Sherri (2009) s01e08 Episode Script
Stronger
la, la, la, la la, la, la, la la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la Ooh! I am so excited You get to be a pirate for halloween.
Yeah, but i'm gonna be a good pirate, Not like those pirates off the coast of somalia.
Bo, how do you even know about those? Mr.
Jones told us in current events.
No, you're gonna be the fun kind.
You're gonna be the "yo, ho, ho, and a bottle of rum" pirate.
Mr.
Jones says alcohol's an addiction.
Why is this even coming up in school? Because mr.
Jones had to go on vacation For 90 days.
Well, maybe next year, you'll be going to a new school.
[ Knock on door .]
Ooh, thank god.
That's your father.
Never thought i'd say that again.
Hey, happy halloween.
Daddy! What's happening, baby? Thanks for picking up the pumpkin stuff.
Come on, you know how much i love halloween.
This one's even bigger than last year's.
Well, every year you get bigger, Your pumpkin should get bigger, too.
Bo, go get ready for school.
So, is his costume all set? I just have to pick up his striped shirt.
I cut a pair of his old pants, And he's already got the parrot.
You're always good about that stuff, sherri.
Oh, bo was so cute.
He wanted to see if the parrot could fly.
It couldn't.
His head is taped up now.
So, i'll pick bo up from school.
3:15.
Room 24.
Did you know about mr.
Jones? And he was so good at current events.
You know, sherri, When i bring bo home to carve the pumpkin, It would be a lot easier and i don't mean to intrude If i had a key.
And you would and i don't mean to intrude If you hadn't cheated on me with paula and gotten her pregnant.
Right.
So the key will be with mr.
Neal.
Who's mr.
Neal? The old guy across the hall.
You mean that weirdo who took bo's ball and wouldn't give it back? He hasn't left his apartment since christmas.
So you know he'll be there.
So, have you decided what you want to do about trick-Or-Treating? Oh, i don't know.
What do you mean you don't know? Sherri, it's tradition.
We always go together.
Except we're not together.
Well, will you at least think about it? I'll let you know tonight.
I'm ready.
All right, let's go, baby.
All right, here's your backpack, inside's your lunch.
And i packed you an extra juice box.
I can't wait for halloween! [ Chuckles .]
And i can't wait to numb my feelings with candy.
Thank you very much.
Hey, sherri.
You want half my meatball, egg, cheese, and pepper hero? Uh, thank you, but just hearing about that sandwich Just gave me a heart attack.
And i have a lunch date.
Mm, you and the doctor have been spending a lot of time together, huh? Mm, lunch with the doc sounds sexy.
I don't know how sexy it can be In the allotted 45-Minute lunch break.
Oh, 44.
It's not that short.
My cousin stole my boyfriend And gave him back to me in half that time.
Yeah, and you know what? He was better for it.
And on that note, i'm leaving.
Hey, sherri.
Hi, donna.
Uh, how's it going? It's not going so good.
They found asbestos in my hope chest.
Bye, donna.
Bye.
Oh, miss dickie, i need you to fill out Your birthday celebration preference form.
Why do we have to go through this dance every year? H.
R.
Requires That all low- To mid-Level employees' birthdays Be acknowledged.
It boosts morale, and we're cutting dental.
If you could just mark your preferences.
My preference is to forget about my birthday.
I hear ya.
I turned 28 this year.
I could barely get out of bed i was so depressed.
You're 28? I know i look a little older.
My body rejects iron.
Well, well, well.
It's summer's birthday tomorrow.
You were born on halloween? Yes, and i'd rather not talk about it.
Having your birthday on halloween really What is that expression? puts a burr in my saddle.
It's like on halloween, Everyone gets dressed up, has candy, has fun.
It's like it's everyone's birthday.
It never felt like a special day to me.
But, you know, now that i'm turning "28" yeah, i've learned to live with it and not expect anything.
However, if i could enact one law, It would be to move halloween from october 31st To april 8th my sister's birthday.
You know what? If everyone is gonna be picking ages around here, I'm gonna be 19.
[ Chuckles .]
I'm sorry about that restaurant.
Oh, that's okay.
Italian japanese sounds great on paper, But marinara sushi? Those people need to come up with a new dream.
[ Both chuckle .]
Well, i guess i should be getting back to work.
Really? You know, i, uh I don't have another patient until, uh Well, until i really want one.
