Willow (2022) s01e06 Episode Script

1
We have a sayin' about people
who make empty threats.
They make nice hats.
By the child's a hundredth day,
they get seared with it's family's mark.
This is my father's mark.
The mark of Kael.
I found the whereabouts
of the Kymerian Cuirass.
That's why I sent Madmartigan in search.
I'm afraid I've sent him to his death.
What happened at Nockmaar,
that wasn't me.
No one gets out of Skellin alive.
- Skellin?
- Dread Mines of Skellin. In the mountains.
What happened to you?
After 200 moons,
my sister has come home.
I am, totally,
desperately in love with you.
No, no! Kit! Kit! Kit! Kit!
Trolls.
Airk.
Join us.
Embrace your power.
No. Definitely not.
Spooky voice, scary city. No, thanks.
What was that That is crazy.
Not today. No, thank you.
All right.
Here we go.
You okay?
Wish I had my staff, or the wand.
Some cainroot for this
thrumming headache.
Come on.
Your wits, my sprightliness.
We're gonna be outta here in no time.
I'm sorry.
That's just what everyone says
when they get thrown in here.
Isn't that right, guys?
Didn't I almost say exactly
those same words when they tossed me in?
Well, how long ago was that?
Well, let's see.
What's today? Wednesday?
I'd say about ten years, give or take.
Really tried those first few.
The worst part isn't getting caught,
or the punishment once you are.
The worst part is believing that
next time you're gonna get it right.
I suppose, in the end, it's hope that
really breaks your spirit.
Downer.
And I'm supposed to be
in charge of morale around here.
So what did the two of you do
to get thrown in here
with the rest of us bad apples?
Did you knife somebody?
Something juicy?
They separated us
from the others when we got here.
I don't know why.
Well, you'll find out
soon enough, I'm sure.
- Who are you?
- I'm sorry.
Where are my manners?
Name's Madmartigan.
Hi, there.
I am Lord Sarris,
chief administrator here at Skellin.
This ill-tempered crank on my left
is my brother, Falken.
Say hello, Falken.
They look puny and weak.
Chop them up and feed 'em to the dogs.
Nice. Real nice. Forgive him.
He's not appealing,
but he speaks his mind,
and I suppose that's something.
Anywho,
we gather you're not from the Wildwood.
What makes you say that?
Puny, weak, feeble, frail, runty.
I'd have said your clothes,
which are stylish yet practical,
virtues not typically ascribed
to tree scum.
So, where you from? Back east?
I'm Kit Tanthalos of Tir Asleen.
Seriously? Why would you tell him that?
Tir Asleen, huh? Schmancy.
Never been myself.
Always meant to go but
I can make some arrangements
to get you there.
You know, I'm not wild about Nelwyn.
Please, don't speak till
you're spoken to.
Got it? Thanks, that'd be great.
So what's a nice girl from Tir
Asleen doing in the Wildwood?
- Looking for someone.
- Right. You find 'em?
Not yet.
But I will.
Right after I get outta here.
Much as I appreciate pluck,
the unvarnished truth is this.
You're gonna spend
the rest of your life here,
and no one is coming to save you.
One person sneaking in there? Maybe.
Five of us? Impossible.
I'm begging you, let me do this.
I'll get in, get 'em out,
meet you on the other side.
You're not going anywhere without us.
- We're rescuing Willow.
- And Kit.
And all the other people they took.
Cut down any Trolls that get in our way.
She doesn't mean undermining
their confidence either, do you?
So, when you
fought your way out the last time
and slaughtered all those Trolls,
you went right out the front?
Yeah, about that
When I said "slaughtered,"
I didn't actually mean "slaughtered."
More like I slaughtered their pizzazz.
Their what?
- What are we walking through?
- It's best not to get too specific.
- Pretty sure it's Troll poop.
- What'd I just say?
I have had ten years to think about
exactly how I would get in
and out of this rank,
cesspool without anyone realizing
I was ever even here.
Ow, my coccyx!
How much do you really know
about the Crone?
'Cause there are misconceptions.
Is she the eldritch nightmare
that people make her out to be?
Yes.
But she has some positive
qualities, too.
She taught us how to
refine the vermiscus,
turn it into elixir, the good stuff.
