Unsupervised (2012) s01e08 Episode Script
My Brother Brian
1 Give it to me! No! - Give it to me! - I'm gonna tell Mom! Yo, Joel! Come on! We're late for school! Stop bein' a dick and give me my dress-up shirt, Brian.
You're muffing it up! I got a Martin Luther King assembly at school.
What, are you black now? No, I'm frickin' respectful, something you don't know nothing about! What's going on, dude? My frickin' brother's back.
I'm goin' to get smokes.
You two can be alone and rub your dicks together.
You're gonna get smokes again? You took six hours last time.
You're not taking my bike! It's my bike.
You're 40 years old! You should have a car and a family and a job and not be moving back home and stealing your brother's bike.
It's my frickin' bike! Yeah, the bike's mine.
Okay? And the shirt's mine.
Okay? And the underwear is mine.
Okay? Everything in this house is mine.
You don't got nothin'.
I'm gon' kick your frickin' ass! Frickin' try it! Bust his ass, Joel! - Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! - This is what you wanted! - You frickin' kicked my cut! - No cut kicks, Brian! Get him! No! No doubles! No doubles! Ow! Ow! Unsupervised 1x08 My Brother Brian Holla at your boy.
Damn, dude.
Master, don't take my corn from me Ho, Master, ho Master, gimme some food for my belly, please Ho, Master, ho Man, this is some bullshit.
It's a frickin' spiritual celebration of Martin Luther King.
It's a mockery.
They couldn't get no black people to sing? - Well, did you sign up? - I ain't doin' that shit.
Y'all smell like cigarettes.
It's my goddamn brother Brian.
He smokes like a maniac.
He friggin' smokes in Joel's bed while he's sleeping.
I can't get no rest.
Between the smoking and the kick fights, it's all the time, around the clock.
He was a frickin' district selection.
And now I'm at an important assembly and I can't even pay attention 'cause I'm steamin' about him.
When's he leaving? Probably never.
He lost his job grouting, he's on disability, and he's gonna be sleepin' in my bed, blowin' smoke in my face for the rest of my frickin' life.
- Thank you, guys! - Thank you, Clint and Lisa.
Stirring stuff.
I'm sure Martin King's spirit is smiling down upon us right now.
And he knows that the bomb threat that canceled the original assembly was not racially motivated.
Maynord High School does not discriminate.
All right, please welcome sophomore Audrey Coates, with a speech about Martin King.
Honky.
Gook.
Kike.
- Huh? - Chocolate monster! What the shit? Words are weapons.
And I'm sure I'll be called a lot of things after what I reveal to you today.
My name is Audrey Coates, and I am a lesbian.
Oh, Christ.
I didn't ask to be this way.
It just happened.
One day I noticed a girl in my class and I felt ngle inside of me.
It was electric.
"You're gay? What do you mean, honey?" "No daughter of mine's gonna be queer.
" I just lost my appeti " "Daddy! Wait! I'm the same girl you cradled in your arms and called his little butterfly.
" Then high school.
I was blossoming into a woman, and I was terrified.
Faces are like snowflakes and no two are the same.
And like Dr.
King, I too have a dream.
No, she didn't.
She No.
"I have a dream.
" She didn't jsaust say that, rig? A dream for all of us to stop being snowflakes and to start being a snowball of brotherhood.
I-I'm sorry, y'all.
I can't Bitch, get off the stage! What the hell's wrong with you? Look at me! I'm a lesbian! Yeah! Who wants to see my vagina? Aah! There's peppers in my face! This school does not tolerate discrimination.
What the hell was that? It was moving and beautiful.
She showed great strength and courage.
It was obnoxious.
What, do you hate gays? No, I hate Audrey.
She's on my cross-country team.
She gives these weird inspirational speeches before every meet.
And she's not even fast.
She just wants attention.
Well, I thought it was inspiring.
It's tolerance in its simplest form.
- We could all stand to be more tolerant.
- You guys are too tolerant.
Someone's gonna take advantage of you.
If anybody has any questions, I'm here to provide answers.
Yuck! Other way.
What are you stewing about? It's nothing.
Forget it.
Joel, you open up right now.
That's an order.
I'm frickin' pissed! All right? At who? Brian? No, man.
At myself.
I've been intolerant against my own brother.
It's true.
You have.
Hey, you were kicking him in the neck when I had him in a figure four.
- He's not my brother.
- Oh, is that a factual statement? Me and you are blood brothers and his blood is in my blood, so he's your brother too.
You're right.
Frick.
Man, if Martin Luther King were here right now, he'd spit in our face.
And he'd have every right to.
We gotta be more tolerant of Brian.
If you can't be tolerant of your own brother, then who can you be tolerant of? Nobody.
Not a goddamn one.
What do you mean, I almost started a riot? With your catcall to our student speaker.
I know the black culture doesn't tolerate gays.
I dated a mulatto once.
I'm aware of the "down-low.