[ Chuckles .]
What good's a waiting room if you can't make them wait? [ Chuckles .]
So, we on again for friday? Yes.
Lunch and a short exam.
[ Knock on door .]
Marie! I'm sorry.
Your 2:00 is here.
Kevin? Paula? What are you doing here? Is bo all right? He's fine.
Well, i know you don't need a pediatrician.
Dr.
Gregg and i just had lunch.
We're dating.
Really? Since when? About a month and a half, But i'd have to check my day planner to really It's none of your damn business.
It's a really private matter.
What's she doing here? I'm having a baby.
I know that.
Kevin recommended dr.
Gregg so highly, I wanted him to be my pediatrician.
I'm just a few exits behind you folks.
You're with him? Yes.
Well, no.
Well, he's being a really great guy about this baby, But, no, we're not together.
I guess you could say we're friends with medical benefits.
You're dating our son's pediatrician? Oh, ho.
You do not want to go down that road.
That is a scary road.
People die on that road.
And nobody comes looking for them Because they never should have went down that road.
You know what's a great road? The road to prenatal health.
[ Chuckles .]
Are we all staying for this? Can i sit down? Maybe i want to sit down.
Well, you can sit down.
Don't you tell me what i can or can't do.
We just got new chairs.
We can all sit down.
This is the only doctor you could find? You don't have the internet? He's an excellent doctor.
Oh, thank you.
You know, i have a very basic philosophy not now.
Just when i think you're done messing up my life, You find a new and exciting way.
Thank you for lunch.
I like that you seem so close to your patients.
Oh.
Miss dickie, do you think i enjoy Being in charge of birthdays? Stop harassing me, okay? I don't want a party.
Every day, i have to wheel my father Around the block in a wagon just to get air.
And he thinks i'm the mailman.
Please let this be easy.
You know, i had a birthday party once.
Uh-Oh.
She doesn't want to talk about it again.
And i wanted a party where no one had to go out for candy.
We were gonna make our own sundaes.
Yeah, for once, it was gonna be my day.
But when they rolled out "summer's sundae bar," The three kids who were there and my sister Left to go trick-Or-Treating Because they cared more about halloween than me.
What kind of cake? This is ridiculous.
White cake, vanilla frosting, balloons.
One balloon.
Budget cuts.
Well, can she at least get a banner with her balloon? No.
How about ice cream with the cake? No.
Who put you in charge? No! Summer, do you really not want a party, Or are you just being like my aunt denise And saying you don't want a party, And then when you don't get one, You're gonna stab yourself in the leg with a fork And we're gonna have to go visit you in the hospital? Yeah, i've never met your aunt denise, But i'm gonna go out on a limb here And say i'm nothing like her.
But, no, i don't want a party.
Both: she wants a party! [ Both laugh .]
[ Door opens .]
mommy? Oh, hey, sweetie.
You working on your pumpkin? We're carving out a hollow head.
Oh! Too easy.
Go show daddy your hook hand.
Yo, ho, ho! [ Chuckles .]
speaking of "yo ho," Where do you get off bringing paula to my pediatrician? I thought we weren't gonna argue around bo.
Did you not just see me send him out of the room? I know you know what a hook looks like.
Sherri, i just took her to dr.
Gregg To do the right thing.
We are not a couple.
She is doing this on her own.
Oh, you mean like me? We're not a couple, either.
And i wouldn't be doing this on my own If paula wasn't doing that on her own.
You sure got the magic touch.
You know, that's a real low blow.
Oh! That's my oh, hey, baby! You know, give me that.
I will fix that for you.
No, that's okay.
Go put this with the rest of the parrot, And mommy will glue it on later.
Come on! We're gonna fix you, parrot! Yeah, we're gonna fix your parrot.
Yeah, fix the parrot.
Well, obviously, we're not going trick-Or-Treating together.
Obviously.
Yeah, so, this is how it'll go down.
I'll take him for the first hour.
You can have him after he's so jacked-Up on sugar, He's bouncing off the walls.
Oh, terrific.
Then you can peel him off the ceiling and put him to bed.
Great.
My pleasure.
Love to.
And then when his tummy's hurting from all the candy, Maybe your boyfriend can take care of him.
Oh, if he's not too busy taking care of your baby mama.
Let's carve pumpkins! Yay, pumpkins! Yay, pumpkins! Hey, come to summer's party this afternoon.
