Little Mosque on the Prairie (2007) s01e07 Episode Script
Mother-in-Law
Oh you better scrab that table until grandma can see her reflection in it.
Witches even have reflections? Hello guess who's here? Careful with those bags, Yasir.
Oh please don't take any trouble on my account.
Oh good, you haven't.
Yasir! Mother Hamudi, how was your flight? Rayyan, so beautiful, you're looking more like me everyday.
- How's your heart? - Oh thank you for asking don't ask.
Is there anything we can get you? Another big screen TV, another washer dryer maybe? - You know there is something.
- I knew it, you're hungry.
I brought my own food.
But Sarah has been baking all day.
No wonder you've lost weight.
- These are you favourite.
- Lebanese donuts! You just can't find anything like these around here.
Except donuts.
Nobody makes Awwamath like your cousin Samira.
- You should've married Samira.
- Oh, that's why I'm here.
Her husband just died.
That poor woman is all alone in the world now.
I'm so sorry mama, I would marry Samira, but I'm afraid, Sarah won't give me the divorce.
Yasir, don't be cruel, you don't have to divorce Sarah.
Samira will be your second wife.
S01E07 : Mother-in-law vost english Transcript : [dx.]
Synch : [dx.]
- Pasbel Ortho : Till Vidsrc : PROPER.
HDTV.
XviD-FBN She has really gone to the deep end this time, I mean, can you believe it? A second wife? You've gotta fight back, find a second husband.
I mean, let this Samira marry some Lebanese guy.
Yasir is some Lebanese guy I mean, you should see Yasir with his mother.
"Can I get you another cup of tea?" "Can I run you a bath? Can I rub your feet?" - It's like a - like a spa! Yasir wanna marry me? You know I'm not talking about this anymore.
You know, then she had the nerves to tell me I had skinny hair, do I have skinny hair? Yeah, you do.
Are you absolutely sure you wanna go through with this because we might get some flack.
Mercy's a small town.
We're sure, we've even written our vows in rhyming couplets.
What do you think ? "I promise to honour, but not obey, except on leather fetish day.
" Ok, well, we'll see you Sunday.
One wedding coming up, reception and funeral to follow.
- Ok, bye bye.
- Bye bye.
You're not gonna marry two guys in my church.
Hum, what happened to "knock knock, hello"? What happened to the "saintety of marriage, hello"? Saintety? You've been divorced three times! Ok, who's forcing you to do this? It's the gay mafia? Nobody's forcing me to do anything, this is entirely a matter of conscience.
It sure makes no sense, how can you have a conscience and be gay? You know I appreciate loudly debates as much as the next man, even when the next man happens to be you, Joe.
I can talk to the people Magee, you're gonna loose your congregation.
I hope not, because in times like these, we all need to reach out to each other with understanding.
So, it's off then? No, I'm gonna perform the ceremony this Sunday, come hell or high water.
God can do both.
Boy, where is the imam? That would be me.
You can't be the imam, you don't even have a beard.
Oh I do, it just usually shows around five o' clock.
What can I do for you, sister? I need you to perform a marriage.
How nice, finding love at your age.
Well not for me, for my son.
Because that invoice has already been paid, yes, absolutely.
second wife I have to go! Unfortunately, poligamy is illegal in this country.
- It can be our little secret.
- I don't really like breaking the law.
unless of course it's those tags on those new pillows, those are irresistible.
If the second marriage isn't registered, you're not breaking any laws.
Maybe I should speak to your son about this, how can I get a hold of him? What's wrong with you? His office is right over there! You're mother Hamudi! Well of course I am, who did you think I was? I'm sorry, welcome to our mosque.
Let's get back to business.
Yes, you must be so tired, you want that I take you home.
I'm not done arranging the wedding.
Oh, I'll take care of that, you wait in the car, I'll be right there.
Well, it's that what you want? Yes, yes yes.
A second wife? Sarah's gonna be furious.
She's a very reasonnable woman, she understands my mother is old and traditional and yes, she's furious! She's what am I supposed to do? Well, it's time to look inside your pantleg Hey, where are you going with this? and find your foot, to put it down.
I couldn't agree more.
