Welcome to Chippendales (2022) s01e06 Episode Script

February 31st

1
You know that printing
pressthat makes our calendars?
I bought it! I have big plans
for the calendars.
We're being sued
for racially discriminatory practices.
This guy says that we turned
him away for not having a VIP card.
It's not true. Are you serious?
There are no VIP cards.
They do not exist.
I don't know which is worse,
what you did or the fact
that you lied about it!
Chippendales is gonna be
on The Phil Donahue Show.
Please welcome Mr. Chippendales
himself, Mr. Nick De Noia.
I forbid you from going
on national television
to take credit for my creation.
- Is that what I'm doing, Steve?
- I'm stealing credit?
That is exactly what you are doing!
You wanna see taking credit, asshole?
I will show you taking credit.
You know, most parents
would be extremely proud of me.
I've made it.
She said she wants a man ♪
To always understand ♪
But that's all right for her ♪
Still, I don't care
if he's young or old ♪
Whoa!
I just want someone I can hold on to ♪
I want muscles ♪
Muscles, muscles ♪
I'm gonna go check on Brooke and Calvin.
Oh, I can't wait to hear all about it.
- I love you.
- I love you!
Wow. Well, we're officially idiots.
Well, you said it.
Maybe next time, fellas, maybe.
Sage!
- Hi!
- I told you.
- What do you think?
- Bravo.
- Ah, you're too kind.
- Oh, my God, that was so good.
Oh, thank you, sweetheart. Mwah.
Nick De Noia, you have
outdone yourself yet again.
Well, if you like that,
wait till you see
what I cooked up for the closer.
- You ain't seeing nothing yet.
- Well done!
Keep it up and I might have
to give you a pay raise.
Let me think about it.
- Steve Banerjee.
- Calvin Klein.
I'm a great admirer of your
success in the business world.
And, Ms. Shields,
your advertising campaign
for Mr. Klein's jeans, oh,
those jeans look wonderful on you.
Settle down, Steve.
Steve is, uh what would you
call yourself, Steve?
Oh, you know what you would call me.
- I know what I would call you.
- Yes.
Come on, you remember my title.
Why don't you tell them, Steve?
I am the owner and creator
of Chippendales.
Oh.
- It's a great show.
- Thank you.
- It really was.
- Thank you.
God, I've had it!
That's the third fucking
time in a month.
Well, why'd he say
he was here this time?
He didn't. Stopped even
bothering to make excuses.
- It's really sad, the insecurity.
- I know.
Oh, did I tell you about Valerie
Bertinelli last weekend?
- Oh God, what?
- So, she and I are in the VIP,
and we're, you know, partying,
and, uh, and who comes in?
"Oh, oh, Miss Bertinelli,
I, I am a big fan of you
and your hit CBS
television comedy program."
Oh, my God, it's fucking mortifying.
- Very sad.
- Oh, my God!
- Nick De Noia!
- Hey, Mr. Chippendale.
Well, hello.
Oh, my God!
- This is my fucking moment.
- Don't you see it?
- Nick.
- You cannot.
I am a brand now, people will follow.
I launch U.S. Male,
they will follow me there.
- Why?
- Why?
Yes, why?
Why now when you're
finally making money,
you're the toast of the town?
Because I can't fucking stand the guy.
Well, so he drops in a few times
a month, uninvited,
- and makes you miserable.
- Mm.
- Mm!
- You know, my brother, Eddie,
does the same exact thing.
You know, Otis was right.
Three thousand miles,
not nearly far enough.
What about 10,000 miles?
- What?
- Or 20,000 miles?
- What are you talking about?
- Yeah, what are you talking about?
I'm talking about a tour.
A Chippendales tour.
That's actually
not a terrible idea, Bradford.
Thank you.
Yeah, you know,
it's a different city every night.
Not a Banerjee in sight.
I have a friend who used to
manage the road company of Evita,
and he said it was heaven.
The theater takes care of everything.
They put you at the nicest hotels.
- They
- They pay for your dinner.
- Yes, they take you to dinner.
