Konosuba: God's Blessing on This Wonderful World! (2016) s01e08 Episode Script

1
So cold.
I pawned my coat too. It's so cold.
The fire!
Hey, what are you doing?
Stop screwing around!
What are you doing
to my only memento of Japan?
I don't have any choice!
There is nothing else to burn!
Hand over that raiment then!
It looks like it would burn
better than a tracksuit!
Let go of it, you shut-in NEET!
Warm me up!
Warm me up more!
Wait, stop!
I can't go on like this.
We have to do something.
(KONOSUBA:
God's Blessing on This Wonderful World!)
(Episode 8: A Loving Hand for Our Party
When We Can't Make It Through Winter!)
Our team is poorly balanced.
I'd like a skill that I could
use more like a main weapon.
All right, we're here. Listen, Aqua.
I'll say this when I have the chance.
Don't throw any fits, got it?
Hey, what are you talking about?
What do you take me for?
I am not hoodlum or outlaw.
I am a goddess, a bona fide deity!
Hey! Are you listening to me?
Wait! You should listen
gratefully when a goddess speaks!
Welco
It's you, the undead!
You opened up a shop here?
I'm sleeping in a stable
and you're running a shop?
You're pretty full of yourself for a lich!
I'll burn this shop to the ground
in the name of God
Ow!
Mr. Kazuma!
Hello, Wiz, it has been a while.
Konosuba.
Don't you even serve tea at this shop?
Oh, I'm sorry! I'll bring some
for you right away!
I see she hasn't changed.
Her name is Wiz.
She may look like an ordinary
human, but she is actually a lich.
She is a ruler of the undead,
also known as the "No-Life King".
Although Wiz is a
lich, she is a kind girl.
Every night, she sends spirits wandering
the graveyard to Heaven.
Though various circumstances,
we took up that job
and ended up letting her go, but
Here you go.
It's delicious.
You can set up a shop
even though you're an undead,
and you can prepare warm tea
even though you're an undead.
I'm sorry.
The likes of me should
not live in such luxury!
Stop acting like a
spiteful sister-in-law.
Wiz, I have some spare points saved up.
Could you teach me a skill?
Hey! What are you thinking, Kazuma?
I can't put up with attendant's learning
of a lich's skills!
Who is an attendant?
Listen, liches love
gloomy and dismal places.
The whole lot of them are
basically related to slugs!
That is terrible!
But people normally
can't learn lich skills, right?
I was thinking it could be
a great asset in battle
if I could learn skills like that.
Um
Did she say an attendant earlier?
That's right.
I am Aqua.
Yes, the goddess Aqua,
worshipped by the Akuxisi teach.
Renounce yourself, Lich!
Hey, Wiz. There is no need
to get so scared.
No, it's
There are lots of crazy
people in the Akuxisi teach,
and it's common knowledge that it's
best not to get involved with them,
so when I heard that she's the
goddess of the Akuxisi teach
What did you say?
Curse you! This is what you get!
This conversation is not going anywhere.
Konosuba.
By the way, I heard that
you defeated Mr. Verdia.
His skill with the sword
was supposed to be
quite impressive, even
among the other leaders,
so that's quite amazing.
You sound as if you knew Verdia.
That's because I'm one of the eight
leaders of the Devil King's army.
Got you!
Wait! Please wait, Master Aqua!
I beg you! Please listen
to what I have to say!
I did it, Kazuma!
With this, all my debts will be forgiven!
In fact, I should get change back!
Hey, Aqua, at least hear her out.
Listen, as an adventurer,
I obviously can't put up with the fact
that you're a leader
of the Devil King's army.
You have got it all wrong!
I was asked to maintain the barrier
that protects the Devil King's castle!
I have never harmed humans,
and you won't receive any
bounty for defeating me either!
I don't really get it,
but I'll eliminate you just in case.
Please wait, Master Aqua!
Konosuba.
So you're saying we can open the path
to the Devil King's castle by defeating
all of his leaders, right?
Yes, that's correct!
That's what the Devil King asked of me!
He said he wouldn't stop me from quietly
managing my shop in a human settlement,
but only asked that I shall maintain
the barrier as one of his leaders.
So, as long as you are around,
humans cannot invade
the Devil King's castle?
Kazuma, let's eliminate her.
Wait! Please wait!
Please at least let me
live a little while longer!
I still have something I need to do.
I could easily break a simple barrier.
But she's a lich, so let's eliminate her.
Please wait!
Hang on.
