Shades of Blue (2016) s01e08 Episode Script
Good Cop, Bad Cop
1 Yip bi di dit bip bi-ee-i-di-dit Wander over yonder Yip bi di dit bip bi-ee-i-di-dit Wander over yonder Wander Wander over over yonder yonder Wander yonder Yip bi di dit bip bi-ee-i-di-dit Wander over yonder Alright! Hater! Yip bi di dit bip bi-ee-i-di-dit Wander over yonder Yip bi di dit bip bi-ee-i-di-dit Wander over yonder Wander Wander over over yonder yonder Wander yonder Yip bi di dit bip bi-ee-i-di-dit Wander over yonder Cruising through outer space With his handsome skeleton face Traveling the galaxies Conquering all he sees Smart men fear him, ladies want to be near him Lord Hater never fails Opening secret doors, hang-gliding past dinosaurs Hater, the greatest in the galaxy Hater, the greatest in the galaxy - Sir, is this a - Brilliant idea? Absolutely.
I needed to remind the universe how evil and awesome I am.
So I ordered the Watchdogs to make a propaganda film using the most sophisticated and respected art form in the universe.
This is to impress Dominator, isn't it? What?! No! But if she happens to see this, and finally realize how awesome and kissable I am, so be it.
Now shut up.
I want to hear what I sound like as a cartoon character.
Today shall be the final reckoning as I, Lord Hater, the greatest in the galaxy, finally become the greatest in the galaxy.
Dead on.
Great casting, Watchdogs.
I've located the all-powerful staff of power.
Ooh, sounds powerful.
The staff of power is so powerful, it can do the impossible make me even more powerful than I am now.
It will do this by charging me with a power which I will use to power up, thus giving me more power than I currently have.
Power! Solid writing, too.
- Peepers! - Y-Yes, sir.
Oh, no, my glasses.
Are you kidding? This is totally inaccurate.
This is a terrible plan.
It'll never work.
Seems pretty accurate to me.
There.
Viper Mountain.
Now no one shall stop me from getting the staff of power.
Ah, not so fast, Hater.
- Emperor Awesome? - The staff of power will be mine.
Watchdogs, attack! - Oh, come on.
- Oh, yeah! Get him! Whoo! Wow, what an impressive fight.
Awesome doesn't stand a chance.
We should stop describing it and watch in silence.
What's going on? Why aren't I seeing all my cool moves? We kind of blew all our animation budget on the Watchdog fight.
We thought it was more important to the story.
Finally, the staff of power is mine! And I win, just like in real life.
Dominator's gonna love I mean Great work, guys.
Hey, Hatey.
Oh, no.
You didn't.
Hater, it's me, your old pal.
- They totally did.
- You put Wander in my cartoon?! I don't know about this, Wander.
It seems like a baaaa-ad idea.
Oh, that is perfect! You nailed him! Oh, and I was totally gonna destroy you guys.
What happens? Oh, don't tell me.
No spoilers, but I bet I destroy them with my staff of power.
Finally, I can now destroy you, Wander, with my staff of power.
Knew it!! Pew, pew, pew, pew! Oh, yeah! Yeah! Duh, but I just wanted to sing you a song.
Banjo! Wait.
What's going on? Ow.
Ooh.
Ow.
Ow! Ouch.
Oh! Ouch.
Ow! Oof.
Ow, ow! No, please, stop.
My back-up back-up glasses.
Oh, no.
These Watchdogs are too tough.
I'm done for.
Wander, help! I am the Wanderer! What?! Oh, I get it.
You made Wander all strong so it will be more impressive when I finally beat him.
This is a smart cartoon.
This ends now.
Not if I can help it.
This seems like it's going on for a while.
Uh, yeah.
We were 15 seconds short, so we had to pad it out.
Just give it a minute.
Any second now.
Yeah! Go, me! Although I could've done it so many times before this time, now, because I am so much more powerful this time, this is the time when I will finally destroy you, Wander.
This is the time to die! Yes! Guys, I think I've got something real special here.
But, Hater, all I ever wanted was to be your friend.
Wait, what? I just wanted to be your friend in the hopes it would stop you from bein' so evil.
Wow.
All of a sudden, out of nowhere, I've come to realize that I have a tendency to compensate for my insecurity and loneliness by being evil and scary.
