The Crew (2021) s01e07 Episode Script

All right, Jessie, nice job.
Bring it on home.
- What'd she finish?
- Thirty-second.
You're happy she had a lousy race.
Wha? Not at all.
She did nice things out there.
I mean, she beat two cars.
She didn't hit anyone in the pit crew.
For the last time, it was an accident.
No, no. Once is an accident.
Three times is attempted murder.
It was her first big race.
She was thrown out there.
I'm proud of her.
Yeah, no.
She's a decent driver. She really is.
I'm sure our sponsors are very happy
because sometimes when the cars
go by so fast, you can't read the logos.
Oh! That's weird.
Why are they interviewing her?
She practically finished last.
I'm gonna go check if she's okay.
Jacket on or jacket off?
- You're pittin' up pretty good. Jacket on.
- Jacket on.
I wanna thank our owner,
Catherine Spencer.
- She's such a suck-up.
- Man, well, who cares what she says?
And the most amazing crew chief
a driver could want, Kevin Gibson.
Actually, for a first race,
pretty impressive.
- Tell me you aren't falling for this.
- [shushes]
Let her speak.
So what's it like having
your first Cup race under your belt?
You know, obviously, I'm not happy
where I placed, but that's on me.
The car was set up perfectly.
A shout-out
to Chuck Stubbs and Amir Lajani.
She knows their last names?
What is happening?
There's one person I haven't mentioned.
I'm just keeping his seat warm
until he gets back.
Jake Martin, get well soon, buddy.
Yeah, the whole team misses you,
the whole sport misses you.
I don't wanna use the word "hero,"
but, um
[sobbing] I'm sorry.
Excuse me, I need to be with my team.
Hey, great first race, kid.
Wow, I had no idea I was your hero.
You're not.
I thought tears would be too much,
but then I just went for it.
[theme music playing]
Question. If you were dating someone
and had leftovers in the fridge
and they ate them, you'd be pissed, right?
There are a lot of variables.
What was the food? How long was it there?
Were you actively hiding it?
Walk me through everything.
Frank and I went to Basil Leaf,
my favorite restaurant.
- I ordered my favorite dish.
- Yeah, lobster ravioli.
Yeah, 'cause they put
big chunks of lobster in there.
I saved half for lunch today,
and Frank ate it.
Hold the phone. Frank went into
his own fridge and ate the food?
Beth, if he's capable of that,
he's capable of anything.
You gotta get out of this relationship.
I know you don't wanna hear this,
but the rule is,
unless specifically labeled,
leftovers in the fridge are a jump ball.
- It's common knowledge.
- Ugh. I should've gone to Amir.
Okay.
If you say that, you've already lost.
So, how was your weekend with…
[moaning, kissing]
…Morgan?
I don't like her for her money,
but yesterday
I did feel like Pretty Woman.
Except instead of a dress,
she bought me Nikes and a pretzel.
So, did you tell Catherine yet?
She was pretty mad.
I don't care. I don't.
It's none of her business.
Morgan's great.
Unlike you, she laughs at my stories.
I laughed at them the first time
and second time.
But after 100, I just don't have the will.
The only strike against her
is she's friends with Catherine.
Yeah, well, that is a pretty big strike.
It's like having a face tattoo.
It's hard to get past it.
She checks a lot of boxes.
- You have boxes?
- Yeah. I've always had boxes.
- Since when?
- Since always.
- What are they?
- Funny, hot
Okay. I've only had two boxes.
[rock music playing]
- Can I come in?
- Why ask?
You'll do what you want anyway.
I wanted to talk to you at the track,
but I guess… we kept missing each other.
I saw you hiding behind a dumpster.
- I lost my contacts.
- You don't wear contacts.
Not anymore, I lost them.
Pay attention to my story.
About you and Morgan
I understand I said I wouldn't date her.
And I did, and we're happy.
I'm not gonna apologize for that.
- Kevin
- No. Know what? I'm a grown man.
And so is Morgan.
Obviously, she's a woman,
but she's full grown.
Not fat. She's mature. Not old.
Please don't tell her any of this.
What I was gonna say is I talked
to her and she seems excited.
I don't get it,
but for some reason,
she finds you… charming.
You're saying that
like it's not even remotely possible.
It's possible,
I just have to get used to it.
Just like I got used
to my stepmom being younger than me.
- Think we're done here.
- One more thing. And this is important.
We need a new hauler.
If we can't get the car to the track,
we can't race.
Yeah, it's got like a million miles on it.
