The Worst Witch (2017) s01e07 Episode Script

Enid Nightshade.
Maud Spellbody.
Mildred Hubble.
How fortunate that tonight is parents' evening.
I shall be speaking to all of your parents personally.
Well, at least she didn't make us clean this up.
And clean this up! I'll just have to ask my dad to make a bigger donation than usual now.
It won't make any difference.
My mum's already expecting it to be terrible.
Well, my parents aren't, and they're not rich either.
They can't just buy their way out of a bad report.
Loving the new look, girls.
You're year head, and you're giving the closing address later.
They won't be upset over one little mistake.
One? What about the time I failed my flying test? But that was my fault, really.
- The time I got you turned into a frog? - I got me turned into a frog.
Now I've blown up the potions lab.
I mixed up my will of bat with my eye of newt.
Every teacher's gonna have it in for me tonight.
Even if they do, so what? Your parents will get over it.
- You really don't know them.
- Hello! - Hello! - Hello! You've got the mirror the wrong way round.
- I told you.
- You told me that way! No, the other way! There.
Honestly, Maud, he's hopeless with magic.
I can't be brilliant at everything, can I? Unlike my daughter.
We're all set for tonight! Your mother can't wait to see Cackle's again! It's the first time she's been there since she was a pupil.
Oh, which reminds me I've cleared a space for your Year One witching certificate! Yeah, about that, Mum We can't wait to find out what you've been getting up to.
- Bye! - Bye! Love you.
- Love you.
Sending you a cake.
- Bye.
I feel bad for Maud.
She'd never have been in trouble if she hadn't made friends with me.
She'd never have had any good times, either.
I should go and watch the door.
My mum will be the only one not arriving by broomstick.
She's walking up the mountain? Don't you think she's trying a little too hard not to be a witch? OK, I know I said she might have had some secret witchy past, but it doesn't make sense.
I'd know.
Witches are very good at hiding their magic, Millie.
My mum's not even good at hiding my birthday presents.
Top of the wardrobe, every single year.
Better go and see if she's here.
What's up, Maud? I can't do it to them.
I can't let my parents find out what a boil and bubble I've made of everything.
Well, you'll have to, unless you're going to use some serious pirated magic to fix everything and that's not very you, is it? You don't approve of pirated magic.
But if I did Forgetting powder.
Forgetting powder? When it works, it can get you out of very sticky situations.
I was glad I had it when you caught me copying out all of your homework.
- I don't remember that.
- Exactly.
Forgetting powder is very unpredictable.
Are you sure you want to do this? She's here.
My mother's here! You sound surprised.
I'm not surprised.
I never had any doubt.
Are you saying my mother's only interested in Esmeralda's education? No? - No.
- Good.
- Well met, Mother.
- Well met, Ethel.
How delightful to be here.
I saved you this.
I'll pass, thank you.
Got to fit into the ceremonial robes for Esmie's prize- giving, after all.
Shall we go, darling? Miss Drill? Miss Drill? You haven't seen my mum, have you? Oh, yes, she's over there speaking to to Mr.
Nightshade.
My PA just booked us into a volcano cave.
They are the next big witch holiday destination.
Would you mind signing this for me? Caves are so expensive during the school holidays, though.
We may have to stay at home this year.
What about you, Julie? Um, well, I'm thinking of investing in a mobile cave.
I mean, your familiars can come with you, so you don't have to pay for a magic-friendly cattery or anything, which is a bonus.
- Mum? - Ooh.
Mildred.
Didn't see you there.
All right? - Hi, Dad! - Enid.
Your mum's stuck at the manicurist.
But don't worry, I'm pumped to defend you of whatever you've done wrong this time.
We have to see Miss Hardbroom.
I feel an expensive night's coming on.
Right, who have we got first? This way, is it? What is keeping Maud? Yes! Ah- ha! Flying certificate.
Frog transformation homework.
What else do I need to add, Midnight? Um Oh, let's just say everything I've done since I've got here.
Every potion I mixed wrong.
Each daft thing I said in class.
Every test I didn't come top of.
When this powder you intake, forget my every witch mistake.
From HB.
"See me.
" It hasn't worked, Midnight.
Oh, there she is.
- Hey! - Hi, Mum, Dad.
Hey! This was my corridor, you know.
I mean, obviously it's changed a lot since then.
It's it's so modern now.
Oh! If I'd had the opportunities that young witches have today, I might have got a lot farther.
Can you tell how much your mother's been looking forward to this? Come here.
No biggie.
All we have to do is buy new potion lab equipment.
Miss Hardbroom thinks she's a big deal, but she doesn't scare me.
- I'm out of here.
- Dad! The Spellbodys.
Enter.
What's the spell for ground opening up below you, again? Oh, you'll be all right.
- The forgetting powder didn't work.
- What forgetting powder? Very funny I don't think.
It was necessary to see you this evening, not only as your daughter's potions teacher but as deputy head.
This is because Strange, I I can't remember why it was necessary.
I can't think of a time when she's been on the losing side.
She really is an exemplary sports witch.
But right now, I can't recall.
