The End Of The F***ing World (2017) s01e07 Episode Script
Episode 7
1 Hi, Dad.
Oh, my God.
Alyssa? He smells exactly the same.
I thought I should give Alyssa and her dad some space.
He a poof? He's my boyfriend.
Is that mine? Yeah.
Suits you.
Well, you turned out all right, didn't you? You're gorgeous.
Shut up.
No, no, I'm serious.
You were a fucking weird-looking kid.
I'm relieved.
Smoke? How's your ma? Yeah, fine.
Married to a total dick, but fine.
Can we stay with you for a bit? Please say yes.
Of course you can.
You're my blood, girl.
Cool, thanks.
So, you run away, then? From your ma's? You're my blood all right.
HE EXHALES AND CHUCKLES We're in trouble.
Pregnant? Worse.
How much worse? A lot.
I will tell him what we've done .
.
at some point.
We didn't know where else to go.
Well, you're as safe as houses here.
OK? You can stay as long as you want.
Thanks.
You all right, James? That becomes a bed.
Oh, what, like a fold-out? Cool.
No, just it becomes a bed if you sleep on it.
I'm through the back there and the bathroom's in there.
Oh, it's so good to see you, girl.
Sleep tight.
He's all right.
He's actually, genuinely all right.
DOOR CLOSES HE HOWLS Leslie was pretty different.
James.
Yeah? Do you want to throw knives with me? What? You've never thrown a knife before? Uh, no.
Take your shirt off.
HE EXHALES Ooh! Not bad.
Beginner's luck.
Yeah, right.
Want a beer? Do you look after her, James? Yeah.
Good.
That's very good.
She ever mention me? Yeah.
And? Does she .
.
love me, do you think? Yeah.
I've never met someone like Leslie.
Not an adult.
He seemed like one, most of the time, but it was like he was missing parts.
What's she done to her hair? Oh, God As you can see, your children have seem to have committed another serious crime.
She's not doing anything, is she? It's It's him.
He's the one with the fucking gun.
Gwen! Do you know where James may have got a gun from? He never had a gun.
He only ever had his knife.
What the hell is the matter with you? DOOR SLAMS HE SIGHS It's his birthday tomorrow.
He'll be 18.
Here, look.
Look at him.
She killed herself, his mum.
She did it in front of him.
I hope you like these well done.
Well done as in, like, fucking cremated.
ROCK RADIO PLAYS Dig in! Thanks, Dad.
I love saying that.
Slainte.
Well, you should come out on my boat.
You've got a boat? Not flashy.
A little cruddy cabin, but she's cute.
Take us out this afternoon, if you want.
Cool.
I can't believe I've got a dad with a boat.
It basically means that I've got a boat.
Right, let's do it! Leslie! Les! What? Did you not see the note? I stuck it on your fridge.
Oh, for fuck's sake! Today? Like, now? Can't you do it? No, I got to take dad to be bled.
All right, change of plan.
We'll do the boat later, OK? Why? I've just got to do a bit of work from home.
You just chill out here, OK? OK.
It would seem safe to assume they're headed to Alyssa's father, Leslie Foley.
He's got previous.
Nothing major.
Cautions and suspended.
The local PCs, they checked him out when we identified Alyssa, but he no longer lives at his given address.
But she thinks he still does.
So we move out there, and we wait for them to show up.
He's going to take us.
I know.
I think your dad's a drug dealer.
Cool.
But What? It seemed like Alyssa was deliberately missing the point.
Is this the best place for us to stay? WHISPERING: We killed a guy.
No way am I leaving yet.
Stop worrying.
He's going to look after us.
We're totally safe here.
Oh! SHE LAUGHS We definitely weren't safe.
We have to find them before they do anything else.
Or we could let them carry on for a couple of days.
What? Well, he's 18 tomorrow.
That's proper prison, that is.
I'm joking.
He's just a kid.
No, he's not.
Go easy on these.
What? Nothing.
Well, they've got to get it from someone.
It's completely ethical.
That's the beauty of it.
Everything's locally sourced.
Organic.
No gang war for that bullshit.
No women swallowing condoms.
No kids getting hurt.
This world, man.
"Hey kids, don't do drugs, "but do nag your mum to buy you a phone, "hewn from the sweat and tears of a modern slave.
" You understand me, don't you, girl? Yeah.
Got to fight the system.
Got to, kiddo.
Because we live in properly fucked up times.
Don't you forget that.
The wisest thing anyone's ever said to me, right? Want to hear this? James, you listening? Yeah.
"To be mad in a deranged world, "is not madness.
It's sanity.
" Who said that? Me.