And, obviously, I can't prove this,
but it's definitely haunted.
I talked to Morgan, but I couldn't get her
to pull the trigger.
So since you two have been
getting along so well,
it'd help if you'd nudge her
over the goal line.
Oh, okay. Uh…
A week ago, you told me to start looking
for a new job.
Now you want me to leverage
my relationship to get what you want.
That is interesting.
[sighs]
Hold onto that table, Catherine,
'cause she be turnin'.
I realize this is awkward.
Whoa!
You feel that? Was that an earthquake?
No. It was a power shift.
Are you finished?
I have one more about a tsunami,
but I made my point.
If you don't wanna do it, don't.
No, I'll do it. You know why?
'Cause I'll do it for the team.
It'll happen tonight
at the Pit Stop over tater tots.
See? That right there.
Morgan's never had
a tater tot in her life.
What do you two have in common?
It doesn't make any sense.
- You think she's out of my league?
- League? She's in a different sport.
Did Beyoncé sing at your birthday party?
No, but Beth sang Beyoncé.
She was pretty drunk,
but she did a good job.
Up until she sang "All the Single Ladies,"
then she started to cry.
Kind of ruined the mood.
[rock music playing]
I like a lot of camber in the wheels.
If it's too tight,
we'll play with the shims and wedge.
Wow. All right, I can make that happen.
Yeah, you really know your stuff.
This makes our job a lot easier.
Ooh. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Make sure you can turn that back
to the stuff I like next week.
How do you like your car set up?
Like I like my women.
Pretty on the outside, with a lot of parts
I don't understand on the inside.
[chuckles]
Yeah. Jake just hits the gas
and tries to finish first.
I'm guessing that's also how he is
with his ladies.
- Oh!
- [laughs] Yeah, it is.
She's saying you know nothing
about cars or women.
Well, she doesn't know anything
about potato chips or coffee makers.
Are you just naming things you see?
I'm going to Kevin's office.
And not because I can see it.
Because I want to.
Oh, I hate her so much!
Me too.
Who we talking about?
- Jessie.
- Actually, I'm kinda warming up to her.
Today she told me I had a steely gaze.
I know what she's doing, but it's working.
Not you too.
She's working with Chuck and Amir.
They're drooling over her
because she knows the boring stupid stuff.
Jake, calm down.
Some of the best drivers are like you.
Born with an extra finger
they had removed as a child
and they wonder every day
if it would've given them an edge?
That wasn't what I meant, but that too.
They didn't have the technical knowledge.
So, learn about the cars,
beat Jessie at her own game.
Yeah, that would be cool.
I'd be like, "Hey, the car has a thing
that turns the other thing,
and I know about it. What's up?"
See, just hearing that
gives me goosebumps.
Was that extra finger a pinky or a thumb?
My parents said it came out of my palm
like a sundial.
If you still had it,
you'd never need a watch.
They didn't have money
for special mittens, so it had to go.
We're in the last lap.
It's me and Rusty Wallace in one and two
I'm so close to him,
I can smell his cologne.
The man loved Paco Rabanne.
Honestly, he bathed in it.
We would always be like,
"Rusty, a little dab."
[glugging sounds]
- Hey, hey, hey.
- [laughing]
Crazy. He went nuts. Whatever.
Anyway, final turn, I get next to him,
look him right in the eyes,
and flip him off.
Then I slingshot past him
to take the lead.
- You won the race?
- No.
[chuckling] Story-killer.
No, Wallace puts me into the wall,
I flip upside down,
the car skids and stops eight feet
from the finish line.
Wow. That's horrible.
You think you gotta use the bathroom
at the end of a race,
wait till you're upside down.
[laughs]
Moral of the story, he hurt my car,
I hurt his feelings. So who won?
- Rusty Wallace?
- Yeah, you're right.
What'd you think, Frank?
Hilarious. Another A+ story, Kev.
Yeah what was it about?
About how he was a driver.
Yeah, that's all he talks about.
Stop looking at your phone
when we're together.
We all have to listen
to his boring stories, and so do you.
Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
I'm sorry my almost dying on national TV
is a yawn fest for you.
You tell a good story.
Tell the one
about the haircut you didn't like.
- Bangs?
- It's always bangs.
- Then why you keep doing it?
- Kevin.
You know I have a new boss in New York.
She needs to know I'm available 24/7.
So to get you to pay attention,
I either have to be your boss
or leftover lobster ravioli.
Just put your name on it.
Is that too much to ask?
- Promise we never get like that. Okay.
