Red Oaks (2014) s01e08 Episode Script

1 Bend your knees.
Fuck you.
Your knees, okay? Your knees.
Okay, watch your footwork.
- Uhh! - You're hanging out in No Man's Land.
When you hit, get back to the center, okay? Let's try it again.
Enh! That's better.
Uhh! - Nice shot.
- Hee hee! Ohh! Great work today.
You're absolutely right, man.
Lower the knees.
You got it.
- Backhand's feeling nice.
- Yeah.
That Feinberg better watch his ass.
Heh heh.
You're a good coach.
Thanks.
Nash spent half his time kissing my ass, and you don't.
I respect that.
I figure you have enough people kissing your ass.
It's good management style.
Don't go handing out compliments like gold stars.
Withhold your approval so people have to try a little harder to earn it.
Works the same way in marriage.
I'll have to remember that.
What are you majoring in again? Accounting.
Jesus.
Why? The plan is to work for my dad after I graduate.
He's a CPA.
I just never understood why anybody would want to spend their whole career counting other people's money.
Did you ever want to work the Street? Like as a trader? No, as a hooker.
Yes, of course as a trader.
See, stocks get all the press, but high yield bonds, that's where the action is at.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Big risk, big reward.
It's not for everyone.
You have to have balls of steel.
You got to be a gambler.
Okay.
Yeah? You ever see The Right Stuff? Oh, the Philip Kaufman movie? Yeah, I love it.
Well, then you know the type cowboys, men who like to push the limits, who lay it all on the line each and every day.
Yeah.
I'll tell you what.
If you ever decide to pull your head out of your ass and switch majors to something useful like finance, you look me up in the city, and I'll arrange an internship for you at my firm.
- Really? - Yeah.
Wow.
Thanks.
Yeah.
All right.
So he just keeps calling and calling, you know? Begging me to take him back.
I just I think I have to change my number.
Sweet ride.
Ladies.
Is this yours? Yeah.
Tips have been pretty good, you know.
Need a lift? Uh, yeah.
Yeah, sure.
- Okay.
- I'll catch you later.
Pretty cool, huh? Yeah.
Nice.
Hey.
Hello.
Glad I ran into you.
I wanted to apologize.
- For what? - The other day.
If I was acting weird or said anything inappropriate, you could probably tell I wasn't being myself.
You were acting a little strange, but Yeah, well, I took a bunch of allergy medicine, and had, like, a heat stroke.
It was ugh it was crazy.
It's okay.
You were funny.
I was? You should take allergy medicine more often.
Uh, hey, you want to, you know, maybe hang out some time? Some time? No.
But if you have a specific time in mind - Yeah? - Yeah.
You want to hang out tomorrow night? No.
Uh but I'm free tonight.
That's great.
Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Great.
What time shall I pick you up? Meet you out front in ten minutes.
- Excuse me? - You, um, you have other clothes in there? Uh, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I do.
Okay.
Good.
So go change.
- Wait.
- Wh Where are we going? The city.
It's good to know you It's nice to have you Next to me It's all right A bunch of Polish sausages and stuff.
Yeah, it's just right here.
Ah, shit.
Rod's here.
That's his truck.
Who's Rod? He's my ma's dickhead boyfriend.
He's the worst.
He's always accidentally walking in on me when I'm in the shower.
- What? - Yeah.
God.
I mean, is there anywhere else I can drop you? My dad's place? Where's that? Pasadena.
Mm.
Anyway, thanks for the ride.
Hey, um, have you, uh um have you seen Back To the Future yet? No.
No.
Want to maybe come check it out? Yeah.
All right.
Come on.
Put this back here.
Let's go.
It's going to be my third time.
- Skye: That's great.
- David: Wow.
The women in Rohmer movies are so smart and sexy.
Hmm.
And the men are so clueless.
He's a genius.
Who else can make a knee erotic? A lot of people.
I have always thought that knees are sexy.
They're no elbows.
Very hot.
Right? Whoo.
What about me? Eh, you know, it's not bad.
- I mean, it's okay.
- It's I love the movie.
I love Michael J.
Fox, but the DeLorean almost ruined it for me.
I mean, even if time travel was theoretically possible, which it isn't, there's no way a DeLorean could I don't think I can afford this.
It's okay.
It's my treat.
Really? Yeah, of course.
I feel underdressed.
You look great.
Better than great.
Ooh, lobster.
So, uh, what do you want to do now? Uh, uh, maybe food? - Okay.
- Great.
There's a bagel place around here.
I don't want a bagel.
No.
No.
Yeah.
That's a stupid idea.
It's a bad idea.
It's Oh.
Where are we going? SoHo.
To get something to eat? Uh, a party - Oh, cool.
- actually.
- Can I get a bagel there? - No.