Yes, I'm just trying to find the right way to say NO! How about "NO!"? Another muffin? I'll never forgive myself, but Jesus will, bring it on.
Magee, first you let the muslims in, now two firms are getting hitched at Mercy Anglican.
- I'm shocked! - You didn't know about this? Oh, I knew about it, I just had no idea you could read.
Marriage is a sacred institution, reverend, this is an affront.
Where is it all gonna end, huh? With peace and tolerance amongst all men.
Hippy! Toodles, thanks Fatima.
Eek.
Ok, you have to choose between her and me.
Darling, you know you're the only one for me and even if I were to marry Samira, I'd only have to think about.
Not Samira, your mother! Do not make a lie of this, end it now.
I will! Oh you mean, now now? I don't mean after your wedding now! Right, I'm gonna go home for lunch right now, and it's the very first thing I'm going to say to her.
Mamma, let me make you a nice sandwich, I'll cut the tomatoes just like you like it.
Samira would cook for you, her couscous is heavenly, it tastes like angel droppings.
Mmh, my favourite type of droppings.
Mama, I have something I need to tell you.
I can't marry her! What, you already have three wives I don't know about? - No.
- Then it's allowed.
But it's my life and I should be able to decide.
Oh the pain, the pain! Mama, help! You're fine, we could foxtrot to the beat of your heart.
I have been watching way too much "Dancing with the stars" lately.
After I die, I don't want your mother washing my body.
I'm sure she'll be heartbroken, but you're not going to die.
You're just suffering from a little indigestion.
You're protecting me.
She's anything to be ok? She's gonna outlive us both.
Even if it kills us.
So, they're performing gay marriages over at Mercy Anglican, our lady of the holy fruit.
What kind of man performs a gay marriage anyway, huh? Someone very intimate, undoubtedly intented with the gay lifestyle? Who knows what other secrets are lurking in the closets of Mercy Listen to that, he hates gays and muslims, and we thought he was a one-trick pony.
You're sure you wanna do this? I've baptised Johnny, to turn my back on him now would be a sin.
What would you do? Wow, this is definitely outside the muslim definition of marriage.
Amaar, you must call Magee this very instant.
Oh, well done.
Now tell him that a muslim congregation can't share a building with a tutti frutti priest.
Marrying two men doesn't make me gay, it doesn't even make me that happy, but it seems like to be the right thing to do.
Don't make us give you your notice.
Baber, you're forgetting, we're the tenants, he's the landlord.
Well, then we will have to give ourselves our notice.
Well, when you two figure it out, let me know, I'll be in my office.
Look, we're not going to leave, and even if we wanted to, you wouldn't be able to find a mosque, it took Yasir a year to find this place! Yasir is lazy, I can find us a mosque, just like that.
What can I get you today, Johnny? I wanna order some curry.
Comin' up! Oh no, it's for my wedding reception.
I'll gather the marriage once you'll find a nice girl.
Fatima, you got me shocked, I thought you got over the whole homo thing by your second aquafit class.
I like you, but there are rules I can't break.
Oh well, that's the way it's gonna be, I guess I'll have to go to the Mercy Diner.
For curry? Well it's not as good as yours, but if we can't have the best I don't approve of homosexuality, but I hate the Mercy Diner! I'll get you a menu by the end of the day.
I love you Fatima! if that's allowed by grumpy old Islam.
How are you today, mother Hamudi? The pain in the hip help me forget the pain in the knee.
How nice of you to ask! I'm always there for you, mother Hamudi.
Wait a minute, why are you being so nice to me? I don't understand why you're being so nice to me! - Aah, my two fav - You haven't told her yet, have you? I'm working up to it Yasir's marrying Samira.
- Yasir?! - I told her, but then she had a mild heart attack.
Well, then tell her again, finish the job.
Yasir's the man of the house, he's made up his mind.
- Whoa, I haven't decided anything yet! - What is there to decide? Sarah, you know I love you, please, don't go away dont, no, no Sarah, nooooo ! Some people can't just take no for an answer.
Hi.
I love an office with that lift and law.
Sorry, I had to sleep here.
Oh, wife number two's night? No, I've put an end to that poligamy nonsense, I'm out.
At last, I never thought that all muslim thing was working for you.
