The Prince (2021) s01e08 Episode Script
Owen
1
♪
♪
- Excuse me, you there, Mary.
- Yes, Your Majesty.
- Can you donate this
to a soup kitchen
and bring me something
I can fucking eat?
- Mummy, would you like
my eggs?
They're very yummy.
- Yeah, I want to eat
off your plate
like we live
in a fucking trailer park.
Do you ever listen to yourself?
- No, Mummy, I don't.
And it was actually
Camilla's idea
I offer you the eggs.
Please forgive me, darling.
I hate myself.
- Ma'am,
it's the prime minister.
- Hello?
Well, did you fuck her?
All right,
I'll take care of it.
You don't talk to anyone
until you get my call,
understand?
Thank you, Mary.
- Grandpa,
are you eating the paper?
- That's new.
- Well, I have an appointment.
Please excuse me.
Would you tell the children
I'll be home later?
- I'm sitting
right next to you.
- Where are you going?
- Out.
Don't worry, I'll be back
in time to watch the servants
put the children to bed
from my phone.
- That's a good mother,
hands-on.
- I was breastfed by a servant.
- Yes, but she watched.
- Is there anything you need
before I leave for my day off,
Your Royal Highness?
- Your day off?
Didn't you just have a day off?
When do you actually work?
- It's been
about a month, sir.
- Must be nice
to have your life.
All right, well,
go if you're going.
- If you need anything at all,
sir, don't hesitate--
- Owen, Owen, just leave,
for God's sake.
I think I'll be fine
without whatever it is
you think you do.
- Of course, sir.
- Bye-eee.
- Okay, now he's eating
the centerpiece.
- It's fine.
- Are you okay?
- Why haven't you
touched me lately?
- Can we not
talk about this now?
- Well, I'm off.
I'll see everyone tomorrow.
- Big plans, then, Owen?
- Oh, nothing much.
Well, ta-ta.
- Bye, Owen!
Have fun!
I'd go home and slit my throat
if I had to look after
that kid all day.
Don't.
- Nnow, then,
can I get anyone a nice cuppa?
Teddy?
- Yeah, thanks, Kev.
Fuckin' love Kev.
- Morning, Owen.
- Morning, Clive.
- Have a good day, Owen.
- You too, Clive.
♪
- Hello?
- Hey, is this a bad time?
- Of course not,
Your Royal Highness.
- So I found the socks.
I sent you back
a smiley emoji, by the way.
- Yes, I saw that.
- Oh, well,
you didn't respond.
- Morning, Owen!
- Morning, Dan!
I sent you
a thumbs-up on it, sir.
- Oh, okay,
I must have missed that.
Anyway,
I was wondering which--
- Hello, Owen.
- Hello, Faye!
- I was wondering
which remote I use
to go from Apple TV
back to cable.
- The small silver one, sir.
- Yeah, I tried that one.
- Fresh blackberries today,
Owen?
- I'll come by later for some,
Samuel.
- You're doing
that walk through town
like you're fucking Belle
in "Beauty and the Beast."
Jesus Christ,
do you know how annoying it is
for me on my end?
- I apologize, sir.
- Oh, okay, wait.
The silver one is working now.
- Splendid, sir.
- It wasn't before, though.
All right, well,
I'm gonna watch "Below Deck."
- Good morning, O--
- He's on the fucking phone!
Okay, well,
that's it on my end.
Enjoy your day off.
- If you need anything else--
- No, no, I'm good.
I'll talk to you later.
Ciao.
♪
- Hello?
- Hey. What are you doing?
- Just making
a cup of tea, sir.
- Cool. I'm having tea too.
So has it started raining
there yet?
- Not yet, no, sir.
- That's good. That's good.
Maybe it won't rain there,
day off and all that.
Ooh, are you in the kitchen?
Show me your kitchen.
- It's nothing much
to speak of,
Your Royal Highness.
- It's cute, O.
All right, well, I'll let you
get back to your tea.
- Goodbye, sir.
- Yup. See you tomorrow.
- Hello?
- Quick question.
How long is an avocado
good for?
- They're good
for several days, sir.
