Peacemaker (2022) s01e07 Episode Script

1 My heart's like an open book for the whole world to read Sometime nothing keeps me together at the seams I'm on my way, I'm on my way Home sweet home It's a bitch song, but it still rocks.
- So cool.
- Do this.
- Is that white power? - Fuck white power.
It's the devil.
It means rock and roll forever, and tongue kiss hot babes, and smoke pot all day! - Yeah! - Yeah! Home sweet home Your old man's ready for you two maggots.
All right, motherfuckers.
Let's go.
Bets right here.
Let's go.
Let your money talk.
Come on.
What you got? All right Keep going.
Keep going.
Keep going, Keith No kicking, no biting, no grabbing, no Ah, fuck that! No holds barred! Hit it.
Come on.
Let's go.
What do you want? Don't be a faggot.
Get in there and hit him! Go, one more shot! Come on, Chris! You hit like a girl! the Glan Tai Bottling Plant Massacre.
Any leads on where the Peacemaker might be? Come on, Chris, don't be a pussy! Yeah.
- Whoa! Wait a second.
Hey! - What's goin' on? Somethin' ain't right.
He's doing the worm.
Yeah, there's some kind of seizure.
Keith? Keith.
Keith! Keith! Keith! We have a few leads.
We have every cop in the country out looking for him.
Keith! Keith! Keith! You dumb fuck.
You killed your brother! You killed your brother, you piece of shit! You dumbfuck! You killed your brother! You killed him, you dumbfuck! You okay in there? Do ya really wanna do ya really wanna taste it? - Get it on - Get on top - Make a move extreme - Make a pose Take a shortcut to your dreams I float straight to the stars on that flying thing - Getting high - Getting brave Getting snow blind - Game - Set, go Pick a tune, chick harpoon in a world beyond Got a beat, got a heat on a phony string - Tear your world apart - Once the magic starts Do ya really wanna do ya really wanna taste it? What's going up must come down Do ya really wanna do ya really wanna taste it? Baby, you're losing ground Blind to what you'll soon become The mirror lies the whole world's wrong But you Dancing with your blinkers on Throw your dog the invisible bone Do ya really wanna do ya really wanna taste it? What's going up must come down Do ya really wanna do ya really wanna taste it? Baby, you're losing ground Blind to what you'll soon become The mirror lies The whole world's wrong but you Dancing with your blinkers on Throw your dog the invisible bone Dude? Dude? Dude? Hey, you okay in there? Fuck.
We gotta get the fuck out of here.
That guy on TV, he's supposed to be the guy watching our backs.
Every police station in the country has one mandate this morning.
Find and stop the Peacemaker by whatever means necessary.
- You think he's a bird? - A bird? - Like Goff.
- Butterfly.
Dude, a butterfly is a type of bird.
A butterfly's not a bird, it's a fucking bug! - Fucking Adebayo! She fucked me.
- What? She probably planted that diary in my trailer.
I knew I couldn't trust these people.
Where the fuck's Judomaster? Judomaster was supposed to be there? Fuck it.
Can't worry about it now.
- Move.
- All right.
I've got all the Peacemaker helmets programmed in.
These ones at the police station, they must've been confiscated yesterday.
But these ones that's gotta be Christopher.
That's him.
- The diary is fake? - Of course it's a fake.
If I was gonna write a diary, it wouldn't be a diary, it'd be a fucking journal.
Well, I would read anything you wrote, dude.
I bet you could do some bomb poetry.
Dude, I thought you said you didn't write a diary.
I didn't! Did you see that thing? It looked like it fell out of my fucking vagina.
Do I look like the type of guy to stay up all night collaging Jupiters and aliens and shit to put on the front of my fucking diary? On first impressions, I'd have said, "No".
But after getting to know you a little bit, I gotta admit, it's definitely something I can see you doing.
You know what? Fine.
Fuck it.
If I enjoyed it, I wouldn't let people's judgments hold me back.
I'd collage all sorts of shit.
- Yeah, that's cool of you.
- Yeah.
It is fucking cool of me.
I'd make a collage of the three of us fucking some chicks with a bunch of dolphins around us doing beer bongs in a Corvette.
I don't want a dolphin watching me fuck.
- Where are you going? - Vigilante and me might as well get this done before they find us.
What done? - Kill this fucking cow.
- We are? Cool! You coming? No.
Eagly.
Fuck! Goddammit! Among the many items found in the search of Christopher Smith's home was a diary written by the suspect.
