Merli. Sapere Aude (2019) s01e08 Episode Script
El batalló sagrat de Tebes
1
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AN ORIGINAL MOVISTAR+ SERIES
Next station: Arc de Triomf.
I can't believe it!
You all look like marble statues.
I'm asking you to think about it.
Is it fair that Messi earns
5,000 times more than a professor?
It's not a complaint, it's a question.
Maybe what we should be asking ourselves
is whether he deserves it.
That's it.
Fucking deserves it.
Aristotle claimed that justice means
giving someone what they deserve.
In other words,
are professors not getting justice?
I think so, because you teachers have
a great responsibility towards society.
Soccer players simply entertain.
If you all think like that guy,
you'll pass my class.
Come on, you do the talking.
I don't feel like working,
I don't get paid enough.
I think soccer players earn more
because they generate more wealth.
Hmm.
Oh, okay.
So I don't generate wealth, right?
Even though I share
my enormous knowledge with you all.
So that you can find a good job
in the future and avoid world wars.
I still don't know why I'm not sponsored
by a brand of whisky.
But hold on a second, we're saying
- that Messi's talent isn't inspiring.
- Rai, it's not the same.
But why not?
He got far thanks to his own talent
and his own effort.
It's just a lot of people don't like him
because he's rich, that's all.
Right.
Right.
In democratic societies,
where equal opportunities
are supposed to exist and drive,
there's a tendency not to tolerate
the slightest privilege.
Therefore, it's easy for resentment
to propagate
and envy and comparisons to grow.
Envy always appears
in the face of other people's happiness.
I, for instance,
not only want to be happy.
I also need other people not to be.
Today I'm on a roll.
In conclusion
Do we have the life we deserve?
Do you think life is fair?
I love her, okay?
But is she half-crazy or is it just me?
She looked a bit drunk, don't you think?
- What? Dude, she wasn't drunk.
- Huh?
Your attention, please!
Please, don't leave yet.
This Saturday, I'm throwing a party
at my place and you are all invited.
You don't have to bring anything.
Drinks, open bar, food,
everything is on me.
Oh, yeah!
I hope all of you come dressed up
looking fine,
with a touch of red and wearing a bow tie.
Yeah, right. A bow tie.
I'm not wearing a fucking bow tie.
- You look so nice!
- Hi.
Hey. Is everyone already here?
No, Rai is coming in last. Of course,
the rich prince is royally late.
Oh, look who's here.
Well, well!
- The French American coalition.
- Hey!
Ooh. Hi, Pol, bonne nuit. How are you?
- How are you? Bonne nuit.
- How are you doing?
- How are you?
- Good, you?
- I'm good.
- It's so fun!
Hey, handsome!
- I'll be right back.
- Okay.
Hello, hello.
I'm glad you decided to come.
We didn't know whether to come or not.
We don't know anyone.
It's Barcelona's queen of the night.
- And Venezuela, my darling.
- Ah
- You're looking good tonight.
- Bruno Mm.
I bet there are more than
ten bedrooms up there.
Yeah, yeah. This house is huge.
Actually, I've been up in Rai's room
and it's crazy.
Come on.
If you break anything, you'll pay for it.
Everyone to the garden!
Yeah!
Hey, hey, hey!
Come on!
A freakin' beautiful pool!
Nice pool.
- Wow.
- Oh, man.
Wow, nice catering.
How much do you think he paid
for all this stuff?
Mm. I don't know, but this is delicious.
I have to admit
that croquetas are a pending vital issue
in the United States of America.
I think you are great, Amy.
Thank you. Yeah. A lot of people say that.
Mm-hmm, and she's pretty.
Yes. And you are, too.
What's this?
Here you go, love.
Merci.
You gonna say anything? Do I look nice?
Yeah, yeah, you look nice.
Hey, I want to talk to you
about something, Bruno.
Don't take this the wrong way.
But I need to know
what your intentions are tonight.
Why? We are at a party, right?
Right. Because I want to have a good time.
You get it, right?
Relax, I'll do my own thing.
There are guys who are more interesting
than you here.
And now you're upset?
Okay. Bye, Bruno.
So, already had a fight with your ex?
He's not my ex!
Rai, I see that Minerva decided
against the party in the end.
Not at all, dude.
It's her grandmother is very sick.
She wasn't in the mood,
but believe me, she'll be here.
I'm not going. I already told Rai.
He told me your future depends
on this party, okay?
And I think he was being serious.
Tell Rai
I'll see him in class on Monday.
W-wait! He's got a present for you!
What present?
Tell me or I won't go to the party.
The lady is dead,
the apartment is empty
but the flowers are still there.
They'll dry up and die.
She took such good care of them.
Listen, this afternoon, when you went out,
did you go shopping?
Oh, yes. I bought an anti-slip mat
for the shower.
At our advanced age,
we can't risk breaking a hip.
- But our mat doesn't even slip at all.
- Just in case.
All right, not just that.
Look, Glòria, in the bed
It's boring.
What?
Yes, well, we could maybe try
in the shower.
You know
- What?
- Nothing.
We have to make the best of our time.
Yes?
Why are you here?
What do you mean? You called me.
I did?
You don't remember?
Never mind.
You can't even read or stand up.
Oh.
Listen to that.
Did you come here to insult me
in my own home?
No, I came here to help you
because you asked me.
But all of a sudden I get here
and I don't know, I annoy you.
Make up your mind.
Excuse me. Excuse me, madam.
Come on, sit down.
Sit down, I'll get you a drink.
No, I don't want anything, thank you.
Come on, are you going to let me
drink my glass of cava alone, huh?
- María, please
- Or wine.
- Red wine's better. Yes.
- María
I've got all different colours of glasses.
I'm telling you I don't want anything!
