American Born Chinese (2023) s01e07 Episode Script

1
Jamie? [CHUCKLES]
Oh, my God, Robin!
Oh, God, look at you, baby. Oh!
- You haven't aged a day.
- Look at me? Look at you!
Oh, God, please. It's
just Spanx and lipstick.
[BOTH LAUGH]
Can you believe all this?
Look at that. They even got
that nasty old rug right.
[LAUGHS] Do you remember how many
times Scotty's dog peed on that rug?
[CHUCKLES] I think Scotty
peed on it a few times.
[ROBIN CHUCKLES]
It feels like another lifetime, huh?
[HOST] And now, please
welcome to the stage,
America's favorite neighbor, Jamie Yao!
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING, CHEERING]
There he is. Looking sharp.
They love ya. Soak it up.
- [JAMIE SIGHS]
- [ACTOR CHUCKLES]
- [HOST] It's great to see you, Jamie.
- Good to be here.
But, I have to say, you look
different. Are you forgetting something?
N-No. I d I don't think so.
- [BOTH LAUGH]
- [HOST] Does that jog your memory? Huh?
Look familiar?
- [ACTOR] You gotta put it on.
- [HOST] Come on. Put it on.
- [AUDIENCE MEMBER] Yeah! Put it on!
- [HOST LAUGHS] Yeah.
- [AUDIENCE MEMBER] Yeah!
- [HOST LAUGHS]
[CHEERING]
So, Jamie, 30 years
ago, you introduced us
to one of the most iconic
characters in television history.
[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING, CHEERING]
Thank you. Thank you. That's very kind.
And now, there's rumors
that he may be coming back.
Thanks, in part, to your
newfound popularity online.
I have to admit, I'm
not on social media.
Well, I am, and you are one of
the top trending memes of the year.
Oh. Is that a good thing?
- [LAUGHTER]
- [HOST, CHUCKLING] Is that
Here, you can see for
yourself. Let's take a look!
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]
- [WHISTLE TONES]
- [CRASH]
- [AUDIENCE GASPS]
- What could go Wong?
[LAUGHING]
What could go Wong?
[ALL LAUGHING]
- [ALL GASP]
- What could go Wong?
[LAUGHING]
What could go Wong?
[CHEERING]
[HOST] Classic stuff,
right? Come on. Good stuff.
Tell us, Jamie, what was it like
playing such an unforgettable
role for so many years?
Okay, dude, I'm just gonna
ask. Who was that guy?
He's the one attempting the uprising.
My father's enemy. The Bull Demon.
That's his name? The Bull Demon?
Yeah, and now he has the Iron
Staff. He's more dangerous than ever.
I can't believe this whole
thing's over my parents' pendant.
That's what he wants
in return for my father,
but if I give it to him, then it's
over. Heaven will lose the war.
Yeah, but
it's your dad.
We need to see Guanyin.
She'll know what to do next.
[JIN] Okay.
We're walking?
Okay, we're walking.
[GROANING]
[PANTING]
[IN MANDARIN] I bet
that's pretty painful.
That glass shard was forged
in Diyu, the underworld.
The longer it remains in you,
the more it pulls your soul apart.
you wanted an uprising.
[PANTING]
Not just Not just to
settle some old score.
Hey, why not both? [CHUCKLES]
You have the staff. Isn't that enough?
[PANTING]
[WHISPERING] Oh, it's
enough. You'll see.
One more day.
Mowang, don't do this.
This isn't who you are.
[GRUNTING, PANTING]
You don't get to tell me who I am.
You have no idea who I am.
[GRUNTING]
[SCREAMING]
[PANTING]
- [DOOR SLAMS]
- [DEAD BOLT TURNS]
[TEAKETTLE WHISTLES]
[DOOR OPENS]
Guanyin-pusa. [PANTS]
Guanyin-pusa, something happened.
Aren't you going to
introduce me to your friend?
Oh, sorry. This is Jin.
Uh, hi. I'm Jin.
It's nice to finally meet you.
- Would you like some tea?
- Uh, no, thanks.
I meant, I would love some
tea. Thank you very much.
Okay, continue.
So, we were with some friends when
Ji Gong and Niu Mowang attacked.
My father appears and there is a fight.
Niu Mowang stabbed him and took him.
He said I have only one day
to bring him the Fourth Scroll.
So, where's the pendant? We need it.
I'm afraid that won't help you either.
It turns out the pendant
is not the Fourth Scroll.
But the prophecy, though.
The stones.
But that's all they were. Stones.
W But But the bad
guys don't know that, right?