- Done.
I'm sorry. My phone is off.
- Thank you.
- No. I get it.
I once answered a phone at a funeral.
People were horrified, but I was like,
"What? I'm burying my old lawyer."
"I gotta get a new one."
What do you do, Frank?
I'm a financial analyst
at Kinnane Brothers.
Oh! No way. Charles is a friend.
Are you going to that hospital fundraiser?
Yeah, Beth and I are going.
Unless I'm still on trial
for Ravioli-gate.
Yeah, I'm over it.
The beer's kicked in. Thank you, beer.
Great. If you guys are going,
Kev, you should come with.
No, I hate hospitals.
I know I shouldn't, but I always look
in the rooms when I walk by,
and I'm like,
"Don't do it," and I looked, and was like,
"Oh, Grandma!
I thought those were your knees."
- And I was like, just
- [laughs]
You gotta keep it moving.
Kevin, it's not at a hospital.
You think we're walking around the ER,
sipping champagne?
You know what?
I'm on your side with the leftovers.
That's right.
You know, Morgan? I would love to go.
Yay! It's our second double date,
and this time it's gonna be fancy.
We have to go early.
There's a wine tasting.
They are featuring wines
from the Loire Valley.
Ooh. That's my third favorite valley,
after Hidden and Frankie.
[laughs]
[sighs] Hey, what are you wearing
to the event tonight?
My pajamas.
Who had August for Beth gives up on life?
I can't go tonight. Frank is going
to New York for a work emergency.
Are you kidding? I was counting on you.
Morgan might be networking.
Who will I make fun of people with?
We could've done that thing where
we sound like a couple from England.
[with British accent]
Who are charmed by their American ways.
All right, all right, all right.
[normal accent]
That is Matthew McConaughey.
Yeah, with a British accent.
It makes it pop.
[laughs] No. Please do not do that tonight
with Morgan.
What are you doing with Morgan?
Oh, we are going to a fundraiser
for the Children's Hospital,
not at the Children's Hospital.
She invited you to that?
I didn't know she was going.
Guess her first choice was available.
You could go with me.
No, just wanna be invited before him.
Oh yeah. No, I mean,
I didn't want to go anyway.
Did you talk to Morgan about the hauler?
Hey, when I say I'll do a thing,
I do the thing.
Did I say I'd do the thing?
Then I did the thing.
Great, 'cause I need you
to do another thing.
I found these really high-end ones.
That way,
when we go to a race people will say,
"Wow, Catherine Spencer
is running a kick-ass organization there."
"Did she get a new power suit?
It looks fabulous."
Consider it done.
You didn't get a new hauler.
No. I forgot to ask Morgan.
Why did you tell Catherine you did?
Because I didn't think
about the consequences.
[rock music playing]
Now, what was that you were using?
Amir, I don't have time.
I gotta get this car ready for Sunday.
Kevin wanted us to spend time with Jake
'cause he wants to learn about the car.
We should support that.
- You do?
- Yeah.
He just asked me what a thermos was.
We can't replace the springs
during the race, right?
So, we adjust the wedge
to make it tighter or looser.
[Jake] No, no, let me do this.
If I keep turning this,
is a clown gonna pop out?
I've been burned by this before.
[popping noise]
[metal clanging]
How important is this?
Well, without that, you'll crash
into the wall at 180 miles per hour.
But, hey, just get rid of it.
Come on. If I don't work on the car,
how am I supposed to learn?
It's not like they write books about this.
You're not real familiar with books,
are you?
I brought you one after Kevin mentioned
that you were interested. Here.
The Psychics of NASCAR? Awesome.
No, Jake, it's The Physics of NASCAR.
Just let him read it. He'll find out.
He got the cover wrong.
Three hundred pages?
This is gonna take me forever.
Yeah, let's hope so.
Okay.
Great. I'm the only one without a tie.
Makes you look distinguished,
in an "I didn't bother
to read the invitation" kind of way.
I know I hide it well but,
I gotta be honest,
I'm very uncomfortable
in these situations,
so please don't leave me.
You've got nothing to worry about.
You have the most interesting job here.
You're a NASCAR crew chief.
All right, you're right.
Yeah, let's have a good time.
Ooh, Itzhak Perlman tickets.
How great would that be?
Be awesome
if I knew who Itzhak Perlman was.
He has an amazing story.
He got polio as a kid,
he walks with leg braces,
but he became
the world's best violin player.
It's amazing, but do you play the violin
with your legs?
Kevin, you can't joke about polio.