Why would I care what you want?
This is my house and I can do
whatever the fuck I want!
What are you doing?
Fuck, María
Fuck. María!
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Press. Press it down.
What?
- Don't call an ambulance.
- Press there.
Will you shut the fuck up!
- Hang up!
- Just press down.
Oh, my God, no! I didn't vote for Trump!
- Oh, come on, don't lie.
- Please, girl.
- What?
- Oh, my God! I didn't!
- That's a big surprise!
- But I thought you liked guns.
Surprise? A major surprise.
You guys have no idea
about the ins and outs
of American politics.
What you have here
is a real freaking drama.
- That's going too far.
- Come on. Drama?
I love American Politics, okay?
The Super Tuesday
and the Ohio Caucus.
Iowa.
- Well Yes.
- Well, they sound the same.
Anyway, they are annoying.
I'll explain it to you.
- Okay.
- What's that "super chewday" thing?
"Super chewday."
Shit. Look at those two flirting.
Dude, is Etienne handsome?
- Sure.
- You hooked up?
You don't tell me anything.
Of course, people like you
recognise each other, right?
I mean, you have a connection, right?
Why do you say "people like you?"
I'm not gay.
Well, right, but you're into everything.
So, then it's easy for you to know
when a guy likes other guys.
Yeah, that's why I noticed you.
Oh, careful, be careful.
There's Minerva!
Attention, please!
I have a very special present for Minerva!
Do you know what you can do
with your trip to Argentina?
- Shove it up your ass, Rai.
- Henry!
She wouldn't come
until I told her your plan, Rai.
Do you think you can buy me?
Come on, let's cool down
a bit, Minerva, okay?
You send me your private chauffeur
and try to buy me
with a free plane ticket to Argentina?
Unbelievable.
Spaniards believe we, Latin Americans,
will crawl across the floor
for a thousand Euros.
- In his face.
- Yeah, that's insulting.
Do you think I hadn't thought of going?
That you gave me the great idea
of visiting my grandmother?
You Spaniards are so condescending.
Of course! They discovered us.
Exactly. But they don't realise
we already existed before they arrived.
And they forget that they also have
their own problems and dictatorships.
Ángel. Caracas.
Minerva. Buenos Aires.
You can buy me a drink
but not a paid trip, okay?
And now she kisses him?
Fuck, to hell with all of it!
Wait! Hold up!
Biel, wait up.
What's wrong?
Shit! Minerva doesn't accept the gift,
but then she kisses him.
But why does everything come so easily
for some people?
Love, m-money, school.
T-That posh guy will pass all his classes
like it's nothing
and I'll have to drop out!
What the fuck are you talking about?
I'm useless at philosophy!
What's even the point?
Shit. Biel, come on,
don't be such a nihilist.
See? Nihilist!
What the fuck does nihilist even mean?
You know, Rai has problems, too.
Yeah, a 2,000-square-metre problem!
And without any effort,
he gets the girl who's the most
You like Minerva.
I like her a bit.
Pol, I'm telling you
because you are my best friend in class.
I can trust you.
And I envy your talent for philosophy.
I just don't understand
how you and Rai are such good friends.
He makes me sick!
He's not even handsome! Look, look.
Just look at these babies, blue eyes.
She doesn't even notice.
It sucks to be invisible.
Do you know where I am?
This is psych ward.
They'll keep you 24 hours for observation.
And what the fuck do they want to observe?
What are they,
pre-Socratic doctors or what?
At least you haven't lost
your sense of humour.
You've put me in here with the wackos.
If you leave, I'll call the doctors
or the police or whoever I have to.
This is how you treat your mentor.
I earned my job myself. I owe you nothing.
You don't remember.
My conversation with the previous dean
to sell him on my best student, huh?
We opened up a spot for you
in the department
the day after you got your doctorate.
And I didn't deserve it?
No, tell me, because if I didn't,
I'd like to know.
Yes, but I gave you the final little push.
And now you are locking me up here
like a rat!
You can't teach when you're like this.
You'll take a sick leave on Monday,
and I'll talk to your students.
Ha! You're becoming more and more
like Eve Harrington.
María you're an alcoholic.
If you admit you need help,
you know where to find me.
Wanna see my weenie?
I'll cut it off. You fucking idiot!
Have you seen Oti?
No, I haven't seen her in a while.
All right. All right.
Hey, so this guy, Rai,
the Hispanic-Catalan
I don't know, if you listen to him
talking, it's like he's, uh,
the owner of a textile colony
from last century.
I don't know, it's like the rich guy
invites the poor people over once a year
to eat chicken.
But I have to admit
that the chicken, mm, so good.
What are you saying?
That I should accept the gift? Is that it?
One should take advantage
of strokes of luck.
Uh, Ángel, I don't want gifts.
Oh, I know.
But some buses only come through town
once in a lifetime.
Oti?
Oti?
What? What the fuck are you doing?
- Shut up or they'll hear you!
- Right, fuck, yeah, but
I felt like taking a bath
in a rich person's bathroom.
Relax, chill out.
- Go, and don't say anything to Rai.
- Fine, fine.
Fuck, Oti.
Oh, my God!
I almost died!
It's okay, you're alive.
Oh, my God.
- You already finished it?
- Hmm.
Cool, right?
Look.
I'm going to accept your gift.
You don't have to, Minerva,
you were right
But only as a loan, okay?
I'm going to pay you back
every cent. Deal?
What do you say?
I just got very horny.
But after what you said earlier
What?
If we were to hook up now
it'll look like Spain
wants to fuck Argentina.
Well, I'll get on top then
and Argentina will fuck Spain.
I haven't seen him for hours.
Can't find him, huh?
- Who?
- Talking about Rai.
Yeah. Yeah, right, because we are friends.