" I'm not homophobic.
I got a cousin who's gay.
Delecta.
He's good people too.
We used to kick it at the roller rink.
Dude was pullin' 350 pounds.
But he was nasty with that shuffle skate.
Graceful, like a baby deer in a field, just bouncing.
Then why did you heckle the gay girl? I didn't heckle her for being a gay.
I heckled her for being obnoxious.
Can't I just hate someone for being themselves? There was a time when you could.
You could hate someone for the color of their skin, or the god they worshipped, or simply for the way they looked.
That was freedom, Mr.
Jenkins.
No, that was racism.
I was just following your lead.
You're not wearing a wire, are you? Am I free to go? Unfortunately, you have to attend a mandatory student discrimination group.
- What? - It's part of the anti-bullying initiative.
The school board's got me walking on eggshells.
That's why I commissioned the art class to paint the peace wall.
Everyone is so sensitive these days.
It's the gays' fault.
They're litigious people.
Say what you will about the blacks.
They keep it out of the courts.
You shouldn't be saying this stuff to me.
Maybe you should go to the tolerance workshop.
Ah.
You are wearing a wire, aren't you? All right, I'm outta h Oh, man! Really? I wasn't going to use it.
aslt was just a reflex.
Rock .]
Yo, Brian.
Oh, man.
You're freakin' soaking wet, man.
Get out of the bed.
I just took a shower.
I'm air drying.
So, you wanna kick around a soccer ball with me? Why would I wanna do that? 'Cause we don't know nothin' about each other.
- Get to know me.
I'm interesting.
- I know enough.
Oh, yeah? What's my favorite snake? Frickin' rattler.
Okay? Well, yeah.
Lucky guess.
That's everyone's favorite snake.
My favorite snake is a copperhead.
Come on, man.
You can put on your varsity jacket.
Where'd you get that? I dug it out of the attic.
It was buried under Dad's crab gear.
Gimme that.
Stop freakin' hiding my stuff from me, Mom! Respect my privacy, dang it! Found a black widow spider earlier.
Bull crap.
Where is it? Flushed it down the toilet.
Probably halfway to the ocean right now.
You killed it? What the hell? Who the hell catches a black widow and kills it? It's a rare specimen.
You put it in a jar, or on display, or you send it to an institute.
Shit.
Where are my smokes? I'm gonna shove your smokes up your ass! You and what army? That's it! Stop it! I' Dude, hey! You chill out.
You're being intolerant as hell.
He He presses my dang buttons, man! If you were Martin Luther King, what would you say to yourself right now? I'd say to love my brother regardless of race, color or creed.
And? And that we're all brothers under the same rainbow of the human world.
Hey, Brian.
Joel's got something to say to you.
Where the frick Aw, man.
Where'd he go? That's my bike alarm! He stole my bike again! Come back here, you ass-lick! Frig off! I'm getting smokes! You already got smokes! Come on, dude, jump on! We'll follow him.
I frickin' hate pegs.
There's my bike.
He just threw it on the curb.
Man, he's got no respect for personal property.
What the hell's he doing? He's just hanging out by the trash.
He freakin' lied to us.
Probably lied about the black widow too.
Definitely.
We never found a black widow and we look all the time.
What's up, man? How you doin'? Not so bad.
What the frick's this? I thought Brian didn't have any friends.
He's my own brother, and I don't know nothing about him.
All I know is he lies and he smokes, and that's it.
I'm frickin' going in.
What the Come on, Keith.
Give me your power.
I want your power! - Well, that's interesting.
- Come on! I'm in mental shock right now.
I can't believe my brother's gay.
Yeah.
That was intense.
No wonder he's always lying to me and running off.
He's ashamed.
Here I am, trying to be tolerant of him.
He can't even tolerate himself.
He's living a secret life.
He shouldn't have to hide anymore.
He should be banging dudes at home, in a loving environment, supported by family and friends.
Gays need a strong support system.
And it's on me to be there for my brother.
No.
It's on us.
You'll probably wanna get separate beds though.
Yeah, I don't wanna be in bed when he's banging studs.
That's not homophobia.
That's just sanitation.
- Hey, Meegs.
- Hi, Audrey.
Did you, uh, see my speech? Yeah.
The whole school saw your speech.
You know, in a way it was a love letter.
To who? Yourself.
No.
To you.
Get off me! What the hell? You're the one I was talking about.
You're the one who gave me the tingle.
Well, I'm not gay! You're not? But you always hang back and run with me.
Because I'm slow.
My hip pops.
See? But you always talk about how you hate boys and how it'd just be easier to be celibate.
It'd be easier, but that doesn't mean I want to have sex with men.
I would have sex with JoJo Vanetti in a heartbeat.
- Oh.
- I thought I was alone.
I I come down to the gym bathroom for privacy.
I wear children's shoes so I won't be identified.
- Wh-What's going on here? - Nothing.