He's basically Gandhi.
You are golden, you know that? Golden.
Leslie talked a lot.
Want one? SHE EXHALES No, thanks.
You know, Clive Clark could have well have been self-defence.
Well, we don't have proof, so you can't assume that.
You can't assume the opposite.
I feel sorry for them, all right? I do.
I think they're miserable, fucked up, stupid kids who've done something bad but we don't know why I don't care why.
I care that we catch them before they kill someone else.
Terry, I'm not We're not Social Services.
That's not What good does feeling sorry for them do? What does it actually do? We need to find them.
We find them.
What, with an armed response unit that scares the shit out of them? So what do you suggest? We coax him out with a giant Toblerone and hope for the best? I'm still not convinced he was armed.
Well, we're going to have to behave like he was.
Is this about something else? What? No! OK.
Sorry.
I just think someone should talk to them, not wave a gun at them.
Well, someone is very welcome to talk to them as soon as they're locked up.
Talk to them.
Understand them.
Oh, and teach them fucking whittling, I don't care.
So what do you think of him? Sometimes it was important to lie.
Yeah, he's all right.
All right? All right like good.
You don't get it.
All right, who's for a pint? Are we not going on the boat? I'm knackered, do you mind? I'll take you out tomorrow, I promise.
OK.
Cross my heart.
OK.
Come on, James.
COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYS # Oh, daddy # You know you make me cry # How can you love me? I don't understand why VOICEOVER: It's so weird, when you've wanted something for so long and you've been so frightened it'll be shit, and then, it's not shit at all.
It's amazing.
# It's good to believe Yes, it's good to believe.
What are you drinking? You haven't seen either of them? I told you, no.
And Leslie? No idea.
He moved out months ago.
Just in case.
Alyssa.
Yeah? COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYS Maybe we shouldn't stay here too long.
What? I just think that we should maybe keep moving.
Do what you want.
# If you tell me that she's not here I'll follow the trail of her tears Missed you, darling.
That's how I got to Memphis Look at you! Look at you! Hey, hey! What? Let's do the thing.
What thing? Yeah? Oh, yeah.
HE LAUGHS Alyssa felt far away from me.
That she'd come back to Memphis someday It was like we'd gone back.
# That's how I got to Memphis That's how I got to Memphis Haven't seen you in ten years.
HE SOBS Dad? What is it? What? It's just that I'm fucking useless.
Fuck.
No, you're not! What? You aren't useless.
A card every year without fail, I think that's a pretty good dad.
It's all right.
It's all right.
I'll never rest till I find out why I started to think that maybe I should just go.
Leave Alyssa with her dad.
She seemed happy.
I'm not even joking, right.
Shorts.
That's it.
The whole year round.
He doesn't even own a pair of trousers, do you, Jonno? No.
What did you wear to your mum's funeral? Black shorts.
Black shorts! Black fucking shorts! But then everything changed.
Les, Les! You found him, then.
Oh, come on, Debbie, not now.
Yeah, come over here.
No, no, Debbie.
Honestly, you should go home.
I'm serious, sweetheart.
We'd only end up rowing, and you don't want that.
Come here! She's a bit unstable, you know, in the head.
SHE WHISPERS VOICEOVER: Are you fucking kidding me? WHISPERING: Big deal, like you never did that.
DEBBIE: I need you to take an interest.
I can't do this on my own.
DEBBIE: It's just not fair.
OK, OK.
LES: I'm listening.
What do you need? DEBBIE: He needs a new school uniform.
Why? VOICEOVER: No, no.
DEBBIE: Because he's grown about five inches in a week and he looks like a prick! And what do you want me to do about it? He's not going to stop fucking growing, is he? DEBBIE: Give me some money.
Is he your dad? Oh, no, look, Alyssa, it's nothing.
He's just Were you going to tell me? Oh, man, this is too much.
This is like some kind of fucking ambush or something.
I'm going home.
DEBBIE: Hey, no, you're not! Get fucking back here, Leslie! ENGINE STARTS CRACKING AND DOG WHIMPERING Yeah, we'll get some sleep now.
OK, bye.
So the local team have set up surveillance at his ex-girlfriend's.
There's no sign of the kids yet.
We'll go back over first thing.
SHE EXHALES Um Do you want to share a room? What? Save the taxpayer.
No, I don't.
I, uh Two single rooms, please.
His neck's broken.
DOG WHIMPERS We have to kill it.
Yeah.
DOG WHIMPERS I can't do it.
Are you crying? No.
HE SNIFFS DOG WHIMPERS DOG GRUNTS HE BREATHES HEAVILY PHONE BEEPS Holy fuck.