Yeah.
Fuck, Bruno, if I had known
You wouldn't have invited me. Right?
Enough, okay? I don't want to do this.
I know where he is.
But I don't think you should go there.
Dude, I told you
you shouldn't go there.
Do you think I don't know
they're together?
This isn't the first time they've fucked.
All right. Perfect.
You love that I saw that, right?
You wanted me to go in there and see it.
It's all because you're jealous,
always chasing me.
Me? Chasing you?
Yeah, always after me,
always pestering me, Bruno.
You came here because you wanted
to watch me suffer, right?
You love that Minerva's here
and now they're fucking.
Now there's nothing standing
between me and you.
Thank God you came here
to have a good time.
Do you really think that acting like this
will get you anywhere with me?
What do you gain by provoking me, huh?
You think you're like your father?
Your father would feel sorry
I went too far.
But I've never been in love with you.
The neighbour from the first floor
is very nice, isn't he?
Yes, why?
I'll be right back.
Yeah!
Turn it on!
Where are you going?
I'm leaving.
Are you stealing from me?
You're seriously telling me
you're gonna miss two bottles of whisky?
Man, but this is the good stuff.
Go fuck yourself, Rai.
Take 'em.
Here, keep your fucking bottles.
I'm done with you.
I'm done with all your eccentricities.
I fucking love that Minerva blew up on you
in front of everyone.
You don't know how much I enjoyed that.
You don't realise,
but all this shit you're doing
I mean, your whole life
is fucking obscene.
If I want to throw a party
at my mansion I do it.
If I want to fuck my aunt, I fuck her.
And if I want to have friends, I buy them.
But you can't go yet.
You'll miss the best part.
What's he doing?
Who wants a vintage scooter?
I do!
I fucking hate this son of a bitch.
Calm down, calm down,
calm down, calm down.
If you want it, you have to earn it.
What are we supposed to do?
Very simple.
Look at the bottom of the pool.
There are a lot of stones at the bottom,
but only one of them has the letter "M".
"M" of "motor scooter."
But you can only participate
if you jump in the water butt naked.
Ooh!
Come on, man, he expects me to
What? What the hell?
You're already getting naked?
Dude, what are you doing?
You don't have a driving license.
Well I'll sell it, man.
Shit! Come on, it's fucking freezing!
Come on, it's fucking freezing!
All right. Countdown.
Five, four, three, two, one.
Everybody's bringing
Flowers for Peggy ♪
Flowers for Peggy ♪
But when she opens up the door ♪
Everyone's been claiming
Things are heavy ♪
But our Peggy ♪
Doesn't say a word ♪
Her next-door neighbour's
Always talking about the war ♪
He says you should have seen that girl
When she was 24 ♪
And now I know ♪
Why everybody's bringing ♪
Everybody's bringing ♪
Everybody's bringing ♪
Everybody's bringing ♪
Bringing flowers for Peggy ♪
What you did wasn't very ethical.
So do you want me to confess
in front of everyone that I cheated?
You bastard, you hit me in my weak spot.
You know that, a few years ago,
I had to sell my scooter
to pay for the electric bill?
And now you're dangling one
right in front of my face.
I have integrity, and you know that.
Pol, I am not buying your friendship.
We were already friends, right?
Stop! Stop in the name of love!
But how can you accept this scooter?
You! It's insulting.
It's also insulting not to accept it.
But why do you have those arms
and those pecs like
the Discobolus of Myron?
And why are you taking my scooter?
All right, get on, Mr. Caracas,
before I change my mind.
Wait, I'll go get my shirt first.
Don't you move!
No. Wait. Hold on.
Now we can be twins.
Okay.
- May I hold on to you?
- Of course.
Hold on tighter, man. Like this.
Together, in the front line.
Like two soldiers
from the Sacred Band of Thebes.
What sacred band?
- What are you talking about?
- Come on!
Vidal, I'll be off sick for a week,
but I'll be back in time
to give the Master's classes.
No, you're no longer
doing the Master class.
Oh, I'm not?
Then who the fuck is teaching
in the fucking Master class?
Stop with the drama. It's pathetic.
Accuse me directly of stealing your spot.
Okay. You stole my fucking spot,
you goddamn thief.
I didn't steal anything.
It's Vidal who doesn't want you.
He offered it to you, you bitch.
How many times have you fucked
that little fascist?
Look, I'm not going to refuse
teaching Master classes
out of loyalty to an alcoholic
who takes her thermos of magic potion
to class.
When you finally have kids,
they'll hate you.
I can't stand you any longer.
I'm going to ask to be moved
to another office.
You deny the evidence,
you're being completely idiotic,
and you disgust me, so I'm leaving
All right. I have a drinking problem.
And what do you suggest, huh?
Besides taking all my classes.
Locking me up
with a bunch of sexual degenerates.
In the hospital, they told me
about a support group.
Oh! My name is María and I'm an alcoholic?
We're not in small town Minnesota.
I refuse to join a group
of fucked up people.
I still have my dignity.
My foundations are solid.
Yes, go on, you've got what you wanted:
your Master class and your own office.
Don't ever treat me like a child again!
I treat you like a sick person.
And now I'm leaving.
And, if that's okay with you,
I'll slam the door.
May I slam the door?
Every day you get more like me!
Hey, listen.
"Philosophical discussion
ends in a violent shoot out.
In a bar in the Austrian" Come on.
"In a bar of the Austrian town
of Feldkirch,
two women were having a heated argument
- over the life of the philosopher
- Two!
Ludwig Wittgenstein".
- Wittgenstein.
- "The debate got heated
when they talked about
the fortune of the philosopher
- Enough.
- as Wittgenstein gave it up
in order to lead
a simple and humble life."
- Amazing. Wow.
