Partners (2012) s01e08 Episode Script

All right.
All right.
Let's get serious here.
This client is a big deal.
He's a player in the music business.
No.
You know what? I'm going to take it one step farther and say he is a playa in the music bidness.
So we got to be at the top of our game here, all right? We got to be, you know, more brilliant than we've ever been.
Totally.
Couldn't agree more.
Now, open your mouth.
- Oh.
Damn.
You're good.
- It's a gift.
- Okay.
This is the last one.
- Absolutely.
Probably.
We'll see.
- Hey.
How about you do some work? - She's probably right.
Pull.
Pull.
Now we can work.
We have to come up with that one inspired idea that will make this project special.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Okay.
Okay.
- I got it.
- I got it.
- No.
You go first.
- Okay, okay.
We do a living roof.
That's hugely popular in Scandinavia.
I'm talking about a roof completely covered in vegetation and plantings.
It's eco-friendly.
It's cost-effective.
It's literally "green".
- Wow.
That's a lot better than my idea.
- Well, what was your idea? My idea was marshmallows in the butt.
Yours is much more professional.
- You really like it? - I think it's great.
I mean, a living roof says "I love the planet, I'm into modern design, and I am a playa in the music bidness.
" - You don't think it sucks? - No.
I don't think it sucks.
You know how can I tell? Because I just said it was great.
I wouldn't say "genius".
I didn't.
But it's pretty close to genius.
I mean, you know, there are some issues to consider.
Irrigation, maintenance.
But, you know, that's all technical stuff and I can figure that out.
Still, "visionary" is a strong word.
It is a strong word, and it is also a word I did not say.
- Phone call for one of you guys.
- Who is it? It's that British guy who, for some reason, Joe keeps calling a playa in the music bidness.
I'll get it.
Lyle, it's Louis.
Listen.
Before you say anything, I just want to tell you that you are going to love my idea for the roof.
The words I'm hearing around the office are "genius" and "visionary".
And the first thing this one says to our client is "You're going to love my idea for the roof.
" I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, okay? I was excited.
It just slipped out.
- So, whose idea was the roof? - Well, that's just it.
It doesn't matter.
It doesn't matter.
We're partners.
It's always our idea.
That's the number one rule of being in a partnership, and you know that, Louis.
Yes, I know.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Hey.
If it makes you feel any better, on the way over here tonight, when I was telling Wyatt the story, I said that the roof was our idea.
Did I not, hushpuppy? Louis, you know I can't tell a lie.
Then don't.
Just tell him how I said it was "our idea".
Would you look at this? He's frozen in fear.
I live with a possum.
Okay.
Look.
I promise tomorrow, at the meeting, I will tell the client that the roof is our idea, okay? Does the client have a name? Because I'm pretty sure you don't actually call him Mr.
Music Bidness.
- Yes.
I call him British Lyle.
- Do me a favor, okay? Tomorrow, when we meet him, do not slip into your British accent.
- You do that too, Joe.
You do that too.
- I know.
I know.
It's just when he starts talking, it's quite difficult not to join in.
You know what I mean? Absolutely.
This gentleman is correct.
It's quite contagious.
Watching Downton Abbey with these two is so brutal.
- All right.
No accents tomorrow, okay? - No.
No.
No goofing around.
We've got to be focused.
We've got to be prepared.
Yes.
And we should leave the marshmallow guns at home.
Wyatt, how was your day at the hospital? Did you find anything weird inside of anybody? I love those stories.
No.
Not today.
But it was rough.
About fifty people came into the E.
R.
with rashes and bites.
Bedbugs.
Wait.
Wait.
Bedbugs freak me out.
Do I have to worry about bedbugs now? No.
No.
Probably not.
It started in Bushwick at a thrift store.
Somebody brought home an infested mattress.
Pretty soon they're everywhere.
Well, speaking of living off your host, thank you for dinner.
- We'll get the next one.
- No, you won't.