Hope to see you at summer's party.
There you go.
Uh How do i make myself more clear? I don't want a birthday party.
And i'm not saying it 'cause i secretly do.
I openly don't.
Well, it's too late.
We've already sent out invitations.
No, not too late.
Here they are.
And there they go.
[ Chuckles .]
Hey, we worked really hard on those.
And still you invited people to "summer's birthday parpy.
" Angie.
You rushed me.
Two words spell check.
It's actually one word.
Why can't you just accept that i don't want a birthday party? Look into my eyes, okay? These are the eyes of someone who doesn't want a party.
Hey, one pupil's bigger than the other.
Yeah, it's because i'm part wolf.
Wow, that is so cool.
So that you can accept.
Please, no "parpy.
" You know what? We'll just send out evites.
She can't stop us from using the computer.
I'll crash the server.
Don't think i won't.
She definitely wants a party.
Oh, yeah.
[ Laughs .]
My son wants to be a pirate for halloween.
You know how much that costs at the costume store? $80.
You want to know what i wore every year for halloween? A sheet with two holes in it.
One year i was a ghost.
The next year i was a snowman.
Ghost, snowman, ghost, snowman.
One year, i got really creative I was a bed with two holes in it.
Sherri? Hi.
Oh, hell no.
I'm glad i ran into you.
I've been wanting to apologize about yesterday at the doctor's.
And when i saw you here, i just had to say something.
Paula, i do not understand why we keep running into each other.
It's my fault.
I asked kevin to help me with all this baby stuff, And he gave me a list of all the places you go.
Did he also give you the times? Maybe the universe wanted us to talk.
Don't pin it on the universe.
Pin it on kevin and use a big pin.
I figure if i do what you do, i'll be okay, Because you're such a great mother.
Well, i'm not great.
Kevin says you're the best, that you have a gift.
Well, i'm naturally maternal.
There's a lot of books out there, And i'm not saying they're not any good.
I'm just saying i don't need them, Because i always knew i wanted to have a family Like the one i used to have.
I'm sorry.
And you have every right to hate me.
I know i've caused you a lot of pain, And i don't want to cause you any more.
Hang on.
You want the one Where the feet, the hands, and the head are covered.
You don't want to have to worry about shoes, mittens, and hats.
That makes sense.
Thank you.
Okay.
Goodbye now.
Oh, put that back.
You want the cotton onesie.
And these baby running shoes these are a hoax.
The baby can't even hold its head up.
It's not going anywhere.
Do you have a musical toy? You need a musical toy, But not one that plays "pop! Goes the weasel.
" Let me tell you what happens That weasel pops, the baby cries for the next six hours.
This one you might want.
Eh.
This one, yeah, speeds their development.
You want one of those.
Guess who i was just with.
Dr.
Gregg.
I can see it.
You have that glow.
I was with paula.
Then why do you have that glow? Sherri, what did you do? Do we need to get our stories straight? We were shopping together.
Nobody's gonna buy that.
What is it about that girl? I should hate her, i want to hate her, but i can't.
She's like a pregnant kitten Who needs help buying baby clothes.
How could i hurt her? Sherri, i am so proud of you.
You have the most generous, forgiving spirit.
Yeah.
I still want to push kevin off a bridge.
I just can't decide which one.
The brooklyn bridge is convenient, But i'm not sure it's high enough.
Maybe not the most generous, forgiving spirit.
This was always our favorite time of the year Playing football, carving pumpkins, Playing in leaves.
And kevin took all of that away from us.
And i resent having to pretend it's okay because it isn't.
Well, you know what they say about resentment It's like drinking poison And waiting for the other person to die.
How long you held that one in your back pocket? Hey, i'm married to the reverend.
We got this stuff printed on our toilet paper.
It's one thing to read it.
It's another thing to do it.
Well, the situation isn't gonna change, so you have to.
I wouldn't know how.
You're an actress.
Put on an act and wait for your feelings to catch up, hmm? If not for you, then for bo.
Just in case my feelings don't catch up, How high is the manhattan bridge? Sherri [ Laughs .]
I'm going to the break room.
Can i get anybody anything? No.
No, i'm good.
Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! I told you no party.
Uh-Oh.
[ Voice breaking .]
but i'm so glad you didn't listen! Oh, it's summer's sundae bar.
This is the nicest thing that anybody has ever done for me.
It's the only thing that anyone's ever done for me.