- Yes, I knew that.
"One of the women took out a gun
and shot it twice.
The victim is in hospital
in critical condition."
- Amazing. I'm gonna frame this.
- Make copies for all of us.
- Hey, what's up?
- Hey.
Hey.
You're finally going to Argentina
to see your grandma?
Yes. I accepted the gift only as a loan.
I'm glad to hear it.
Your Rai, always full of surprises.
- My Rai?
- Mm-hmm.
Dude. No one belongs to anyone, okay?
So, did you have time to clean up
after the party?
I have to get the stones
from the bottom of the pool, okay?
- Yeah.
- Who's helping me?
Pol and Minerva should do it.
They're in debt to you.
They'll be your slaves forever.
Good morning!
Where's Bolaño?
Let's quiet down, please.
Does anyone know why there's no
teacher's lounge in this building anymore?
Hmm, lack of space?
No. There was a teacher's lounge,
but nobody wanted to clean it or change
the filter in the coffee machine.
We all allowed the space to deteriorate
and now we have to buy our coffee at cafe.
I am telling you this
so that you see that just because we are
Philosophy lecturers
and give ourselves medals
for thinking deeply about things,
that doesn't stop us
from behaving shamefully.
We don't speak much amongst ourselves.
I, for instance, only have one friend.
María Bolaño.
She's now on sick leave, for the moment,
I'll take over her classes.
I would applaud, but I can't.
Aren't you on sick leave?
My mental health is intact,
that's good enough.
Sure.
Or do I dedicate myself
to laying bricks for a living?
María
Why don't you stay?
You can help me by writing
whatever comes into my head on the board.
You know I'd do it myself if I could.
No, thank you.
Voilà.
Well, well. Philosophy's great hope.
You okay?
What happened to your arm?
Hmm, I tried to hit a CIS pollster,
but I had the bad luck that he defended
himself with his aluminium folder.
And you? Why are you here?
I came to tell you
I didn't like your behaviour.
You might consider not turning your class
into a side show.
You're not doing yourself any favours.
Wait, wait, hold on.
Repeat that, because this is hilarious.
Are you really trying to scold me
right now?
I'm just here to tell you that everyone's
beginning to wonder if you're okay.
People are starting to talk.
Let them fucking talk.
I mean, what makes you think you know me?
How dare you talk to me like that?
You know,
I'm not your high school teacher.
I'm your college professor.
Yeah, but I'm your student
and I've seen your tits.
And made sure you were safe
when you're completely wasted.
So, yes, I think I know you.
And what gives you the right
to lecture me, you asshole?
You're the one who didn't grade my paper,
who played the folder trick on me
and this whole year has
Oh, my God, here we go again
with the folders trick.
Have you been drinking?
A matter of fact, no,
because I can't open the bottle.
There you go.
If you take one more drink, I think
your sick leave will last for years.
And I won't be able
to come to your classes.
Oh, how sad for you.
Well, for your information,
my golden years as a professor
are long gone.
I am tired all ready.
I used to have energy, now I don't.
And I'm sorry that I am not your Merlí.
The hell you're not.
Of course you are.
I've known it since the first day
you walked in class making a joke.
And you are, because every morning
I wake up wanting to come to your class.
And because I'm certain
that when I'm learning from you,
I'll, one day, teach my own students.
Don't you get it?
That's why I need you
to look after yourself.
Because I've already lost one teacher.
- Less than a minute.
- Because you distracted me.
Do you know what I was thinking about
down there?
What?
That I would live in this house
with you and Minerva.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
Not bad. A little student suite.
Why did you give me the scooter?
Dude, for the first time in my life
I get to choose what I want to do.
Well, what I want to do,
what I want to study
and give any presents I feel like
and choose my friends.
I also have to want to be your friend.
It goes both ways.
Come on, haven't you already proven
that we're friends?
I have proven way more than that.
Knowing what I want
you give me a fucking scooter,
you invite me over to your place
The normal thing would be
to keep your distance.
Okay, things got out of hand,
but I didn't know you would be into me.
You know what?
Twenty-five hundred years ago,
you and I would have fought
with the Sacred Band of Thebes.
It was an army made up of a 150 couples.
They were warriors,
and they gave it all in battle,
because they were friends and lovers.
Bravest ones.
Wow, I love it.
Dude, I love it, it's awesome.
Where did you get that from?
I like reading about ancient history.
A-And what if a soldier
failed one of them?
Hm?
Imagine if, uh, the soldier doesn't defend
the other properly
- and ends up fatally injured.
- Hmm. Mm-hmm.
What then?
Then he kissed him goodbye.
But we are not in Thebes 2,000 years ago.
No, no, of course not.
I know you like giving presents,
but I don't want consolation prizes.
You get it, right, Casamiquela?
Understood, Rubio.
Hey
about the, uh, motor scooter
you've suddenly acquired.
Can you explain it?
Oh, you noticed.
- I got a new scooter.
- Mm-hmm.
Let's say it fell out of the sky.
Yeah.
You found a magic lamp,
you rubbed it and the genie appeared.
Rai.
It's almost insulting.
Although don't look a gift horse
Can you imagine having that much money
and being able
to just give people presents?
Rai gives away scooters,
and you water geraniums, Dad.
Generosity isn't a class thing.
Yes. We all do what we can.
Uh Are you, uh
Are you a couple or what's going on?
I think it's better if I don't spend
too much time with him.
Men is not something I know much about,
but I think that, deep down
I guess it must be
the same as with women, right?
Well, not exactly the same,
because we don't have the same thing
between our legs.
I'm sorry, just kidding, just kidding.
No.
- I love it when you say things like that.
- Mm.
We haven't really talked that much.
Have we, Dad?
No.
One step at a time.