She tried to kiss me, so I pushed her off me.
You pushed the gay girl? This is a joke.
I shouldn't even be here.
Principal Stark called it a hate crime.
That bitch is crazy.
And how you gonna call this a discrimination workshop? He's doing fantasy football.
I have a a tolerance question.
Do lesbians put stuff up in their butts? Do your workbook, Russ.
Yo! Discrimination alert! We've got the biggest discriminatory problem you ever heard.
My brother's gay as hell.
So? So? He's bangin' dudes behind Dumpsters 'cause he's ashamed of who he is.
That's trifling.
Being gay ain't nothing to be ashamed about.
My cousin Delecta's gay and proud of it.
The frickin' master roller-skater? Yeah, with the spins and shit.
He got this one move called the whirlybird.
Oh! We should hook Brian up with him! He'll be a positive gay influence! You wanna hook my cousin up with somebody that's bangin' people behind Dumpsters? - Man, that's my family.
- Let's go ask Audrey for advice.
She's gay, and she ain't ashamed about it at all.
Um, she's also crazy.
She kissed me out of nowhere in the locker room.
Ho-ho! That's erotic! Congratulations! Oh, shit! That's awesome! - Was that your first kiss? - No! Oh, crap.
It was.
I didn't even think about that.
That sucks! Whoa.
She done took your memories, girl.
My first kiss was supposed to be special, at a spring cotillion or with a dangerous older boy in the back of his car.
My first kiss was with a gorilla at a petting zoo.
And he whispered somethin' in my ear.
He said, "We can talk to people.
" Megan, Audrey was just looking for love, the same wsaay Brian is.
There's gays all over reaching out for each other.
Yeah.
We just gotta connect them.
We gotta find Brian some like-minded gays to hang out with.
He's friggin' Dumpster-diving right now.
He's looking for love in a trash bin! It's bullshit, yo! Where the hell's a gay man find a supportive gay community in the modern age? I know exactly where.
Damn, dog, there's frickin' studs everywhere.
It's a meat market.
It's the Internet.
It connects everyone in the freakin' world.
Oh, okay, perfect.
Here we go.
"Men seeking men.
" Click on it, son.
"Looking for hot guy!!!" Well, he used three exclamation marks.
Seems friendly.
"Must be discreet.
" We don't want discreet.
They should be proud and out in the open.
Oh, all right.
Here's another.
"Cute guy.
S.
T.
D.
free and clean.
"No games.
" No games.
Straight shooter.
I want to know more.
Yeah.
Seems promising.
Oh! Oh! It's just a picture of a dick! That dick's gnarled as hell.
Click back, man! Click back! Okay, what's this one? "Door's open.
Walk in and find me on my knees, ass up.
" Oh! Come on! It's another picture of a dong! Why would you click on that? There was obviously gonna be a dick on the other side.
I was intrigued.
Hey, boys.
You enjoying the technology of the Internet? Yo, Martin.
You still work here? Claro, que sÃ.
I gotta get that cheddar, man.
And Mr.
Lewelyn, he's a good guy.
But the stuff these people look at on the Internets, with the webcams and the chat rooms and the tubes no, ay.
Well, Martin, the Internet is a place of perversion.
Gay or straight, people are free to cultivate their fetishes without shame.
My café provides a portal to depravity and I shall pay for my transgressions.
I don't know, man.
Maybe the Internet's too tolerant.
It's chock-full of smut.
Which has its time and its place.
But now is not that time.
You want your brother to live out loud? Take him to the big city.
In the big city, there's no judgments.
This town is too ÿCómo se dice? Close-minded.
Hey, Mexico.
Got a mess for you in the bathroom.
Hey, I no Mexican, guy! I'm from Panama! - Yeah, same thing.
- Back to work.
Ho! That's it! We'll put Brian on a bus to a major metropolis of his choosing.
That's gonna be pretty expensive.
So I'll sell my bike and ride on pegs You frickin' hate pegs! He's my brother, Gary! I'd sell the hair off my damn head if I could.
It wouldn't have to be for wigs either.
They could be using it for ill.
You are so tolerant right now, it's frickin' inspiring.
Yo, there he is! Yo, Brian! What the hell you doing here? I'm your frickin' brother.
And I want you to know I accept you.
Come here.
Whoa! You wanna step to me? No! Aah! Aah! This is my step! - I'm tryin' to be real with you.
-Calm down! He's delivering message of tolerance! Brian, I know you're a homosexual man.
What? I ain't frickin' gay.
Come on! Yeah, you are.
We saw you gettin' humped by a dude behind a Dumpster.
You saw that? Aw, frick! Frick! You don't let anyone see that, Brian! I'll frickin' kick-fight you! Yo, he's about to fight himself! It's okay, man.
We're here to give you support and tolerance until our dyin' days.
I ain't frickin' gay, you idiots! I'm addicted to meth! What? I suck dick for money.
