Randall Hopkirk (Deceased) (1969) s01e07 Episode Script

- Hello, Father.
- You're looking well, Susan.
Really, how would you know? How's your aunt? Fine.
Not so good when she heard you were coming.
Probably indigestion.
Your car outside? Give me the keys.
I'll drive.
'passengers on flight EC713 'to passport control, please.
' It's been a long time, Sue.
Too long.
Fifteen years too long as far as I'm concerned.
When you're boss in an organisation like mine, every day belongs to other people.
Then what brought you to England? Have they all gone on holiday or something? OK, Sue.
We'll play it your way.
Look out! There's someone in the road.
I see him.
No! But he's gone.
That's right.
You'd have just run him down.
- There wasn't time to stop.
- I didn't say there was.
It's just as well I was driving, isn't it? - You have to find him.
- No chance of that.
But he'll find me.
He usually does.
Good morning, Jeannie.
How are you? That's a very nice outfit.
Very attractive.
How much did it cost? This wall could do with a coat of paint.
Fine, Mr.
Kirstner.
The Royal Chester Club in the smoking room.
I'll be there.
Goodbye.
Kirstner.
Where have I heard that name before? Jeannie, I mean Jeff, you've got to help me.
- What's the matter? - Well we've known each other a long time, haven't we? - Long enough to speak man to man.
- Or man to ghost.
What's wrong? - I want a straight answer.
- Go ahead.
You'll never believe this I can't talk about it.
There's no sense hiding things.
- I've got a right to know.
- Of course.
You'll be the first I'll tell when I know what you're on about.
- Morning, Jeff.
- Hello, Jeannie.
It's Jeannie I'm on about.
I thought you were a friend.
- What about Jeannie? - She's got a boyfriend! And you never said a word! - Did you got out last night? - Hmm? No.
Why? Just a thought.
I heard you'd found a new boyfriend.
Oh, really? Who told you that? I don't know.
I don't remember.
She's got one all right.
She's just being devious.
A right weird-looking fellow he is.
- Jeannie? - Hmm? - I've got an appointment.
- OK.
- I'll be back after lunch.
- Right.
Don't go.
Listen! - Bye.
- Bye.
I'm surprised at you.
Really surprised.
I've been faithful to you.
Never looked at anybody else.
I gave you everything.
I even took your mother to Mallorca.
What do I get - nothing? That lipstick doesn't suit you.
- Can I help, sir? - Yes.
- Mr.
Randall? - Yes.
- Shall we sit down? - Surely.
- What are these for? - A retainer.
We've got to talk about Jeannie.
- Not now.
- It's serious.
Will you listen? - Marty.
- What? Vanish! You said on the phone your name was Kirstner.
Paul Kirstner.
I arrived from New York yesterday.
- Paul Kirstner.
- I'm in property.
Oh, yeah, THAT Paul Kirstner.
I thought I'd heard the name before.
You're behind every racket in the States.
I'm sorry.
You've just wasted my time and yours.
I don't think so.
You've got a clean license and working for me isn't going to change that.
- Doing what? - Looking after my daughter.
Just while I'm here.
You've got plenty of men to do that kind of work.
Maybe.
You want the job or not? - Why me? - The people I might use over here are the very kind I want kept away from Susan.
- You name a fee and I'll double it.
- What's the other reason? Have you any idea what it's like to be haunted, Randall? Huh? Have I ever? I don't just mean by the past, I mean by prejudice hate people who've sworn to see you dead and you don't know who or why.
You break my heart.
Next it'll be "I'm just a victim of circumstance".
It's not your fault you made millions from every crooked angle in Chicago.
OK.
OK.
You have it your way.
But you're good.
And you're clean.
Now, do you keep the smoke away from my girl or not? Why do you think there'll be trouble? There's always trouble.
Only in New York I can handle it.
Randall, I've told you the score, now I'll let you decide.
Jeff, you've got to help me.
I can't help feeling there's more involved in this than you're prepared to tell me.
Are you all right, gentlemen? Are you all right? - Fine.
- Yeah.
We're OK.
- Did you do that? - No.
I must talk to you about Jeannie! The bracket's broken.
That might have been a nasty accident.
Yeah.
Look, don't you worry about it.