I love how we finish each other's thoughts.
All right.
See you tomorrow morning at the meeting.
Yes.
Don't forget to have a scone with your tea.
Absolutely.
Never go to work on an empty stomach.
Never.
Joe? Joe? Joe? - You don't have bedbugs.
- I am positive.
I have bedbugs.
Ally, you know how freaked out you get every time Wyatt tells one of his stories.
You just started using scissors again.
That guy cut off all ten fingers, Joe.
How did he get to the last two? It shouldn't be possible.
- Honey, we don't have bedbugs, okay? - I'm going to go boil the sheets.
Joe.
Louis.
That was quite the impressive presentation.
It's everything I hoped it would be, and then some, but do we need this bearing wall in the family room? - All right.
Well - Accent! It is a large room, dude.
But yeah, we need that loadbearing wall to support such a sizable space.
Ah, yes, of course.
And of course you can't be in this room because that's a room with the bay window looking at it with a garden.
- Right.
Indeed.
The garden - You're doing it.
We're very excited to be working on the landscaping design as well.
And we want the garden to be not only beautiful but fragrant, - something for the eyes and the nose.
- Oh.
For example? Fields of lavender and tea roses and snozzberries and gooseberries as far as the eye can see.
- Aren't you both from New York? - Yes, we are.
Born and raised.
You know, when I was younger, I worked with perhaps most famous partnership of best friends, Simon and Garfunkel.
Well, I am convinced we can design a better house than they can.
Well, of course you can.
They're musicians and you're architects.
I think what my partner is trying to say is that we're confident that you're going to be happy with our work.
- Cheers to that.
- Right, homey.
Brilliant that.
- Which part of New York? - Long Island.
Curious accent.
But I love the work.
Let's do it, boys.
- All right.
- That's fantastic.
Yeah.
Boys, actually, before I sign off on the project, I'd love to see a design for a guesthouse as well.
Can you get me something for our next meeting? - Absolutely.
- Sure.
We'd love to.
We would be delighted to do that.
Oh, and make sure to use a living room for the guesthouse as well.
I've forgotten which one of you came up with that masterstroke.
- Well, we don't keep track of that kind - I did.
Sorry, governor.
Thank you for shopping here, and please come back.
My cousin Ally, who owns the store, makes everything by hand.
Well, except the stones.
We'll thank the good Lord for those.
Renata, look at you.
Everything about that transaction was perfect.
You even remembered to charge the customer this time.
- Yeah.
It felt nice.
Real nice.
- You're in a good mood.
Well, let's just say I got a confidence boost last night.
From a penis.
- That came at me fast.
- That's what I said.
- Where did you meet it? - At the library.
Neither of us have internet.
We were both cruising eBay for used clothes.
- Shared interests.
That's good.
- It gets better.
He decided to take me to his favorite thrift store.
- Thrift store? - Yeah.
Right there in Bushwick.
- Bushwick? - Oh, this place was crawling with deals.
After we bought our turtlenecks, we also bought long underwear, and we were looking for a place to, you know, do stuff through our clothes.
And lucky we stumbled on the most romantic thing ever.
There were mattresses just sitting outside of every single apartment building, as if the world knew exactly what we needed.
You, you, you laid down on an abandoned mattress? Right there in Bushwick.
It was like a Nora Ephron movie.
Come on.
Who cares? We got the job.
And for the record, it's not just any roof.
My idea was for a living roof.
- My idea? "It was my idea"? - No.
It was my idea.
No.
No.
I'm quoting you.
You said, "It was my idea.
" I said it was my idea.
Yes.
I am saying that you said it was your idea.
Why would I say it was your idea? The point is that we are a team.
You contribute.
I contribute.
It doesn't matter who does what.
Okay.
Fine.
We won't say who does what.
What does that mean, "Okay.
Fine.
We won't say who does what"? - What is this? - This is how you talk.
- I talk like I'm playing the piano? - You talk like a piano player.