No, Anne, I'm still a muslim.
Which is wonderful, because it's your faith, and you believe in it and it's good stuff.
But seriously, how long are you gonna sleep in my office? Untill Yasir stands up to his mother.
Good thing I'm running for a third term.
Yes that's right, we want to rent a hall, for a mosque.
No, not mask, mosque, where muslims worship Allah Hello? The price is right and they like the neighborhood the garage? Well, that's ok.
We have to share it with your band? What is it? Upstairs from adult XXX video, perhaps you could tell me something, I always wondered, do the Xs stands for hugs, or kisses? What happened to reason? Why should taking a second wife cause so much bother? Poligamy is a dying tradition.
Even in countries where it's legal, very few muslim men take a second wife.
Seriously, how many wives did your husband have? - I was more than enough for my husband.
- Yes, I can believe that grandma - Yasir's special, he needs a real wife.
- Grandma? Sarah is not my favourite person, she's a bad muslim, - a lousy mother - Do you have a point here? but she's the only wife for Yasir.
Thank you Fatima.
What's wrong with you two, are you feminists? - Salam aleikum, Baber.
- Waleikum salam.
Oh, finally a muslim man that looks like a muslim man.
Baber, you remember my grandmother? Sister Hamudi! Did you fly here by time machine? Because you look so much younger than the last time I saw you.
Calm down Romeo, first we'll get my son married, then you and I will talk.
No, I am not looking for a wife, I was looking for a new mosque.
What's wrong with the one we have? We can't have a mosque in a church full of drag queers.
It's queens, drag queens.
Whatever they are, we have to protest, - I need your help Fatima.
- I can't, I'm serving the food at the wedding.
You're gathering this abomination? That's an abomination! Good food is a point of pride at a wedding.
Gay pride, it should be gay ashamed ! Am I in a parallel universe? You're praying, what's wrong? The love of my life, since I was 20, walked out of me for no good reason.
Other than the extra toothbrush that's pooping into your bathroom.
Allright How am I gonna get out of this? The Coran is a perfect solution for you.
Say no to your mother.
Fair enough, yes, it's an excellent plan B, now what about plan A? Too bad you and Sarah didn't have a prenuptial agreement excluding poligamy.
We can draw one up right now.
You can dig deep in that ex-lawyer brain of yours and drain up some latin mumbo-jumbo.
Here's some latin mumbo-jumbo for you, pre means before, - the law isn't retroactive.
- Not even Islamic law? Especially not Islamic law.
And now, at Mercy Anglican, the same institution that welcomed terrorists, is opening its backdoor to another evil, an evil that could very well undermine our way of life.
Queer marriage Wake up people! Now let's go to our live coverage down the legion, where we're raising funds for the neutered cat for a kid who can't campaign.
If you want a sign, you take if trom there.
Oh, it's you.
Can I help you with something? We heard you were planning a demonstration on Sunday? Yeah, against the abomination.
Oh, I thought against gay marriage.
Yes, gay marriage, it's like saying abomination.
Abomination, me too.
- Abomination.
- Abomination.
- Abomination.
- Abomination.
Oh, very good.
- Like the first two - Abomination.
Yasir Drinking tea from your inbox, is that a Lebanese tradition? It's just a little experiment.
Pre-marriage contract, Yasir, this is deceitful, I can't be a part of this.
Fine, but as long as you don't tell anyone, it's an imam-client privilege.
- Hi,mom.
- Oh, hi.
Ok, I brought what you've asked for but I think you should come home.
Thank you darling, let's see.
Fresh handies, jammies, shampoo What's missing? Oh yeah, your father and his mother perfect! Common' mom, he'll stand up to her - eventually.
- And I'll come home, eventually.
I thought you were going home tonight, she asked hopefully.
- I never said that.
- So say it now.
She's right mom, you should go home to dad, he loves you.
Unless, you wanna stay at my house, go ahead, leave your husband, just like I did.
And neither of us will have sex ever again! Ok fine, you win, I'll go home.
But he's on the couch.
Have you seen these? We'll give 'em some to protest.
You're a great man, reverend Magee, but we've talked and we can't let you do this.
What do you mean? I haven't been this pumped-up for a brass since we took on the Franciscan flyers in the field hockey.