- If it WAS an accident.
- Why not? - Brackets do break.
- Yeah.
Especially around me.
That's the third one this year.
Jeff, this is one case we can't afford to take.
It may help you to decide if you'd come and meet my daughter.
Why not? Hey, dreamer.
This way.
Ah, this is my daughter, Susan.
Susan, Mr.
Randall.
- How do you do? - Nice place.
We like it.
I suppose you'd like a glass of whisky.
We haven't any bourbon.
It's a bit early in the day for me, but you go ahead, Miss Kirstner.
My aunt's in the garden.
I'll tell her the detective is here.
Don't spoil her day.
Besides, I'd rather talk to you alone.
OK, I've got some calls to make anyway.
I'll see you later.
Your father seems to think somebody's trying to kill him.
Are you for or against that? I had hoped you'd be staying for tea, Mr.
Randall.
I haven't seen my father since I was eight.
We used to spend summers together.
- Must have been cosy.
- Was it? On my last visit he spent most of the time trying to get off a charge of extortion.
Did he? - Found him not guilty.
- But you pronounced sentence.
I bet you'd believe in fairies and be scared by ghosts.
If you're protecting my father, I can't ask you to leave.
He can take care of himself.
He's concerned about you.
Then you're wasting your time.
Jeff! Jeff, there's something crazy going on here.
- It's that kind of place.
- No, seriously.
There's a character here, who's Jeannie's boyfriend! Is it a full moon or have you been at the incense again? He was in her apartment this morning.
Now he's here! With Kirstner! Let's ask him.
He's in there now.
Come on.
Mr.
Randall, my aunt, Mrs.
Maddox.
- How do you do? - My pleasure.
Excuse me.
He should get on very well with your father.
Randall, you want something? I wondered if I could have a word with your friend.
- Friend.
- He was in here, Jeff.
- The man who was here.
- You've got the wrong room.
- There's no one else here.
- He's lying.
Have you been here all the time? I don't know what you're getting at.
Who is this friend? Just an idea.
Sorry to have bothered you.
Jeff, I saw him as clearly as you can see me.
Would you care for some tea, Mr.
Randall? Yes, please.
Thank you.
Did you see anyone else come out of the study? No.
Apart from Mr.
Kirstner, we're the only ones here.
I'll drink to that.
- I'm worried about you, Marty.
- He was in there.
And Jeannie? When did you see him with her? This morning.
I popped round to see her and this fella was there.
- Doing what? - She was just leaving and - This fella was He was - What? He was He was coming out the bedroom, Jeff! Eh? I never thought I'd see the day.
For two pins, Marty, I'd Don't you know Jeannie better than that? I saw him.
He had a white suit on and was laughing all over his face.
Jeannie! Jeannie! Jeannie, what happened? Jeff! - Thanks a bunch.
Now what's wrong? - Jeannie's in trouble.
I warned you.
I told you there was a man there.
Slow down.
What kind of trouble? - She's unconscious on the floor! - How? How should I know? She screamed, I dashed round.
When I got there she was lying there.
- You've got to go.
- Any signs of violence? No.
It must be this fool that's hanging about.
- You didn't see him? - No.
Come on, hurry up.
- Leave it.
There's no time for that.
- Hang on.
There's no time.
Leave it.
Randall.
Just a minute.
- It's for you.
- Oh.
- Who is it? - Jeannie, who else? What were you saying? 'I wondered if you were going to the office.
' No, I'm going to the Kirstner's.
Any reason? No, I just thought I'd take the morning off.
- Any messages? - Yes.
Ask why she's taken to sitting on the sleeping room floor! No, I don't mind, love.
- 'Nothing wrong, is there?' - I don't really know.
I think I've just been overdoing things a bit.
- What's the matter? - 'It's all right, Jeff.
' Perhaps you'll listen to me in the future.
Quiet! If anything's happened, it's no good keeping it to yourself.
I'm not sure.
It's happened once or twice lately.
- And then again this morning.
- 'What happened this morning?' I could have sworn there was a man in the apartment.
'A very odd man standing right behind me.
' I told you, but you wouldn't believe me.
I'm just a ghost.
Fine for blowing up balloons, but when it comes to real detection - it's razor-edge Randall.