But you, Wander, saw the one thing that I really needed was not an army or planets or power No, no, no, no, no! but a friend.
Take my hand, friend - # We'll skip through the flowers # - What's going on?! Because our friendship - This is too good! - # Is the real staff of power # My heart is dancing Each day's a fantasy I said I wanted this to be true to life! All you did was make a cartoon where I almost succeed, then Wander shows up, tries to be my friend, and ruins everything! - Yeah, but - That's what always happens.
Burn it.
Burn it all! Never let anybody see this cartoon ever! Especially not Dominator.
Well, sir, we would, but we're broadcasting this live.
And ratings are through the roof.
What? No! We gotta animate a new ending where I destroy Wander.
Animation is so hard! People who do this for a living deserve more credit and respect! Great day, buddy.
What do you say we end it with a big old hug? Only if it's the biggest.
Aw, it's okay, Hater.
I think this show is amazing! Aaah! Gotta change the ending right now! Too bad.
I think Lord Hater would really like - the twist ending.
- Twist ending? You fool.
This was all a trick.
What better way to crush your spirits than to make you think we were actually friends? My spirits are crushed.
Now before an audience of billions, I will finally destroy you.
You're putting me on your TV show? Oh, that's awful sweet of you.
What? No.
Don't step on my lines.
Nooooo!! Ugh.
Lame.
It's the Mystery Kids Mysteries.
This week, the gang solves the case of Mavis' haunted sweatshirt.
Crikeys! Driving.
Mysteries.
Ruff, ruff.
Ruff.
I'm a dog, dudes.
Now that's a cartoon.
Hi, boys and girls.
I'm TV's Wander.
Lord Hater sure wanted that staff of power, but what he really wanted all along was a friend.
Well, actually, that was just a trick - to destroy you, Wander.
- Oh, right.
But he sure worked hard to get there, - and if you work hard, too - Not really.
His Watchdogs did most of the fightin' for him.
Oh, right.
So then the lesson was uh Don't know.
It sure was funny, though.
But there's nothin' funny about bicycle safety.
Always wear a helmet.
That's just good horse sense.
Probes, get in here! Oh, please tell me one of you found a non-lame planet to dominate.
We're running low on Volcanium X.
You, Bot 42, show me what you've got.
Scouting Measlon 3.
Trace elements detected.
Population zero.
Seriously? Just one planet? And this useless hunk of rock is the best you've got? I wouldn't even get out of bed to destroy this.
Recommendation: Do not dominate.
Gee, ya think? Bot 13, show this poor, pathetic bot how it's done.
Scouted: Thebulon 9.
Volcanium X detected.
Scouted: Strualiax.
Volcanium X detected.
Scouted: Aggrothia.
Volcanium X detected.
Recommendation: Dominate Yes! That is what I'm talkin' about.
Why can't the rest of you be more like Bot 13? As for you, you've disappointed me for the last time! Now the rest of you, get back to work! Affirmative, Lord Dominator.
Target acquired.
Seacironicus 12.
Commence scouting protocol.
Sylvia, look.
Sylvia, look at me! Sylvia, you're not looking! That's nice, Wander.
After all the running we've been doing lately, I'm gonna make the most of this place before Dominator wrecks it, too.
Good golly, I am so sorry.
Are you a Dominator probe? Still, the poor guy sure looks like he needs some help.
Hello there.
You okay? What's your name? Beep Boop, huh? Nice to meet you, Beep Boop.
Folks call me Wander.
What brings you round these parts? Explore planet.
Identify planet's valuable resources.
Hey, me, too.
Aw, you don't seem so bad.
Wanna be travel pals? Right! Sylvia, I'd like you to meet Wander, buddy, I promise to be super interested after my post-sleep nap.
Why don't you go check out the boardwalk? Sure thing, Syl.
Come on, Beep Boop.
Yeah, beep boop, wazzle fazzle.
Whatever A vacation's twice as fun when you have a travel pal to share it with.
Scanning for Volcanium X.
Volcanium X detected.
Great idea, Beep Boop.
I love games.
Volcanium X detected.
Hmm.
I really think it's that one.
Oh, well, better luck next time.
Volcanium X.
Eggs? Oh, you're hungry.
It's kind of hot for eggs, but I know just what you need.