So we can still use it
to get your dad back.
- We just do the abracadabra thing again.
- Yeah!
Unfortunately, I no
longer have the pendant.
Where is it?
A dog ate it.
- What?
- [CHUCKLES] It was a weird day.
Then we must call for help.
[IN MANDARIN] Pigsy, Sandy and Nezha.
they are needed in Heaven
to protect the Jade Emperor
from the allies of Niu Mowang.
We have to do something. You
said you would support me.
And I have.
I supported your quest
to follow your dreams.
I never promised that
they would come true.
Not all dreams do.
[SIGHS]
It's time for us to go home.
And, Jin,
you should go home too.
Wait, but, uh, what about his dad
and all the stuff that's
going on up in Heaven?
You've got to let me help.
Please, I want to help.
No, Jin.
She's right.
It's too dangerous.
Thank you.
You were a good guide.
No, I wasn't.
I didn't guide you to anything.
Sorry, Wei-Chen.
Hey.
Here.
Don't forget your birthday gift.
Thanks, Wei-Chen.
- [DEAD BOLT TURNS]
- [DOOR OPENS]
[GRUNTING, BREATHING HEAVILY]
[SPITS]
[SUN WUKONG] Mowang may be lost forever,
but you aren't.
Help me escape and I'll bring you back.
[SCOFFS]
- [DOOR SLAMS]
- [DEAD BOLT TURNS]
[CRICKETS CHIRPING]
Wei-Chen, are you ready?
I'm staying.
With or without the Fourth
Scroll, I will rescue my father.
[CHUCKLES]
You remind me so much of him.
So sure of yourself.
But confidence can be
a dangerous thing too.
Guanyin-pusa, I believe in my dream.
I believe the answer will
reveal itself when I need it.
If you choose this path,
you do it alone.
Do you think anyone in heaven
would want that coffee table?
[SCOFFS] Don't answer that. [SIGHS]
- [TYPING]
- [SONG PLAYING ON RADIO, IN MANDARIN]
- [MRS. WANG] Jin-ah.
- Mmm?
Daddy's gonna pick you
up from school today.
- Okay, why?
- I'm going to visit Elaine Ayí.
- Auntie Elaine in Sacramento?
- Mmm.
- For how long?
- Couple days.
Okay. Is she, like, sick or something?
No, nothing like that. She's fine.
I left some fried rice and
vegetables in the fridge.
- Heat it up if you get hungry, huh?
- Yeah, got it.
- And don't forget. Trash, Monday.
- Mmm.
I thought you said you were only
gonna be gone for a couple of days.
- Mom, what's going on?
- Hmm?
[SONG CONTINUES]
I just need some time, that's all.
- Are you and Dad splitting up?
- Aiya.
[SCOFFS] Don't make such
a fuss before school.
It's not good for you, huh?
Jin, guess what? Brendan got
food poisoning last night.
- Well, is he okay?
- He'll be fine. It's just toilet stuff.
The point is he's out a few days,
so you're starting at midfield tomorrow.
Tomorrow?
Osito Valley? Our biggest
game of the season?
Right! Right. Yeah.
I gotta say, I thought
you'd be more excited.
Yeah, sorry, yes, sir. I am. I
haven't gotten very much sleep lately.
Me neither. This is a big one.
Get your head right,
Wang. I need you ready.
- Oh, hey!
- Hey!
Everyone's still
talking about your party.
Maybe we could make it a regular thing.
- My birthday?
- [CHUCKLES] No, bowling.
- Oh, right.
- [CHUCKLING] Are you okay?
Yeah, sorry. Or Uh
[CHUCKLES] I don't know, maybe.
Hey, seriously, is everything okay?
It's just, my parents are
[LAUGHS] Sorry. Um
- My parents, this morning
- [DRUMMING]
[MASCOT] Let's go! Osito
Valley's going down!
Whoo!
My mom was She was
giving me a ride to school
and we were talking and she's
trying to start a new business
but she was talking about
- [MASCOT] Up top! Whoo! That's the spirit.
- My mom is Like, she's trying to
- Dude, watch it!
- [MASCOT] Oh, sorry, bud. High five.
- Boop. [LAUGHS]
- Dude!
- Jin!
- [MASCOT] Dude, what's your deal?
[KINNEY] Hey! Hey!
[STAMMERS] God, what the heck?
- [MASCOT GROANS]
- Watch that. Are you okay? Are you okay?
[MASCOT] Yeah.
My office. Now.
- Okay. Up we go.
- [MASCOT GROANING]
[BELL RINGS]
[STUDENTS CHATTERING]
[STUDENT] All right.