Oh, come on.
Look.
If you don't want to say who does what, then we won't say who does what.
No, I don't.
See? Even when you're saying "We won't say who does what," it's like you're implying to me that it's important that we know who does what.
- We do know who does what.
- Okay then.
Who does what? I thought you said you didn't want to say who does what.
- I want you to say who does what.
- Joe, I don't want to do this.
Oh, we're doing it, Louis.
We're doing it.
You are being silly.
We are a team.
We collaborate together, like any good team.
Like Simon and Garfunkel.
Oh.
See, that's an upsetting example right there.
What? What? Simon and Garfunkel.
They're a team.
No one knows who did what.
Don't play dumb.
Simon wrote the music and the lyrics.
He was the visionary.
What's with the face? What? No.
What? No face.
I won't do it again.
I promise.
And there it is again.
Okay.
Look.
Look.
Can we just drop it please? - No.
We're getting to the bottom of this.
- I really think that we should drop this.
Because you know you are nothing without me.
Wow.
I really don't want to have this conversation right now.
Yeah? Well, we're having it.
No, we are not because Simon says we aren't.
- I knew it.
- Well, you forced me into it.
You really think you bring more to this partnership, don't you? No.
Not more.
Not more.
You build the models and you make the blueprints and all the blah blah blah.
And I am the idea guy.
I bring the flash and the sizzle and the razzmatazz that makes all the clients excited.
I do the blah blah blah? That's what you think I do, the blah blah blah? Well, let me tell you something.
Without my blah blah blah, you got nowhere to stick your razzmatazz.
You were the one who insisted we say who does what.
- Go write your Graceland.
- I am not familiar with that reference.
You're flying solo on this one.
- Oh, come on.
- Oh yes, you are.
You're going to design Lyle's guesthouse by yourself.
- Fine.
- "In my roof.
" - It was my roof.
- I was quoting you, you moron.
Blah blah blah.
Hey, Ally.
Oh.
Thank you for coming.
I really appreciate it.
- I know you were in the middle of a shift.
- Yeah.
No problem.
What's happening? You know my cousin Renata who works here? She fooled around with some random guy on an abandoned mattress in Bushwick, and I am pretty sure she has bedbugs.
That sounds like she engaged in some very risky bedbug behavior.
I knew it.
But I feel like it would be weird for me to just ask her, so I need you to casually examine her without her knowing.
You think that's less weird? Look.
I know she's my cousin.
We have kind of an awkward relationship.
I'm afraid she cares too much about what I think of her.
Yeah.
Okay.
I get it.
I just don't know if I'm comfortable pretending.
Wyatt, you pull light bulbs out of people all week.
Just do this for me.
No one understands my job.
Super modern.
It's going to be all white.
No moldings.
No details like that.
Just clean, clean lights.
We'll do white walls, with white leather tile.
Floor to ceiling windows.
Floor to ceiling windows.
Floored cement.
Buffed to a high gloss.
I call it insane asylum couture.
- I love the sound of it.
- Thank you.
But I just can't picture it.
That's what I'm here for.
Close your eyes.
Super modern.
It's going to be all white.
No moldings.
No details like that.
Just clean, clean light.
We're going to do white walls with white leather tile.
Yeah.
I think you misunderstood me.
I can hear but I can't see.
- I'm having a problem visualizing it.
- Well, maybe you need to visualize harder.
No.
I don't want to.
I want to see a blueprint and a model.
- But that's just the blah blah blah.
- I want the blah blah blah.
Would you excuse me for just a minute? - Joe.
Joe.
We've got a problem.
- You think you've got a problem.
I'm eating a cheeseburger salad and it's disgusting, and I can't stop.
He wants to see a model and blueprints.
- Outrageous.
So what's the problem? - I have neither a model nor blueprints.
- So, what do you have? - I have ideas.
- And? - Words.
- And? - Razzmatazz.
Oh, come on.