- They're flying you first class.
They treat you like kings, Nick.
And we would still have
the New York office.
- We could come and go as we please.
- Yeah.
A little west coast tour here,
a European leg there.
Yeah, it'd be like having
a country house to escape to.
Except the country house is
the whole fucking world.
You're kind of smart.
Yeah, I am.
- What are you doing? I mean
- I know.
- Hi.
- We have a problem.
Hello, Cheryl.
What is your problem?
Well, in a word, you.
You missed your deposition.
I tried, but my flight was canceled.
- I told you
- Uh, you shouldn't have been
in New York in the first place.
Not six weeks before trial.
I had business to attend to.
More important than
the 13 people suing you
for racial discrimination?
- Thirteen?
- Yeah, two more just joined.
Mazel.
- This is just a blatant money grab.
- No, this is a class-action lawsuit.
You have to take this seriously, Steve.
This could destroy us financially.
Cases like this,
damages can run into the millions.
And we don't have enough cash reserves
to sustain a hit like that.
Revenue has never been higher.
And neither have expenses.
The renovations,
the constant trips to New York,
the fines, the overcrowding, the
Oh God, the blocked exits.
We are single-handedly keeping
the LAFD in business.
I mean, you're their number one donor.
I can think of one major expense
we could get rid of.
Hey, I am the best money
that you ever spent.
Certainly better than
your fucking humidor.
Oh, you mean the centerpiece
of our soon-to-open VIP section?
- Who is smoking cigars here?
- Nobody yet 'cause it's not open.
But once it opens,
it's an option for people to have.
- Are you kidding?
- Steve!
I ran the numbers.
If we lose this case,
we don't have sufficient working capital
to maintain operations.
We're gonna lose the club.
Hello?
Oh, hey. Good, you're there.
- So, time's getting tight and
- Who is this?
Darrell, from the print shop.
I've been calling and calling.
I really need your sign-off
on those proofs.
I'm busy,
can't you just sign it yourself?
Uh, it really needs
to be your signature.
Okay, fine, I'll be there tomorrow.
Yeah? Great!
Any time before 3:00 would be
Hey, Steve. Check it out.
Look how nice that is.
Eighty-pound white gloss text stock.
Super high contrast,
it's really gonna pop.
Where do I sign?
Oh. Sure, yeah.
You're a busy man.
Here. Yep.
Here are the proofs.
Yep.
Looks good.
Actually.
Nice round number.
- Uh
- Is that a problem?
I mean, uh, no, no, it's
- Thank you.
- Uh
Oh shit.
What are you doing here?
There's something I wanted
to talk to you about.
You know phones work, right?
I just thought it'd be better in person.
I'm hungry. You feel like
grabbing a bite?
So what's the catch?
The catch?
There is no catch.
This is what's commonly known
as a win-win.
So I get half the profit?
Fifty-fifty, even-stevens.
And I do not have to put up a dime?
Or lift a finger.
All you have to do, sit back,
let the checks roll in.
And it instantly expands
the brand, nationally.
Internationally.
Think of what it'll do for the calendar.
I mean, what's Swedish for November?
- The whole world?
- Why not?
Russia, China.
Steve.
India.
I mean, talk about a homecoming.
Let's do it.
- Yeah?
- It's a win-win, right?
Who's your lawyer?
Why?
Well, draw up some paperwork.
Send it over.
Who needs lawyers?
I spend more than enough on legal fees.
See if I can remember my,
uh, law jargon.
Banerjee. One N, right?
Just read it off your paychecks.
Touché.
Alrighty.
Boom, done.
You, uh
you understand all that?
Perfectly.
Reenie? Reenie!
Reenie?
There's my girl.
- Hi.
- Hi.
There's my other girl.
What?
What is that?
Just a little something.
Oh God.
There you go.
Oh, my God, Steve.
This had to have cost a fortune.
It's only a fraction
of what you deserve.
You have to take this back.
- We cannot afford this, not right now.
- We can.
I've been making moves.
- What moves?
- Shrewd moves.
To shore up our company's finances.
