Neon (2023) s01e07 Episode Script

1
["Corillo" playing]
[Santi singing] Yo! ♪
Quien va a estar pa mi
Cuando ya no haya na ♪
Cuando me caiga
Quien me va a levantar ♪
Cuando todas las luces
Se apaguen en la ciudad ♪
Quien me va a llamar ♪
Soy mujer independiente ♪
Los hombres ya no me importan
Porque estoy en la mía real ♪
Que rico se siente ♪
Ya no me importa lo que diga la gente ♪
Todas mis nenas está
Bailando reggaeton ♪
A todos los
Que se copian de mi flow ♪
Tengo dinero, siempre me robo el show ♪
Todas mis nenas están
Bailando reggaeton ♪
Nalgas hacia el piso ♪
[in Spanish] What madness.
[in English] She changed the lyrics,
now the song doesn't make sense.
[Felix] Sounds like a bop to me.
Santi's saying, "Quien va a estar pa mi
cuando ya no haya na,
cuando me caiga, quien me va a levantar."
[in English] And she goes,
"Soy mujer independiente
ya los hombres no me importan."
I know. It's so empowering.
Santi's saying, "Who's gonna be there
for me when I have nothing?"
And she goes, "I'm an independent woman
and men are not my worry."
Who cares? It's fine.
She's literally saying
she'll screw him over.
What do you guys think?
Yo, that was sick.
You fucking killed that.
- Thank you. Ness?
- [Ness chuckling]
- Honestly?
- Honestly.
Uh, I don't think that the song
is as powerful with Isa on the duet.
I see what's going on.
What?
You're upset that the song that I wrote
about you guys is now about Isa.
And, like, I get that.
But this is what's good for my career.
This is what's good for all of us.
Okay, no, that's not what I said at all.
What I'm saying is she changed the song
and now it is objectively worse.
I disagree.
But you know
what you can't disagree with me about?
Is that she's gonna make this song
number one in the fucking country.
This is the most exposure I'm ever
gonna get for my music, for my brand
and this is exactly why we moved to Miami.
This new song is so dope.
The label wants to debut it
in my New Year's special,
"New Año, New You."
- Stop!
- [Isa laughing]
Stop, there's no paparazzi here, okay?
[both laughing] Okay.
Celeste will be here any minute
to do the Rolling Stone cover story
about your romance.
Great. Let her know the following topics
are completely off-limits,
my age, my stance on world hunger,
my whereabouts from January
to September 2018, and my age.
- Okay, cool. I'm not your publicist, so
- And I won't discuss product lawsuits.
The packaging for my face wash
and cooking oil had to be similar.
It's called brand unity.
- Mmm-hmm.
- [keys tapping]
Mention the Daddy Yankee party.
- It's a huge set piece of my doc.
- [Santi] Mmm.
So we're going to the Daddy Yankee party.
You mean Daddy Yankee's epic party
celebrating the 20th anniversary release
of "Gasolina"
presented by Buchanan's Whisky?
- Don't know if I could remember all that.
- I'm gonna need you to be way better.
[cell phone chimes]
Okay, that's Celeste.
Are Are you guys ready?
Yeah, after you, chulita.
Oh, my God, chulita is so cute.
I'm gonna start to use that.
No, you gotta say chulito
because it's masculine.
Forget it, it's too much work.
[Javier singing "Cuando Llego"]
A la hora que yo llego prendo el party ♪
Calentando to'as las calles
Through Miami ♪
El billete te lo traigo
En el maletero ♪
Que me mira y se te cae el jean ♪
A la hora que yo llego
prendo el party ♪
Calentando to'as las calles
Through Miami ♪
[reggaeton song playing]
There he is. The Boricua Houdini. [laughs]
You look familiar. I seen you somewhere.
Oh, you own those birds, right?
Uh, no, I don't I don't know who that is,
but I used to work over at BPM.
Oh, you give out those bomb-ass quesitos
in the meetings.
- I did. I did.
- What can I do for you, quesito lady?
It's actually Mia.
- Mia quesito.
- [laughs]
It's very cute, um, but I wanna tell you
what I can do for you.
I wanna rep you. As your manager.
I already have a music manager.
Yeah, sure.
But do you have a magic manager?
Nah. [laughs] For real?
If I'm being honest,
your music is magic, but your magic?
That's like music to me.
You haven't even seen my latest trick.
You wanna hear about it?
- Yeah.
- Tell me if you fuck with it.
I pick somebody out of the audience.
- Uh-huh.