Not one occasion did I have to correct her chanting or remark on her tempo.
She has been note- perfect all term.
A flawless understanding of animal physiognomy.
I only wish the other girls were more like Maud.
So Maud must be doing very well.
Very well indeed? So if we survive HB, we have spell science next then flying, then advanced chanting.
I thought advanced chanting was Year Two.
It is.
But how would you know that? Millie! Excuse us one moment.
It's like a dream.
The teachers didn't even mention the flying test, the frog not even the explosion.
Sorry, what are you talking about? I got hold of some forgetting powder to make everyone forget my mistakes.
Please don't get mad.
It worked.
It really, really worked.
OK, but I don't know why you're telling me this.
I can't remember you ever speaking to me before.
You can't remember? I'm pleased you're having a good parents' evening.
Mildred Hubble.
She's forgotten me.
Of course she has.
What does everyone think my biggest mistake at Cackle's is? Making friends with Mildred Hubble.
Week four: transformed fellow pupil into pig.
Week five: embarrassed entire school in front of the Great Wizard in several ways.
- Week six - I'm sorry.
This is all very well, but I don't really see that it's relevant.
Miss Hubble, as an ordinary person, I realize you are not acquainted with the Witches' Code.
- However - Oh, section two, sub-section C, perhaps.
The bit about senior witches having a duty of care for junior witches.
It doesn't sound as though that's what's happened here.
We are talking about a complete lack of magical control.
You see, the way I read it, the code is mainly about not deliberately harming others, using magic for personal gain or publicly exposing other witches.
So which rule has Mildred actually broken? Right, well, if there's nothing else, I think we have other appointments to get to.
Mum, since when did you know about the Witches' Code? Sorry.
I like to be invisible on parents' evening keep a discreet eye on things, you know.
I'll take it from here.
I realize Miss Hardbroom can be a little brusque.
You could say that.
However, I'm forced to admit that she may have a point.
Sorry? I have been in two minds about this, but blowing up the potion lab today was the final straw.
I also feel that Mildred Hubble has not really found her feet.
Perhaps, if she had a friend to guide her Well, she's got Enid.
the right kind of friend, a steadying influence, things might be different, but she hasn't connected with anyone like that.
I'm afraid everything she's touched has turned to disaster.
- Now, I've been through this once.
- No, Mum.
She's right.
I don't belong here.
Sorry, Dad.
Second- worst witch.
Wait till I tell your mother.
Enid! It's terrible! Mildred's forgotten that we're friends.
You're telling me this why? Don't say you've forgotten, too.
This is a little bit weird, so You gave me some pirated forgetting powder so that I'd have a perfect parents' evening.
Sounds like something I'd do.
Look.
My handwriting.
How do I reverse the magic? I don't know.
I'm not losing my best friend.
You're going to help.
I'll get you a magic tutor.
We'll apply to a different academy.
Why didn't you tell me you were a witch? What makes you think I'm a witch? I heard you with the other parents, and only witches know the Witches' Code.
All this time, you've been hiding it from me.
Why? Mildred.
If I'd had the same start in life as the rest of the girls, maybe I wouldn't be leaving.
Millie! I don't have time for this nonsense right now.
I need to have one last look around before I go forever.
- What? - Forever? Miss Cackle said it herself, I don't fit in, and I don't have a role model, and she's right.
What does she mean? You have me.
A positive role model, Enid.
Oh.
Oh, no, this is all my fault! How can it be? I hardly know you.
But you do.
We're best friends.
The girl who's never made a mistake, best friends with the worst witch? Tell her.
I may have given her a forgetting powder.
The explosion at lunchtime, we were all there.
No, that was just me and Enid.
OK.
How did you get to Cackle's in the first place? Well, I I'm blanking on it at the moment.
I crash- landed onto your balcony.
How can you not even remember that? What does it matter how I arrived anyway? I'm not a pupil here anymore.
There's only one thing for it.
- I've got to tell the truth.
- That'll get you thrown out.
I don't care what happens to me if it saves Mildred.
It will also get me thrown out.
I'd be banned from every witching academy in the land.
Every witching academy? You didn't tell me it was that big of an offense.
There's got to be some other way.
Yes, Ethel continues to perform impressively in every subject.
What about extracurricular activities, Miss Cackle? You must tell Mother about those.
Oh, yes.
Ethel takes part in many out- of- hours activities: invisible netball, instrument- less orchestra, hat- making club.
In fact, she's the only member of that one.
Get back to your room, Sybil.
That That is wonderful news.
Mother, why are you talking to my little sister, my little sister who's at home? Don't fret about it, darling.
Now, who are we seeing next? Miss Bat, is it? You're not here, are you, Mother? Of course I'm here.
We're looking at each other, aren't we? OK, no, I'm not here.
A projection spell, Mother! How could you? You couldn't even be bothered making the trip.
Oh, come now, darling.
I will be here next month.
For Esmeralda's prize- giving, we know that.
You wouldn't miss Esmeralda's night for the world.
- Maud Spellbody, do you mind? - What do you want, Miss Perfect? I suppose your mother's super proud of you.
Thank you, Miss Cackle.