- So if it's a little brown,
it's still okay?
- Yes, that should be fine,
sir.
- Yeah, thought so.
Just checking.
Is that your garden?
- Yes.
It's very, very small.
- It's fucking adorable
is what it is.
Everything is so tiny
and cute.
It's like you live
in a dollhouse, O.
- It suits my needs, sir.
- Anyway, I gotta go,
but thanks for calling.
♪
- I don't have long.
I told William
I was serving porridge
to battered women.
- Then let's get to it.
So you're positive
you want to leave your husband?
- Yes! I've already found
a place to live.
And I'm applying for a job
at goop.
- Ooh, goop.
Well, I'll start working
on the papers, then.
- Nobody must know.
I fear for my life.
- Really?
- Well, not really,
but, you know, it's bad there.
- Can I ask,
what's the queen like?
Is she nice?
- She's a fucking nightmare.
I'll be in touch.
- Hello, sir.
- Hey.
I'm bored.
Anything going on over there?
- No, no, nothing at all.
- Hello, Owen.
Good to see ya.
- Hello, Toby.
- Well, if it isn't Owen.
- Hello, Vera.
- Ugh, now you're at Cheers.
- Where you been hidin', Owen?
You haven't called.
- Been meaning to, Vera.
Work.
Rock climbing.
- Rock climbing?
- Right.
Sure.
Usual?
- Please.
- Oh, my God.
You're dating her.
- We're just friends, sir.
- O, O, O,
you're dating her.
- Here we are, now, Owen,
pie and mash.
- Well, I'll let you get back
to Mrs. Lovett.
- Who's that little tyke?
Is that the little prince?
- Yes, it is.
- Don't.
Don't put me on with--
Hi!
How are you, dear?
- 'Ello, sweetheart!
- Oh, look at those teeth.
How fun.
- Bye, lovey.
- Don't ever do that again.
All right, go eat.
Your cat pie is getting cold.
- Can I get you
anything else, Owen?
- No, thank you, Vera.
- Right, then, love.
Give us a call sometime, eh?
♪
- Evening, Owen.
- Evening, Gladys!
- Quick, turn on HGTV.
- Hi, I'm Meghan Markle.
- And I'm Harry
Harry.
- And we're "Royally Screwed."
- Each week, we take a house
from drab
- To fab.
The Anderson family
had $75,000
to renovate their
three-bedroom ranch house.
- It was our live savings.
- Anderson family,
do you remember
what your house
used to look like?
Would you like to see
what it looks like now?
yeah!
- Then come on in, guys.
- Well?
- Itit looks
exactly the same.
- Look closely.
- I don't see any difference
at all.
- Keep looking.
- I'm worried.
- Shh.
- Can I get a clue?
- The kitchen.
- II don't see it.
- The backsplash?
- Oh, right.
That's new.
- Huh? Huh?
Do you love it?
Real solid gold inlay.
It makes the whole room pop.
- You spent $75,000
on backsplash?
- No.
We spent $100,000!
- I told you we should've gone
with the subway tile.
- Well, they've been
royally screwed, all right.
- Owen, did you
just make a joke?
- I did, sir.
- I fucking love that.
Ugh, what worse can they do
after this, sell insurance?
Ooh, there's a "House Hunters"
on now.
I'm gonna watch that.
♪
♪
- Hello, sir.
- Hey.
I can't sleep.
- Would you like me
to tell you a story, sir?
- No, I'm not a baby.
What story?
- Well
once upon a time,
there was a very simple man
who lived in a tiny house
with a tiny garden,
and he fell in love
with a very simple woman.
They took joy in
a walk, a cup of tea, a smile.
And those simple things
made them feel
like they were not
so simple at all--
quite the opposite, in fact.
It made them feel
like the most special people
in the world.
And one day, they got married,
and this very simple man
suddenly became a king
because he had found his queen.
And the tiny house
was their palace
and the tiny garden
their kingdom.
And they lived happily
for years and years
until the queen got very sick
and then
In a breath, was gone.
And the man went
from being a king
back to being
very simple once again.
But sometimes
late at night
when it's very quiet,
she comes to him,
and just for a moment
He is a king.
