Blindspotting (2021) s01e08 Episode Script

Bride or Die

1
I know, little man, I'm sorry.
But you went bowling, huh? With Grandma?
That's fun.
What else did you do?
So I bought this engagement ring
to finally propose to Ash
right before I got locked up.
It's sitting in a box at my mom's house,
and I made Ash promise
not to go diggin' around.
Fingers crossed my mom don't find it.
- She'll overreact.
- Oh, my God!
We could marry you guys in jail.
Oh, God, Rainey, please, please,
- can we just act like you didn't see that?
- All right.
Or Janelle.
Y'all finna do the damn thing?
Me and Ash still don't know
what made her come
back after hella years.
Anyway, sounds like she's
getting along flirtatiously
with that Earl dude next door.
I am the Spice King.
Seems like he's been
adopted by our crazy-ass family.
- Good luck, bruh.
- Don't start no shit.
He's fresh outta
San Quentin State Prison,
which is where I'm
transferring to next week.
I don't know what it's
gonna be like after this.
Go! Go! Go, go, go! Find a shirt!
Ashley, I'm finna
borrow your heels again.
'Cause I don't wanna stunt
on you too hard today.
I just know you're
gonna wear pants today.
Mm, I have a skirt.
- Amazing.
- Mm.
You still looking for your ID?
I know where it is.
Hurry up with the skirt.
We have to be there in an hour.
Rick Ayers is meeting us there.
Aha! Here it is. See?
I know what I'm doing.
Mama Rainey, you got your ID, right?
Oh, my God. It was one time.
You were 15 years old,
and we got out of Mexico just fine.
I mean, illegally, but it was fine.
Okay, who in the hell dressed Sean
like one of the cast
members from Jersey Shore?
Sean.
Trish, I can't believe
you signed off on this.
I'm happy for them. I
love an assertive woman.
Mm-hmm. You wanna do champagne?
No, you got the bottle.
- I got the glasses.
- A'ight.
Mommy, what are you doing?
We had glasses. It oh, fantastic.
Oh, y'all, Earl told
me to tell y'all, "What's up?"
And he gonna make us a
nice dinner when we get back.
Ooh! Can Sean have some bubbly?
Yeah, a little bit.
What? What the hell, y'all? No!
A tiny little bit. It'll be fine.
Oh, my God.
Um, you changing your clothes, right?
- I have a skirt.
- She has a skirt.
- You got your ID, Rainey?
- Oh, my God, for the love of
Mom.
Ash.
Okay, bitch.
You are so beautiful.
Okay.
Let's do a surprise wedding
for a man who doesn't
know that he proposed.
- Yeah!
- Whoo!
Okay, let's go. Let's go.
- Get it started, bitch!
- Pour me one?
I'm so thankful ♪
That I hung on in there ♪
It must have been
The will of God ♪
I do declare ♪
Talk to me.
Yo, James, um
so they say I should be off by 6:00.
I should be home by 7:00 easy.
Uh, that's-that's cool, right?
Yeah. You're good 'til 7:00.
Just leave me a message.
Today is my Mobo Triton randonneur,
so I'll be off the grid for a bit.
Ah, all right.
Well, good luck, um, ran-gineering
or racketeering or
Hey, man, good luck with
whatever the fuck you doing.
But-but, uh, I'm good, though, right?
Yeah. Yeah. You're fine.
Just make sure you're home by 7:00.
All right.
All right, next, please.
Mm-hmm.
Next in line.
He's gonna love this, right?
Ashley, girl, I'm gonna
keep it 100 wit' you.
But this shit here is the sweetest thing
I have ever seen.
No, for real, if I was locked up
and if somebody proposed to me,
oh, bitch, conjugals
would be disgustin'.
Okay, okay, let's, uh,
just everybody just take a deep breath.
Today is gonna be perfect.
- Hey! Rainey.
- Rick!
- Please stay single file.
- Oh.
I sorry. I'll yeah. Mwah!
And mazel tov to you.
Not the greatest of surroundings,
but a simhah just the same.
- Hi, Uncle Rick!
- Oh, hi, Trishy.
You look amazing.
We still "dancing"?
No. No, no, no. Um,
private kink service now.
