Battlestar Galactica (1980) s01e08 Episode Script
The Night the Cylons Landed (2)
ADAMA: The great ship, Galactica.
Our home for these many years we've endured the wilderness of space And now we near the end of our journey We have at last found Earth NARRATOR: In a moment, Part II of "The Night the Cylons Landed," but first a few scenes from Part I Captain, I'm still echoing that slow-moving target.
Everything suggests a Cylon machine.
Visual sighting, sir.
She's coming right at us.
Prepare for evasive action.
We damaged her It looks like she's gonna blow right into Earth's orbit According to our calculations, she's going down smack in the middle of New York.
Every observatory in the world has spotted it.
Once it touches down, we should be able to locate it.
You haven't even told me what it is.
Our main concern is to get to the craft and its crew before anybody else.
We are encountering signals from the planet below There are apparently life forms on this planet.
Andromus, I see it, but I do not understand.
We have done what no Cylon before us has been able to do.
We have found the lost human civilization.
She's going in, about 60 miles north of New York City.
I see it, but what is it? I am created in man's image, so I may go wherever necessary to study their transmission centers.
So that we may use our distress beam to signal our people.
It's not one of ours.
Troy, it's Cylon.
You guys weren't in that crash.
That wasn't our ship.
Let's check you guys out, huh? Up against the car.
Feet spread.
Now.
That's it.
Spread your legs.
Hey, Leroy, what in the world is this? I don't know, some kind of cigarette lighter? Holy WOLFMAN ON RADIO: Just laying down the sound Stop the car! Stop the car! What? That costume, it's incredible.
Costume? Are you out of your mind? You just gave me a heart attack.
Hey, you want a lift? It's Halloween, right? Everybody has a blast tonight.
Come on.
Turn on your scanner to the Cylon distress frequency.
(BEEPING) They've got some kind of transmitting device.
They must think they can use it to reach the Cylon empire, but how? And this is my husband Norman.
He's general manager of the station we're listening to.
Station.
150,000 watts.
On a good night, they can hear us in the next galaxy.
Really? Mildred and Arnie are just gonna love this.
Yeah, well, I hope they feel the same way after Arnie forces a couple of his famous meatballs down their throat.
Now, Norman, don't get started on those meatballs again this year.
(SIRENS WAILING) Troy.
I see them.
We have the fugitive police car in sight.
We're in pursuit.
We stop, we'll lose time.
That's the one thing we can't afford to lose.
All those Cylons need to do is get control of a transmitter for just a few minutes.
NARRATOR: And now the exciting conclusion of "The Night the Cylons Landed" DILLON: This is the largest city, we've seen on Earth.
TROY: We should easily be able to lose our pursuers.
DILLON: Yeah, tell them.
They're right behind us.
(TIRES SCREECHING) That was close.
Troy, they're still right behind us.
Troy.
Yes? We're running out of city.
I think we just ran out of city.
(SCREAMING) Troy.
Over here.
OFFICER 1: Get on the horn to Harbor Patrol to start looking for bodies.
And, look, until we get them, cordon off the area.
Commander Adama here.
Go ahead, Captain Troy.
Lieutenant Dillon and I located the crashed ship.
Commander, it's a Cylon ship.
Yes, we know.
Our Earth brothers, are they aware of the Cylons' existence? Negative, the ship was set to self-destruct.
There were no traces left that can be analyzed.
Thank the Lord.
But there's something else.
Not all the crew members perished inside the crash.
By our judgment, they're not that far ahead of us.
We assume that they're headed for a powerful transmitting station in the city of New York.
Commander, if they transmit Earth's location Yes, I understand, Doctor.
Troy, Dillon, never has your mission been so grave.
We must not let the Cylons transmit Earth's location to their battle fleet.
We won't.
We can't.
(DOORBELL RINGS) Oh, Norman, Shirley, you look wonderful! (CHUCKLES) Arnie, the boss is here.
ARNIE: Good.
Tell them I'm baking a real surprise in here.
Yes, well we baked a real surprise out here.
Fellas.
Oh, what a get-up.
Arnie! Arnie, come here you've got to see this.
Oh, come on now, what could possibly be Holy Who is that? Who's in there? Wilt Chamberlain? Guess again.
No, I can't.
I gotta get back to the kitchen and meatball There goes the surprise, I gave it away.
I only wish Oh, come on.
I want you to have the first taste.
Listen, I think I ought to introduce our friends around.
We got to bring them if we could talk them into coming.
CHILD: Hi, what a space suit! Tommy, kids, this is Andy and Centuri.
Centuri.
Happy Halloween.
Happy Halloween.
Happy Halloween, little people.
Well, I hope you like the crowd.
It's mostly ad agency You know, media.
I'm interested in your transmissions.
Transmissions? Yes, your Wolfman Jack.
Well, if you're interested in broadcasting, you've come to the right party.
You'll find out anything you want to know, right here.
That would be very helpful.
(SIREN WAILING) (TIRES SCREECHING) What took you guys so long? My kid locked himself in the bathroom.
DISPATCHER ON RADIO: Unit 47 I can see him through the crack in the door.
To East Side YMCA He's sticking his tongue out at me.
OFFICER: Lady, we'll get him.
WOMAN: Hurry up! WOMAN: I can't believe it.
(DOOR CLOSING) (BEEPING) The signal's getting weaker, Troy.
The Centurions must be on the other side of the city.
DISPATCHER ON RADIO: Attention all units Code 1016 Be on the alert for two Caucasian males Approximately 6'2", both wearing leather jackets One light tan, one dark brown Suspects are armed and considered dangerous Repeat Suspects are armed and considered dangerous Hey, you two.
Do you want something? Unit 62 R No, just headed into the city.
Report to Benson's Market, 1864 Lexington Code 34 All units, additional description of two Caucasian on Code 1016 Last seen in stolen police vehicle in East River One or both believed spotted in wet clothing heading west from river Hey! Hey, you two! Come here! Unit 47, report to East Side YMCA DILLON: We can't remain in these clothes much longer.
Every police officer in this city is looking for us.
All the facilities for clothing appear to be closed.
DILLON: Even if they weren't.
It's kind of hard not to be noticed when you're soaking wet.
This way.
(MUSIC PLAYING) ? Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay ? Mister Bluebird's on my shoulder ? It's the truth, it's actual ? Everything is satisfactual ? Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay ? Wonderful feeling, wonderful day ? Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay Troy.
? My, oh, my, what a wonderful day ? Plenty of sunshine headin' my way Dancing mammals.
? Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay Strange.