What moves, Steve?
I increased the print run
of our calendar
- from 300,000 to half a million.
- What?
It'll boost our gross
by 66 percent, just like that.
Well, that's still not
gonna get us there.
I know.
That's why I struck a deal with Nick
to start a touring company.
We don't have a touring company.
- Yes, we do.
- No, we don't.
Yes, we do.
We don't do a thing and we get
50 percent of the profits.
We'll be in the black
by the end of the year.
How did the numbers look?
The numbers work.
- Really?
- I fixed it.
I fixed everything.
Why didn't you run this by me?
I just wanted to surprise you.
Steve, you have to stop
doing things behind my back.
Okay, I know.
I just wanted it to be right
before I brought it to you.
I
- Hey.
- The numbers work?
- The numbers work.
- They really work?
They really work.
You still have to take this back.
- Why?
- It's too much. It's
It's too much for me.
- No, it's not.
- Yes, it is.
Irene, you deserve
the life you have created.
You made this. You did this.
This is all yours.
This house.
This is your life
my Hollywood accountant.
Take it back.
I know things haven't
been great between us.
I know I did some bad things.
I'm sorry.
I am sorry.
If you don't take this back, I will.
- No, no, no, no, no.
- Yeah.
Oh, hello.
- Hi.
- Hi.
So nice to see you on this
lovely day. Please sit down.
- Make yourself comfortable.
- Thank you.
Thank you so much.
- How can I help you?
- I'm here
- about this.
- Ah.
Oh.
I know this one.
Your husband was very excited
to buy this for you.
Are you here to have it sized
for that delicate little neck of yours?
No, um, I'm here to return it.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
Is it not to your liking?
Actually, I love it.
It's the most beautiful thing
I've ever seen,
let alone owned.
It's just, um,
it's not very me.
I see.
You know, my dear,
your husband certainly
thought it was you.
Can I offer you a little advice,
woman-to-woman?
Yes, of course.
The man who bought this for you believes
you are this woman.
Why not be her?
Remember that time that you
faked the church group protest?
Well, it kind of turned me on.
What about the time? ♪
You were rolling over ♪
Fall on your face ♪
I'll call you back.
Steve.
Think of a time ♪
You'd best believe ♪
This thing is real ♪
Put away that gun ♪
I don't mind that you do shady things,
but I will not allow you to do them badly.
God help us ♪
Help us lose our minds ♪
- You kept it.
- I kept it.
This is an amazing idea.
It's vodka.
Two sips and nobody'll know
the difference.
That one.
Is anybody here?
- No, it's just us.
- Oh.
I got cocaine.
- What?
- Yeah, hold on.
Wait, why?
Because it's fun and we're rich.
I think that's what you're
supposed to do.
Okay, here.
I feel like Bonnie and Clyde.
I don't wanna get in trouble.
- Hey, Reenie.
- Yeah?
We're going to get
through this together.
- He's all right ♪
- I'll see his face ♪
I know.
Oh, that's too much.
Can we put some back in there?
- Oh, I think
- Okay, you do half and I do half.
One, two, three.
- Do you still feel the coke?
- Yeah, I do.
The water was running out ♪
Cool down ♪
Stop acting crazy ♪
Wait.
No more secrets. No more lies.
And if you hurt anybody else,
I'm gonna hurt you.
- You okay?
- Oh, I like that.
- Raise your right hand.
- Put your left hand on the bible.
Do you solemnly swear to tell
the truth, the whole truth,
and nothing but the truth,
so help you God?
- I do.
- Love from the bottom to the top ♪
Turn like a wheel ♪
He's all right ♪
See for yourself ♪
The Lord won't mind ♪
Have you ever heard
of a Chippendales VIP card?
I have never heard of these VIP cards.
Have you ever heard of a VIP membership?
I have never heard
of any membership program
associated with Chippendales.
So what you are saying
is that there is no such thing
as a Chippendales VIP card
or program, is that correct?
Yes.
That is the first time I have
seen that card in my whole life.
I know nothing about a VIP card.