What is the meaning of bursting in? Miss Cackle, I heard that Mildred Hubble's leaving.
Sadly, she has chosen that path.
I'd like to volunteer to help her.
You, help Mildred Hubble? To keep her on the straight and narrow.
I'm just what she needs.
Well, thank you for that kind offer.
It's no less than I'd expect from you.
However, I can't remember ever seeing the two of you together.
I can't imagine how you'd get on.
Well, we'd make great friends, honestly! We wouldn't want to mar your impressive academic record with Mildred Hubble's penchant for disaster, would we? Mildred Hubble has quit? - It didn't work.
- Mildred's still leaving? It's obvious what you do.
The same thing I did when I had forgetting- powder accidents at school.
Dad! Raid the first-aid cupboard for remembering powder.
This is our last chance to save Millie.
Come on! Mmm! That's what I love about this school.
The snacks! I will never get used to that.
Quick, like your dad said, first- aid cupboard.
Quietly! Go, go, go! It's only a tiny bit.
Just enough for one go.
To this powder, all will surrender - Can you make my mum remember? - Millie, no! Mildred! I've looked everywhere for ya.
Oh.
I remember where the car keys are.
I remember the code for the alarm.
I remember where I put those fishcakes.
- The car boot's gonna stink a bit.
- But what about being a witch? Oh, I've told you, Mildred, I'm not a witch.
But the chat with the other parents, the Witches' Code.
Yeah.
As for the small talk, well, I just wanted to fit in with the other parents.
And the code Well, this school might be different in lots of ways, but it's the same as all the others with all the stuff it sends to parents.
Diary dates, school uniform list, dinner menus and the Witches' Code.
You're always telling me to be proud of who I am, not to pretend to be someone that I'm not.
Yes, I know.
I'm sorry.
I just didn't want to embarrass you.
I didn't want to be the worst mum.
I'm not seeing smiles.
I blew it.
Well, she blew it.
You realize that this girl is responsible for your daughter leaving the school, all because she didn't want to disappoint her parents.
I know.
I have to admit to what I've done whatever the consequences.
That won't make people remember.
They'll know you used forgetting power, but the memories won't come back.
Then how do I get them to remember? Don't worry, Maud, we all make mistakes.
No one's made a mistake as big as this.
Hey, I've made plenty bigger.
That's it! The mistakes you've made, Maud, they're just not big enough.
They're not? Surely if you were to do something truly disastrous, then no one will be able to forget it.
Even with forgetting powder.
It would break the spell.
But how am I going to make a huge mistake that everyone knows about before the end of the day? Whether it's been good or bad, I'm sure we will all be working to improve our performance next term.
Maud, where did you go? I'm really sorry for what's about to happen, Mum, Dad.
All that's left now is for me to hand over to our wonderful year head, Maud Spellbody.
Uh well met.
Um, to start, I'd like to thank a few people.
But I can't do that because I do not deserve to be up here.
I messed up.
I used forgetting powder on all of you to make sure I got good reports tonight.
Yes! Year head is mine.
And I did get them but I lost a friend.
And now, I need you to remember.
I need all of you to remember that Mildred Hubble and I are friends and that is not a mistake.
This, on the other hand, is a mistake.
What's she doing? - A very, very big - Oh, no! mistake.
Oh, no! Tell me that's not the potion we mixed at lunchtime.
It's the potion we mixed at lunchtime.
Did it work? Did it did it lift the spell? Maud Spellbody Miss Cackle's office, now! And Mildred Hubble and Enid Nightshade, always in it together.
You remember! It worked! Failed flying tests, accidental frog transformations, - blown- up potions labs, and now - Could I check? My daughter is the second- worst witch again, isn't she? She won't be a witch at all! After today's outrage, they should all be thrown out.
I find it hard to disagree.
Your money won't help this time, Mr.
Nightshade.
Did you not hear me, Mr.
Spellbody? Ah The thing is, Miss Hardbroom, I don't have that much spare cash, so I wasn't actually offering.
Though this may not all delight, you lot, forget about tonight.
Why are you all still here? Oh.
Did I offer you tea? - Yay! - Yes! I always carry some with me.
You never know when you're going to need it.
Dad, you fixed everything.
I rather think I did.
Anyone want an autograph? - I'm staying.
- We're all staying.
Sorry, Mum.
I would never hide anything from you.
Well, maybe your birthday presents.
You still don't know where they're kept, do you? Mum, if my magic doesn't come from you, where does it come from? Well, I'm sure you'll work that out for yourself someday.
Till then, you've just got to believe that you are good enough to be here.
And so do you, Mum.
The best mum.
I know you've seen a different side of me this evening.
Yes, we have.
And we are more proud of you than ever.
Standing up in front of everyone to admit what you'd done? That takes real guts, Maud.
But aren't you massively disappointed in me? What about all the stupid mistakes I've made since I've come here? Maud, why do you think I carry that powder? Mistakes are how you learn.
Mistakes are a sign that you tried.
And you never stop trying.
That's what makes you you.
Hey, you know what this calls for, don't you? - A family shot for the wall! - Shot for the wall! Cool!