Even if we break the barrier right now,
we can't defeat the
Devil King at our current levels.
We will just end up being beheaded.
Okay, fine.
Thank you very much!
But are you okay with this?
You don't resent us for
defeating Verdia or anything?
It's not as though I was particularly
close to Mr. Verdia or anything.
Whenever I walked around
My hand slipped!
He was the one who would often
roll his own head down by my feet,
and try to look up my skirt.
Strike! In so many ways, a total strike!
Besides, I believe
my heart is human, even now.
Here I go!
Okay, I'll teach you
one of my skills then.
It's the least I can do to repay you
for letting me go before.
What's wrong?
All of my skills can only
be used on an opponent.
Aqua, sorry, but would you do it?
What skill is an undead
planning to use on me?
Well
How about Drain Touch?
It's a skill that absorbs
an opponent's health and magic,
and can distribute that
power to others then.
I see. Depending on how it's used,
it might be to compensate for
our party's lack of firepower.
Of course,
I will only absorb a very small amount.
Fine. Absorb as much as you can.
Go ahead.
It's getting hard to tell
who the lich is and who the goddess is.
Okay, please excuse me.
Come on, what's the matter?
Aren't you going to
absorb my magic and health?
Ow!
Hey, Kazuma, don't interfere!
This is a battle between
a lich and a goddess!
I won't let her absorb
my strength that easily!
Look, we're not getting
anywhere, so let her absorb it!
Konosuba.
Acquisition complete!
Um, Master Aqua?
It's all right. You can
let go of my hand now.
Actually, when you touch me,
it makes my hand tingle,
so I appreciate it
if you would let go of it.
Master Aqua?
My hand is starting to burn.
Master Aqua, I'm going to
disappear! I'm disappearing!
Ow!
What are you
taking advantage of the moment to do?
You're so mean.
Is it just my imagination
or does Wiz look kind of see-through?
Excuse me!
Is Miss Wiz here?
Konosuba.
This is the place?
Not bad! Yes, not bad at all!
This should be a fitting
place for me to live!
I heard that this originally was
an aristocrat's villa.
But the landlord is certainly generous,
allowing us to live here as a
reward if we can exorcise it.
Wiz is apparently known as a
famous magician in our city,
so people often bring
cases like these to her.
With this, we can make it
through the winter without worry!
Like they say, "make the
best of a bad situation".
I really admire myself.
But according to the landlord,
spirits reappeared instantly no matter
how many times they were exorcised.
Leave it to me!
I am a goddess and an arch priest!
You could call me an anti-undead expert!
I see it!
There was a child born in this mansion
to an aristocrat who made a move on
his maid, partly in fun, and that
illegitimate child was confined here.
The aristocrat had a weak
constitution, when he died from illness,
the mother of the child
went missing as well.
The girl remained in the
mansion and succumbed to the same illness
as her father, passing away
at a young age.
I really want to ask how you
knew the setting in such detail.
That will take care of
the cleaning for now.
We've decided the room arrangements
and we've carried in our luggage,
so all we need is to wait for night time.
No surprise that it's dusty.
The girl's name was
Anna Filante Estheroid.
Her favorite things were stuffed dolls,
and tales of adventurers' journeys.
But don't worry. This
spirit is not a bad girl.
She may be a child, but she appears to
like things that are a bit grown-up.
She enjoys sweet, hard drinks.
Okay, everyone is free to do
as they please from now on.
Call out as soon as
an evil spirit shows up.
Dismissed!
This is great! Having my own
room is a wonderful thing!
I'm sure the evil spirits
will be gone by morning.
I know Aqua well.
She isn't the type to let evil spirits
do whatever they like in her own house.
She is an arch priest
and goddess after all.
What?
What's wrong? Hey, Aqua,
what happened? Are you all right?
Kazuma!
This is super expensive
alcohol that I've been saving.
I was looking forward to taking
leisurely sips of it after my bath.
But when I came back to my room,
as you can see, it was empty!
I see. Goodnight then. See you tomorrow.
This is the work of evil spirits!
I'm going to go look around the mansion,
and strike down any
spirits that catch my eye!
Show yourselves!
Turn Undead!
Turn Undead!
Turn Undead! Nature's Beauty!
Turn Undead!
Turn Undead!
I'm going to go to the bathroom.
Scary!
Was there a doll like that in this room?
It can't be!
A cliched development
like this can't be happening!
Aqua! Master Aqua!
Scary! This is super scary! What is this?
Aqua, save m
Don't scare me like that, Megumin!
I nearly wet myself.
