Irreverent (2022) s01e08 Episode Script

1
Rev, if we don't pull this off,
they're gonna kill you.
- You get that, right?
- I do get that.
- Thank you, Daisy.
- I'm saying
I know what you're saying.
But we don't let that freak us out.
We let that focus us.
This is a small community,
that is a big safe,
and everything leaves a trail.
[SIGHS] Ron and Margie
searched the area.
I heard Aidan ask them last night.
They're not exactly Bonnie
and Clyde, all right?
If they found the safe, they would have
handed it back over to Piper.
It's always the quiet ones.
You're telling me.
My grandfather built this wall.
Look at this freaking mess, will ya?
Not what you'd call a
surgical strike, is it?
- Oh, no.
- I don't think we're talking
- criminal masterminds here.
- [LAUGHS]
Does anyone spring to mind
who might be responsible?
Disgruntled employees and the like?
Oh, are you kidding?
They're all disgruntled!
Look at the fricking wall!
Well, what about threats? Grudges?
I mean, your mate Amy Duncan,
she's gotta be suspect
number one, number two,
and bloody three as well.
I mean, how many times have you had to
cut her off the front gate?
There's a big jump from waving a placard
- to burglary.
- Look at the wall!
Yeah, but, I mean, she
was here the other day
with the new rev, banging
on about back pay and wages
and, well, surprise!
Guess what's in the safe!
- Come on, guess, guess, guess.
- We get it. We get it.
- I don't think you do get it.
- Listen.
- Do you get it?
- She is definitely
a person of interest, right? Relax.
If Amy didn't do it,
she bloody well knows who did.
And don't be wrapping everything
in that crime scene tape.
I've got a business to run here!
Get a warrant, will ya?
Pay Amy a visit.
Worst case, we rule
her out as a suspect.
She's annoying. She's not a thief.
She's not past pulling
a stunt like this either.
- Get the warrant.
- Okay, I'll ask.
But there are two Rold Gold crazies
I want to talk to first.
[BACKGROUND CHATTER, LAUGHTER]
- [LAUGHING]
- [MAN MUTTERING]
You boys having fun?
Yes, it's awesome. You wanna go?
So, what have you boys been up to?
Not much.
Just stuff.
Weren't doing not much at the
mill yesterday by any chance?
You took your time.
Go feed yourselves to the
fish or something, will ya?
Mill got robbed yesterday.
I thought you'd be round like a shot.
You seem to know all about it.
Oh, bush telegraph, love.
You know Clump is.
You can't hide nothing.
You won't mind if I
take a look around then?
You honestly don't think my boys did it.
They can hardly walk and
talk at the same time.
My fault, of course.
Shouldn't have drank so
much when I was preggers.
But hey, you live and you learn, right?
But you remember that
for when you get married.
Thanks for the advice.
Is the Rev gonna do ya?
Oh, he is gonna marry you and Aidan?
Well, yes, that's the plan.
Lovely.
I still need to look in your shed.
Oh yeah, knock yourself out.
[LIGHT MUSIC]
♪
[CHEERY VOCAL MUSIC]
♪
Margie, what's this?
Margie!
You've thrown out my projector!
Oh no!
Don't go taking that
rubbish back inside.
I just put it out!
But there's nothing wrong with it!
And these movies are vintage.
Oh, they're vintage dust
collectors, more like
- Oh, put them down, Ron.
- I'm taking them back.
- And this. I'll have that too.
- No, you're not taking that.
- No, give it to me.
- No! No one wants to
- listen to you sing, Ron.
- They might!
- Oh, they do not.
- Morning, guys.
- Rev.
- Morning, Rev.
Uh, what's happening
here? You guys moving out?
Hard rubbish week.
Eh?
Every six months, the council truck
comes and picks up
any junk you throw out.
This is not junk. This is history.
Rev, does this look like junk to you?
It normally turns into
an enormous swap meet.
You put stuff out.
Your neighbors take it.
Six months later, they put it out,
- and you take it back again.
- That's my racquet!
Well, I was just
swinging by to say thanks
for helping look for Helen last night.
It's just what you do.
Yeah, we nearly got lost ourselves,
actually, out near the mill,
because the car broke down again.
- Hey, did you hear it got robbed?
- What, your car?