- Yes!
- Ooh.
Look, you guys gonna torture me
Or Or what?
Torture you?
Well, what do you think we are, animals?
We only want to incentivize you
to work with us
in procuring that which our
mistress desires above all else.
Hold still, hold still.
No, no, ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah, you are.
Come to papa.
Guys, is this really necessary?
No, no, no, no. Come on.
You don't have to do that.
She's gonna cooperate.
We know she was with you
when you fled into the Wildwood.
- Who?
- Elora Danan.
Brought him back, I could've understood
why every time he chose you!
You good?
- What do you mean?
- Are we good?
- We're fine.
- Great.
I just feel like we've left some stuff,
I don't know
Unresolved?
And maybe you still have some
doubts about my character,
which are totally valid.
I mean, my dad did tell me
to murder Boorman, so
- I knew it!
- Don't sweat it, pal.
He's a first-rate shmoog, so
But I just feel like
we were making a real connection,
before I overshared.
I really don't think that this
is the time or the place, do you?
If you're asking if I'd rather do this
in private than in a
mine full of Trolls?
100%, that's an easy yes.
But who knows when that'll be?
Or we could just not talk about it.
I was creeped out, 'cause I
thought you'd ganked your brother.
I accept that you were possessed
but I don't wanna have
a feelings conversation.
I wanna concentrate on sorcerering,
saving Kit and Willow,
getting out of here, finding Airk,
and then going home and taking
a very long, very hot bath.
Uh, guys?
- Should it be doing that?
- Uh, no, that is definitely unusual.
Elora, look. The wand.
Why is it doing that?
- Well, make it stop.
- How?
Stop shaking
Avagdu!
- Maybe just relax.
- I am relaxed! Okay?
You don't sound relaxed.
I'm telling you,
this has nothing to do with me.
I don't know what's going on,
but I don't have
- No.
- Any Any
No, no, no, no!
Gesundheit.
Tunnel collapse?
There's activity on Coronet level.
We may have some
instigators on our hands.
Possibly even rabble-rousers.
I deplore those who rouse rabble.
We know, sir.
I've dispatched a sentinel unit
to the distillery.
No.
It's their friends.
They've come to liberate them.
- Elora Danan is here!
- Elora Danan has come!
Terrible at anticipating
the second half of my sentences.
Go, go, go.
Let's bag some fancy Daikini.
- You're Willow.
- And you're not Madmartigan.
- No, you're not.
- Yes I am, kiddo.
I am your father,
and I've missed the hell out of you.
All right, fine, I'm not.
So, why are you pretending to be?
That is a long and delightful story,
but not one we have time for now.
All right, then. Who are you?
I know who he is.
He's Allagash.
Fought alongside Madmartigan
at Land's End.
- Guilty.
- Oh.
My My dad told me about you.
You were the only knight in Galladoorn
that was dumber than he was.
Braver. I'm sure he meant braver.
Besides,
I'm the only one who knows where he is.
Wait, but
But Boorman told me that he was betrayed
and murdered by a member of his
crew for the Kymerian Cuirass.
Of course he did.
So, you're saying he lied?
No, no. Madmartigan was betrayed.
We all were. By Boorman.
This is ridiculous.
This is never gonna work.
Its genius is its simplicity.
Hurry up, they'll be here soon.
I knew we weren't the only ones
they were taking,
but I had no idea it was this many.
Why do they need so much?
They turn it into this
Makes 'em stronger, faster,
like the stuff that was leaking
out of Ballantine, Merrick, him.
Evil.
If we capture Elora Danan,
do you realize
what this would mean for us?
I do.
The Crone would reward us
with whatever we desired.
Cashmere, Galladoorn, Tir Asleen even.
Yeah, 'cause when I said, "I do,"
what I really meant was, "Explain
it to me like I'm an imbecile."
We gotta move, people.
I have to save as many as I can.
I need to find Kit.
I promised I'd get them
to the Immemorial City.
You have a family now,
and when this is all over,
you're gonna have to decide whether
you're with her, or with us.
How are you gonna get them all out?
Well, if it goes
as well as I'm hoping it will,
straight out the front door,
and I'll be takin' a lot more
than their pizzazz.