- I make them disappear,
but here's the twist,
I don't bring them back.
[laughing]
- You crazy. You a little crazy. [laughing]
- I knew it. I knew it.
Listen, this is the Javier
I want to represent.
The full you.
The musician and the magician.
The mugician.
Yeah, I can already see
the Vegas Residency.
"Javier Luna: The Sorcerer of Song."
Diablo.
See it?
- I'm down with that.
- Mmm. [laughs] Yeah.
- You going to that Daddy Yankee party?
- Yes.
See you there tomorrow then.
- [splutters] Of course. Of course. Okay.
- I'll see you there then.
- Tomorrow.
- I'll see you there.
- Okay.
- [laughing]
Tomorrow. All right.
- See you, quesito.
- Okay.
So, "Corillo" is a song about love
and that love is Is Isa's love.
- She's my little chulita.
- [chuckles]
Yeah, he's my little [splutters]
chuleta.
Your little pork chop?
- Yeah.
- [chuckles]
So, back to the music.
How are you feeling
about your live TV debut?
Well, I'm very excited,
but I don't take
any of this stuff lightly,
because not only it's the launch
of my music career,
but it's also the launch
of Isa's new sound, right?
- Yeah.
- [both laughing]
Speaking of her new sound,
Isa, I would I would love to hear more
about that sound.
And specifically your decision
to transition to the Latino market
after decades in pop. I mean, why now?
Well, to me,
reggaeton is about fully embracing
who you are culturally and creatively.
And for years, the industry
has tried to silence my voice.
And it was time
for me to take my voice back.
Wow, that's actually really beautiful.
Much like Ariel in The Little Mermaid,
who of course, I portrayed
in the 2012 Broadway production
up until the unfortunate accident
of the guy who played Flounder,
but it was legally not my fault,
so maybe, like, cut that out.
Um, how do you guys respond
to all of the allegations
that this entire relationship
is just a ploy to sell records?
- That'll be all for today.
- [Celeste] But
I'm getting an interview migraine.
But there was a lot more
that I'd like to cover
It was so good to see you, Molest.
It's Celeste, not Molest.
You have to know
that isn't anybody's name.
[Santi sighs]
- [Celeste] Okay.
- Gotta go.
I guess you do.
She's, um a lot. [chuckles]
Um, listen, thank you for the interview
and thank you for helping me get here.
No need to thank me.
You got here by yourself
and I'm really proud of you.
[Santi] Thank you.
Um
Catch you later?
Yeah, uh, have a good one.
[door opens]
[footsteps approaching]
You have a crush on the journalist?
What? No. No. I
I barely know who she is. She
She actually talked shit
on my first performance. She's
It's okay. We're all grown-ups.
But embarrass me?
And I will end you.
End you.
Like, dead.
["- Hate + Perreo" playing]
Guys, this is crazy.
- I'm about to meet Daddy fucking Yankee!
- [Ness laughs]
DY!
Yeah, maybe he'll bless you.
Like, the pope of reggaeton.
Yeah, no, this is good 'cause I don't
want you to just be known for dating Isa.
Santi should be known for talent,
not TMZ, right?
[car approaching]
- [Ness sighs]
- ["Shining All Night" playing]
Oh. Oh, sorry.
There's no room because my outfit
is really tight and I can't sit up.
So, yeah. Door.
- Oh. Okay.
- [car door shuts]
Okay.
Maybe I'll just get an Uber or something?
["Panties y Brassieres" playing]
[camera shutters clicking]
Holy fuck, this place
feels like reggaeton royalty.
It's like the Royal Wedding,
but if brown people were allowed.
I really wanna meet Daddy Yankee,
but I don't wanna bother him,
- but what if he leaves before I see him?
- You need to chill.
I am an empath
and I pick up on your energy, okay?
Hola! Hey!
["Ganas" playing]
[Felix] Ugh, everyone's so hot here.
I hope they have a bunch of backup hotties
at a second location
in case somebody bombs this one.
Like a Designated Survivor scenario.
Okay, if I can find Daddy Yankee
and get him to listen
to the original "Corillo"
and tell Santi that it is so much better
than this new one,
he has to believe him, right?
It's Daddy fucking Yankee.
- Right.
- Right.
Well, good luck with that.
I got a real job.
["ID" playing]
Hey, I'm Mia Morris.
Morris. Morris. Morris. I don't see
Don't worry about it.
I have the confirmation email right here.
That's a pickup order
for The Container Store.
Yes, it is.
[Oscar] This guy's paid,
so it's all taken care of.
- Mia!
- Hey!