? Mister Bluebird's on my shoulder ? It's the truth, it's actual ? Everything is satisfactual Dillon.
Looks like every size imaginable.
Yes.
Shall we? By all means.
Strange-looking.
But I guess they're acceptable down here on Earth.
Let's hurry.
? Mister Bluebird's on my shoulder ? It's the truth, it's actual ? Everything is satisfactual ? Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay ? Wonderful feeling, wonderful day? Hats.
Canes.
Come on, let's go.
Five, four, three Troy.
The Good Ship Lollipop.
(APPLAUSE) (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING) ? On the good ship Lollipop ? It's a sweet trip to a candy shop ? Where bonbons play ? On the sunny beach of Peppermint Bay We gotta get out of here.
Right.
Lift me.
Hey, lift her! ? On the good ship Lollipop ? It's a night trip into bed you hop DILLON: And for our disappearing act.
? And dream away on the good ship Lollipop ? Lollipop? (AUDIENCE EXCLAIMING) Did you feel something? We've lost a lot of time.
I know.
According to my scanner the Cylon signals remain constant.
It's approximately 4.
6 acron ions in strength.
That means they've either been stopped by something or they've reached the transmission station where they were headed.
Taxi! It worked.
Hey! Hi, everybody.
Happy Halloween! Wolfman Jack on the scene.
You wanna have a party tonight, say, "Oh, yeah!" ALL: Oh, yeah! All right! I will need you, Centuri.
These people have told me that their transmission center is just beyond those buildings.
It cannot be visited at night because of security precautions.
They have, however, what are known as keys for emergency admittance.
Centuri, we must find those keys or take one of these people with us.
You will investigate the man who dwells here.
By your command Oh, my! It is Wolfman.
See, I told you he'd be here.
Hi, Wolfman.
What's your name? Tommy.
Hi, little Tommy.
Hi.
Now, I want all you little ghosts and goblins and part-time Frankensteins to have a good time tonight.
Right? Oh, yeah! ALL: Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! All right.
Yes, indeed.
Hey, Wolf, I need you on the balcony.
Well, I tell you, you know Wow! What Who's the chrome head? Centuri.
Wow.
Well, listen, I got all my fans here.
I got someone who's been dying to meet you all night.
He's a real fan of yours.
Well, anybody with taste like that, I can't keep waiting.
Oh, come on.
Excuse me, guys.
Okay? Okay.
All right.
Hi, happy Halloween! Hi! The legendary Wolfman Jack.
This is my friend, Andy Call me Andy.
Well, lay it on me, Andy.
(CACKLES) I'll just leave you two alone.
Hey, I understand that walking monument out there belongs to you.
Monument? Yeah, that big dude out there.
You know, with the silver hairdo.
Yes, we enjoyed very much hearing your transmission.
Though it did seem somewhat primitive.
Well, that's my style, but you talk about primitive.
Primitive was when Marconi sent the letter S across the English Channel back in 1901.
Now, that was primitive.
I am very interested in what you call radio.
Oh, yes, radio.
Radio is the real music of the spheres.
Each and every star and planet out there are sending out their own signals.
Just like the old Wolfman, who is a heavenly body in his own right.
The only thing that can stop the Wolfman Jack is a big old solar wave.
Solar wave? Yeah, you see, every now and then, the sun gives off with an attack.
It's like eating spicy food.
And sends out waves and waves of gases for millions and millions of miles.
And I tell you, it stops radio plain dead.
This would stop your transmission? Yeah, can you dig it? Oh, quite possibly.
A vegetation center in the middle of all this concrete.
I estimate the signal they're emitting is coming from those perpendicular dwellings just beyond this space.
It's not the kind of place you'd expect to find a powerful transmitter.
There's got to be a link to the Cylon mission here someplace.
DILLON: Too bad we're on such a deadly mission.
Because New York looks like a nice place.
According to my scanner, the signals are getting stronger.
It's coming from that large dwelling dead ahead.
Hey, look at the fancy Dans.
Going to a party, boys? (TOUGHIES CHUCKLING) Yes, well, we are in a hurry.
Fine, we'll keep it short and sweet.
Your money or your life.
That hardly seems like an equitable trade.
We don't have any money that you could use.
What kind of money are you carrying, fancy Dan? Stolen.
Stolen? He's carrying stolen money.
It was a mistake, but strictly speaking, he's correct.
Hear that, fellas.
Fancy Dan has been heard from.
Okay.
You hand over your stolen money.
We'll worry about it from there, and you can both be on your way.
Come on, give me your money, baby, huh? We can't do that.
It would implicate you in a bank robbery and that would be unfair to you.
Man, I heard some jive in my time, but this is prime stuff.
Now, one more time, dudes.
Troy, why don't we take advantage of the vegetation? That's a good idea.
That way we can avoid violence.
That does it.
Take 'em! (TOUGHIES EXCLAIMING) Where'd they go? Hey! May I remind you we're in a hurry? Right.
Goodbye.
Must be that junk food I'm eating.
It's affecting my head.
I found no keys We must take a human I have examined these premises.
There is a food preparation center with an access door.
A human could accompany us without alarming any of the other guests.
I want you to go there and wait.
I will bring the one who best serves our purposes.
By your command Norman, just in time for a fresh batch of meatballs.
Forget the meatballs, I'm worried.
Forget my meatballs? Forget these morsels of heavenly splendor that I spent an hour and a half preparing? Arnie, I don't care if you spent a year and a half.
Now, I want to know what you told that guy out there about the security system at the station.
He asked if he could go to the station to see how a show is done.
I said sure.
When he said tonight, I laughed.
Yeah, well, I'm not laughing.
I noticed.
How did he find out about the keys to the elevator? I told him he couldn't get there at night.
There are only three sets of keys.
Why? What's going on? Look, Arnie, I think we better call the police.
What? I think we got a couple of nuts out there.
Nuts? What kind of friends did you invite to my party? Well, I only know them an hour.
An hour? You invited perfect strangers to my party.
And now they're probably getting out of line, is that it? No, no, no.
It's just that all this talk about the radio stations got me nervous.
I'll tell you what, Norman, take these out, pass them around.
I'll be out there in a minute and I'll see that they leave nice and quietly.
No, no, no.
That could be dangerous.
Remember, I worked my way through school as a bouncer.
Believe me, Norman, there's nobody I can't handle.
Hi! We were just talking about you.
Hi, pal.
Having a nice time, are you? You were speaking of danger (LAUGHS NERVOUSLY) Danger? No, I Did you say anything about danger? No, no.
Well, I (STAMMERING) I said that it was dangerous.
I mean, the meatballs.