- Shut up! See what you can find out.
- I'm coming over.
- No, Jeff.
Really.
Don't argue.
You can tell me about it on the way to the Kirstner place.
'I'll be seeing you.
' Relax.
He'll be here in five minutes.
And don't worry.
We'll find him.
Sure you will, Marty.
But then what are you gonna do? - You're psychic.
- You might say that.
Permanently.
- She can't see you.
- Not now.
But if I work at it, I can have her in hysterics in no time at all.
- You're a ghost.
- You call yourself a detective.
You're as stupid as Elliot Ness.
Put that vase back.
- It's a wedding present.
- Yeah.
Thank you.
Whatever your name is, leave my wife alone! If you're getting technical, - she's your widow.
- Never mind all - You're solid.
- And so are you.
- To me.
- Ow! You better sit down and listen.
How did you do that? With the cigar and the clothes.
Well, I've had 35 years to practise.
How about you? Um, 12 months.
After you've been at it a while, you might pick up a thing or two.
Of course, it requires a superior intellect.
- You don't look superior to me.
- Don't get smart.
Not if you don't want your widow to get hurt.
What do you mean? Jeannie hurt? You got a nice little operation going here.
Play your cards right, nothing's gonna change.
- What cards? - Kirstner.
Paul Kirstner.
I see.
You're haunting him.
Uh-uh.
Hunting him.
And now I've got some help.
- Your kinda help.
- How can I help? I can't keep up with you.
You got a partner, haven't you? A partner that can rub out Kirstner any time I give the word.
What? - You needn't have come.
- If someone's hanging about, I'm not leaving you alone - till we know what's happening.
- Jeff! I've got to talk to you.
We've got problems.
- You'd better pack a weekend case.
- Why? I'll feel happier if you stay with Susan Kirstner.
Then I can keep an eye on both of you.
- Jeff, I really don't think - Darling, don't argue.
Just go.
- Marty, what's it all about? - Can't you see him? - No, of course you can't.
- Come to the point.
I want you to drop the Kirstner case.
Tell him to get somebody else.
You better be careful what you say.
- It's a straightforward case.
- Jeff, just drop it.
I'm warning you.
Don't foul it up.
- Don't threaten me.
- Threaten? Stop playing games.
What you on about? Games? What you doing, Marty? Marty? Where've you got to? Come back here.
- Jeff.
What are you doing? - Looking for clues.
- Oh.
I'm ready.
- Oh, fine.
Marty.
Next time I'll really work you over.
But you can't.
I mean, I'm a ghost.
What do I look like? One of the untouchables? Next time I'll be ready for you.
Sure.
We're in the same league.
Only you can help me get Kirstner.
- Why should I? - I'm not playing around.
I can fix that dame of yours real good if I have to.
And maybe Randall.
You're bluffing.
If you could do that, you wouldn't need our help.
Kirstner's got more lives than a cat.
I've crashed his car four times.
Set fire to his office and his apartment.
1943 I nearly got him - with a hand grenade.
- In the army? You must be kidding! Kirstner? No, he was selling them on the blackmarket.
You ought to be arrested.
One time he spent a fortune trying to get me exorcised.
You don't shut Bugsy Spanio up that easy.
- He knows about you? - That's half the trouble.
He senses it when I'm around.
He won't even strike a match on his own.
You've been after him for 35 years? More than 35 years.
I've watched him cheat, steal, blackmail and murder.
He's beaten the rap so often they don't try now.
I knew he had a bad reputation, but murder.
I can give you a list as long as your tombstone.
And right at the top is the name Smiler Spanio.
Smiler? Smiler.
You've heard about the death wish? Something like that happened to me.
I swore I'd never rest till I put him where he put me.
All right, Smiler.
Come on, how did it happen? It was in Chicago, before the end of prohibition.
We had our eye on a nice bootlegging operation on the north side of town.
Only in those days, Kirstner's idea of a takeover bid had nothing to do with stocks and shares.
There's Kirstner.
There I am.
Watch it.
There you are, partner.
A million dollars' worth of booze.
- You did a good job, Bugsy.
- It was your plan.
You gotta take some credit.
Uh-uh.
Not some of the credit, all of it.
- I thought we were partners.
- Not when your gun is empty and mine is loaded.