Okay? You get banged behind a Dumpster so you can buy meth? I'll let 'em do whatever they want to me as long as they got sh.
Suck, money, meth.
Suck, money, meth.
That's what I do.
I'll suck anyone here! I'm open for business! At least he's not ashamed to be who he is.
Who he is is terrible.
Yo! Yo.
Lookin' for a party? Yo.
All right.
Eew.
I can't believe my brother's a meth-head hustler.
Just remember drug addiction's a sickness.
So we're gonna have to be more tolerant now than ever.
And deep down inside he's a good man.
It goes up in increments of five.
Lower the hole, the higher the price.
No ears.
No nose.
Creases and crooks are negotiable.
If you can get an angle on it, it's yours to buy.
He's not for sale! Shit! Is that a cop? Why do I always do this? Damn it! No, no, relax.
Get outta he, Joel.
You're ruining my sale.
No! I'm your frickin' brother and I can tolerate a lot of things.
But I can't tolerate you selling your body for crank.
So you got two choices.
You can come home right now and get help from your two brothers Two brothers? Who's the other? Me.
Who the hell do you think? Or you can stay out here and turn tricks and I'll take my bike back, pedal off into the sunset, and you'll never see me again.
Ain't possible.
I sold your bike for meth.
You what? Son of a bitch! You're the worst brother ever! You know he was gonna ride on pegs the rest of his life so you could live in a major metropolis? You can't even steer when you're on pegs.
Well, guess what.
You just lost your brother, both of 'em.
Yo, I gotta go pick up my kid from tee ball.
You gonna suck me off or what? Yeah.
Let's go.
He had it all, and he flushed it down the sewer.
He could've played in the World Cup and delivered America soccer glory.
He would've popularized the sport.
Instead he chose a life of prostitution and drugs.
- He looked like Bill Gates.
- He got the looks in the family.
Who did this? Rose, don't just stand there.
Get the paint.
And have the lawyers ready.
Always have the lawyers ready.
This is going to be a shit-storm from hell.
You've gotta get it together, girl.
Excuse me? Just let it go.
You can't stop it.
It's just, there's no respect.
We in high school.
What do you expect? We cruel as hell.
We don't celebrate differences, we exploit them.
You find a weakness, and you attack.
It's a shark tank.
Me, I'm just trying to get to the beach and graduate.
You're a true gentleman, Mr.
Jenkins.
Shoot, I ain't no angel.
You say something about my size, I'm-a put it right back on you.
As you should.
Did you see this? I know.
You can't just be doggin' Shirley Temple like that.
She's a national treasure.
What? I don't care about that.
I'm talking about Audrey.
No.
She's got a girlfriend now.
Audrey found gay love? That's awesome.
No, it's not.
It's ridiculous.
She said she was obsessed with me, and then the next day she's in a relationship? I thought you weren't gay.
I'm not, but it sort of cheapens the kiss.
It was bad enough.
Give me something.
It's not fair.
Yo, that's how it is, y'all.
Get used to it.
Could be worse.
Could be him.
Look at him! He's different than us! He's a Chinese computer! Everyone laugh! Shark tank, y'll Blood in the water.
Hey, idiot.
I said I never wanted to see you again.
I divorced you as a brother.
All right, fine.
You might want to take this first.
That ain't my bike.
That's a frickin' double speed.
What did you do, steal it? No, man, I bought it.
Oh, yeah? With what? You don't got no money.
Sold my varsity jacket.
You sold your varsity jacket to buy him a bike? Yeah.
Wasn't worth much though.
I had to do a wagon wheel to cover the rest.
What the hell's a wagon wheel? Three guys.
I'm the spokes.
They use my body as a chassis.
Damn.
That's gruesome.
You ain't lyin'? You really did that for me? Yo! A little help? Huh? He's doin' it! He's jugglin'! Oh! That's a frickin' scissor kick! He frickin' scissored it! You still got it! All-frickin'-district.
Hey, not cool, man! Eh, screw off, dickless! Nice kick.
So this is your gay brother? He ain't gay.
But he is my brother.
And he's the coolest guy I ever met.
Yo, that kick move was flyin', man! You like a cracked out David Beckham! David Beckham? I'll take that for a second kiss.
It was delicious! Oh, God! Your mouth tastes terrible.
What is that? It's probably crank and dong.
He's a meth-head hustler.
What? Oh, God.
I've got to go to the nurse So what now? I'm gonna get some help.
Really? You're going to rehab? Rehab? What am I, a frikin' millionaire? Come on, Joel, use your head.
Where are you going, then? There's been a bomb threat.
Everyone, clear out! Oh, shit! Relax There ain't no bomb.
Just a meth-head-suck who's trying to straighten himself out.
Hey! Dick-head! Come and get me! Yo, I love you, big brother! At least, he's getting some help.
Yeah It all worked out in the end.