The diary links Smith not only to the murder You did it, didn't you? Waller sent you here for this express purpose.
- Did what? - Planted a diary in Peacemaker's trailer.
Yes.
That's why Peacemaker was chosen in the first place.
You're gonna lone-shooter the poor bastard? He has a history of instability and conspiratorial beliefs.
Couple that with violent outbursts, - he was the perfect pawn.
- He was your fucking friend.
- Maybe you should back off.
- Oh yeah? Yeah.
Because you've been fucking with me - from the first day I got here! - Well, maybe I could sense - your interior asshole.
- My what? Like, inside of all this nice person stuff, you're really just a fucking asshole! I thought you were bringing up some weird medical condition.
Why would I bring up a medical condition? I don't know! Maybe because you seem like the kind of bitch who would pick on someone's health issues in the middle of an argument.
Well, I'm not the one who just betrayed one of our own! Oh, okay! So it's okay to shoot an innocent man begging for his life, but this you have an issue with? He is a fellow soldier! Pretty random rule, that the only lives that matter are the lives of the ones who fight beside us? - Yes! - Well that is an incredibly clever way of shutting yourself off from the rest of the world's problems, but for me, it doesn't work.
I'm not made for this shit.
I don't wanna be here no more.
So I'm leaving.
Well, then why the fuck did you even come? Because I lost my job, and my mother offered me this one! Your mother? Yes.
But I didn't know that I was gonna get caught up in Mars Attacks.
Holy fuck! Your mother is Amanda Waller? Hey.
We need to get out of here.
She is Waller's daughter.
Yeah, I know.
You think I wouldn't do a background check on anyone coming to work with us? I don't know how your weird butterfly brain works.
- She also planted - Planted the diary.
I figured.
She probably shouldn't have done that.
And if she did, she should've waited until after we'd completed the mission.
But that guy on TV, he's our man on the inside, which means he's compromised.
And since our weird butterfly brains inherit human memories, he'll know we're here.
So drop whatever differences you two are having, pack up what you need, and meet me in the lot.
- I fucking trusted you! - Fuck.
What are you talking about? I feel like Man, every time we drink, you talk about TV shows.
- I'm sick of it.
- Bro How have you not seen Boondock Saints? It's a classic.
Vigilante Jesus! Man! Dude scared the shit out of me.
- It's a fucking leprechaun, man.
- A little dude.
- Oh my God.
He's hilarious-looking.
- Oh, he's getting mad! They're always after me Lucky Charms! I love it! If you have a message for Chris or Eagly, please leave it at the tone.
Chris, I just wanna make sure you're okay.
Let's try to figure this thing out.
Call me.
Fuck! - Come on, come on, come on - Come on - Love is all over me - Love is all over me - Over me - Over me, yeah You are the only one living in my fantasy Aren't you guys being a little nonchalant about all this? Economos, are you insinuating there is a wrong time and a right time to rock? Face the truth and I'll be all alone They're on 395 North, about to pass the exit to Contorinis Road.
I've got eyes.
Come on, come on come on Got it.
Love is all over me over me You are the only one living in my fantasy In my dreams come on, come on, come on What the fuck was that? - Dad? - Oh, fuck.
What are you doing? What I should've done long ago.
That's it, man.
We gotta go.
Come on, get up.
Go, go, go! There's no wrong time to rock! Vij! - No! - No, no, no.
Peacemaker, we gotta go.
Get the fuck away from me! Well Your son went into the woods.
Lead the way.
How the fuck did he find you? What? Fuck! He's fast.
You left your keys in the car? What? I was rushing.
Ignore it.
Let's go.
I'm not kidding.
There was at least 20 girls to one guy.
You're an asshole, man.
You're an asshole.
So, what do you wanna do tonight? You wanna go to the club or Mother Kiai! Open up! Police! Hey! I know you're pissed, but Get down, get down, get down, get down.
He's right down there.
He's running like a spaz.
Let's go.
Hit, my ass.
Breathing down my neck.
Fucking raccoons are hardcore, man.
Wasn't exactly inconsistent with what I imagined would happen if a man just walked up and grabbed a wild raccoon.
Let's go.
Don't close your eyes Don't sing your last lullaby There's no one there to hold Open up! Police! Police! Open up! Leota, Harcourt, go now.
Do you hear me? You can do it.
Police! I'm proud to have had you on my team.
Finish the job! Kill the fucking cow! How do you know about the cow? Nothing you can do will make me Now we really need to hurry.
We need to get the teleportation equipment to the ranch.
Hey.