I'm not making fun of polio, Marco.
- Marco?
- Polio.
Stop! [laughs]
Oh…
Stan Fitzsimmons.
He wants me to invest in his company.
Does it look like I'm smiling?
Either that or you took a gut punch.
- Fitzy.
- You have not returned my calls.
I told you. I've gotta talk to my team.
- Morgan?
- Oh!
Kevin, this is Stan and Michael.
- How you doing?
- Hey, guys. Nice to see you.
- [cell phone ringing]
- Sorry.
Gosh, I've gotta take this.
It's Japan. I am so sorry.
- I should go with you, right?
- Sorry. I'll be back.
So Kevin, what line of work you in?
Oh, I'm a crew chief for a NASCAR team.
Oh. Good for you.
- So what are you working on, Michael?
- Right now we're focusing on algae.
Ah. It's a great idea in theory,
but how many guys went down that rat hole?
[chuckles] Rat hole.
What? You don't think it'll work?
You know, I mean, it could.
Or it could not.
I mean, it depends. I just
The whole thing is just kind of crazy.
- What's crazy?
- Hmm?
You just said it's crazy.
Just how everything went down.
- How what went down?
- The whole thing.
- What whole thing?
- Son of a bitch.
So, what's your solution
to climate change, Kevin?
Well, I would swing back
to Michael's side,
and I think you should kill all the algae.
You know, yeah.
Kill all the algae?
Well, that would be
an ecological disaster.
Let me finish, okay?
What I'm saying is Michael's killing it
with the algae, you know?
We're all speaking the same language here.
- I have no idea what he's saying.
- Yeah.
Wait, hold on a second.
Yep. I gotta take this.
Southern Pennsylvania.
[rock music playing]
[car accelerating on simulator]
Hey. How much longer will you be here?
The parking lot
gets kinda spooky at night.
I'll be fine walking to my car.
Wasn't talking about you.
Let me concentrate.
- Trying to beat your time?
- No.
I'm trying to beat your time,
if you have to know.
I've run this lap 300 times,
and still haven't come
within half a second of your best.
I tried to tell you I was great.
You know what?
Never mind. I'm out of here.
I'll tell you what you're doing wrong.
You need to get on the throttle sooner
out of turn two.
But what if I spin out?
What if you don't? When you're driving,
do you feel the car
wanting to give more than it should?
No.
The stupid car never tells me anything.
Maybe it's because you call it stupid.
Sometimes, I think it knows.
I can't tell you how crazy it makes me
that you just bumble your dumb ass
into a cockpit
and get around the track so fast.
Wanna know what I was doing tonight?
Pushing a door labeled "pull"?
I was reading about the technical stuff
because I'm jealous you know everything.
Hmm. How far did you get?
That's not important.
- Want me to show you how I get around?
- That'd be very cool. Thank you.
You're a great driver, and you'll get it.
You just have to let go and feel it.
But I like to be in control.
You think you do, until you're not.
- What if something bad happens?
- What do you think that would be?
Are you as turned on as I am?
[laughs] No.
Yeah, no, me neither. That's stupid.
[with British accent] How'd it go, Nigel?
Where was that voice when I needed it?
[normal accent] Ooh, that bad?
Ever wondered
how they turn algae into fuel?
- Never once.
- Exactly.
Was Morgan boring too?
No, no. She's great. It's just
I don't think we're gonna work out.
What? Why? You guys have been having
so much fun.
We don't have much in common.
You should have seen her last night.
She was schmoozing, making deals.
She was just in her element.
Like me at one of Chuck's barbecues.
Where I'm walking around,
eating ribs, blowing up old refrigerators,
wishing we'd moved the refrigerator
further from the house.
You just saw work her.
She likes what she does. So do you.
Yeah, but I'm the same everywhere.
This is the real her.
I just think we're from different worlds.
You know you do this every time, right?
You meet someone, they're perfect,
then you start looking for problems
and blow the whole thing up.
Dr. Phil calls it self-sabotage.
You know he's not a real doctor, right?
And I'm pretty sure
that mustache is a clip-on.
And if anyone self-sabotages,
it's you with Frank.
What? That is not true.
You exploded over him eating ravioli.
Lobster ravioli. You wanna do this?
You broke up with Mary
because she cut her hair too short.
Yeah. She looked like my uncle Rick.
It creeped me out.
And what about Lawyer Todd?
But He wore a puka shell necklace.
At least give me that one.
Okay. So, Rita? What was her problem?
She had sweaty fingers.