Oh, my God.
Alyssa? He smells exactly the same.
I thought I should give Alyssa and her dad some space.
He a poof? He's my boyfriend.
Is that mine? Yeah.
Suits you.
Well, you turned out all right, didn't you? You're gorgeous.
Shut up.
No, no, I'm serious.
You were a fucking weird-looking kid.
I'm relieved.
Smoke? How's your ma? Yeah, fine.
Married to a total dick, but fine.
Can we stay with you for a bit? Please say yes.
Of course you can.
You're my blood, girl.
Cool, thanks.
So, you run away, then? From your ma's? You're my blood all right.
HE EXHALES AND CHUCKLES We're in trouble.
Pregnant? Worse.
How much worse? A lot.
I will tell him what we've done .
.
at some point.
We didn't know where else to go.
Well, you're as safe as houses here.
OK? You can stay as long as you want.
Thanks.
You all right, James? That becomes a bed.
Oh, what, like a fold-out? Cool.
No, just it becomes a bed if you sleep on it.
I'm through the back there and the bathroom's in there.
Oh, it's so good to see you, girl.
Sleep tight.
He's all right.
He's actually, genuinely all right.
DOOR CLOSES HE HOWLS Leslie was pretty different.
James.
Yeah? Do you want to throw knives with me? What? You've never thrown a knife before? Uh, no.
Take your shirt off.
HE EXHALES Ooh! Not bad.
Beginner's luck.
Yeah, right.
Want a beer? Do you look after her, James? Yeah.
Good.
That's very good.
She ever mention me? Yeah.
And? Does she .
.
love me, do you think? Yeah.
I've never met someone like Leslie.
Not an adult.
He seemed like one, most of the time, but it was like he was missing parts.
What's she done to her hair? Oh, God As you can see, your children have seem to have committed another serious crime.
She's not doing anything, is she? It's It's him.
He's the one with the fucking gun.
Gwen! Do you know where James may have got a gun from? He never had a gun.
He only ever had his knife.
What the hell is the matter with you? DOOR SLAMS HE SIGHS It's his birthday tomorrow.
He'll be 18.
Here, look.
Look at him.
She killed herself, his mum.
She did it in front of him.
I hope you like these well done.
Well done as in, like, fucking cremated.
ROCK RADIO PLAYS Dig in! Thanks, Dad.
I love saying that.
Slainte.
Well, you should come out on my boat.
You've got a boat? Not flashy.
A little cruddy cabin, but she's cute.
Take us out this afternoon, if you want.
Cool.
I can't believe I've got a dad with a boat.
It basically means that I've got a boat.
Right, let's do it! Leslie! Les! What? Did you not see the note? I stuck it on your fridge.
Oh, for fuck's sake! Today? Like, now? Can't you do it? No, I got to take dad to be bled.
All right, change of plan.
We'll do the boat later, OK? Why? I've just got to do a bit of work from home.
You just chill out here, OK? OK.
It would seem safe to assume they're headed to Alyssa's father, Leslie Foley.
He's got previous.
Nothing major.
Cautions and suspended.
The local PCs, they checked him out when we identified Alyssa, but he no longer lives at his given address.
But she thinks he still does.
So we move out there, and we wait for them to show up.
He's going to take us.
I know.
I think your dad's a drug dealer.
Cool.
But What? It seemed like Alyssa was deliberately missing the point.
Is this the best place for us to stay? WHISPERING: We killed a guy.
No way am I leaving yet.
Stop worrying.
He's going to look after us.
We're totally safe here.
Oh! SHE LAUGHS We definitely weren't safe.
We have to find them before they do anything else.
Or we could let them carry on for a couple of days.
What? Well, he's 18 tomorrow.
That's proper prison, that is.
I'm joking.
He's just a kid.
No, he's not.
Go easy on these.
What? Nothing.
Well, they've got to get it from someone.
It's completely ethical.
That's the beauty of it.
Everything's locally sourced.
Organic.
No gang war for that bullshit.
No women swallowing condoms.
No kids getting hurt.
This world, man.
"Hey kids, don't do drugs, "but do nag your mum to buy you a phone, "hewn from the sweat and tears of a modern slave.
" You understand me, don't you, girl? Yeah.
Got to fight the system.
Got to, kiddo.
Because we live in properly fucked up times.
Don't you forget that.
The wisest thing anyone's ever said to me, right? Want to hear this? James, you listening? Yeah.
"To be mad in a deranged world, "is not madness.
It's sanity.
" Who said that? Me.
He's basically Gandhi.
You are golden, you know that? Golden.