When you take one, you have to take another.
They just grow on you.
Yeah.
Wait till you sink your chops into one of these.
(CENTURION BEEPING) What happened? He collapsed.
Probably ate some of your meatballs.
Poor man.
He did not eat my meatballs.
I was just in here cooking, he came in and Maybe he's got a pacemaker.
Think it could have been the microwave? No, no, no.
That's not true.
Unless he had an old pacemaker.
I read alternating current can do that.
Here, help me get this off.
What have you done? The machine.
Turn off that machine! (WHIRRING) Arnie, what did you put in the meatballs? Gunpowder? Somebody call the fire department.
I will before that fire spreads.
Get the kids out of here.
Use the stairwell! Wolfman, give me a hand with this guy.
Centuri, rise.
Stand back Stay back from me Wolfman, we'll go this way.
The signal's weaker, Troy.
They must be leaving the building.
WOMAN: Sammy! Sammy, no! Skippy's in there! You go after the Cylons.
We'll communicate later.
No, no, no, no.
I'll get him.
No, wait a minute.
No.
Sammy! SAMMY: Skippy, Skippy, where are you? Skippy, Skippy, where are you, Skippy? Come here, Skippy! Come on.
I want you to put this over your nose and mouth.
I want you to breathe through it.
Okay? Let's go! (DOG BARKS) Skippy! Stay here.
I'll get him.
Okay, let's get out of here now.
I want you to stay down close to the ground where the air's better.
Smoke rises.
Oh, oh, Sammy! FIREMAN: Use the stairwell just in case there's a power failure.
Now, there's no danger below this floor, so take your time.
You can take him to Bellevue.
They'll be receiving for an examination.
We're always happy to cooperate completely with the federal government, Colonel.
However, you're not giving us very much to go on.
The matter is under a close security blanket.
What's the matter? Don't you trust the New York City Police Department? No, I didn't say that.
Then just what did you mean? There are things under investigation that do not necessarily seem rational.
Nor do they present possibility of rational explanations.
The average cop on the street couldn't handle it.
Don't underestimate my men.
All right.
You want it straight.
(SIGHS) I'll give you what I can.
Alone, if you don't mind.
Grover's my right hand.
What I hear, he hears.
That's the way it is.
I understand.
All right.
I believe we are dealing with aliens from another world.
Grover.
Give us a few minutes, will you? My pleasure, Chief.
Nice meeting you, Colonel.
Pleasure meeting you.
WOLFMAN: I mean, I've been through a real experience, man.
I'm dead.
You know what I mean? Okay.
Okay, now, where can I (STAMMERING) Where can I take you guys? International Trade Center.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
I said it was going to be hard to swallow.
You said it was going to be hard, but this is ridiculous.
I've got a fellow officer in a Washington hospital suffering from a kind of shock that isn't at all ridiculous.
His brain is someplace else.
His brain is someplace else.
That's what they're gonna be saying about me if I pay any attention to your request.
I don't want those men harmed.
We don't shoot people on sight, Colonel Briggs, but the men must me alerted.
Especially when there's reason to believe they're in danger.
Which I think is the case now.
I'll admit to that.
Sorry to interrupt, Chief.
This could be what you're looking for.
A fire over in Central Park.
What has that got to do with We've got a dozen witnesses in Bellevue that swore a guy burned down a joint with flames coming out of his fingers.
Flames coming out of his fingers? Colonel, where are you going? Bellevue.
You don't believe that.
No, of course not.
Get another car and follow us.
Okay, that'll be five bucks.
That will be all.
Show us to the transmitter.
We are almost there, Centuri.
And soon we shall summon our brothers to the last outpost of human civilization.
What have you learned? Our scanner's right on target.
They're here.
Right up the street.
A taxi driver said they're in that building.
Of course.
There's a transmission tower.
Come on.
What is it you guys want? I mean, if you want to make a political announcement or something I mean, you know, something can be worked out.
AUTOMATED VOICE: All floors above this floor are closed to the public Access is by special key only You will find further information on the control panel The key.
The key? The key.
We'll be on the top floor in just a minute.
Radio station's on the 70th floor.
The extension tube's over here.
WOLFMAN: It's this way.
(THAT'LL BE THE DAY PLAYING) ? That'll be the day when I die ? Well, that'll be the day What is it? Why have we stopped? I don't know.
AUTOMATED VOICE: All floors above this floor are closed to the public Access is by special key only You will find further information on the control panel Just a number to dial.
A lot of good that's gonna do.
Oh, now we're getting someplace.
Troy, that's a long way up there to the top.
Do we have a choice? How is it? You're not gonna like it.
Come on up anyway.
There.
Now we should be able to jump.
Not all the way up there.
No, we should be able to leap one floor at a time till we reach the top.
That's a wonderful idea, Troy.
Why don't you try it? I'm going to.
Be careful, Troy.
Your turn.
I don't want to get too far ahead of you.
No, that's all right.
I'm not proud.
39 more to go.
? That'll be the day when you say goodbye ? That'll be the day you make me cry? Whoever is in charge must be warned to cooperate.
Their well-being is completely in your hands.
Yeah, well, you tell them.
Tell whom? The machines.
You see, when I go off the air, the rest of the night is fully automated, and the machines do it all until 6:00 in the morning.
The music we play is on this machine, and when the record finishes, that machine comes on.
WOLFMAN ON TAPE: Oh, yeah! That'll Be the Day.
And this is your Wolfman reminding you that these late, great sounds coming your way on the mighty WQSL 150,000 watts of magic And, now, a quick bit of information for all you night cats WEATHERMAN ON TAPE: The WQSL weather check for New York City tomorrow shows a high of 78 degrees Fahrenheit, 26 degrees Celsius And, now, back to the Wolfman WOLFMAN: Hey, hey, hey This is the number one Very impressive.
The sounds of My Life.
Someday, you Earth people will come to understand just how unimportant you are to running a truly efficient society.
(MY LIFE PLAYING) You Earth people? Where is your input terminal? We have a signal to transmit.
No, no, I didn't actually see fire coming from anyone's fingertips.
(COUGHING) Well, I did.
She's very excitable.
(IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) Excitable? Norman, I actually saw someone blow up a kitchen.
(STAMMERING) And you say I'm excitable.
You actually saw a flame coming from this creature Appear as though it was coming from this man's fingertips? Yes.
Yes.
How many times do I have to tell you? Yes! You know, I saw this movie once, and the guy had a flame thrower attached to his arm.
But he covered it up with a robe.
He had to create this burning bush to impress the natives.
Did this man we're talking about appear to have a flame thrower attached to his back? (COUGHING) No.