- Ooh, Mia.
- [Mia laughing]
This is so, um, weird.
Not at all. No, not at all.
Oh, this is, um, my new Mia.
Jenna. Yes. You made me set up her email
after you fired me.
Right, right.
So, listen, no hard feelings.
If you ever need a rec or a favor,
just let me know.
I won't mention any of the
The crazy shit you pulled. [laughs]
[laughs] I mean, you can always
get me into this party.
Oh, wow, you really took me up on that.
Nah, nah, I can't do that.
But, uh, good to see you. Have a good one.
Come on, Janice.
[Mia sighs]
- You can go ahead, ma'am.
- For real?
I feel bad for you.
That was really hard to watch.
Okay. You could have just said
I could go in.
You probably get this all the time,
but my client's not No, um
I imagine you get this a lot, but, uh
I imagine you get this a lot,
but I work in brand management
and it's actually an exciting time
in the male enhancement space.
Picture this, "When the mood strikes you,
why not throw some 'Gasolina'
on your fire?" [laughs] Right?
- Hey, hi.
- [woman laughs]
I'm sorry.
I'm sure DY is loving hearing your pitch.
I just need to borrow him
for a quick second
because he has a really important
phone call from Barack Obama.
- Oh. Wow.
- [Ness] Yeah.
So, uh, it might be a while,
but thank you so much. [laughs]
- Thank you.
- [Ness and Daddy Yankee laughing]
[Daddy Yankee] Wow.
[laughing] I'm so sorry. I, uh
Hi, I just thought, um
Don't worry. Thank you for saving me.
Thank you.
[laughs] Okay. Oh, my God.
I can't believe I'm meeting you. That's
You know, I don't mean to fangirl,
but my, uh, favorite memory with my abuela
was dancing to "Barrio Fino"
when it first dropped.
I mean, we had to wheel her around,
but you get it, you know.
I love stories like that.
Thank you, again.
You're welcome. Um, you know,
my friend Santi, he idolizes you.
And he's a reggaetonero
and you are the reason
that he wrote his song "Exagerao."
Yeah, of course.
Eduardo's ♪
Yeah. Oh, my God. You know who he is.
[in Spanish] He's going to go crazy.
[in English] I'm always looking out
for new talent. That's my job.
You know, uh, let me send you his latest.
He has He has so much and he has
this new banger with Jota Rosa.
Do you want to listen to it?
Because, um Oh, no.
Did I turn into that annoying girl
that I saved you from?
Don't worry. I'll listen to it.
And you know what? Bring him over as well.
Oh, my fucking God. Okay, done.
You will not regret this, Daddy.
Oh, uh, Mr. Yankee.
Okay, I'm gonna go.
[laughs]
["Gasolina" playing]
[crowd cheering]
Hey, Felix.
- Hey.
- Come with me one sec.
Okay.
- How are you?
- I'm well. How are you?
Good, good, good.
I wanted to tell you
you're doing a good job on the doc.
It's so cute and artsy.
Oh, my God. That is actually a relief.
I thought you hated me
from how you look at me and talk to me.
So I was talking to my friend Lin
about the doc. Lin-Manuel Miranda.
- Do you know him?
- Oh, my God. Yeah.
He loved the idea of the doc.
Oh, my God, that's crazy. What a dream.
Yeah. So he's gonna be shooting it
from now on.
Oh, uh, well, I I love his work.
But a co-director,
I'd have to think about.
- But thank you.
- No. Not like co-director.
More like you're fired.
[laughs]
[Felix] Uh
Hey, Santi? Santi. Hey, uh, Isa's saying
some shit like I'm fired or something?
Sorry, bro,
but, I mean you understand? It's Lin.
I don't understand. Did you stand up
for me? Or what's going on?
Bro, I tried, but it's her doc, you know?
It's really not my place to be
Yeah, but this was my shot, and you
didn't put up a fight? Not one word?
- You're making a scene.
- Sorry.
You don't want me to embarrass you
in front of your friends?
These people fucking suck.
Look at his hat.
This fight is so basic.
I get that you're mad,
but please don't be selfish.
Selfish? This whole Isa thing is
Don't fucking touch me.
[Santi] What the fuck?
What the fuck with you?
Yo, what the fuck is going on?
Nothing.
He's so embarrassing.
Felix!
[Mia] Hey, Javi.
- Oh, shit! [kisses]
- [laughing]
I'm so happy you made it. Thank you.
Listen, you told me to come, so I'm here.
You know, I was thinking
You really made me think about fusing
my two passions together the other day.