We don't have to talk about
every little thing all at once.
Ooh!
NETFLIX PRESENTS
AN ORIGINAL MOVISTAR+ SERIES
Next station: Arc de Triomf.
I can't believe it!
You all look like marble statues.
I'm asking you to think about it.
Is it fair that Messi earns
5,000 times more than a professor?
It's not a complaint, it's a question.
Maybe what we should be asking ourselves
is whether he deserves it.
That's it.
Fucking deserves it.
Aristotle claimed that justice means
giving someone what they deserve.
In other words,
are professors not getting justice?
I think so, because you teachers have
a great responsibility towards society.
Soccer players simply entertain.
If you all think like that guy,
you'll pass my class.
Come on, you do the talking.
I don't feel like working,
I don't get paid enough.
I think soccer players earn more
because they generate more wealth.
Hmm.
Oh, okay.
So I don't generate wealth, right?
Even though I share
my enormous knowledge with you all.
So that you can find a good job
in the future and avoid world wars.
I still don't know why I'm not sponsored
by a brand of whisky.
But hold on a second, we're saying
- that Messi's talent isn't inspiring.
- Rai, it's not the same.
But why not?
He got far thanks to his own talent
and his own effort.
It's just a lot of people don't like him
because he's rich, that's all.
Right.
Right.
In democratic societies,
where equal opportunities
are supposed to exist and drive,
there's a tendency not to tolerate
the slightest privilege.
Therefore, it's easy for resentment
to propagate
and envy and comparisons to grow.
Envy always appears
in the face of other people's happiness.
I, for instance,
not only want to be happy.
I also need other people not to be.
Today I'm on a roll.
In conclusion
Do we have the life we deserve?
Do you think life is fair?
I love her, okay?
But is she half-crazy or is it just me?
She looked a bit drunk, don't you think?
- What? Dude, she wasn't drunk.
- Huh?
Your attention, please!
Please, don't leave yet.
This Saturday, I'm throwing a party
at my place and you are all invited.
You don't have to bring anything.
Drinks, open bar, food,
everything is on me.
Oh, yeah!
I hope all of you come dressed up
looking fine,
with a touch of red and wearing a bow tie.
Yeah, right. A bow tie.
I'm not wearing a fucking bow tie.
- You look so nice!
- Hi.
Hey. Is everyone already here?
No, Rai is coming in last. Of course,
the rich prince is royally late.
Oh, look who's here.
Well, well!
- The French American coalition.
- Hey!
Ooh. Hi, Pol, bonne nuit. How are you?
- How are you? Bonne nuit.
- How are you doing?
- How are you?
- Good, you?
- I'm good.
- It's so fun!
Hey, handsome!
- I'll be right back.
- Okay.
Hello, hello.
I'm glad you decided to come.
We didn't know whether to come or not.
We don't know anyone.
It's Barcelona's queen of the night.
- And Venezuela, my darling.
- Ah
- You're looking good tonight.
- Bruno Mm.
I bet there are more than
ten bedrooms up there.
Yeah, yeah. This house is huge.
Actually, I've been up in Rai's room
and it's crazy.
Come on.
If you break anything, you'll pay for it.
Everyone to the garden!
Yeah!
Hey, hey, hey!
Come on!
A freakin' beautiful pool!
Nice pool.
- Wow.
- Oh, man.
Wow, nice catering.
How much do you think he paid
for all this stuff?
Mm. I don't know, but this is delicious.
I have to admit
that croquetas are a pending vital issue
in the United States of America.
I think you are great, Amy.
Thank you. Yeah. A lot of people say that.
Mm-hmm, and she's pretty.
Yes. And you are, too.
What's this?
Here you go, love.
Merci.
You gonna say anything? Do I look nice?
Yeah, yeah, you look nice.
Hey, I want to talk to you
about something, Bruno.
Don't take this the wrong way.
But I need to know
what your intentions are tonight.
Why? We are at a party, right?
Right. Because I want to have a good time.
You get it, right?
Relax, I'll do my own thing.
There are guys who are more interesting
than you here.
And now you're upset?
Okay. Bye, Bruno.
So, already had a fight with your ex?
He's not my ex!
Rai, I see that Minerva decided
against the party in the end.
Not at all, dude.
It's her grandmother is very sick.
She wasn't in the mood,
but believe me, she'll be here.
I'm not going. I already told Rai.
He told me your future depends
on this party, okay?
And I think he was being serious.
Tell Rai
I'll see him in class on Monday.
W-wait! He's got a present for you!
What present?
Tell me or I won't go to the party.
The lady is dead,
the apartment is empty
but the flowers are still there.
They'll dry up and die.
She took such good care of them.
Listen, this afternoon, when you went out,
did you go shopping?
Oh, yes. I bought an anti-slip mat
for the shower.
At our advanced age,
we can't risk breaking a hip.
- But our mat doesn't even slip at all.
- Just in case.
All right, not just that.
Look, Glòria, in the bed
It's boring.
What?
Yes, well, we could maybe try
in the shower.
You know
- What?
- Nothing.
We have to make the best of our time.
Yes?
Why are you here?
What do you mean? You called me.
I did?
You don't remember?
Never mind.
You can't even read or stand up.
Oh.
Listen to that.
Did you come here to insult me
in my own home?
No, I came here to help you
because you asked me.
But all of a sudden I get here
and I don't know, I annoy you.
Make up your mind.
Excuse me. Excuse me, madam.
Come on, sit down.
Sit down, I'll get you a drink.
No, I don't want anything, thank you.
Come on, are you going to let me
drink my glass of cava alone, huh?
- María, please
- Or wine.
- Red wine's better. Yes.
- María
I've got all different colours of glasses.
I'm telling you I don't want anything!
Why would I care what you want?