[CELL PHONE BUZZING]
Hey.
- [ANUJ] Hey. Have you seen it yet?
- Seen what?
You're You're on TV. I just
sent it to you. Click the link.
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING]
What could go Wong?
What could go Wong?
[AUDIENCE LAUGHING, CHEERING]
- [AUDIENCE APPLAUDS]
- [HOST] Tell us, Jamie, what was it like
playing such an unforgettable
role for so many years?
You know, uh, in those days,
people who look like me
weren't on television.
So I'm very grateful for
the opportunity. I still am.
I mean, Freddy Wong bought me a duplex.
[ALL LAUGH]
You became a landlord? That's ironic.
Is that why you walked away from acting?
I actually bought it for my parents.
But I didn't walk away from acting.
I just walked away from Hollywood.
Interesting. And why's that?
Well, after the show ended,
I thought, you know, a lot of
opportunities would have opened up,
just like the way it
did for a lot of people.
Yeah. The industry can be
hard on everyone. [CHUCKLES]
Sweetie, I think he
was talking about us.
No, no. [CHUCKLES] It's not just you.
It's the whole system.
The only parts that I got
offered were nerds and neighbors.
[CHUCKLES] And, sometimes, ninjas.
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
And what kinds of roles were
you looking for at the time?
I mean, I wanted to play the hero.
It's every kid's dream, right?
So you're saying the people at
Batman never called? [CHUCKLES]
[AUDIENCE LAUGHS]
You know, I I teach classical
theater to college kids,
and and we talk
about character a lot.
When I say I wanted to play a hero,
I mean I just wanted to be
someone who goes on a journey.
Shows some courage. Helps others.
A hero can be a person with superpowers
or they can just be
can be someone who fights
for something that matters.
[SHAKILY] My parents were heroes.
But as I said, people like
that weren't on TV back then.
Well, hopefully that's changing.
I hope so.
And I hope that there's a
kid out there watching this
who feels he doesn't
have to be a punch line.
Who believes that he can be the hero.
Jin.
Mr. and Mrs. Wang, thank
you for coming. Shall we?
As I mentioned on the phone,
this is Jin's second
altercation this year.
Uh, a couple of weeks ago,
he tackled a fellow
member of the soccer team.
We are very sorry about
that. It is not like our son.
Well, you know, in my experience,
these kinds of incidents tend to
indicate something going on at home.
So have there been any recent changes?
No. Everything's normal.
Okay. Well, that's good to hear.
Maybe it's because
Jin is having puberty?
- Mom.
- You are. It's okay.
- Oh, my God.
- Yeah. Cou Could be hormonal.
Um, correct me if I'm wrong, Mrs. Wang,
but you spend a lot of time with Jin.
- Is that right?
- Yes.
Um, because I recently read
a book about how parents,
particularly mothers within
your community, tend to operate.
So, do you think that maybe, um,
Jin is crying out for more affection?
I'm sorry?
I just think that kids
like Jin, you know,
might be starved for more
positive reinforcement.
Kids like Jin?
I also read that, um, families like
yours are very achievement-based,
which is good, it's
very good, up to a point.
- I'm sorry, I'm confused.
- [JIN] Mom.
- Yeah You can
- [MRS. WANG] He
You know what? [STAMMERING]
This This is good.
This is, um, a wonderful opportunity
for us to P.L.O.T. together.
Can we try that?
- Plot?
- Yeah, P.L.O.T.
It is a cultural sensitivity strategy
that I recently picked
up at a conference.
So, um "Pay attention. Look
for nonverbal cues." Right?
"Offer feedback. Take turns responding."
P.L.O.T. It's very fun.
Principal Kinney, I give
Jin a lot of attention
and I also push him, and I
think it's a good balance.
Well, Mrs. Wang, um,
with all due respect,
I don't think that it is a good
balance because your son is acting out.
- But, sometimes, kids act out, so
- I'm just trying to
I'm just trying to get to the bottom
of what is actually going on here.
Jin's a teenager. I think
that's what's going on. And
- This feels different.
- Because our son is different.
Because our family is different.
My wife is tough on my son
because she believes in him.
She pushes him because
she knows he can take it.
We are achievement-based
because we have to be.
I'm not defending Jin's behavior.
But, yes, we are dealing
with some issues at home.
And, I'm sorry, but your
books and your card
[STAMMERS] has
nothing to do with us.
And, you should know, my wife is
the best mother you will ever meet.
- Mr. Wang, I'm
- [SCOFFS]
If you were really paying attention,
you would know our
last name is not "Wang."