Right. 'Cause I already took that.
Find your friends, get 'em out alive.
This might be the only chance
you ever get to make it right.
Scorpia, they're coming. We need to go.
Here, hey.
Hand me that snout probe on the tray.
I can get outta this cage.
I think the Trolls were right.
Yeah, the others are here
and they're trying to find us.
If I find out Elora's been using
the wand without my permission,
you know I'm gonna be so miffed.
Your father's alive.
You help me outta here,
I'll take you to him.
Come on, kid. Toss it. Yeah!
A-ha! All right.
Now a little la di da.
Obviously, you're lost.
Wrong again, smarty pants.
I know exactly where I'm going.
Oh, come on.
Yes! Ooh! Yeah!
No! Might have been a little premature.
Ah! Oh, God. Hey! I'm slipping.
I'm slipping, hurry up.
Hurry up.
Jeez.
Ah! Put your back into it. There you go.
Lift. Lift.
You couldn't have just waited,
like, one more second?
In retrospect, I should have.
- Thanks for saving my life.
- Okay.
I guess you're not as dumb
as Madmartigan said you were.
Right?
- No, you're dumber.
- Hey!
Okay, so you have two eyes.
- Of course I do.
- What were you thinkin'?
You could've pulled her down with you.
You know, for what it's worth,
Mads always said you were the
most courageous man he ever knew,
with the biggest heart,
but you worry too much.
Yeah?
You're telling us Mads has been
in Skellin all these years?
Well, not in Skellin exactly.
It's complex.
There are doors
and passages in these caves
that even the Trolls don't know about.
They lead to ancient places.
Now, to be honest,
bet Mads would be happier
if I led you out instead of deeper in.
You shouldn't have told us anything
because if he's here
I'm not leaving without him.
You good?
- Hi, how's it going?
- Hey, how are ya?
I'm okay.
- Hey ya.
- How are ya?
You okay?
Is that you? Are you doing that?
Elora?
Unclench.
Seriously, you're gonna kill us all.
When I concentrate on the next,
sometimes I don't sneeze at all.
I'm not gonna sneeze.
Don't be ashamed.
- I didn't
- Come on.
Hurry up, follow me.
Uh
- Are we close?
- Uh
Don't worry,
you'll be with Kit in no time.
You're lost.
No, just getting my bearings.
You're too tall.
No one will believe you're a Troll.
I sell it with my performance.
Unlike you three.
Not even remotely convincing.
This damn day.
Got word of a spill on Triton level.
I need a Krom unit supervisor down there
to oversee the mop crew.
- Get fit.
- Me?
No. Thank you though.
What did you say?
I'd love to,
but they've got me going up to,
you know, fire up the troops,
'cause I guess the spirits have been low
since they shortened our breaks.
I gave you an order, supe.
Right. Of course. I was kidding.
Lead the way, sir.
Help.
He'll be fine. He's quick on his feet.
- Hi. Which way is the loo?
- What?
- Ooh!
- Come on.
I thought you said no one ever escapes.
I was going through
a bit of a rough patch,
doin' some soul-searching, feelin' kinda
lethargic and stuck, you know?
That was like eight minutes ago.
Well, kind of a lot's
happened since then.
I'm with you guys now. I'm back!
We'll find Madmartigan,
we get the heck outta here,
and finally get back to pursuing
my true passion, songwriting.
- Freedom! I'm free. I'm free
- This guy's insane.
Legs not working yet. Ow! Oh!
Find them!
Whatever you do, don't look down.
Yeah. Yeah, totally.
Except, I'm one of those people,
you tell me not to look
or think about something, then I
I have to look and think about it, okay?
Brought him back,
and I could've finally understood
why every time he chose you!
You were right. I shouldn't have looked.
Come on. Come on.
No, no, no, wait!
- Did we just lose Cherlindrea's wand?
- Uh-huh.
Yikes.
- Willow's gonna kill me.
- Yeah, he might actually kill you.
Not helpful, Boorman.
But maybe just
don't mention it straight away.
Come on.
So
Is it lunch time yet?
What were you saying?
Just if you guys fought together
in the Arkreeshian Wars
- Yeah.
- why weren't you around when I was
I mean, when I was, like, growing?
