Robin Hood s01e08 Episode Script

Tattoo? What Tattoo?

Much! Saracen raid! The King's under attack.
Much! (Robin yells) Master Master! - You're wounded.
- Get help.
The King's tent.
Now.
Now! Your Majesty! - Acre? - (Sighs) Yes.
It's his birthday today.
The King.
Gisborne is celebrating in Locksley.
Can you believe that? The great and the good raising their cups in your house, to a man who wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you.
Without you there would be no birthday to celebrate.
Can you imagine them, the Sheriff and his cronies and their syco sycophantic It's galling In Locksley? More than galling.
What? Hm! Why don't we celebrate the King's birthday too? Hm? - What do you say? - There is something wrong with you.
- Mm-hm.
- I'm serious.
What is it? What is it!? This is Robin's house.
Look at these people.
My lords, ladies and gentlemen.
Thank you for your attendance here today.
As you know, we are here to celebrate the King's birthday.
We wish him success in the Holy Land and we pray for his speedy return to these shores.
Please, raise your goblets in a toast.
- To King Richard.
- King Richard.
I myself have a particular reason to hope for the King's early return to England.
For when that day comes, this fair lady, Marian, has consented to be my wife.
Before I toast my future bride, there is something I would like to present to her.
May I? You leave me little choice.
- I thought you had already made your choice.
- I have.
This means so much to you, doesn't it? This means everything to me.
Have I not expressed myself? You mean everything to me.
My lords and ladies, I give you the future Lady Gisborne.
(All cheer) Have we missed the speeches? Hood! I don't remember inviting you.
Since when has a man needed an invitation to his own house? I don't know.
Perhaps he lost all rights to the house by becoming an outlaw? I would have declined anyway.
My men and I are here on business.
Please, everyone, if you could assist us by removing all your jewelry and valuables, and handing them to that man over there.
Much? And then proceed to that room where you'll all wait quietly until we've gone.
Do as he says.
Wise decision, Gisborne.
(Little John) Well come on, move it! Move it! Get up there.
This way please, my friends.
Thank you.
(Robin) Look on the bright side.
(Allan) Don't be shy.
You'll sleep well tonight, knowing your donations will be feeding the poor of Nottinghamshire by this time tomorrow.
- Signal.
- Nearly done.
Master? So - Robin, this is ugly - Yes, this is ugly.
This is my house.
- So, Marian - Back off, Locksley.
Marian does not carry money about her person.
- How do you know? - He is right.
- I do not carry money.
- My compliments.
You're very wise to take precautions when there are so many unsavory characters around.
- But this ring? - Robin, signal.
You've taken everything else, leave that.
- Robin - What? (Little John) The signal! - Please - We should do this again.
It was entertaining.
With any luck once will be enough.
- Surprise! - It was you? Do not pretend that you do not love war.
- I've seen you fight.
- When? I do not recall.
Robin, what's the matter with you? Wake up! Ah! Food poisoning? (Much) Master! Guy, leave him.
I don't think so.
What has he taken? Trinkets, a few purses nothing.
He has your ring.
Your parties are much more fun than mine.
Is this what you're after? Take it.
- Who else, Gisborne? - Who else what? You do not travel to the Holy Land to try and kill the King of England on your own.
At least you don't.
You're not that clever.
Are you surprised the King has enemies? He has no idea.
He would make peace with the Turk.
And there will never be peace with the Turk.
You made sure of that.
Dressing as Saracens and attacking your own King.
I did what was necessary.
For whom? The Sheriff? Is he behind this? Who else?! I will find out, and when I do, I will see you all hang for treason.
Oh, and when will that be? When the King returns.
I wouldn't hold your breath if I were you.
The King will return.
If the King returns I still win.
I win Marian.
What are you gonna do now? Cut my other arm? No, I'm going to kill you.
(Little John) No! Killing we do not do.
That's what you taught us.
We do not take part in bloodshed unless absolutely necessary.
That was necessary.
Hang on.
Where 's Djaq? I think you should see this.
He's been acting like this since you brought him in.
He's up to no good.
There.
What? He's not doing anything.
That's how I know.
They never do nothing.
They always try something.
Something's wrong.
With your permission, my lord, I'd like to have him hanged sooner rather than later.
What's that around his neck? - What is it, pretty boy? - Must be some sort of heathen magic.
I don't like it.