I can't watch it.
- Why you dirty double-crosser.
- Ha ha, that's right, Bugsy.
I'm dissolving the partnership now.
I'll get even with you! I swear.
I'll get even! Bugsy! Bugsy? I've never been so close to getting him as I am now.
I know it was a rough way to go, but you can't expect Jeff to do anything.
Can't I? He's gonna do exactly what I tell him to do.
If he doesn't, I'm gonna really fix that dame of yours.
Marty, you've come up with some weird ones, but this one's out of sight.
Next you'll say you don't believe in ghosts.
OK, Bugsy exists.
You don't expect me to believe - he's going to knock me around.
- Perhaps not you.
What about Jeannie? You know what he did to her this morning.
- She probably dreamt it.
- Dreamt it! He comes into my flat, scares Jeannie, she's terrified.
He knocks me about in front of you, he makes me disappear.
What more do you want? Ectoplasm? So a ghost gangster's hanging about.
- I'm not chopping Kirstner.
- Not so loud.
All right.
But how do we stop him getting at Jeannie? You're the ghost.
You sort him out.
- Just like that? - I can't do anything.
If I tell Jeannie her late husband is being blackmailed by a ghost gangster, she'll go spare.
Thanks a lot.
You're a great help.
I don't stand a chance against Bugsy.
He's had 35 years to practise.
I can't even get a cigarette.
- What? - He smokes cigars.
We have to get Jeannie away somewhere.
You haven't seen him.
He's ruthless.
He's got shoulders as big as that! - And he's as tall as He's here.
- Bugsy? Where? He knows what he has to do? You can't expect him to kill somebody in cold blood.
Why not? Kirstner did.
- What's he saying? - He can't see the problem about murdering a murderer.
Say murder ain't what it used to be.
- Murder ain't what it used to be.
- Not here.
- Not here.
- All right! OK, then.
We'll just have to do it the hard way.
Now, watch it, Bugsy.
Don't start anything.
He's gone, Jeff.
He's gone! - He's gone after Jeannie.
- What? Don't just stand there.
- Bugsy, I'm warning you.
- Yeah.
Sure.
Sure.
What are you up to? You better stop this.
If you don't, I'll Where's he gone? Bugsy? Who's that? It's me, Marty.
Bugsy! I'm sorry, Jeff.
Jeannie! It's all right, love.
Take it easy.
Jeannie.
- The face, Jeff.
Where is it? - Just relax.
Relax.
Take it easy, love.
You did a great job.
- Where is he? - He's gone.
He's dangerous.
You should have seen the lightning.
You've no idea what he can do.
- Play for time.
- How.
Tell him you think you can persuade me.
- Find out all you can about him.
- Right.
He's probably listening to us now.
Jeannie, you've been overdoing things.
I've never seen you so jumpy.
Jumpy? I saw him as clearly as I see you.
In the dark? It was a face in the mirror.
A horrible face.
That old portrait reflected? I don't know.
- But the lights! - Look, eyes play tricks especially in the dark.
This morning? Forget it.
There's no one in this room but you.
So why don't you get ready for dinner? All right.
I'm sorry, Jeff.
It's not like me.
No, it isn't.
See you soon.
- Oh, Randall.
- Yeah.
- Will you come in for a minute? - Sure.
- Sit down.
- Thanks.
- Whisky all right? - It'll do.
I'm going into town tomorrow on business.
Have fun.
Tell me, how much do you know about my set-up in the States? I know you were a wheel in the old syndicate.
Now it's a corporation with marble pillars and a pension scheme.
- Times have changed.
- The rackets haven't.
Times have changed.
Trouble is, some people haven't.
They might try to even up - when they know I'm here.
- I wouldn't be surprised.
I can take care of myself.
If they get their hands on Susan Depends if they know you're here.
Not now.
But if word gets out I'm going to London, a man called Lacey - might put two and two together.
- Well, don't go to London.
I said I've got business.
You'd save us a lot of trouble if you took a plane back to the States.
Tell me, Randall, do you carry one of these? - Tell him now! - Yes now? - Now! - Jeff No, I've never felt the urge.
He gave it back to him.
He had him cold! One squeeze.
One lousy squeeze on the trigger! Randall, let's see about dinner.