I'm sorry, we've made up our mind.
Love is worth fighting for, you can't cancel the wedding.
Oh no, we're not cancelling it.
We're having it in Toronto.
Oh, we found this fabulous church, spa and massage included.
Toronto? Oh, you people are all alike.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I understand, hating Toronto can cloud anyone's judgement.
Common' honey Bye bye.
I'm sorry mama, but it's all there in the pre-nuptial.
It smells.
I had it in my socks drawer.
Like Earl Grey.
Next to some tea bags.
That put an end to it, I can't marry Samira.
Oh, thank you Yasir.
You came back to me.
Yasir! Common', let's go for a walk.
You're a doctor, Can you walk when your heart have been broken into a million pieces? Scattered into the dark, spat on and then kicked into the gutter? As long as you wear sensible shoes, yes.
I told you, they went to Toronto.
Thank you.
Oh, you're just saying that to throw up their scent, their perfumed scent.
Actually that's me, this month's jogging today had a cold time.
You should go and take your signs with you, every little bit hurts.
There's really nobody inside? Baber, I wish I could tell you the church is filled with gay people.
He really does.
This is stupid, I'm going home.
Joe, there'll be other days, other sinners.
- Common', I'll buy you a beer.
- Muslim! Can you even buy me a beer? It looks like the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
Oh darling, you bake, I get excited.
Now, look.
See, empty, empty, no other wives.
Aren't you sorry to have doubted of me? No, sometimes I'm sorry I've married you, like when I read this.
Ah yeah, I choose this, because I knew it would close the issue forever, my mother has Calm down, calm down, I've read the contract and it's not bad! I knew you'd understand.
- I even added a few clauses.
- I see.
Anything for you darling, for you - laundry every week? - Non negociable.
Cleaning up the garage? But everything in the garage has a use! No, non negociable.
Chick flick Fridays Yeah, we'll start with The Notebook.
Ok, this last clause You're not up to it? I think it might need some practice darling, to get it right.
Well then you better get right on it then.
Right now? After all darling, a contract is a contract.
[FS.]
-- Transcript : [dx.]
Synch : [dx.]
- Pasbel // Ortho : Till
Witches even have reflections? Hello guess who's here? Careful with those bags, Yasir.
Oh please don't take any trouble on my account.
Oh good, you haven't.
Yasir! Mother Hamudi, how was your flight? Rayyan, so beautiful, you're looking more like me everyday.
- How's your heart? - Oh thank you for asking don't ask.
Is there anything we can get you? Another big screen TV, another washer dryer maybe? - You know there is something.
- I knew it, you're hungry.
I brought my own food.
But Sarah has been baking all day.
No wonder you've lost weight.
- These are you favourite.
- Lebanese donuts! You just can't find anything like these around here.
Except donuts.
Nobody makes Awwamath like your cousin Samira.
- You should've married Samira.
- Oh, that's why I'm here.
Her husband just died.
That poor woman is all alone in the world now.
I'm so sorry mama, I would marry Samira, but I'm afraid, Sarah won't give me the divorce.
Yasir, don't be cruel, you don't have to divorce Sarah.
Samira will be your second wife.
S01E07 : Mother-in-law vost english Transcript : [dx.]
Synch : [dx.]
- Pasbel Ortho : Till Vidsrc : PROPER.
HDTV.
XviD-FBN She has really gone to the deep end this time, I mean, can you believe it? A second wife? You've gotta fight back, find a second husband.
I mean, let this Samira marry some Lebanese guy.
Yasir is some Lebanese guy I mean, you should see Yasir with his mother.
"Can I get you another cup of tea?" "Can I run you a bath? Can I rub your feet?" - It's like a - like a spa! Yasir wanna marry me? You know I'm not talking about this anymore.
You know, then she had the nerves to tell me I had skinny hair, do I have skinny hair? Yeah, you do.
Are you absolutely sure you wanna go through with this because we might get some flack.
Mercy's a small town.
We're sure, we've even written our vows in rhyming couplets.
What do you think ? "I promise to honour, but not obey, except on leather fetish day.
" Ok, well, we'll see you Sunday.
One wedding coming up, reception and funeral to follow.