And I don't like him.
- I'm glad you got me here for this.
- Thank you, my lord.
A clue - no.
The next time you get me here for no reason, I shall see you inside the cell, not outside it.
Do you understand me? - Yes, my lord.
- I thought you would.
(Sizzling) (Laughs) I knew it.
Heathen magic.
Djaq is our priority.
She's one of us.
How long before Gisborne's men come looking for their master? I need to sort this and I need to sort this now.
This man is a traitor.
He tried to kill the King! Look, I'm not being funny, but - I didn't see it.
- Nor did I.
You sent me for help, remember? You were about to kill him.
What happened to your famous justice? - Trials and evidence and - I'm telling you, it was him.
He's not even trying to deny it! He tried to kill the King in Acre.
He stabbed me and left me for dead and then he went for the King.
Then have him tried in public.
Then he's seen to be a traitor.
You kill him here, he's a victim.
- I thought you said a Saracen stabbed you.
- That was before I realized it was Gisborne.
Well, get your story straight.
I've told you I fought him! I cut his arm! - His tattoo! Look! - You didn't mention tattoos.
I don't remember tattoos.
Anyway, that's not the point.
The point is They've got Djaq.
We can't leave her.
- We've got to get Djaq, Robin.
- They could be torturing her.
Do any of you understand what treason is? I understand what torture is.
Robin, we go to Nottingham.
For Djaq.
This is for England.
And this is for England too.
Robin! Sorry.
Bottled hellfire, my lord.
Melts solid iron? It's the devil's work.
Did you make this yourself, my friend? Oh, come on, do tell.
(Tuts) Solid iron (Sizzling) Ooh, ouch.
Vicious stuff.
Nasty.
Very.
Shall we have him killed now? Killed? Don't be so ridiculous.
If he can make more of this, I might even kiss him.
Sorry.
- This is difficult.
- Untie me.
That's That's the difficult bit.
John said Little John said.
I think we should wait until they get back.
- Do you want some water? - Much.
Untie me.
Now! I knew this would happen.
That man betrayed England.
The slaughter in the Holy Land continues because of him.
- The others would not understand.
- Then you must make them understand.
Exactly.
I need to talk to him.
And I cannot do that tied to a tree.
- Just untie me.
- You promise me? Because earlier earlier you were not yourself.
You were I'm doing it.
Now, you've had an upset.
You need to just sit down, have a nice, hot Robin! Who else was in the plot to kill the King? What are you going to do if I don't talk? I will kill you.
I will kill you whether you talk or not.
No.
You've changed, Locksley.
You told me so yourself.
"Show me an argument ever settled with bloodshed," was it? You've become a peace-lover, warm and woolly, taking trinkets for the poor.
What are you doing?! You promised me! You said you would explain things! - How is this explaining things? - They are simple men.
They've spent years hiding in the forest.
They cannot understand politics.
What has happened to you? I have not hidden in the forest, and I cannot understand this.
That, Much, is because you are also simple.
I did not mean that.
I have never seen you like this.
And may I say I am glad? Whoa! - Delivery for the castle.
- Toll charge, ha'penny.
Daylight robbery.
- Here! I know you fellas, don't I? - Go on! (Allan) See? Who needs Robin? As easy as shelling peas.
Alchemy! Marvelous idea.
Frustrating results.
But Especially if you're my alchemist.
This is my last one.
Inkwell.
Poor fellow.
Good boy.
Handsome.
A bit like you.
Soft hands.
But his alchemy, well, it was wretched, depressing.
Listen, I have to say, I was very depressed.
(Whispers) But then you came along with your wonderful Saracen.
What is it? Zayt al-Zaj.
Well, whatever.
Hm? A liquid that can burn through solid metal.
Well, who'd have thought? So I want you to make me up a batch.
I do not know how.
I need particular ingredients.
- I do not see them here.
- We have guards over there on the door.
They'll get you whatever it is that you need.
You have, shall we say two days? (Chuckles) Joke.
Two hours.
(Much) This is wrong.
Master This is wrong.
I'm not going to kill him.
Just make him talk.
The plot against the King.
I want names.
What kind of King deserts his people to fight someone else's war in a foreign land? If you are his people, then he was right to desert them.
No! Stop! I will not take part in this.
You will regret this.
You will see sense and you will regret it.
This does not concern you, Much.
You are my master.
Everything concerns me.