I am not aware
of any such program at my club.
I do not remember.
I do not recall.
Not to my knowledge.
Tell nothing but the truth,
so help you God?
When we arrived at the front door,
the doorman had told us that
there was a VIP membership
necessary in order for me to enter.
I saw plenty of people
going in without VIP cards.
The only difference is
that they were white.
We have to appeal.
- Can we appeal?
- What is there to appeal?
I don't care, we have to fight this.
Uh, what should we do?
I mean, Cheryl, what would
you advise that we do?
- My advice, Chapter 11.
- What?
It'll buy you protection from
creditors while you reorganize.
I am not going
to declare bankruptcy, Cheryl.
It could help us keep the lights on.
- Irene, what? No.
- It's a smart move.
It's an admission of failure.
Steve, we may not have a choice.
If we declare, will people know?
You mean like the public?
- Yes.
- I mean, yeah.
Chapter 11s are public record.
So it could be covered in
newspapers and things like that?
- Chippendales declaring bankruptcy?
- I would say so.
Then, no.
Irene,
the calendar comes out in a few weeks.
It's going to sell really well,
and then all of this
will be a distant memory.
Can we please just, please just
not talk about bankruptcy
until the calendar's out, please?
Please?
Yeah.
Thank you.
- We'll wait.
- We'll wait.
It's crazy.
- How much are they making?
- Apparently a lot.
This still doesn't solve our problems.
But it's a start. Come here.
Still think the tour was a bad idea?
I never said it was a bad idea.
- You meant it.
- No, I didn't.
You wanted to say it.
You did.
- Don't deny it.
- I didn't say that.
I never, I never, I never said.
I should have.
- Your eyes said it.
- I know your eyes pretty well.
Give your business-savvy husband a kiss.
Beneath the bebop moon ♪
I want to croon with you ♪
Call me when you get to work.
- You know what that is?
- No.
It's our calendars.
- Are you serious?
- Yes.
Wow, did you put a rush on them?
Yes, of course, I did, I told you.
Special delivery!
- Hot off the presses.
- Is that what I think it is?
Yeah, there you go.
Yeah, yeah, there you go.
Makes a great stocking stuffer.
Oh, beautiful, boss.
Oh, that stocking sure is stuffed.
I know that's not real.
It's all lies down there.
It's beautiful, boss. It's beautiful.
- What about me?
- Preorders are through the roof.
I'm getting calls from states
I never heard of.
Did you know that there
is a West Virginia?
- Yeah.
- Wait, wait, wait, wait.
- You knew that?
- Wait.
- What? What's the matter?
- Did they shoot you from your bad side?
What's the deal?
- With what?
- The days!
- What do you mean?
- There's 31 of them.
That's right. July has 31 days!
Very good, Marlon.
Very good! Clap, clap, clap for Marlon.
Clap, clap, clap.
There's also 31 days on every month.
- No.
- Isn't that how it's supposed to be?
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
Are they all like this?
Boss, where are the other boxes?
- Oh fuck.
- Steve!
Hey, what are you doing?
What's happening?
How did this happen?
I don't know.
Well, didn't you check it
before it went to the press?
Yes, I checked! Of course, I checked!
How many are like this? How many
have already been printed like this?
- Banerjee Print Works.
- Stop the presses right now!
- Steve?
- The calendars,
there's a printing error
in the calendars.
Wait, wait, wait, hold up, slow down.
How many have you printed so far?
How many of the calendars
have you printed so far?
- What? How many?
- What's he saying?
Of the 500,000, how many
have you printed so far?
I mean all of them.
Tell me, Somen,
what's the number one rule of printing?
There's always something
that, that we can figure out.
We're gonna figure it out.
Everything's gonna be okay.
There's always a way to fix it.
We can fix it.
I think it's time to file.
This a bad time, boss?
Oh, no, no, no, come on in.
What can I do for you, Ray?
Yeah, I guess I, uh
Uh, so me and everybody,
we was just wondering
Is the club shutting down?
- That.
- Absolutely not.
Oh.