Oh, that's fun! That is fun.
And it's operating out of the house.
Rick, this is Ashley,
our beautiful bride-to-be,
and this is my grandson, Sean.
Ashley, this is Rick Ayers,
one of my oldest friends.
Yeah, from back in the protest days.
You and I have spent plenty
of time in jails, haven't we?
We would have spent more time
if it wasn't for your
get-out-of-jail trick.
Okay
What is happening?
Oh, what trick was that?
I used to flash cops
so we could get away
without being arrested.
Yeah, flash and dash.
Comes out of nowhere.
You can buy a few seconds.
So what are we
gonna do today; is, uh, Hindu, Jewish
Uh, you want me to give you a sampler?
Uh, just a loosely Catholic thing.
We're not too religious.
Fuck! Mommy, you just
You go ahead. You go ahead.
Okay. Okay, baby. Thank you.
My children here thought
I wasn't gonna remember to bring this.
This is expired.
- What?
- This ID is expired.
Oh, come on. It's clearly still me.
Couldn't we please just
Okay, I suppose a jail is
not the kind of place
I hate this fucking place.
Okay, I'm gonna run
home. You guys go in.
I'm gonna get my passport.
I'll be right back.
- Okay.
- Rainey, you're gonna miss it.
No, no, no, you go on in.
I promise I'll be back.
Fuck!
Arms out to the sides.
I-I'll do the ceremony
really fast when she gets back.
The only thing that really
matters is, well, the "I dos."
Yeah, but um, we haven't even
told him that he's getting married.
Kinda wanna sort of give him a minute
to marinate on that.
I'm sorry. What? He-he doesn't know?
Shit, he don't even know they engaged.
She found the ring in
the box of his stuff
that he left when he got locked up.
- Oh, boy.
- Yeah, but it was for me.
Uh, he hasn't given it to me yet,
but we found it in a shoebox
that was meant for me.
Yeah, okay, okay.
But I can't marry two people
when one of the people doesn't
know he's getting married.
That's non-consensual marriage.
That's a nuptial assault.
- Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Whoa, what?
That's that's not
what's happening here.
- All right.
- He-he wants to marry me.
Did he say that?
- No.
- Mm.
Um, but we all know.
Yes.
We all know he wants it.
- Oh what?
- What?
Okay, how are you gonna get
his signature on the marriage papers?
Okay. Is it my grill?
Well, we was just gonna forge that.
- Read the room, 'Nelle.
- Okay.
All right, fine. Uh, I can't do this.
Here you go. Enjoy.
Wait. No, no. Please.
We need to do this before
he transfers to San Quentin.
I will be an accessory to collusion.
I already got two strikes against me.
You're a very nice lady.
- You're very beautiful.
- OW!
He's so cute. I gotta go.
Are you fucking kidding me?
- No.
- Thanks, Rick.
Bye-bye, Trishy!
What am I gonna do?
Now this shit won't come out my mouth.
Okay, okay.
Get it out of my mouth. Ow ow ow!
Mom, are we not going to see Dad?
- No, look. We are. We are.
- Ow, ow! Damn!
Bitch, I am not a ketchup bottle.
Well, fuck.
I'm just trying to help.
No more visitors allowed in.
The next visitation block is in an hour.
- Shit.
- Come on!
It won't come out. It won't come out.
Hey, new guy.
We got another boat coming in.
So we're gonna be out a bit longer.
Are y-you sure? I gotta get back.
- 'Cause, you know, I mean, I
- Oh, don't worry 'bout that.
This happens all the time.
The office will notify everybody.
All right.
I have to be back by 7:00.
Fuck.
This isn't at all how I
imagined my wedding day.
I mean, honestly, I
never really imagined it.
But I guess I thought it would
be somewhere beautiful,
and my mom would be there.
And the worst thing that
I would have to worry about
is my period or something.
We tried it a few times.
First we said not until
after Sean was born.
Then my mom got sick,
so we got the tattoos.
Saved money, wanted
to do it the movie way
until we were better off.
We almost were.
Y'all hos know I could get ordained
in ten minutes or less?
Ash, I could be in charge
of your ceremony, girl, okay?
Ha. Don't trip. I got this.
