Super Crooks (2021) s01e08 Episode Script

The Union of Justice

1
So where's the target?
That's the dealer's hideout.
Disgusting.
He lives there?
Fuck 'em up good!
What?
The fuck are you?
Seriously?
Awesome!
Are these guys dead?
They're not dead,
but they're basket cases now.
Here's your share.
That's the last time we'll work with you.
What do you mean by that?
You scare us, girl.
Don't take it the wrong way!
To us, that kind of power is You know
Jerks.
Yeah.
Let's split the haul evenly.
You're that chick Kasey, aren't you?
I heard you turned all your pals
into basket cases over money.
What? That's disgusting. I never did that.
Is that right?
Sorry, but I ain't working with you.
Fuck off, you big wuss!
Don't hate yourself.
Lay down some rules.
What's with you? Buzz off, old man.
Your power is a treasure
that only you have.
How'd you know about my power?
Love it.
There's no need to hate it.
But lay down rules
for who to use it on and who not to.
Quit your lecturing!
Then only work with people
who can intuitively understand you.
That makes no sense.
Enough of the lecture.
You already understand what I mean.
You're freakin' disgusting.
So long.
I've got a good job for you.
It's something that only you can do.
You understand, don't you?
I think I just might understand.
There we go.
Honey. Sign the card
What's wrong?
Oh, sure.
There you go.
Are you on your honeymoon?
Can you tell?
Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Brown.
Welcome to the Plaza Hotel.
Thanks.
Sweetheart! Did you see the bathroom?
There are mirrors everywhere!
Talk about sexy!
Really?
That's nice.
What's that? Mr. and Mrs. Brown?
But we're just a pretend married couple.
Yeah, we are now, but
Do you mean
Around this time tomorrow,
it won't be pretend anymore.
Kasey.
Looks like we'll need to reserve a church.
Johnny!
Here. Tomorrow, our futures change.
Let's celebrate early.
We'll get out of this racket.
We won't be spending our lives
in Supermax like those other villains.
I won't ever let you go.
Johnny
I'm gettin' an erection!
Oh, you!
Raw's okay, right, Kasey?
Hey! Get the phone!
Goddammit!
Listen well! Get plenty of sleep
and don't drink a drop of liquor.
If you
Johnny?
What?
He hung up on me.
For god's sake!
Chelsea?
This place never changes.
Here's to the skyscrapers.
I can't sleep!
Not bad.
This carpet's really thick.
Cut it out!
They'll see through us!
What will they see?
That we're yokels.
That's true.
That hurts!
Sorry.
Cut it out! They'll see through us!
That's true.
Sheesh
Mommy! Wake up! It moved!
The last train will be departing soon.
Ouch! My back's killing me.
Where's the darn hotel?
Nine more hours?
I'll take two.
Two coming right up.
Mustard?
Thank you for coming.
Thanks.
Give me a hand out here.
What is this? A one-man operation?
Say
If it looks like those guys will kill me,
make me see a pleasant hallucination.
I'll take you to Wonderland
with a nice little rabbit.
That sounds nice.
Where do you want her to take you?
You want to be Christopher Robin?
No, thanks.
I don't need any hallucinations.
You see, I want to see
the real Kasey up to the very end.
Right?
Oh, you.
Sorry.
I see you're already off in wonderland.
Look!
It's The Utopian!
And that's Paragon!
And of course, he's with Ruby Red.
How lovely!
They make such a great couple!
What? Where's Brainwave?
Didn't you know?
He's in China to get some kind of award.
What? That's too bad.
Of course,
the most popular is The Utopian,
the leader of The Union of Justice.
And for their regular meeting
to be held today, Lady Liberty,
The Flare II, Paragon, Gladiator,
Molecule Master,
and other superheroes have gathered here.
There's a huge crowd in front of the HQ
hoping to catch sight of them.
And who's the final arrival?
Oh, there he is!
It's Praetorian.
His popularity has skyrocketed lately!
That will be all from me here.
I'll send it back to the studio.
Time to start the operation.
"Thunder Fighter"?
Never heard of him.
Hold on a second!
Oh, look at this!
It's The Necromancer's tomb.
Let's get a picture of this.
Okay!
This will get tons of likes!
Hey! What's happening?
What's that?
This is nuts.
The Necromancer
Did you get a photo?
No.
We're patrolling Valley Street now.
You see what?
That's ridiculous!
Leave those jokes for Halloween.