No.
Now then, which of the two men I'm about to show you spewed flames out of his fingers? Well, neither one of these.
Neither one of these? He didn't look anything like these guys.
Mr.
Blore, maybe your head is a little clearer.
Well, now, wait a minute.
He was there.
Ah-ha, now we're getting someplace.
Now I can add arson to the list.
You sure this is the man who started the fire? No, no, no, no.
He was the one that rescued us.
He rescued you? Oh, yes! Yes, he ran right back through all those flames and he saved little Sammy.
I probably owe that man my son's life.
You sure about that? Oh, yeah.
Well, he is definitely not the one that started the fire, and the other one wasn't even there.
Not that we could see.
Not that you could see? That means there was another one there that you could not see.
Well, he was in this 8-foot suit.
Yeah.
He was immense.
And he had this big red eye that kept drifting.
(IMITATING WHOOSHING SOUND) There'd been a lot of libation going on before these two got there.
Halloween cheer.
If you're asking me, had I been drinking, no, I don't drink when I cook.
Excuse me.
(ALL CLAMORING) Quiet! What's going on here, Sergeant? This is a hospital, not a booking office.
I'm sorry, Captain.
We found these two boys running down 5th Avenue, and when we stopped to question them, they start babbling like a couple of maniacs.
So I thought I'd want to check on them.
You know, to see if they were drinking or something like that.
Officer, we ain't been drinking.
Man, this was like something you've never seen.
Go on, take them down to the station, check them out.
What about that metal creep? It was a Cyclops! Yeah, he's telling like it is.
Some big chrome-dome is trying to take over our territory in the Park.
We will need the emergency homing device.
Hey, that's expensive stuff.
Listen, anything you want to do, you can do right here with this microphone.
What emergency transmission procedures do you have? You know, that's government stuff.
That's the Emergency Broadcasting System.
That's where the government cuts in on about 8,000 radio stations and tells them what's coming down and what they're supposed to do about it.
We will tap into that system.
Hey, you dudes can't do that.
I mean, you start messing with that sealed gear upstairs, and the government's really gonna come down on you.
You will show us where that equipment is.
I can't.
Centuri.
You got it.
Yes, indeed.
We're almost there, but don't look down.
WOLFMAN: Hey, you dudes are messing with some heavy, heavy stuff.
I mean, this is big-time government.
The US of A.
I mean, this is the big democracy.
Is this the emergency system? Ah, give it up, guys.
There ain't no way you gonna get in there to activate that system.
Centuri.
Oh.
(WHIRRING) Lead us to the main dish.
Ah, look, guys, I got this thing about heights, so Centuri, keep your place.
Tin man.
Of all the parties I had to go to, I had to go to this one, and then I had to meet these guys.
They ain't never gonna believe this Transmission's getting stronger.
This way.
And now we must link it up to signal.
Beam out to our brothers.
Beam out to your brothers? The signal from Earth has been turned to beam straight up to the star Balcon.
I suggest you begin jamming all outbound signals from Earth by sending out enormous high-powered interference on these transmission bands.
The Cylon base ship will surely come to investigate such interference.
Perhaps with a small patrol.
But is that distress signal is beamed up to space, she will respond with every ship in the Cylon fleet.
I'll have our warships stand by to launch an intercept against the Cylons.
I will also pray that it is unnecessary.
I mean, come on now, guys, I've been a real good sport about this whole thing.
Now, I've done exactly as you asked me to do, against my better judgment.
Yes, you have served your purpose.
Centuri.
Hold on.
Hey, hey, now.
Wait a minute, now, big fella.
No reason to get uptight.
I mean, I believe in "live and let live.
" I mean, if you and your friend want to look at the stars, you know, and you want to communicate with your brothers or whatever it is, who's to say what's normal? You know what I mean? I mean Centurion! Stop them, Centuri.
Get out of the way! You don't have to say it twice.
(GROANS) Centuri, keep them from deflecting the antenna.
I will protect you ANDROMUS: No, Centuri, save the antenna, so that we may communicate with our fleet You all right? I will be as soon as I get out of here.
I will protect you No, Centuri.
I'm going.
Bye! Centuri, Centuri, what are you doing? I will protect you No, Centuri, not this way.
No! Talk about close.
ADAMA: The signals from Earth have stopped, and we've stopped our jamming.
WOMAN ON INTERCOM: Incoming transmission for Commander Adama Transfer to Dr.
Zee's chamber, please.
TRO Y: Commander Troy, you're all right.
Is Dillon? Yes, sir, fine and well.
But the Cylons, the signals.
We were afraid Temporary setback.
The Cylons took the fall.
Fall's a good word for it.
It was a beaut.
It was a A beaut? That's Earth talk.
The Cylons destroyed themselves.
Well, then they're hardly now so advanced that we cannot win.
No, sir The next time do us a courtesy, if the Cylons are on their way to Earth, please give us a little more notice.
Or don't let them come at all.
They ruined a fine holiday, known here on Earth as Halloween.
My apologies to all concerned.
CHIEF: Span out.
Cover the building.
Come on, move it! (CHIEF YELLING ORDERS) OFFICER: All right, guys, this way.
Up to the roof.
Everybody! (BEEPING) Absolutely no one here.
You sure about that? Yeah, believe me, we searched every inch of this place There's no one here Either they vanished or they rode off on broomsticks I'm telling you, these two These two guys come up with tails on, and they zap these other two space nuts, you know? I know it sounds crazy, but it's the truth.
I'm not kidding around.
This is the way it happened.
Colonel, I don't know what you think is really out there, but you got to remember you're in New York City.
Outsiders are always taking shots at us because they don't know very much about what's going on here.
Chief, you can't tell me that anyone, not you, not one of your men, can explain what has gone on here tonight.
And that's because it was not of this world.
But I've spent enough time in the New York City Police Department not to be willing to be convinced about almost anything.
And what about the two who were supposed to be on the roof, and are not? Where are they? (DISPATCHER CHATTERING ON RADIO) I will protect you Call the men down off the roof.
We're gonna pack it up.
Hey, Chief, we've been through some zany cases together before, but you don't really believe there's anything to this, you know (IMITATES WHOOSHING SOUND) What do you think it really was? It's Halloween, Grover.
Trick or treat.
Come on down.
Right.
Time to head for home.
Home? But we just got here.
And everyone's always saying how lively and exciting New York is.
That it has been.
No, I meant it.
Except for those excitable youths of Central Park, I think it was.
It was very nice.
And I'd like to see those other segments of that entertainment we interrupted.
Dillon, maybe next time.