No, the mill.
Millions of dollars taken, apparently.
Spock Sinclair reckons
it was foreign spies
stealing trade secrets.
Hey, come in for a cuppa,
Rev. I've just made scones.
I've been looking for that.
Give the scones a wide birth.
You could tile your patio with them.
So, nobody was around the mill
- to give you guys a jump, huh?
- No.
Not until that lovely boy turned up
to tinker with our engine.
Daisy.
Dais.
Hey, Dais.
- Okay, where is he?
- Why are we whispering?
Where's the Rev? Seriously, where is he?
How would I know?
Okay, look, Dais, he's
he's not who you think he is.
Yeah? He's like this foreign crook.
He stole the safe from the mill.
- What are you talking about?
- Dais, look.
[UNEASY MUSIC]
There. I've got it on video.
My drone was following
along with the runners.
I've caught him red-handed.
I went and got it last night.
I'm gonna take it to Piper.
No.
You cannot do that.
- [SCOFFS]
- I know this looks really bad,
but you've got it all wrong.
Daisy, you saw
Okay.
The Rev did steal the safe, yeah.
But it was for a good reason,
and you cannot dob him in to Piper.
Otherwise, he'll be in so much trouble.
T-that's the point. He's dodgy as.
I could go to juvie.
Oh, you
You helped him.
It's not what you think, Cam.
- Daisy.
- Please, I promise.
Ah.
Hey, priest man, look.
Brand new!
That is astonishing.
You want to buy this thing?
Uh, no, but thank you.
Hey, uh, Piper.
Are you interested in kitchenware?
Archil's got you.
No. Ron and Margie home?
Uh, yeah, they are.
In fact, I just had one of his scones.
Oh.
Yeah, I wouldn't recommend it.
Hey, they were telling me
about the, um, mill robbery.
And apparently, there
were millions of dollars
in blood diamonds and stolen art?
They were out near the mill last night.
Hopefully, they saw
something, or someone.
Yeah. Good idea. Yeah. Smart.
Mill Manager said you were there
a couple days ago, actually, with Amy?
Mm-hmm. Yeah, I was just helping her out
with a meeting about some
back pay and overtime.
You know, really just moral support.
He said Amy got pretty worked up.
I wouldn't say that. No.
I mean, sure, she was passionate,
but it's her cause.
You're not trying to protect her
from anything by any chance?
Protecting her from what?
It's hard to believe we were
running right past the mill
when they were robbing it.
Don't suppose you saw
anything unexpected?
[SNORTS] No.
All I saw was you kicking my butt.
Well, there's always next year.
You can bet on it.
I'll, uh, see you later for the, uh,
Ties That Bind session.
Aidan can't wait.
Uh, yeah, me neither.
See you there.
[SOFTLY] Shoot.
[COUGHING]
[LIGHT MUSIC]
♪
[COUGHS]
[CAP CLATTERS]
Hey!
Get off of
Get off! I can't breathe!
Hey
[THUD]
Cameron?
[LABORED BREATHING]
Where's Paulo Keegan?
Who?
The man whose credit
card you've been using.
I found that.
In a leather bag. I found it.
Ah.
What are you doing?
[STEAM HISSES]
What's that for?
Where's Paulo and the money?
Look, I don't know
anything about the money.
Hey, just look at me.
Let's just talk. Talk to me.
Talk to me. Look at me. Let's just talk.
Talk to me. Talk to me.
Talk to me. Look, look, wait.
Just wait. Wait.
[HISS] Okay, wait. Wait, wait.
Okay, he's in Clump. He's in Clump.
It is a town in
Queensland. I swear to God.
I know it sounds like a joke,
but I'm a reverend, I'm swear.
Don't! Stop!
Stop it right now! I swear to God,
he's there, pretending to be me!
That's what he's doing!
Stop! Please stop!
Paulo a priest?
I'm sorry I took your money, okay?
I'm sorry. I didn't know it was yours.
I just knew it couldn't
have been his, okay?
So you don't even have to go out there.
So please just stop. Please.
Where's the cash now?
It's gone.
My wife my ex-wife,
she took it from me.
And she loves shopping,
so she could be anywhere.
So I'm sorry about
all this. I really am.
I apologize. I apologize.
This is my fault. This is
my what are you doing, man?