This is my house and I can do
whatever the fuck I want!
What are you doing?
Fuck, María
Fuck. María!
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
Press. Press it down.
What?
- Don't call an ambulance.
- Press there.
Will you shut the fuck up!
- Hang up!
- Just press down.
Oh, my God, no! I didn't vote for Trump!
- Oh, come on, don't lie.
- Please, girl.
- What?
- Oh, my God! I didn't!
- That's a big surprise!
- But I thought you liked guns.
Surprise? A major surprise.
You guys have no idea
about the ins and outs
of American politics.
What you have here
is a real freaking drama.
- That's going too far.
- Come on. Drama?
I love American Politics, okay?
The Super Tuesday
and the Ohio Caucus.
Iowa.
- Well Yes.
- Well, they sound the same.
Anyway, they are annoying.
I'll explain it to you.
- Okay.
- What's that "super chewday" thing?
"Super chewday."
Shit. Look at those two flirting.
Dude, is Etienne handsome?
- Sure.
- You hooked up?
You don't tell me anything.
Of course, people like you
recognise each other, right?
I mean, you have a connection, right?
Why do you say "people like you?"
I'm not gay.
Well, right, but you're into everything.
So, then it's easy for you to know
when a guy likes other guys.
Yeah, that's why I noticed you.
Oh, careful, be careful.
There's Minerva!
Attention, please!
I have a very special present for Minerva!
Do you know what you can do
with your trip to Argentina?
- Shove it up your ass, Rai.
- Henry!
She wouldn't come
until I told her your plan, Rai.
Do you think you can buy me?
Come on, let's cool down
a bit, Minerva, okay?
You send me your private chauffeur
and try to buy me
with a free plane ticket to Argentina?
Unbelievable.
Spaniards believe we, Latin Americans,
will crawl across the floor
for a thousand Euros.
- In his face.
- Yeah, that's insulting.
Do you think I hadn't thought of going?
That you gave me the great idea
of visiting my grandmother?
You Spaniards are so condescending.
Of course! They discovered us.
Exactly. But they don't realise
we already existed before they arrived.
And they forget that they also have
their own problems and dictatorships.
Ángel. Caracas.
Minerva. Buenos Aires.
You can buy me a drink
but not a paid trip, okay?
And now she kisses him?
Fuck, to hell with all of it!
Wait! Hold up!
Biel, wait up.
What's wrong?
Shit! Minerva doesn't accept the gift,
but then she kisses him.
But why does everything come so easily
for some people?
Love, m-money, school.
T-That posh guy will pass all his classes
like it's nothing
and I'll have to drop out!
What the fuck are you talking about?
I'm useless at philosophy!
What's even the point?
Shit. Biel, come on,
don't be such a nihilist.
See? Nihilist!
What the fuck does nihilist even mean?
You know, Rai has problems, too.
Yeah, a 2,000-square-metre problem!
And without any effort,
he gets the girl who's the most
You like Minerva.
I like her a bit.
Pol, I'm telling you
because you are my best friend in class.
I can trust you.
And I envy your talent for philosophy.
I just don't understand
how you and Rai are such good friends.
He makes me sick!
He's not even handsome! Look, look.
Just look at these babies, blue eyes.
She doesn't even notice.
It sucks to be invisible.
Do you know where I am?
This is psych ward.
They'll keep you 24 hours for observation.
And what the fuck do they want to observe?
What are they,
pre-Socratic doctors or what?
At least you haven't lost
your sense of humour.
You've put me in here with the wackos.
If you leave, I'll call the doctors
or the police or whoever I have to.
This is how you treat your mentor.
I earned my job myself. I owe you nothing.
You don't remember.
My conversation with the previous dean
to sell him on my best student, huh?
We opened up a spot for you
in the department
the day after you got your doctorate.
And I didn't deserve it?
No, tell me, because if I didn't,
I'd like to know.
Yes, but I gave you the final little push.
And now you are locking me up here
like a rat!
You can't teach when you're like this.
You'll take a sick leave on Monday,
and I'll talk to your students.
Ha! You're becoming more and more
like Eve Harrington.
María you're an alcoholic.
If you admit you need help,
you know where to find me.
Wanna see my weenie?
I'll cut it off. You fucking idiot!
Have you seen Oti?
No, I haven't seen her in a while.
All right. All right.
Hey, so this guy, Rai,
the Hispanic-Catalan
I don't know, if you listen to him
talking, it's like he's, uh,
the owner of a textile colony
from last century.
I don't know, it's like the rich guy
invites the poor people over once a year
to eat chicken.
But I have to admit
that the chicken, mm, so good.
What are you saying?
That I should accept the gift? Is that it?
One should take advantage
of strokes of luck.
Uh, Ángel, I don't want gifts.
Oh, I know.
But some buses only come through town
once in a lifetime.
Oti?
Oti?
What? What the fuck are you doing?
- Shut up or they'll hear you!
- Right, fuck, yeah, but
I felt like taking a bath
in a rich person's bathroom.
Relax, chill out.
- Go, and don't say anything to Rai.
- Fine, fine.
Fuck, Oti.
Oh, my God!
I almost died!
It's okay, you're alive.
Oh, my God.
- You already finished it?
- Hmm.
Cool, right?
Look.
I'm going to accept your gift.
You don't have to, Minerva,
you were right
But only as a loan, okay?
I'm going to pay you back
every cent. Deal?
What do you say?
I just got very horny.
But after what you said earlier
What?
If we were to hook up now
it'll look like Spain
wants to fuck Argentina.
Well, I'll get on top then
and Argentina will fuck Spain.
I haven't seen him for hours.
Can't find him, huh?
- Who?
- Talking about Rai.
Yeah. Yeah, right, because we are friends.
Yeah.