Yeah, I guess you're right.
So, this is New York.
Our home for these many years we've endured the wilderness of space And now we near the end of our journey We have at last found Earth NARRATOR: In a moment, Part II of "The Night the Cylons Landed," but first a few scenes from Part I Captain, I'm still echoing that slow-moving target.
Everything suggests a Cylon machine.
Visual sighting, sir.
She's coming right at us.
Prepare for evasive action.
We damaged her It looks like she's gonna blow right into Earth's orbit According to our calculations, she's going down smack in the middle of New York.
Every observatory in the world has spotted it.
Once it touches down, we should be able to locate it.
You haven't even told me what it is.
Our main concern is to get to the craft and its crew before anybody else.
We are encountering signals from the planet below There are apparently life forms on this planet.
Andromus, I see it, but I do not understand.
We have done what no Cylon before us has been able to do.
We have found the lost human civilization.
She's going in, about 60 miles north of New York City.
I see it, but what is it? I am created in man's image, so I may go wherever necessary to study their transmission centers.
So that we may use our distress beam to signal our people.
It's not one of ours.
Troy, it's Cylon.
You guys weren't in that crash.
That wasn't our ship.
Let's check you guys out, huh? Up against the car.
Feet spread.
Now.
That's it.
Spread your legs.
Hey, Leroy, what in the world is this? I don't know, some kind of cigarette lighter? Holy WOLFMAN ON RADIO: Just laying down the sound Stop the car! Stop the car! What? That costume, it's incredible.
Costume? Are you out of your mind? You just gave me a heart attack.
Hey, you want a lift? It's Halloween, right? Everybody has a blast tonight.
Come on.
Turn on your scanner to the Cylon distress frequency.
(BEEPING) They've got some kind of transmitting device.
They must think they can use it to reach the Cylon empire, but how? And this is my husband Norman.
He's general manager of the station we're listening to.
Station.
150,000 watts.
On a good night, they can hear us in the next galaxy.
Really? Mildred and Arnie are just gonna love this.
Yeah, well, I hope they feel the same way after Arnie forces a couple of his famous meatballs down their throat.
Now, Norman, don't get started on those meatballs again this year.
(SIRENS WAILING) Troy.
I see them.
We have the fugitive police car in sight.
We're in pursuit.
We stop, we'll lose time.
That's the one thing we can't afford to lose.
All those Cylons need to do is get control of a transmitter for just a few minutes.
NARRATOR: And now the exciting conclusion of "The Night the Cylons Landed" DILLON: This is the largest city, we've seen on Earth.
TROY: We should easily be able to lose our pursuers.
DILLON: Yeah, tell them.
They're right behind us.
(TIRES SCREECHING) That was close.
Troy, they're still right behind us.
Troy.
Yes? We're running out of city.
I think we just ran out of city.
(SCREAMING) Troy.
Over here.
OFFICER 1: Get on the horn to Harbor Patrol to start looking for bodies.
And, look, until we get them, cordon off the area.
Commander Adama here.
Go ahead, Captain Troy.
Lieutenant Dillon and I located the crashed ship.
Commander, it's a Cylon ship.
Yes, we know.
Our Earth brothers, are they aware of the Cylons' existence? Negative, the ship was set to self-destruct.
There were no traces left that can be analyzed.
Thank the Lord.
But there's something else.
Not all the crew members perished inside the crash.
By our judgment, they're not that far ahead of us.
We assume that they're headed for a powerful transmitting station in the city of New York.
Commander, if they transmit Earth's location Yes, I understand, Doctor.
Troy, Dillon, never has your mission been so grave.
We must not let the Cylons transmit Earth's location to their battle fleet.
We won't.
We can't.
(DOORBELL RINGS) Oh, Norman, Shirley, you look wonderful! (CHUCKLES) Arnie, the boss is here.
ARNIE: Good.
Tell them I'm baking a real surprise in here.
Yes, well we baked a real surprise out here.
Fellas.
Oh, what a get-up.
Arnie! Arnie, come here you've got to see this.
Oh, come on now, what could possibly be Holy Who is that? Who's in there? Wilt Chamberlain? Guess again.
No, I can't.
I gotta get back to the kitchen and meatball There goes the surprise, I gave it away.
I only wish Oh, come on.
I want you to have the first taste.
Listen, I think I ought to introduce our friends around.
We got to bring them if we could talk them into coming.
CHILD: Hi, what a space suit! Tommy, kids, this is Andy and Centuri.
Centuri.
Happy Halloween.
Happy Halloween.
Happy Halloween, little people.
Well, I hope you like the crowd.
It's mostly ad agency You know, media.
I'm interested in your transmissions.
Transmissions? Yes, your Wolfman Jack.
Well, if you're interested in broadcasting, you've come to the right party.
You'll find out anything you want to know, right here.
That would be very helpful.
(SIREN WAILING) (TIRES SCREECHING) What took you guys so long? My kid locked himself in the bathroom.
DISPATCHER ON RADIO: Unit 47 I can see him through the crack in the door.
To East Side YMCA He's sticking his tongue out at me.
OFFICER: Lady, we'll get him.
WOMAN: Hurry up! WOMAN: I can't believe it.
(DOOR CLOSING) (BEEPING) The signal's getting weaker, Troy.
The Centurions must be on the other side of the city.
DISPATCHER ON RADIO: Attention all units Code 1016 Be on the alert for two Caucasian males Approximately 6'2", both wearing leather jackets One light tan, one dark brown Suspects are armed and considered dangerous Repeat Suspects are armed and considered dangerous Hey, you two.
Do you want something? Unit 62 R No, just headed into the city.
Report to Benson's Market, 1864 Lexington Code 34 All units, additional description of two Caucasian on Code 1016 Last seen in stolen police vehicle in East River One or both believed spotted in wet clothing heading west from river Hey! Hey, you two! Come here! Unit 47, report to East Side YMCA DILLON: We can't remain in these clothes much longer.
Every police officer in this city is looking for us.
All the facilities for clothing appear to be closed.
DILLON: Even if they weren't.
It's kind of hard not to be noticed when you're soaking wet.
This way.
(MUSIC PLAYING) ? Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay ? Mister Bluebird's on my shoulder ? It's the truth, it's actual ? Everything is satisfactual ? Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay ? Wonderful feeling, wonderful day ? Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay Troy.
? My, oh, my, what a wonderful day ? Plenty of sunshine headin' my way Dancing mammals.
? Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay Strange.
? Mister Bluebird's on my shoulder ? It's the truth, it's actual ? Everything is satisfactual Dillon.
Looks like every size imaginable.