Trishy to the motherfucking rescue.
- Thank you.
- Oh, Lord.
Look, look, it's okay.
Look, we still got
20 minutes left, okay?
It's good. We good.
Yeah, but this is crazy.
Doubling down when we're at our worst,
separated by an ocean
of metal and concrete.
I need to tell you somethin'.
Yeah.
I was married in Bali.
- What?
- Yeah.
For three years, to a man named Mustafa.
He, uh, he had a
two-year-old when I met him.
But, yeah, shit, we lived together.
I became a step-mom to
his daughter, Tiare.
And she has the prettiest smile,
and he he loved me
in a way that I had
never been loved here.
And we was a family.
Oh.
Have, um
'Nelle, you were a mom.
For a little bit, yeah.
Okay, y'all know I
can have my own church
when I finish this?
Oh, y'all having a
moment. My bad, bitches.
You wanna know something, though, Ash?
Love is easy when it's easy,
but when shit get hard,
sis, that's when you
supposed to double down.
That's what all that love is there for.
Did you double down?
I did.
But he didn't.
But Miles will, Ash.
He always will, 'cause
the shit y'all got is cosmic.
I-I'd call it Trish's Church.
"Come celebrate the ho-ly spirit."
Dickmatized.
- Girl, if you don't finish
- Uh.
My bad.
- What a place to start.
- Uh-huh. Uh-huh.
This ain't where y'all start, though.
You and Miles started
as two little nasty-ass
bad teenagers, okay?
And listen.
And the big day isn't the day
when you decide to be with somebody.
It's every day, Ash.
Every day that you wake up and you go,
"Ey, dat's my person."
And you and Miles got
years of that together.
Are you okay?
I'm getting there.
Well, I see why you didn't tell me.
His name is Mustafa.
You know I gotta roast you, right?
Bitch!
Listen, his ass is cute, okay?
I'm ordained, niggas.
This is the final call for visitation.
Fuck it. I'm doing this.
- We getting married.
- Ahh!
We can make it, we can make it.
Wait, shit, what about Rainey?
- No, she'll catch up. Let's go.
- Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Fuck! My grill.
- Bitch.
- Okay.
- You guys just go without me.
- Bitch, you're the minister.
Right, look. Lord, forgive me!
Wait, wait, wait, wait! Wait!
Okay. Okay.
Ah!
Ah, thank you sky zaddy.
- Oh, God.
- Okay.
Fuck.
Hey, this is James's work cell.
If you think you're fucking
up, you probably are.
Leave me a message.
Hey, James, look. It's Earl.
Um, look, we had to
tug a extra boat today,
so we're running a little late, man.
Look, I'm just now getting off the boat.
The port office told me
they'd take care of it,
but, uh, look, man, this
light is very fucking red.
So I'ma just head home.
Call me back. Call me back.
I'm going home right now.
It's cool. It's gonna be green.
When I get to the crib,
it's gonna be green.
It's cool, it's cool,
it's cool, it's cool.
Window five.
- You said five?
- Five, five, five.
Oh my God. Hello, beautiful.
Who the fuck are you?
- I'm Niles.
- Your name is what?
Niles Turner.
- Are you saying Niles or Miles?
- I'll say whatever you want.
Where is Miles?
Miles Turner with an M.
He may be in another visitation block.
Aw, shit. Listen, you just stay here.
- We gonna go find him, okay?
- No, no, no, no
I got you, sis, don't
worry. Come on, y'all.
Hold up, is that my baby?
What? I'm sorry.
Did you just say Miles Turner?
There's another inmate named
Miles Turner in this prison?
What are the odds? That's crazy.
W-what he look like?
White boy, slick-back hair,
California tattoo
with a star on the bay.
Oakland white boy?
Hold up, he had a partner
who looked kinda like Krayzie Bone
and they had lit a dude
on fire that one time?
- Yes.
- Okay.
I refuse to marry you.
I'm sorry. I have this effect on people.
I-I know you really wanted
it, but I gotta go, okay?
I got enough drama in my
life. I got heat on me.
I don't need yours. You understand.
Guard, tell Miles I said sorry.
More so Miles than you,
'cause this was really your fault.