Jeff's the cautious type, aren't you? I mean, how do you know Kirstner didn't give him an empty gun? Maybe he needs more persuasion.
No, Jeff's all right.
When he gets the right - He'll do it.
- He'd better.
Bugsy? Bugsy? This must be a pleasant change for you, Mr.
Kirstner.
Back after - how long is it? - Mrs.
Hopkirk? - No, thank you.
- Mr.
Randall? - Please, thank you.
Basking in the warmth and affection of your family.
Nice.
Don't be smart, Randall.
And you, Paul? Black.
I was just making conversation.
I'm sorry our hospitality can't be a little more cheerful, Mrs.
Hopkirk.
Oh, that's all right.
It's very kind of you to have me here.
Perhaps you'll come again some time.
When things get back to normal.
When are you leaving, Father? It would be nice to know.
It isn't every girl who can take a bath with a detective outside the door.
May I? I'm going to town tomorrow, then I'll take the next flight to New York.
Feel free any time you want a bath, you'll be quite safe.
If you knew Susan's father as we do, Mr.
Randall, perhaps you'd understand better.
Excuse me.
Having fun? Hilarious.
- I thought it was rather pathetic.
- I suppose it was.
Whichever side of the tracks you come from.
Jeff, I've got to talk to you! - Is he really as bad as they say? - Worse, probably.
Then why are you taking the case? - Extenuating circumstances.
- Jeff.
Jeannie, we don't want any more hallucinations.
- Why don't you have an early night? - What a good idea.
It's been a fascinating evening.
A laugh a minute.
- Good night, Jeannie.
- Good night, Jeff.
Bugsy's up to something.
He's been gone for over an hour.
- Perhaps he's had an accident.
- Or he's planning one.
How could he? Kirstner will be gone tomorrow.
You haven't met Bugsy.
- He's capable of anything.
- Such as? - That wasn't - No, Jeff, it wasn't.
He did say he set fire to Kirstner's apartment.
That's right.
And there's not a fire extinguisher in the whole dump.
Jeff.
He's arrived.
He's sitting next to you.
Now, look, you've got to be reasonable about this, Bugsy.
Tell him there's been a change in plans.
I don't need a trigger-man no more.
It's all off.
And he's over here now.
All I want him to do is use that phone.
Then we'll be square.
- Use the phone? - That's right.
One phone call.
Now.
And I won't go near the dame no more.
What's he saying? He wants you to use the phone, just once, - and he'll leave Jeannie alone.
- So what are we waiting for? - I'm not so sure.
- Marty, shut up.
- What's the number? - London, 01-246-8090.
It's London, The message? He's speaking for Paul Kirstner.
You're speaking for Paul Kirstner.
Hello, I'm speaking on behalf of Paul Kirstner.
- If there are any messages - If there's any messages - If there are any messages - he's with his daughter.
- We can't do this.
- That's enough.
- Come on, Marty.
- he's with his daughter.
If there are any messages, he's with his daughter.
Wait a minute.
- Watch it.
He's sitting there.
- Why not? The one guy with a better reason for killing Kirstner.
Jack Lacey.
- Lacey? - Lacey? I bet he's buying a wreath right now.
- Seen anything? - No.
No sign of Bugsy either.
- He's probably gone with Kirstner.
- It is possible Lacey won't come.
He could've been struck by lightning Keep your eyes open.
I'm going to the house.
Boo! Marty! Night night, Marty.
We'll leave the car here.
Tea, Mr.
Randall? Jeff, please sit down.
You're making me nervous.
I'm sorry.
My father has got you brainwashed.
The sooner this case is finished, the better.
It has turned cold.
Is there a window open, Susan? I'll close it.
What's the matter? You're behaving like someone expecting an invasion.
I'm just edgy, it probably means nothing.
I think it does, Jeff.
Steady.
Just step into the room nice and slowly.
Sit down.
All I want is Paul Kirstner.
Mr.
Kirstner's in London.
He won't be back until this evening.
- Aunty! - Good.
We'll wait.
Tea, anyone? - Have you hidden the car? - Down the road.
OK.
Anyone moves, use it.
I'm sorry, Jeff.
There was nothing I could do.
He came up behind me.
You know your trouble.