You know I'm not as good at the technical aspects of architecture as you are.
I do know that.
Can't you just come in here and work something out on the computer? I could, but then I'd never be able to run for office.
You know, you're not being a very good partner here.
Blah, blah, blah.
Forget it.
Forget it.
I don't need this.
I'll do this myself.
So Lyle do you like marshmallows? I don't know, Ally.
You're basically asking me to lie, and I can't.
You don't have to lie.
You just have to stick to the plan, if you see bedbugs on her, we will tell her.
And if you don't, then she'll never know.
Renata, what's wrong? I've just gotten dumped by the love of my life.
- You mean Bushwick Bob? - I never knew his name.
Oh, honey.
The best thing you can do right now is just focus on your work.
This is my friend Wyatt, and he needs to buy some jewelry for his mom.
And he would like you to model it because you have the same body type.
- Oh, that's not actually a lie.
- So, what do you say? - I have always wanted to model.
- That's the spirit.
Now, I need you to put on a brave face and just focus on work.
I do not know.
You can do this.
- Okay, but we split the commission.
Deal? - Deal.
Maybe a necklace would be nice.
Here.
Try this.
Get in there, Wyatt.
Get a really good look.
Come on, Renata.
Sell it.
I'm not really sure this is her style.
Maybe an anklet? Hmm.
Yeah.
I'm not sure this is her style either.
She sounds like a bitch.
My mother? Maybe we should see something for the bellybutton area.
- For my mother? - Yes.
Try this.
All right.
Just a warning: I've got an aggressive outie.
It's okay.
I'm a nurse.
Oh, my god.
It's like a little person.
Maybe something for the armpits? All right.
Show's over.
What's going on here? What? Wyatt is just buying jewelry for his mom.
Right, Wyatt? Oh my god, you really are like a possum.
Sorry, Ally.
I can't lie.
Renata, Ally thinks your lifestyle choices have led you to do some questionable things in filthy places, so she asked me here to inspect you for bedbugs.
- Is that true? - I'm sorry.
Well, why can't you just tell me? Well, because I worry sometimes that you're a little sensitive.
Oh, wow.
Well, you know, I came here to learn from you in a place where I feel safe and loved.
I'm not that fragile little victim anymore.
That was the old Renata, the weak Renata, the Renata who never had the strength to refer to herself in the third person.
But now she does because of you, my cousin, my mentor, my friend.
I love you.
Oh, couz.
Okay.
I'm going to go text that guy and show him what he's missing.
- That was really sweet.
- Not that sweet.
She has bedbugs.
- No.
No.
No.
No.
- Just kidding.
Hey, that was my first lie.
That felt pretty good.
All right.
Fine.
You won.
I'm nothing.
Louis, put down the marshmallow gun and let's talk about this.
- There's nothing to talk about.
- You're not nothing.
- Well, I'm not the genius you say I am.
- I never said you were a genius.
- Because I'm nothing.
- It's always extremes with you, Louis.
You're the meanest person in the world.
What what is going on with you? What's going on with me? I'm dying in there.
I obviously can't do this without you.
So what? I can't do this without you either.
Okay? We can't do this without each other.
And if we both know that, why have you been acting like a maniac? Because I guess I guess if I'm being honest, I feel like you do more of the hard work than I do, and so sometimes I have to exaggerate my part.
I guess I still feel like I have to prove something to you.
Louis, you don't think I have the same insecurities? - Really? - Of course I do.
You're the nicest person in the world.
Look.
We're both essential to this partnership.
We're Simon and Simon.
Are we good? Yeah.
Yeah.
We're good.
No.
We're not good.
What are we going to tell Mr.
Bean in there? We're going to tell him "Hello, guest house"! It's the blah blah blah.
Come on.
You didn't think I was just going to blow off a huge client? Boy, if I had a nickel.
- Hey, I knew you'd come through for me.
- I knew you'd fall on your face.
Why do we have to say who does what?