Analyzing.
Sample consists of sugar, dairy substances, c-c-corn syrup.
Ice cream isn't just a bunch of ingredients.
It's the smiles of children.
The joy of a delicious cold treat on a hot day.
The best things in life are more than just a list of their parts.
But between you and me, the secret ingredient is love! Volcanium X detected.
What is it, travel pal? Volcanium X detected.
Oh, I get it.
Oh, you look great! - Let's try on everything! - Negative, negat Whoo-hoo! Beep Boop, you've been such an amazing travel pal, so I got you a present.
I saw how much you wanted it, so I went back and I won it for you.
Volcanium X! Wander, where are you, buddy? A Dominator bot? Wander, no! Well, hey, Sylvia.
Meet my friend Beep Boop.
Friend? That hunk of metal is one of Dominator's probes.
Well, sure, on the outside.
And on the inside, it's all lava and lasers, and a computer brain programmed only for destruction.
He also likes ice cream, and making silly faces, and Wander! That thing is gonna signal Dominator to come destroy this planet with us on it.
Oh, Beep Boop loves this place.
He would never do anything Volcanium X obtained.
System repair in progress.
like that? Beep Boop! Stop! Please don't leave.
We had so much fun today, didn't we? We could have fun tomorrow, too, if you wanted.
Beep Boop! Get a grip, buddy.
That's an evil robot.
He's not evil.
He's my pal, and he'll be back.
- I know it.
- Yeah, back to destroy this planet.
We need to warn people to get outta here before Dominator shows up.
- I'm not leaving without Beep Boop.
- Wander.
Ugh.
Bot 13, report.
You better have something good for me.
What? No way! No one planet has that much Volcanium X.
With all that, I could power my entire army forever! Bot 13, you are the man! I am gonna rock this world.
Literally.
I'm gonna turn it into a rock about this big.
Where is the place? Bot 13, display coordinates.
Bot 13? Bot 13, I said display coordinates.
Access your stupid memory chip, and download your data file.
I built you, and I can unbuild you, you bucket of bolts.
The best things in life are more than just a list of their parts.
Bot 13! - I am Beep Boop.
- What?! No No! No, no, no, no, no! Cancel deletion.
No, reverse, reverse! Noooo!! You ruined everything! You You You piece of junk! Oh, what a disappointment.
I am Beep Boop.
I thought Beep Boop would be back by now.
Hm, so did I.
Buddy, don't you see? He didn't sell us out to Dominator after all.
Maybe you really did get through to that bot.
Huh.
I guess so.
Hey, look, a shooting star.
- Make a wish.
- Good luck, Beep Boop.
I needed to remind the universe how evil and awesome I am.
So I ordered the Watchdogs to make a propaganda film using the most sophisticated and respected art form in the universe.
This is to impress Dominator, isn't it? What?! No! But if she happens to see this, and finally realize how awesome and kissable I am, so be it.
Now shut up.
I want to hear what I sound like as a cartoon character.
Today shall be the final reckoning as I, Lord Hater, the greatest in the galaxy, finally become the greatest in the galaxy.
Dead on.
Great casting, Watchdogs.
I've located the all-powerful staff of power.
Ooh, sounds powerful.
The staff of power is so powerful, it can do the impossible make me even more powerful than I am now.
It will do this by charging me with a power which I will use to power up, thus giving me more power than I currently have.
Power! Solid writing, too.
- Peepers! - Y-Yes, sir.
Oh, no, my glasses.
Are you kidding? This is totally inaccurate.
This is a terrible plan.
It'll never work.
Seems pretty accurate to me.
There.
Viper Mountain.
Now no one shall stop me from getting the staff of power.
Ah, not so fast, Hater.
- Emperor Awesome? - The staff of power will be mine.
Watchdogs, attack! - Oh, come on.
- Oh, yeah! Get him! Whoo! Wow, what an impressive fight.
Awesome doesn't stand a chance.
We should stop describing it and watch in silence.
What's going on? Why aren't I seeing all my cool moves? We kind of blew all our animation budget on the Watchdog fight.
We thought it was more important to the story.
Finally, the staff of power is mine! And I win, just like in real life.
Dominator's gonna love I mean Great work, guys.
Hey, Hatey.
Oh, no.