You're out of condition.
You're getting soft.
Why don't you try a few press-ups? Reading out loud? No.
Just contacting headquarters on my wrist-radio.
If you've got ideas about warning Kirstner, I wouldn't advise it.
Not with ladies present.
Why should I warn Kirstner? Who d'you think phoned you last night? I hear you had a problem to settle.
- So have I.
- Why call me? Right kind of help.
OK.
But keep out of it.
I've waited too long to get a chance at Kirstner.
Must have a good reason.
I've waited five years for him to come over.
I knew he would sooner or later.
You're a spectator.
That's all.
Randall's not fooling me, Marty.
They were just talking, Bugsy.
OK.
But you tell him I've got my eye on him every second.
- Well? - He's nervous.
He stopped smiling.
- We can't try anything if he's here.
- You can.
Come on! You don't know how good he is.
Just attract their attention for a while.
But how? They can't see him or me.
Exactly.
If you get Bugsy mad, they might see some things that'll surprise them.
Randall.
He's arrived, Jeff.
Not a sound.
Anyone.
- Where is he now? - Who? - Bugsy.
- Oh, He's still by the window.
All right.
He's all yours.
Yes Er - Listen, Bugsy.
- What? Er, Bugsy Er How does that grab you? You've been dead so long, you've forgotten how stupid you are.
Marty, I'll kill you! You're slipping.
Come on.
Where's the big smile, Smiler? Bugsy, how's your foot? That was childish.
That was pathetic! Watch this.
- What the?! - Don't look at me.
I haven't moved.
How does that grab you? Over here, Bugsy.
OK, buddy.
OK.
You've asked for it.
Where did you go? Come on! I'm gonna give you a fat lip.
Marty! Where are you, Marty? What's the matter? Nervous? Got a weak heart? - Come on.
- Don't move.
- Stay there.
- I wouldn't.
Come on, Bugsy.
Come on.
You can do better than that.
Come on, Bugsy.
I'm gonna do it again, Bugsy.
- Ow! - There.
- You shouldn't have done that.
- I'll do it again.
You have been had, Bugsy.
- Kirstner! - Thanks, Randall.
Jack Lacey.
I've heard a lot about you.
I'm sorry we couldn't warn you.
- Shall I call the police? - The police? No.
They wouldn't know what to do.
- But if you let them go - Susan, take your aunt upstairs, and Mrs.
Hopkirk.
Wait a minute.
I'm on your side, remember? Susan, please just go.
I've got to take care of this myself.
There are still a lot of witnesses.
Shut up.
You're not clever.
Clever? He'd have killed Susan as soon as he got me.
Lacey has had the mark on me for years.
He put word around that the only safe place for me was the Tower of London.
Well, tonight we'll find out.
You are as black as you're painted.
I've never buried my head in the sand.
Ever.
I'm not giving Lacey a chance of coming back for Susan.
You're a fool.
Bugsy's disappeared.
I think he's gone outside.
Stay out of it, Randall and get back.
You, too.
OK.
Outside.
It's dark outside, Kirstner, - and you don't like that.
- So? - Bugsy likes the dark.
- What do you know about that? Thought I'd mention it.
One more word from you and I'll see you meet Bugsy personally.
Now move! Hello.
Police.
OK.
Turn round.
Lacey, over there.
Move! Bugsy! Where are you? Pull that trigger, Kirstner, it's murder.
I'll swear it was self-defence whether you go for that gun or not.
OK.
Have it your own way.
Kirstner! Over here.
I had to do it.
I don't get it.
He had me cold.
Then he starts blazing away at those bushes.
- Nothing there.
- No.
Quiet as a grave.
Doesn't make sense.
Come on.
- So Bugsy got his man.
- Yeah, finally.
I can't say I'll be sorry to get back to the office.
- No more hallucinations? - You'll be the first to know.
- Could you open the window? - Why? - All this smoke.
- Smoke? What smoke? What smoke? The place is full of it.
I think you've been overdoing it a bit lately.
OK, Randall.
This is it.
This is Harry the Hatchet Hopkirk.
Keep your eyes on the road and tell that stupid broad to button her lip otherwise I'll fill you full of lead.
- Is that better? - Thanks, broad.
I mean Jeannie.