, must have been the wind.
Or a squirrel.
You know, they they do get up there.
A squirrel pulled the pipe off the wall? Yeah.
Yeah, they're they're tough little things.
Don't worry, I'll call someone in the morning, get it fixed.
Where the fuck are you, Will? Oh You got me! - I have got you all day, all to myself.
- What's What's going on? Mr.
West wants me to work out an appearance schedule with you.
Now that you're on the We Cover posters, they want you at public events, fundraisers you might also be on Loose Women! Although Mr.
West said one of the hosts was mad at him for something, so maybe not.
Can I ask you a hypothetical question? You can ask me any kind of question! OK, so, say you had a big secret.
A lie.
Uh, like, what if you didn't invent Shower Gel Warmer, someone else did and you and you stole it? But I didn't steal it.
OK, so what if you said that there was a scientific report that said warmer shower gel helps people live longer but you knew you made it up? - Would you feel guilty? - But there is a report.
It's part of my pitch.
OK, what if the shower gel fell in the shower, cracked open and you put it in the road and said a car ran over it? Are you OK? No, I'm I'm really tired.
She defines the term "loose"! You don't wanna know what that bitch gets up to! Well, um, This Morning is still keen.
- You haven't upset any of them, have you? - No, no, no.
Schofield and I watched them tear down the Berlin Wall together with some East German hookers.
But please can you Don't talk about prostitutes, OK? We're trying to fix our public image after this disaster.
I didn't put the photograph up, Donald J.
Trump Jr.
did! I couldn't stop him! Yes, well, it's given us a lot of bad publicity, OK? Well, good morning, Daniel.
You decided to come to work today! Hey, Daniel.
Um, is is everything OK? Not really.
You heard about my friend? Oh, yeah, well he's shit out of luck.
Yeah, anyway I've had a really tough time, you know I'm going to need you to cut back on some of my public appearance stuff.
Of course.
You've had a tough week.
We need to cut you some slack.
You got cancer, you lost your friend You need a break.
Yeah - Yeah, I I really do.
- Hm.
- Thanks Thanks, Mr.
West.
- No problem, really.
Just make sure you get the company banking details and get that 30 grand back in the account before the end of the day.
Hm? What's the matter, champ? Ah? Trying to worm your way out of your fucking responsibilities? Yes, I'd normally be with you on this, Daniel, but, um, We Cover is in the midst of a social media firestorm.
Mr.
West has regrettably been tagged in this photo.
Oh Is Is that a giraffe? It's an albino giraffe! That's rarer than tits on a gymnast.
So, we are going to need you more than ever to help fix our public image.
So, to show you what a great boss I am, go home, have a good cry and then come back tomorrow, ready to hit the We Cover campaign trail.
Now fuck off.
How could anyone find that offensive? You're through to 07 70 09 00 843 the telephone of Dr Iain Glennis.
I'm not available to talk right now, but you can leave a message on this answering service.
I'm I'm going to the police.
There you are.
- I can't believe you remembered.
- Oh Well, I saw it in a shop window and it looked a lot like the one that I I broke.
I love it.
Look, I'm I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I've been a bit up and down lately.
But the good news is my doctor's changed my medication and she thinks it will - level me out.
- Oh Come here.
Oh.
Don't move, don't move.
Sorry, I Oh I've got I have to listen to this.
I'm going to the police.
I can't do this anymore.
I'm telling them everything, about the cancer, about Ash, everything.
Thought I'd give you a heads-up in case you want to leave the country or kill yourself.
Goodbye.
Sorry.
I just need to pop out for a moment, my love.
- Take Snuffles? - Uh No.
No, I can't, I'm afraid.
- It's - I'll take him to the garden.
Come on, Snuffles, come on! Let's go.
Daniel! This is Dr Iain Glennis.
Whatever you're about to do, I insist that you stop! I mean it! If you go through with this I'll tell them you murdered your friend! You'll go to prison for life, Daniel! Argh! Ah Officer Haywood, please.
Hi! Can I come in? Well, that depends.
Are you going to try and finger me? No, I I want to apologize about that.
Hm.
What I did, it was a reaction to all the grief, it wasn't me.
Let's just forget about it.
You people react to stuff in odd ways.
When Ash found out that Daniel was ill, he used to disappear a lot at night.
Right.
Come to think of it, he did that a lot before Daniel got sick.
Oh! Oh Benny's filled his nappy.
Smells like a sewer.
- Won't be long.
- OK I love you, Ash.
I'll never forget you.
Oh! I can't believe that's you in there.
Your eyes your hands your dick.
Sorry, I I I just wanted to see what it looked like.
Back.
I'm glad you called.
This case has taken some very unexpected turns.
As you know, Mr.
Matthews worked for the tax office.
MI5 often recruit from other government departments.
OK Take a look at this.
Uh, KGB.
The only letters Mr.
Matthews would communicate while he was locked in.
A message he was trying very hard to deliver about his killers.
So, you think Ash was killed by the KGB? Yes! The hit-and-run didn't kill him so they finished the job.
Murdered by spies.
They didn't believe it about Litvinenko, either.
Do you know what maybe you're not the best person to talk to.
Right now, I'm the only person here you can trust, Mr.
Glass.
Ash was sleeping with my girlfriend.
Does Miss Palmerstone have a connection to Russia you're aware of? No.
She loved him, I think.
I'm sorry.
Go on.
Not now! You're going to want to hear this.
A nurse has just confessed.
- What? - She made a statement half an hour ago.
They're faxing it through now.
No, no, no, this this does not fit.
She worked three shifts, could barely see straight, plugged the wrong tube into the wrong socket.
- It was an accident.
- No, Mr.
Matthews was murdered.
No.
He wasn't.
So it wasn't the KGB, then.
No.
It would appear not.
Shit! Sorry.
I I thought this was a big case, you know? Yeah.
Selena? Is that one of your Russian spies? I'm just glad you found out how Ash was killed so that's He's a fucking liar! Whatever he's said about me isn't true.
Andy was sleeping with his girlfriend.
There was no hit-and-run! No, no, no! It's fine! I know you didn't do it.
- Andy? Who's Andy? - A-A-Andy Thingamajig.
He fell from the window, and then Daniel made me put him in the boot.
- Ah! - What're you doing?! All units, we have a situation in the reception area.
It was the nurse, she confessed! The nurse killed him! It was the nurse! Hey, now! Ah! Ah, you're hurting me! The doctor's not pressing charges.
We're letting you off with a caution.
Thanks, and, uh sorry again.
- What's the deal with you two? - Dr Glennis is treating my cancer.
And he also slept with my girlfriend.
Huh.
That's why I hit him.
You really do need to get out of that relationship.
Yeah.
Yeah.
I plan to.
You were definitely thinking about killing him.
I was not! But, look, I I understand why you may have thought that that I was.
I'm I'm sorry.
Oh, well thank thank thank you.
It means a lot, thank you.
Let's put all this behind us You know, Andy, uh Ash.
Yeah.
Bless his soul.
He can't put the finger of blame on us and we've got nothing to fear.
Yeah Or I'm being stalked by a fucking ghost.
- I'm sorry, what? - Nothing.
The case is closed now.
There's, uh There's no one left who knows our secret.
It'll be fine.
It'll be fine.
Four grand out of 30.
Fuck's sake, Ash.
I'm going to bed.
Oh.
Night.
Are you coming? No, no, I'm a bit busy.
Gotta catch up on some emails.
OK.
Asshole.
- Who's that? - How the fuck should I know? Oh, fuck! Who are you? What the fuck do you want? Ash? Dude! It's Will5000.
I'm moving in!