Yes.
Shall we? By all means.
Strange-looking.
But I guess they're acceptable down here on Earth.
Let's hurry.
? Mister Bluebird's on my shoulder ? It's the truth, it's actual ? Everything is satisfactual ? Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay ? Wonderful feeling, wonderful day? Hats.
Canes.
Come on, let's go.
Five, four, three Troy.
The Good Ship Lollipop.
(APPLAUSE) (INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING) ? On the good ship Lollipop ? It's a sweet trip to a candy shop ? Where bonbons play ? On the sunny beach of Peppermint Bay We gotta get out of here.
Right.
Lift me.
Hey, lift her! ? On the good ship Lollipop ? It's a night trip into bed you hop DILLON: And for our disappearing act.
? And dream away on the good ship Lollipop ? Lollipop? (AUDIENCE EXCLAIMING) Did you feel something? We've lost a lot of time.
I know.
According to my scanner the Cylon signals remain constant.
It's approximately 4.
6 acron ions in strength.
That means they've either been stopped by something or they've reached the transmission station where they were headed.
Taxi! It worked.
Hey! Hi, everybody.
Happy Halloween! Wolfman Jack on the scene.
You wanna have a party tonight, say, "Oh, yeah!" ALL: Oh, yeah! All right! I will need you, Centuri.
These people have told me that their transmission center is just beyond those buildings.
It cannot be visited at night because of security precautions.
They have, however, what are known as keys for emergency admittance.
Centuri, we must find those keys or take one of these people with us.
You will investigate the man who dwells here.
By your command Oh, my! It is Wolfman.
See, I told you he'd be here.
Hi, Wolfman.
What's your name? Tommy.
Hi, little Tommy.
Hi.
Now, I want all you little ghosts and goblins and part-time Frankensteins to have a good time tonight.
Right? Oh, yeah! ALL: Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah! All right.
Yes, indeed.
Hey, Wolf, I need you on the balcony.
Well, I tell you, you know Wow! What Who's the chrome head? Centuri.
Wow.
Well, listen, I got all my fans here.
I got someone who's been dying to meet you all night.
He's a real fan of yours.
Well, anybody with taste like that, I can't keep waiting.
Oh, come on.
Excuse me, guys.
Okay? Okay.
All right.
Hi, happy Halloween! Hi! The legendary Wolfman Jack.
This is my friend, Andy Call me Andy.
Well, lay it on me, Andy.
(CACKLES) I'll just leave you two alone.
Hey, I understand that walking monument out there belongs to you.
Monument? Yeah, that big dude out there.
You know, with the silver hairdo.
Yes, we enjoyed very much hearing your transmission.
Though it did seem somewhat primitive.
Well, that's my style, but you talk about primitive.
Primitive was when Marconi sent the letter S across the English Channel back in 1901.
Now, that was primitive.
I am very interested in what you call radio.
Oh, yes, radio.
Radio is the real music of the spheres.
Each and every star and planet out there are sending out their own signals.
Just like the old Wolfman, who is a heavenly body in his own right.
The only thing that can stop the Wolfman Jack is a big old solar wave.
Solar wave? Yeah, you see, every now and then, the sun gives off with an attack.
It's like eating spicy food.
And sends out waves and waves of gases for millions and millions of miles.
And I tell you, it stops radio plain dead.
This would stop your transmission? Yeah, can you dig it? Oh, quite possibly.
A vegetation center in the middle of all this concrete.
I estimate the signal they're emitting is coming from those perpendicular dwellings just beyond this space.
It's not the kind of place you'd expect to find a powerful transmitter.
There's got to be a link to the Cylon mission here someplace.
DILLON: Too bad we're on such a deadly mission.
Because New York looks like a nice place.
According to my scanner, the signals are getting stronger.
It's coming from that large dwelling dead ahead.
Hey, look at the fancy Dans.
Going to a party, boys? (TOUGHIES CHUCKLING) Yes, well, we are in a hurry.
Fine, we'll keep it short and sweet.
Your money or your life.
That hardly seems like an equitable trade.
We don't have any money that you could use.
What kind of money are you carrying, fancy Dan? Stolen.
Stolen? He's carrying stolen money.
It was a mistake, but strictly speaking, he's correct.
Hear that, fellas.
Fancy Dan has been heard from.
Okay.
You hand over your stolen money.
We'll worry about it from there, and you can both be on your way.
Come on, give me your money, baby, huh? We can't do that.
It would implicate you in a bank robbery and that would be unfair to you.
Man, I heard some jive in my time, but this is prime stuff.
Now, one more time, dudes.
Troy, why don't we take advantage of the vegetation? That's a good idea.
That way we can avoid violence.
That does it.
Take 'em! (TOUGHIES EXCLAIMING) Where'd they go? Hey! May I remind you we're in a hurry? Right.
Goodbye.
Must be that junk food I'm eating.
It's affecting my head.
I found no keys We must take a human I have examined these premises.
There is a food preparation center with an access door.
A human could accompany us without alarming any of the other guests.
I want you to go there and wait.
I will bring the one who best serves our purposes.
By your command Norman, just in time for a fresh batch of meatballs.
Forget the meatballs, I'm worried.
Forget my meatballs? Forget these morsels of heavenly splendor that I spent an hour and a half preparing? Arnie, I don't care if you spent a year and a half.
Now, I want to know what you told that guy out there about the security system at the station.
He asked if he could go to the station to see how a show is done.
I said sure.
When he said tonight, I laughed.
Yeah, well, I'm not laughing.
I noticed.
How did he find out about the keys to the elevator? I told him he couldn't get there at night.
There are only three sets of keys.
Why? What's going on? Look, Arnie, I think we better call the police.
What? I think we got a couple of nuts out there.
Nuts? What kind of friends did you invite to my party? Well, I only know them an hour.
An hour? You invited perfect strangers to my party.
And now they're probably getting out of line, is that it? No, no, no.
It's just that all this talk about the radio stations got me nervous.
I'll tell you what, Norman, take these out, pass them around.
I'll be out there in a minute and I'll see that they leave nice and quietly.
No, no, no.
That could be dangerous.
Remember, I worked my way through school as a bouncer.
Believe me, Norman, there's nobody I can't handle.
Hi! We were just talking about you.
Hi, pal.
Having a nice time, are you? You were speaking of danger (LAUGHS NERVOUSLY) Danger? No, I Did you say anything about danger? No, no.
Well, I (STAMMERING) I said that it was dangerous.
I mean, the meatballs.
When you take one, you have to take another.
They just grow on you.
Yeah.
Wait till you sink your chops into one of these.