I was just happy i didn't have to tie my father to a bed to go out and get a cake Donna.
'Cause last year, he got loose when i had to Donna.
Turn on the music.
Oh, dancing on company time? Do we dare? everybody dance now everybody dance now give me the music give me the music give me the music I love this song! everybody dance now All: go, donna.
Go, donna.
Go, donna.
Go, donna.
Go, donna.
Go, donna.
[ Cheering .]
Go, angie.
Go, angie.
Go, angie.
Go, angie.
[ Cheering .]
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Come on, bo.
Let's see the whole thing put together.
[ Gasps .]
oh! What do we say when we go trick-Or-Treating? Thank you.
Before you get the candy.
[ As pirate .]
your gold or your candy.
Arrrrr! Arrr! When's daddy getting here? I want to go trick-Or-Treating.
Baby, remember what we discussed.
I'm gonna go with you first, Then daddy's gonna stay here with the trick-Or-Treaters, And then we'll switch off.
Why can't we all go together? [ Knock on door .]
Oh, look.
Our first trick-Or-Treater or a burglar.
Who cares? [ As pirate .]
ahoy, mateys.
Shiver me timbers! Mr.
Neal: get out of here, you kids! Sorry, mr.
Neal.
It's gonna be a long night for that old man.
Daddy, you're a pirate, too! That i am, swabbie.
Well, you guys better shove off.
Go get your trick-Or-Treat bucket, bo.
I'll stay here and man the candy, And i'll see you in an hour.
That is the plan.
Bo You are the best-Looking pirate i have ever seen.
When you and your mommy come back, You and i are gonna go out and have a good time, all right? Now give me an "arrr!" Arrr! Arrr! Now, you have a good time, all right? I'll see you in a little bit.
No.
I want us all to go together.
Are you sure? Well, like you said, it's our tradition.
Arrr! Thank you.
All right, so, we all go together.
Yay! Yay! Okay, we'll put the candy by the door.
It'll be the honor system.
[ Laughs .]
Give me an "arrr!" Arrr! All right.
You know something? You look good.
Saucy wench? That's what it said on the box.
You look good, too.
Yeah, i know.
Good enough to walk the plank.
You said it, not me.
[ Door opens .]
[ Door closes .]
Yeah, but i'm gonna be a good pirate, Not like those pirates off the coast of somalia.
Bo, how do you even know about those? Mr.
Jones told us in current events.
No, you're gonna be the fun kind.
You're gonna be the "yo, ho, ho, and a bottle of rum" pirate.
Mr.
Jones says alcohol's an addiction.
Why is this even coming up in school? Because mr.
Jones had to go on vacation For 90 days.
Well, maybe next year, you'll be going to a new school.
[ Knock on door .]
Ooh, thank god.
That's your father.
Never thought i'd say that again.
Hey, happy halloween.
Daddy! What's happening, baby? Thanks for picking up the pumpkin stuff.
Come on, you know how much i love halloween.
This one's even bigger than last year's.
Well, every year you get bigger, Your pumpkin should get bigger, too.
Bo, go get ready for school.
So, is his costume all set? I just have to pick up his striped shirt.
I cut a pair of his old pants, And he's already got the parrot.
You're always good about that stuff, sherri.
Oh, bo was so cute.
He wanted to see if the parrot could fly.
It couldn't.
His head is taped up now.
So, i'll pick bo up from school.
3:15.
Room 24.
Did you know about mr.
Jones? And he was so good at current events.
You know, sherri, When i bring bo home to carve the pumpkin, It would be a lot easier and i don't mean to intrude If i had a key.
And you would and i don't mean to intrude If you hadn't cheated on me with paula and gotten her pregnant.
Right.
So the key will be with mr.
Neal.
Who's mr.
Neal? The old guy across the hall.
You mean that weirdo who took bo's ball and wouldn't give it back? He hasn't left his apartment since christmas.
So you know he'll be there.
So, have you decided what you want to do about trick-Or-Treating? Oh, i don't know.
What do you mean you don't know? Sherri, it's tradition.
We always go together.
Except we're not together.
Well, will you at least think about it? I'll let you know tonight.
I'm ready.
All right, let's go, baby.
All right, here's your backpack, inside's your lunch.
And i packed you an extra juice box.
I can't wait for halloween! [ Chuckles .]
And i can't wait to numb my feelings with candy.