I'm the one who should be saying that!
Why did you come barging into this room?
I thought Aqua was coming back.
I could ask you the same.
Why are you in Aqua's room?
Well, there were dolls
moving around all over the place.
So, I was going to have Aqua protect me,
and thought we could go
to the bathroom together.
You too?
Aqua is probably still out exorcising
spirits in the mansion, isn't she?
Is she?
I'm sure Darkness is with her then.
Yes, despite how she is,
she is a crusader.
Hey, Megumin,
look over there and cover
your ears for a minute.
I'm going to borrow your veranda for a
Hey, what are you doing? Let go of me.
If you don't, my pants and the carpet
in this room are going
to be in big trouble.
I won't let you do it. How can
you relieve yourself alone?
Aren't we allies?
Wherever we go, bathroom
or otherwise, we go together!
Let go of me! Don't emphasize our bond
as allies only at times like these!
Didn't you say crimson demons
don't use the bathroom?
If you want, there is an
empty bottle lying over there!
You just blurted out
something outrageous!
What are you suggesting me
to do with that empty bottle?
I won't let you do it! I can
at least shake you from behind
while you go to the bathroom.
Konosuba.
Kazuma, are you there?
I'm here.
Are you really there?
I'm here!
You are really there for me, right?
I am here! I'm right here.
and I won't leave you,
so hurry up and go!
This is a little embarrassing.
Could you sing a song or
something in a loud voice?
Why do I have to sing in the middle
of the night in front of a bathroom?
Hey, Megumin, hurry up!
Please don't rush me like that!
I know you're in a tough spot too!
It's true that both our
bladders are in a tough spot,
but we've got a bigger
problem closing in!
I can't go if you rush me like that!
It's no good!
I can't wait any longer!
Hurry up!
How can anyone have
so little common sense?
You at least got half way
through, so you're fine!
What are you talking about?
Crimson demons don't use the bathroom.
You are saying that now?
I'm already at my limit here!
I thought that might
happen, so I brought this.
Please use it.
No, thanks!
I can't hold it anymore.
At this point, I'd sooner use the vase.
Darkness blacker than
black and darker than dark.
I beseech you to combine
with my deep crimson.
What are you chanting?
You want to blow away
this mansion along with them?
We will just have to go for it!
Megumin, run once I open the door!
I will use the Drain Touch
skill I just learned,
and absorb the magic of
as many dolls as I can!
Bring it on, you evil spirits!
I will get our goddess on you all later!
Aqua, are you okay?
Konosuba.
Since you exorcised the evil spirits,
you get a special reward.
This was posted as a crusade quest,
but even the guild was
bothered by how new spirits
settled in, no matter
how many spirits were exorcised.
So I hear.
Why did so many
evil spirits gather there?
About that,
there is a community
graveyard near that mansion, right?
A community graveyard?
The place where we first met Wiz?
Someone apparently erected
a massive barrier
as a prank or something.
So the spirits had nowhere to go
and settled in the vacant mansion instead.
Excuse us for a moment.
Hey, you know what is
going on, don't you? Say it.
Yes. You remember how
we undertook exorcising
of the graveyard in Wiz's stead before?
But constantly going all the way
to the graveyard was a huge pain.
So, I figured if I took away
their graveyard, the spirits' home,
they would eventually
disperse and leave. So, I did.
Talk about stirring up
trouble and taking the credit!
This is obviously wrong.
We will not accept the special
reward from the guild, got it?
Yes.
Konosuba.
I thought for sure it was
all Aqua's wild delusions.
Who would have thought it was all true?
Hello, Mr. Kazuma.
Are you cleaning the gravestone?
Isn't it great that you've been
allowed to live here?
It's a life-saver that the landlord
here is such a nice person.
We caused you a lot of trouble too, Wiz.
No. I personally think
this was for the best.
I'm sure she won't be lonely anymore.
I'm sure.
I'm begging you, please
don't cause any more mischief.
Well, I need to attend to the shop,
so I'll be heading back for the day.
Say hello to the others for me.
Yes, thank you for coming.
Kazuma! Lunch is ready, so hurry back!
If you don't, your
long-awaited lunch will get cold!
With this, I finally obtained
the down-to-earth lifestyle
I most desired.
Got it, I'm on my way!
Aqua, we're out of
wood for the fireplace.
Oh, then toss Kazuma's tracksuit
over there onto the fire!
Don't do that!
I told you not to burn
my precious memories!
(Episode 9: God's Blessing
On This Wonderful Shop!)