And nobody's ever made me feel like that.
Thank you.
Of course, man. Listen, that's because
this industry is doing you a disservice.
When you work with me,
you'll never have to worry about that.
I'm not no inside-the-box type rep, okay?
Unless you trying to put me in a box
and cut me in half.
- I'm here for you, man.
- [both laugh]
No, this fit is too good.
I want you to rep me,
but I want you to rep the real me.
Javier Luna: Magician-Musician.
Hell yeah.
- Yeah?
- Ugh, thank you, man.
- Let's do it.
- You have no idea, man.
I appreciate this.
I'm not gonna let you down.
Oh, shit. Hold on a second, Mia, Oscar.
Oh!
- There he is. My guy.
- Papi, papi, mira.
I want to present to you my new manager.
Oscar's my label rep.
Ya'll guys are gonna be working
a lot together.
Mia, Oscar. Oscar, Mia.
Hey, man. Pleasure to meet you.
Yeah, what the fuck?
Oh, this guy. [laughs]
- I love this. Cheers.
- I see why you like him.
[exhales] Can't wait to get started
working with you, Omar.
Wait, hold on. Wait, wait, wait.
Okay, here.
I don't know what this is, but I'm in
no such mood. I just wanna go home.
Can you stop moping
and look around, please?
It's so beautiful.
You might not recognize
it in the daylight, but in the
- Moonlight?
- Yes.
[Felix sniffles]
Is this the beach from Moonlight?
It kind of seems like the perfect spot
for you to learn how to swim.
- No.
- Yes.
Yes, Felix. You have to
conquer your fear. It's time.
I'm not ready. I just
Thank you, but let's just sit
in the hand job spot and go home.
Felix.
This is the Moonlight beach.
We got to Moonlight.
Okay. Just relax your body.
More with your arms.
Up and over. Up and over.
See? You're floating.
- I'm barely holding on to you.
- [splutters]
- Felix! Wait, wait, wait. Stop.
- [screaming]
Okay, hold on. Relax, relax, relax.
You're floating, Felix!
[laughing]
["Dura" playing]
Celeste. [chuckles]
Well, shit, lucky me.
Here for the debut of Miami's
hottest celebrity couple, Isanti.
- Isanti? Okay.
- [laughs]
I like that. Did you come up with that?
Yeah, I am a writer, remember? [chuckles]
Right.
I'm here working.
Somebody's gotta tell the normies
what goes on inside the party of the year.
- Thank you for your service.
- Anytime. [chuckles]
You know, today's been kind of weird.
Uh, I got into it with Ness and Felix
and I feel like
Like I was kind of a dick.
Shit, I'm sorry.
Do you wanna talk about it?
Yeah, I would I would love that.
Do you wanna find something to eat?
There's never any fucking food
at these things.
Dude, I was just in VIP.
They have a feast.
They have steak, they have caviar,
they have lobster tongues
Lobsters have tongues?
Well, I'm sorry. Lobsters have all sorts
of parts when you're famous, okay?
- Oh, you're Mr. Famous now.
- Mmm.
- I'm sorry. My fault. [chuckling]
- Mmm-hmm.
[laughing] Vamos.
Santi didn't even, like,
bother defending me.
Yeah, I know.
I can't believe that.
I can. [sniffles]
I always knew this day would come.
It was inevitable,
like when you broke up with me.
Wait. Like, in the seventh grade?
Yeah. When the fuck else
did you break up with me?
Uh, wow.
Okay. I mean,
I haven't thought about that in years.
Why Wait. Whoa, are you
Like, do you still
No. No.
It's just the situation with Santi
reminds me a lot of that.
Like you were my best friend
and when you started tearing your way
through the women's volleyball team, I
I just felt very alone.
Felix, bro, breaking up with you
in the seventh grade
is one of the best decisions
I've ever made in my life.
Because now you get to be somebody
that's in my life forever,
not just some guy that I
I dry-humped in middle school.
Felix, you're an irreplaceable person and
And I love you.
And you're a genius.
And any artist
would be lucky to work with you.
[sniffles] I'm gonna be jobless forever.
No, you're not.
Why don't I rep you?
[laughs]
I don't know. Seems like a stupid idea,
but [sniffles]it could be cool.
- Yeah.
- Could be interesting.
We'll have to work out
the contract. [sniffles]
You get three to four percent.
Okay, this is gonna be good. [laughs]
Hey, who was a better dry hump?
Me or Lizzie Esposito?
You were, buddy.