(CENTURION BEEPING) What happened? He collapsed.
Probably ate some of your meatballs.
Poor man.
He did not eat my meatballs.
I was just in here cooking, he came in and Maybe he's got a pacemaker.
Think it could have been the microwave? No, no, no.
That's not true.
Unless he had an old pacemaker.
I read alternating current can do that.
Here, help me get this off.
What have you done? The machine.
Turn off that machine! (WHIRRING) Arnie, what did you put in the meatballs? Gunpowder? Somebody call the fire department.
I will before that fire spreads.
Get the kids out of here.
Use the stairwell! Wolfman, give me a hand with this guy.
Centuri, rise.
Stand back Stay back from me Wolfman, we'll go this way.
The signal's weaker, Troy.
They must be leaving the building.
WOMAN: Sammy! Sammy, no! Skippy's in there! You go after the Cylons.
We'll communicate later.
No, no, no, no.
I'll get him.
No, wait a minute.
No.
Sammy! SAMMY: Skippy, Skippy, where are you? Skippy, Skippy, where are you, Skippy? Come here, Skippy! Come on.
I want you to put this over your nose and mouth.
I want you to breathe through it.
Okay? Let's go! (DOG BARKS) Skippy! Stay here.
I'll get him.
Okay, let's get out of here now.
I want you to stay down close to the ground where the air's better.
Smoke rises.
Oh, oh, Sammy! FIREMAN: Use the stairwell just in case there's a power failure.
Now, there's no danger below this floor, so take your time.
You can take him to Bellevue.
They'll be receiving for an examination.
We're always happy to cooperate completely with the federal government, Colonel.
However, you're not giving us very much to go on.
The matter is under a close security blanket.
What's the matter? Don't you trust the New York City Police Department? No, I didn't say that.
Then just what did you mean? There are things under investigation that do not necessarily seem rational.
Nor do they present possibility of rational explanations.
The average cop on the street couldn't handle it.
Don't underestimate my men.
All right.
You want it straight.
(SIGHS) I'll give you what I can.
Alone, if you don't mind.
Grover's my right hand.
What I hear, he hears.
That's the way it is.
I understand.
All right.
I believe we are dealing with aliens from another world.
Grover.
Give us a few minutes, will you? My pleasure, Chief.
Nice meeting you, Colonel.
Pleasure meeting you.
WOLFMAN: I mean, I've been through a real experience, man.
I'm dead.
You know what I mean? Okay.
Okay, now, where can I (STAMMERING) Where can I take you guys? International Trade Center.
Yeah.
Yeah, okay.
I said it was going to be hard to swallow.
You said it was going to be hard, but this is ridiculous.
I've got a fellow officer in a Washington hospital suffering from a kind of shock that isn't at all ridiculous.
His brain is someplace else.
His brain is someplace else.
That's what they're gonna be saying about me if I pay any attention to your request.
I don't want those men harmed.
We don't shoot people on sight, Colonel Briggs, but the men must me alerted.
Especially when there's reason to believe they're in danger.
Which I think is the case now.
I'll admit to that.
Sorry to interrupt, Chief.
This could be what you're looking for.
A fire over in Central Park.
What has that got to do with We've got a dozen witnesses in Bellevue that swore a guy burned down a joint with flames coming out of his fingers.
Flames coming out of his fingers? Colonel, where are you going? Bellevue.
You don't believe that.
No, of course not.
Get another car and follow us.
Okay, that'll be five bucks.
That will be all.
Show us to the transmitter.
We are almost there, Centuri.
And soon we shall summon our brothers to the last outpost of human civilization.
What have you learned? Our scanner's right on target.
They're here.
Right up the street.
A taxi driver said they're in that building.
Of course.
There's a transmission tower.
Come on.
What is it you guys want? I mean, if you want to make a political announcement or something I mean, you know, something can be worked out.
AUTOMATED VOICE: All floors above this floor are closed to the public Access is by special key only You will find further information on the control panel The key.
The key? The key.
We'll be on the top floor in just a minute.
Radio station's on the 70th floor.
The extension tube's over here.
WOLFMAN: It's this way.
(THAT'LL BE THE DAY PLAYING) ? That'll be the day when I die ? Well, that'll be the day What is it? Why have we stopped? I don't know.
AUTOMATED VOICE: All floors above this floor are closed to the public Access is by special key only You will find further information on the control panel Just a number to dial.
A lot of good that's gonna do.
Oh, now we're getting someplace.
Troy, that's a long way up there to the top.
Do we have a choice? How is it? You're not gonna like it.
Come on up anyway.
There.
Now we should be able to jump.
Not all the way up there.
No, we should be able to leap one floor at a time till we reach the top.
That's a wonderful idea, Troy.
Why don't you try it? I'm going to.
Be careful, Troy.
Your turn.
I don't want to get too far ahead of you.
No, that's all right.
I'm not proud.
39 more to go.
? That'll be the day when you say goodbye ? That'll be the day you make me cry? Whoever is in charge must be warned to cooperate.
Their well-being is completely in your hands.
Yeah, well, you tell them.
Tell whom? The machines.
You see, when I go off the air, the rest of the night is fully automated, and the machines do it all until 6:00 in the morning.
The music we play is on this machine, and when the record finishes, that machine comes on.
WOLFMAN ON TAPE: Oh, yeah! That'll Be the Day.
And this is your Wolfman reminding you that these late, great sounds coming your way on the mighty WQSL 150,000 watts of magic And, now, a quick bit of information for all you night cats WEATHERMAN ON TAPE: The WQSL weather check for New York City tomorrow shows a high of 78 degrees Fahrenheit, 26 degrees Celsius And, now, back to the Wolfman WOLFMAN: Hey, hey, hey This is the number one Very impressive.
The sounds of My Life.
Someday, you Earth people will come to understand just how unimportant you are to running a truly efficient society.
(MY LIFE PLAYING) You Earth people? Where is your input terminal? We have a signal to transmit.
No, no, I didn't actually see fire coming from anyone's fingertips.
(COUGHING) Well, I did.
She's very excitable.
(IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE) Excitable? Norman, I actually saw someone blow up a kitchen.
(STAMMERING) And you say I'm excitable.
You actually saw a flame coming from this creature Appear as though it was coming from this man's fingertips? Yes.
Yes.
How many times do I have to tell you? Yes! You know, I saw this movie once, and the guy had a flame thrower attached to his arm.
But he covered it up with a robe.
He had to create this burning bush to impress the natives.
Did this man we're talking about appear to have a flame thrower attached to his back? (COUGHING) No.
No.