Mads deserted
after the Battle at Land's End,
ran off to chase fortune and glory.
Took a lot to forgive him for that.
- For breaking his oath?
- Yeah, what?
No, for not inviting me to go with him.
Okay!
- Nearly got a mace in the face.
- Get down there.
- Right. Move on.
- Okay, come on.
- What was that?
- I don't know.
Anyhow, I was passed out
drunk in a Hazelton
friendship parlor when Mads
tracked me down after 20 years,
asked me to join with him
for one more adventure.
- To find the Cuirass.
- Yeah.
Had I'd known I'd be spending
ten years in a crow's cage,
I would've politely declined.
But, you know, what can I say?
He's my brother, I love him.
Me too.
For all the trouble
he used to get me in to,
I really could've used him on this one.
It doesn't look like
this goon's goin' anywhere.
Doesn't seem so.
- What do you think?
- I don't know.
Damn it. There's two things I hate,
and one of 'em is killing.
Do you think he'll put
this weapon down and walk away? ♪
Probably not, but that's okay ♪
I'll deal with him in seconds flat ♪
Then we'll go and eat a rat ♪
What is wrong with you?
Here.
Hey, buddy, any chance you'll put
your weapon down and walk away?
Didn't think so.
Hey, guys, come on.
What's the other thing?
- That you hate.
- Olives.
Really?
I love olives.
Three years of searching the world,
vague clues, dead ends, finally
led us here, to a hidden doorway.
Doorway to what?
Wiggleheim's tomb.
Legendary Nelwyn adventurer,
raconteur, darts champion.
They say he's buried with all
the treasures from his adventures,
- including, possibly the Kymerian Cuirass.
- The Kymerian Cuirass.
Never seen your father so excited,
even more than that time
we were with those three
Yeah.
He thought of Boorman like a son,
would've died for him.
So when he betrayed us
and stole the Lux
Broke his heart.
Come on.
What happened here?
Fire.
Do you actually know where we're going?
Yeah, 'cause this doesn't feel right.
It is. We're almost there.
Almost where?
Wiggleheim's tomb.
Okay, before you two
completely flip out,
if I'd taken you to the crow's cages,
we would've ended up in one.
I know it doesn't seem
like it right now,
but everything
I've done has been for Kit and Willow.
The only way we're gonna ever find them,
save them,
and get them outta this place alive
is if I'm wearing the Kymerian Cuirass.
- I knew it.
- Unbelievable.
What happened when you found the door?
The Trolls had us cornered.
I fought them off so he could go in.
They were only interested
in the legendary Madmartigan,
so when they caught me, I gave
them his name instead of mine
so they'd stop looking and he could
save the world.
Now, that was ten years ago.
I don't know
what's on the other side of that door
or what's keeping him from coming
back, but I'm gonna find out.
And I'm comin' with you.
- How do you get outta this place?
- Oh, God.
- I'm spinnin' out, J.
- No. No.
Yeah.
And it's not the first time either.
This panicky feeling happens
whenever I get close to
I really thought
I was starting to figure it out.
What?
Magic.
Yeah.
But it's like, the harder
I try to control it, the more I just
I feel like it's slipping away.
And then I'm I'm spinning.
- I don't
- No.
It's not you, okay?
- Okay.
- It's this place.
Yeah. No.
Definitely It's me.
This is your fault.
- Uh, untrue.
- I'm so sorry.
Don't be.
You're worried about Kit.
I should've known he lied.
It's all he ever does.
Let's all agree that we're
somewhat culpable for something,
and maybe just try and concentrate
on finding the secret door, yeah?
Which should be here somewhere.
Think there's another tunnel back there
that we didn't try.
It's worth a shot.
Wait! Just Please. Wait.
I can do this.
I can save everyone. I can fix it.
Fix what?
The biggest mistake of my life.
- If I'd just
- Boorman.
Big sack of potatoes!
It's been a long time.
Traitor.
Uh, where's the wand?
Look, I may or may not have,
well, kind of, like, dropped it.
- What?
- She dropped it to save me
- Yeah, exactly.
- Shush, you.
And the staff? What, you drop that too?
- No. Graydon has that.
- And where's Graydon?