- Ok, bye bye.
- Bye bye.
You're not gonna marry two guys in my church.
Hum, what happened to "knock knock, hello"? What happened to the "saintety of marriage, hello"? Saintety? You've been divorced three times! Ok, who's forcing you to do this? It's the gay mafia? Nobody's forcing me to do anything, this is entirely a matter of conscience.
It sure makes no sense, how can you have a conscience and be gay? You know I appreciate loudly debates as much as the next man, even when the next man happens to be you, Joe.
I can talk to the people Magee, you're gonna loose your congregation.
I hope not, because in times like these, we all need to reach out to each other with understanding.
So, it's off then? No, I'm gonna perform the ceremony this Sunday, come hell or high water.
God can do both.
Boy, where is the imam? That would be me.
You can't be the imam, you don't even have a beard.
Oh I do, it just usually shows around five o' clock.
What can I do for you, sister? I need you to perform a marriage.
How nice, finding love at your age.
Well not for me, for my son.
Because that invoice has already been paid, yes, absolutely.
second wife I have to go! Unfortunately, poligamy is illegal in this country.
- It can be our little secret.
- I don't really like breaking the law.
unless of course it's those tags on those new pillows, those are irresistible.
If the second marriage isn't registered, you're not breaking any laws.
Maybe I should speak to your son about this, how can I get a hold of him? What's wrong with you? His office is right over there! You're mother Hamudi! Well of course I am, who did you think I was? I'm sorry, welcome to our mosque.
Let's get back to business.
Yes, you must be so tired, you want that I take you home.
I'm not done arranging the wedding.
Oh, I'll take care of that, you wait in the car, I'll be right there.
Well, it's that what you want? Yes, yes yes.
A second wife? Sarah's gonna be furious.
She's a very reasonnable woman, she understands my mother is old and traditional and yes, she's furious! She's what am I supposed to do? Well, it's time to look inside your pantleg Hey, where are you going with this? and find your foot, to put it down.
I couldn't agree more.
Yes, I'm just trying to find the right way to say NO! How about "NO!"? Another muffin? I'll never forgive myself, but Jesus will, bring it on.
Magee, first you let the muslims in, now two firms are getting hitched at Mercy Anglican.
- I'm shocked! - You didn't know about this? Oh, I knew about it, I just had no idea you could read.
Marriage is a sacred institution, reverend, this is an affront.
Where is it all gonna end, huh? With peace and tolerance amongst all men.
Hippy! Toodles, thanks Fatima.
Eek.
Ok, you have to choose between her and me.
Darling, you know you're the only one for me and even if I were to marry Samira, I'd only have to think about.
Not Samira, your mother! Do not make a lie of this, end it now.
I will! Oh you mean, now now? I don't mean after your wedding now! Right, I'm gonna go home for lunch right now, and it's the very first thing I'm going to say to her.
Mamma, let me make you a nice sandwich, I'll cut the tomatoes just like you like it.
Samira would cook for you, her couscous is heavenly, it tastes like angel droppings.
Mmh, my favourite type of droppings.
Mama, I have something I need to tell you.
I can't marry her! What, you already have three wives I don't know about? - No.
- Then it's allowed.
But it's my life and I should be able to decide.
Oh the pain, the pain! Mama, help! You're fine, we could foxtrot to the beat of your heart.
I have been watching way too much "Dancing with the stars" lately.
After I die, I don't want your mother washing my body.
I'm sure she'll be heartbroken, but you're not going to die.
You're just suffering from a little indigestion.
You're protecting me.
She's anything to be ok? She's gonna outlive us both.
Even if it kills us.
So, they're performing gay marriages over at Mercy Anglican, our lady of the holy fruit.
What kind of man performs a gay marriage anyway, huh? Someone very intimate, undoubtedly intented with the gay lifestyle? Who knows what other secrets are lurking in the closets of Mercy Listen to that, he hates gays and muslims, and we thought he was a one-trick pony.
You're sure you wanna do this? I've baptised Johnny, to turn my back on him now would be a sin.
What would you do? Wow, this is definitely outside the muslim definition of marriage.
Amaar, you must call Magee this very instant.
Oh, well done.