Ik Nobe Llok? You could've just joined us.
You murdered him.
The alternative was what? He was a warrior.
Without him, his outfit will have no chance of stopping us.
Two clowns in costumes and a couple of rejects.
We need to go.
Fu No.
How the fuck are we gonna do this without him? Kiai! Ding-dong, bitches! Oh, you gotta be fucking kidding me right now.
That's your last sucker punch, asshole.
- Rope a dope, dumbshit.
- What? You down now, motherfucker? I think you got him.
He's right there.
Fuck me.
Fan out! Find him.
Wait.
I got something.
The door! - Come on! - Hey, dude, what are you doing? Right, the dash! Scoot.
Ow, ow! Hey, hey! Ow! My asshole! What the fuck, dude? What the fuck's wrong with your bird? Bad Eagly, stop it.
What are you doing, man? There's no wrong time to rock, motherfucker.
Now is.
This is the wrong time to rock.
You're gettin' me hot Cherie And I want what you got all over me Isn't my love strong enough? I'm ready to rock you Stop! How did they find you guys anyway? He put a GPS tracking device in Peacemaker's helmet.
I want what you got all over me I'm going crazy What? - Damn it.
- I didn't know! - I thought they were expensive.
- Fuck! Oh, I gotta pee so fucking bad.
No, Eagly, get back in the car.
John, can you get him in the car? Sure.
I fucking babysit birds.
Eagly, please get in the car.
He's not listening.
Get back in the car and crinkle a bag or something.
He'll think you have chips.
You gotta be fucking kidding me.
Who the fuck feeds their bird chips? You want some chips, huh? Yum, yum! Fuck no.
- What are you doing? - Shh! They're here.
Why the fuck are your pants all the way down? Well, I can't pee when clothes are touching my butt.
Eagly! - I'll kill you, motherfucker! - You think so? Forty years ago, God challenged me as he did Abraham.
But I was too weak to listen.
But not no more! - Kill that piece of shit, Dragon! - Yeah! I knew you was unclean when you were born! And even more so when you killed your brother.
That was you! Do it, White Dragon! Do it! I knew when you listened to that devil music.
I knew when you shaved your body like a woman.
I knew when you slept with the whores of polluted blood! And men! And even more so when you conspired with the forces of Baphomet against the United States of America! And now, boy, I give your life to Go There are gaps in the armor, man.
You killed my brother! You killed Keith! And you're only right about one thing, I am a piece of shit! I'm a piece of shit for listening to you for all those years! I'm a piece of shit for not killing you in your sleep! You hit like a girl.
Well, go ahead and do it, you fucking pussy.
I knew you couldn't do it, you faggot.
'Cause I control you.
Whether or not I kill you, you'll never be able to get the fuck away from m Dude, this is a really weird time to do your face exercises.
I mean, I guess you don't get a totally sick, jacked face like yours without dedication, but He's crying, asshole.
Oh.
Tender, nice touching.
- Hey, dude, that's creepy.
- Okay.
No, no, nothing serious.
Just some forms and stuff I have to fill out before I leave.
Yeah.
I love you too.
Let me.
What was your job before this? I ran a dog shelter.
- Oh, Jesus.
- Yeah.
We lost funding.
I think my mother saw an opportunity in my moment of weakness.
She always wanted me to do this shit, so she asked me, again, to come work for her.
Said she needed someone on the inside of a group of people she didn't trust.
- She doesn't trust anyone.
- Hell, I know.
Did you tell her about Murn? I couldn't decide if I was going to.
I guess it doesn't matter now.
I could tell you were hiding something.
I could tell you could tell.
Shit made me agitated.
Anyways like I said, I'm not made for this shit.
I'm not supposed to be here.
That's why I was packing up.
I just wanna do whatever job I need to where telling right from wrong ain't advanced calculus.
Well, that would be a shame.
Shame, why? Because you're good at the job.
And because we need every hand on deck to try to go kill this cow.
How? It's impossible.
We couldn't even get there in time.
Hey, John.
- Thank God you guys are here.
- What's going on? Dr.
Hurwitz kindly stitched up Eagly, and Vigilante's being a total freak.
Dude, they saw us.
Peacemaker and I are wanted.
What other choice do we have besides killing this veterinarian, this nurse, and this male nurse? You can just say two nurses, man.
If I just say "nurse", I think people will imagine it as a woman.
He's standing right there.
We don't have to imagine anything.
It must be weird waking up every day - and being a male nurse.
- You're a fucking busboy.