Supervising a spill
on Triton level, probably.
- You are in serious trouble, young lady.
- Yeah, I know.
- The hair!
- Not the hair!
- I kinda missed you.
- Who cares about your hair?
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- Missed you too In a way.
- Hey.
Stop it! Stop it!
You puckered old bergencoif!
You spineless little zudcudder.
Come on, guys. Language.
- Sorry. Sorry, ladies.
- I'm sorry.
I prayed you'd still be alive
so I would have the pleasure
of killing you myself.
I'm right here.
Buffet's open, beanpole. Grab a tray.
Beanpole? Yeah, well, I've actually
put on quite a lotta bulk.
You know what, you have. You've
gotten bigger, you look good.
Well, thanks.
It's diet mainly actually,
a little bit of torture endurance
- Whatever he told you, it's a lie.
- You stole the Lux Arcana.
Back from him!
He got Blaylock and Mookie killed.
He betrayed us, he
- He betrayed Madmartigan.
- Come on.
This guy will say anything.
That was you, huh? That was him.
You think I've been here for ten years,
- 'cause I like it balmy, huh?
- You were his squire.
And you left him to die.
I know.
I would've stayed with him till the end.
I should have. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
- I think there's someone coming.
- Trolls.
They caught me here the last time.
They must've know I'd come back here.
They're so smart. Damn it.
What's the quickest way out of here?
- The doorway.
- Yeah.
Put your arm in here.
- Me? Really?
- Come on, yeah.
Put your hand in there
and pull the lever.
Really?
Trust me.
Good work. Stay put.
Here we go. Solving
elaborate booby traps.
Yeah, I don't see a secret door.
That's because
You don't know how to look.
A big head. Great. Where's the treasure?
Through the ages unremembered,
I have tested those who entered.
Seeking fortune, fame and glory,
hoping those might change their story,
but the greatest treasure I ever found
was the love and laughter all around.
What a lovely sentiment, huh?
Though should riches
be your heart's desire,
the answers I shall now require.
And if, by chance, you don't reply,
in my tomb you all shall die.
Hang on.
Did he just say that we'd all die?
He did say that.
- Perfect.
- So I pass from sire to heir,
and each of brothers takes his share.
A gift or curse I may be,
used by others more than thee.
- Anybody?
- It's a riddle, I'm good at these.
- Great. You got the answer?
- Wait, wait, wait.
- A name.
- What?
- Yeah?
- That's the answer.
We're goin' with "A name?"
Congratulations.
We're in. We did it!
If once more you do succeed,
- my vault of treasures is yours indeed.
- Oh.
Where whatever be your heart's appeal,
awaits you beyond his seal.
Come on, come on. Team Allagash.
We got this.
All right, Wiggleheim,
give us your best shot.
Beggars have what wise men crave,
but both shall take it to their grave.
- I don't know.
- No?
Hmm.
Seems perhaps you need more time,
or if you wish, I'll repeat my rhyme.
- Seems perhaps you need more time
- Shut up!
or if you wish,
I'll repeat my rhyme.
Seems perhaps you need more time,
or if you wish, I'll repeat my rhyme.
What wise men crave
Seems perhaps you need more time,
or if you wish, I'll repeat my rhyme.
Hey, will you show some respect
and stop whacking Wiggleheim?
Seems perhaps you need more time,
or if you wish, I'll repeat my rhyme.
You don't happen to know some spell,
or any magic
that might override this thing, do you?
Not without my staff,
or Cherlindrea's wand.
All right.
Seems perhaps you need more time,
or if you wish, I'll repeat my rhyme.
I'm tellin' you,
he is not who he says he is.
He's Well, he's a real jerk.
Who you gonna believe?
Two-bit criminal with no conscience
or loyalty to anyone,
or the world's last greatest
troubadour? Listen to this.
Little monkey, little monkey ♪
Come and sit across my lap ♪
I'll pet you, run my fingers ♪
Okay. Your songs stink!
How dare you, sir!
I've gotten much better.
Yeah? Doesn't sound like it to me.
I've got it!
It's "nothing."
The answer is "nothing."
Get off. Oh, you idiot.
Where is it? Where is it?
Here.
Kit.
- Dad?