Fuck, Bruno, if I had known
You wouldn't have invited me. Right?
Enough, okay? I don't want to do this.
I know where he is.
But I don't think you should go there.
Dude, I told you
you shouldn't go there.
Do you think I don't know
they're together?
This isn't the first time they've fucked.
All right. Perfect.
You love that I saw that, right?
You wanted me to go in there and see it.
It's all because you're jealous,
always chasing me.
Me? Chasing you?
Yeah, always after me,
always pestering me, Bruno.
You came here because you wanted
to watch me suffer, right?
You love that Minerva's here
and now they're fucking.
Now there's nothing standing
between me and you.
Thank God you came here
to have a good time.
Do you really think that acting like this
will get you anywhere with me?
What do you gain by provoking me, huh?
You think you're like your father?
Your father would feel sorry
I went too far.
But I've never been in love with you.
The neighbour from the first floor
is very nice, isn't he?
Yes, why?
I'll be right back.
Yeah!
Turn it on!
Where are you going?
I'm leaving.
Are you stealing from me?
You're seriously telling me
you're gonna miss two bottles of whisky?
Man, but this is the good stuff.
Go fuck yourself, Rai.
Take 'em.
Here, keep your fucking bottles.
I'm done with you.
I'm done with all your eccentricities.
I fucking love that Minerva blew up on you
in front of everyone.
You don't know how much I enjoyed that.
You don't realise,
but all this shit you're doing
I mean, your whole life
is fucking obscene.
If I want to throw a party
at my mansion I do it.
If I want to fuck my aunt, I fuck her.
And if I want to have friends, I buy them.
But you can't go yet.
You'll miss the best part.
What's he doing?
Who wants a vintage scooter?
I do!
I fucking hate this son of a bitch.
Calm down, calm down,
calm down, calm down.
If you want it, you have to earn it.
What are we supposed to do?
Very simple.
Look at the bottom of the pool.
There are a lot of stones at the bottom,
but only one of them has the letter "M".
"M" of "motor scooter."
But you can only participate
if you jump in the water butt naked.
Ooh!
Come on, man, he expects me to
What? What the hell?
You're already getting naked?
Dude, what are you doing?
You don't have a driving license.
Well I'll sell it, man.
Shit! Come on, it's fucking freezing!
Come on, it's fucking freezing!
All right. Countdown.
Five, four, three, two, one.
Everybody's bringing
Flowers for Peggy ♪
Flowers for Peggy ♪
But when she opens up the door ♪
Everyone's been claiming
Things are heavy ♪
But our Peggy ♪
Doesn't say a word ♪
Her next-door neighbour's
Always talking about the war ♪
He says you should have seen that girl
When she was 24 ♪
And now I know ♪
Why everybody's bringing ♪
Everybody's bringing ♪
Everybody's bringing ♪
Everybody's bringing ♪
Bringing flowers for Peggy ♪
What you did wasn't very ethical.
So do you want me to confess
in front of everyone that I cheated?
You bastard, you hit me in my weak spot.
You know that, a few years ago,
I had to sell my scooter
to pay for the electric bill?
And now you're dangling one
right in front of my face.
I have integrity, and you know that.
Pol, I am not buying your friendship.
We were already friends, right?
Stop! Stop in the name of love!
But how can you accept this scooter?
You! It's insulting.
It's also insulting not to accept it.
But why do you have those arms
and those pecs like
the Discobolus of Myron?
And why are you taking my scooter?
All right, get on, Mr. Caracas,
before I change my mind.
Wait, I'll go get my shirt first.
Don't you move!
No. Wait. Hold on.
Now we can be twins.
Okay.
- May I hold on to you?
- Of course.
Hold on tighter, man. Like this.
Together, in the front line.
Like two soldiers
from the Sacred Band of Thebes.
What sacred band?
- What are you talking about?
- Come on!
Vidal, I'll be off sick for a week,
but I'll be back in time
to give the Master's classes.
No, you're no longer
doing the Master class.
Oh, I'm not?
Then who the fuck is teaching
in the fucking Master class?
Stop with the drama. It's pathetic.
Accuse me directly of stealing your spot.
Okay. You stole my fucking spot,
you goddamn thief.
I didn't steal anything.
It's Vidal who doesn't want you.
He offered it to you, you bitch.
How many times have you fucked
that little fascist?
Look, I'm not going to refuse
teaching Master classes
out of loyalty to an alcoholic
who takes her thermos of magic potion
to class.
When you finally have kids,
they'll hate you.
I can't stand you any longer.
I'm going to ask to be moved
to another office.
You deny the evidence,
you're being completely idiotic,
and you disgust me, so I'm leaving
All right. I have a drinking problem.
And what do you suggest, huh?
Besides taking all my classes.
Locking me up
with a bunch of sexual degenerates.
In the hospital, they told me
about a support group.
Oh! My name is María and I'm an alcoholic?
We're not in small town Minnesota.
I refuse to join a group
of fucked up people.
I still have my dignity.
My foundations are solid.
Yes, go on, you've got what you wanted:
your Master class and your own office.
Don't ever treat me like a child again!
I treat you like a sick person.
And now I'm leaving.
And, if that's okay with you,
I'll slam the door.
May I slam the door?
Every day you get more like me!
Hey, listen.
"Philosophical discussion
ends in a violent shoot out.
In a bar in the Austrian" Come on.
"In a bar of the Austrian town
of Feldkirch,
two women were having a heated argument
- over the life of the philosopher
- Two!
Ludwig Wittgenstein".
- Wittgenstein.
- "The debate got heated
when they talked about
the fortune of the philosopher
- Enough.
- as Wittgenstein gave it up
in order to lead
a simple and humble life."
- Amazing. Wow.
- Yes, I knew that.