You know, Chapter 11, it's an
extremely misunderstood thing.
Companies, perfectly healthy
companies, do it all the time.
Listen, I'm sure it's difficult
to understand all these complex
fiscal matters,
but what I'm telling you is
everything is fine.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
'Cause the way
the article made it sound
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
And plus with the calendar mix-up
- Oh, don't worry about that.
- Any of that.
- Here, I brought you the mail.
- Thank you, Ray.
That's even bigger than the last one.
I didn't know touring
could be so lucrative.
Me neither.
That's just our half.
Oh, thank God for this tour.
It's the best thing
we've got going right now.
Boss, man, it was crazy.
There must have been
about 2,000 ladies in there.
- Two thousand?
- At least, probably, maybe more.
They're playing places
like this every night?
Every fucking night.
Yo, I grabbed a thingy.
Detroit, Atlanta, St. Louis.
I feel like Nick kind of played you.
Like, he wasn't straight with you
about how big this was gonna be.
How you even know he's being real with
you about how much money's coming in?
It could be ten times the amount.
I mean, by the looks of things
something ain't right.
Nick is probably cheating us.
Nick would never cheat us.
We have no idea
how much money is coming in.
He's playing big, big theaters.
You sound completely cuckoo right now.
We don't have access
to the accounting, Irene.
We just have to trust that this
fucking guy is telling us the truth.
The contract gives us access
to the accounting.
- There's no contract.
- It's just a silly little napkin.
- A napkin?
- Yeah, we were at House of Pies,
and we just, like, did it on a napkin.
- You didn't have a lawyer handle it?
- You didn't have Cheryl?
I did not feel it was necessary.
It's fine. It's fine, it's
just a napkin.
It's not a real contract.
This is 100 percent a real contract.
Toilet paper, pizza box, ticket stubs,
as long as it's in writing,
it is a contract.
- That's absurd.
- Yeah, well, regardless, you're stuck.
- For how long?
- I mean, when does it expire?
Honey.
"In perpetuity"?
You signed in perpetuity?
You don't know what that means.
He tricked me!
He used a word that
he knew I wouldn't know
because nobody knows that word.
Did you know that word?
- No!
- No.
And now he controls touring rights.
He controls my touring rights forever.
That's what perpetuity means!
- It means forever!
- It's fucked up, yo.
Like, super fucked up.
Like, really fucked up.
Hey, a call for you, boss. Line three.
- What do you want?
- Male stripping, huh?
Alright, Ma.
"Steve Banerjee,
the owner of Chippendales,
"the west LA night spot known
for its exotic male dancing
and legal troubles."
Somen
It was.
Well, apparently,
it's a male stripping club now,
and a highly disreputable one at that.
"Criminality, financial chicanery,
- all manner of corruption and vice."
- Are you done?
"Safety violations,
conflict with
the fire department, lawsuits."
What do you want me to say, Ma?
It's not.
Somen, you have
Brought shame to the family name.
The thought that this is
what I left India for,
that this is what I abandoned
the family business for,
it's shameful.
- It is.
- It fills you with sadness.
And anger.
The only saving grace
is that father was,
that father was not alive
long enough to witness it.
Yeah. Very much so.
Anything else?
Boss, these guys broke the shower again.
I fixed it, but can you have
a talk with them?
- Yeah.
- You cool if I go home?
- Yes, you can go.
- Okay.
Ooh ♪
Ooh ♪
Ooh ♪
Ooh ♪
Ooh ♪
Ooh ♪
I'm not going down on my knees ♪
Begging you to adore me ♪
Can't you see it's misery ♪
And torture for me ♪
When I'm misunderstood ♪
Try as hard as you can ♪
I've tried as hard as I could ♪
To make you see ♪
How important it is for me ♪
Here is a plea ♪
From my heart to you ♪
Nobody knows me ♪
As well as you do ♪
You know how hard it is for me ♪
To shake the disease ♪
That takes hold of my tongue ♪
In situations like these ♪
Understand me ♪
Understand me ♪
Understand me ♪
Understand me ♪
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