- Can you hear me?
He didn't take his sword.
You can't take anything.
Not in there.
- Kit.
- I'm going.
- No.
- I need to.
I need you to listen to me.
- If you do, you can never come back.
- I don't care.
- Uh, I won't let you.
- Yeah, are you gonna stop me?
We both are.
Kit, we have to get out of here.
You can still save Airk.
Kit, please. I need your help right now.
- Stop.
- Dad.
- Kit, please. Kit.
- Let go of me.
- Dad!
- Kit.
Dad! Dad! Dad!
Where's Allagash?
He's gone.
He got the Lux, too.
We need to get out of here now.
Hi there.
Which one of you is Elora Danan?
I am.
All right, ya know what?
Take both of them, ugh, kill the others.
Hey, guys.
What are you gonna do, peck?
Kill all of us?
Don't call me a peck.
I say do it, Willow.
Flash fry these furry framps.
Seize them.
Sarris!
Recognize these?
Not really.
I'm here to even the odds.
Come on. Come on!
Let her go!
Yeah.
I thought you were smarter
than this, Madmartigan.
You've been wrong about
something for ten years.
Really? What's that?
I'm not Madmartigan.
Then who the hell are you?
- Chloe Allagash's brave little man.
- What?
And I was just starting to like you.
Shut up!
- Can I help you?
- Yeah.
- How's your day?
- I lost the wand.
- Shit.
- I know.
What are you doing?
Damn thing doesn't work.
I put the Lux in and nothing.
Ha! Maybe a lifetime of lying, cheating,
stabbing your friends in the back
made you, somehow, I don't
know, unworthy of its power?
There's only one way to find out
if it'll work for you, kid.
More Trolls coming.
- What's the quickest way out of here?
- Through that gate.
Go. Go.
Your father
could've killed me but he didn't,
not because he didn't want to.
- What? We have to go right now.
- Listen to me!
He didn't kill me
because I think he thought that
someday I'd cross paths with you,
your brother, your mother
God, I had the hots for her.
He thought I'd be able
to tell you that
Well, tell me what?
He went off to fight
whatever's down there
'cause he believed one of you
would protect what matters most up here.
What matters most?
Elora Danan.
Now get outta here.
Come on.
Ha! Bring it.
That's it.
I hope to hell she made it out.
She did.
You think?
I know.
Where's Allagash?
Oh, bummer.
- I think I see the way out.
- Okay, great.
And how do we get there?
Kit, come on.
Kit, we have to keep going.
It's gonna collapse.
Then make it stop.
I don't know how.
You two, please leave it for now.
You started this.
I didn't mean to.
All that power, and no self-control.
- I was
- Guys!
- I was trying to help.
- Yeah, of course you were.
That's what you always want,
is to help, right?
To
To find Airk, and to save Graydon,
just rescue us all.
I I heard his voice.
He was calling to me.
To me! And I could've got him,
I could've brought him back,
and I could've finally understood
why every time he
chose you instead of me!
Elora! Please!
But now I can't.
- Please.
- Uh, hello?
Or what? What? You'll kill me?
Kit, Elora, come on!
Kit, what are you doing?
You're tearing everything down.
- You're right.
- Kit!
It's all my fault. You know
Blame me, hate me, just please,
can you just do it somewhere else
because if we stay here
we're both gonna
- Kit! No! No! Kit! No!
- Kit!
- No! No! No! Kit! Kit!
- Kit! Kit!
- Vantage abhor turmach.
- Kit. Can you hear me?
Please, Willow.
- Vantage abhor turmach.
- Kit, stay up.
Vantage abhor turmach.
Please, Willow, please.
Vantage abhor turmach.
Vantage abhor turmach.
No! Break it!
- Break it, Willow!
- Vantage abhor turmach.
No! No! No! No! No!
No.
It's yours.
Vantage abhor turmach.
Vantage abhor turmach.
Vantage abhor turmach.
Vantage abhor turmach.
How? That's impossible.
Hey!
Anybody out there?
Anybody?
Anybody?
Help!
Anybody?
Who are you?
Are you real?
I think so. Are you?
Are you the reason I'm here?
But whoever brought you, brought me too.
So
Are you gonna
let me out?