Stay off-drugs, little brother! Sir, get in the car! Suck my ass, bitch! Jesus, stop resisting, Brian! Just frikin' go in the car! Eh, he's probably better off in jail.
You're muffing it up! I got a Martin Luther King assembly at school.
What, are you black now? No, I'm frickin' respectful, something you don't know nothing about! What's going on, dude? My frickin' brother's back.
I'm goin' to get smokes.
You two can be alone and rub your dicks together.
You're gonna get smokes again? You took six hours last time.
You're not taking my bike! It's my bike.
You're 40 years old! You should have a car and a family and a job and not be moving back home and stealing your brother's bike.
It's my frickin' bike! Yeah, the bike's mine.
Okay? And the shirt's mine.
Okay? And the underwear is mine.
Okay? Everything in this house is mine.
You don't got nothin'.
I'm gon' kick your frickin' ass! Frickin' try it! Bust his ass, Joel! - Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! - This is what you wanted! - You frickin' kicked my cut! - No cut kicks, Brian! Get him! No! No doubles! No doubles! Ow! Ow! Unsupervised 1x08 My Brother Brian Holla at your boy.
Damn, dude.
Master, don't take my corn from me Ho, Master, ho Master, gimme some food for my belly, please Ho, Master, ho Man, this is some bullshit.
It's a frickin' spiritual celebration of Martin Luther King.
It's a mockery.
They couldn't get no black people to sing? - Well, did you sign up? - I ain't doin' that shit.
Y'all smell like cigarettes.
It's my goddamn brother Brian.
He smokes like a maniac.
He friggin' smokes in Joel's bed while he's sleeping.
I can't get no rest.
Between the smoking and the kick fights, it's all the time, around the clock.
He was a frickin' district selection.
And now I'm at an important assembly and I can't even pay attention 'cause I'm steamin' about him.
When's he leaving? Probably never.
He lost his job grouting, he's on disability, and he's gonna be sleepin' in my bed, blowin' smoke in my face for the rest of my frickin' life.
- Thank you, guys! - Thank you, Clint and Lisa.
Stirring stuff.
I'm sure Martin King's spirit is smiling down upon us right now.
And he knows that the bomb threat that canceled the original assembly was not racially motivated.
Maynord High School does not discriminate.
All right, please welcome sophomore Audrey Coates, with a speech about Martin King.
Honky.
Gook.
Kike.
- Huh? - Chocolate monster! What the shit? Words are weapons.
And I'm sure I'll be called a lot of things after what I reveal to you today.
My name is Audrey Coates, and I am a lesbian.
Oh, Christ.
I didn't ask to be this way.
It just happened.
One day I noticed a girl in my class and I felt ngle inside of me.
It was electric.
"You're gay? What do you mean, honey?" "No daughter of mine's gonna be queer.
" I just lost my appeti " "Daddy! Wait! I'm the same girl you cradled in your arms and called his little butterfly.
" Then high school.
I was blossoming into a woman, and I was terrified.
Faces are like snowflakes and no two are the same.
And like Dr.
King, I too have a dream.
No, she didn't.
She No.
"I have a dream.
" She didn't jsaust say that, rig? A dream for all of us to stop being snowflakes and to start being a snowball of brotherhood.
I-I'm sorry, y'all.
I can't Bitch, get off the stage! What the hell's wrong with you? Look at me! I'm a lesbian! Yeah! Who wants to see my vagina? Aah! There's peppers in my face! This school does not tolerate discrimination.
What the hell was that? It was moving and beautiful.
She showed great strength and courage.
It was obnoxious.
What, do you hate gays? No, I hate Audrey.
She's on my cross-country team.
She gives these weird inspirational speeches before every meet.
And she's not even fast.
She just wants attention.
Well, I thought it was inspiring.
It's tolerance in its simplest form.
- We could all stand to be more tolerant.
- You guys are too tolerant.
Someone's gonna take advantage of you.
If anybody has any questions, I'm here to provide answers.
Yuck! Other way.
What are you stewing about? It's nothing.
Forget it.
Joel, you open up right now.
That's an order.
I'm frickin' pissed! All right? At who? Brian? No, man.
At myself.
I've been intolerant against my own brother.
It's true.
You have.
Hey, you were kicking him in the neck when I had him in a figure four.
- He's not my brother.
- Oh, is that a factual statement? Me and you are blood brothers and his blood is in my blood, so he's your brother too.
You're right.
Frick.
Man, if Martin Luther King were here right now, he'd spit in our face.
And he'd have every right to.
We gotta be more tolerant of Brian.
If you can't be tolerant of your own brother, then who can you be tolerant of? Nobody.
Not a goddamn one.
What do you mean, I almost started a riot? With your catcall to our student speaker.
I know the black culture doesn't tolerate gays.
I dated a mulatto once.
I'm aware of the "down-low.
" I'm not homophobic.
I got a cousin who's gay.
Delecta.
He's good people too.
We used to kick it at the roller rink.