["Tánger y Zahara" playing]
So, this, um, whole Isa relationship is
Off the record?
- Yeah.
- Totally fake.
- Hmm, yeah, I thought so.
- What?
- You don't think I could pick up Isa?
- No, I don't, actually.
But I do think you can figure out
what type of children she harvests
to make her skin look so good.
Whoa, whoa, that's my future wife
you're talking about.
Ugh, okay, I love this song.
Oh, okay, what's this? Oh.
You got some moves.
[laughs]
Santi. [laughs]
Okay, please don't say your own name.
[laughs]
Okay.
- [laughs]
- [Santi] Mmm.
Um
- I'm sorry. I thought that we wanted
- We did, but we can't.
What is this about? Isa?
No, it's not about fucking Isa.
I'm a journalist, Santi.
This could ruin my credibility.
My entire career.
I just turned in a piece
about you and your girlfriend.
Yo, we gotta go.
I just saw two of the Jonas wives,
so this party is dead.
I should get going.
Wait, but we haven't met Daddy Yankee yet.
Santi, please, desperation is not
a good look. Want it less.
Isa, I really appreciate you
bringing me here,
but my biggest hero
since I was a kid is right there.
See, this is the problem right here.
You still see yourself
as a little Colombian boy
- who idolizes Daddy Yankee.
- Puerto Rican.
Don't interrupt me.
You wanna meet your hero,
but you have the chance to be the hero.
What good is a selfie with Daddy Yankee
gonna do for your career?
You know what'll help your career?
Is if you go back to the studio with me
and really nail that pop-pop-pop.
- I thought it was two pops.
- There's a third fucking pop, bro.
- Like, this is what I'm talking about.
- Yeah.
We really have to focus and get this right
because this song of ours
is your chance to be the person
people dream about meeting.
Like, you can't pass that up.
You're right.
So let's get pop-pop-popping.
Let's get pop-pop-popping, bro.
[Santi laughs]
Hey.
Ew, why are you guys so sweaty?
We were at the beach.
I was teaching Felix how to swim.
- You should do something about that.
- Shit. I missed that?
Like you care. You're such a bad actor.
I understand that we were fighting,
but you could have at least texted me
and I would have shown up.
Like, Felix learning how to swim,
it's a big deal, Ness.
[Ness] Mmm-hmm.
All right, bro. Truce.
Are you fucking kidding?
Okay, the doc, out of my hands.
But you can't be angry at me.
Be angry at her.
She's not my friend. You are.
- Were.
- Were?
Were? What the fuck are you Are you
saying that we're not friends anymore?
Okay, whoa. We can figure this out. Right?
I mean, I'm gonna need you two
to kiss and make up eventually,
because I can't have
my two clients fighting.
What?
When we were at the beach,
we had a good talk.
It was lovely.
And we decided that it would be great
for all of us if I rep him.
And, like, help grow his career too.
Wait, okay, so now you have time
to manage both of us, fuck Gina and swim?
It's not always about you, Santi.
Sometimes, you know, you have to
Ness, it kind of is. Right?
The whole reason we moved to Miami
was for my career
and it only took you a few months
to fucking bail on me?
It was for all of our careers.
This was our dream.
And you're the one throwing it away
to be fucking Isa's boy toy.
You're kind of being a dick, bro.
- I'm the dick?
- Yeah.
Since I hooked up with Isa, look at
the fucking opportunities that we got!
We're at Daddy Yankee's party!
Thank you so much, Santi,
for bringing us to a party
where you couldn't even
be fucking seen with us,
holding us captive at Isa's studio
and, uh, oh, yeah, giving our song
to your fake lover. Like, wow.
[scoffs] Wow, you're still jealous.
Get over it, Ness.
[laughs] Why would I
be jealous about the song?
The song fucking sucks and I warned you.
You're selling out
and screwing all of us over.
Okay, so how is this selling out?
Because all I know is that this is
all the shit we've been dreaming about
- since we were in Fort Myers
- Uh
since we were kids.
- You know what selling out is, though?
- Mmm?
Doing a fucking grocery store ad.
Look around. I mean,
what manager would say no to this?
Maybe somebody
who shouldn't be fucking managing you.
I also would like to quit.
[reggaeton song playing]
[sighs]
Oh, hey.
Oh, hi. [chuckles]
Hi.
I heard the song you sent me.
[in Spanish] It's really good.
- [laughs]
- [in English] I want to meet your friend.
Wow, thank you. That's amazing. Um
Actually, uh, you know what? [sighs]
Never mind.
["Problema" playing]
So, what's up, D?