So if you had a magical sports car, say, like my Trans Am, and you could go back in time, what would you do different? I guess not date Steve.
I never did understand what you saw in that guy.
I mean, he could be sweet.
You know? And despite what everyone thinks, he's not stupid.
I mean, he writes music.
Thank you.
Dessert? Not here.
And only if you let me buy.
Okay.
Deal.
I feel like I should be wearing a 10 gallon hat.
What? Like Jon Voight, Midnight Cowboy.
- Serge.
- Skye.
Hello, Alec.
Hello.
You dirty whore, where have you been all summer? France.
I, um, I just got back, actually.
I'm still pretty jet lagged.
We're honored you're gracing us.
Don't mind him.
He dropped all our poppers down the storm drain earlier, so he's in a bad mood.
Who's this? This is my friend David.
- Hello, David.
- Hi.
I'm just going to get some drinks, okay? And what do you do, David? Besides Skye? Uh, I go to NYU, and I teach tennis.
Oh, I thought you had the body of an athlete, but I couldn't decide whether it was a racquet sport - or water polo.
- Don't make fun of him.
I wasn't.
I was just making an observation.
- That was rude.
- What's rude is you losing our poppers.
Would you please stop bringing that up? I mean, you wouldn't drop Two soft serves.
Thanks.
- Have a good night.
- All right, good night.
- Which one? - Man: Whoa.
Which one do you want? - Uh, this one.
- Okay.
What the Wheeler: What's up, fellas? Mm.
Ohh.
Brain freeze.
Let me try something.
Better? So you never told me what you would do if you had a time-traveling DeLorean and could go back in time.
Would you do anything different? I don't know, I guess I'd be too afraid to change something because it could mess with the time line that led to tonight.
You know what you could do different? What? Learn how to swim.
Yeah.
Probably not a bad idea.
So you want to? You offering to teach me? You taught me how to parallel park.
Okay.
Okay.
All right.
Hurry up and finish that.
What? Like, you mean now? T tonight? You got something better to do? Uh, no, I guess.
You want to hear something weird? Always.
Your dad offered me an internship today at his firm.
What did you say? I said I'd think about it.
And are you? Thinking about it? Well, I figured I'd be stupid not to.
Your dad is super successful.
And he makes what he does sound kind of exciting, you know? Traveling all over the world, making deals.
What? - Nothing.
- Wait.
You don't think it's such a good idea? Doesn't matter what I think.
Cool.
Do you want to dance? - Yeah.
Sure.
- Oh, great.
Wow, most guys have to be dragged onto the dance floor.
Yeah? Well, I'm not most guys.
Let's dance.
Lady better watch out Come on.
Lady better watch out Do you know who I am? Do you really know who I am? Well, if you don't know who I am Let me tell you I'm Capital T, get up, it's me So what do you think you'll do after school? I'm thinking of moving to Santorini and starting my own jewelry line.
Or England, except I hate tea, so I don't know.
That doesn't scare you? You don't have to drink the tea.
No, I mean the not knowing part.
Why should that scare me? I'm only 20.
I'm not supposed to know what I want to do with my life.
- Whoo! - Ladies better watch out All ladies better watch out We got the bigger tours I'm sure there's more, girl You better watch out All ladies better watch out For Capital T, the ladies' man He is really amazing.
Yeah, he was really okay.
I'll show you amazing.
Watch this.
If I'm in the street, I'm always flirtin' And it gets my body workin' If I'm on the stage, I'm never joking Ladies out there know that I'm stoking Miss Molly, save the world if you can Show the guys in the house how to be a ladies' man You better watch out All ladies better watch out For the ladies' man called Capital T Big or small Short or tall, girl You better watch out 'cause I'm gonna get ya, girl If you don't watch out Yeah Wow.
Wow.
Yeah.
That was crazy.
Who knew? What time is the bus? Uh, next one's in an hour.
So what do we do till then? I don't know.
What is there to do on Broadway? We could take in a show.
You know, I do love the theater.
I read about this one.
It's the new Andrew Lloyd Webber.
You want to check it out? Sure.
You coming? You serious? Come on.
Come on, let's go.
Hey, where are the dancing cats? - I mean - Shh.
Oh, look.
Good.
They must get water breaks.
Well, it's important to keep hydrated.
This is very true.
She looks bored.
Oh, yeah, sure.
He's the one doing all the work.
He Happy now? Yeah.
Maybe we have to call out requests.
I'm I'm curious.
Do you always talk this much during sex? Sometimes I weep.
With gratitude.
- Mm-hmm.
- Shh.
Okay.
I've realized something.
- Yes.
Mm-hmm.
- Okay.
Every single person alive on the planet is the product of an orgasm.
- Hopefully two.
- Shh.
- Sorry.