Dude was pullin' 350 pounds.
But he was nasty with that shuffle skate.
Graceful, like a baby deer in a field, just bouncing.
Then why did you heckle the gay girl? I didn't heckle her for being a gay.
I heckled her for being obnoxious.
Can't I just hate someone for being themselves? There was a time when you could.
You could hate someone for the color of their skin, or the god they worshipped, or simply for the way they looked.
That was freedom, Mr.
Jenkins.
No, that was racism.
I was just following your lead.
You're not wearing a wire, are you? Am I free to go? Unfortunately, you have to attend a mandatory student discrimination group.
- What? - It's part of the anti-bullying initiative.
The school board's got me walking on eggshells.
That's why I commissioned the art class to paint the peace wall.
Everyone is so sensitive these days.
It's the gays' fault.
They're litigious people.
Say what you will about the blacks.
They keep it out of the courts.
You shouldn't be saying this stuff to me.
Maybe you should go to the tolerance workshop.
Ah.
You are wearing a wire, aren't you? All right, I'm outta h Oh, man! Really? I wasn't going to use it.
aslt was just a reflex.
Rock .]
Yo, Brian.
Oh, man.
You're freakin' soaking wet, man.
Get out of the bed.
I just took a shower.
I'm air drying.
So, you wanna kick around a soccer ball with me? Why would I wanna do that? 'Cause we don't know nothin' about each other.
- Get to know me.
I'm interesting.
- I know enough.
Oh, yeah? What's my favorite snake? Frickin' rattler.
Okay? Well, yeah.
Lucky guess.
That's everyone's favorite snake.
My favorite snake is a copperhead.
Come on, man.
You can put on your varsity jacket.
Where'd you get that? I dug it out of the attic.
It was buried under Dad's crab gear.
Gimme that.
Stop freakin' hiding my stuff from me, Mom! Respect my privacy, dang it! Found a black widow spider earlier.
Bull crap.
Where is it? Flushed it down the toilet.
Probably halfway to the ocean right now.
You killed it? What the hell? Who the hell catches a black widow and kills it? It's a rare specimen.
You put it in a jar, or on display, or you send it to an institute.
Shit.
Where are my smokes? I'm gonna shove your smokes up your ass! You and what army? That's it! Stop it! I' Dude, hey! You chill out.
You're being intolerant as hell.
He He presses my dang buttons, man! If you were Martin Luther King, what would you say to yourself right now? I'd say to love my brother regardless of race, color or creed.
And? And that we're all brothers under the same rainbow of the human world.
Hey, Brian.
Joel's got something to say to you.
Where the frick Aw, man.
Where'd he go? That's my bike alarm! He stole my bike again! Come back here, you ass-lick! Frig off! I'm getting smokes! You already got smokes! Come on, dude, jump on! We'll follow him.
I frickin' hate pegs.
There's my bike.
He just threw it on the curb.
Man, he's got no respect for personal property.
What the hell's he doing? He's just hanging out by the trash.
He freakin' lied to us.
Probably lied about the black widow too.
Definitely.
We never found a black widow and we look all the time.
What's up, man? How you doin'? Not so bad.
What the frick's this? I thought Brian didn't have any friends.
He's my own brother, and I don't know nothing about him.
All I know is he lies and he smokes, and that's it.
I'm frickin' going in.
What the Come on, Keith.
Give me your power.
I want your power! - Well, that's interesting.
- Come on! I'm in mental shock right now.
I can't believe my brother's gay.
Yeah.
That was intense.
No wonder he's always lying to me and running off.
He's ashamed.
Here I am, trying to be tolerant of him.
He can't even tolerate himself.
He's living a secret life.
He shouldn't have to hide anymore.
He should be banging dudes at home, in a loving environment, supported by family and friends.
Gays need a strong support system.
And it's on me to be there for my brother.
No.
It's on us.
You'll probably wanna get separate beds though.
Yeah, I don't wanna be in bed when he's banging studs.
That's not homophobia.
That's just sanitation.
- Hey, Meegs.
- Hi, Audrey.
Did you, uh, see my speech? Yeah.
The whole school saw your speech.
You know, in a way it was a love letter.
To who? Yourself.
No.
To you.
Get off me! What the hell? You're the one I was talking about.
You're the one who gave me the tingle.
Well, I'm not gay! You're not? But you always hang back and run with me.
Because I'm slow.
My hip pops.
See? But you always talk about how you hate boys and how it'd just be easier to be celibate.
It'd be easier, but that doesn't mean I want to have sex with men.
I would have sex with JoJo Vanetti in a heartbeat.
- Oh.
- I thought I was alone.
I I come down to the gym bathroom for privacy.
I wear children's shoes so I won't be identified.
- Wh-What's going on here? - Nothing.
She tried to kiss me, so I pushed her off me.
You pushed the gay girl? This is a joke.
I shouldn't even be here.