You didn't.
Hater, it's me, your old pal.
- They totally did.
- You put Wander in my cartoon?! I don't know about this, Wander.
It seems like a baaaa-ad idea.
Oh, that is perfect! You nailed him! Oh, and I was totally gonna destroy you guys.
What happens? Oh, don't tell me.
No spoilers, but I bet I destroy them with my staff of power.
Finally, I can now destroy you, Wander, with my staff of power.
Knew it!! Pew, pew, pew, pew! Oh, yeah! Yeah! Duh, but I just wanted to sing you a song.
Banjo! Wait.
What's going on? Ow.
Ooh.
Ow.
Ow! Ouch.
Oh! Ouch.
Ow! Oof.
Ow, ow! No, please, stop.
My back-up back-up glasses.
Oh, no.
These Watchdogs are too tough.
I'm done for.
Wander, help! I am the Wanderer! What?! Oh, I get it.
You made Wander all strong so it will be more impressive when I finally beat him.
This is a smart cartoon.
This ends now.
Not if I can help it.
This seems like it's going on for a while.
Uh, yeah.
We were 15 seconds short, so we had to pad it out.
Just give it a minute.
Any second now.
Yeah! Go, me! Although I could've done it so many times before this time, now, because I am so much more powerful this time, this is the time when I will finally destroy you, Wander.
This is the time to die! Yes! Guys, I think I've got something real special here.
But, Hater, all I ever wanted was to be your friend.
Wait, what? I just wanted to be your friend in the hopes it would stop you from bein' so evil.
Wow.
All of a sudden, out of nowhere, I've come to realize that I have a tendency to compensate for my insecurity and loneliness by being evil and scary.
But you, Wander, saw the one thing that I really needed was not an army or planets or power No, no, no, no, no! but a friend.
Take my hand, friend - # We'll skip through the flowers # - What's going on?! Because our friendship - This is too good! - # Is the real staff of power # My heart is dancing Each day's a fantasy I said I wanted this to be true to life! All you did was make a cartoon where I almost succeed, then Wander shows up, tries to be my friend, and ruins everything! - Yeah, but - That's what always happens.
Burn it.
Burn it all! Never let anybody see this cartoon ever! Especially not Dominator.
Well, sir, we would, but we're broadcasting this live.
And ratings are through the roof.
What? No! We gotta animate a new ending where I destroy Wander.
Animation is so hard! People who do this for a living deserve more credit and respect! Great day, buddy.
What do you say we end it with a big old hug? Only if it's the biggest.
Aw, it's okay, Hater.
I think this show is amazing! Aaah! Gotta change the ending right now! Too bad.
I think Lord Hater would really like - the twist ending.
- Twist ending? You fool.
This was all a trick.
What better way to crush your spirits than to make you think we were actually friends? My spirits are crushed.
Now before an audience of billions, I will finally destroy you.
You're putting me on your TV show? Oh, that's awful sweet of you.
What? No.
Don't step on my lines.
Nooooo!! Ugh.
Lame.
It's the Mystery Kids Mysteries.
This week, the gang solves the case of Mavis' haunted sweatshirt.
Crikeys! Driving.
Mysteries.
Ruff, ruff.
Ruff.
I'm a dog, dudes.
Now that's a cartoon.
Hi, boys and girls.
I'm TV's Wander.
Lord Hater sure wanted that staff of power, but what he really wanted all along was a friend.
Well, actually, that was just a trick - to destroy you, Wander.
- Oh, right.
But he sure worked hard to get there, - and if you work hard, too - Not really.
His Watchdogs did most of the fightin' for him.
Oh, right.
So then the lesson was uh Don't know.
It sure was funny, though.
But there's nothin' funny about bicycle safety.
Always wear a helmet.
That's just good horse sense.
Probes, get in here! Oh, please tell me one of you found a non-lame planet to dominate.
We're running low on Volcanium X.
You, Bot 42, show me what you've got.
Scouting Measlon 3.
Trace elements detected.
Population zero.
Seriously? Just one planet? And this useless hunk of rock is the best you've got? I wouldn't even get out of bed to destroy this.
Recommendation: Do not dominate.
Gee, ya think? Bot 13, show this poor, pathetic bot how it's done.
Scouted: Thebulon 9.
Volcanium X detected.