Good night, George.
♪
♪
♪
- Excuse me, you there, Mary.
- Yes, Your Majesty.
- Can you donate this
to a soup kitchen
and bring me something
I can fucking eat?
- Mummy, would you like
my eggs?
They're very yummy.
- Yeah, I want to eat
off your plate
like we live
in a fucking trailer park.
Do you ever listen to yourself?
- No, Mummy, I don't.
And it was actually
Camilla's idea
I offer you the eggs.
Please forgive me, darling.
I hate myself.
- Ma'am,
it's the prime minister.
- Hello?
Well, did you fuck her?
All right,
I'll take care of it.
You don't talk to anyone
until you get my call,
understand?
Thank you, Mary.
- Grandpa,
are you eating the paper?
- That's new.
- Well, I have an appointment.
Please excuse me.
Would you tell the children
I'll be home later?
- I'm sitting
right next to you.
- Where are you going?
- Out.
Don't worry, I'll be back
in time to watch the servants
put the children to bed
from my phone.
- That's a good mother,
hands-on.
- I was breastfed by a servant.
- Yes, but she watched.
- Is there anything you need
before I leave for my day off,
Your Royal Highness?
- Your day off?
Didn't you just have a day off?
When do you actually work?
- It's been
about a month, sir.
- Must be nice
to have your life.
All right, well,
go if you're going.
- If you need anything at all,
sir, don't hesitate--
- Owen, Owen, just leave,
for God's sake.
I think I'll be fine
without whatever it is
you think you do.
- Of course, sir.
- Bye-eee.
- Okay, now he's eating
the centerpiece.
- It's fine.
- Are you okay?
- Why haven't you
touched me lately?
- Can we not
talk about this now?
- Well, I'm off.
I'll see everyone tomorrow.
- Big plans, then, Owen?
- Oh, nothing much.
Well, ta-ta.
- Bye, Owen!
Have fun!
I'd go home and slit my throat
if I had to look after
that kid all day.
Don't.
- Nnow, then,
can I get anyone a nice cuppa?
Teddy?
- Yeah, thanks, Kev.
Fuckin' love Kev.
- Morning, Owen.
- Morning, Clive.
- Have a good day, Owen.
- You too, Clive.
♪
- Hello?
- Hey, is this a bad time?
- Of course not,
Your Royal Highness.
- So I found the socks.
I sent you back
a smiley emoji, by the way.
- Yes, I saw that.
- Oh, well,
you didn't respond.
- Morning, Owen!
- Morning, Dan!
I sent you
a thumbs-up on it, sir.
- Oh, okay,
I must have missed that.
Anyway,
I was wondering which--
- Hello, Owen.
- Hello, Faye!
- I was wondering
which remote I use
to go from Apple TV
back to cable.
- The small silver one, sir.
- Yeah, I tried that one.
- Fresh blackberries today,
Owen?
- I'll come by later for some,
Samuel.
- You're doing
that walk through town
like you're fucking Belle
in "Beauty and the Beast."
Jesus Christ,
do you know how annoying it is
for me on my end?
- I apologize, sir.
- Oh, okay, wait.
The silver one is working now.
- Splendid, sir.
- It wasn't before, though.
All right, well,
I'm gonna watch "Below Deck."
- Good morning, O--
- He's on the fucking phone!
Okay, well,
that's it on my end.
Enjoy your day off.
- If you need anything else--
- No, no, I'm good.
I'll talk to you later.
Ciao.
♪
- Hello?
- Hey. What are you doing?
- Just making
a cup of tea, sir.
- Cool. I'm having tea too.
So has it started raining
there yet?
- Not yet, no, sir.
- That's good. That's good.
Maybe it won't rain there,
day off and all that.
Ooh, are you in the kitchen?
Show me your kitchen.
- It's nothing much
to speak of,
Your Royal Highness.
- It's cute, O.
All right, well, I'll let you
get back to your tea.
- Goodbye, sir.
- Yup. See you tomorrow.
- Hello?
- Quick question.
How long is an avocado
good for?
- They're good
for several days, sir.
- So if it's a little brown,
it's still okay?