Leslie talked a lot.
Want one? SHE EXHALES No, thanks.
You know, Clive Clark could have well have been self-defence.
Well, we don't have proof, so you can't assume that.
You can't assume the opposite.
I feel sorry for them, all right? I do.
I think they're miserable, fucked up, stupid kids who've done something bad but we don't know why I don't care why.
I care that we catch them before they kill someone else.
Terry, I'm not We're not Social Services.
That's not What good does feeling sorry for them do? What does it actually do? We need to find them.
We find them.
What, with an armed response unit that scares the shit out of them? So what do you suggest? We coax him out with a giant Toblerone and hope for the best? I'm still not convinced he was armed.
Well, we're going to have to behave like he was.
Is this about something else? What? No! OK.
Sorry.
I just think someone should talk to them, not wave a gun at them.
Well, someone is very welcome to talk to them as soon as they're locked up.
Talk to them.
Understand them.
Oh, and teach them fucking whittling, I don't care.
So what do you think of him? Sometimes it was important to lie.
Yeah, he's all right.
All right? All right like good.
You don't get it.
All right, who's for a pint? Are we not going on the boat? I'm knackered, do you mind? I'll take you out tomorrow, I promise.
OK.
Cross my heart.
OK.
Come on, James.
COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYS # Oh, daddy # You know you make me cry # How can you love me? I don't understand why VOICEOVER: It's so weird, when you've wanted something for so long and you've been so frightened it'll be shit, and then, it's not shit at all.
It's amazing.
# It's good to believe Yes, it's good to believe.
What are you drinking? You haven't seen either of them? I told you, no.
And Leslie? No idea.
He moved out months ago.
Just in case.
Alyssa.
Yeah? COUNTRY MUSIC PLAYS Maybe we shouldn't stay here too long.
What? I just think that we should maybe keep moving.
Do what you want.
# If you tell me that she's not here I'll follow the trail of her tears Missed you, darling.
That's how I got to Memphis Look at you! Look at you! Hey, hey! What? Let's do the thing.
What thing? Yeah? Oh, yeah.
HE LAUGHS Alyssa felt far away from me.
That she'd come back to Memphis someday It was like we'd gone back.
# That's how I got to Memphis That's how I got to Memphis Haven't seen you in ten years.
HE SOBS Dad? What is it? What? It's just that I'm fucking useless.
Fuck.
No, you're not! What? You aren't useless.
A card every year without fail, I think that's a pretty good dad.
It's all right.
It's all right.
I'll never rest till I find out why I started to think that maybe I should just go.
Leave Alyssa with her dad.
She seemed happy.
I'm not even joking, right.
Shorts.
That's it.
The whole year round.
He doesn't even own a pair of trousers, do you, Jonno? No.
What did you wear to your mum's funeral? Black shorts.
Black shorts! Black fucking shorts! But then everything changed.
Les, Les! You found him, then.
Oh, come on, Debbie, not now.
Yeah, come over here.
No, no, Debbie.
Honestly, you should go home.
I'm serious, sweetheart.
We'd only end up rowing, and you don't want that.
Come here! She's a bit unstable, you know, in the head.
SHE WHISPERS VOICEOVER: Are you fucking kidding me? WHISPERING: Big deal, like you never did that.
DEBBIE: I need you to take an interest.
I can't do this on my own.
DEBBIE: It's just not fair.
OK, OK.
LES: I'm listening.
What do you need? DEBBIE: He needs a new school uniform.
Why? VOICEOVER: No, no.
DEBBIE: Because he's grown about five inches in a week and he looks like a prick! And what do you want me to do about it? He's not going to stop fucking growing, is he? DEBBIE: Give me some money.
Is he your dad? Oh, no, look, Alyssa, it's nothing.
He's just Were you going to tell me? Oh, man, this is too much.
This is like some kind of fucking ambush or something.
I'm going home.
DEBBIE: Hey, no, you're not! Get fucking back here, Leslie! ENGINE STARTS CRACKING AND DOG WHIMPERING Yeah, we'll get some sleep now.
OK, bye.
So the local team have set up surveillance at his ex-girlfriend's.
There's no sign of the kids yet.
We'll go back over first thing.
SHE EXHALES Um Do you want to share a room? What? Save the taxpayer.
No, I don't.
I, uh Two single rooms, please.
His neck's broken.
DOG WHIMPERS We have to kill it.
Yeah.
DOG WHIMPERS I can't do it.
Are you crying? No.
HE SNIFFS DOG WHIMPERS DOG GRUNTS HE BREATHES HEAVILY PHONE BEEPS Holy fuck.