Principal Stark called it a hate crime.
That bitch is crazy.
And how you gonna call this a discrimination workshop? He's doing fantasy football.
I have a a tolerance question.
Do lesbians put stuff up in their butts? Do your workbook, Russ.
Yo! Discrimination alert! We've got the biggest discriminatory problem you ever heard.
My brother's gay as hell.
So? So? He's bangin' dudes behind Dumpsters 'cause he's ashamed of who he is.
That's trifling.
Being gay ain't nothing to be ashamed about.
My cousin Delecta's gay and proud of it.
The frickin' master roller-skater? Yeah, with the spins and shit.
He got this one move called the whirlybird.
Oh! We should hook Brian up with him! He'll be a positive gay influence! You wanna hook my cousin up with somebody that's bangin' people behind Dumpsters? - Man, that's my family.
- Let's go ask Audrey for advice.
She's gay, and she ain't ashamed about it at all.
Um, she's also crazy.
She kissed me out of nowhere in the locker room.
Ho-ho! That's erotic! Congratulations! Oh, shit! That's awesome! - Was that your first kiss? - No! Oh, crap.
It was.
I didn't even think about that.
That sucks! Whoa.
She done took your memories, girl.
My first kiss was supposed to be special, at a spring cotillion or with a dangerous older boy in the back of his car.
My first kiss was with a gorilla at a petting zoo.
And he whispered somethin' in my ear.
He said, "We can talk to people.
" Megan, Audrey was just looking for love, the same wsaay Brian is.
There's gays all over reaching out for each other.
Yeah.
We just gotta connect them.
We gotta find Brian some like-minded gays to hang out with.
He's friggin' Dumpster-diving right now.
He's looking for love in a trash bin! It's bullshit, yo! Where the hell's a gay man find a supportive gay community in the modern age? I know exactly where.
Damn, dog, there's frickin' studs everywhere.
It's a meat market.
It's the Internet.
It connects everyone in the freakin' world.
Oh, okay, perfect.
Here we go.
"Men seeking men.
" Click on it, son.
"Looking for hot guy!!!" Well, he used three exclamation marks.
Seems friendly.
"Must be discreet.
" We don't want discreet.
They should be proud and out in the open.
Oh, all right.
Here's another.
"Cute guy.
S.
T.
D.
free and clean.
"No games.
" No games.
Straight shooter.
I want to know more.
Yeah.
Seems promising.
Oh! Oh! It's just a picture of a dick! That dick's gnarled as hell.
Click back, man! Click back! Okay, what's this one? "Door's open.
Walk in and find me on my knees, ass up.
" Oh! Come on! It's another picture of a dong! Why would you click on that? There was obviously gonna be a dick on the other side.
I was intrigued.
Hey, boys.
You enjoying the technology of the Internet? Yo, Martin.
You still work here? Claro, que sÃ.
I gotta get that cheddar, man.
And Mr.
Lewelyn, he's a good guy.
But the stuff these people look at on the Internets, with the webcams and the chat rooms and the tubes no, ay.
Well, Martin, the Internet is a place of perversion.
Gay or straight, people are free to cultivate their fetishes without shame.
My café provides a portal to depravity and I shall pay for my transgressions.
I don't know, man.
Maybe the Internet's too tolerant.
It's chock-full of smut.
Which has its time and its place.
But now is not that time.
You want your brother to live out loud? Take him to the big city.
In the big city, there's no judgments.
This town is too ÿCómo se dice? Close-minded.
Hey, Mexico.
Got a mess for you in the bathroom.
Hey, I no Mexican, guy! I'm from Panama! - Yeah, same thing.
- Back to work.
Ho! That's it! We'll put Brian on a bus to a major metropolis of his choosing.
That's gonna be pretty expensive.
So I'll sell my bike and ride on pegs You frickin' hate pegs! He's my brother, Gary! I'd sell the hair off my damn head if I could.
It wouldn't have to be for wigs either.
They could be using it for ill.
You are so tolerant right now, it's frickin' inspiring.
Yo, there he is! Yo, Brian! What the hell you doing here? I'm your frickin' brother.
And I want you to know I accept you.
Come here.
Whoa! You wanna step to me? No! Aah! Aah! This is my step! - I'm tryin' to be real with you.
-Calm down! He's delivering message of tolerance! Brian, I know you're a homosexual man.
What? I ain't frickin' gay.
Come on! Yeah, you are.
We saw you gettin' humped by a dude behind a Dumpster.
You saw that? Aw, frick! Frick! You don't let anyone see that, Brian! I'll frickin' kick-fight you! Yo, he's about to fight himself! It's okay, man.
We're here to give you support and tolerance until our dyin' days.
I ain't frickin' gay, you idiots! I'm addicted to meth! What? I suck dick for money.
Okay? You get banged behind a Dumpster so you can buy meth? I'll let 'em do whatever they want to me as long as they got sh.
Suck, money, meth.