Thank you very much.
Hey, sherri.
You want half my meatball, egg, cheese, and pepper hero? Uh, thank you, but just hearing about that sandwich Just gave me a heart attack.
And i have a lunch date.
Mm, you and the doctor have been spending a lot of time together, huh? Mm, lunch with the doc sounds sexy.
I don't know how sexy it can be In the allotted 45-Minute lunch break.
Oh, 44.
It's not that short.
My cousin stole my boyfriend And gave him back to me in half that time.
Yeah, and you know what? He was better for it.
And on that note, i'm leaving.
Hey, sherri.
Hi, donna.
Uh, how's it going? It's not going so good.
They found asbestos in my hope chest.
Bye, donna.
Bye.
Oh, miss dickie, i need you to fill out Your birthday celebration preference form.
Why do we have to go through this dance every year? H.
R.
Requires That all low- To mid-Level employees' birthdays Be acknowledged.
It boosts morale, and we're cutting dental.
If you could just mark your preferences.
My preference is to forget about my birthday.
I hear ya.
I turned 28 this year.
I could barely get out of bed i was so depressed.
You're 28? I know i look a little older.
My body rejects iron.
Well, well, well.
It's summer's birthday tomorrow.
You were born on halloween? Yes, and i'd rather not talk about it.
Having your birthday on halloween really What is that expression? puts a burr in my saddle.
It's like on halloween, Everyone gets dressed up, has candy, has fun.
It's like it's everyone's birthday.
It never felt like a special day to me.
But, you know, now that i'm turning "28" yeah, i've learned to live with it and not expect anything.
However, if i could enact one law, It would be to move halloween from october 31st To april 8th my sister's birthday.
You know what? If everyone is gonna be picking ages around here, I'm gonna be 19.
[ Chuckles .]
I'm sorry about that restaurant.
Oh, that's okay.
Italian japanese sounds great on paper, But marinara sushi? Those people need to come up with a new dream.
[ Both chuckle .]
Well, i guess i should be getting back to work.
Really? You know, i, uh I don't have another patient until, uh Well, until i really want one.
[ Chuckles .]
What good's a waiting room if you can't make them wait? [ Chuckles .]
So, we on again for friday? Yes.
Lunch and a short exam.
[ Knock on door .]
Marie! I'm sorry.
Your 2:00 is here.
Kevin? Paula? What are you doing here? Is bo all right? He's fine.
Well, i know you don't need a pediatrician.
Dr.
Gregg and i just had lunch.
We're dating.
Really? Since when? About a month and a half, But i'd have to check my day planner to really It's none of your damn business.
It's a really private matter.
What's she doing here? I'm having a baby.
I know that.
Kevin recommended dr.
Gregg so highly, I wanted him to be my pediatrician.
I'm just a few exits behind you folks.
You're with him? Yes.
Well, no.
Well, he's being a really great guy about this baby, But, no, we're not together.
I guess you could say we're friends with medical benefits.
You're dating our son's pediatrician? Oh, ho.
You do not want to go down that road.
That is a scary road.
People die on that road.
And nobody comes looking for them Because they never should have went down that road.
You know what's a great road? The road to prenatal health.
[ Chuckles .]
Are we all staying for this? Can i sit down? Maybe i want to sit down.
Well, you can sit down.
Don't you tell me what i can or can't do.
We just got new chairs.
We can all sit down.
This is the only doctor you could find? You don't have the internet? He's an excellent doctor.
Oh, thank you.
You know, i have a very basic philosophy not now.
Just when i think you're done messing up my life, You find a new and exciting way.
Thank you for lunch.
I like that you seem so close to your patients.
Oh.
Miss dickie, do you think i enjoy Being in charge of birthdays? Stop harassing me, okay? I don't want a party.
Every day, i have to wheel my father Around the block in a wagon just to get air.
And he thinks i'm the mailman.
Please let this be easy.
You know, i had a birthday party once.
Uh-Oh.
She doesn't want to talk about it again.
And i wanted a party where no one had to go out for candy.
We were gonna make our own sundaes.
Yeah, for once, it was gonna be my day.
But when they rolled out "summer's sundae bar," The three kids who were there and my sister Left to go trick-Or-Treating Because they cared more about halloween than me.
What kind of cake? This is ridiculous.
White cake, vanilla frosting, balloons.
One balloon.
Budget cuts.