I think I need solitary tonight.
Just, you know, separate
me from the other inmates
for my own safety.
The voicemail box
of the number you have dialed is full.
Fuck. Fuck!
Hey, baby.
Hey.
You're wearing a wedding dress.
I know.
Well, somebody doesn't listen.
When I get outta here,
I'm gonna give you
that ring, and if you
still want it then
I want it now.
And I want you now.
And I want you to know
that you have me now.
So I'm proposing that
you propose to me.
I want a house in San Quentin
and DVDs from that little cart thing
and cuddling.
Except for the cuddling part,
all that sounds terrible.
I know. Everything is terrible.
But I want to be in terrible with you.
But this is not how you planned it.
I mean, don't marry me out of guilt.
Miles,
we already are married.
You already are my partner.
I just need it on
paper so we can have sex
and Sean can hug his dad.
You got the ring.
We're almost there.
You don't owe me.
You don't owe me this.
What was the song you
were supposed to play me
during Sean's birth?
Too $hort's "Gettin' It"?
Good song.
Wrong song, and so I made
an executive decision,
and I took it off the playlist.
It was a good call.
Well, now I'm making
an executive decision.
- Oh.
- Mm.
Propose to me.
I know you practiced it
or you wouldn't have
bought me that ring.
Propose to me now.
You're serious.
Okay, we found it. We found it.
This is your family.
- Are you in?
- Dad?
I just do as I'm told.
- Yes.
- Yes!
Uh
can you lean forward, babe?
Ashley Rose
you and I have been
together for 12 years.
Wow.
But to me, you have always been my wife.
I am in love
with the mother you are to our son.
I'm in love with the
partner that you are to me.
And every day, I'm grateful
that we found each other
and that we get to go
through life together.
Now, I know that we say we don't know
the first thing about marriage.
But I think we know
everything there is to know
about being a team.
Except I skipped to
jewelry, and I forgot to ask.
But if you'll have me,
forever,
I know I can be happy anywhere,
as long as I have you.
So
Ashley Rose,
will you marry me?
Yes.
Is this why y'all are all dressed up?
I mean, we're gonna have to
wait till we get to Quentin
and we can do a marriage
thing there, I guess.
Oh, no, I'm wearing the
dress. We doing it now.
- Uh-huh.
- Hand on the glass, baby.
Uh, don't we need a priest for that?
- Ooh, I got this.
- She's ordained.
Ordained in what?
Hand.
Out, everybody.
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Wait. Um, okay, wait.
Dearly beloved, we are
gathered here today
- Skip ahead, sis.
- Okay, uh, um, um
- Faster.
- Okay.
Marriage is about love
and responsibility.
Are you just reading
off the walls right now?
Shit, I had very little prep time.
Trish, the end part. Come on.
- Okay, okay, okay.
- Out! All of you, now.
Do you, Miles, take thee, Ashley,
to be your lawfully wedded wife?
- Trish.
- I do.
- Out! All of you, now.
- Okay.
- Do you, Ashley, take thee
- Lady, let's go.
- We just need a few more seconds.
- Okay, okay, okay. Um
- We're done.
- And, um
- Okay, okay.
- Out, all of you now.
And do you, Ashley
- Whoa!
- Whoa.
Take thee, Miles, to be
your lawfully wedded husband?
- That's it.
- I do.
- Hey, my man.
- Everyone single file.
Can you take that ring and put it back
on your mom's finger for me?
- Everybody out now!
- Ma'am, ma'am, let's go.
- You can't grab me like that.
- Visitation's over.
Okay, I have rights
Hurry, hurry, hurry,
baby boy! Hurry, hurry!
Okay, okay. Okay.
By the power invested in me,
Reverend Trish Turner,
I now pronounce you husband and wife.
You may kiss the glass.
I know so many lawyers.
This is a violation of human rights.
This is assault.