- Shh! Shh.
Have you seen enough? - Can we go? - Yes.
Yes.
Let's get out of here.
What's wrong? My wallet is gone.
Are you sure? Well, it's not in here.
- Let me see.
- And I, uh Did you check under the seat? It's too dark.
Does anyone have a flashlight? Maybe try a cigarette lighter.
Okay.
Thank you.
- Does anyone - Uh - No.
- Yup.
Here.
Wait.
I've lost Oh, shit.
- What? - My wallet's gone, too.
Fuck.
I don't think we should be here right now.
Oh, no, it's fine.
Trust me.
I do it all the time.
Yeah, but I read somewhere that you're supposed to wait a half hour after you ate before you go in the water or you'll get cramps.
Oh, nah.
We just tell that to the kids so they don't puke in the pool.
But I don't even have a swim trunks.
Oh, don't worry about that.
Just you know, wear your underwear.
Okay.
Uh, I I'm sorry.
How is it? It's warm.
Come on.
Yeah, I'm coming.
Wheeler.
Don't be shy.
You got to take your shirt off.
That's right.
Don't be nervous.
All right, now just keep reaching out.
Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God.
- All right, see? - Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Easy going.
- All right.
Easy does it, easy does it.
- All right, here we go.
- Easy does it, easy does it.
Let's get you on your back.
I don't like this, I don't like this.
I think I got everything I need.
I'll be in touch with you if we find your property, but I wouldn't hold my breath.
Wait, Officer, how do we get home? Yeah.
Can you give us a ride or something? Back to Jersey? Call your folks.
Mine aren't even home.
They're out at some gala, and I don't know the number to my father's car phone.
Yeah, I can't call my dad.
It'll give him another heart attack.
Shit.
Who are we going to call? - Give me that quarter.
- Yeah? - I have an idea.
- Okay.
Yeah.
Great.
Thank you.
Bye.
He'll be here in an hour.
Thank God.
Your folks going to be mad? More worried.
Mine will probably get me one of those ankle bracelets they use to monitor people on house arrest.
Which is basically what this entire summer has been.
Yeah? I was supposed to be in France.
What happened? They found out I was having an affair with one of my professors.
Oh.
No, I'm kidding.
I figured you'd think it was something like that.
Yeah, the truth isn't nearly so glamorous.
No? I flunked a bunch of my classes and got put on academic probation.
That sucks.
Remember when I was telling you that I wanted to start my own jewelry line? Yeah.
It's because I've pretty much accepted that I will never be a very good painter.
Well, I think you're good.
Now just relax.
You got to - I'm trying.
- I know.
All right.
Take a deep breath.
Head back.
Expand your lungs.
I'm not going to let you drown.
- Okay.
- I promise.
See Look, you're doing it.
Your body already knows how to do it.
You just got to trust it.
There you go.
I'm like my own flotation device.
I'm going to let go a little bit, all right? - Okay.
- All right.
1, 2, and 3.
Gr Look at you.
There you go.
That's Oh.
No.
Okay.
It's okay.
You're okay.
Man: Who's there? Get your asses out of there before I call the cops.
It's okay.
We work here.
Wheeler? Is that you? Look at me, Gary.
I'm swimming! Wait.
Hold me up.
Boychik? Oh, yes.
Thank you.
Nothing else I'd rather be doing at 4:30 in the morning.
Skye: Hello.
- Skye.
- Hi.
- Seatbelts, please.
- They're on.
Hey.
Good morning.
Is it? Almost.
How long was I asleep? Maybe a few hours.
What about you? Couldn't fall asleep.
What have you been doing? Just, like, thinking about stuff.
Thanks again from saving me from Rod.
Oh.
Rod? My ma's dickhead boyfriend.
Oh, right.
You're welcome.
And, uh, thanks for teaching me to swim.
Any time.
I, uh, guess we should head in to work.
Yeah.
I'll tell you one thing.
You're treating me to breakfast after this.
Okay.
You know, when I told you my rule against shtupping female club members, I assumed you understood I meant daughters in addition to wives.
Yeah, well, we're just friends.
by CookiesMonsta Two dozen other dirty lovers Must be a sucker for it Cry, cry, but I don't need my mother Just hold my hand while I come To a decision on it Sooner or later Your legs give way, you hit the ground Save it for later Don't run away and let me down Sooner or later You hit the deck, you get found out Save it for later Don't run away and let me down You let me down Black air and seven seas, all rotten through But what can you do? I don't know how I'm meant to act With all of you lot Sometimes I don't try I just know, know, know, know, know Know, know, know, know, know, know, know Know, know, know, know, know, know Know, know, know, know, know Know, know, know, know Sooner or later Your legs give way, you hit the ground Save it for later Don't run away And let me down Sooner or later