Well, can she at least get a banner with her balloon? No.
How about ice cream with the cake? No.
Who put you in charge? No! Summer, do you really not want a party, Or are you just being like my aunt denise And saying you don't want a party, And then when you don't get one, You're gonna stab yourself in the leg with a fork And we're gonna have to go visit you in the hospital? Yeah, i've never met your aunt denise, But i'm gonna go out on a limb here And say i'm nothing like her.
But, no, i don't want a party.
Both: she wants a party! [ Both laugh .]
[ Door opens .]
mommy? Oh, hey, sweetie.
You working on your pumpkin? We're carving out a hollow head.
Oh! Too easy.
Go show daddy your hook hand.
Yo, ho, ho! [ Chuckles .]
speaking of "yo ho," Where do you get off bringing paula to my pediatrician? I thought we weren't gonna argue around bo.
Did you not just see me send him out of the room? I know you know what a hook looks like.
Sherri, i just took her to dr.
Gregg To do the right thing.
We are not a couple.
She is doing this on her own.
Oh, you mean like me? We're not a couple, either.
And i wouldn't be doing this on my own If paula wasn't doing that on her own.
You sure got the magic touch.
You know, that's a real low blow.
Oh! That's my oh, hey, baby! You know, give me that.
I will fix that for you.
No, that's okay.
Go put this with the rest of the parrot, And mommy will glue it on later.
Come on! We're gonna fix you, parrot! Yeah, we're gonna fix your parrot.
Yeah, fix the parrot.
Well, obviously, we're not going trick-Or-Treating together.
Obviously.
Yeah, so, this is how it'll go down.
I'll take him for the first hour.
You can have him after he's so jacked-Up on sugar, He's bouncing off the walls.
Oh, terrific.
Then you can peel him off the ceiling and put him to bed.
Great.
My pleasure.
Love to.
And then when his tummy's hurting from all the candy, Maybe your boyfriend can take care of him.
Oh, if he's not too busy taking care of your baby mama.
Let's carve pumpkins! Yay, pumpkins! Yay, pumpkins! Hey, come to summer's party this afternoon.
Hope to see you at summer's party.
There you go.
Uh How do i make myself more clear? I don't want a birthday party.
And i'm not saying it 'cause i secretly do.
I openly don't.
Well, it's too late.
We've already sent out invitations.
No, not too late.
Here they are.
And there they go.
[ Chuckles .]
Hey, we worked really hard on those.
And still you invited people to "summer's birthday parpy.
" Angie.
You rushed me.
Two words spell check.
It's actually one word.
Why can't you just accept that i don't want a birthday party? Look into my eyes, okay? These are the eyes of someone who doesn't want a party.
Hey, one pupil's bigger than the other.
Yeah, it's because i'm part wolf.
Wow, that is so cool.
So that you can accept.
Please, no "parpy.
" You know what? We'll just send out evites.
She can't stop us from using the computer.
I'll crash the server.
Don't think i won't.
She definitely wants a party.
Oh, yeah.
[ Laughs .]
My son wants to be a pirate for halloween.
You know how much that costs at the costume store? $80.
You want to know what i wore every year for halloween? A sheet with two holes in it.
One year i was a ghost.
The next year i was a snowman.
Ghost, snowman, ghost, snowman.
One year, i got really creative I was a bed with two holes in it.
Sherri? Hi.
Oh, hell no.
I'm glad i ran into you.
I've been wanting to apologize about yesterday at the doctor's.
And when i saw you here, i just had to say something.
Paula, i do not understand why we keep running into each other.
It's my fault.
I asked kevin to help me with all this baby stuff, And he gave me a list of all the places you go.
Did he also give you the times? Maybe the universe wanted us to talk.
Don't pin it on the universe.
Pin it on kevin and use a big pin.
I figure if i do what you do, i'll be okay, Because you're such a great mother.
Well, i'm not great.
Kevin says you're the best, that you have a gift.
Well, i'm naturally maternal.
There's a lot of books out there, And i'm not saying they're not any good.
I'm just saying i don't need them, Because i always knew i wanted to have a family Like the one i used to have.
I'm sorry.
And you have every right to hate me.
I know i've caused you a lot of pain, And i don't want to cause you any more.
Hang on.
You want the one Where the feet, the hands, and the head are covered.
You don't want to have to worry about shoes, mittens, and hats.
That makes sense.
Thank you.