It was like holding hands with a frog.
And what about when you broke up
with Ryan 'cause he was too sensitive?
Kevin, he was gay.
Oh, that's right.
My bad.
He's good people. He's good people.
All right, yes, maybe we both do it.
But you really like Morgan, don't you?
I do.
The real her is the one that's into you.
I can tell.
And why wouldn't she be? You're amazing.
Come on.
Spider-Man's amazing.
I'm just really good.
[giggles]
All right, go on, have fun.
See where it goes.
End the cycle.
Dr. Phil?
No, Rachael Ray.
She does more than make food.
She makes me think.
I'm sorry, am I late?
No. Perfect. Come on, have a seat.
I got here early
because I wanted to get our usual table.
I think it's there, but very sweet.
Yeah. I tried that one first
but it was one of those jiggly ones,
so I was hoping you wouldn't remember.
Look, I want to apologize for last night.
I wasn't the greatest company.
No, no. I'm sorry. I felt so guilty
I kept getting called away.
[clears throat] Can I be honest with you?
I'd rather you didn't.
Nothing good ever comes after
"Can I be honest with you?"
All right, here it goes.
Cards on the table.
I was worried we come
from different worlds and all that,
but then I started thinking about it,
and I was realizing,
you're looking for something
to be wrong here. You know?
Dr. Phil calls it self-sabotage.
Kevin, he's not a real doctor.
[laughs] Yeah, that's what I said. See?
This is gonna work.
- What's gonna work?
- Us.
Uh, that's what I wanted to tell you.
I'm all in. You know?
I was worried about distance,
but I don't care.
I'm gonna visit you in California.
And is it gonna be easy? No.
But is it worth it?
Yeah. It's totally worth it.
Are we worth it? Absolutely.
So, here's what I'm doing.
I'm just gonna do it, I don't even care.
I'm taking my heart and putting it there
in the center of the table.
And that's yours.
Yeah.
Ah…
You mean "ah" like "feels so right"?
- Can I be honest with you?
- Please don't.
Kevin, you're an amazing guy,
and I love hanging out with you,
I just I'm not really looking
for a relationship.
- I thought maybe this would just be fun
- Yeah, of course Totally fun.
You know what's more fun?
Forgetting the last three minutes.
- Let's do that.
- No. I'm sorry.
Seems like you wanted something
more serious, and I'm not there, and
This was a bad idea.
I should go before it gets awkward.
No. Come on, we're adults.
We can get past this ugly stuff and just
We're fine. It's not even awkward at all.
It's fine.
Just, uh
Just gonna do this.
- I'm gonna go.
- Okay.
I'll see you soon.
- Morgan, hold up.
- Please don't.
I will hook up with you out of pity,
regret it, and then get a new dog.
It's not about us. Uh…
Catherine was looking for a hauler, and
[mumbles]
Can I have some money?
- Hey, Kevin.
- Hey. Here's the check for the hauler.
Oh. Look. This is awkward,
but I talked to Morgan
and I heard you two aren't You know.
Go ahead.
I know. Say you told me so.
Morgan only dates rich smart guys,
and I cheated on my SATs
and barely broke 800.
True story.
Don't know why I'm telling you.
Not that I don't have a million insults
in the holster
I actually thought of another one
looking at you.
But, I've been in your shoes.
It sucks. I'm sorry that happened to you.
Oh.
All right, well, thank you. I'll be fine.
Let me know when you are.
'Cause I'm saving them up.
She's back.
Oh, good, you're here.
Travel plans are here, paychecks are here,
and the Tums are here.
Yeah, I don't need Tums.
When we head out to Michigan,
that chili place is right there.
I'd tell you not to go, but you will.
I'd tell you not to get the fire sauce,
but you will.
So, here are the Tums.
Wait. Where are you going?
I took your advice.
I'm getting frustrated
with Frank over the little stuff.
We had a good talk, and he invited me up
to New York for a romantic getaway.
I gotta get my flight.
Oh, call me if you need me.
But, seriously, don't call me.
Oh, crap. I forgot.
How did it go with Morgan?
Actually, um…
It was great. It was.
- Yeah?
- Thank you for your advice.
I knew it.
I knew you two were perfect together.
Say it. Say "Beth was right."
Say it.
- Beth was right.
- [giggles]
Well, normally, I'd make you do that
until it felt more sincere,
but I have an Uber here.
Have fun in New York. I won't bother you.
- Hey, where are my, uh
- [Beth] They're on your head.
[theme music playing]