"One of the women took out a gun
and shot it twice.
The victim is in hospital
in critical condition."
- Amazing. I'm gonna frame this.
- Make copies for all of us.
- Hey, what's up?
- Hey.
Hey.
You're finally going to Argentina
to see your grandma?
Yes. I accepted the gift only as a loan.
I'm glad to hear it.
Your Rai, always full of surprises.
- My Rai?
- Mm-hmm.
Dude. No one belongs to anyone, okay?
So, did you have time to clean up
after the party?
I have to get the stones
from the bottom of the pool, okay?
- Yeah.
- Who's helping me?
Pol and Minerva should do it.
They're in debt to you.
They'll be your slaves forever.
Good morning!
Where's Bolaño?
Let's quiet down, please.
Does anyone know why there's no
teacher's lounge in this building anymore?
Hmm, lack of space?
No. There was a teacher's lounge,
but nobody wanted to clean it or change
the filter in the coffee machine.
We all allowed the space to deteriorate
and now we have to buy our coffee at cafe.
I am telling you this
so that you see that just because we are
Philosophy lecturers
and give ourselves medals
for thinking deeply about things,
that doesn't stop us
from behaving shamefully.
We don't speak much amongst ourselves.
I, for instance, only have one friend.
María Bolaño.
She's now on sick leave, for the moment,
I'll take over her classes.
I would applaud, but I can't.
Aren't you on sick leave?
My mental health is intact,
that's good enough.
Sure.
Or do I dedicate myself
to laying bricks for a living?
María
Why don't you stay?
You can help me by writing
whatever comes into my head on the board.
You know I'd do it myself if I could.
No, thank you.
Voilà.
Well, well. Philosophy's great hope.
You okay?
What happened to your arm?
Hmm, I tried to hit a CIS pollster,
but I had the bad luck that he defended
himself with his aluminium folder.
And you? Why are you here?
I came to tell you
I didn't like your behaviour.
You might consider not turning your class
into a side show.
You're not doing yourself any favours.
Wait, wait, hold on.
Repeat that, because this is hilarious.
Are you really trying to scold me
right now?
I'm just here to tell you that everyone's
beginning to wonder if you're okay.
People are starting to talk.
Let them fucking talk.
I mean, what makes you think you know me?
How dare you talk to me like that?
You know,
I'm not your high school teacher.
I'm your college professor.
Yeah, but I'm your student
and I've seen your tits.
And made sure you were safe
when you're completely wasted.
So, yes, I think I know you.
And what gives you the right
to lecture me, you asshole?
You're the one who didn't grade my paper,
who played the folder trick on me
and this whole year has
Oh, my God, here we go again
with the folders trick.
Have you been drinking?
A matter of fact, no,
because I can't open the bottle.
There you go.
If you take one more drink, I think
your sick leave will last for years.
And I won't be able
to come to your classes.
Oh, how sad for you.
Well, for your information,
my golden years as a professor
are long gone.
I am tired all ready.
I used to have energy, now I don't.
And I'm sorry that I am not your Merlí.
The hell you're not.
Of course you are.
I've known it since the first day
you walked in class making a joke.
And you are, because every morning
I wake up wanting to come to your class.
And because I'm certain
that when I'm learning from you,
I'll, one day, teach my own students.
Don't you get it?
That's why I need you
to look after yourself.
Because I've already lost one teacher.
- Less than a minute.
- Because you distracted me.
Do you know what I was thinking about
down there?
What?
That I would live in this house
with you and Minerva.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
Not bad. A little student suite.
Why did you give me the scooter?
Dude, for the first time in my life
I get to choose what I want to do.
Well, what I want to do,
what I want to study
and give any presents I feel like
and choose my friends.
I also have to want to be your friend.
It goes both ways.
Come on, haven't you already proven
that we're friends?
I have proven way more than that.
Knowing what I want
you give me a fucking scooter,
you invite me over to your place
The normal thing would be
to keep your distance.
Okay, things got out of hand,
but I didn't know you would be into me.
You know what?
Twenty-five hundred years ago,
you and I would have fought
with the Sacred Band of Thebes.
It was an army made up of a 150 couples.
They were warriors,
and they gave it all in battle,
because they were friends and lovers.
Bravest ones.
Wow, I love it.
Dude, I love it, it's awesome.
Where did you get that from?
I like reading about ancient history.
A-And what if a soldier
failed one of them?
Hm?
Imagine if, uh, the soldier doesn't defend
the other properly
- and ends up fatally injured.
- Hmm. Mm-hmm.
What then?
Then he kissed him goodbye.
But we are not in Thebes 2,000 years ago.
No, no, of course not.
I know you like giving presents,
but I don't want consolation prizes.
You get it, right, Casamiquela?
Understood, Rubio.
Hey
about the, uh, motor scooter
you've suddenly acquired.
Can you explain it?
Oh, you noticed.
- I got a new scooter.
- Mm-hmm.
Let's say it fell out of the sky.
Yeah.
You found a magic lamp,
you rubbed it and the genie appeared.
Rai.
It's almost insulting.
Although don't look a gift horse
Can you imagine having that much money
and being able
to just give people presents?
Rai gives away scooters,
and you water geraniums, Dad.
Generosity isn't a class thing.
Yes. We all do what we can.
Uh Are you, uh
Are you a couple or what's going on?
I think it's better if I don't spend
too much time with him.
Men is not something I know much about,
but I think that, deep down
I guess it must be
the same as with women, right?
Well, not exactly the same,
because we don't have the same thing
between our legs.
I'm sorry, just kidding, just kidding.
No.
- I love it when you say things like that.
- Mm.
We haven't really talked that much.
Have we, Dad?
No.
One step at a time.
We don't have to talk about
every little thing all at once.
Ooh!