Oh, great! Now we definitely have to kill them, because you're giving away stuff about my secret identity.
Do we really have to kill these people? No.
We'll tie them up, and by the time the morning staff comes in, - we'll be long gone.
- They've seen our faces.
If we can't stop the butterflies today, it won't matter.
Okay.
But we can't use duct tape.
That'll hurt their skin - when they try to pull it off.
- Where are you going? Just to call my wife, tell her I'm on my way back.
So, you're compassionate about tape but not brutally murdering people? Yes.
God, please bring back my best pal, Eagly.
And I never should've left him in my father's garage for four years when I went to prison.
I should've found somebody better to take care of him.
Like an ugly girl who was desperate for love, who would've done anything I wanted when I was locked up.
And, you know, I could've just broke up with her the moment I got out.
I probably wouldn't even had to have sex with her, right? Yeah, you know probably just once, you know, to be nice.
And probably 'cause I was getting out of prison, I'd want to anyway, it wouldn't have even been a chore.
But I was selfish.
And I was a bad friend to Eagly.
The only one besides Keith that ever loved me for real.
Oh, fuck.
Please, God I'll do anything you want.
Just please, please keep Eagly alive.
Buddy? You know, he was so happy to see me today, he wrapped his wings around me to hug me.
- An eagle hugged you? - Oh yeah.
Yeah, I call bullshit on that.
You don't want to believe in miracles, that's on you.
Lee, where are you? You said you were gonna be here two hours ago.
Uh, babe, I just saw an eagle hug a human.
With everything going on, what? - Yeah.
- Fuck.
Maybe maybe it's a sign.
A sign of what? Hey, we should get a move on killing this cow.
What about your wife? Well, she's upset.
But she gets it sort of.
Cool.
Okay, how do we do this without Murn? Well, we have someone else that we can trust to lead us.
- Me? - No.
Fuck, no.
The butterflies breathe our air and drink our water, but our food sources don't keep them alive.
So they had to transport a creature from their planet across the galaxy.
And now we know they keep it in the cavern below the barn on Coverdale ranch.
Hey girl, you'll land it You've got supplies if they demand it There, they milk the beast for the amber fluid.
To stop the butterflies, all we have to do is kill the cow.
Without it, they won't be able to stay alive for more than a couple of weeks.
However, they almost certainly know that we're on our way to do that now.
Which means they'll do what they can to move the cow out before we get there.
How? According to what Ads and I overheard, teleportation.
Yeah, they get by I'm guessing they can move it to one of their other enclaves around the country, which means, to us, they will be lost forever, and all of our work goes to waste.
Hopefully, we can make it there before they make their move.
And then we go in there, and we kick ass like Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid.
They get slaughtered at the end of that film.
Bro, there's a freeze-frame and we hear a bunch of bullets.
- That doesn't mean they died.
- Yes, it does.
I don't think so.
I think they jumped over those bullets right after that freeze-frame.
Well, that's an exceedingly optimistic interpretation.
Both things are equally possible.
No, they're not.
Well, whichever one you believe says a lot about your character.
Yeah, about how insane you are.
Economos, I love this back-and-forth thing we have going.
It's not as deep as, like, what Peacemaker and I have, but it's fucking cool.
Whatever the case I'm in.
Hashtag MeToo.
I guess.
Yeah.
- Fuck, yeah.
- Let's do this shit.
No.
- I think you need to calm down.
- You can't come with us.
You sure you don't need the help? - No, you'd just die.
- But we are gonna have to sequester your vehicle out there.
Yeah, they get by Oh Surprisingly nice people, considering.
Except for the guy in the blue.
Yeah, that dude's a fucking mess.
They need, they yearn they lust with cheeks unturned Here you go, buddy.
Hands will shake and heads will nod They'll get by by the grace of God Chris I just wanted to say I know what I did.
And I'm sorry.
- I shouldn't have - Forget it.
I don't give a fuck.
You said we were a team.
That's obviously not the case.
I just can't wait till this is all over, so I never have to see your stupid, dumb face ever again.
Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! There's no wrong time to rock.
Hey! Hey! Hey! Cleanliness is next to godliness.
And God knows I'm close to Him.
Blood.
That's what you wanna see.
If you're not seeing any blood, you're not scrubbing hard enough.
Clean your toes.
Start at the bottom.
Work your way up.
Linger in the middle.
Keep going a little higher.
Swing the hips.
When you're drying, especially, it's important to swing the hips.
And we're finished now.
Thank you very much.
Thank you for attending.