What are you doing? What are you doing?
I'm sorry! I don't know!
We'll put a trace on her number.
Daisy?
We're in here.
Hey, Rev. I was just telling
Cam about your amazing plan.
- Oh yeah?
- Rev.
Uh
Yeah.
He had drone footage of you
hiding the safe in the forest,
and he was gonna go tell Piper.
But you let him in on the amazing plan.
Yeah, how you're like Robin Hood,
and you're gonna give all
the money to the mill workers.
Rob from the rich, am I right?
Rev, you're a legend.
Cam has something to show you.
Cam, you are a legend.
[GRUNTING] All right, all right.
Little straighter, guys.
There you go.
Okay.
Yeah.
- That was genius, Cam.
- Yeah.
Doesn't look heavy, but, uh, it is.
[CHUCKLES]
We're just gonna leave this in here.
I'll figure out some way to hide it
until I can get the
right tools to open it.
But if anybody asks, especially Piper,
you don't know anything about
a safe, you understand me?
Yeah, yeah. Got it.
Good.
I'm
I-I'm not gonna go to jail, am I?
No, man.
Nobody put Robin Hood in jail.
Oh. Ha ha.
You could have just told him
that we had to steal
the safe to save his ass.
He is a big boy.
No, he would be gutted.
You know, he would rather get beaten up
by those bikies than
steal workers' money,
insurance or no insurance.
He's gotta lean how the
world works, eventually.
Maybe.
Just not yet.
[PHONE LINE RINGING]
Boss.
Her phone puts her at a
hotel in Surfer's Paradise.
I'll text the address.
Pick up the money and find Paulo.
No loose ends.
Bear.
I want photos.
Ohh ow.
What do you want?
A family reunion.
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
[SIGHS]
Mooch. Who's he?
He is here for the money.
All right, all right, all
right, all right, all right
- Ohh
- Hey.
Where is it?
- Well, I I don't I don't
- Charmaine.
I don't have the money.
Charmaine, give him the money.
This is not a nice man.
No offense.
Please. Char, Char,
Char, Char, look at me.
Char. Char.
Please give him the money.
[UNEASY MUSIC]
♪
Where's the rest?
Oh, Charmaine.
Pardon me for enjoying myself after
all these years of penny pinching.
- Char, this man doesn't care.
- I mean, I've had to
- deal with secondhand
- Shut up.
What's this? Hmm?
A cruise?
I'm sailing home tomorrow.
Ah.
Not anymore.
Get dressed.
We're all going to Clump.
- [FOOTSTEPS APPROACH]
- [EXHALES]
What's up?
Sorry.
Search warrant?
Not my idea.
Are you kidding me?
I need to know where you
were yesterday afternoon.
Is this about the mill?
Seriously.
Amy, just tell me where you were,
and we can get this over and done with.
No, no.
I'll give you a hand.
We can search together.
Amy, come on.
Where did I put that mill safe?
Obviously not under a sofa.
Well, I don't know. You're the boss.
Tell me!
Back here?
- Jesus!
- Back here anywhere?
- Amy, will you stop!
- I see you, mill safe.
Not doing a very good job.
What are you doing?
Wait! Come back!
You've got a job to do, Piper.
All you had to do was tell
me where you were yesterday
and why Mack went with you to the mill.
- It was that easy.
- You've cracked it, Officer!
Me and the Rev knocked over the mill.
You're looking at
Clump's first millionaire.
- Can't you tell?
- For once, I wish
you and me would just
have a normal conversation
- like normal friends.
- We're not normal friends!
Amy, it was ten years ago.
I've apologized already.
Have you? I don't think I remember that.
You were the one who
backed out, remember?
We were meant to go together,
and you said you didn't
want to go anymore.
I said I couldn't go!
Not right then!
Mum was a mess after Dad left us!
Why couldn't you wait?
Why didn't you come later?
Why?
Because-because we were
supposed to do it together.
[CRYING]
I knew if I didn't
leave then, I'd back out.
And I'd just end up trapped in Clump,
settling for the same old everything
and a shitty job at the mill.
Oh.
Nice, Piper.
Thanks.
[SOMBER MUSIC]
♪
[DOOR SLAMS]
Yeah.