Fine! Now just calm down!
I'll get backup! What? Bicycles?
Hey!
- Holy shit!
- Are you serious?
This isn't the set of a movie!
But it's still just like Dawn of the Dead!
This is unbelievable!
Wait! What's that?
That zombie is flying!
What? In Pittsburgh? There's a what?
We're interrupting this live broadcast
to bring you breaking news.
The Necromancer is attacking
the downtown Pittsburgh area.
The Necromancer was
a notorious supervillain who used his
cursed powers to commit heinous crimes.
But he died nine years ago
and was buried in a tomb in Pittsburgh
Look at that!
The superheroes of
our Union of Justice
have all just flown off for Pittsburg!
That worked out well.
So this is their HQ?
Dang!
I've wanted to come here
ever since I was a kid!
Whoa!
It's just like it looks on TV!
Time to start our operation too.
Don't get scared, Sammy.
You too, buddy.
I hope you went to the bathroom.
Yes, that's very important.
Isn't that right, Johnny?
Don't talk about that. Let's go!
The plan is perfect.
Once we see the superheroes have left,
we'll first disable the security system.
Beforehand, we'll fabricate
security camera footage.
Once we're done with our work,
nobody will even know that we were there.
That's when Kasey comes in.
After that,
we just need to find the spoils.
But the time for doing that is limited.
It all depends on how well their act goes.
That's freakin' insane!
What is this, Tour de Pittsburgh?
But fast-moving zombies are so passé now.
This would blow Romero away.
Okay! In that case
Let there be light!
Neither of us needs any special effects.
It's the end of the world, ya know.
Look.
Here they come.
That's superheroes for you.
They're quick
when it comes to flashy trouble.
Yeah.
Now's when the real fun starts.
- Later, dudes.
- I'll have caramel macchiato.
Are you sure? Don't you have diabetes?
All right, where is it? Find it!
Hey!
This is Mister Rooster's Sword of Blood!
Over here is Thunder Fighter's buckle!
Awesome!
Seriously? Thunder Fighter?
Maybe they've got his mask too!
Don't get distracted by that dumb stuff.
It ain't dumb!
They're villain wrestlers
that we villains look up to!
Listen! What we're after is
Yeah, yeah. It's that thing
Count Orlok wants so badly.
That cursed helmet, right?
Hurry it up.
I'm gradually losing my concentration.
It'll be a piece of cake, partner.
I'm counting on you, partner.
This reminds me of
the time we broke into that
creepy Chinese mobster's wine cellar.
Don't screw up again
like you did that time.
Time out. I gotta use the restroom.
What? Are you kidding? You idiot!
Oh, um
Who are
I must be seeing things.
What?
How's this? They're worth 100,000 dollars.
But how come that guy didn't notice me?
I made him hallucinate.
Honey, you can do that? I never knew!
That's right.
Want me to make you hallucinate too?
Yeah, maybe not. I'm already
totally spellbound by you.
You're not afraid of my power?
Why? It's totally cool!
Oh, shut up. I got the runs that day
because of the tom yum the day before.
What? There it is!
We've found it! Ghost!
Right. So this is the magical helmet?
Leave this to me.
Must be yesterday's jjigae.
Praetorian! Good afternoon.
Huh? Is the meeting already over?
No, not at all.
They all left to handle some
serious trouble in Pittsburgh right now.
Pittsburgh?
The Necromancer and zombies?
You're going too, right?
What power do you have right now?
Now?
Now, I can hear people
even though I can't see them.
Really? Sharp ears! That's amazing!
Let's hightail it
before The Utopian and the others
realize they're fake zombies.
Yes. It's a very useful power.
What? Where are you going?
To the scene of the crime.
Am I hallucinating?
Don't think you can hide from me!
- Shit!
- What?
You're kidding me.
Unbelievable.
It wasn't my fault!
You morons.
Why would we display the real thing here?
What?
It's just like
the National Museum of Natural History.
All these things are replicas.
The real ones are stored in
an enormous secure underground vault.
It's a fake?
That was a close call.
Oh, it was just a prank.
Don't scare us like that.
The real one's in the basement! Ghost!
I'll get it this time!
We're almost out of time!
What kind of trick is this?
No!
It feels like someone's inside my head,
like in San Francisco.
There she is!
Kasey!
I've met you somewhere before.
You've got the wrong guy
It's not working.
Subtitle translation by: Brian Athey
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