Get it while
You can, you should be ♪
Gettin' it, get it
while The gettin' is good ♪
You should be gettin' it ♪
Get it while The gettin' is good ♪
Get it while you
can, You should be ♪
Gettin' it, get it
while The gettin' is good ♪
You should be gettin' it ♪
Get it while The gettin' is good ♪
Get it while you
can, You should be ♪
Gettin' it, get it
while The gettin' is good ♪
You should be gettin' it Get it ♪
While the gettin' is good ♪
Get it while you
can, You should be ♪
Gettin' it ♪
Get it while the gettin' Is good ♪
Get it while you
can, You should be ♪
Gettin' it, get it
While the gettin' is good ♪
Here I am.
Black as a magpie.
Tethered to this cage like a
like a broken wing ragtime.
Motherfucker can't even sing no more.
Nah.
Shit really is a fucking drag.
I ain't even get to say
goodbye to fam I almost had.
Shit just went bad.
This part of life
Is black and white ♪
Cut and dry, bastardized ♪
Grandfathered into Maximizin' ♪
Kind of back splitting
That keeps niggas gaspin' ♪
For their fucking life
What the fuck am I? ♪
Anyway, you cut the
pie I'm small fruit ♪
Strangely hung to dry ♪
From a pirouette to this
Body mine getting commodified ♪
Fuck, hey, man, fuck ♪
Back to the pen
Where the numbers die ♪
Final thoughts Of a native son ♪
Black tux like I'm
James Prophesied ♪
No, no, no, no, no ♪
Let me sit And smoke some mo ♪
Hit the corner store,
Simple living keep it hidden ♪
Not to prison, Not a
cog for the cotton gin ♪
Of cops and politicians, no ♪
'Cause they know They
wanna kill us slow ♪
And they know They fucking wrong ♪
Hey man, y'all know
That you're fucking wrong ♪
They wanna grab the kid,
Masquerade a passing slip ♪
As some sort of masochist ♪
Slap his wrist,
Trap his dividends ♪
For the next five to
ten To get his ass back ♪
Again, again ♪
Fuck! Nigga, don't you get it?
I get no final
plea, I'm no anomaly ♪
This ain't no odyssey,
I get no sovereignty ♪
Work just the same As a lobotomy ♪
Trying to turn me
Into a commodity ♪
If I'm for sale, then
Who the fuck is buyin' me? ♪
Hold up. Hold up, man.
Hey, it ain't even no one
Here to say goodbye to me ♪
Get your ass off me ♪
There's no one here
To say goodbye to me ♪
Bro, what the fuck
Are y'all doing? ♪
Hey, bro, hold up ♪
It ain't even no one
here To say goodbye to me ♪
Oh, shit I gotta say goodbye ♪
I gotta say good-bye to me ♪
Oh, fuck.
- Mama, mama. What happened?
- I don't know.
I was in the garage eating sorbet
and I found this in the living room.
What is it?
It says, "Tell Ashley congratulations."
What's what's the rest of it say?
It's his recipe for curry chicken.
Love, the Spice King.
It's only been a month.
You should be gettin' it ♪
- Get it while ♪
- Rad.
Yeah, bruh.
You're married?
Yeah, man. Married, bro.
I did not know you could do that.
Apparently, you can
get married in prison.
I did not know.
How nobody told me that.
Very glad you and Val didn't do that.
Sames.
You don't still talk to her, do you?
Nope.
Thank the fucking Lord.
I'm trying to come see you, man.
- I really am.
- Yeah, no.
I mean, you know, whenever you got time.
I'm not going anywhere, but you know.
Um, it's been, um
Come visit when you can.
I will, I'm just trying to work out
- some things.
- And check on the family.
- I will.
- They're
- Yeah, man.
- Losing their goddamn mind.
And now your sister is back in the mix,
which I didn't even know
she was fucking back.
But now she's kicking it with her.
You know how her and Ashley get.
They start winding each other all up
and getting crazy and shit.
I'm a little worried about that.
- Hugs with tears.
- Yeah.
Uh, how's Sean?
Yeah, no, Sean's good.
I miss him. He's good?
He'll be all right.
- He'd love to see you though.
- Yeah.
I'm just a little, uh
Yeah. Hey, look, uh
- You gotta go.
- I gotta go.
I gotta use the rest
of my time to call Ash.
All right, cool. I
got some things to tell you.
- Yeah, man.
- Uh, but next time.
- Love you, man.
- Yeah, man, love you too bro.
- Peace.
- All right. Peace.
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