[PHONE CHIMING]
[CHIMING]
Put it on speaker.
[CONTINUES CHIMING]
Hey.
Be very careful.
Hey, hey!
Paulo. How are you?
Hey, listen, man, what's up with this
Ties That Bind thing?
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, that's the church's
premarital counseling.
The three Ps of marriage
passion, patience, persistence.
Well, it's good to know
that romance isn't dead.
Uh, wait, are
am I on speakerphone? Are
you driving somewhere?
Uh, yeah, buddy. I'm on
my way to the airport.
Charmaine left me some money
for a plane ticket home.
- Well, lucky you.
- So I guess this is goodbye.
Paulo.
I will never, ever
forget you, okay, pal?
Yeah. No, you're gonna
be hard to forget too.
So, uh, yeah, the three Ps.
- You were saying?
- Right. Well, persistence.
That's the most important one.
Hanging in there when things get tough.
You know, not running
off with somebody else
at the drop of the hat.
Or putting their finger
somewhere they shouldn't
and whispering "I love you"
Uh, I think that's enough detail, man.
And then ripping you
off the next morning.
I mean, what sort of woman does that
when she knows that you
still care about her?
[BEEP]
Weird.
Good day?
Could have handled it better.
Where's my cat mug? The one Mum got me.
Sorry, Pipes, I put it out
with the hard rubbish this morning.
It was all cracked.
Sorry.
We'll get you a new one.
- What's going on?
- Don't worry about it.
It's just a mug.
Hey, Lester.
Ah.
Impeccable timing,
Rev. I need a miracle.
I guess I'm your guy.
Ron wants to fire up this old thing.
Don't know where on
earth he got the idea
that Renee'd have some
40-year-old projection globe
just lying around the place.
Yeah, no, what was he thinking?
Anyway, how may I be of service?
Renee's at netball,
so I'm manning the shop
- for the next couple hours.
- Yeah, great.
All right, I need a 5-inch angle grinder
with silicon carbide disks,
uh goggles,
gloves, face shield,
and an extension cord,
as long as you got.
You certainly know your
way around the tool shed.
What's all this for then?
It's kind of a secret
project I got going on,
so I need you to keep
it on the down low.
No worries, Rev. It's in the vault.
There you are, thank goodness.
Oh, morning, Peter.
So, the bishop is coming back tomorrow
to finally make her
decision on the church.
- Tomorrow?
- And it's a catastrophe.
And my marriage is in tatters,
and the whole town is in
the grip of a crime wave.
Okay, Pete-Peter, just slow
down for a second, all right?
Let Piper handle the crime wave.
You focus on getting Helen back,
and let me handle the bishop.
- Yeah?
- There we go, Rev.
All right, great.
So, listen, my, um, my
salary hasn't come in yet.
Is it all right if I pay Renee later?
I'm sure God's good for it.
- There you go.
- Thanks, buddy.
Wh-wha-wha
Reverend?
All right, get in there.
Yeah, all right.
So?
Pay day.
Oh my God.
Rev, the workers are gonna love you.
Yeah. All right.
Empty it out. Put it in the box.
Get it back in the cupboard
with the others, yeah?
Good. And, uh, Cam.
Oh.
Take this over to Renee
to pay for the tools.
Yeah.
I have got some Revving to do.
So, uh, after you finish,
make sure to cover this up,
and we'll clean it up later.
Okay.
[LAUGHING]
He's going to kill us.
- You know that, right?
- No.
No, we don't know that.
When he finds Mack, he
won't need us anymore.
No.
We have to get away now.
- While we still can.
- No.
Honey.
Who are we? Okay, he
Greg teach you that?
Come on.
Let's go.
Let's go!
Are you gonna chew through my hand? Huh?
Oh, that might make
sense, 'cause you already
- chewed through my heart.
- No.
No. It's gotta come off.
It's not coming it's not coming off.
- Stop.
- It'll come off.
Stop. Stop. It's not coming off.
Look, just run into
the road, get somebody,
and bring back help, okay?
- Just do that.
- No. I'm not leaving you.
Well, that would be a
welcome change, wouldn't it?
We're about to become outback roadkill,
- and you want to bring up Greg!
- I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
I always thought you just
loved bringing up Greg.
Damn it.
All right, he's going
back. All right, go.