Suck, money, meth.
That's what I do.
I'll suck anyone here! I'm open for business! At least he's not ashamed to be who he is.
Who he is is terrible.
Yo! Yo.
Lookin' for a party? Yo.
All right.
Eew.
I can't believe my brother's a meth-head hustler.
Just remember drug addiction's a sickness.
So we're gonna have to be more tolerant now than ever.
And deep down inside he's a good man.
It goes up in increments of five.
Lower the hole, the higher the price.
No ears.
No nose.
Creases and crooks are negotiable.
If you can get an angle on it, it's yours to buy.
He's not for sale! Shit! Is that a cop? Why do I always do this? Damn it! No, no, relax.
Get outta he, Joel.
You're ruining my sale.
No! I'm your frickin' brother and I can tolerate a lot of things.
But I can't tolerate you selling your body for crank.
So you got two choices.
You can come home right now and get help from your two brothers Two brothers? Who's the other? Me.
Who the hell do you think? Or you can stay out here and turn tricks and I'll take my bike back, pedal off into the sunset, and you'll never see me again.
Ain't possible.
I sold your bike for meth.
You what? Son of a bitch! You're the worst brother ever! You know he was gonna ride on pegs the rest of his life so you could live in a major metropolis? You can't even steer when you're on pegs.
Well, guess what.
You just lost your brother, both of 'em.
Yo, I gotta go pick up my kid from tee ball.
You gonna suck me off or what? Yeah.
Let's go.
He had it all, and he flushed it down the sewer.
He could've played in the World Cup and delivered America soccer glory.
He would've popularized the sport.
Instead he chose a life of prostitution and drugs.
- He looked like Bill Gates.
- He got the looks in the family.
Who did this? Rose, don't just stand there.
Get the paint.
And have the lawyers ready.
Always have the lawyers ready.
This is going to be a shit-storm from hell.
You've gotta get it together, girl.
Excuse me? Just let it go.
You can't stop it.
It's just, there's no respect.
We in high school.
What do you expect? We cruel as hell.
We don't celebrate differences, we exploit them.
You find a weakness, and you attack.
It's a shark tank.
Me, I'm just trying to get to the beach and graduate.
You're a true gentleman, Mr.
Jenkins.
Shoot, I ain't no angel.
You say something about my size, I'm-a put it right back on you.
As you should.
Did you see this? I know.
You can't just be doggin' Shirley Temple like that.
She's a national treasure.
What? I don't care about that.
I'm talking about Audrey.
No.
She's got a girlfriend now.
Audrey found gay love? That's awesome.
No, it's not.
It's ridiculous.
She said she was obsessed with me, and then the next day she's in a relationship? I thought you weren't gay.
I'm not, but it sort of cheapens the kiss.
It was bad enough.
Give me something.
It's not fair.
Yo, that's how it is, y'all.
Get used to it.
Could be worse.
Could be him.
Look at him! He's different than us! He's a Chinese computer! Everyone laugh! Shark tank, y'll Blood in the water.
Hey, idiot.
I said I never wanted to see you again.
I divorced you as a brother.
All right, fine.
You might want to take this first.
That ain't my bike.
That's a frickin' double speed.
What did you do, steal it? No, man, I bought it.
Oh, yeah? With what? You don't got no money.
Sold my varsity jacket.
You sold your varsity jacket to buy him a bike? Yeah.
Wasn't worth much though.
I had to do a wagon wheel to cover the rest.
What the hell's a wagon wheel? Three guys.
I'm the spokes.
They use my body as a chassis.
Damn.
That's gruesome.
You ain't lyin'? You really did that for me? Yo! A little help? Huh? He's doin' it! He's jugglin'! Oh! That's a frickin' scissor kick! He frickin' scissored it! You still got it! All-frickin'-district.
Hey, not cool, man! Eh, screw off, dickless! Nice kick.
So this is your gay brother? He ain't gay.
But he is my brother.
And he's the coolest guy I ever met.
Yo, that kick move was flyin', man! You like a cracked out David Beckham! David Beckham? I'll take that for a second kiss.
It was delicious! Oh, God! Your mouth tastes terrible.
What is that? It's probably crank and dong.
He's a meth-head hustler.
What? Oh, God.
I've got to go to the nurse So what now? I'm gonna get some help.
Really? You're going to rehab? Rehab? What am I, a frikin' millionaire? Come on, Joel, use your head.
Where are you going, then? There's been a bomb threat.
Everyone, clear out! Oh, shit! Relax There ain't no bomb.
Just a meth-head-suck who's trying to straighten himself out.
Hey! Dick-head! Come and get me! Yo, I love you, big brother! At least, he's getting some help.
Yeah It all worked out in the end.
Stay off-drugs, little brother! Sir, get in the car! Suck my ass, bitch! Jesus, stop resisting, Brian! Just frikin' go in the car! Eh, he's probably better off in jail.