Now tell him that a muslim congregation can't share a building with a tutti frutti priest.
Marrying two men doesn't make me gay, it doesn't even make me that happy, but it seems like to be the right thing to do.
Don't make us give you your notice.
Baber, you're forgetting, we're the tenants, he's the landlord.
Well, then we will have to give ourselves our notice.
Well, when you two figure it out, let me know, I'll be in my office.
Look, we're not going to leave, and even if we wanted to, you wouldn't be able to find a mosque, it took Yasir a year to find this place! Yasir is lazy, I can find us a mosque, just like that.
What can I get you today, Johnny? I wanna order some curry.
Comin' up! Oh no, it's for my wedding reception.
I'll gather the marriage once you'll find a nice girl.
Fatima, you got me shocked, I thought you got over the whole homo thing by your second aquafit class.
I like you, but there are rules I can't break.
Oh well, that's the way it's gonna be, I guess I'll have to go to the Mercy Diner.
For curry? Well it's not as good as yours, but if we can't have the best I don't approve of homosexuality, but I hate the Mercy Diner! I'll get you a menu by the end of the day.
I love you Fatima! if that's allowed by grumpy old Islam.
How are you today, mother Hamudi? The pain in the hip help me forget the pain in the knee.
How nice of you to ask! I'm always there for you, mother Hamudi.
Wait a minute, why are you being so nice to me? I don't understand why you're being so nice to me! - Aah, my two fav - You haven't told her yet, have you? I'm working up to it Yasir's marrying Samira.
- Yasir?! - I told her, but then she had a mild heart attack.
Well, then tell her again, finish the job.
Yasir's the man of the house, he's made up his mind.
- Whoa, I haven't decided anything yet! - What is there to decide? Sarah, you know I love you, please, don't go away dont, no, no Sarah, nooooo ! Some people can't just take no for an answer.
Hi.
I love an office with that lift and law.
Sorry, I had to sleep here.
Oh, wife number two's night? No, I've put an end to that poligamy nonsense, I'm out.
At last, I never thought that all muslim thing was working for you.
No, Anne, I'm still a muslim.
Which is wonderful, because it's your faith, and you believe in it and it's good stuff.
But seriously, how long are you gonna sleep in my office? Untill Yasir stands up to his mother.
Good thing I'm running for a third term.
Yes that's right, we want to rent a hall, for a mosque.
No, not mask, mosque, where muslims worship Allah Hello? The price is right and they like the neighborhood the garage? Well, that's ok.
We have to share it with your band? What is it? Upstairs from adult XXX video, perhaps you could tell me something, I always wondered, do the Xs stands for hugs, or kisses? What happened to reason? Why should taking a second wife cause so much bother? Poligamy is a dying tradition.
Even in countries where it's legal, very few muslim men take a second wife.
Seriously, how many wives did your husband have? - I was more than enough for my husband.
- Yes, I can believe that grandma - Yasir's special, he needs a real wife.
- Grandma? Sarah is not my favourite person, she's a bad muslim, - a lousy mother - Do you have a point here? but she's the only wife for Yasir.
Thank you Fatima.
What's wrong with you two, are you feminists? - Salam aleikum, Baber.
- Waleikum salam.
Oh, finally a muslim man that looks like a muslim man.
Baber, you remember my grandmother? Sister Hamudi! Did you fly here by time machine? Because you look so much younger than the last time I saw you.
Calm down Romeo, first we'll get my son married, then you and I will talk.
No, I am not looking for a wife, I was looking for a new mosque.
What's wrong with the one we have? We can't have a mosque in a church full of drag queers.
It's queens, drag queens.
Whatever they are, we have to protest, - I need your help Fatima.
- I can't, I'm serving the food at the wedding.
You're gathering this abomination? That's an abomination! Good food is a point of pride at a wedding.
Gay pride, it should be gay ashamed ! Am I in a parallel universe? You're praying, what's wrong? The love of my life, since I was 20, walked out of me for no good reason.
Other than the extra toothbrush that's pooping into your bathroom.
Allright How am I gonna get out of this? The Coran is a perfect solution for you.
Say no to your mother.
Fair enough, yes, it's an excellent plan B, now what about plan A? Too bad you and Sarah didn't have a prenuptial agreement excluding poligamy.