Now's your chance.
Please!
Hey, hey, hey, no, it's all right.
Hey.
- Oh, Mooch.
- Come on.
Two by two. Right?
Two by two.
You're such a reverend.
[LAUGHS]
Hey!
Hey, run, babe! Run, Char! Run!
Hey! Don't hurt her! Don't you hurt her!
Let go! Let go of me!
- No!
- Hey!
Damn it! Don't hurt her!
Hey! Don't hurt her!
Get off of her!
Shut up!
Stop it! Don't you hurt her!
Get off of me!
Hey. Hey.
Get in the trunk.
[THUMPING, THUDDING]
Hey, Rev.
Hey, guys.
Uh, good to see you.
Didn't pick you for a weekend warrior.
Ah. Well, I will have you know
have a seat, please.
Probably shouldn't tell you this,
but I'm actually working
on a little secret project.
Not even gonna give us a hint?
Well, what kind of secret keeper
would I be if I told you?
Right.
Well, I have to get
back to work soon, so
No. Yes. Of course.
This won't take long at
all. We'll get started.
The first thing that
we need to talk about
are the three Ps of marriage.
- Sounds good.
- Sounds like marketing jargon.
You know, it's actually
kind of the same thing.
I mean, supply and
demand. Husband and wife.
It's you still need
those three Ps,
and they are passion,
positivity, and perseverance.
Well, I think we've got that
covered, don't we, Pipes?
Especially the passion part.
This is a waste of time.
I mean, what do you
know about marriages?
Yours has imploded, right?
Piper.
Pipes!
I am so, so sorry, Rev.
It's this whole mill thing.
- It's really getting to her.
- Come on, man.
No, not at all.
This is why we have
these sessions, right?
To get it all out before the big day.
- Sure, sure.
- Yeah.
So, go after her. Yeah.
Sorry.
Piper.
Sir, can we just give her some water?
Can we just do that?
It's gotta be a million
degrees in that trunk.
It is boiling outside.
Can we please just give her
just a little bit of water?
Please. Please.
[PUNCHY MUSIC]
[SIGHS] Jeez.
♪
Daisy, I thought you were
hiding the pay packets
in the wine box.
- We did.
- No, seriously.
Legit. I left them in the cupboard.
Where is Cam?
He went to the hardware
store like you asked.
Hey. It's okay.
I've known him for forever,
and there's no chance
he would rip you off.
He'd do anything for you.
Even play Robin Hood?
It's always the quiet ones, right?
[DOGS BARKING]
[LIGHT MUSIC]
♪
What are you doing, Cam?
Nothing, Mr. Kneebone. I was
Um
Uh, this is yours.
What's this?
- My back pay from the mill?
- Yeah.
- You didn't
- No, no, no, no.
No, look, I can't say nothing,
so please don't ask me anything.
But it's not right, them
keeping all that money
and stringing you out.
- This is thousands!
- Well, yeah.
Thought you might need it.
I've been worried bloody sick.
Thank you.
Don't thank me.
I'm just delivering.
Just think of it like, um
think of it like it's
a gift from the heavens.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome, Mr. Kneebone.
Hey, Michelle!
Where are you, you
pocket-sized piece of
Oi.
- Hey, just take it easy, yeah?
- I will.
Hey.
Hey, Dais. Hey, Rev.
Hey, buddy.
You can relax. All done.
Um what's all done, Cam?
The pay packets.
I handed them all out.
You all of them, huh?
Yeah. Yeah. Oh, you should have seen me.
I fanged it.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
You know, the people really,
really needed that money, Rev.
I hear you, man. I really do, but, um,
I just I thought that the
plan that we all agreed on
was to leave the packets
inside the church,
in the vestry, right?
Yeah, but you know, like you
said, it was like Robin Hood.
Rob the rich, give to the poor.
I figured I'd save you the trouble.
Honestly, it was kind of awesome.
[LAUGHS]
What did I snuff up? What happened?
No, you did the right thing. 100%.
Okay.
The Rev was just worried about you.
Didn't want you getting in trouble.
- That's all.
- Me?
- Yeah.
- Rev.
- Right, Rev?
- Yeah.
Yeah. It's
Glad you're all right, man.
Aww.
I just need to know, Cam,
did-did anybody see you?