Scouted: Strualiax.
Volcanium X detected.
Scouted: Aggrothia.
Volcanium X detected.
Recommendation: Dominate Yes! That is what I'm talkin' about.
Why can't the rest of you be more like Bot 13? As for you, you've disappointed me for the last time! Now the rest of you, get back to work! Affirmative, Lord Dominator.
Target acquired.
Seacironicus 12.
Commence scouting protocol.
Sylvia, look.
Sylvia, look at me! Sylvia, you're not looking! That's nice, Wander.
After all the running we've been doing lately, I'm gonna make the most of this place before Dominator wrecks it, too.
Good golly, I am so sorry.
Are you a Dominator probe? Still, the poor guy sure looks like he needs some help.
Hello there.
You okay? What's your name? Beep Boop, huh? Nice to meet you, Beep Boop.
Folks call me Wander.
What brings you round these parts? Explore planet.
Identify planet's valuable resources.
Hey, me, too.
Aw, you don't seem so bad.
Wanna be travel pals? Right! Sylvia, I'd like you to meet Wander, buddy, I promise to be super interested after my post-sleep nap.
Why don't you go check out the boardwalk? Sure thing, Syl.
Come on, Beep Boop.
Yeah, beep boop, wazzle fazzle.
Whatever A vacation's twice as fun when you have a travel pal to share it with.
Scanning for Volcanium X.
Volcanium X detected.
Great idea, Beep Boop.
I love games.
Volcanium X detected.
Hmm.
I really think it's that one.
Oh, well, better luck next time.
Volcanium X.
Eggs? Oh, you're hungry.
It's kind of hot for eggs, but I know just what you need.
Analyzing.
Sample consists of sugar, dairy substances, c-c-corn syrup.
Ice cream isn't just a bunch of ingredients.
It's the smiles of children.
The joy of a delicious cold treat on a hot day.
The best things in life are more than just a list of their parts.
But between you and me, the secret ingredient is love! Volcanium X detected.
What is it, travel pal? Volcanium X detected.
Oh, I get it.
Oh, you look great! - Let's try on everything! - Negative, negat Whoo-hoo! Beep Boop, you've been such an amazing travel pal, so I got you a present.
I saw how much you wanted it, so I went back and I won it for you.
Volcanium X! Wander, where are you, buddy? A Dominator bot? Wander, no! Well, hey, Sylvia.
Meet my friend Beep Boop.
Friend? That hunk of metal is one of Dominator's probes.
Well, sure, on the outside.
And on the inside, it's all lava and lasers, and a computer brain programmed only for destruction.
He also likes ice cream, and making silly faces, and Wander! That thing is gonna signal Dominator to come destroy this planet with us on it.
Oh, Beep Boop loves this place.
He would never do anything Volcanium X obtained.
System repair in progress.
like that? Beep Boop! Stop! Please don't leave.
We had so much fun today, didn't we? We could have fun tomorrow, too, if you wanted.
Beep Boop! Get a grip, buddy.
That's an evil robot.
He's not evil.
He's my pal, and he'll be back.
- I know it.
- Yeah, back to destroy this planet.
We need to warn people to get outta here before Dominator shows up.
- I'm not leaving without Beep Boop.
- Wander.
Ugh.
Bot 13, report.
You better have something good for me.
What? No way! No one planet has that much Volcanium X.
With all that, I could power my entire army forever! Bot 13, you are the man! I am gonna rock this world.
Literally.
I'm gonna turn it into a rock about this big.
Where is the place? Bot 13, display coordinates.
Bot 13? Bot 13, I said display coordinates.
Access your stupid memory chip, and download your data file.
I built you, and I can unbuild you, you bucket of bolts.
The best things in life are more than just a list of their parts.
Bot 13! - I am Beep Boop.
- What?! No No! No, no, no, no, no! Cancel deletion.
No, reverse, reverse! Noooo!! You ruined everything! You You You piece of junk! Oh, what a disappointment.
I am Beep Boop.
I thought Beep Boop would be back by now.
Hm, so did I.
Buddy, don't you see? He didn't sell us out to Dominator after all.
Maybe you really did get through to that bot.
Huh.
I guess so.
Hey, look, a shooting star.
- Make a wish.
- Good luck, Beep Boop.