We can draw one up right now.
You can dig deep in that ex-lawyer brain of yours and drain up some latin mumbo-jumbo.
Here's some latin mumbo-jumbo for you, pre means before, - the law isn't retroactive.
- Not even Islamic law? Especially not Islamic law.
And now, at Mercy Anglican, the same institution that welcomed terrorists, is opening its backdoor to another evil, an evil that could very well undermine our way of life.
Queer marriage Wake up people! Now let's go to our live coverage down the legion, where we're raising funds for the neutered cat for a kid who can't campaign.
If you want a sign, you take if trom there.
Oh, it's you.
Can I help you with something? We heard you were planning a demonstration on Sunday? Yeah, against the abomination.
Oh, I thought against gay marriage.
Yes, gay marriage, it's like saying abomination.
Abomination, me too.
- Abomination.
- Abomination.
- Abomination.
- Abomination.
Oh, very good.
- Like the first two - Abomination.
Yasir Drinking tea from your inbox, is that a Lebanese tradition? It's just a little experiment.
Pre-marriage contract, Yasir, this is deceitful, I can't be a part of this.
Fine, but as long as you don't tell anyone, it's an imam-client privilege.
- Hi,mom.
- Oh, hi.
Ok, I brought what you've asked for but I think you should come home.
Thank you darling, let's see.
Fresh handies, jammies, shampoo What's missing? Oh yeah, your father and his mother perfect! Common' mom, he'll stand up to her - eventually.
- And I'll come home, eventually.
I thought you were going home tonight, she asked hopefully.
- I never said that.
- So say it now.
She's right mom, you should go home to dad, he loves you.
Unless, you wanna stay at my house, go ahead, leave your husband, just like I did.
And neither of us will have sex ever again! Ok fine, you win, I'll go home.
But he's on the couch.
Have you seen these? We'll give 'em some to protest.
You're a great man, reverend Magee, but we've talked and we can't let you do this.
What do you mean? I haven't been this pumped-up for a brass since we took on the Franciscan flyers in the field hockey.
I'm sorry, we've made up our mind.
Love is worth fighting for, you can't cancel the wedding.
Oh no, we're not cancelling it.
We're having it in Toronto.
Oh, we found this fabulous church, spa and massage included.
Toronto? Oh, you people are all alike.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
I understand, hating Toronto can cloud anyone's judgement.
Common' honey Bye bye.
I'm sorry mama, but it's all there in the pre-nuptial.
It smells.
I had it in my socks drawer.
Like Earl Grey.
Next to some tea bags.
That put an end to it, I can't marry Samira.
Oh, thank you Yasir.
You came back to me.
Yasir! Common', let's go for a walk.
You're a doctor, Can you walk when your heart have been broken into a million pieces? Scattered into the dark, spat on and then kicked into the gutter? As long as you wear sensible shoes, yes.
I told you, they went to Toronto.
Thank you.
Oh, you're just saying that to throw up their scent, their perfumed scent.
Actually that's me, this month's jogging today had a cold time.
You should go and take your signs with you, every little bit hurts.
There's really nobody inside? Baber, I wish I could tell you the church is filled with gay people.
He really does.
This is stupid, I'm going home.
Joe, there'll be other days, other sinners.
- Common', I'll buy you a beer.
- Muslim! Can you even buy me a beer? It looks like the beginning of a beautiful friendship.
Oh darling, you bake, I get excited.
Now, look.
See, empty, empty, no other wives.
Aren't you sorry to have doubted of me? No, sometimes I'm sorry I've married you, like when I read this.
Ah yeah, I choose this, because I knew it would close the issue forever, my mother has Calm down, calm down, I've read the contract and it's not bad! I knew you'd understand.
- I even added a few clauses.
- I see.
Anything for you darling, for you - laundry every week? - Non negociable.
Cleaning up the garage? But everything in the garage has a use! No, non negociable.
Chick flick Fridays Yeah, we'll start with The Notebook.
Ok, this last clause You're not up to it? I think it might need some practice darling, to get it right.
Well then you better get right on it then.
Right now? After all darling, a contract is a contract.
[FS.]
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- Pasbel // Ortho : Till