Nope.
Nobody.
Except, yeah, one person.
Keith Kneebone. It's cool, though.
- He's cool.
- Yeah?
- Okay?
- Yeah.
Well, I am so proud of you.
You are such a hoodlum.
Rev, seriously, it was no big deal.
Yeah.
No big deal.
Charmaine.
Char, can you hear me?
I'm sorry.
But listen to me, I am
gonna get us out of here.
I promise you, okay?
I am gonna get us out of here.
You dreamt of a more exciting life.
I know that.
Probably not this exciting, but
I know why you're disappointed.
I do, Char. I
I stopped listening.
And I didn't I
didn't protect your heart
like I promised you when we first met.
And I want us to try again.
Okay? Can we do that, Char?
Huh? Can we try again?
Listen, we should probably
get her out of the trunk
now, okay?
It's probably like an oven in there.
She can just sit in the backseat.
Can we do that?
Charmaine.
Char, answer me right now. Char.
What's the shovel for?
Drive.
Why do we need a shovel?
Now drive.
Are you gonna do a run or what?
Why would I do that?
Maybe because you owe the bikies $50,000
and you don't have it?
It's all right. I'll think of something.
You are so annoying.
These guys seriously hurt people.
And what if they do
something really bad to you?
You're overdrawn 50 grand.
You're right. I don't have any cash.
But that doesn't mean I can't pay them.
I deal with people like
this all the time, kid.
I'll be fine.
Promise.
Hey, Rev.
Hey. What's up, Amy?
I caught you some fish.
Oh. Well, look at that.
That is impressive.
Yeah, well, I'm an old
pro. Dad lived for it.
The other day, while you guys
were all fun-running around,
I went to his favorite fishing spot.
An old turtle came
up alongside the boat,
and I swear, it was Dad saying, "Hi."
You know I have to have you committed.
Yeah, yeah.
[CLATTERING] Oh.
What the hell is this?
It's a surprise.
The mill workers want to say thanks.
We all do.
For what?
The back pay from the safe turned up.
Of course, Piper thinks it was me.
Even searched my house.
But Keith says you had
something to do with it.
Yeah, I heard Keith
liked to tell stories.
That he does, right.
Here he is, everyone.
Hey!
Hey, everybody.
- Here he is!
- God bless you all.
Look, guys, I think there must
be some kind of mistake here.
Nah, Rev. We've all received
our gifts from heaven,
and we come in here to tidy
up the gardens to say thanks.
Well, that is super kind of you guys.
But those gifts that you got?
They're from God.
Yeah, that's not me.
Well, you tell God his
secret is safe with us.
I, uh, yeah, look, I see
what's happening here.
Look, this sort of thing happened
in the Bible all the time.
I mean, there was lots of
gossip going around Jerusalem,
and Jesus walking around
the water, curing the lepers,
and people like to talk, and
they just get carried away.
That's it. Really.
You say what you want.
But I know what I believe.
I respect that. I really do.
And believe me, I prayed for you.
I prayed for all of you like
I have never prayed before.
And who knows? Maybe God heard me.
But that is it.
I mean, you guys have
all heard the proverb
"If it sounds too good to
be true, it probably is"?
Jesus wrote that.
Whatever you reckon.
But we're still gonna tidy up
the garden, right, everyone?
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
Ah, well, bless you all.
Ah just yeah.
I'll be right back.
Hey, Your Holy. This is a surprise.
Yeah, for both of us.
Quite a turnout you've got here.
Isn't it, though?
"If it sounds too good to
be true, it probably is"?
Where does it say that in Proverbs?
It's a loose translation from the Greek.
[SPEAKING GREEK]
Exactly.
Look, I know that you're
really busy at the moment,
but we need to talk.
About the church.
Right.
You gonna be here in the morning?
Is the Pope Catholic?
All right. Well, see you then, then.
Mm-hmm.
Can you ?
Yeah, that's not gonna work.
- I see.
- Yep.
Come on.
- Reverend.
- Oh.
Hey, Peter.
How you doing, man?
I didn't know we were gardening.
Oh yeah.
No, we've had it planned for weeks.
Right.
Yeah, I was thinking of
writing Helen an organ song.
No.
No, I mean, that's definitely
not no, you're trying to woo
her, right, not bury her.