- Yes, that should be fine,
sir.
- Yeah, thought so.
Just checking.
Is that your garden?
- Yes.
It's very, very small.
- It's fucking adorable
is what it is.
Everything is so tiny
and cute.
It's like you live
in a dollhouse, O.
- It suits my needs, sir.
- Anyway, I gotta go,
but thanks for calling.
♪
- I don't have long.
I told William
I was serving porridge
to battered women.
- Then let's get to it.
So you're positive
you want to leave your husband?
- Yes! I've already found
a place to live.
And I'm applying for a job
at goop.
- Ooh, goop.
Well, I'll start working
on the papers, then.
- Nobody must know.
I fear for my life.
- Really?
- Well, not really,
but, you know, it's bad there.
- Can I ask,
what's the queen like?
Is she nice?
- She's a fucking nightmare.
I'll be in touch.
- Hello, sir.
- Hey.
I'm bored.
Anything going on over there?
- No, no, nothing at all.
- Hello, Owen.
Good to see ya.
- Hello, Toby.
- Well, if it isn't Owen.
- Hello, Vera.
- Ugh, now you're at Cheers.
- Where you been hidin', Owen?
You haven't called.
- Been meaning to, Vera.
Work.
Rock climbing.
- Rock climbing?
- Right.
Sure.
Usual?
- Please.
- Oh, my God.
You're dating her.
- We're just friends, sir.
- O, O, O,
you're dating her.
- Here we are, now, Owen,
pie and mash.
- Well, I'll let you get back
to Mrs. Lovett.
- Who's that little tyke?
Is that the little prince?
- Yes, it is.
- Don't.
Don't put me on with--
Hi!
How are you, dear?
- 'Ello, sweetheart!
- Oh, look at those teeth.
How fun.
- Bye, lovey.
- Don't ever do that again.
All right, go eat.
Your cat pie is getting cold.
- Can I get you
anything else, Owen?
- No, thank you, Vera.
- Right, then, love.
Give us a call sometime, eh?
♪
- Evening, Owen.
- Evening, Gladys!
- Quick, turn on HGTV.
- Hi, I'm Meghan Markle.
- And I'm Harry
Harry.
- And we're "Royally Screwed."
- Each week, we take a house
from drab
- To fab.
The Anderson family
had $75,000
to renovate their
three-bedroom ranch house.
- It was our live savings.
- Anderson family,
do you remember
what your house
used to look like?
Would you like to see
what it looks like now?
yeah!
- Then come on in, guys.
- Well?
- Itit looks
exactly the same.
- Look closely.
- I don't see any difference
at all.
- Keep looking.
- I'm worried.
- Shh.
- Can I get a clue?
- The kitchen.
- II don't see it.
- The backsplash?
- Oh, right.
That's new.
- Huh? Huh?
Do you love it?
Real solid gold inlay.
It makes the whole room pop.
- You spent $75,000
on backsplash?
- No.
We spent $100,000!
- I told you we should've gone
with the subway tile.
- Well, they've been
royally screwed, all right.
- Owen, did you
just make a joke?
- I did, sir.
- I fucking love that.
Ugh, what worse can they do
after this, sell insurance?
Ooh, there's a "House Hunters"
on now.
I'm gonna watch that.
♪
♪
- Hello, sir.
- Hey.
I can't sleep.
- Would you like me
to tell you a story, sir?
- No, I'm not a baby.
What story?
- Well
once upon a time,
there was a very simple man
who lived in a tiny house
with a tiny garden,
and he fell in love
with a very simple woman.
They took joy in
a walk, a cup of tea, a smile.
And those simple things
made them feel
like they were not
so simple at all--
quite the opposite, in fact.
It made them feel
like the most special people
in the world.
And one day, they got married,
and this very simple man
suddenly became a king
because he had found his queen.
And the tiny house
was their palace
and the tiny garden
their kingdom.
And they lived happily
for years and years
until the queen got very sick
and then
In a breath, was gone.
And the man went
from being a king
back to being
very simple once again.
But sometimes
late at night
when it's very quiet,
she comes to him,
and just for a moment
He is a king.
Good night, George.
♪