Now then, which of the two men I'm about to show you spewed flames out of his fingers? Well, neither one of these.
Neither one of these? He didn't look anything like these guys.
Mr.
Blore, maybe your head is a little clearer.
Well, now, wait a minute.
He was there.
Ah-ha, now we're getting someplace.
Now I can add arson to the list.
You sure this is the man who started the fire? No, no, no, no.
He was the one that rescued us.
He rescued you? Oh, yes! Yes, he ran right back through all those flames and he saved little Sammy.
I probably owe that man my son's life.
You sure about that? Oh, yeah.
Well, he is definitely not the one that started the fire, and the other one wasn't even there.
Not that we could see.
Not that you could see? That means there was another one there that you could not see.
Well, he was in this 8-foot suit.
Yeah.
He was immense.
And he had this big red eye that kept drifting.
(IMITATING WHOOSHING SOUND) There'd been a lot of libation going on before these two got there.
Halloween cheer.
If you're asking me, had I been drinking, no, I don't drink when I cook.
Excuse me.
(ALL CLAMORING) Quiet! What's going on here, Sergeant? This is a hospital, not a booking office.
I'm sorry, Captain.
We found these two boys running down 5th Avenue, and when we stopped to question them, they start babbling like a couple of maniacs.
So I thought I'd want to check on them.
You know, to see if they were drinking or something like that.
Officer, we ain't been drinking.
Man, this was like something you've never seen.
Go on, take them down to the station, check them out.
What about that metal creep? It was a Cyclops! Yeah, he's telling like it is.
Some big chrome-dome is trying to take over our territory in the Park.
We will need the emergency homing device.
Hey, that's expensive stuff.
Listen, anything you want to do, you can do right here with this microphone.
What emergency transmission procedures do you have? You know, that's government stuff.
That's the Emergency Broadcasting System.
That's where the government cuts in on about 8,000 radio stations and tells them what's coming down and what they're supposed to do about it.
We will tap into that system.
Hey, you dudes can't do that.
I mean, you start messing with that sealed gear upstairs, and the government's really gonna come down on you.
You will show us where that equipment is.
I can't.
Centuri.
You got it.
Yes, indeed.
We're almost there, but don't look down.
WOLFMAN: Hey, you dudes are messing with some heavy, heavy stuff.
I mean, this is big-time government.
The US of A.
I mean, this is the big democracy.
Is this the emergency system? Ah, give it up, guys.
There ain't no way you gonna get in there to activate that system.
Centuri.
Oh.
(WHIRRING) Lead us to the main dish.
Ah, look, guys, I got this thing about heights, so Centuri, keep your place.
Tin man.
Of all the parties I had to go to, I had to go to this one, and then I had to meet these guys.
They ain't never gonna believe this Transmission's getting stronger.
This way.
And now we must link it up to signal.
Beam out to our brothers.
Beam out to your brothers? The signal from Earth has been turned to beam straight up to the star Balcon.
I suggest you begin jamming all outbound signals from Earth by sending out enormous high-powered interference on these transmission bands.
The Cylon base ship will surely come to investigate such interference.
Perhaps with a small patrol.
But is that distress signal is beamed up to space, she will respond with every ship in the Cylon fleet.
I'll have our warships stand by to launch an intercept against the Cylons.
I will also pray that it is unnecessary.
I mean, come on now, guys, I've been a real good sport about this whole thing.
Now, I've done exactly as you asked me to do, against my better judgment.
Yes, you have served your purpose.
Centuri.
Hold on.
Hey, hey, now.
Wait a minute, now, big fella.
No reason to get uptight.
I mean, I believe in "live and let live.
" I mean, if you and your friend want to look at the stars, you know, and you want to communicate with your brothers or whatever it is, who's to say what's normal? You know what I mean? I mean Centurion! Stop them, Centuri.
Get out of the way! You don't have to say it twice.
(GROANS) Centuri, keep them from deflecting the antenna.
I will protect you ANDROMUS: No, Centuri, save the antenna, so that we may communicate with our fleet You all right? I will be as soon as I get out of here.
I will protect you No, Centuri.
I'm going.
Bye! Centuri, Centuri, what are you doing? I will protect you No, Centuri, not this way.
No! Talk about close.
ADAMA: The signals from Earth have stopped, and we've stopped our jamming.
WOMAN ON INTERCOM: Incoming transmission for Commander Adama Transfer to Dr.
Zee's chamber, please.
TRO Y: Commander Troy, you're all right.
Is Dillon? Yes, sir, fine and well.
But the Cylons, the signals.
We were afraid Temporary setback.
The Cylons took the fall.
Fall's a good word for it.
It was a beaut.
It was a A beaut? That's Earth talk.
The Cylons destroyed themselves.
Well, then they're hardly now so advanced that we cannot win.
No, sir The next time do us a courtesy, if the Cylons are on their way to Earth, please give us a little more notice.
Or don't let them come at all.
They ruined a fine holiday, known here on Earth as Halloween.
My apologies to all concerned.
CHIEF: Span out.
Cover the building.
Come on, move it! (CHIEF YELLING ORDERS) OFFICER: All right, guys, this way.
Up to the roof.
Everybody! (BEEPING) Absolutely no one here.
You sure about that? Yeah, believe me, we searched every inch of this place There's no one here Either they vanished or they rode off on broomsticks I'm telling you, these two These two guys come up with tails on, and they zap these other two space nuts, you know? I know it sounds crazy, but it's the truth.
I'm not kidding around.
This is the way it happened.
Colonel, I don't know what you think is really out there, but you got to remember you're in New York City.
Outsiders are always taking shots at us because they don't know very much about what's going on here.
Chief, you can't tell me that anyone, not you, not one of your men, can explain what has gone on here tonight.
And that's because it was not of this world.
But I've spent enough time in the New York City Police Department not to be willing to be convinced about almost anything.
And what about the two who were supposed to be on the roof, and are not? Where are they? (DISPATCHER CHATTERING ON RADIO) I will protect you Call the men down off the roof.
We're gonna pack it up.
Hey, Chief, we've been through some zany cases together before, but you don't really believe there's anything to this, you know (IMITATES WHOOSHING SOUND) What do you think it really was? It's Halloween, Grover.
Trick or treat.
Come on down.
Right.
Time to head for home.
Home? But we just got here.
And everyone's always saying how lively and exciting New York is.
That it has been.
No, I meant it.
Except for those excitable youths of Central Park, I think it was.
It was very nice.
And I'd like to see those other segments of that entertainment we interrupted.
Dillon, maybe next time.
Yeah, I guess you're right.
So, this is New York.