It's "Wong."
Hmm.
I feel good.
- I feel very good about this.
- [SLAPS BOOK]
- [DEAD BOLT TURNS]
- [HINGES SCREECH]
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
[NIU MOWANG] Looks like your
boy's not coming after all.
It's a shame.
[GRUNTING, PANTING]
[SUN WUKONG GROANING]
[GROANING]
[PANTING]
Mowang.
Speak up.
- There's something you should know.
- [NIU MOWANG] Oh, yeah?
Then please enlighten me with your
wisdom [CHUCKLES] Great Sage.
I'm sorry.
- What did you just say?
- I'm so sorry.
I failed you when you needed me most.
I left you. [PANTING]
[WHISPERING] I always knew you
were a shape-shifter, Wukong,
but the day you took everything
away from me, I realized something.
I was the one who needed a
change. And that's what I did.
So you don't need to apologize.
In many ways, you
made me who I am today.
[PANTING]
[NIU MOWANG CHUCKLES]
[WEI-CHEN] Hey, you.
What are you laughing at?
[GASPS]
[SIGHS]
[MRS. WANG SIGHS]
Hey, we'll talk about
this later tonight, huh?
I thought you were going to
Auntie Elaine's for a few days.
[BELL RINGS]
[STUDENTS CHATTERING]
Go to class, Jin.
Where's the pendant?
I want my father first.
That's not how this works.
Stop messing around, kid.
Just show us the bling.
You don't have it, do you?
Is there even a Fourth Scroll at all?
I'm not here to talk
about the Fourth Scroll.
So you took the staff, came down
to Earth and caused all of this,
and you still have no idea
if this thing even exists.
[CHUCKLES] Wow.
You must be so proud of your son.
[BREATHING HEAVILY]
Now, don't be ashamed.
You know how your dad got the staff?
He stole it.
That's right. He's no
better than any of us.
And now that I know that
you have nothing to offer,
there's no reason for
me not to kill you both.
[SHOUTS]
[BOTH GRUNTING, STRAINING]
[BOTH GRUNTING]
[NIU MOWANG SHOUTS]
[SHOUTS]
[GROANS]
[IN MANDARIN] You going
back to the office?
Mm-hmm.
You leaving for your sister's?
I don't know.
Thank you.
[SIMON GRUNTS]
For what you said in the office.
That was nice. Thank you.
[CRYING]
Why are you crying?
[SNIFFLES, INHALES]
I want our son to be successful.
But I'm failing my own life.
- You're not failing.
- [SNIFFLES]
I'm borrowing money
from my younger sister.
[MRS. WANG SNIFFLES]
You asked me once what
happened to the guy you married.
[SNIFFLES]
But what happened to the girl I married?
The girl who loved singing.
[CHUCKLING] The girl who
laughed at the top of her lungs.
The girl who was so bold
she came here with nothing
She turned into a housewife
[IN MANDARIN] She
drives a station wagon.
And got lost in house chores.
And then she gave all our
money to an old herbalist.
[SIGHS]
[SNIFFLES]
That old herbalist believed in me.
And it felt good.
I have to buy some groceries.
think you can challenge me
when I have Jīngū Bàng?
[GROANING] You may
hold it in your hands,
but you will never know how
to use it like my father.
You're right. I have
much bigger plans for it.
I'll give you one last chance.
Join us, or die trying to be a hero.
[BOTH GRUNT]
[NIU MOWANG SCREAMS, GRUNTS]
You already have Wukong. You
don't need to hurt the boy.
Look who finally sobered up.
[JI GONG GASPS]
Do it!
[GRUNTS]
[JI GONG GRUNTS] Whoa!
- [SUN WUKONG PANTING,
GRUNTING] - [WEI-CHEN GRUNTING]
[PANTING]
[BOTH GRUNT, GROAN]
[GROANS, COUGHS]
You're the one who wasted
my time on the Fourth Scroll
with these stupid paintings.
- [GRUNTS]
- No!
What are you doing?
[SHOUTING] No! Stop!
Please! I'm begging you.
[NIU MOWANG SHOUTS]
- [METALLIC THUD]
- [GROANING, COUGHING]
[GRUNTS]
[GROANS]
[GRUNTS]
[GRUNTS]
- [WEI-CHEN] No!
- [JI GONG] Let's go!
- [GRUNTS]
- [IN MANDARIN] Dad!
It's too late. Come on!
[WEI-CHEN, JI GONG STRAINING]
[WEI-CHEN GROANING]
You can't save him! Save yourself!
- [NIU MOWANG SHOUTS]
- [EXPLOSION]