I have followed you into battle.
I have followed you into the forest.
But I will not follow you into torture.
Then leave me.
- If I thought you meant that - Go! Oh You seem to be short of friends, Locksley.
And what about all those peasants you've championed? They'll be so disappointed when they realize that under your fine words, you're just as violent as the next man.
And not just the peasants either.
Some of the nobles you've championed.
Swayed by your charitable acts.
Edward Marian Make no mistake.
This ends here, traitor! Don't suppose anyone's given any thought as to how we get back out again? Later! W e came for Djaq.
Face it, you're loyal to a weak King.
- A King with principles.
- He's a pawn and you know it.
- It's not England's war, it's Rome's.
- Then why have you made it worse? Your attack broke the ceasefire.
There could have been peace.
There will always be war.
So let's have a King who will fight for our gain, not the Pope's.
Do you know why I went to war? To recover Jerusalem.
To recover our Holy Land.
- How noble.
- No.
When I got there, I met the Muslims and the Jews.
And I saw it was their Holy Land, too.
What are you, Locksley, Lord of the Dance? And you were right, there will always be war, as long as people like you revel in their own ignorant bigotry.
- I have finished.
- So quickly? We can test it on your outlaw friends.
According to my kitchen master, they've arrived already.
They're so predictable.
Oh Were you expecting to be rescued? Hm? They won't think of looking for you in here.
What are you doing? What are you doing?! (Coughing and spluttering) Guards! Get on your knees! Guards! Stop the fire! Sound the alarm! Guards! - There 's no one here.
- That can't be right.
No prisoners.
Not even a jailer.
I'm not being funny, you don't think this could be a Trap.
Listen, gents, why don't we just talk about this, eh? - Are you all right? - Are you all right? - I thought we came to save you.
- Now I'm saving you.
- You're a woman, we're men.
- Irritating, isn't it? (Djaq) Where now? Do you actually have a plan? I've never been in this part of the castle.
Have you? (Djaq) Robin! Where is he? Well, he is basically That's difficult to explain.
- Robin did not come? - He was, um he was distracted.
Because I am a girl? Here Go! Seen this? Indoor privy.
So? So, it leads outdoors.
- Well? Have you got any better ideas? - Must be another way.
We go.
Go! Go! Go! Catch me at the bottom? If you were that desperate to go, all you had to do was ask! Take him to the dungeon.
If he doesn't want to play nice, we will play nasty.
We need Robin.
You thought you'd come back from the Holy Land, covered in glory, didn't you? Well, guess what.
No one here cares They couldn't even point at the Holy Land on a map.
So what was it all for, eh? Robin of Locksley, Earl of Huntingdon, hero of Acre.
And look at you now.
You're just a common outlaw.
House and lands lost.
Do you think I don't laugh every time I go to sleep in your bed? And Marian, the woman you gave up.
Lost.
To me.
You think I won't laugh every time To be honest, I was surprised you decided to stay in Nottingham.
I mean, surely you would have friends elsewhere that would take you in.
I should have realized.
Marian.
I thought you'd given up long ago.
But you still carry a torch for her, don't you? And now she is to be mine.
I wouldn't hold my breath if I were you.
She has accepted me.
When the King returns.
A detail.
She will know you are a traitor.
I will tell her.
- I'll deny it.
- She is astute.
True.
And she has her doubts about me.
But she is also stirred by me.
She will believe my denial.
- What are you doing? You're a killer now? - When I have to be.
Grow up.
Gisborne made his choice.
Everything is a choice.
Everything we do.
- You told me that.
- What choice? In the Holy Land, Saracens came to kill the King.
But it wasn't Saracens.
- It was him.
- Rubbish.
He stabbed me and left me for dead.
And then he went to kill the King in his bed.
- I don't believe you.
This is about - What? You and me.
I want you to know, I didn't realize he was going to announce the marriage.
Well, you didn't seem uncomfortable.
I have proof.
His arm.
I wounded him.
His tattoo.
What tattoo? - And I was uncomfortable.
- He has a tattoo on his arm.
- You took his ring.
- You took his ring.
How could he have been in the Holy Land? He was here in your house.
What? He was unwell for many weeks.
No one was allowed to see him.
- That is why I have to kill him.
- No.
Even if you are right - I am right.
- A trial.
The process of law.
There is no law.
Until Richard returns, the Sheriff is the law.