That's a hard no.
Well, it's something I know.
Yeah, but it's not the
only thing you know, right?
I mean, you know Helen.
She's my wife.
Yeah, exactly.
So
Look, sit.
Sit.
We're gonna figure this out.
Tell me about Helen.
She likes lots of things.
- Okay.
- Travel.
- Mm-hmm.
- Cooking Moroccan tangines.
Tagines.
She loved going to the movies
before the cinema closed down.
That's it. Yeah.
Great idea.
Take her on a date.
You know, hit the reset button.
I guess we could go to
the Sugar Cane Museum.
That's not a date, Peter.
That's a field trip.
Oh my God, you do not have a
romantic bone in your body, do you?
I used to.
You know what, Peter?
I think I know a way to find it again.
You know how to sew?
Okay, Pete. Oh, screen. Screen.
Oh, here we go.
Look at that.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
- Where are you taking me?
- You'll see.
- What have you cooked up?
- It's a surprise.
Do you remember the last
time that you blindfolded me?
[BOTH LAUGHING]
Okay. We're here.
Little step forward.
Little step forward.
That's it. And I'll go this way.
Peter, if this is
another church function,
I'll never forgive you.
Welcome to Clump Beach Cinema.
[ALL CHEERING]
This is divine.
Did you really do all
of this just for me?
I had some help.
It's perfect.
Shall we?
Best seats in the house.
Thank you.
Hello.
- Hey.
- Hiya, yeah.
- No worries.
- Enjoy.
- Hey, guys.
- Hey.
Hey, Cam, where did you get that mug?
Oh, Archil sold it to me.
It's Piper's.
Cam's now.
All right, how much?
10? 10 bucks?
- 10 bucks?
- 20.
- No, I heard 10.
- No.
- 20.
- Definitely heard 10.
- 20.
- 20.
All right. Can I take one of these?
Yeah. On the house.
Have you guys seen Pipes anywhere?
No? [CHATTER]
Have a good night.
- Hi.
- Hi.
So, did you two and
Peter organize all this?
- Came up great, didn't it?
- Yeah.
It was Rev's idea.
Huh.
- May I?
- Sure.
[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
♪
Rev?
[MOVIE SCREAM]
Rev?
Ah.
Hey, Sheriff .
Why don't you come on up?
I got the best seats in the house.
[HOWLING]
I love this part.
Oh, I can't watch.
- [SNARLING]
- Me too.
Make yourself comfy.
Wow.
Not too shabby, huh?
So, this is your big secret project.
Ah, it was a team effort.
I heard you bought an angle grinder
and some diamond blades.
Yeah. I did.
Worked pretty good, too.
- Cuts like butter.
- Cuts what exactly?
See those metal uprights?
Of course.
I thought you forget what I thought.
Sorry, it's been a week.
I almost arrested Amy
for robbing the mill.
- Yikes.
- Some best friend, huh?
Wait.
Wasn't she out on Victor's
boat that afternoon?
- She told you that?
- Yeah.
Talking to turtles or something.
Why the hell wouldn't she just tell me?
Small town policing must be rough.
Yeah.
Bunch of hardened criminals who
build moonlight beach cinemas.
There you go.
The werewolf. Run! Run!
Larry!
Wait, Larry!
You were on to me today, you know?
All that three P stuff.
You were right. It is
total and utter crapola.
Don't tell Aidan. He loved it.
Look, marriage has to
be all the things, right?
It wants to be
vulnerable and safe, sure,
but it wants to be adventurous and
exciting and wild and messy.
It has to challenge you to
just do better, to be better.
Right?
I mean, how are you supposed
to predict who is gonna
be able to give you all that?
Jesus fell in love with
a prostitute, right?
Guessing he didn't see that coming.
Well, he probably couldn't help himself.
- She was so gorgeous.
- That is definitely it.
Smart and funny.
Kind of full of herself.
You should be careful
with these secret projects.
People might actually start to like you.
I'd better go.
Aidan's down there.
Ah, yeah.
[PHONE CHIME]
Go another round?
Priest didn't show up with the cash.
Can't trust anyone these days.
All right.
We gave him his chance.
Let's go, Biscuits.
Now, dig another one.
[DARK MUSIC]
♪