Okay.
Goodbye now.
Oh, put that back.
You want the cotton onesie.
And these baby running shoes these are a hoax.
The baby can't even hold its head up.
It's not going anywhere.
Do you have a musical toy? You need a musical toy, But not one that plays "pop! Goes the weasel.
" Let me tell you what happens That weasel pops, the baby cries for the next six hours.
This one you might want.
Eh.
This one, yeah, speeds their development.
You want one of those.
Guess who i was just with.
Dr.
Gregg.
I can see it.
You have that glow.
I was with paula.
Then why do you have that glow? Sherri, what did you do? Do we need to get our stories straight? We were shopping together.
Nobody's gonna buy that.
What is it about that girl? I should hate her, i want to hate her, but i can't.
She's like a pregnant kitten Who needs help buying baby clothes.
How could i hurt her? Sherri, i am so proud of you.
You have the most generous, forgiving spirit.
Yeah.
I still want to push kevin off a bridge.
I just can't decide which one.
The brooklyn bridge is convenient, But i'm not sure it's high enough.
Maybe not the most generous, forgiving spirit.
This was always our favorite time of the year Playing football, carving pumpkins, Playing in leaves.
And kevin took all of that away from us.
And i resent having to pretend it's okay because it isn't.
Well, you know what they say about resentment It's like drinking poison And waiting for the other person to die.
How long you held that one in your back pocket? Hey, i'm married to the reverend.
We got this stuff printed on our toilet paper.
It's one thing to read it.
It's another thing to do it.
Well, the situation isn't gonna change, so you have to.
I wouldn't know how.
You're an actress.
Put on an act and wait for your feelings to catch up, hmm? If not for you, then for bo.
Just in case my feelings don't catch up, How high is the manhattan bridge? Sherri [ Laughs .]
I'm going to the break room.
Can i get anybody anything? No.
No, i'm good.
Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! Surprise! I told you no party.
Uh-Oh.
[ Voice breaking .]
but i'm so glad you didn't listen! Oh, it's summer's sundae bar.
This is the nicest thing that anybody has ever done for me.
It's the only thing that anyone's ever done for me.
I was just happy i didn't have to tie my father to a bed to go out and get a cake Donna.
'Cause last year, he got loose when i had to Donna.
Turn on the music.
Oh, dancing on company time? Do we dare? everybody dance now everybody dance now give me the music give me the music give me the music I love this song! everybody dance now All: go, donna.
Go, donna.
Go, donna.
Go, donna.
Go, donna.
Go, donna.
[ Cheering .]
Go, angie.
Go, angie.
Go, angie.
Go, angie.
[ Cheering .]
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Go, sherri.
Come on, bo.
Let's see the whole thing put together.
[ Gasps .]
oh! What do we say when we go trick-Or-Treating? Thank you.
Before you get the candy.
[ As pirate .]
your gold or your candy.
Arrrrr! Arrr! When's daddy getting here? I want to go trick-Or-Treating.
Baby, remember what we discussed.
I'm gonna go with you first, Then daddy's gonna stay here with the trick-Or-Treaters, And then we'll switch off.
Why can't we all go together? [ Knock on door .]
Oh, look.
Our first trick-Or-Treater or a burglar.
Who cares? [ As pirate .]
ahoy, mateys.
Shiver me timbers! Mr.
Neal: get out of here, you kids! Sorry, mr.
Neal.
It's gonna be a long night for that old man.
Daddy, you're a pirate, too! That i am, swabbie.
Well, you guys better shove off.
Go get your trick-Or-Treat bucket, bo.
I'll stay here and man the candy, And i'll see you in an hour.
That is the plan.
Bo You are the best-Looking pirate i have ever seen.
When you and your mommy come back, You and i are gonna go out and have a good time, all right? Now give me an "arrr!" Arrr! Arrr! Now, you have a good time, all right? I'll see you in a little bit.
No.
I want us all to go together.
Are you sure? Well, like you said, it's our tradition.
Arrr! Thank you.
All right, so, we all go together.
Yay! Yay! Okay, we'll put the candy by the door.
It'll be the honor system.
[ Laughs .]
Give me an "arrr!" Arrr! All right.
You know something? You look good.
Saucy wench? That's what it said on the box.
You look good, too.
Yeah, i know.
Good enough to walk the plank.
You said it, not me.
[ Door opens .]
[ Door closes .]