Gisborne is the law.
And that is why I have to kill him.
No.
I forbid you.
- You don't believe me? - I don't know what to believe.
Guy is not a man who would Surely Of course.
He is to be your husband.
You know full well I agreed to that under duress.
You know I have to play things this way from the inside.
For my father if for nothing else.
I do not have the option to just run off into the forest.
- What? - Everything is a choice.
Now, look.
He's been my master for ten years.
What do you expect me to do? What happened? You stink! Where 's Djaq? It was a trap! - We came out through the privy.
- She was right behind us.
They took her back.
Him? Alive.
It has been somewhat touch and go.
Not since the Holy Land have I seen It took all my powers to calm him.
And and hers.
But it was I who fetched her.
So you could say it was all my doing.
We need him.
- We go to Nottingham.
- I thought you were going.
I have unfinished business here.
- It's Djaq - (Robin) The Sheriff will be expecting a rescue.
It is better to wait.
To think.
Robin, wake up! It's Djaq! You are thinking of just one man.
I am thinking of the King and the whole of England.
Djaq is not "one man", she's a woman! Have you thought what could happen if the Sheriff realizes? "Jack" is a woman? The Saracen? - Long story.
- He can wait.
- Djaq cannot.
- No.
- If they know we're coming, we could all die.
- True.
But it's Djaq.
What does that mean, "True, but it's Djaq"? It's not even an answer! But the thing is - I like her - I think I love her.
(Much) Well! Even then, that is that is no reason to knowingly walk into a trap.
Robin is right.
You need to think.
Look.
That is your solution.
- Trade him for her.
- No! I am not letting him get away with this.
Robin Not sorry.
- Has he talked yet? - He's just about to start.
Well, hurry up then.
Try and do it quietly.
I can't bear bawling.
My Lord Sheriff.
I need your help.
They said to give you this.
Said you'd understand.
This um This outlaw.
He didn't rob you? He was only interested in the exchange.
Guy for your prisoner.
My husband-to-be for a Saracen.
You see, something is not right.
How do I know this isn't an outlaw ruse? Guy is your Lieutenant, your ally Your friend.
Friend? We are talking about the same Guy? I mean, I hardly noticed he was missing.
My Lord Sheriff, please.
They have Guy.
If they should do anything to him, I Yes, all right.
Might just stop your sniveling.
The outlaws will kill Guy if you harm the Saracen boy.
Have you harmed him? No.
OK.
Prepare the Saracen for travel.
Where is he? They've taken him.
It was the only way.
For Djaq It was not their decision to make.
Where have they gone? - Where? - I'm not gonna tell you.
- Please, you can't make me.
- If you are my friend.
If you are my true friend, you must do this one thing for me.
Please.
(Grunts in frustration) Robin Hood has gone to a lot of trouble for you, pretty boy.
Not one rescue, but two.
- He didn't come the first time.
- Aw.
Are you feeling unloved? Ah! Ah, pretty boy.
Not a pretty boy at all! No wonder they want you back in the forest, hm? All those long, cold nights! Well, obviously you won't be going back.
You see Hood, he thinks there are two tunnels that are clear.
One in, one out.
Clever But not clever enough.
Where 's Hood? Here.
Robin.
No! I did not agree to this trade, John.
- Dissent in the ranks? - I did not agree to this trade.
But I should have done.
Let him go.
It's all right, Hood.
Your secret's out, hm? Your pet Saracen is a lady, hm? The great thing is, she gave me this.
Your secret's out, too.
There is no way Gisborne went to the Holy Land without your say-so.
Holy Land? Gisborne? I have proof.
On his arm.
His tattoo.
People in the King's Guard know about that tattoo, and when they return, he will pay.
And you will pay.
Tattoo? - (Sizzling) - Aaargh! - What tattoo? - No! Shut up, you big jester! - Let's go.
- You're not going anywhere.
Guards! Look, an old tunnel! Surprise! - Gotcha! - (Robin) Surprise.
An old shaft.
- Surprise.
- Let's go.
Go! Go! Another time, Gisborne.
Djaq.
Get on them! - Get John out.
- Pull! Pull! - (Groaning) - Stop mewling, Gisborne.
Maybe in future you'll think twice before painting your arm like a girl.
Is it true? There could have been peace without this Gisborne? And yet you gave him up for me? Brought you some food.

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